Original subtitles

Right. You hand me the standard.

Pass it to Ewan as the youngest member of the household.

Standards aren't what they wear around here.

We embrace.

And you turn to Molly. I shall be Molly. As the mother of the clan and bow.

Morning, Mum.

Proctor asks for your name. I shall be Proctor. Right.

He asks for your name and he hands you the ring of leadership.

Then you turn to receive the acclaim of the clan.

And hope they don't start chugging anything. Nobody be chugging anything.

Paul Bowman, the Laird MacDonald.

Doesn't quite add up, does it? Add up? Add up? It's not a maths lesson, old

You've served your apprenticeship, son.

You're ready.

Yes, but golly, what role shall I have? I'm sorry, Donald, but there is no role

for the Laird's uncle. I'm sorry.

Oh, just as at Hector's inauguration.

All I got to do then was stand around looking young, dashing and handsome. And

all you get to do now is stand around?

Yes.

What do you mean by that?

Listen, I sent off some samples to a few organic retailers.

What a good idea.

Made them taste it.

Thank you for your confidence.

No, just kidding. It's a great idea. I'm glad I thought of it.

Oh, my God, you're right.

Yeah. Let me see. Yeah, yeah. I'll never play the violin again.

Wind up much.

Hi, Lucy.

Sorry to interrupt.

No, we were just talking business.

I'd better go.

See you later, eh? Yeah.

Lucy?

We're business partners, Lucy. That's all.

I thought we could go down to London on Friday.

Find a nice hotel, catch a show, or stay in.

I'd love to, but I'm getting inaugurated as Laird this weekend.

It's kind of customary to turn up.

No, that's not this weekend, is it? You are coming, aren't you?

I thought it was a clan thing.

You know, family and close friends only.

That's why I want you there.

Then I'd be on it.

Home sweet home.

I suppose.

Molly!

You're back!

Yes.

Why did you call? We could have picked you off. Oh, don't be silly.

If I can make it to New Zealand and back, I can certainly manage a trip from

station. I was worried you weren't going to make it in time.

For your inauguration.

I am the mother of the clan. I have to be there.

Anyway, I went a bit mad. Got everybody present.

And you, Keith, as well.

I'm sorry? New suitcases.

I mean, these aren't the ones you're left with.

But I have a set just like these.

Aye, but they're still upstairs.

I don't know about that.

Unless those are Molly's.

Everything's gone. My clothes, my mementos.

That's what my present was.

Ah!

A photograph of me and Jamie by the lock. I take it with me everywhere.

How much do you reckon this truck will hold, then?

Why? Well, I've got a friend who wants some relish.

10 ,000 joules?

10 ,000?

Supermarket, Jane.

Would you like a cup of tea?

Yeah, thanks.

I told him you're only small scale, but...

He agreed to settle for a thousand.

But I... marketing a product as hard to get only increases its lure. But then

you know that.

Chester, thanks, but no thanks. Too many strings.

Strings? What are you talking about?

Come on, these big commercial operators. They're always trying to take

advantage. But then you know that.

You all right there, Donald?

I could use a glass or something.

Only you seem to be going through my papers.

I had no idea your job was so boring.

It's feudal duty, exactly.

It's an ancient tact on the tenant.

In theory, they're still the vassals of the laird, and they're supposed to pay

me for the privilege of not working my land and fighting my wars.

Really?

How much?

I don't enforce it. Look, I'm all in favour of upholding traditions, but

crucifying tenants isn't one of them.

Actually, crucifixion was rarely the punishment for defaulting tenants.

More often, it was flogging, branding, or merely a week in the stocks.

A proctation.

Donald of the clan of MacDonald.

Oh, my dear lady.

Donald MacDonald.

Delighted. Ah, yes.

The prodigal uncle.

And this is my nephew Paul, the new lad.

You're very welcome here, Proctor. Thank you.

Then Bogle is such a magnificent edifice.

It reverberates with history.

Would you care for a drink, Proctor? Would you have a mead?

Mead?

Sorry, I think it's the beastie off, but I'll just check the garden. A sherry

will be fine.

No.

You're renouncing the feudal duty.

Such a shame.

One more link and our ancient clan heritage lost.

Well, maybe I should reintroduce the Highland Clearances as well. Convict all

the tenants and replace them with sheep. Oh.

Yeah, lady.

You're a little early for the inauguration. I thought we were doing it

Saturday.

I just did.

and to verify the deeds of title.

Can I show you to your room, Proctor? Thank you.

It has a photograph of my son in one of the cases. It's irreplaceable.

No.

I understand.

Thank you.

Molly, this is the clan Proctor, Sheila MacDonald. Molly MacDonald.

Ah, yes.

The Dowager Queen of Glenbogle. Not really, will you? You make me sound like

power behind the throne.

Oh, no, of course not. Paul's not your natural son, is he?

In fact, with his succession, your bloodline will effectively be extinct.

How concisely you put it.

If you'll excuse me a moment.

Goodness. Is that the 23rd Laird of Glenbogle?

Anyway.

Hi. We've got it in here.

Oh, you know.

Oh, yeah.

We'll clean a lot of pots and pans, and I don't think... Now, as you raise, we

used to make our own hooch.

Right, I'm off to MacDougall's to see if they've got that book of poetry order.

Well, no, I'll go.

Let me.

You go home and put your feet up. Good, good, good.

You can grind some man.

Huh? No.

Dad.

Well, don't forget that book.

What? The poetry book.

Right. No, I won't forget that. Okay.

Okay. See you later. See you.

Jeff, hi.

Hi. What are you doing here?

Oh, trying to find a hairdresser who doesn't use sheep's shoes.

Yeah, I met him in Glymphor Goss.

Well, I'm here to see your dad.

Meg. Look, I know I left a bit, well, a bit abruptly.

But I'm back now.

But you don't understand.

He went to pieces when you left. He's still in pieces.

That's why I came back.

To fix things.

You can't.

I don't think anyone can.

I'm sorry, Meg, but he doesn't want to see you.

The ring of lairdship.

Oh.

You don't wear it.

I can never find the wellies to match.

Oh.

The clan proctored a woman.

Oh, that's terrible, isn't it? They'll be letting them wear trousers next.

Well, everything appears to be in order.

The deed of secession, certificates of birth.

You're still called Bowman.

That's my name.

It's unusual for the laird not to be a Macdonald.

but it should have no bearing on your eventual claim to the title.

Eventual? What do you mean, eventual? This is the fascinating part.

Now, according to these clan statutes, the line of primacy leads to the

surviving legitimate male.

Thus, it is not you, but Donald, who is the rightful laird.

Donald? No way.

No, I am perfectly serious.

In cases of pre -mortality possession, the legitimate descendants have prior

claim. Indeed, Donald should have been laird this past year.

She is serious. The president was set in 1735. Never mind the president.

Donald cannot be the laird.

Doesn't even want to be laird, do you, Donald?

Hold on, hold on.

You're saying I've jumped through all these frilly tartan hoops to become the

lead, and I don't... I don't even qualify because I'm illegitimate.

You do qualify, but Donald's claim is the stronger.

Good Lord.

I don't believe this.

Oh, you can't be serious.

Golly, who am I to turn back the tide of destiny?

Oh, dear.

Another family feud.

They seem to spring up wherever I go.

You see, I was rather hoping to go away with Paul this weekend, but then there's

this inauguration thing that he's invited me to. Yeah, it should be a

little knees up.

Where are you going?

He hasn't exactly invited me, but... Well, he said it was family and close

friends. I mean, but, you know, you're a good partner.

Whatever. You won't be missing much, probably being pompous and dull.

This is great.

Well...

Well, I sent off some samples to Elemental, you know, the whole food

And I want to stop my relish in all the stores.

Fantastic. I know.

But how many?

Well, it's only three, but it's a start.

And it's all my own work.

Don't tell Jeff they're like me, yeah?

I don't know what you want me to do.

Talk to the proctor or some other clan elders.

You're the only one with enough clout to make him listen. I'm sorry, Paul, I

can't.

Why? Well, they're all gone, my real family, and now I've lost all my things.

Oh, maybe I'm better off without them.

But Donald can't be led. He thinks the whole business is a joke.

On the contrary, dear boy, I'm quite ready to accept my destiny.

Your destiny? It was mine until five minutes ago.

Really, Paul, if you won't accept ancient traditions, maybe you're not the

bowman for the job. Oh, please stop this, both of you.

What do I have to do to prove myself, Molly?

I just want to be left out of this.

There's nothing I can do, is there?

I'll never be at Macdonald.

I understand, Molly. It's a difficult decision.

No, you don't understand.

It has nothing to do with me anymore, any of it.

How's Donald going to manage?

There's more to be learned than fast cars, rubber checks and posh toy.

Oh, I know.

I know.

It's Paul I'm worried about.

What can we do?

Uphold their tradition of staff throughout the centuries.

Follow however bare the wages.

Sorry!

Sorry!

My dear Paul.

Please forgive me.

Becoming lad so many years after not preparing for it was a bit of a shock.

I may have spoken out of turn.

Not like you, Donald.

I don't know if a title means anything these days.

You'd be surprised.

Rational people start treating you like a fairy princess.

You'll love it. All that pomp and deference.

Pomp and deference, I guess. Now, that will be my burden.

I'm sure you'll cope.

Oh, I'm sure I won't.

Not without you.

Face it, Paul, I can scarcely cope with my wardrobe.

I'd like you to stay on as manager.

Well, that's a very generous offer.

Yes, I amaze myself sometimes. The answer's no.

I'm sure we'll get the hang of it, Donald.

After all, you were born to this.

How was it?

Are you sure about that?

It's a bit short on amenities, is it not?

Fresh air, sunshine, peace.

What other amenities do I need?

No, you're not worried about your heart.

Yes.

Yes, that's why I'm here.

Molly, I don't understand.

Everyone wants me to sort out their problems and I can't.

Oh, golly. My family's scattered and... everything just seems to bring more

pain.

I know what you mean.

You mean he isn't going to be left?

No. When was he going to tell me?

Maybe he doesn't believe it himself.

But he's told Isabel.

Ah, yes, now.

If... Isabel does fancy a chance with him.

Maybe, but he's not going to be led.

How so?

Oh, you see, he's been sacked.

The last thing he's going to do is sit around here moping about it. You mean

he'll leave?

Yeah, he is.

Taking you with him.

Leaving? Leaving Isabel here, far behind. With only dear old Chester to

It's going to be hard, but I'll do my best to console her. Yeah, I bet you

Not every clown has a silver lining.

Some are platinum.

Laird's choice.

Yes.

Which Laird is that? Paul suggested it. Ah, the young pretender.

Anyway, turns out you should have signed this when you were about it.

It's only a formality.

Apparently I need the Laird's permission to run the business for my farm. Ah.

Do you really?

Donald, there's no catch.

And it will bring in jobs and money for the community.

Some sort of profit -sharing arrangement, is it? Not as such. Perhaps

be as such.

And who would I be sharing my profits with? Well, me, of course, eh? 20%. 20

In return for my seal. Of course, a flat fee would save on the paperwork.

How about five grand a year?

How about you get stuffed?

What an exhaustion!

My dear girl, you're addressing the laird.

Oh, well, pardon me.

How about you get stuffed, you lairdship?

I know it's a bit of a blow, but it might turn out for the best.

I mean, what with your looks and my brains, we could go anywhere, do

We? What do you think Chester would say about that?

Chester can always find someone else.

I won't.

What's up?

A new laird and master wants a share of our profits. That looks up.

This must be a wind -up. Oh, yeah, I'm laughing so much I'm splitting my sides.

Why don't you just set up shop somewhere else and let him get away with this?

You can't do this, Donald. It's a disincentive.

You want to encourage people like Isabel, not punish them.

I'm not punishing her, dear boy.

But if the laird doesn't enforce his rights, he may as well not exist.

But you can't put a tax on your tenants' businesses.

If I can't, who can?

Yes, if you were the laird, things might be different.

But you're not laird, are you?

There's nothing I can do.

Sorry.

It's okay.

Let's go.

Hello. Are you all right?

Now, this way, you can't drive off without a word.

Like yesterday?

Not that you'd ever do anything like that, of course.

I was scared.

I just wanted time to work things out.

It's a need -to -my -own -space sort of thing.

Well, I had no idea you were so keen to get rid of me.

You can believe that if you like.

Why did you come back?

Well, I've lost my passport.

Can't travel without it.

It takes six weeks to get a new one.

I haven't seen it, sorry.

Right.

Well, I'll keep on looking.

Yeah, me too.

Goodbye, Gawley.

Bye.

No, we're not one of these big chains who tries to stuff their small

Elemental's policy is to pay up front.

Oh, my God.

A real actual check.

That'll keep the bank manager happy.

Now, when can you gear up to start delivery?

Soon. Just got a bit of paperwork to do. No big deal.

Well, I'm glad I came up. Everything I heard is true.

Everything you heard?

About you and your product.

Just sent off a sample.

We get hundreds of samples.

You were personally recommended by a friend of the chairman.

Chester somebody?

Chester somebody.

And here I am.

And here you are.

When I say no thanks, I mean no thanks, Chester.

Is Isabel my friend at the supermarket?

No, your friend from Elemental. I don't need any favours.

Oh, come on, Isabel.

I can save you so much agro.

I can even have a word with Donald about this closing your tenancy.

How do you know about that?

I hear things. It's a curse.

Paul and I want to build up the business ourselves.

Yeah, but things have changed, haven't they?

Hmm?

Well, if Paul doesn't become laird, then he's going to need a job, not a hobby.

I know he's too proud to accept my help, but I thought you had more sense.

Come on, Isabel.

Face it.

Either you can seize this opportunity with both hands or you're going to end

sitting in a kitchen peeling sprouts, dreaming about it.

Hey, boss.

Not any more.

Oh, right.

Yeah, I forgot.

You quit?

I never quit.

I wasn't appointed.

Yes, they told you that, and you just rolled over.

What was I supposed to do?

Stand up for yourself, Paul.

And for Oliver.

Came this morning.

Every tenant on the estate got one.

We've had a bit of a makeover.

What the hell is this, Donald?

Feudal duty.

You seriously want your tenants to pay you for not working your land?

According to ancient custom, it's only a token amount.

Backdated ten years. People can't afford this.

I can't be blamed if certain former incumbents neglected to collect it.

This Lord and Vassal stuff is ludicrous. It's obsolete.

On the contrary.

It's the very cornerstone of lordship, a cherished link to the past.

I'm sure that... The peasants will be delighted to pay it. Oh, keep this up,

Donald, and the peasants will form a co -op and buy the land out from under you,

and then you'll be laird and naff all.

I'm not worried by that, rabble. Ha!

Who'll lead them?

Maybe I will. Oh, you're coming close to treason, dear boy. Well, let's come a

bit closer, shall we? You're so keen on ancient traditions. Try this one. You

are not fit to be laird.

You dare challenge me for the title?

Very well.

Oh, for God's sake, Donald.

I'm warning you, I have experience.

I'm warning you, I have experience.

Yeah, well, so do I. Oh, good.

All right, then, we'll get the proctor. We'll get the proctor back. She can

administer the Laird's challenge if she deems you worthy. The Laird's challenge?

You... Seriously think I'm going to settle this with some haggis tossing

contest? The challenged party chooses the battlefield.

And the clan proctor won't settle for anything less.

Fine. Fine.

Bring it on.

What do you do with that?

Oh, slice me some porridge.

I need all my strength for the trials ahead.

So far, so good.

Sorry to do this to you.

I might need you to turn me in, Donald.

Listen, Paul, I respect tradition. I don't idolise it.

That's what gets people into trouble.

Very kind of you to put me out.

Say that, you're very welcome.

In disputes like these, it's best if the umpire resides on neutral territory.

Well, it's just what the place needed, a good civil war.

Me, didn't it?

Cheers. Cheers.

Excellent.

Please.

So, just between us, who do you fancy for the title then? No, I mustn't

speculate.

Would you believe some people bet on the outcome of these contests?

Very cynical.

Traditionally, there have always been three tests of fitness, wisdom and

leadership.

Well, Donald doesn't stand a chance, does he?

Without a bit of divine intervention.

Oh, no.

The best laid schemes of mice and men gang after glade. Is that right?

No, the test of wisdom is a quiz on plan history.

Set by myself, of course.

Oh, well, we'd better put that somewhere safe then, hadn't we?

Good.

Little top -up, Sheila.

Oh, no, I shouldn't.

Why not?

Mm,

smells good.

Very.

Don't fill the lid.

It's not inside a train, it lives.

It's making the most of what you got.

Even us girls have to play dirty sometimes.

You buzzed your little ship.

I did.

Who's this?

Oh, Shirley.

Yes, he does want to blend into the woodwork. Shirley, this is my cook,

Your name's Shirley.

Is there a problem?

No, no. Shirley and I met years ago when he was working in Japan.

Got into a bit of bother with the Yakuza betting syndicate.

And I smuggled him out.

Must have been some size or two case.

I'm here to repay the favour.

Very loyal of you. Least I could do.

One thing I won't tolerate is disloyalty.

Thank me a hamper.

Shirley and I are going to survey the field of battle.

We'll put in plenty of bananas then.

Molly, listen, you know that Paul has challenged Donald for the lurcher. Mm

If you turned up to support Paul, it would mean a lot.

Oh, golly, I... I know he's not your son. I know that.

He needs you.

He's more to family than just your bloodline.

I know that connections with people bring pain, but pain's part of life. No

sorrow, no joy.

The people you've loved, even if they've gone, the love they bring you

makes you richer.

And you should be grateful for that.

We both should.

What are all those people doing here?

They're here to support their rightful lord.

You didn't think you were on your own, did you?

Ladies and gentlemen, the first contest is a trial of strength and endurance.

The contenders must carry these weights down to the far flag and back.

The first to return is the winner.

Look.

Paul,

now when I asked you to sort out the lease with Donald, I didn't expect you

lead a rebellion.

Oh, when I'm lad again, I will sort it out.

Passionate observer, remember?

Step forward, please, contenders.

The lad nominates a champion!

That is permissible.

Hang on a minute.

Hold on.

doing it i don't know where you biscuit who the hell's this yes yes okay

take up your weight

I declare Donald McDonald is the winner.

No, no, you can't let that stand.

Paul's track was waterlogged. Sorry, the ground was the same for both

competitors.

Pleasure doing business.

Is there anything I can get you, Sherry?

Some oxygen, perhaps?

Right, out of here. Come on.

Easy, girl.

Any time to cheer him up when this is all out.

Thank you, Ted.

I'm quite exhausted after all that effort. Gentlemen!

Gentlemen?

You know, your pal was lucky.

If Paul hadn't had that patch of bog.

No such thing as luck, dear boy.

Merely divine providence.

What were those war tanks for?

For a woman, a modern woman like yourself, to uphold these old -fashioned

traditions.

Oh, you do get the odd fuddy -duddy.

Thank you.

But, you know, even in the 18th century, women were custodians of ritual.

Yeah? Arbitrate of ancient customs.

You don't say. Particularly regarding fertility and the harvest.

But you don't want to know about that.

Fertility? I'm all ears.

Hello? Hey.

Oh, hi.

No, I need a hand.

Cramming, exam technique.

What did you have in mind?

Well, I thought I could write the answers really small and cover your

No, you're OK. I've got help.

All right, of course, Lucy, yeah. Actually, I don't know where Lucy is.

Really?

Don't you know how much this means to you?

Yeah. Well, how come it means so much to you?

I don't know. It'll cost me a fortune.

Oh, I don't want to lose a business partner.

Yeah. Yeah, of course.

And I don't want to lose you.

Hello, Belle.

Hey. Can I have some tea?

Hi, what? I'll sort it.

You just beat some learning into the laird here.

Oh, I wouldn't worry about him.

Donald knows about clan history. He could tattoo an image of his nipple.

All right, Donald, now concentrate.

In 1545, Hamish of Tremors took Anya McDougall to be his bride.

Was that before or after he was gored by an elk?

Why are you married in this if you're the one taking the test?

Because this is how we learn our heritage, at our mother's knee.

Though my mother's knees were probably hairier than yours.

Thank you, Yun.

Memorize this.

And then balance.

The questions for the quiz tomorrow.

Don't tell me you disapprove of cheating.

The Laird makes the law. The Laird cannot cheat, ipso facto.

But I confess, I am touched by this unexpected show of devotion.

I have my reasons, O 'Keefe. How can I ever repay you? A suitcase full of

fivers, or marriage. Perhaps I need an heir, and you're quite presentable.

I've spoken full.

Ah.

Paul's a very lucky man.

Chee one. Oh.

Yeah?

Hello.

Hi.

Are you all right?

Yeah, it's, uh... Must be just a tummy bug or something.

in the house all the time.

Thanks.

Listen, I know that, like I said before, I know that I interfered back then, but

when I tried to help, I just wanted you to be happy.

I still do.

Whatever you do, wherever you go,

you're a free spirit, Meg.

was what I liked about you.

That's all.

Anyway, I... I hope that the stupid things I

said don't spoil your memories.

Yeah, well, I hope so, too.

You have a safe journey, lass.

And a happy life.

Yeah.

You too.

Right.

What nickname was given to Rory MacDonald when he became Laird? Rory of

Silver Arm.

And in which year did he succeed?

1560.

I think it was 1566. It was 1566.

Donald is seven points in the lead.

If he answers the next question correctly, the contest is over.

What emblem did Hugh MacDonald adopt?

at the Battle of the Dry Ford.

Was it the eagle holding the thistle? It was!

That was a very lucky guess.

This contest is concluded.

I declare Donald the Laird with no further contest.

Thank you, and I invite one or all to a ball in the hall tonight here in the

castle.

And shall we say a tenner each for the kitty?

I don't believe this.

Why are we all down?

This is not right.

I'm sorry, Paul, but you did your best.

You're upset, but it'll be okay.

Yeah. Call your friends in the business.

Good girl.

Tell them that I'm not interested.

Tell me why people think that failure is a sign of integrity.

Well, because, Chester, sometimes it is.

I don't think I don't know what you're up to.

You're not trying to help Paul. You're trying to elbow him out.

I won't let you do it. Is it because of some Florence Nightingale thing that

women are drawn to losers?

Paul's not a loser. He'll never be a loser.

Quite sweet, though.

The way you keep comparing yourself to him.

But believe me, not a good idea.

Molly?

Oh, Meg!

What are you doing here?

I was going to ask you the same thing.

Well, I lost my cases and... Oh, never mind.

Does Golly know you're back?

Oh, yes.

He knows.

What's wrong?

Mollia, I know you two are close.

Could you give him a message for me?

You're not leaving again.

I don't know.

I think I might have to.

It's all changed now. I just make.

When you and Golly were together, he was the happiest I've ever seen him.

Yes, he's proud and he's stubborn. Yeah, me too. Well, if you know that, what's

the problem?

Oh, Molly.

I'm pregnant.

Oh, well.

That's wonderful.

But you can't leave now. Not like this. I can't stay either.

But you must tell him. No, no, no, no.

It's over between us.

And I don't want him to take me back because of the baby.

I mean, that just wouldn't be fair on either of us.

Listen, you must not tell him I'm pregnant.

You promise me?

Just... Just tell him he was right.

That what we had was wonderful.

And that nothing he could ever see could spoil my memories of it.

Doesn't mean to scare you.

Look, there's something you should know.

25 inches.

Oh, good. It'll have to be nine carats. I demand to see Donald MacDonald.

Is it inauguration time already? I have reason to believe they were cheating

during the Laird's challenge.

You know, I never did trust that nephew of mine.

Not by him. By you.

Are you impugning my honour, madam?

Do you deny it?

Not categorically, no.

Then the contest is void, and your title is forfeit.

I will not allow you to be inaugurated as laird.

My dear lady, I'm so sorry to hear you say that, but you changed your mind

and perhaps I can persuade you to change your mind again.

I'm sorry, Paul, but you could look on this as a new beginning.

There are loads of opportunities for someone with your experience.

A trainee lad who's failed his exams.

Well, maybe you weren't supposed to just sit around here gathering moss.

You can go anywhere. You can do anything.

You know what? You're absolutely right.

Tell with it.

Tell with a lot of them.

Paul, Ewan's on the phone. He says it's urgent.

Paul?

Not your problem anymore.

He's locked up Sheriff Macdonald. I'm telling you, Donald's worse than... How

much sharper than a

serpent's tooth is the base ingratitude of a little cook.

I'm sorry it's not an authentic dungeon, but it kept the servants away from the

carriage. Donald, what is this going to do?

I am hoping to persuade the proctor here to anoint me as laird. You must be

deranged. Then perhaps you should pray for a knight in shining armour.

Only they're a little thin on the ground these days. You're keeping us locked up

in here until we rot. Well, it's traditional. I thought you liked that

thing. Goodbye.

But why didn't you tell me Meg had come back?

You said you didn't want to be bothered with other people's problems. Oh, golly.

Well, I've got to get the crock today before someone reports a missing.

What about Donald's friend Shirley?

Come on, there's more of us than there are of them.

What do you think, Paul?

I think you should call the police.

Or we could sort it out ourselves.

Well, what we need is a plan of attack and someone to lead us.

For your family.

Well, first we've got to get in somehow.

That's a boy.

OK.

OK, so, Jess, we all hit the house at the same time.

Golly, you take the front door.

Isabel, Jeff, look for open doors and windows.

Lucy, you come in with us, yeah?

Yes, I am.

OK, yeah, you go with Isabel, and I'll take the first floor.

Maybe it would help to have someone on the inside.

Sushi, Shirley. Something I picked up in Nagasaki.

The hot pot is getting the seaweed.

Oh, out of my way, you silly man.

She has such a way about her.

Don't know what to do.

Have a look. I see.

Sushi. Shirley's done patrol supper.

Ed, you cannot possibly wear those rancid old tween.

Oh. Doesn't this feel more aristocratic?

Oh, yes.

Mmm. Oh.

I feel a sudden urge to execute someone.

It must be Paul.

Quick, go and help Shirley.

I'm not going to keep in vain today.

Turn back.

Come on. Come on.

Shh. Where's Paul?

And where's your precious money?

Surrender now and nobody gets fired. Someone's going to get fired, all right.

Yeah, that gorilla of yours nearly broke my hand. A fitting punishment for

challenging the rightful laird. Paul's a rightful laird. Ha!

We need no other.

Are we agreed?

Yes.

Very touching.

But hardly a tradition, Proctor.

Then we'll make it a tradition.

The fun's over, Donald.

No more royal decrees, no more taxing the tenants.

Glenbogle needs a laird who understands what the word means. Now hand over the

ring.

Such a fuss.

All you had to do was ask.

Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me.

Paul?

A word?

Mind if you give it to her next time?

Congratulations on a successful coup d 'etat.

A coup is not successful, Donald, until the previous incumbent's been strung up.

Oh, don't be like that. I served a greater purpose in the end. Don't you

you've proved yourself, that you've seized your destiny?

You're not going to tell me that you were trying it on the whole time.

I may have stretched it out a bit, but I was enjoying myself.

Enjoying yourself?

But I felt so... Rejected you, sir. So, yes, been there, done that, you see.

I knew what was eating you, Paul.

The fear you were never good enough.

It used to consume me. I suppose it still does.

But you're a real MacDonald. And you're a real MacDonald, too.

The clans acclaimed you, accepted you.

Of course, one person you really had to convince was yourself.

You were born to be laird, dear boy.

I wouldn't last a month before they dragged me off to the guillotine.

How did you win that quiz?

Quiz? Ah, well.

You wouldn't believe me if I told you.

Paul, may I have a word?

You know Maggie's leaving?

Yep. I wouldn't be waving her off at the station, no.

Why? What are you afraid of?

Pain is part of life, remember?

No sorrow, no joy.

So, golly, what are you doing here?

You gave Donald the questions.

Why?

Because I didn't want you to be loud.

I thought if you weren't, then we'd have a better chance.

It's complicated.

Not for me, it wasn't.

You knew what this meant to me, Lucy.

I did it because I love you.

I wanted us to be together.

And I knew that if you loved me, I could tell you and you'd forgive me.

I'm not sure I can forgive you.

Because you don't love me, do you?

Lucy.

I wanted to.

It's just... It's just Isabel, isn't it?

It's always been Isabel.

That bus quits then.

Can I get a yellow bag, Miss?

Okay. We get a move on.

Train leaves in 20 minutes.

I know, I know.

There's another train tomorrow.

There's a train every day, in fact. Sometimes two.

Not a bad settler. Look, we cannot start again, Gawley.

Yes, we can.

Love you, Meg.

I wouldn't dream of keeping you prisoner.

Polly told you, didn't she?

Yeah.

I knew you'd believe in some time.

No, I... I mean about the baby.

What baby?

Didn't know.

No.

Our baby.

Isabel,

hi. Hi. I just realized I never invited you to the inauguration.

At least you said...

She's not coming.

Lucy and I aren't anymore.

Oh.

I'm sorry.

Yeah.

Yeah, so am I.

So, are you coming to this ceremony, then?

I thought it was for friends and family only.

It is.

And you are.

Tonight, on the beach, seven o 'clock.

It's a bit short notice.

No, no, no, no, no. No, come on. No, I didn't mention it because I just took it

for granted that you'd be there. Excuse me? You took me for granted?

No, I didn't mean it like that. Look.

Why do you make this so difficult?

Do you want to come or don't you? I'd love to.

But I'm busy.

Sorry.

Have a nice party, though.

Molly, are you still doing without earthly possessions?

Someone just dropped these off.

Is your name Paul Bowman?

My name is Paul Bowman MacDonald.

Paul Bowman MacDonald.

Accept this ring of lairdship on behalf of your clan.

Rule wisely, and may God keep you in wisdom, health, and joy.

I'm so glad you didn't listen to me.

Aren't you going to ask her to dance?

Oh, I did not condition.

That's great.

You were a terrible lad, you know.

Yes, and I might be again. I'm still out of the throne, you know.

You never give up, do you?

Good back, mate.

So please, you ask me.

You'd have turned up anyway.

Yeah.

Lucy sends her love.

Oh, come on, you know it wasn't down to her.

I'm a bad influence.

You're a good guy. You could straighten her out.

She told me she was busy.

She is busy.

Playing you like a big old fish.

You know

how it is,

Chester.

If a thing's worth having, it's worth cherishing.