Original subtitles

Oye, por ahí viene Vilkovsky, oyele!

No, no, no. You guys come on over.

You're welcome.

Well, Claire has to teach a class at the community center tonight, so it's...

Come on. You're welcome.

All right, Dad.

Bye -bye.

What? My father.

That's what.

My father.

said to me, he and Homer Dobson are coming over here and they want me to

one of their old army buddies.

Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Now, this wouldn't have anything to do with Pinochle. Yes.

And my father didn't say anything about Pinochle, did not mention cards at all.

But I know, I know that he and Homer are bringing this man over to help them

cheat me.

Why would they do that?

Because I beat them the last time they played here. And I'll bet you that this

man has never been in the Army. Number two, I bet you he's some Pinochle

champion from out of state. Well, I'm glad I won't be here tonight. When you

your dad get together to play Pinochle, it is pathetic.

Yes.

She does.

I would just like to say one thing. I've been upstairs for an hour putting this

outfit together. Now, I think I've done very good work. However, Vanessa here is

doubting me. Vanessa, that is a very smart outfit.

But do I look good? You look stunning.

Oh, thank you, Mother. Okay, Denise, I say we go with this. Hey, who?

Who?

What about me?

Sorry, Dad.

What do you think?

I think you look, uh, bold.

yet subtle.

I think you look contemporary, yet aromatic.

Thank you, Dad.

Now, where are you going in that thing?

I'm going to a skin party.

Oh, yeah? Who are you going with?

With a friend of hers.

Which friend?

Just a friend.

Well, what was the friend's name?

Tyrone!

Tyrone. That's the boy?

Unless it's short for...

Tyronella?

Uh, no, Dad. It's a boy.

Aha!

So, what time is this young man coming over to pick you up?

You know, sooner or later, he's got to come here to pick you up.

And then he'll meet me, Mr.

Charm.

Tyrone, you belong to me.

Hello, operator?

Hi, my name's Theodore Huxtable. I don't think my phone is ringing when it's

supposed to, so do you think you can call me back and check it?

Thanks.

Yeah, I guess it is working.

Thanks, operator.

What's that all about?

Well, I was expecting this phone call from a girl today, and the phone never

rang.

Well, why don't you call her up?

Well, I can. It's past the deadline.

Oh, you mean her parents won't let a call come in at this hour?

No, it's not that kind of deadline.

See, I asked Condola Burns to go out with me tonight.

She said she was 99 % sure she would. And when she was 100 % sure, she'd call.

I didn't know what to do, so Cockroach told me to use the deadline delivery

method.

cockroach deadline delivery message.

You see, you ask a girl to go out with you, and if she says she's not sure,

you tell her that she has to give you an answer by a certain time, and she can

forget it. And that's exactly what I did.

You might as well go to bed now.

Cockroach deadline delivery.

Well, I'd like you to meet a dear friend of mine, Sergeant Major Boswell Stokes,

U .S. Army, retired.

Ah -ha. Well, how are you, sir? Nice to meet you. Pleased to meet you. Come on.

Your father tells me you're in the Navy. Oh, yes.

Well, I'll try not to hold that against you.

Well,

it's good to see you, sir.

Thanks for having us over. Well, thank you for coming over. Well, I haven't

you since the last time we played cards.

Yeah? I missed you.

Same here.

You know, it's quite a coincidence.

This morning I was talking to my wife, and what we were discussing is how

don't just stop by and visit anymore like they used to in old days.

Is that the truth?

Yes, indeedy.

And that's why it's so important that the three of you came by.

It's wonderful.

Come by and sit and chat and be concerned about me and my family.

Well, that's why we're here.

Yes, indeedy.

Well, wonderful.

Of course, we don't have to just sit and chat.

We could engage in some entertaining activity if we want.

Does anybody have any ideas?

Yeah.

I think we could put on our coats and take a nice walk by the river.

Uh, we parked down by the river. We already took that walk.

But there is something we haven't done in a while.

What's that?

Cards? True.

Cards.

Well, I mean, that sounds fine for me, but I don't know if Sergeant Stokes

here... Well, a game of cards? Well, I think that'd be nice.

In particular... Pinochle.

So? Well, that looks good.

I don't know.

Vanessa, come on. You have tried on everything in your closet. You've even

on my clothes.

Just go with this. This looks the best on it.

It looks good now, but how is it going to look when I put the skates on? Now,

that's the question.

Put on your skates.

You know, that's a great idea.

Oh, Vanessa, I love those shoes. You know, they're definitely you.

Lay off, Theo. I'm trying to look my best for tonight, okay? What's the big

deal? You're going to a skating party. You're going to spend most of your time

falling down anyway.

Yes, I should be falling down with a date, which is more than we could say

you tonight.

Everyone gets stood up once in a while.

Oh, yeah, especially when they use the cockroach deadline delivery method.

Well, we're working a few bugs out of it. Don't worry, Phil. You'll get a date

someday.

Say,

Homer, do you happen to remember an old singing group called The Diamonds?

The Diamonds? Yeah, I remember The Diamonds.

They sang a song I really liked.

Do you remember the name of it?

I don't know. The Diamonds used to sing a lot of songs. But what I think you're

thinking of is, I ain't got none.

Partner, they're trying to cheat us.

Oh, I don't know what you mean, partner. All I hear is two gentlemen discussing

their love of music.

As a matter of fact, I think a little later we ought to go to some clubs and

listen to some music.

That's a good idea.

How many clubs did you have in mind?

About two.

Hello, Ms. Peter Condola?

She's out?

On a date?

Oh. Well, would you tell her that Theo Huckable called and that I'm sorry and

that it was all Cockroach's idea?

Thanks. Bye.

Yes. Hi, I'm Vanessa Huxtable, and I'm here to pick up Tyrone Baxter.

You sure about that?

I mean, I'm Tyrone Baxter, and I'm here to pick up Vanessa Huxtable.

You're gonna be okay.

Yeah.

Hey, dude, I'm still Vanessa's brother. Come on in and take off your coat.

Thanks. I appreciate it. Really appreciate it.

Watch it! Don't be surprised.

Is somebody having a fight in there?

No, that's my dad and my granddad with their friends playing cards. Come on in.

Now, if you really want to get in good with my dad, you have to play pinnacle,

either that or chess.

I play chess. I love chess. And I can learn to play pinnacle. Really, I can.

It's okay, relax.

I'm not the important one. That's my dad.

Yeah. Now, he's in there, but there are a couple of things I need to know about

you first.

What kind of music do you like?

All kinds, really.

My dad likes jazz.

I like jazz. Really, I do.

Now, me, I'm into rhythm and blues, rock and rap.

I like all that. I'm into all of it.

Vanessa likes funk. Funk is my life, really. I mean... Tyrone,

I think it's time you should be my dad.

Really? I mean, what should I say? How should I be?

Just be yourself.

How's that?

Tyrone, don't run.

Dad treats all the guys that come in here the same.

Like dirt.

Come on, let's clean up my dad.

Good luck.

Uh, wait a second, Theo.

What? Are you sure your father really wants to meet me?

Tyrone is nothing to be nervous about. You're gonna go in there, dad's gonna

say, nice to meet you, and you're gonna say the same here.

Come on.

Excuse me. Hey. Dad?

This young man is here to take Vanessa to the skating party. His name is Tyrone

Baxter. Tyrone, this is my dad, Dr. Huxtable.

Tyrone, how are you?

Same here, Dr. Huxtable.

Same here.

Me too, I really meant that.

But don't the rest of us get an introduction?

This is my father. How do you do, sir?

This is his closest friend, Homer Dobson. How do you do, sir?

And this is Sergeant Major Stokes. How do you do, sir? He's a professional card

shark.

Do you want something cold to drink?

Sure. You got 50 cents?

How about a soda?

Yeah, I like soda.

Make sure you get the 50 cents.

Tyrone, so you're going to take out my Vanessa, huh?

Vanessa is very, very special to me.

You understand?

And I've always thought a young boy come and take out my daughter, he would have

to be special after all.

If he ever did anything to hurt her, take this.

Have a good time.

Is that all you want to ask me, Dr. Huckable?

I mean, is there anything else?

What more did you want me to say?

Oh, nothing. I'm fine.

Good.

Now get out.

Nice meeting all of you. Okay. Goodbye.

Dad, you were pretty easy on them. Were you okay?

I don't have time to take prisoners. I'm in the middle of a war right now.

Do me a favor.

Give him a soda and tell him everything's all right. Okay.

Tell him my name is...

Well, if you got it all wrong, this is not a war. A war is where you fight

battles and win a Purple Heart.

We know a few men who won Purple Hearts, don't we, Homer?

Mm -hmm.

How many men do we know who won Purple Hearts?

Oh, I'd say about three.

I only knew one myself, and he was a little bitty fellow.

I'm serious, Tyrone. Dad really liked you.

You really think so?

He talked to you, didn't he? You're in.

Yeah, but I'm still nervous.

I mean, this is my first date.

Hi, are you Tyrone?

Yes. I'm Rudy, and Vanessa looks good.

When is she coming down?

Soon. So, Tyrone, tell me about yourself.

Um, I'm in the eighth grade.

That's nice.

Are you going to kiss Vanessa tonight?

Do I have to answer this?

I think you should.

Well, it's up to her.

Smart man.

Hi, Tyrone.

Sorry to keep you waiting.

It's all right.

I told you she looked good.

You do, Vanessa. Really, you do.

Hi, I'm Denise. I'll be driving you to the skating rink.

I'll get it.

Hello. Hi.

Hi. May I help you? I'm Aaron Stokes, Sergeant Stokes' grandson.

I'm Vanessa Huxtable.

My grandpa forgot his glasses at my house.

Oh, well, he's in the kitchen. I'll show you. Come in. Thanks, Vanessa.

Uh, Tyrone, I'll be right back.

This way.

Oh, Tyrone, what grade are you in?

Eight. She's right. Um, what grade are you in?

Oh, I'm a freshman in college.

College. Oh, I like college. I'm gonna go. Really, I am.

That's nice.

Denise? Yeah, um, there's something I have to give you when it's in my room.

Could you come with me now?

Vanessa, we're about to leave.

Yeah, but if I don't give it to you now, I'll probably forget and you'll leave

for school without it.

What is it?

Tyrone and Denise and I will be right back. Just come on. Sure.

Tyrone, there's one thing you need to know about girls.

They always need a little extra time before going on a date.

You must know a lot about dating.

Oh, yeah.

In fact, I would be on one right now, but I chose to stay home and spend some

time with the family.

Vanessa, what did you need to give me? Nothing. That's not why I brought you up

here.

Denise, I'm confused.

About what?

Aaron. Isn't he incredible?

Okay. Okay? Did you see his eyes?

The way he moved, the way he wore his suspenders?

He's okay.

I would love to ask him to go skating with us.

Vanessa, have you lost your mind?

you mean?

Oh, you can't do that.

You've already got a date. What are you going to do, drop Tyrone?

No, I want him to go, too.

Oh, you have lost your mind. Vanessa, please, try and concentrate on one guy

a time, okay?

But guys do this to girls all the time.

Look at Theo and Cockroach. They're pigs.

You do have a point, but it's still not fair to Tyrone.

Okay, okay.

I think the Lakers are going to go all the way.

I like the Rockets. Me too. If you ask me, they're going to take it. You're a

Rockets man? You better believe it. All right.

Sorry for the delay, everybody.

Oh, Aaron.

You're still here.

Yeah, we were just talking about basketball.

Vanessa, are you finally ready? Because you've been keeping my man Tyrone

waiting a long time.

Oh, it's all right. The skating party will still be going.

You guys are going skating?

Yeah. You want to join us?

Sounds like fun. I'll ask Brenda.

Are you crazy?

What's the matter?

You're letting another guy come with you on your date? So I like Aaron. Who

cares? Don't you see what's happening here? This guy may end up going for

Vanessa. You have to tell him he can't go.

No, I don't want to do that.

Why not?

I'm already nervous about going on a date with Vanessa.

If Aaron's there, he'll take off the pressure.

Yeah. Well, there won't be any pressure when you're skating alone, pal.

My granddad said it's okay. Oh, great. Let's go.

You know, Aaron, I'm really glad you're going. Me too.

Me too.

I can't believe Vanessa has two dates.

Yeah, and she didn't even have to use the cockroach deadline delivery method.

During the war, there's one particular night I remember. I was in a foxhole,

the bombing and the shooting had stopped.

I looked up at the sky and I saw hundreds and hundreds of stars dancing

treetops. And I thought, when man stops fighting, he can see God's work.

I never saw any stars.

Stars? Is that another word for diamonds?

No, stars.

Stars, stars.

I'm serious.

I was in a tank.

Well, we both were.

761st tank battalion. That's right. It was in those tanks that we saw our

greatest and our most humiliating moment. You remember that?

What happened?

Well, we must have been the only platoon to have captured the enemy.

And the enemy made us feel like they were doing us a favor. What are you

about? Well, we had surrounded this platoon of Nazis with our tanks.

After a while, they came out of the woods.

Waving the white flag, their hands held up in the air.

Our commander, Captain Charlie Gates, told us to stay inside our tanks and

direct them back toward the infantry.

But you see, I'm from Chicago.

I know. I started thinking, now look, I helped capture these guys.

There's probably a photographer out there. I can get my picture in the stars

strength. But wait a minute now.

Wait a minute. Some of the other guys must have thought the same thing

oh, well, a bunch of us sort of popped. Just to take a look. Okay.

When those Nazis saw that they had been captured by an all -black American tank

platoon... Uh -oh.

Looks on their face seemed to get... No, no. Not you guys.

No, not anybody but you guys. No. I can't go back to my hometown and tell

that I surrendered to you guys.

You know, they turned around and started walking back toward the woods. No, they

didn't. Captain Gates gave us orders to fire a few rounds over their heads. I

guess that's what made them decide it wasn't so bad being captured by us.

So they did come back.

Well, they had to, didn't they?

Let me tell you, when I was in the Navy, we were on maneuvers. Wait a minute.

Wait a minute. What was this?

1958. See, we were on maneuvers. I don't think there was a war on in 1958.

But you don't have to have a war for things to be dangerous. Hold it, then.

Where were these maneuvers?

We were in Bermuda.

Russell, would you play a card, please?

No, wait a minute. We were... That's the wrong card. Everything doesn't have to

be...

Son,

you said you were only taking up five. You've been here 20 minutes.

I don't want to play anymore.

Why not?

I listen to your war stories. You won't listen to my Navy story.

But we want to play cards.

I don't want to play cards.

You guys listen to my story.

If we listen to your story, will you come back and finish the card game?

Okay. Well, this had better be good.

We're on maneuver, see? And this is serious maneuvers. Hi!

How did it go?

Great. I didn't fall once.

It's kind of hard to fall when you've got a boy on both arms.

Where's my grandson?

Oh, I dropped both the boys off at home.

Times have changed. In my day, a girl only went on a date with one boy at a

time. My day, too.

Well, you know, it wasn't really a date. It was more of a get -together. Oh,

yeah. They're getting together again next week. You don't say.

Yeah. We all had a great time, so we're going bowling next Friday.

I better go up and find out what I'm going to wear for that.

Denise, will you help me? Okay, but I'm only picking out one outfit for you.

Okay, and that's the outfit I'll wear. Good. If I like it.

Good night. Good night.

Russell,

you have lovely granddaughters. Thank you.

Well, who am I?

You, sir, are a bad card player.

Come on, let's get back to the game. Yeah, all right. No, no, no, no. Sit

I haven't finished my story.

I thought you were finished.

I'm not finished.

Now, I was in the Navy.

We're maneuvers, serious maneuvers. Off the coast of Bermuda. Yes, the coast of

Bermuda. Now, I'm lying in my bunk and I hear the sound of General

Quarters. Now, there's a fire in compartment 1021.

Well, that can be dangerous, a fire aboard your vessel. Yeah, but this was

real fire. This was a fire drill. Yeah, the fire drill out.

It wasn't real?

No, it wasn't real, but it's still dangerous because it's in this

Gentlemen, why don't we take that walk down by the way? And see, I had to get

up. Now, the compartment is here and over here. This is where I am. I'm in

my bunk. Now.

By the time I got to the compartment, come in.

The Cosby Show is taped before a studio audience.