Original subtitles

Thank

you.

Thank you.

Goodbye, old water heater.

They just said we can't fix them anymore.

Been with us for 20 years.

Gave me and my family clean dishes, clean clothes, clean children.

So now you're going to the big basement in the sky.

Au revoir.

Yes, yes, well, I can't help it anymore.

Well, what is the bow for?

The bow is so that these men coming by will haul it away. What is the note for?

Read the note. You take this note and look at it.

Dear Mr. Sanitation Man, I put a bow on my water heater to make your day a

little sweeter.

Not many appreciate what you do, but I, for one, am a fan. True blue. Your

friend, Dr.

Heathcliff Huxtable.

Now, you know they're going to haul this away.

The only thing that needs to go in the garbage truck is your poem. Yes.

Well, how about if I put you out on the sidewalk with a bow around you? Nobody

will take you away.

Alfred, I remember the red and blue days when you stood for everything that I

love. Au revoir.

Au revoir.

Yes, honey.

This is the dress I'm wearing to Kelly's party, okay?

Okay, bye.

Just a minute, Rudy.

Yes, Mom?

Come here, please.

What for?

Just come here.

You know, just last month, we put that dress and all your summer clothes in a

trunk, and I told you it's getting too cold for you to wear them.

Yesterday it was hot. Well, I know, but yesterday was an unusual day. Today it's

52 degrees.

It's probably going to get hot when the party starts.

I don't think so, Rudy.

The weatherman said it's going to get colder, so why don't you take that dress

and put it back in the trunk?

But this is my favorite dress.

Can I wear it to the party, please?

I want you to dress warm.

I am warm.

Well, you're in the house.

But, Rudy, if you go outside dressed like that, you're going to catch cold.

I don't care, as long as I can wear my dress.

I'm sorry. The answer's no.

But I want to wear it. Well, I'm sorry, sweetie. You're not wearing it.

Yes, I am.

Lady, don't you talk back to me. A no is a no, understand?

But, Mommy, you're making me feel bad.

Oh, Rudy, if you don't listen to me, you're going to feel much worse.

Now take that dress, put it back in the trunk, and let's have no further

discussion about it, please.

I have one more question.

Yes, what is it?

Can I wear my dress to the party this one time, please?

No, upstairs now.

But, Mom... Rudy, if I hear one more word out of you, you're not going to

party.

I mean it.

Sanitation department?

Yes.

I'm from the Brooklyn Heights area.

I'm calling again.

Are any of your trucks broken down?

They're not? Well, they're running on time, yes?

Okay.

Because I left two bulk items out there.

Right. No more than four. I know that. I understand. By the way, I know I told

you this before, but I voted for the pay raise.

Yeah.

And I'm sorry you didn't get more.

Huh? Right, okay. You're welcome. Right.

What? Oh, God bless you, too. Yes.

Yes, God bless.

Ah, Roberto.

How are you? I came over to study with Vanessa. Yeah, well, she's not here

now because she went down to the... She went to the store.

I know. I came over an hour early.

So how's it going?

It's fine, Robert.

It's going good with me, too.

Good. Good.

Is this yours, Dr. Huxley? Yes, indeed. It's in my house. Oh, vintage.

Antique cars.

Uh -huh. Thinking of buying one of these? I'm thinking about a 1937 Aston

to fix it up.

Whoa, that could run into some serious money.

Well, I certainly hope not, Robert.

Dr. Archibald, can I ask you something? Sure.

Instead of buying this car, wouldn't it be better if you gave the money to

charity? Pardon me?

You already have a car, a nice car.

There are people in the world who can't even afford to buy roller skates. You

could really help them by giving them this money.

I mean, as a wise man once said, the value of money increases when it is

by many.

And another wise man once said, the person who gives away nothing has

give. Now, I know it's bold of me to be talking this way, but I feel that I can

because of the strength of our relationship.

Robert? Yeah.

Mrs. Huxtable and I give to the lower economic neighborhood free medical and

legal care.

We also make donations to different charities. Now, if I show you the

receipts... May I have my car, please?

Thank you.

Dr. Archibald? Yes, sir.

If you don't mind, I'd like to talk about my love life.

It's not in very good shape. The last few weeks, the girls I've wanted to be

with don't want to be with me.

Robert? Yeah? I really don't want to hear this.

I know. I know. It upsets me, too.

I think the problem that I'm having is when I'm with a girl, I go with my

feelings, but they go with their feelings.

It's a matter of fusion versus fission. Yeah. Hey, Robert, let me tell you.

Vanessa should be coming home just about now. So she's carrying a lot of bags

and she could use some help. She may even be tired. So what I'd like is for

to sit out on the front stoop out there and be on point. So when she comes, you

can grab those packages and help her. That's a good idea, but we won't be able

to finish our time. What I'm saying is that because of the strength of our

relationship, you can be sitting out there, you see, and whatever you're

thinking will come in and get me.

I hear you. Downtown.

Downtown. What is it?

Daddy!

Hey!

Is Mommy back from the store yet? Not yet, hon.

I want to show you something.

Okay.

Hi. Hi.

Do you think I look pretty in this dress?

I think you look gorgeous.

Today I'm going to Kelly's birthday party. Do you think I should wear this?

Of course you should.

How about the dresses?

Wear that one. There's no other dress as far as I'm concerned.

Then I'll wear it. Because you said so.

Because I said so. I said it's beautiful, okay?

I love you. I love you too.

Hey, dear.

Show... No.

Show Mom your dress. Go on, spin around. Look at this dress she's wearing to the

party tonight.

Come on, show Mom. Rudy, why are you in that dress?

Rudy, I told you specifically to take that dress and put it back in the trunk.

Now you are asking for it.

Daddy told me to wear it.

And don't try to use your father against me, okay?

Because he has no idea about such things.

I want you to take that dress off.

I want you to put it in the trunk. And don't think of defying me ever again. Do

you understand me?

Yes, Mama. All right, now go.

Now, Cliff, I don't understand how you could look at that dress and tell that

child that she could wear it on a day like today.

You have been in this house and there are three... daughters who have grown up

in your eyesight, were you not paying attention?

I paid attention, but I was tricked.

Why didn't you check with me first?

Because I don't know all the time to check. See, a lot of people... See, just

little while ago, if I'd have checked, it would have helped me not to let

in here.

But I can't check with the checker and the checker and the checker.

I'm sorry, you're right.

And from now on, you don't have to check with anybody.

Thank you. Except me.

Hey, Dick.

Hey, Robert.

I didn't know you were here.

Vanessa and I were studying, but she's changing now because we're going to the

mall. Want to come?

Well, I'm kind of into the paper right now.

Well, we can wait until you're finished.

Well, I'm sure by that time I'll be into something else. But you kids have a

good time. You know what's the most important trip I've ever made to the

There's this girl I'm really interested in, Joyce Barnett.

And Vanessa invited her to the mall, but what Joyce doesn't know is I'm coming

along to meet her.

Vanessa's fixing you up with the girl?

Yeah. Sort of in a crisis now.

Well, all my confidence. Every girl I've asked out in the last three weeks has

rejected me.

Boy, that must be rough.

I mean, I know you do a lot of asking out. Even when they say yes, it never

works out.

In the last two years, 23 girls have broken up with me.

One of three?

Actually, 22. I shouldn't count Linda Potter. See, her dad's in the Navy and

transferred. The whole family moved to Guam.

Wow, that's too bad.

Yeah, I didn't even find out until after he left.

Robert, all I want to know is, how do you deal with all this rejection?

Where are you storing all that misery?

It's got to go somewhere.

Don't worry, I'm not letting it build up.

A wise man once said, pain is like a lighthouse.

If you allow it into your heart, it'll guide you to shore.

Yeah, that's deep.

Thank you.

Okay, I'm ready.

Vanessa, you look fantastic.

Thank you.

Really, I mean that. It's impossible for you to look bad.

Do you think if Joyce and I don't work out, you and I could... No, Robert.

We're friends.

And I don't want to ruin our friendship by letting something like dating get in

the way.

That's why I'm introducing you to Joyce Barnett. I really think you're going to

like her.

Hey, Robert, who knows?

Maybe she's the lighthouse on the shores of the seas of your heart.

Wow. Can I use that someday?

It's yours.

Thanks. Come on, Robert.

Okay.

Hi, Rudy.

Hi, where are you going? To the mall.

It's summer.

So? We're not allowed to wear summer things in the fall.

I'm putting on a jacket.

Did Mom say it's okay?

Rudy, I don't have to have Mom's permission. I can wear what I want.

She tells me what to wear.

That's different.

Why? Because you're eight years old.

You don't know enough yet, so you have to be told what to do. It's for your own

good.

Okay, I'll see you later.

Bye.

I know enough. She doesn't know anything.

She's dumb.

Hey, Rudy.

Are you going to say hi to your brother?

No. All right, fine. If anybody needs me, I'll be a line accountant.

Is that what you're wearing?

Well, yeah.

You got to pick those clothes out yourself, didn't you?

Sure, why?

It's not fair.

What's not fair?

You get to wear whatever you want and do whatever you want. I don't get to do

anything.

Rudy, I wasn't always allowed to do whatever I want.

You know, I went through years of being treated like a little kid, but now I'm

17.

My senior year in high school.

I'm practically an adult.

Plus, I get free room and board.

Rudy, one day you will have it just as good, but you have to wait your turn.

Be cool hanging there. It's only nine more years.

Later.

It's not that easy being green.

Having to spend each day the color of the leaves.

When I think it could be so much nicer being red, yellow, or

gold. Or something much more colorful like that.

Lord, it's not easy being green.

It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary

things.

And people tend to pass you over because you're not standing out like

flashy sparkles on the water.

Stars in the sky.

You know green is the color of spring.

Yes, and green can be cool and friendly like.

an ocean.

Oh, you're part like a mountain, part like

a tree.

Yeah, and green is all there is to be.

Well, it could make you wonder why.

And I think it's what I...

They wouldn't take my water heater away.

I'm sorry.

What's the matter with you?

I'm little.

And when you're little, you're nothing.

So you're nothing?

I am a big nothing.

Well, if you're nothing, then I can't see you.

And if I can't see you, then I couldn't do like this.

You know what I mean?

You see?

Huh? Yes. And if you were nothing, then you wouldn't be laughing.

No,

this is depressing.

I wonder what we can do to make life better.

pulling that one on me again.

Oh, indeed.

Mom got pretty upset with me. She sure did. And how is it that you try to get

in trouble like that?

I was gotcha good, too.

Yeah, because you're a crook. I'm not a crook. You are a crook. And let me tell

you something else. You don't seem to understand that when you trick me like

that, then I have to go into the room and Mom is there and Mom talks to me

all... night long. Why didn't you check with me and you check with me and you

check and you check and you check and you're in your room. The next time you

that to me, you're going in the room with mom and I'm sleeping in your bed.

I'm sorry.

Good.

At least you get to pick out your own clothes.

I think I have one of the greatest all -time ideas.

What? Go get up on this step.

Okay.

You jump on my back and I'll tell you the idea.

Ah! We're going to go up to your room and we're going to pick out some

Fall clothes, mind you. Not summer clothes, not spring clothes, but fall

that make moms happy.

Hi, Theo.

Hey. So, how'd it go at the mall?

Well, I met Joyce Barnett.

And? And we hit it off great.

All right. And then we broke up.

It's true. The fastest breakup in history.

Robert, Joyce couldn't handle commitment.

You came on too strong.

I introduced him. He said hello, and he asked her out to the senior prom.

Robert, that's three years away. I don't have a date for the senior prom.

Hey,

the troops are here. Just the people I want to see.

What's up?

Stay right there. Claire?

Yes? Will you come out, please, dear?

Are you okay?

No, it's fine. I want you to see something.

Watch this.

We present the Rudy Huxtable Fall Ensemble, created by the internationally

famous House of Rudy.

As you can see, we have the blue stockings, which are playing against the

turquoise skirt.

And as she is patrolling there, we have the dinosaur, which is a diurnamous sort

of thing, which envelops around the black and the purple.

low, low moccasin loafers, which are the thing this year.

And so, with our ensemble, we know that Miss Rudy is certainly saying, I

am autumn, I am love.

Rudy,

you look gorgeous.

Thank you. May I have the pleasure of escorting you to your party?

Then, shall we? We shall.

Mommy,

I'm sorry about what I did. You were right. I was wrong.

Apology accepted.

before a studio audience.