Original subtitles

Hey, you kids out there.

This show's specially for you.

I guess you've grown up for life, too.

Hi, Vanessa.

Where are you going?

Oh, nowhere.

Why do you have ice skates?

Okay, I'm going ice skating. Can I come?

Rudy, you wouldn't like it. There'll be a lot of big people there, and you could

get bumped around.

I don't care.

You could fall on the freezing cold ice and catch pneumonia.

I don't care.

Your ankles aren't strong enough. They're going to swell up and you won't

able to walk for a week.

I don't care.

Ruby, everyone there is going to be 11 and you wouldn't have any fun.

Tell you what, I'll take you sledding tomorrow.

Thanks, ma 'am. See you later.

Hey, Rudy.

Do you want to play?

I'm sorry, I really can't.

I have something very important to discuss with Dad.

Have you seen him?

Dad's busy.

Doing what?

Cleaning the stove.

Did you say you'd like some help?

No. Good.

Hey, Dad, how's it going?

Fine. Almost finished?

Finished. Hey, next time ask me.

I would have been happy to help.

next Saturday is the booster banquet for the football team.

Yeah, your mother and I bought two tickets for it. Well, can you buy a

more? See, everybody on the team has to sell ten.

How many have you sold?

Counting you?

Uh -huh.

Two.

How many people have you asked?

Counting you?

Yeah. Two. Two.

Mr. Dunn, you're supposed to go outside of the house. Well, I figured you could

ask some of the doctors over at the hospital.

Ask some of the doctors over at the hospital. Ask some of the doctors over

the... That's all you people ever think about in this house. Every time you have

something to sell, it's getting so I walk in the doctor's lounge, they say,

-oh, here's Huxtable, and they dive under the sofa.

Dad, I'm telling you, it's going to be a great thing.

After dinner, they're going to show a film over the season's highlights.

See, this is going to be a short film.

As a matter of fact, it's no sense even turning the lights off.

Now, look, do me a favor. I forgot to put the thing in back there.

So just put those things in for me. Thank you.

Hello?

This is Rudy.

Rudy Huxtable.

I live in New York City.

It's, uh, pardon me, please.

Hello?

Hi. This is Rudy's father.

Well, how is the weather in Ireland?

Uh, she's fine.

Oh, you do?

No, no, thank you. I don't want to talk to Sean.

Yeah, okay, good.

Thank you. And top of the morning to you, too.

Honey, I thought I said to you that the rules of the house state that you do not

pick up that phone and dial unless someone helps you.

That's right.

What's the matter? Come on.

I'm bored.

Really? I've got over $3 million worth of books I bought in your room.

I'm not into reading today. You're not into reading today?

Well, what about drawing some letters, some A's, some B's? I did that already.

What about playing with Dad? I'll be your friend.

Can my friend Maria come over?

Maria, I'm your friend.

No, you're my daddy.

Are you kidding me?

Daddies make the best friends. Why do you think dogs always hang out with

Can Maria sleep over?

Well, I'll ask Maria's mother and father.

Can a few other friends sleep over?

Sure. You want to fly in, Sean, from Ireland?

gonna have some of her friends sleep over tonight?

Well, dear, didn't you always say that we should entertain more?

What, tonight?

Cliff, you know I'm not coming home until late.

Listen, I can handle it by myself.

All right, I'll get Rudy's clap list. It has the parents' names and numbers on

it. Hi.

My favorite daughter.

What's up?

We're having some friends over for dinner. Like you to pitch in. Great.

coming? Oh, some lively guests.

Okay.

Old clothes.

Rudy's having a sleepover.

Ah, Dad, I just remembered. I have plans tonight.

Okay, go ahead.

We'll just use your room while you're gone.

I'd put them in my pocket because dimples, people steal them.

You don't see that.

Who else has a note?

Now, what is your name?

Naoka. Naoka.

All right. It says here that you are a compulsive gambler.

And that you are wanted by the police.

Is this correct?

All right. But it does say that you're allergic to milk. Is that correct?

I mean, can you eat a cookie with milk in it?

Have you ever had a cookie?

Then you won't get any hair either.

Don't sit down.

All right.

May I see you for a minute, please?

Now, I don't understand how you got in the house with us if he wasn't in the

with us. You know Peter, Daddy, he lives across the street.

You're Peter from across the street?

Well, how did he get in the house?

He was playing outside when you said, everybody get in line.

Son, go across the street and ask Mrs. Tiara if it's all right if Peter can

stay. Okay, Dad.

All right, we go sit down.

Uh, come here, please.

Yes, please.

Now, what is your name?

Shane.

Well, go ahead.

You can sit down.

May I see you, please?

Yes. Come here, double vision.

And your name is? Kyle.

Lena. Do you sing or dance?

We don't dance.

When you're in school?

No. Do you know some little songs?

Yeah. What?

Do you want to do the answer?

Would you do it for me?

Yeah. I would love to see it.

It's just a game.

All right, you know the rules. Arms sideways.

All right, we're riding.

And the horse looks like arms to the side. Now, you're just falling off. And

there she goes.

She's doing it. And the horse, whoa, whoa, whoa. Stay on and off. That was 12

seconds. Wasn't bad, wasn't bad.

All right, come on over. And here, sing a song.

Here we go. Now, arms out to the side. And sing is riding in the bucking horse.

Raise your arms up. Keep them off to the side. And the horse broke out of the

stall.

I'm sorry. You didn't do well at all.

And I thought, didn't I put these things in my pocket?

Here, I'm taking those dimples out. And here we go.

Just climb right on up here.

And put your arms out to the side.

And here the horse is coming out of the stall.

She's up and hands to the side.

Didn't do good at all. Just come on.

I'm sure you ride better than your sister, don't you?

Arms out to the side. You're doing fine.

catches you, he will nub you.

Sit down, sit down. You can't move till the monster moves.

into six and you're already pulling the old cookie trick.

Means only one thing, you're running out of steam.

No, no, I got everything under control, Dad.

Yeah, I see you limping.

No, no, no, no, no, I'm fine, fine. It's just track injury.

Son, I know bucking horse knee when I see it.

You are enjoying this, aren't you?

I went out to a seminar, so I decided I would take care of this myself. My son,

when I came to the door, I mean, it was clear to me that the tide was shifting.

You were going out, and the children were coming in.

And you're going to be drowning the children in about ten minutes, and lucky

you, somebody came along who can bail you out.

And you're telling me that you can control these children better than I

That's exactly what I'm saying.

And I'm willing to put my much -needed retirement money on the line for this.

Why? I don't feel I'm here to talk about betting.

Well, I will bet you that if you leave me alone with these children for one

minute, 60 seconds, they'll be sitting here as quiet as little angels.

Well, look, anybody can threaten children.

I'm not going to threaten them.

Now, do you want to make the bet or not?

$20. It's been a long time since I took some money from you.

But it certainly will be my pleasure.

Oh, he's got to spend some time with the children, unless you want to see him

for the last time.

Why? What's going on? Your grandfather bet me $20 that he could have the

children completely quiet in one minute. But that's impossible.

You better believe it, especially when the sugar from the cookies kicks in on

him.

Dad, you should have bet him $50.

No, I can't do that. That's my father, man. It's hard enough for me to take $20

from him.

But you're going to do it, aren't you? Yeah.

These are eight lovely children who can be well -behaved with the proper

supervision. You're not going to tell me, right?

Not a chance.

Hello, children. Excuse me. I'm going to have to be going now.

Thanks for a lovely visit.

Hey,

Grandpa.

You're a big football fan, right? Sure am. Love the gridiron. How would you

to go to my football team's booster banquet?

How much are the tickets?

Five dollars a piece.

I'll take eight.

Thanks, Granddad.

Filled my quota in the house.

Okay. Thanks for coming over, Dad.

Oh, it's good to see you, son.

Have a good time.

Take care. Bye -bye. Bye.

What did my old gray -haired gentleman friend say to you?

Come here, Peter.

What did Granddad say to you? He said, if we were quiet and smile, you'll give

us each a dollar in the morning.

is taped in front of a live studio audience.