Original subtitles

I bet we've been together for a million years.

And I bet we'll be together for a million more.

Oh, it's like I started breathing on the night we hid.

And I can't remember what I ever did before.

What would we do, baby, without her?

What would we do?

You know, we beat Windsor Elementary today in field hockey. That's terrific.

Jennifer, how'd you do? Hey, Dad, have you been following what's been happening

in the stock market lately?

I mean, they say that $1 ,000 is going to be the base for the future.

I mean, can you picture a market with a Dow base of $1 ,000? I grow lightheaded

at the very thought.

I was talking, Alex. Do you mind?

Oh, sorry, Jennifer.

Windsor hasn't lost a game since 1911, and they still have the same coach.

Look, Dad, I've been making a killing on paper every day. I mean, I have a knack

for picking what's going to go up and when to get out on a good profit. Alex,

charting those stocks is just a school project.

They're thinking of firing the coach now.

I know it's a cool project. That's what's killing me.

Mr. Matthews, down at the brokerage house, he keeps recommending my tips to

clients. Can we talk about something else here? Alex has monopolized the

conversation all night.

All right, what do you want to talk about, Mallory?

Do you have some keen insight for us about lipstick?

Alex, your sister has a point. Enough with the stock market.

Let's hear about some other things that are going on in the world.

Mel?

Well, they have come up with this new lipstick you can just pencil on.

Want to go back to the stocks, Dad?

Alex, I'm not investing one cent. It's out of the question.

Dad, you're missing a golden opportunity here.

It's like taking candy from a baby.

Brings back memories.

Elise, are you finished?

I'm sorry, sweetheart. This project isn't working and it's making me crazy.

I think I have the first recorded case of architects blocked.

What's the problem, Mom?

Well, I'm designing a chapel for the university, and the problem is that

from many different religions are going to use it. Why is that a problem?

Well, I'm not sure how to allot the space.

I mean, like, if I have four separate altar areas, then half the time, only a

fourth of the people will be facing the minister of their choice.

What about revolving pews?

I'll work on it some more.

I've been following this one stock here, Secundo Tin. Uh -huh. It's going to

triple at least, but we have to get in on it now.

I told the broker we'd call him at home. No way, Alex. You've got to understand

the stock market is a very complex, unpredictable thing.

My own experience with it has been rather... We lost a bundle.

It'll be different this time. All you have to do is reopen the account. I'll

handle it from there.

All the account consists of it. The 50 shares of AT &T my father gave us for a

wedding present. We're not going to risk that.

The phone company.

Where is the challenge?

Mallory alone keeps the phone company in business.

Alex, Alex, no.

Mom, it's now or never.

The condo tin is going to be the next McDonald's.

I'm with your dad on this. I'm sorry if you think we're being unreasonable.

Hi, I'd like to speak to Mr.

Matthews, please.

Hi, Mr. Matthews?

Is this Stephen Keaton?

Yes, Alex Keaton's father.

Yeah, I'd like to reopen my account and purchase 100 shares of Secundo Tin at

the opening bell.

Pardon me for a moment.

Alex, you're not dead. That's plagiarism.

Just be quiet for a minute, Jennifer. I can explain all this.

I could be quiet, Alex.

Chew on this, then.

Uh, sorry to keep you waiting, sir. Just some, uh, prowlers at the back door.

Yeah, that's right.

Reopen my account and purchase 100 shares of Secundo Tin.

Just use that AT &T stock as collateral.

All right, thank you. Good night.

Jennifer, this isn't as bad as it seems.

I'll be the judge of that.

What you've just witnessed was done for Mom and Dad's own good.

I mean, their anniversary is coming up.

Don't you think they'll be surprised when I give them a nice, big,

check? I mean, everybody's gonna come out of this a winner.

I know I will.

Right, turn over those 500 shares of Overdine we bought.

Right, and all of the genetic stuff.

Put everything we have into VIP.

Well, thank you.

Actually, it was the wife's idea.

Uh, that'll be it for today. Bye.

I suppose you're wondering what that phone call was all about.

Not at all.

How's the little woman?

Uh, Mom, I was just working on my school project.

That's how I was pretending to buy and sell some stocks there.

Pretending to be grown up with a family and a dog to lend some authenticity to

the project, that's all.

Humor me.

I've been doing that for 17 years, Alex.

Did you have a nice run?

Well, it was okay.

I thought I'd clear my mind, but I still haven't come up with any ideas for the

chapel. Oh, well, don't let it get to you.

Well, it's hard not to.

I mean, I know I'm a good architect, but suddenly I cannot come up with a simple

solution to an easy problem.

It just shakes my confidence. It makes me feel like I don't know what I'm

Ever felt like that?

No.

Mom, we're really going to have to talk about this exercise kick you've been on

lately. It's killing me.

Yeah, I sort of took a shortcut.

You mean you didn't go all the way around the park?

She didn't even go all the way around the house.

Hey, everybody.

Oh, how's the market doing, Alex?

Well, starting with 100 shares of Secundo Tin, I parlayed $500 into $3

Then I opened a margin account, and I made 20 % return in three days. Then I

bought options on a South American oil well, made more than triple value in

three weeks, and put everything I have... $10 ,800 into VIP.

I'm heavily margined, but it's double the chance for profit.

That's very nice.

I forgot what I asked you.

What is VIP?

Video Industries of the Philippines.

Maybe you should go there and check out your investments.

Go with it, Alex. I've got to say I admire your spirit. It's great to see

excited about a school project.

I'm excited about his project, too.

I've got an early meeting down at the station. I'll grab a bite there.

Okay. Have a good day, baby. Oh, boy. Here they go.

I'm sorry, Mallory. We'll say goodbye at the car.

I'm in no hurry.

Guys, make breakfast.

Now that my workout's over, I think I'll go change.

I hope I don't stiffen up.

Sounds like we're doing okay, partner.

Jennifer.

I've turned $500 into $10 ,000. I can't believe how hot I am.

How much is my cut so far?

$1 ,000 for your college fund and $50 for a new bike.

Not bad, just for keeping quiet.

And Mom and Dad will see things differently when I give them that check

their anniversary.

I'm going to take them down to the brokerage house tomorrow and surprise

Alex, Mom and Dad can't be bought off. They're not like you and me.

We're talking about thousands of dollars here, Jennifer.

Of course a little cash always puts a new perspective on life.

Hi. How are you? Hi, Mr. Matthews.

Oh, hi, Alex. I'll be with you in just a second. I'm having some trouble with

the computer here. It keeps jamming.

Circuits must be down.

Oh, have you tried this?

Okay, sometimes you have to clear it during this phase, or it's a real pain.

I knew that.

Look at that transalloyed upper point.

That Petravco up two and a half, it's terrific.

Yeah, it's terrific.

You're as hot as a pistol, Alex.

You got the mightiest touch, buddy boy.

Well, I'm glad I talked my dad into investing.

Oh, and that setback with VIP?

Well, regrettable is certainly understandable.

Excuse me.

What's back with VIP?

Uh, Mr. Matthews, what was that you just said about VIP?

Well, there was a typhoon in Manila last night. Millions in damage, stock

dropped 28 points. Excuse me, Alex.

Uh, are you sure?

About what?

About the typhoon, the stocks. Are you sure?

Of course I'm sure. I'm surprised you didn't know about it. What am I, a

weatherman?

I've been in school all day. I'm a kid.

That's right. I forget sometimes.

Alex, take it easy. So it's dropped 28 points.

He bought it at 29.

All he has to do is meet the margin call by closing tomorrow.

How much is a margin call?

$2 ,700.

That's no big deal.

Uh -uh.

Excuse me, Alex. I've got some customers to take care of.

That's not good for business, Alex.

Look, Mr.

Matthews, those people out there are my parents.

My dad doesn't know about the typhoon or the margin call. Look, Alex, the way

your dad plays the market, he understands that a $2 ,700 margin call

end of the world.

Yeah, well, let me just tell him in my own way, okay?

You don't understand. He takes these things very hard.

When he was a boy...

A typhoon wiped out his village.

Okay, Alex, if he's going to take the news anywhere close to the way you're

taking it, maybe you're right.

He

found

it.

Great. Come on in.

Alex, what's going on here?

This is a brokerage house. They buy, they sell.

Alex, you just slammed the door on us.

Yeah, well, I didn't want you to come in until everything was just right.

Clean up that desk, will you?

Why did you want us to come down here? What was all this talk about an

anniversary present?

Yeah, well, I just thought this would be the best place to give it to you.

Happy anniversary, Mom, Dad.

I love you.

making such a big deal about this.

Alex, this is not an ordinary afternoon.

You tell us to meet you at a brokerage house to give us an anniversary present.

When we get there, you slam the door in our faces, give us some guy's Rolodex,

and send us on our way.

I admit we're not the busiest people in the world, but there are better ways to

spend a day.

Look, I might as well tell you the truth.

I've tried everything else, Alex.

Yeah, well, I'm sorry to have gotten you down there under false pretenses, but

I've been trying to get you to invest for a couple of weeks now. And I figured

once you got down there, you know, the excitement of the place, the roar of the

ticker tape, the smell of the crowd, you'd catch the fever.

I mean, obviously it didn't work.

I didn't want it to be a total loss, so I gave you the Rolodex.

I don't want to hear anything else about investing, okay? We're not interested.

And, uh, that's final.

Well, you, uh, can't blame me for trying.

Oh!

Oh!

Hey, Alex, how did Mom and Dad like their present?

Oh, there was no present, Jennifer. There was a typhoon in Manila.

Millions of damage. The stock went way down.

If I don't come up with $2 ,700 by tomorrow, they're going to sell Mom and

stock. Wow.

So much for my life.

So much for my bike.

Jennifer, I need help. I'm desperate.

And please, don't say I told you so.

I won't.

I knew it.

I knew it.

Hi, Red Cross?

Yeah, um, what would I get if I donated a pint of blood?

No, in addition to the lollipop.

Oh. How about a gallon?

Alex, I can let you have $18 .11.

Thanks, Jennifer.

Now all I need is another $2 ,600.

Do you think Dad would be suspicious if I asked for a $2 ,600 advance in my

allowance?

Jennifer, let's try to be discreet about this. We're trying to keep this from

Mom and Dad, remember?

Right. I mean, this is just between you and me, right?

Right.

So, Alex, what are you going to do? Sell your soul to the devil or your body to

someone who's near -sighted?

Jennifer.

Sometimes when you keep a secret all to yourself, you get a real bad headache.

Yeah, but I'm the one who's got the headache.

Look, Alex, as painful as it may seem, I think the only thing to do here is tell

the truth.

To Mom and Dad?

What, are you crazy?

I meant to the broker. Maybe the two of you could work something out.

I still don't see why I have to be here, Alex.

For sympathy, Jennifer.

It's hard to say no to someone when they're holding hands with their ten

-old sister.

Want me to look?

No, just look cute and be bubbly.

Hi,

Mr. Matthews. Hey, Alec, how are you?

Fine. Uh, Mr. Matthews, this is my little sister, Jennifer.

Isn't she sweet?

Not really good with little kids.

Nice car, Alex.

What? Look what's going on, Alex.

Hey, did you fax up a point?

Brickhouser up two and a half. That's terrific.

Everything you've recommended.

Incredible as always. My clients have been making a killing.

So I guess you owe a lot to Alex.

You could look at it that way.

We are.

Listen, uh, did you bring the check from your dad?

Uh, Mr. Matthews, I need a favor.

Well, I'll be glad to help if I can.

Well, you know, I never should have bought that VIP stock.

Oh, I get it. You're feeling guilty because you advised your father to buy a

stock and it went down.

Well, that's part of it.

I feel that way, Alex.

Sometimes even I recommend stocks that go down. Sometimes people get burned.

I can't allow myself to become emotionally involved, and neither can

We're kind of old -fashioned.

We are emotionally involved with our father.

Matthews, let's say, just for fun, that my dad ran a little short of cash.

Let's even go so far as to say that he can't come up with the money to cover

stock.

Now, you know me. We have a relationship, right? Very good

Since we have such a good relationship, and you know my dad and I wouldn't let

you get stuck.

I mean, we'd come up with that money as soon as I...

We could.

Now, considering our friendship and all that I've done for you... This isn't

very good news, is it?

No, it's not.

We invested everything we had with you, our life savings.

We knew there would be risks going in. We discussed that.

But we're retired people.

There's no way that we can re -earn what we've lost.

We'll lose our house, our car.

Isn't there anything you can do?

Sorry.

Say hi to Dad.

Alex!

Alex!

What was it you wanted?

I did it. I never thought I'd finish this chapel.

You've got to have faith, Elise.

All the different religions have been satisfied. I just have that one little

blank space down there. That could be the agnostics lounge.

Complicated? Why are there three levels?

Conceptually, it's similar to the Citadel of David in Jerusalem.

That doesn't help me, Mom.

Okay, let me tell you about this in terms you'd understand.

Have you ever seen Hollywood Square?

Now, the basic design of the chapel is going to be multi -layered. Each faith

will have its own room on one of three levels, much like the celebrities on

Hollywood Square.

Over here, where Charlie Weaver usually sat, we'll have the Unitarian.

And over here in a January spot, the Jews.

Right up here in the center, the Catholics.

Where Rosemarie used to sit.

This is wonderful, Elise. Why do all the rooms have these connecting doors?

In case anyone wants to convert.

Hey, kids.

Uh, listen.

I've got to talk to you guys.

I did it, Alex. I finished the chapel. All my problems are over.

Not so fast, Mom.

Now, why don't we go upstairs?

Now would be a good time to... Yeah, you don't have to convince me. I'm with

you.

Alex, what's wrong?

Remember that Philippine video stock I was so high on?

I'm not so high on it anymore.

A typhoon wiped out the company.

Well, it looks like it wiped you out, too.

Yeah, well, that's true. I had all my money on that stock.

Well, it can't affect your grade that much. It was such a little stock.

So now you get a B -plus instead of an A.

I sense that there's more to this story, Elise.

Yeah, well, there is.

I, uh... I kind of called the broker.

And I kind of told him...

That I was you.

And I kind of bought some stock with my money.

I was going great, so I bought some more stock.

And some more.

And I was heavily margined. Well, there's a margin call.

And if I don't have $2 ,700 by 4 o 'clock, they're going to sell your AT &T

stock.

Alex,

let me get this straight.

You lied to us. You went behind our backs.

You pretended you were me, and you spent money that wasn't yours.

You make it sound so bad.

Alex, I can't even believe you had the nerve to do this.

Well, I guess I just got carried away.

You know, the buying and the selling and the action.

The excitement.

We've heard enough about your thirst for excitement. You're a high school

student, Alex, not a flying Walenda.

What a jerk I was.

Here I was, acting like I had all the answers.

Like I was perfect, like I was infallible.

Well, I'm not, and I know that now.

I guess that realization is punishment enough, huh?

Not even close.

I can't blame you.

I'm sorry, I really am.

Stephen, what are we going to do? Are we going to let him sell the stock, or are

we going to come up with the money to cover it?

Well, as someone who knows the market, it's my opinion that... Alex!

I'm going to give the broker the money and hold on to the stock.

That's just what I was going to suggest.

Elise, why don't you get a check over to the broker? I'll go down to the bank

and cover it with savings.

Do you want me to go with you?

I want you to stay right where you are.

And you might as well get real comfortable because you are not leaving

for the next six months.

And this is just the beginning.

No movies, no dates.

Sounds fair. And no TV.

Not even Wall Street Week?

Especially not Wall Street Week.

Come on, Dad. I didn't kill a guy.

Alex, I'm out $2 ,700.

I am the major investor in an underwater video company in the Philippines.

They probably have a picture of me in one of their huts with the caption, Our

Founder.

You're lucky to be getting off that easy.

Listen, just in case, I mean, if the thought does go up, we're in this 50

right?

Sit, Ubu, sit.

Good dog.