All language subtitles for The Cosby Show s05e14 Mrs. Huxtable Goes to Kindergarten

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Original subtitles

Okay, straight back.

Oh, careful not to scratch the door.

Watch your fingers.

Okay, okay.

Why don't you put it down right there.

There we go.

In with the new, out with the old. Let's go, Jerry. Now, you know where this is

going. Yeah, 1268 Hudson.

Right, the Thibodeau. Yeah. That's my sister and brother -in -law's place.

get the couch and the chair. Gotcha.

Let's go.

Oh,

and my mom wanted me to give you this.

Oh, thanks. Thanks a lot.

Don't leave. I also have a box of some of Sandra's old things.

Pardon me. What's going on?

We brought you a new couch. We're taking this old couch to Thibodeau. I don't

know anything about this.

Yeah, new couch ordered by Mrs. Huxtable.

You Mr. Huxtable?

Doctor. All right, well, we'll see you later, Doc. No, no, no, no, no. No,

that back in. Hey, hi, hon. Hey. Bring it back.

How do you like the new couch?

Yeah, I'm fine, but put that down here.

Is it staying or is it going?

No, this is staying, so just put it down. It's going.

No, no. Mom said the old couch goes.

Yeah? Well, you're going to go. Here, put that down there, please.

Look, she's only doing what her mother told her to do. I beg your pardon?

Thank you. Thank you.

I'd better call Mom and tell her about this. Right. Call your mother. Call her

every day. Call her all day long.

Call her.

Tell me that somebody's going to move something and I didn't give any

permission. I'm a half -interest owner in this place also. You understand what

I'm saying? This has been my sofa.

I've watched black and white westerns from this sofa. Gone to sleep. It has

cuddled me. You understand what I'm saying? This, I don't know. I don't know

this. This is going to stay. And if you have any trouble with Mrs. Huxtable, you

just say, your husband said for us to leave it. All right? All right. This is

for you.

Thank you. And this is for you. Thank you. You'll take this.

Hey, you're a real sport, Doc. Thank you a lot. Take care, fellas.

Have a good day. Take care of yourself.

Don't worry. I'll fix the door.

All right. Take care.

Thanks, Doc. Yes, indeed.

I so forgot.

Couldn't reach Mom. She's on her way home. Well, fine. Let it be that.

I'm looking at this thing. This may be all right for some people.

It'd be fine for you and Rudy to jump on, you know.

But I'm talking about life.

I tried to separate us.

It's here.

Oh, I love it. It looks better than it did on the showroom floor.

What is this?

Mom, I really tried, but Dad overruled you.

I just have a patient at 4 o 'clock, honey. That's why I scheduled the

for now.

And thank goodness that my patient canceled, or else I would not have been

to see my wife stab me in the sofa.

We can discuss this later. I have news for the whole family. See y 'all!

couch chain.

It's nice.

Hey, my son, sit with me on the old sofa.

When are we getting rid of this old thing?

This is a cold -blooded house.

Okay, the news is I'm going to be on television.

Retrospective. Never heard of it. It's a political panel discussion where

intelligent people get together and talk about history.

It comes on at 8 o 'clock in the morning, Rudy, and it doesn't have

it who says, where are you going?

Intellectual men who sit around and say, well, I believe that the aforementioned

statement has very little to do with the cohesive.

Yeah, I know the show.

They have the same three guys every week. How'd you get on? They want a new

panelist. They want to liven things up, and if it works out, I could be there

every week.

Now, look, all I'm saying is just watch out, because you and I have watched that

program, and you know how those three get with each other. They are some nasty

little men when they want to be.

Well, you forget who you're talking to, honey.

I've gone up against some of the nastiest attorneys in this city.

Now, I can hold my ground.

Ooh, go, Mom.

Come on, you guys. Let's go make dinner for our TV star.

This is the set.

And there's the three wise men.

Probably engaged in some deep philosophical discussion at this very

Phil, that is truly an incomprehensible statement. How could a man of your

intelligence reach such a ludicrous conclusion? I'm sorry, but I stand by my

opinion. I believe the Celtics are going to beat the Knicks in the Garden Town.

You're both whistling in your hats. The only important issue is which team can

whip the Pistons.

Hi,

we're starting in one minute. Your seat is on the left.

Okay. Dr. Huxtable, you can watch the show from the green room. There's coffee

and donuts.

Ah, donuts.

All right.

Donuts. No donuts. Right. All right. Break a brain.

Please get somebody in there quick to hide the donuts.

Will do. Thank you.

Gentlemen, we're ready to start.

This is our new panelist, Claire Huxtable. I'm Phil Kensington. Hello.

Benedict. Hello. Ian Trogette.

Hello. I feel like I know all of you because I watch the show every week. I'm

glad to know someone wakes up at 8 o 'clock Sunday morning.

You must be the one person who keeps showing up in our ratings.

Ten seconds.

Quiet, please.

In five, four, three, two...

Ah, good morning and welcome to

Retrospective. the weekly program that explores historical events from an

economic, social, and political perspective.

I am your host, Ian Traugott.

This week we examine the Great Depression, the bleakest of times on the

landscape. Was it an aberration in the natural fiscal cycle, or was it an

economic inevitability?

To examine this question, we are joined by our regular panelists, Mason

Benedict, noted author, essayist, and consultant to the Institute of National

Conservatism. Philip Kensington, author of the story and founder of Americans

for Democratic Reform.

And for the first time in our show's history, we're introducing a new

Claire Huxtable, attorney and partner in the corporate law firm of Green Tree,

Bradley, and Dexter.

Welcome. Hi. Hi.

I'm very happy to be here. I'm Hector.

How are you? Nice to meet you. I'm here to make sure that you don't eat the

donuts.

And, lady, who would like to be the first to journey into the abyss of the

Depression? Well, Ian, first of all, you're... question was half -baked. The

Depression was not an aberration or an inevitability. It was just a self

-corrective event in the history of our economy.

That's it. Mason, Mason, a simple answer from a simple mind. How can you refer

to something as self -corrective when 24 % of the labor force was thrown out

into the streets and children were on city sidewalks telling apples for a

nickel? Well, Phil, I can say once again you're going to sweep us through

history in a canoe of tears.

When will you liberals face up to the fact that Franklin Roosevelt kept this

depression going with suffocating regulations and socialist programs like

WPA, the PWA, the CCC, and the NRA.

I think it was all a lot of B -O -L -L.

I thought the presence of a lady would encourage these gentlemen to be more

civil with one another, but I guess not.

It's all right. I'm the mother of five. I'm quite accustomed to uncivil

behavior.

Mr. Benedict, you mentioned the NRA, the National Recovery Administration.

I think we can't begin to discuss the Depression unless we examine the

ramifications of the Supreme Court decision of 1935, which declared the NRA

unconstitutional.

She's cooking, isn't she? Rice and beans.

implications of that Supreme Court decision. Let's not overestimate the

Court decision. We have to focus on the important issue here. All right, I think

that this is an important issue. The only reason that there was a depression

this country was that 5 % of the population in 1929 held one -third of

wealth. If it hadn't been for the hysterics of the liberals, it would have

over in six months. If I may interject here, don't you think that's being a

little bit overly optimistic, six months? Now, nobody has addressed what

considered to be a major factor the nation's flawed banking structure

had nothing to do with that you're all sending up smoke screens it was a

business downturn an exhaustion of labor and resources that led to the bus well

actually that's not true pardon me in 1929 there were more than enough raw

materials to maintain the current rate of production do you have a source to

back that up as a matter of fact i do the great crash by john kenneth

Well, I read Mr. Galbraith's book, and I'm afraid you're wrong. I don't think I

am. Ian, you have a copy of the Galbraith book in your office, don't

here. Great. Why don't we get it and look it up? You'll only be sorry if we

the book.

I want the book.

I see that it's time for a commercial break.

We'll be back in a minute.

You know what? These are jeans.

Uh -huh.

Is the key on that ring able to open the door to where the book is?

Yeah. Ah, my wife wants the book. I don't know where the room is. Oh, let's

Let's go. Come on. You lead the way. Lead the way. Follow me.

Underlay.

We're still on a commercial break. We'll be rolling tape in one minute.

Claire, may I call you Claire?

Of course.

If we had time to get the book, I'm sure I would be proven correct. There

weren't enough raw materials in 1929 to maintain production. There were enough

raw materials, and that's in Galbraith's book.

Mrs. Huxtable, I think we've made it clear. There is no time to get the book.

Who are you?

Here we have it. The Great Crash by John Kenneth Galbraith. Fine. Now we can

straighten this out.

Chapter 9, gentlemen, page 173.

All right, here it is. Raw materials in 1929 were ample for the current rate

of production.

Wow. That has very little effect on my argument.

Really? It seemed to me you were placing great emphasis on that point.

I was not. You weren't listening. Here we go. In 5, 4, 3, 2...

Welcome back to Retrospective.

As it turns out, Mrs. Huxtable is correct.

There was ample raw material to maintain production in 1929.

It appears that our esteemed colleague, Mr. Benedict, is fallible. I've been

aware of his being fallible for 12 years.

Let's get serious again.

Yes, let's. I'd like to go back to what we were discussing prior to the

commercial break.

Yes, that is the banking structure of this nation in 1929.

Oh, come on now. We've beaten that into the ground. I agree there are much...

bigger fish in the ocean.

I think we should explore the relationship of the stock market crash

the Great Depression. Mason?

Absolutely no relationship whatsoever.

They're about as related as the French Revolution as to French fries.

My colleague's brain, I'm afraid, has become French fried.

Mason? It's my turn.

Oh, did you want to add something? Yes, I would like to add here that

The Depression was still ravaging the nation when the stock market began to

recover. In my opinion, the crash was a precipitating event.

That is the most ridiculous thing I ever heard. Oh, now, I wouldn't call her

opinion ridiculous. A bit naive, perhaps.

My opinion is neither naive nor ridiculous. And how the Sam Hill do you

to have a discussion if all points of view are not taken into consideration?

I believe it's time for a commercial break. We just took a commercial break.

We're taking another one. We'll be right back.

Beer.

Ian, why did you take a commercial? Because I wanted to. But you're not

scheduled to. I felt things were getting out of control and I wanted to put a

stop to it. Ian is right. We have to have order here. She was disrupting the

flow. I was trying to become part of the conversation. But there she goes again.

Frankly, Steve, I don't think this new panel is working out.

Ian, you know the station management is concerned about our low ratings. We're

trying to broaden our viewers.

Fine. Then let her speak when we get to the black topics.

Excuse me? The black topic?

Is that what I'm here to do? Talk about the black topic?

No, you're also here to speak for women.

Oh, that's nice.

I am a woman who is black, but I'm also a human being who is an attorney, a

mother of five, and somewhat knowledgeable about history, which is

I was invited here.

But when you look at me, this is all you see in me, a black woman? Oh, no,

absolutely not. You really, really have to get back to the show.

Ian, are you calm enough to continue?

I guess.

I'll give it the old college try.

Quiet, please.

In five, four, three, two... Well, we're

back.

Mrs. Huxtable, I'm afraid we only have 30 seconds left.

In that time, could you please tell us what effect the Depression had on the

blacks?

You want me to sum that up in 30 seconds?

Well, we're close to 20 seconds now. How did the depression affect life?

Well, we learned that misery does not love company.

That's today's edition of Retrospective.

I'm Ian Traquette.

Join us again next week.

Told you she could handle herself.

Your wife, la mujer perfecta. Yes.

Now, how long will it be for her to come down here?

No, that will take off her makeup.

Oh, okay.

Do you want some Cuban coffee? Cuban coffee? Yes, I think I will. Please.

There you are.

Have a look.

Oh, this is angry.

Strong coffee. Oh, coffee is good. No, no, no, no, no. No good. No donuts,

please.

My wife doesn't want me to have donuts either. Your wife won't let you have any

either? No. Oh, okay. Well, have some coffee.

Have some coffee.

Oh, boy.

What are you doing?

This is a donut.

Yeah, I know that.

And this is a donut.

Yes, it's not a donut.

This is not a donut. No, you can't have it.

Eat your pastry in peace. I'm just glad to hear it.

Dear, you were absolutely perfect.

Estupenda.

Señora, estuvo maravillosa.

Muchas gracias.

De nada.

Honey, I don't want to deal with makeup. I just want to get out of here.

Thank you.

Hello. One second.

Señora, para usted.

Ah, okay. Thank you.

Hello.

Really? Let me think about that a minute.

It's the producers, darling. They said it's the best show they've ever had.

want me to stay.

Really? Well, it's up to you, dear.

I've thought about it.

The answer's no. Thank you.

Getting up at 4 .30 in the morning to prove who I am to three men who are

basking in the non -existent rays of their own intelligence is not my idea of

fun time.

That is not a donut.

It's almost 8 o 'clock.

Mom and Dad better hurry up or they're going to miss their show.

You guys, come into the living room. I want you to see what I did with the

furniture. I rearranged it so both Mom and Dad would be happy.

ever gonna go for this ah this looks perfect

no ah come on please dear this is my couch this

is my chair cliff let go now sweetheart i know how attached you are to these

things but there comes a time in every man's life when he has to let go and if

he's married many times

Whatever it is, darling, let it go.

Come on, kids, let's get our coats and go.

What about your show? Aren't we going to watch it? We're going to tape it, all

right? I'll tell you about it on the way to church.

You coming?

Just let me have a minute here.

Amen.

Cosby Show is taped before a studio audience.

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