Original subtitles

Hot soup!

Oh, man.

Leon's on fire tonight, boys.

Next basket for the win.

Mikey, be up. Let's shut his flashy blue face down.

You can't guard me.

Double me, I dare you. Are you daring us to double you?

No, I'm double daring you to double me. You see, he's not just double daring us

to double you.

I'm open. Transfer it.

Sorry, Don Ton.

I got a win. Tried losing once. Wasn't for me. Win at all costs.

Boom.

Catchphrase win. It happens every time.

Not the dancing. Anything but the dancing.

Let's get out of here.

I'm the best. I'm the best.

I'm the best. I'm the best. I'm the best. I'm the best. I'm the best. What?

Nice moves, man.

Are you also a player turned billionaire owner slash coach slash recording

artist Tim Dunkman? Call me the Dunk.

I saw those sweet dance moves and I got a business proposition for you.

It's no secret that my team stinks.

They're losers.

You know what? I couldn't buy a sack of nickels with any of them. A sack of

what? You know what? I like the pep of your pizza and the squeak of your

you'd like to be. Your new power forward who makes a winning dunk in game seven?

No, of course not. You're just a random guy with ollie green skin playing in the

park. What I need is someone to get my crowd hyped, to get my team hyped. I

you to be the mascot for my New York Dave.

Still great.

Wait, I thought you were called the Vipers.

Congratulations!

You have won a contest to rename the team.

What's it gonna be?

Dragon Dunkers?

I'm Dave.

Dave! Dave!

Dave! Dave! Dave! What do you say?

I'm in.

Let's go.

Yeah, let's go. Come on.

Mr.

The Dunk, I'm so sorry. I'm doing my best out there. It's not your fault.

It's these losers.

Have you ever thought... Never mind. Don't hold out on the dunk, kid. What

got? Well, one time I was in a rut, but I found a lucky rock.

Next thing you know, no more ruts. So what's so special about that rock? It's

not about the rock.

It's about changing your mojo.

So you're saying... You need to do whatever it takes to change your mojo.

you do that by... Whatever it takes.

You guys are in luck. I'm breaking out my new victory dance once we win

Yeah, right.

Trust me, I'm on the inside.

As a mascot?

More of a consultant who wears a costume and fires a t -shirt cannon.

Dunk listens to me. We haven't won a game all season.

But that all changes tonight. Because you've got something no one else has.

Heart? No, me, an eccentric billionaire willing to do whatever it takes to win,

including purchasing an ancient good luck arch that will change our losing

to winning mojo. My arch is going to turn you wannabes into Arby's.

Andy, put that on my next album.

Now let's go in.

Those guys are going to whoop the day.

Yeah, let's go.

Come on, let me hear you.

And now, the starting lineup for your New York days.

Yeah, let's go. Come on. Let me hear you.

hehehehehehehehehehehehe

Are you noticing anything weird going on with the team? Yeah, they're awesome.

That arch must really be working. My idea.

Yeah, Dave, is it? That arch is severely missing.

That would explain why they're so creepy and not human.

Boys, looks like this trip just went from personal to business.

Hey, you're all just jealous that once I joined the Daves, they went from losers

to Leos, which means winners.

That's not good.

That is so good!

Yes!

Uh,

Sir Dunk, I think we may have accidentally bought an evil arch that

not have possessed your players.

Who cares?

They're winning!

I can't thank you enough!

Winning takes...

So about that arch thingy. You think?

That is why I've called an expert on all things mystic. Point me at the idiot.

Do you know what you've done?

What? That is the Arch of Aquina. Whoever walks under it is turned into,

don't know, a demonic warrior.

Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Without admitting any fault, there may have been

some sign.

Power to all who cross under me.

The only way to reverse the power of the arch is to defeat its demons in battle.

Ah, yes. So in this case, a game of basketball.

Donnie, I know you know how to say it. We're all on to you.

Okay, here's the plan. Let me in. You need a full team.

Look, Leo, we need to work as a team.

Take your win -it -all -cost attitude back to your boy, Dunk.

Hey!

You're right.

Huh? I'm sorry.

That eccentric billionaire who was kind of a surrogate father figure to me has

shown me a version of myself I don't like. I've been a ball hog, a bad

And worst of all, I've been a... I've been a bad... I've been a bad...

I'm going to say it.

I've been a bad...

Brother! I mean, I'm a brother!

Let's be ballers.

Yeah! Time to put your evil spirit back in the ark.

About to pass.

Boom shakalaka!

Down, down.

Boom. Was your mama a house?

Because you're putting up bricks.

Yeah.

Time out.

You know what? I've got to do everything myself.

It's on.

Former employee I looked at like a surrogate son.

Game on!

Let's go!

Fuck it!

Time out.

They're too good.

Maybe we just need to accept we're under arch rule now. We can do this. I've got

an idea.

Donnie, you ready to win this thing? You're just going to bounce throw it off

head again, aren't you?

No, they're expecting me to take the last shot. That's why you're going to do

it. Me?

Rain dance!

And boom goes the Donnie Mike.

Dame blouses.

Are we sure about this?

What? Yeah.

I believe in you. You've got this.

Your confidence is giving me... confidence.

Team on three. One, two, three. Team!

Hmm.

Yeah, run!

A bounce pass.

Out of the way!

A drip drop.

I'm team!

Did you know he would miss?

Just because I became a team player doesn't mean Donnie is magically good at

basketball. Lucky Rock.

Lucky Rock. Do -do -do -do -do. Lucky Rock.