Original subtitles

Mom, did I get any phone calls?

Uh, Janet called, and then Kara called. I think it was Kara. She talks so fast,

I can never understand her. Yeah, that's Kara.

And anyone else?

No, honey, that's it.

Nobody else? Are you sure? Well, if you're talking about Roy, he didn't

Roy? Yeah, Roy. You remember him? The boy you talk to on the phone every time

turn around?

Oh, yeah. Well, I'm tired of him pestering me and calling here every day.

don't want to hear from him.

Did anyone call from your office?

Call for you at my office?

On my phone? Why would somebody want to call on my phone and ask for you? Did

you get my number out?

No.

I'm glad nobody called. I don't want any phone calls.

What's that all about? She got a pimple?

No, I think we're having a little trouble with Roy.

Roy! Well, that's what it is. We got another one turned 15.

And the boys are starting to ruin their lives. And ours.

Mom, Dad, are you home? I have something I want to tell you.

Oh, Lord.

Might be good.

How long have you lived here?

Come on.

Oh, God.

Hey. Oh, good. I'm glad you're home. Down.

So, what do you have to tell us?

Well, quit my job.

Things didn't work out for you at the pizza parlor, huh? Dad, I quit my job at

the pizza parlor about two weeks ago. I've had two jobs since then.

Vinny, you never told us you quit the job at the pizza parlor. Well, Mom, it

a nowhere job. I mean, the next step up was me flipping the dough in the air and

catching it.

All right, what job did you take after that?

The job that you quit to take the job you're quitting now.

Well, uh, that one I got fired from.

as a messenger for Elio, the fashion designer. His real name's Elliot, but he

makes everyone call him Elio.

Anyway, I was having lunch at a coffee shop, and I sort of forgot his sketches

on the counter for his entire spring wine.

And when I went back, someone had stolen them.

And that's when Elio fired you.

Yeah. I did insist that he pay me for the three hours that I worked for him,

though. Did you ask him about your Christmas bonus?

happy with the job I have now, which is a receptionist at the Pyramid Gallery.

But this is the job you're quitting. Well, Deb, you'd quit too if you had the

chance to get the job that I might get.

What's the job?

Once in a lifetime opportunity.

What is the job?

I don't think I could explain it as well as the woman that I'd be working for,

so I invited her over. She can explain everything that you need to know about

going to Africa.

The pygmies live in Africa, and I sort of need to be near them for this job.

When did they ask for you?

Elizabeth, the woman who's coming over here, is a photographer, and I want to

with her to take pictures of the pygmies in Africa. She wants me to be her

assistant. Denise, you have never expressed interest in pygmies or Africa.

Well, that's because I've never known anything about them until I saw

Elizabeth's photographs at the gallery.

I mean, they're incredible. And then she described what it's like there. So

fascinating. The pygmies believe that they are one with nature.

They live in complete harmony.

And because there's no competition, they don't spend their whole life trying to

climb the ladder of success.

Now I understand, because you fit right in there.

As a matter of fact, you won't even have to take an exam.

They'll just, you go right straight to honorary pig.

Hey, Vanessa.

What's the matter with you?

Are you having problems with Roy?

I don't want to talk about Roy. He doesn't mean anything to me.

That's not what you were saying two days ago.

You were saying, Roy, my love.

else I know you're having boy problems?

How? You knocked over your orange juice at breakfast.

Whenever you're having boy problems, you knock things over.

I do?

Yes.

What are you writing?

Home. Can I read it?

Sure, why not?

Thank you.

Nice penmanship.

I am alone in a field.

It's over.

The sun has set, but no one has said goodnight.

It's over.

I step on a cricket.

He makes no sound.

He's over.

You've got it bad.

How do you know about love anyway?

I know plenty.

I know that I'm going to have love the way I want it or not at all.

Can't control the way love happens?

Yes, I can.

If a boy ever tells me he doesn't love me anymore, I'm going to tell him,

wrong, Sporty. You're going to love me until I tell you not to love me anymore.

Look, Rudy, you're too young. You don't understand love. It doesn't work that

way. Well, it sure doesn't work your way.

I just needed a pencil because Kara and Janet are coming over to do homework

with me. Janet and Kara.

Kara, the one that talks so fast I don't understand a single word she's saying.

Really? I understand every word she says.

Oh, there they are now. Janet and Turbo Tongue.

Dad, be nice.

Hi, Dr. Hustable.

I'm not sure the dreams are going to really happen because I think it is. I

think that we're the ones whose dreams are going to come true for us. You

ask for it because I know it.

Three tickets to look, listen, and drool at. Are you listening? Because I hope

you're listening. Because if you are, you are going to die.

Tom, E, Tame, and the new Tame girl.

Wow. Can you believe it? And I told them to stick us up for backstage because

they are. That's right. Backstage. We all know what that means. I mean, Tommy

could, like, walk right by us after the concert. And he probably will. Then he

might actually touch us. Then actually go out to dinner with the band after the

concert. Right. And then he will.

And I better bring the band along because they're probably starving.

Well, I'm sure they're too nervous to eat before the concert. And during the

concert, well, I'm sure they just woke up and really...

I wouldn't invite him to a dog fight. He's stupid.

Vanessa, are you having problems with Roy?

Talk about it in my room.

Alexander told me that Freddie Simmons told him that Roy is going around school

telling people that he broke up with me.

No. Yeah.

And so I went up to Roy in the hall and I said, what's going on?

What did he say?

He said, I can't talk now. I have to go to chemistry class.

Did he expect you to believe that? He gets C's in chemistry.

He doesn't even care about chemistry.

I know.

He's just trying to avoid facing me.

Vanessa, if it's over between you and Roy, maybe you should just accept that

it's over. Hey, it's not over until I say it's over.

Ooh, I never heard you talk like this.

Where did you get that?

Rudy.

These are photographs.

of the pygmy women of the Ituri rainforest in Zaire. Very striking.

You do beautiful work.

Thank you. I'm working on a book of my photographs. It's a three -year project,

and I hope to get the photographs I need for the third section of my book with

this trip.

I'd like to hear about your living conditions on this trip.

This is very basic living.

We're going to be staying in small huts, and we're going to sleep on mats.

And does Denise know...

That there is no cable television?

Dad, of course I know it. It's completely natural, the way life was

What will you eat? The pygmies are hunter -gatherers, so their main diet is

boiled roots and wild leaves.

Yum, yum.

They also eat meat, such as antelope, and they'll eat snails and termites and

grubs and beetles.

Denise is going to eat bugs?

Mom, bugs are a very good source of protein.

I see. Well, how do you like yours?

Raw or al dente?

Actually, they cook the beetles. They throw them on hot coals. They peel back

the wings. They pull off the legs and the belly plate and they pop them in.

My father said never throw away a good belly plate.

We put him with a ham hock and add some water to that boy. You could sit there

all night long. We'd crunch away, you know.

I'm not discouraging you from letting Denise take this job. One question. Why

would you hire Denise?

Denise told me about all the jobs she's had lately, and frankly, she sounds just

exactly like me at that age when I was trying to find myself.

Okay, so you know Denise's track record. Let me ask you this. What are you going

to do when one day in the middle of the rainforest, Miss Denise comes up to you

and says, I am tired of sleeping on this mat now and eating these boiled leaves

and these bugs. I want to go home. Mom, I'm not going to say that.

Let's just say that you do say that.

The pygmies are very protective, and one of them would guide her out of the

forest to the nearest dirt road.

That's about a 20 or 30 -mile hike.

From there, she would hitch a ride on a supply truck another 100 miles to the

nearest field station.

When a plane becomes available... Becomes available.

Yes. She'll be picked up in a clearing.

Then she'll fly another thousand miles to the nearest city with the major

airport. And if it's not the rainy season, I'd say the whole trip shouldn't

any more than two weeks.

You know, I just feel stupid using a travel agent.

Yes, Sherry.

That was an incredible good night, kid.

It was like the sun had entered my body and was radiating energy out

to my fingers and toes.

Then I floated out of my body and just hovered over us.

And then you joined me and we floated hand in hand into the cosmos.

Mom?

How long have you been listening?

No, Sherry, no, don't hang up.

Mom, look what you did.

No, no, come on, don't make fun of me.

Sherry likes it when I talk to her like that.

Yeah, I'm sure.

All I did was kiss her goodnight.

Okay, bye.

Theo, did anybody call for me?

I wouldn't know. I was on the phone.

You are always on the phone. You know, there are other people. People in this

house. You must be expecting a phone call from Roy, huh?

I might be. I thought he dumped you.

How could you say that, you insensitive jerk?

That's what to say things like that to my brother.

Also stupid.

Hey, Vanessa, I just made this popcorn.

I'm sorry, Theo. I didn't see the bowl.

Just lashing out at everyone.

You don't want to eat this anymore, do you?

cost me $29.

I'm sorry. No, no, don't touch it.

I'll go into the kitchen and I'll get some paper towels.

Dad, you gotta do something about Vanessa. She blew up at me for no

knocked my popcorn all over the floor and she spilled milk all over my econ

book. The book I paid $29 for? Yeah, Dad, she's loose. I gotta straighten her

out. What seems to be the problem?

I don't know. Something about the phone, Roy.

The babe is freaked out.

No, no, no, no, no. You gotta understand, man. She's 15 years old. You

to have patience. Give me, give me this.

Just, just cool out, all right?

Hi.

Dad, I'm sorry.

I spilled milk all over the place and I spilled some popcorn.

Okay, here. Come on. Just sit down.

Sit down.

Sit down.

Over here, hon.

All right, now, my love. Now, what's the problem? What's happening?

Come on, talk to me.

About what?

Talk to me about what's bothering you, what's your problem, huh?

Dad, nothing's bothering me. I'm fine.

Okay, you're fine. Now, what do you tell me about Roy, then?

All right, Dad. Mm -hmm.

My friends are telling me that Roy is going around telling people that he

up with me. But he hasn't called to tell me.

But that's not what's upsetting me. It's the fact that he hasn't called to tell

me. You want me to go over to Roy's house and tell him to call you?

Daddy has to call me on his own. I can't call him.

If a guy's going to break up with me, I'd at least think he had the decency to

call me.

Really?

You think that guys are the only people who don't call back?

Women and girls don't call either. I will have you know.

When I was young, I met this girl named Marie and she didn't call me.

You mean there was somebody before mom?

Of course there was someone before your mother.

I met this girl named Marie. She was gorgeous.

So I went up to her and I said, you know.

I really like you very, very much. And she said, I think that you are

too. I said, well, I think that we would make a wonderful couple. So I said,

here's my phone number.

Please call me. I will wait by the phone. I went home. I waited by the

sat on the phone. My mother and father wanted to use the phone. I said, please

don't use the phone. Whatever you have to do, go to town, talk to the people.

She did not call, I'm telling you.

Finally.

I got a call.

Was it Marie?

No, it was your mother.

Dad, was this a story just to make me feel better?

Of course it was.

All right, dear.

What is taking them so long?

They've talked to Elizabeth. They've talked to Elizabeth's parents. They've

talked to each other.

Can't they just say yes or no?

Well, I hope you get to go.

And I'm not just saying that because I'll get my room back.

What'd they say?

I had my ear right to the door. And all I heard was, Denise, quit her.

And drop out.

That's all you heard?

No. But then I heard Daddy say, Rudy, get away from the door.

That's it. I'm not going. Chance of a lifetime. It'll never happen to me

Hello?

First of all, I want you to understand that I didn't appreciate you sending a

spy. And on top of that, you sent a lousy spy.

Sorry, I was just a little anxious.

Well, your father and I have reached a decision, Denise.

Before you tell Denise your decision, I'd like to say that I think Denise

go to Africa.

Remember two years ago you sent me on the Outward Bound program?

I was in the wilderness for two weeks and I learned a lot.

You learned that you didn't want to go outward bound again.

Your father and I have debated every aspect of this question, and the

that we've reached has not been an easy one.

I knew it. I'm not going. I knew it. May I finish, please?

Yeah. We've decided that as far as this trip to Africa is concerned, the answer

is yes.

Wait a minute, wait a minute now. We still have a few questions to ask

Elizabeth. I'm sure she'll be happy to answer anything you need to know.

Oh, I am so excited. You guys, don't worry about me. I'm going to be fine. I

know where I'm going is going to be difficult and rugged.

But the most difficult part is going to be being away from you guys.

I really enjoy being back here. It's been really nice.

And I hope you think of me a little bit because I'm going to be thinking about

you while I'm away every day.

You lie.

Once a week.

That's better, thank you.

Gotta miss you.

Yeah, me too, sis.

Me too.

It is not going to be the same here without you.

Yes! I got my room back!

I love life!

I got it!

Hello, Huxle resident.

Well, well, well.

We've been expecting to hear from you.

Vanessa, it's Roy.

Roy? Let him have it. Show him no mercy.

I'm going to take this in the other room.

Rudy, come with me. I might need some help.

I got it.

Roy, I want to talk to you.

Vanessa, I want to talk to you, too.

Well, you're going to listen to me first.

Do you know what you put me through?

I'm sorry.

Sorry. How come I have to hear from other people that you broke up with me?

I never said that I broke up with you.

You didn't? No.

Well, then how come you didn't call me back? And how come you didn't talk to me

in the hallway?

Greg Zinser told Freddie Timmons that you told people that you were mad at me.

Wait a minute. Those are the same guys who said that you said that we were

breaking up.

I never said that.

I said, I hope we never break up.

really said that? Yeah.

So I guess this means we're getting back together, huh?

We never broke up.

Okay, let's meet at the mall tonight.

Okay. Bye. Bye -bye.

How come you didn't let him have it?

Roy is a gentleman, Rudy, and he was trying to protect my feelings.

Oh, man.

Love's a joke.

No, it's not.

Not if you have a guy like Roy.

She'll be writing about dead crickets again.

The Cosby Show was taped before a studio audience.