Original subtitles

I want those guys. Give me those guys.

Give me those guys.

Give me those guys. I'll feed them to you. Okay.

Okay.

Open your mouth. Open your mouth.

Close your eyes.

My

woman.

Oh, man.

Isn't this wonderful?

Yes. Just you and me.

Don't you just love it? Yes, and I love you.

But I love your parents even more for taking everybody out of the house.

Finally,

we're home. Oh, man, I thought we'd never see Brooklyn again.

Yeah, but you know, no matter how nice a trip you have, it's always good to be

home.

That's all right. You all don't have to talk to me.

I don't have to talk to you. You understand?

So if it's going to be like that, that's the way I prefer it, all right?

Of course, I'm no expert on these things, but it does seem to me that if a

person was driving a car and the gas gauge needle moved to letter E and the

little light came on, that surely this would be a clear indication to some

thinking individual that perhaps the gas tank is on empty.

First, I have to hear about this in the car for the last seven hours. Now I'm

going to hear about it in the house. And I told you that I know that when the

light goes... Goes on.

E. That I have another 15 miles.

We only went 12 miles.

The car owes me another three miles.

Your face is dead. It was empty.

It sputtered. It died.

And you killed him.

And everybody told you to get gas.

We passed three gas stations. We asked you. We begged you to get gas. No. All

you could say is 15 more miles. 15 more miles.

You know, the car would have made it if it wasn't for you all.

Yes.

First of all, when we took off, I told you not to take all that luggage. You

too much luggage, and then you went in and bought all those souvenirs, and

time you all went into a restaurant, you ate 12 ,000 pieces of food, you got in

the car, and you made the car too heavy. And you're lucky that it wasn't an

airplane, because in an airplane, when it's in trouble, They will jettison

everything off the plane that isn't absolutely necessary.

You understand me? I love you all. I'll let you stay in the car.

So you're saying you saved our lives?

Yes, I saved your lives because I love my family and I'm a wonderful person.

You're also very silly.

You all are not very nice to me after I brought you to safety.

I bet you, I bet you, I bet you any amount of money that I can drive that

15 miles if you all are not with me.

Denise, how was your weekend?

Tell the truth. You guys had a good time while we were gone, didn't you?

No, I didn't.

We hardly even noticed. Well, I can see you guys had a good time.

Grapes all over the floor.

To tell the truth, we wouldn't exactly be crushed if you went back to Mystic

Seaport and spent another night. I wouldn't drive these people from here to

mailbox.

Oh, please. You probably don't have enough gas to get there either.

Dad, did you run out of gas again?

Look, I want to talk to you about something.

Martin.

Yes, sir. The early navigators, my boy.

I bought some maps here.

Pull that out.

Now, look at how they charted.

And look at how they drew the world.

Now, Denise, check this out.

You can see that before they took off, this is their idea of what

the world looked like to them. You know, and so they just sailed around. And all

they did, actually, was just keep... They drove around

until they just bumped into some land.

So then they would get off the ship and go in and then see some natives or

something.

And look at where they have... Okay, now you'll

understand then.

Navy.

Excuse me for a second, Dr. Hudson.

Follow me.

Sit here and talk to myself.

Now, this is where they charted the courses, you see.

Okay,

sir. Give me those lips.

I think you better get out before I harpoon you.

Relax, relax.

Just a little bit of shark humor.

Oh!

Would you go?

Didn't we have the best weekend?

Yes, it was great.

Wouldn't you like it to be that way every time you came home? Of course.

Come on, let's get our own apartment.

Oh, now wait. When we had the chance to get base housing, you got cold feet.

I know, but that was a year ago. I wasn't ready then.

I'm ready now.

Well, you know I'm all for it.

But it's going to be at least another year before base housing opens up. No,

let's not wait for that. Come on, let's get an apartment here in Brooklyn.

Yeah!

room $1 ,500.

Honey, these prices are ridiculous.

No, I know.

But we gotta keep looking. We'll find a bargain. We are looking, and the best

thing we found is to sublet that woman's apartment and take care of her six

cats.

You know, I don't mind, because I like pets.

Honey, on our budget, we can't afford to feed them.

Huxtable residence?

Yes, yes, yes.

I'm the lady who called about that two -bedroom apartment.

mean by unique two -bedroom?

What? The other bedroom is across the street?

Okay, thank you.

What?

What does that mean?

Oh, look, Denise, I gotta go pick up Olivia, but let's not get discouraged.

are gonna find something within our means. And do you know why?

Why? Because we're Navy.

I'm a Navy man, you're a Navy wife, we have a Navy baby.

Just like the in your father's nautical maps. We got to keep going until we hit

land. After all, who was it that discovered the new world?

It wasn't the Air Force. It wasn't the Army. It was the Navy. The blue and

Say it with me now. Blue and gold. Blue and gold. Blue and gold. Navy.

Blue and gold. All right.

All right.

Now, what was that about?

I know that you all can stay here as long as you want.

Dad, it's time.

You know, Martin and I made up our minds.

It's just that the price is in these papers.

You're crazy.

Well, you want me to get you another paper?

You know, Martin and I want to get out of here.

It's just that we're trapped.

We're prisoners here until I don't know when.

It's not just in the papers, honey. There are other ways to find apartments.

What do you mean?

What I mean is, for instance, I know of a man who found an apartment, rent

control, eight -bedroom apartment for $75 a month.

Dad,

are you being for real? You got to get out. You got to talk to people. You talk

to the pizza boy whose father works in the boiler room. the room of a building

and knows the guy who delivers the paper to the 68 -year -old man who's been in

the apartment for 125 years and he wants to go to Florida. So he says he wants a

sublease and then you get it for 125 hours. You have to talk to people. You

to get out. You have to circulate.

Dad, wait.

What if you don't know a pizza delivery guy? Not just the pizza. You could talk

to anybody.

Wait for the pizza first. You've got to circulate.

Get yourself out there. There you go. All right, go get them. Go get them.

I'm just going to throw these papers out in the trash.

Maybe if I lock them out, they'll stay out.

Dr. October, why are Daddy and Denise looking for an apartment?

Oh.

They're looking for a new home for you.

What's wrong with where we are now?

Well, sooner or later, people have to find their own home. You know, it's sort

of like the law of nature.

Well, I'm going to live here forever.

That's right.

I want to grow up here, and I want to get married here.

No, dear, you don't want to do that.

Yes, so you and Mrs. Huxtable won't be lonely.

Trust me, Mrs. Huxtable and I will not be lonely.

I said we won't.

I mean, you don't realize how hard we've worked to try and get all of these

children out of this house.

I'm not leaving here. If you want to go, fine.

I'm not going anywhere.

This is my house.

Good. Then can we work together?

Well, I guess if you put it that way, what do you have in mind?

That I'll be a doctor just like you. Oh, really?

We'll see your office and we'll go to the hospital together where they grow

their babies.

We'll take your car, but I'll drive.

Well, you seem to have this all worked out.

Sure do. You deliver the babies, then you give them to me, then I'll take care

of them.

Mucho dinero.

Well, listen, you know my rule.

Anybody in this house that brings a paycheck can stay.

Deal, doctor.

Yeah,

you can stay here.

Matter of fact, you're the only one who can stay here.

Apartments, including this penthouse.

What? This thing that they call a penthouse is a converted pigeon coop.

Cinder block and plumbing on top of the building.

I don't understand the ads these people put in the newspaper.

And this was the best of the lot.

I'm sorry. I have two days left of my leave. I'm tired, and I would like to

visit with my daughter.

You weren't all that bad.

Yeah.

Hey, Denise.

I found a place. What? Where?

How much? Oh, I don't know. I was with some friends in Little Italy, and the

at the espresso stand was complaining about his wife's psychic.

See, she had predicted that they would move into this nice, cute place in

Brooklyn, but the espresso guy didn't want to move to Brooklyn, so it was

available. Now, she said that she saw something that was very unique and

cheap, and get this, in her vision, she almost saw a great view of the river.

Hey, here's the address.

Ah, this is great. You should go check this out. Perfect.

Thank you. Hey, you got it.

If Martin asks where I went, tell him I went to go find a place and to get my

palm read.

She almost saw a great view of the river.

Yeah, I think her vision was blocked by a big brick bake shop.

I told you about all that sugar, didn't I?

Pardon me, but this is not your room.

Yes, it is.

Excuse me, maybe I'm getting old or something, but the room that you're

to is down the hallway, I think. Here, let me refresh your memory. Sit down,

down. Here, help me.

True or false, when Theo moved out to go to college, you said that I was

supposed to get my own room. True.

But Denise and Martin moved in, And I'm in the room with Olivia.

True. But then you said when Vanessa went away to college, I was going to get

own room again.

True. But I didn't know that your cousin Pam was going to come and live with us.

Here, I'll make a deal with your dad.

See, if you give me this room... Yes?

I'll forget everything.

What is this?

It's a lease. Sign it. A lease for what?

For the room.

Do you have money for the rent?

Money? Think about it.

Okay, now, baby, the psychic said that this place is very special. The man who

owns this custom -designed the whole interior. Oh,

and he was a Navy man, so that's why I thought we would like you.

open mine.

So, according to the floor plan, oh, well, we're in the living room.

And I just do a little like this.

Here's our dining room.

This whispers Martin and Denise.

You know, honey, come on, it's not the amount of space we have. It's what we do

with it. You know, this will be our place.

We can hang a few pictures and we'll...

Get her a few plants around. It'll be a whole new thing.

What kind of thing?

You know, it's so weird. The psychic said this would be her first reaction.

Did the psychic also say that this would be my second reaction?

Hey, hey, come on. Wait now.

Martin, you're the one who told me to go out there and said we won't stop until

we hit land.

Well, what is this? This is land.

Okay, okay. You're right. You're absolutely right.

Show me the rest.

And I suppose that this is our wonderful kitchen.

Oh, dear, it's a galley.

You know, experts say that people walk an extra three miles because of the

inefficiency of the modern kitchen. I'll think of all the time that we will be

saving and that we could spend with Olivia.

Three children slept here. Yes. Where?

take a shower and then sit down on your stove.

Well, you guys should have seen our first place.

Oh, it was a beautiful home, wasn't it, Cliff? A large one -bedroom. Yes, it

was. Completely furnished. With a spiral staircase.

And a terrace.

Please.

See, your mother and I, newly married, decided that we would rent a house.

Went to the realtor. The man had drawings of five houseboats. We wanted

down a whole year's rent right in front of the man.

And then... We got to the houseboat around

10 .30 that night.

Had a lovely night.

Had a very short one.

I jumped up and ran to the window. I pulled back the curtain, and there was

whirling blade of a helicopter.

And the people are sitting this far away from us.

There's six people somewhere who know what your mother looks like.

So, you're still here.

didn't try now i have to go back up to that room and live

with that for you