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1
00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:08,820
This is the best elevator music I've
ever heard.
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00:01:19,100 --> 00:01:24,600
Yes, you have to see this. Olivia is
amazing. She's so smart.
3
00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:26,560
Okay, show it to me, whatever it is.
4
00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:29,600
Okay, Olivia, you've never seen this
book, right?
5
00:01:29,920 --> 00:01:32,340
Never seen it. And no coaching from me,
right?
6
00:01:32,780 --> 00:01:36,220
No coaching. Okay, Mom, keeping all that
in mind, will you please turn to any
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00:01:36,220 --> 00:01:38,120
page and pick a sentence?
8
00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:39,520
All right.
9
00:01:39,860 --> 00:01:42,180
All right, Olivia, I'd like for you to
read this sentence.
10
00:01:42,640 --> 00:01:43,640
You got it.
11
00:01:43,840 --> 00:01:47,920
The brown cow ate the green grass.
12
00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:52,320
Yes! Amazing! And every word correct.
And she's going to be four next month.
13
00:01:52,420 --> 00:01:55,280
Mom, have you ever seen any child,
including me, who could do this?
14
00:01:57,760 --> 00:02:01,180
Well, actually, when Vanessa was three,
she was getting...
15
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:05,300
But she was not nearly as good at it as
you are.
16
00:02:07,180 --> 00:02:09,560
You're a genius, you're a genius, you're
a genius.
17
00:02:09,940 --> 00:02:13,060
Okay, now, um, what sound does a cow
make?
18
00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:14,560
Moo!
19
00:02:15,940 --> 00:02:18,820
Is she amazing or what? She does
impressions too.
20
00:02:45,260 --> 00:02:48,180
We're having a We Survived the Chemistry
Exam celebration.
21
00:02:48,820 --> 00:02:49,900
Oh, that sounds like fun.
22
00:02:50,140 --> 00:02:52,660
And the party is for girls only. I mean,
we're not inviting guys because guys
23
00:02:52,660 --> 00:02:55,000
are jerks. But not all guys. I mean,
you're okay, Dr. Huxfield, but you're
24
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,920
really a guy. You're a man. You're
older. Well, not that you're an old man,
25
00:02:57,920 --> 00:03:00,580
you're not 16, which is what a guy is.
And I don't know what it is about that
26
00:03:00,580 --> 00:03:02,780
age for guys. I mean, because they don't
tell the truth, and they talk about
27
00:03:02,780 --> 00:03:05,340
sports, and they're into bods, nothing
else. And they're always talking about
28
00:03:05,340 --> 00:03:08,200
who you are and what you've done and
what you haven't done. I mean, that's
29
00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:10,580
they're jerks. And I hope Susan makes
them clam dip. I love clams.
30
00:03:27,820 --> 00:03:30,360
We watched all the videos. The rest are
just my parents' videos.
31
00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:33,600
Anybody want to see all quiet on the
Western Front? No.
32
00:03:34,460 --> 00:03:35,740
Jane Eyre? No.
33
00:03:36,220 --> 00:03:37,119
All right.
34
00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:38,039
Moby Dick.
35
00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:39,040
All right.
36
00:03:39,860 --> 00:03:43,060
Let's just forget about the videos,
okay? I can't believe you didn't make
37
00:03:43,060 --> 00:03:44,060
clam dip.
38
00:03:45,640 --> 00:03:46,640
I'm bored.
39
00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:47,840
Me too.
40
00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:49,160
What can we do?
41
00:03:49,860 --> 00:03:52,080
I know. Let's call up somebody.
42
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:55,120
Who are we going to call? We're all
sitting here.
43
00:03:58,920 --> 00:04:04,740
here is not to be bored right yeah girl
i know how we can have big fun yeah
44
00:04:04,740 --> 00:04:11,060
a whole new way to play the alphabet
game wait a minute no i'm not drinking
45
00:04:11,060 --> 00:04:17,019
susan i'm not allowed to drink oh well
you won't have to unless you lose i
46
00:04:17,019 --> 00:04:20,519
know i mean if my parents even smell
liquor on my breath they kill me vanessa
47
00:04:20,519 --> 00:04:24,340
your parents aren't here would you live
a little maybe i'll just get this one
48
00:04:24,340 --> 00:04:29,180
out and watch we're gonna do this we all
have to do it Get it. Yeah, she's
49
00:04:29,180 --> 00:04:30,180
right.
50
00:04:30,540 --> 00:04:31,540
Okay, I'm in.
51
00:04:32,260 --> 00:04:33,260
I'm in. Okay.
52
00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,760
Oh, Vanessa, you too.
53
00:04:36,840 --> 00:04:37,779
All right.
54
00:04:37,780 --> 00:04:40,980
All right, now, the rules of the
alphabet game are the same. We go
55
00:04:40,980 --> 00:04:43,920
alphabet and name a city for each
letter. Whoever breaks the rhythm loses.
56
00:04:44,340 --> 00:04:47,160
And when you lose... Bottoms up.
57
00:04:47,680 --> 00:04:48,680
Okay.
58
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:09,800
Washington is the city, D .C. is the
District of Columbia.
59
00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:02,720
Because my sister will pick me up.
60
00:08:03,180 --> 00:08:04,320
Okay, you just hurry.
61
00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:05,560
Okay.
62
00:09:02,440 --> 00:09:05,900
was bringing Vanessa home. Oh, yeah,
well, uh, care can't drive.
63
00:09:06,220 --> 00:09:07,420
Um, it's her battery.
64
00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:09,840
Dead.
65
00:09:12,620 --> 00:09:16,020
This is your favorite movie. I'll go
pick her up. What? No, no, no, Dad, this
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00:09:16,020 --> 00:09:18,580
isn't my favorite movie. See you guys.
I'm going to be behind. Talk to you
67
00:09:18,580 --> 00:09:19,580
later.
68
00:09:33,219 --> 00:09:39,380
I want to lie to him. Mom and dad are in
there. So we're going to have to go
69
00:09:39,380 --> 00:09:40,339
around back, okay?
70
00:09:40,340 --> 00:09:41,340
Back?
71
00:10:15,719 --> 00:10:18,340
I didn't even buy you any presents.
72
00:10:20,460 --> 00:10:21,419
It's okay.
73
00:10:21,420 --> 00:10:27,900
Is it funny? While you're in the
kitchen, would you please bring me some
74
00:10:28,260 --> 00:10:29,260
You got it.
75
00:10:35,500 --> 00:10:36,780
this thing with mayonnaise and mustard.
76
00:11:56,490 --> 00:11:58,990
It's your daughter's fault. Vanessa
didn't have to do what everybody else
77
00:11:58,990 --> 00:11:59,990
doing.
78
00:12:00,830 --> 00:12:02,970
Well, I'm sorry that it happened, too.
79
00:12:03,530 --> 00:12:04,710
Thank you for calling.
80
00:12:05,150 --> 00:12:06,150
Yeah, bye.
81
00:12:10,410 --> 00:12:12,230
Sammy Chips coming up.
82
00:12:12,730 --> 00:12:14,070
Sammy Chips.
83
00:12:15,490 --> 00:12:19,490
Angela Henning just called to say that
while she and her husband went out, her
84
00:12:19,490 --> 00:12:22,110
daughter and her friends, our daughter
included,
85
00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:27,200
decided to play the alphabet game while
chugga -lugging bourbon, and it seems
86
00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:30,220
that Vanessa was very drunk when she
left.
87
00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:32,500
She must have lost.
88
00:12:45,060 --> 00:12:49,340
We didn't know you brought Vanessa home.
89
00:12:54,090 --> 00:12:55,850
We just sort of, you know, went around
back.
90
00:12:56,070 --> 00:12:58,570
I see. What is that aroma coming from
those sheets?
91
00:12:59,330 --> 00:13:02,570
Huh? What is the aroma coming from the
sheets?
92
00:13:04,230 --> 00:13:09,170
Well, um... Okay, on the way home,
Vanessa got the flu, and she was going
93
00:13:09,170 --> 00:13:12,750
throw up in the car, but, you know, she
didn't. And when she got home, you know,
94
00:13:12,770 --> 00:13:19,190
she just... Well, if she has the flu,
then I better take a look at her now.
95
00:13:19,490 --> 00:13:21,670
Oh, no, Dad, you don't have to do that.
I already checked her.
96
00:13:22,910 --> 00:13:26,050
Yeah, uh... Because I learned first aid
in Africa, you know.
97
00:13:29,330 --> 00:13:30,670
That's your sister in there.
98
00:13:31,270 --> 00:13:32,850
But it's also our daughter.
99
00:13:33,390 --> 00:13:34,910
Why don't I just go wash these, Kate?
100
00:13:35,370 --> 00:13:37,190
Yes, why don't you do that? Okay.
101
00:13:40,550 --> 00:13:41,550
Daddy?
102
00:13:47,270 --> 00:13:49,170
Daddy? My head.
103
00:13:50,750 --> 00:13:51,750
My stomach.
104
00:13:52,490 --> 00:13:53,490
Please.
105
00:13:54,160 --> 00:13:55,160
Can you give me something?
106
00:13:58,660 --> 00:14:00,200
Nothing I can give you, kid.
107
00:14:00,580 --> 00:14:02,120
There's no cure for this.
108
00:14:04,320 --> 00:14:05,320
Vanessa?
109
00:14:07,580 --> 00:14:08,580
Vanessa?
110
00:14:09,860 --> 00:14:10,860
Vanessa?
111
00:14:14,660 --> 00:14:15,660
Vanessa?
112
00:14:24,570 --> 00:14:28,770
Vanessa! Vanessa, I'm talking to you.
Vanessa, your mother's talking to you.
113
00:14:30,490 --> 00:14:31,490
Vanessa,
114
00:14:32,950 --> 00:14:34,070
Mrs. Henning called.
115
00:14:35,350 --> 00:14:37,710
We know about everything that happened
at her house.
116
00:14:38,470 --> 00:14:39,470
Oh.
117
00:14:40,190 --> 00:14:43,190
We're not going to talk punishment,
honey, because I think you're learning
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00:14:43,190 --> 00:14:44,190
lesson right now.
119
00:14:44,350 --> 00:14:45,650
Oh, thank you.
120
00:15:17,900 --> 00:15:19,060
I'm eating a bowl of cereal.
121
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:24,240
You're supposed to be out of the house,
but you keep coming back here. You don't
122
00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:27,320
seem to understand what that means.
123
00:15:27,580 --> 00:15:30,900
You come here, you eat cereal, pork
chops, anything.
124
00:15:32,740 --> 00:15:36,360
You've been housing us for your own
apartment for 19 years, and now that you
125
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:38,000
have it, why are you always here?
126
00:15:38,320 --> 00:15:41,520
I'm not always here. I just came by to
visit you guys.
127
00:15:41,820 --> 00:15:46,840
Well, in that case, why didn't you come
up and see us before you started eating?
128
00:15:49,710 --> 00:15:53,890
I knew you guys were on your way down to
the kitchen eventually, so I figured
129
00:15:53,890 --> 00:15:54,930
I'd just meet you here.
130
00:15:56,350 --> 00:15:59,030
We came down here to eat ourselves.
131
00:16:00,790 --> 00:16:02,970
Okay. We ran out.
132
00:16:03,250 --> 00:16:04,250
Right, right.
133
00:16:04,630 --> 00:16:06,350
And by the way, I saw Vanessa this
morning.
134
00:16:06,790 --> 00:16:07,790
Oh, you did, huh?
135
00:16:07,930 --> 00:16:10,350
Yeah, I was upstairs in the bathroom
taking a shower.
136
00:16:18,730 --> 00:16:21,810
She was banging on the door telling me I
had to let her in because she was
137
00:16:21,810 --> 00:16:22,589
really sick.
138
00:16:22,590 --> 00:16:25,930
Vanessa and her friends decided to get
drunk last night.
139
00:16:26,270 --> 00:16:27,270
Whoa.
140
00:16:28,850 --> 00:16:29,850
Vanessa drunk?
141
00:16:30,250 --> 00:16:31,290
That's pretty severe.
142
00:16:31,730 --> 00:16:33,150
It took us by surprise, too.
143
00:16:33,410 --> 00:16:35,890
I never thought she would crack under
the pressure.
144
00:16:37,910 --> 00:16:38,910
What pressure?
145
00:16:39,210 --> 00:16:41,030
The pressure of growing up in this
family.
146
00:16:43,670 --> 00:16:48,380
See, you guys don't realize... what it's
like being a huxtable child.
147
00:16:49,280 --> 00:16:53,880
Because of what you two have achieved,
the whole world expects a lot more from
148
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:57,940
us than other kids. Let's face it,
there's nowhere else left for us to go
149
00:16:57,940 --> 00:16:58,940
down.
150
00:17:03,380 --> 00:17:04,800
So that's our fault.
151
00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:06,040
Think about it, Dad.
152
00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:07,480
You're a doctor.
153
00:17:08,180 --> 00:17:09,180
Mom's a lawyer.
154
00:17:09,859 --> 00:17:10,960
That's a lot of pressure.
155
00:17:11,260 --> 00:17:14,180
But we had never said to you, son,
become a doctor, become a lawyer.
156
00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:17,599
We say go to school, we say study, we
say become whatever you want.
157
00:17:17,839 --> 00:17:18,839
There you go.
158
00:17:19,380 --> 00:17:20,380
Pressure.
159
00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:24,540
Go to school.
160
00:17:25,180 --> 00:17:26,260
Become something.
161
00:17:27,619 --> 00:17:29,240
That's a lot of pressure, Mom.
162
00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:32,460
All my friends see it.
163
00:17:32,660 --> 00:17:35,600
Phil, when do you feel this pressure?
164
00:17:40,700 --> 00:17:41,900
Every now and then.
165
00:17:42,180 --> 00:17:43,740
This is not about pressure.
166
00:17:45,080 --> 00:17:49,780
Vanessa got drunk because she and her
friends were bored.
167
00:17:50,380 --> 00:17:55,060
Although they had television, VCR, video
cassettes, audio cassettes, books. And
168
00:17:55,060 --> 00:17:58,940
each other. Thank you. But they called
each other on the phone every five
169
00:17:58,940 --> 00:18:01,900
minutes when they were away. Yet they
were bored together.
170
00:18:02,260 --> 00:18:03,260
You see.
171
00:18:05,460 --> 00:18:10,940
So you see, Vanessa did not feel
pressure from us. The pressure she felt
172
00:18:10,940 --> 00:18:12,260
from the people she was with.
173
00:18:15,910 --> 00:18:16,910
Okay, Mom.
174
00:18:18,010 --> 00:18:23,390
And to show you that I'm an open -minded
person, I'm going to bring up what you
175
00:18:23,390 --> 00:18:25,710
said in my next discussion with the guys
about pressure.
176
00:18:27,150 --> 00:18:29,610
Thank you ever so much.
177
00:18:34,130 --> 00:18:35,130
Hi,
178
00:18:38,950 --> 00:18:39,950
Mom.
179
00:18:40,570 --> 00:18:41,570
How was school?
180
00:18:42,850 --> 00:18:43,850
Painful.
181
00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:48,740
I wish you hadn't made me go. I felt
sick all day. Oh, I'm so sorry that
182
00:18:48,740 --> 00:18:50,140
happened to you, my sweet.
183
00:18:51,140 --> 00:18:53,860
Come over here and sit down with me for
just a little while.
184
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:56,840
Mom, I'd really like to go to bed. No,
not yet.
185
00:18:57,120 --> 00:18:58,120
Clip, she's here!
186
00:19:14,380 --> 00:19:17,500
If you're going to play the alphabet
game, we want you to be good at it so
187
00:19:17,500 --> 00:19:18,219
don't lose.
188
00:19:18,220 --> 00:19:18,979
That's right.
189
00:19:18,980 --> 00:19:20,000
I'm playing, too.
190
00:19:20,220 --> 00:19:21,700
You? Yes, indeed.
191
00:19:21,940 --> 00:19:27,880
Starting her out young so she builds up.
We don't want her to cave in under the
192
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:28,880
pressure.
193
00:19:30,020 --> 00:19:31,020
Don't feel sick.
194
00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:33,900
Don't make me do this. I said I would
never drink again.
195
00:19:34,420 --> 00:19:35,640
I'll start with letter A.
196
00:19:35,860 --> 00:19:36,860
All right.
197
00:19:37,100 --> 00:19:38,100
Hey.
198
00:19:44,750 --> 00:19:45,750
No such city?
199
00:19:45,830 --> 00:19:49,370
Where is the city named Colorado?
Colorado, Wyoming.
200
00:19:49,750 --> 00:19:50,750
Go get the book.
201
00:19:51,130 --> 00:19:52,130
Colorado,
202
00:19:52,450 --> 00:19:53,730
Wyoming.
203
00:19:54,450 --> 00:19:55,450
You better chug along.
204
00:19:55,650 --> 00:19:58,370
But you know, I said it's a Colorado
city.
205
00:19:59,670 --> 00:20:01,410
Well, goodness gracious.
206
00:20:01,750 --> 00:20:06,250
Oh, you did this all night long, huh?
207
00:20:09,130 --> 00:20:11,230
Well, all right, boys, here they come.
208
00:20:33,710 --> 00:20:37,550
Listen, we don't, when you hesitate,
say, like that. There you go.
209
00:20:37,950 --> 00:20:40,870
There you go, chug -a -lug, chug -a
-lug, chug -a -lug. Let it not be said
210
00:20:40,870 --> 00:20:41,990
I could not play the game.
211
00:20:42,510 --> 00:20:46,230
Chug -a -lug, chug -a -lug, chug -a
-lug. Hit it, Big Mama.
212
00:20:46,970 --> 00:20:47,970
Yes,
213
00:20:50,370 --> 00:20:51,370
indeed.
214
00:20:52,470 --> 00:20:53,470
There we go.
215
00:20:53,830 --> 00:20:54,830
What's that?
216
00:20:55,690 --> 00:20:56,690
What's that a deal?
217
00:20:57,530 --> 00:20:58,530
You know why.
218
00:20:59,590 --> 00:21:00,590
Houston.
219
00:21:04,300 --> 00:21:06,080
No, no, Jay. No, ain't no Jay.
220
00:21:06,900 --> 00:21:12,120
Hey, the little people count, too. Dad,
you cannot make Rudy drink.
221
00:21:12,360 --> 00:21:13,860
Take your hands off me, please.
222
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:17,200
Dad, you can't. Hey!
223
00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:22,200
There you go, Sparty.
224
00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:32,820
No, no, no, no, no. Come on. No, no, you
lost. You lost.
225
00:21:35,020 --> 00:21:35,919
Look at me.
226
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:36,920
Anchor down.
227
00:21:37,860 --> 00:21:38,860
Anchor down.
228
00:21:39,940 --> 00:21:42,120
Go on. Hit it. Go, go, go.
229
00:21:42,640 --> 00:21:43,940
All right.
230
00:21:44,820 --> 00:21:45,220
I
231
00:21:45,220 --> 00:21:57,360
don't
232
00:21:57,360 --> 00:21:58,720
know, but I'll tell you what.
233
00:22:13,450 --> 00:22:15,270
That's the drink. Four drinks.
234
00:22:16,410 --> 00:22:17,410
There you go.
235
00:22:17,570 --> 00:22:18,870
Drink her down. Four shots.
236
00:22:19,070 --> 00:22:20,150
Four shots.
237
00:22:20,590 --> 00:22:21,710
That's the bonus way.
238
00:22:21,930 --> 00:22:22,930
Drink her down.
239
00:22:23,750 --> 00:22:25,090
Drink her down. Dad, look.
240
00:22:25,490 --> 00:22:29,030
I promise. I will never drink again. Why
are you doing this to me? You are
241
00:22:29,030 --> 00:22:31,870
stalling, Vanessa. Come on, honey. Chug
-a -lug like you did last time.
242
00:22:34,330 --> 00:22:38,590
Chug -a -lug. Chug -a -lug. Chug -a
-lug. Chug -a -lug. Chug -a -lug.
243
00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:44,780
Chug -a -lug, chug -a -lug, chug -a
-lug, chug -a -lug, chug -a -lug, chug
244
00:22:44,780 --> 00:22:46,380
-lug. All right!
245
00:22:46,660 --> 00:22:47,660
Hey!
246
00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:49,660
All right!
247
00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:53,240
This is cheap.
248
00:22:55,740 --> 00:22:56,740
Gotcha!
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00:23:42,540 --> 00:23:45,320
The casting show was taped for a studio
audience.
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