Original subtitles

Every time you make fun of what I'm talking about, but I'm telling you

the way it's going to work. You see, the smartest thing you ever did was asking

me to be your partner in this tournament. You're looking at yourself

say that, because you will be riding the back of the man who's going to take you

to the championship of the charity pinnacle tournament.

Yes, you do look like a beast of burden.

But what I want to see is less talk and more card playing. So do I. I'm tired of

Thompson and Phelps winning the tournament year after year. And that's

asked you to be my partner. I have nothing against Claire, but she doesn't

to win.

You know, Nicole is the same way. She plays for fun. We have to be ruthless.

No mercy.

We'll polish off Thompson and Phelps like a couple of hors d 'oeuvres.

That's right.

Now, let's talk about her sickness. No, you're talking. No, you're talking,

partner. Okay.

Now, when I have a strong hand, I'll say something like, Mrs.

Jackson's hip is mending beautifully.

You're going to say it like that?

Yeah. Can the people playing against us...

Because if you're going to sit there and say, Mrs.

Jackson's hip is mending beautifully.

Okay, give me an example.

Give me an example of one of your signals. Go ahead. Now, check this out.

know, the pump flows freely and makes

the river run wild.

Is your wife upset because you're not playing with her in the tournament? No.

And Claire shouldn't be either.

You're not that good anyway.

Hey, how are you feeling?

Hi.

Dear, you're not upset with me because you're not playing with me in this

tournament, are you?

Any woman in her right mind would be disappointed.

Not to be able to play with a pinnacle expert?

But inside, that woman is torn up.

What are you laughing at?

I'm listening, Cliff.

He's so silly. He thinks I'm upset because I'm not playing with him.

Same thing with James the Pinochle King.

I'd rather play with you than him any day. Well, thank you very much. I'd

play with you, too, somebody who's not so competitive.

All I ever hear is, why did you play that card?

What kind of bit was that anyway?

And I know you've heard this one.

Whose side are you on anyway?

Oh.

But suppose we did wind up playing them. That would be fine with me.

I can read James like a book. When James has a bad hand, he starts to smooth his

beard like this.

And when he has a good hand, he starts rocking from side to side.

He sits very still, and his face gets very long.

But when he has a good hand, his head stops.

See, that's why y 'all don't win nothing.

You and Nicole have your strategies all worked out?

Are you getting worried?

No, no.

Oh, my.

Running a little late, aren't you? Yes, I am.

We have got a serious babysitting problem tonight.

Sondra and Elvin can't watch Olivia because the twins have got the chicken

Oh, yes. I heard about that.

I've been through the babysitting list from A to Z. No luck.

I'm desperate.

who's available, someone who is very responsible, a babysitter

You wouldn't by any chance be talking about Rudy Huxtable, would you?

Well, thank you very much for volunteering, Rudy, but I don't think

for this responsibility.

Who's this 12 -year -old when she first babysat me?

Right, Mom?

Oh, honey, how am I supposed to remember how old Denise was?

We can't even remember how old she is now.

Well, I guess I'm in no position to argue. Okay, Rudy, you got it.

Brother -in -law, you are making one good deal.

You're going to be amazed at my babysitting talents.

I assume this is a paying job?

Yes,

it is. How much do you want?

Five dollars.

You got it. I'm in seven.

Let me take this deal now before the price goes up.

There you go.

This is only $5. You'll get the other two when I know my daughter is still

alive.

It's nice to see one of my children bringing some money into the house.

Hi. Guess what, Olivia? I'm going to be babysitting you tonight.

Great. We're going to have fun together.

If you pay attention to your sitter.

I've left the number where we're going to be on the fridge.

Okay. And do me a favor, you all. I would like to find this house in the

condition as when we left it. Dad, please. I'm 12 years old. All right,

Now remember, Olivia's bedtime is at 8.

And don't forget to like and subscribe.

Mom, I got it covered.

What time can I expect you back?

Well, your mother will be back early, but I'll still be in return.

I will not dignify that remark.

Tonight, my cards will do the talking. Yes, well, I hope your cards are worthy

of the person playing with them.

And I do hope that you will button up, Buttercup, because that wind is gusty

there. No problem, then.

Bye, sweetheart. All right. Bye, Olivia.

Don't forget.

Lock up after.

Now, time for the TV and ice cream.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold it!

You already had ice cream. Now go upstairs, brush your teeth, and get into

pajamas. And you sound like a real sitter.

Thank you very much.

And then when you're done, maybe you can watch a little TV.

Oh, man.

Oh, Danielle, listen to this.

First, Olivia asked me for water.

We both know that trick.

And then she told me that Denise lets her take the mattresses off her bed and

build a fort with them before she goes to sleep.

Remember when we used to try that trick?

Uh -oh. I put her in the bed.

I gotta go. I got everything covered. See you tomorrow. Bye.

Olivia, what are you doing up?

It's okay if I watch TV with you. Forget it. I already let you watch TV. Now go

upstairs to bed.

Just ten more minutes, please.

I'll show up on my way to sleep.

I can feel my eyes closing right now.

This is a scary movie. I don't want you to have nightmares.

I like scary movies.

Ten more minutes, please.

All right, ten more minutes.

Not because of that pitiful look, either.

I know those looks.

Expert edit.

Wow, that street is really dark.

Uh -oh, he stopped walking.

Rudy, what's happening to that man's face?

Well, he's a vampire most nights. But tonight, because it's full moon out,

a vampire and a werewolf.

They're going to get me.

Olivia, they're not going to get you because they're not real.

Yes, they are. They're going to get me and eat me.

Anyway, they're in London.

Why did you do that?

Because it was scaring you.

But I have to see the end.

Why? To make sure the vampire wolves are dead.

Olivia, I'm not turning the television back on. on until you go upstairs and go

to bed.

Who was that?

It was probably just the wind blowing the back gate.

I'm scared. I want Daddy and Denise.

Olivia, they're in Washington.

Are the vampire wolves in Washington?

Fresh enough. And we'll see you guys later. Okay. Good luck. All right.

Aren't you wishing us luck?

You need skill, dear.

I would wish you skill, but then I would still be wishing.

Wouldn't I?

Look at her.

Oh, look at this.

Wow.

This is six months at my house, six months at your house. Partner.

Beam. All right.

Look at a little poochie poochie.

They even have a trophy for the second place winner.

Doesn't even say pinnacle. It's too small.

Ladies and gentlemen, the champions of the last three years, Carolyn Thompson

and Alfred Self.

is beautiful.

And this one is a lot larger than the one we won last year. You're right.

I'm going to have to raise a bookshelf just to fit it in.

And as always, six months on my shelf, six months on yours.

You got it, partner.

Dr. Huxtable.

Dr. Harmon.

No, I'm still scared.

It's okay. It's just a movie.

What was that?

It was just the wind.

Well, it's the window. The vampire wasn't going to get us.

Olivia, I have to put you to bed now.

No, that was probably just the branch.

I'll stay with you so you won't be frightened.

I just had to make sure you were all right.

You are my responsibility.

Are you okay?

No, I'm stressed that the vampire wolves are going to get me.

Olivia, for the last time, there are no vampire wolves.

Campbell and Harmon, Phelps and Thompson. So they're still playing over

All right, so we play Phelps and Thompson.

Good luck playing that one. Good luck. Thank you. We're going to need it. We're

going to need it.

Say, listen, Phelps and Thompson, take it easy.

These are our wives.

Yeah, we love these women. If you beat them up too much, you'll have to answer

to us. That's right.

Thank you.

Thank you.

You beat Phelps and Thompson?

Uh -huh.

Olivia, it's me, Rudy. Open up.

Well, how do I know it's you?

Who does it sound like?

How do I know they didn't turn you into a vampire wolf and you're just trying to

fool me?

If you don't open this door, you are going to stay in there.

I turned on all the lights and set buoy traps on both stairs.

yesterday. I certainly did and she filled me in on everything.

She told me how she went over there on Saturday and she stayed all day and how

she pulled that bed over to the window and she told Stella she had to get

because she had a party to go to. It's your play clip.

Oh, it's a good thing too.

I tell you, Stella looked a lot better yesterday than she did three days ago.

Oh, yeah.

I mean, we just didn't know what to think.

You can.

Cliff, it doesn't matter anyway because you don't have any Trump.

Play.

You know what I want to do? I want to send some flyers. Oh, that is so nice.

you know what she really wants?

What? Janet Jackson's autograph.

Oh, isn't that sweet?

Do you have any points, dear?

We have.

Oh, that means we have 23.

I went for my second set of x -rays yesterday, and you know what my

told me. Know what?

Don't slouch, dear. That's bad for your back.

Told me that I have straightened up considerably.

Stop. And have more space in my neck.

Look, I go to mine tomorrow. I have my first set of x -rays.

I am so excited. I can't wait to hear what he's got to tell me. Play, Cliff.

Game. We win.

We win.

Don't start with me, Huxtable.

Okay, let's have one more picture with the winners and their husbands.

Sweetheart, what do you think? Isn't our trophy nice?

Yes. Where's your trophy, honey?

You know you have to hold your trophy.

Here, hold it.

Now, sweetheart, go stand next to Dr. Hammond.

And you can hold that trophy together, and we'll hold ours.

Certainly an enjoyable evening.

Yeah. And who would have thought that we would win such a nice trophy, you know?

Well, dear, you know, since we're married, I feel that half of that trophy

belongs to me, too.

The reality is, sweetheart, what's ours is ours.

And what's yours is in your pocket.

You're a nasty little woman.

Oh, my goodness.

What is this?

Oh, look at this.

All the lights are on?

And the TV is on.

And dear, I know exactly what happened. What happened? Look at this.

Vampires and werewolves of London.

I told that girl about watching those horror movies. And got scared, too.

Look at this.

Why do they have to tear the house up? Because they're scared, dear.

Over the beard?

Yes.

And got a little cross made out of a spoon and a fork.

But why is Olivia holding that piece of meat?

Don't you understand, dear?

That's the stake to drive through the vampire's heart.

I'll get Rudy.

and I've got a little Igor here.

You should bite one of them on the neck.