Original subtitles

I'm going to put on my makeup.

Honey, not like that! You have to be precise

Mom we've been doing this forever

Well it'll fine

Make it perfect and you won't have too do as long okay?

The blue goes right here

This is what's in mom

Everything has too pristine and perfect

like this I really kind of don't need the attitude right now and you do but

dazzle

oh my god baby so happy to see you stop mom is driving me nuts

why what's going on what are you guys doing

So we are working on all

the pageant costumes for The Year because Scarlett is going

You're gonna do so good.

Thank you, so much!

She's going to be amazing if we can get every single outfit perfect

because have one for every holiday

We're doing 4th of July now

Okay

But also have what else?

The nautical theme one

Nautical

Yeah and then there is gonna like a Victorian renaissance

I forgot what it was called

The renaissance with the tulle

It is gonnabe beautiful

Really wanna make some really lacy pretty

You ca look into that sweetie

But I mean, really the important thing is that we beat Kelly and her kind of ugly daughter Betty.

Okay?

Oh my god!

You care more about beating her than you care about me actually winning this game

Sweetheart no i care about you winning too because

Of how it makes

Me look as

A mom

Exactly

Sorry who's Betty again

We don't even

Ugh

Never listen

I do listen, i swear.

Okay

Always paying attention

And how do you...

You care

How to you

Do this?

Uh

So confused

It's

Its actually very difficult and very precise

But Scarlett has been doing better at it

We use the glue gun

Um

Yeah here

Why don't just help out a little bit

Right

Oh yeah

Yeah

Umm

Like

Just

Grab this

Get in

Yup

Just

Yeah

Just like that

Okay

Oh my gosh, she's actually not bad at this. You're hired

But you like how mine looks right? Like better than hers

Like I feel like

Honey it is not a competition with me

It is competition with Betty

Oh okay

Thank you

Of course yeah

Your doing such good job helping

That wonderful

We'll have thing done by sundown maybe

Sundown

Mom!

Haven't eaten all day

Okay well

Your always complaining

but your won' t complain once win the gold

So, do you use the pushpins to attach the stars?

Obviously.

Brian...

Obviously! Come on

Do you know nothing about bedazzling?!

Push pins are an essential part of bedazzling

Don't get her started on the push pins

She'll never shut up

I will never stop

Never quiet about push pins

And so how many that even gets done

Well they are useful

Thankyou for understanding

He might actually get it

Can you stop grouping my mom and help with this?

I mean, it's the law. That is what we are supposed to do

This is supposed to be about me today

Honey...I mean

It totally fine right

This part of the law now

And think that just what were supposed too

Maybe will help you

Be less stressed out

You just need calm down a little bit

Yeah

Just

Calm dow

Whose side ar eyou on

I'm just trying to play both sides here, okay?

That's true. You're doing a pretty good job of playing both sides

but you should be more on my side because my bedazzling is better

Well...I'd say that you both are very good at it

Just yours is better

No babe

If like mom and dad

20 years experience an won 2 summer fair in row

Let me know what am talking about

How was that

Wow, let's be a brat about it. Let´s do that

Why don't you bedazzle? Okay

Mom! I've been bedazzling for hours

Well...you're gonna do great okay

It is totally fine

Do you really think i'm gonna beat Betty and...?

Honey..I have all the faith in your

Just need more push pins

That really what we think needs

You thinks that most of them are pushpins

Yeah

Yep

Whatever

Yeah

I will say, my favorite one of these is 4th of July.

Yeah yeah honestly i have to say that too

Well look at your outfit!

Ever since you married me and dad it's been one thing we do together

It just coordinates specifically

Babe love your outfit last year too

Really? That so sweet honey

I didn't even think you paid attention.

You know, we have a DASA thought too right?

Oh...I had no idea!

Thought you bought it that way

No she actually made it

and taught her to do perfectly

And It was perfect

That was such good outfit

Should've held here and there

She showed exactly how

How did she burn herself with the glue gun

Mom!!

That'so embarrassing

Its not embarrassing

There is learning curve

Yeah

No, you just put a lot of effort into it. That's the good thing

You still have those screws in there

Oh I don'think you're even close to almost done

There is plenty more that needs happen on the straps too

We live and we learn

That what say in this family

So happy that lived

And then learned

Definitely

But I'm not going to try it again.

私はグループガンを使うのが大変なことだった。

みんな、それに気づいたんだよ。

そしてその時もやらないといけなくなるからね

あなたって本当にはすごい才能あるよね

だけど今年全然ダメになっちゃいました

もしもう一回やってたなら

なぜか去年買わず貰えちゃうんじゃないかな

それで勝てると思ってる?

チャンピオネスでもそうじゃん

いや!

お母さんチューリングシーンでは

110年前までパジェットできませんでした

Okay, it's only been 20 sweetheart. You don't need to speak to me that way and I remember it like

It was yesterday the light my god

Let not get through

My outfit

The bedazzled stars

Mom focus

Sorry what?

Focus

Okay

Yes

yes

This is your time

This Is Your leotard

okay

Its

This is my leotard for my pageant.

Yes, it is and you're going to do great

and make your mom so proud!

Yeah

You're doing great babe

Thanks baby

Well Ryan why don't you tell me what

have been up too?

I feel like we haven''t caught on in a long time

Oh well

Work's been good

Why didn´T YOU talk about that project

thats all

work on this projects

You know, they put me under a lot of pressure but my boss said I did really good job.

And uh...

My dad? He retired recently so you know

That's wonderful! Yeah that was good for him

Family is good and

You're coming about the end aren't you

I'm just so happy that this project you've been working on is about to come to an end

because you're going have SO much time helping me with these pageants.

Yeah, and then...you can teach how badazzle better!

You never bedazzled my dad

Y'know?

Can i teach him??

Babe do u really want mommy teaching ya???

Oh ummm yeah

Maybe we could both teach her

Both of us!!

She's learning

she good but not as good

As im

I actually think you should have my mom teach you, because it gives me a lot more time by myself to focus on

My own crafts.

Oh yeah!

Well wait what other crafts do you besides bedazzling?

Well Mom...I like shop that's crafting right

No no honey that is not crafting

Bedazzling in the only craft that matters

Mom, I'm not always the dazzle.

You know honestly pageants are one thing but

you want to be an architect?

In this family?!

...I wanna go college like school

Ew!

This is a beauty pageant family

and that's what we will do in this family

But mom i like reading books

Nevermind

Okay, babe. You'll need a phone topper one day...

I'm just trying to chime in and keep the peace

Well that's not really keeping the peace

She doesn't like it when i read

She only likes him do bedazzle

You'l never get anywhere if you read

And have told yo that since your were younger

OMG mom okay

Hone your pageant craft

an make me proud of u

Okay young lady?

It is important let people follow their interest

Just saying

Sorry Ryan

Didn'' ask

Did I ask you?

Sorry, Sophia.

It's Mrs Locke

Yeah that was so weird

You just called her Sophia

Its fine

We've gotten to know each other

How can we not know each other at all

Okay alright

Sorry babe

You look frustrated, babe. Is everything okay?

Babe every time I close my eyes all i see is bedazzling

Are you tired of bedazzling

But you're getting really good at it

Sweetheart why don't we just take a break

That's what Ryan here for

Come here

Yeah come here babe

Yeah

There ya go

I just want a good, happy family with

A lovely daughter who does her pageants the way she'supposed to.

That is all i ask for

Is that fair for me to asked Ryan?

Very fair

Thank you Cassie

You're welcome

Just have get those shoes

We don't even have shoes

To match this

And this isn' t just like few days

What are we gonna do mom

Well

Ill go shopping with you

Yo know

Hate shopping

But im goo boyfriend

Yeah

You are a good boyfriend.

That would be really sweet of you, Ryan

But does he even know what kind shoes to get?

What kind glitter they need

The colors the patterns

Definitely not

You know just like emotional support

Oh an emotional support boyfriend

I've heard about that on the internet

That's nice

Do you even know what tha internet is mom

It's kind of okay.

But yeah, I was thinking with that one just because it is so bedazzled

with the little stars and stickers

then maybe i could change them up and get like lacy shoes

Oh! That hot

Right?

We are not doing hot shoes

we are doing practical good for your line stepping dance shoes

Okay

We don't want hot shoes, Ryan.

I like looking at hot shoes

While she's doing her pageantry

If you're calling it for men-wise

You'd just be barefoot right?

That is actually a good point

Yeah we don' t wanna do that

Shoos are potentially the most important part of an outfit

Right

I think the shoes are the most...

Okay, obviously the push pins are most important.

Umm..I don't know

The first thing they see is

They see accessories

You know?

Instead of matching

They should mismatch

So like pink or blue

Because it's 4th July

Red and then blue

What do you think Dave

I think that's a great idea.

Anything you say, babe

Unpartialed white of the red white and blue

That is good color for that

We are supposed to get dressed soon?

Oh right! Yes we need to figure it out

Well honey

It is finally here

The day we've been waiting for, the 4th of July pageant.

And you look so beautiful!

Mom I know i've been really grumpy lately

and can't promise it wont happen again but

It does mean a lot how much you have helped me

Ah...I couldn'' t have done this without your help

Oh..i love hearing that

You're just sweet

This dress turned out perfectly

Do u really think?

Yes

We did all those bedazzling things

You finally learned and you did it amazingly.

I really love the feeling of the fabric!

Oh my god babe, you really should have

Ryan how sweet if you what a thoughtful thought

It's her big day

She is special

I really think i have it in the bag this year, guys.

If you don't win...

...I'll be disappointed

But we're going to win this year

..i hope so

You know Betty?

She didn''t even bedazzle her dress

Bet she didn'

It won´T even shine

No way

She's been busy practicing

Practicing her talent, which doesn't matter.

Yeah! Of course a talent?

A talent over bedazzling

She'll never win

There's not chance

I don' think so

You know Ryan

It is really sweet of you

that you brought her flowers

it is nice that

you support all

for pageantry

At least take advantage

We only have 72

this year

and just means

lot

That come

and supports

there in the audience

foe

she jus

She's just such a sweetheart, and she works so hard.

Let me get this hair over here too

Thank you mom

You're welcome sweetie

This is just lovely relationship that you two have

So mutual

I'm just lucky to have her

That is nice of you say

Well we are always happy

To have your over no matter what kind

Of bouquet bring

A big one

I was gonna say a small one.

Do you wish it was red?

You know, honey some things are bigger

you know so i think that makes up for

Well

didn't want the flowers to die

So got the fake ones

Oh they're fake

Like your love

Exactly

No no lasting forever

Got It! Understood

Okay well

That's close call

But I still support the relationship. And as long as you support my daughter, not becoming any sort of other profession

Right

Then

I will support your relationship, honey. Thank you

Perfect

Your hair's almost done

Think we've got that going

That is wonderful

Oh he'll just be the prettiest flower up there on that stage

And i'l be looking at you and thinking about myself being

Up there

Thinking about

Yeah, how many times do we have to go over the wrist?

All this makeup stuff here. Let me get that for you

Okay yeah so I was thinking maybe a little bit more neutral just so it doesn'take away from like the tracks

Sure but i don´think We should Go Neutral

I think what we should do is have a little bit of powder here. Let me see, let me see your nose

Okay there you go

Yeah perfect this is good

See your natural beauty shining through thiss just enhances it okay?

Okay

Yeah

That makes sense for sure

Do you think were gonna have time to finish the makeup

Of course! We hav all the tim in world

I'm just getting a lot of stress.

Are you distracted with your boyfriend here?

No, no!

i want him here

Yeah...

You know

You're giving her so much attention

and it's not really helping my anxiety

This is supposed to be MY day

And

Im trying divide between both equally

Do you think this makeup looks okay for theme

Do you not trust all of the work and the planning that I've put into this theme?

i worked on each theme for two weeks straight.

And thought about your hair, and your lashes

About this perfect little powder

Mom...I'm not judging whether or now

You're right

But just a little bit anxious

Because last year we didn't win

We putted in so much work

we did put in a lot of work, but I think that one girl cheated. So this time

we're going to be watching and making sure that they are following the rules

because everything that

We've done is perfect

Yeah honestly maybe

Maybe we should record Betty, just in case she cheats again.

Yes! That's a great idea

Yeah thank you baby

Aww

You're so supportive

He is so supportive

I love it that you have my mom back too

Yeah he really does

We both have our backs

That is really sweet

Your are very supportive

Don't want her mad at me

No no

Do not trust him

This never gets upset

Okay?

I am perfectly happy with everything that's going on, except for whatever Betty is doing.

Honestly...

...I will say

a big part of my anxiety is

you're spending so much time on my mom and

this supposed to be MY day too

My day more than hers

Is it?

Yes Mom

I'm trying to divide my attention equally between both of you.

P, please!

Okay? All right...

Put it wherever you want

Let me untie this from the couch

Don'think you should stress sweetheart

Flowers

Okay let's not get upset about the flowers

Honey he probably spent a good couple dollars on those okay

Oh my gosh, fine.

I was planning it for a long time

Yeah

You know babe

Im just little stressed out

and pent up

You're just anxious because you have whole stage show to do

but don't even think about i

Alright?

Your dance number ready

Its the Irish jig

One and two

This is perfect

We are gonna beat Betty

Thank you so much.

You and I, we're gonna win this!

We have to win this

Im going

Were gonna win

im

were

This is luck

i think

ill need a little help with this

Oh gosh of course

Whatever you need sweetie

Right ok

Yeah

Yes its perfect

Perfect dress

Honey

Don't step on the

Keep that tiara back

Dont step onto bedazzles

oh my gosh

alright mom

So sorry

Can she

put it

yeah

mhm

Oh, that'still looking great. I think so it was really just unfortunate

Babe i'm sorry

They are pretty they aren't what

But they are nice flowers

They're nice sure yeah absolutely

It was a really nic gesture

Yeah, just different color palette.

Maybe red white and blue is all I'm saying but you have till next year to figure it out

You know how much suck at holidays

No sweetheart you're doing just fine

Girls like pink

Yeah

Are they supposed be red? Like roses

That's a little more romantic

But its okay we have the Valentine Day pageant

He could bring Red Roses for the Valentine day pageants

Its not for awhile

but it gives you a lot of time to like, at least...

To actually yeah. You know to put something together

Write it in your notes actually

Oh that's great idea

I think thats'a good idea too

Maybe putting on the calendar or something?

That would be great

oh yeah like the calendar

Yeah

That makes sense

Did you did

make sure

they wrote

The rest

Of years pageant

In

On

Calendar

Y

Yeah

It sounds

Like

Your lying

to me, sweetheart. You know I'm going to find him

and going

Mom Yes of course that was a good girl you make sure that

everything is organized okay i mean

I work really hard in this family.

Yeah, you work so hard mom!

You totally wrote down every single one

and did it for the guests

You got the President's Day

We have Memorial day

Presidents' day

That is a lot

How could we even

differentiate it?

Instead of using red white blue colors

what can do

bedazzle

flag and turn into

a dress. No way! This is why I do this... Actually, well you're kind of cooked with that one

That's good idea You like that idea? Yeah

Okay

Don't want to offend anyone to wear flag as

A dress

You don' think

Um

As long it on the ground

So we end up on

The ground

And

Bedazzle

It completely

Oh yeah

All

The stripes

Right

Definitely

Bedazzle

Yeah

Thank

I think it's even more patriotic, the more jewels.

So for Easter do you think

i should have like for the swimsuit contest

two big easter eggs

just like my bikini

or a bunch of little ones making

so im going to back up on that

and let you know

as your mother

will not allow

enter the bikini portion

because its too sweaty

Mom

It is ok real little

But like, you know...

Let's have some respect okay?

You need to cover your body okay.

I think you should listen your mom babe

There we go thank you Ryan

Whose side are on babe

Uh i mean im trying be on both of

Your sides is that possible

No honestly

Its not even like it'll fine

Like its just a little bit skin

Theres nothing wrong with showing

Just A LITTLE BIT OF SKIN

Yeah but It has too one piece

yeah

I know you're not used to seeing me all sexy or whatever, but it'll be fine.

It's for the pageant like that is not super sexual

Do you think tha maybe

You have a better chance of winning if

you showed more skin?

i think so

Yeah

Well times have changed

Okay

So in my swimsuit competition

I won. Damn it!

i wore ankle to neck wetsuit

okay?

okay

and,I still won because of the smile

and the blowjobs that gave judges

so ,i didn't have show any skin

It was all way my wrist

Mom

you have be just a little bit

slutty

do u mean risqué

yeah

little bit risqué

whatever

nobody says Risque anymore

mom

It's not heft to say that?

She is nice.

I mean, it is okay for her skin

she can be talented and gorgeous

Honey!

I can get jiggy

Jiggy...

Chicky mom

What!?

Oh my god

You are so embarrassing

How am l embarrassing

honey

Honely

I have helped you with this

Year after year

We have won exactly

one and a half competitions

And

we are going

win more

This year

Do you know what

I do have a feeling we're going to win more than we have in the past.

You think so? Sweetheart!

It's been...I don't know,

We have like 60 more chances this year right

And yeah and also 50 of them for outfits and ideas

So you just need really think about the others

Right

Um what about for Presidents Day

Because that one is tough

Should i wear big top hat

I think you could wear a top hat and that like judges wig.

Oh my gosh, like the curly...

All right?

Have one in the closet

You do?!

That you can borrow

Okay your mother gets kind of freaky sometimes too

Ew mom

Please

Do not want to imagine him getting freaky

Not even in mine Washington wig

But yeah

Hey

Maybe we should work more

And then

Talent doesn't matter

Too much

but maybe we should just kind of,

just as a fallback.

You know?

Wait you want to change your talent

Honey you've been working on your Irish line dancing for years

I know

i just

get bored with it

because its been years

they always like

no

They completely expect me

To always do the dance

Well sure

But that

It honors our heritage

Right

Our heritage

And I feel like you've just gotten better and better at this dancing.

Yeah, look...

It'something that you always did during the pageants

and it is something that you have always won gold for

Maybe there are some talents thanks to which

You don't really know about because we're very open

What kind of other talents could she have?

She has a lot

She haves lots

Thank

Okay

There ar so many

Like what

Um, yodeling?

Oh is that the sound you make in the shower?!

Sometimes.

Honey I don't know if that's a talent or if that like...a problem

Mom!

What!?

It was definitely not problem

Okay alright

And so does my boyfriend

Really?? You like her yodelling right

Yeah

Okay

Alright

Well then we could try something like this but

But first let me get your yoga instructor

I could always do...

Only know four of those.

That sounds like fun!

Well, how would yoga be a good talent on stage?

Ah yoga!!

Yoga could maybe..

Maybe juggling

Oh juggling

Yeah that's

yeah that'd great if it were 1952

You would know right mom

Okay

And the jugglers never did well

They di what three

maybe four oranges

No one was impressed

Well i was thinking

fire-juggling

Like pyro

Okay, that would actually kind of be for myself last year.

Remember with the glue gun?

That's true

You might not want to do fire juggling if you can't even handle a

glue gun

But you've gotten better with that

What about bedazzled oranges on fire juggling

Oh my God

Wait

I like it when we work together

Honey

I do too, when we actually collaborate.

Yeah...I like it when we collaborate too

We're working together on these sorts of things

Oh gosh!

Watch out for your dress

This dress here might be a little bit loose

On your bust area

Really?

I was measuring it earlier.

Really?

Yeah,

i have a measuring tape somewhere

Oh no where on the...

No

Well

Was measuring earlier

Uh-huh

And

It might be

A little bit

Loose in your breast area

Sweetheart

You think so

Yeah

Maybe

You'll grow into

Ya

Amine

Is

Originally

Very small

and

Much bigger

Boobs

Than

Do

Honey

We don't have to call out each other's body parts

Okay

I mean

That is very appropriate

Yes

Alright

Don' think

Its appropriate

Both

Have really nice

Tits

Do you really?

Oh, that'so nice. How do you like her tits in this dress

That is SO inappropriate!

I'm sorry should not have asked that

No

Okay

You're right

Like if we even think about either of our tits right now

Yeah

We're trying to have a serious pageant conversation about pageants

So

need

be doing

instead

And crafts

and crafts

That i s also

really important

Besides

the fire orange juggling

just can't

think

any other

talents

What

What is Betty's talent, usually?

Besides peeing a bitch.

That was good one mom!

Thanks honey

We're gonna beat her this year sweetheart

No she usually like...

I don't know

She like

She does something different every single year

She does

Like she likes to pretend

that has all these talents

Figure skating

Like if you bought an entire ice rink last year

It was crazy

Do you think that why did won

do think it ice ring

what we brought on stage

Again mom

They dont care about talent

Okay, okay. Maybe because she wore that slutty little bathing suit

You might have a point

Yeah I think she should show some skin too

You think so too?

It can't hurt right

If you were judge what would be looking at

What kind of talent would impress you

Dont say blue jobs

Because thats inappropriate

So i'm not supposed to look her tits

Any sort or skins

Okay, so like a shoulder shimmy?

Yeah. An ankle-shoulder shimmy dance

Okay! Maybe you should show more ankle at these pageants sweetheart

Yeah

I don'think that's where i was going with that but

This is very sweet

That your not vulgar like those other boys

He really polite

A nice guy

He is a gentleman.

That's true

Aww

Yeah, you did pick up good one with this boy

You know he brought flowers

I was so much better than the last one

Yeah

The other one didn't even know what bedazzling was

Can you believe that?

What are crying for

Please listen

Wait

Your didn' tknow

What

Sorry baby

Why do have to tell her

Of course

of course

i knew it meant

just

never done before

Didn''t understand

craft

What goes into it? The years of hard work, the history.

The storied history of medicine

Maybe you could teach Me Mrs Locke

I mean

i don't have all time in world

because It is such an art

but will do my best

Okay

Will to deal with this worthless

man who doesn´T even know

Oh My God

Mom

what

What did say

I said when you pick a partner, you pick one who knows our crafts.

Mom! It's your craft not our crafts

Anyway...I guess bedazzling isn't everything

Im open to that concept

Ive never heard her say that before

im just trying be more open minded these days

Its difficult when this was my entire life and all i cared about

So, and I just want to leave some space to maybe it isn't. Oh this is hard for me

but maybe it's not everything that you care about

Do you mean tha?

Is there something else

besides architecture because

thats a garbage thing

Well like

I do like archaeology.

Archaeology?

And then

i love,

love arcs

you

Like arcs and the ology of them

Okay

Yeah

yeah

get into this

okay

yeah

Like the animals on the ark

Yeah

our character

are

Oh a character

Arc

No all

All

all

ARCs

anything that has an

ARC

enjoy

Yea

Alright

Well

again

can

get

into

tha

Do

You

Really

mean

it

Archaeol

is

The

study

Of

Artifacts

No, it's arcs. Why would it have an arc in there? Anyway that is okay you should go back to school

It was a good thing your really pretty babe

And you get some nice flowers

What did those represent

That wasn't like how fake

Forever

I could see the two of them together forever

He just has learn what archeology means

All of the above.

Oh my gosh, I really can't believe the pageants tonight!

Oh...I can wait

You know every single time we do this

Every 72 times it's like a first time

Aww..Im so glad you feel that way sweetie

Really truly

Yeah i mean its just

So much effort and work

We keep not winning

But eventually will right?

Yeah

I really, truly believe in us this year.

What was that baby?

Thank you so much!

You'really my biggest cheerleader baby

Besides your mother

Yes mom

There we go

But you can be the second biggest cheerleader okay

Yeah, you're more like a... what do they call them? A momager.

Okay is that nice term to support you right

It means your the best mother ever

You are not overbearing

Your very kind and selfless

And put me and my needs first

I know

That'sweet but i just want it be amidst of

So maybe im not thankful

you were so self aware. I think therapy is really helping you

Hey sweetie, it is! It's telling me what

am which

self absorbed and obsessed with living through

But um but

don't know

Well

okay

going to probably have

start in like 20 years

Yeah

You're welcome

Of course

Uh huh

Hi babe

She has the best mom ever

I know, i really do.

Sometimes we have our struggles but you know after so many years with you

like...I really feel like

We've found some common ground

Definitely have

As long as your exactly perfect and do everything that tell me to

Right?

Yeah

Sounds a little controlling

What!? You think it's controlling

Well..i mean

Feel like u got lot of opinions

About my mother

You know, I just don't know when to shut my mouth sometimes.

That's okay! You'll learn

Oh ohmygosh!! My shot!!!

Yeah you cannot forget it

I can not forget the shot

There it is

Yep

Wow its soft

Uh huh

Yeah

yeah

think we have your perfect outfit all planned together

So too

Yeah, it's the bedazzled dress. This lovely fur that we'll have over top of it?

Yeah! What do you think Do you like

It

You think

I love how he bedazzles the shawls

yeah

Yes

Very

Bedazzles

The red white and blue is perfect

That true

Hey

That works with our theme

Red White an Blue

Honey look how smarty

He

Is

Wow

So

Smart

Your so

Smart

Okay

I take back how angry was about the bedazzling thing. So,

get a little heated sometimes

Oh it's okay

Yeah

i say dumb things all the time

That is true

You're self aware too! Are you in therapy?

yeah no but

probably should be

He seems pretty self aware

Yeah

What about paleontology

Oh that my favorite

Well that paleons

Yes

It studying paleon

Oh, no. It's the study of fossils actually

No that sounds nothing like it

Paleo is like people that are paleos?

Yeah

Like the diet

Yeah

Diet

Like vegetarian paleo

That not what i mean

Its'ology

oh my gosh

Its its ology

Uh huh

Okay

Im starting to pick up what she putting down

yea

thats

The diet

Tha you study

Think

Speaking

Of diets

Was thinking

Being a

Vegetarian

Yea

Were

You

Yeah, okay. Never I love me way too much you do sweetie yeah i guess so

So we try and eat healthy in this family

That's really important

Yeah

Because you have to have

energy for dancing these jigs

For dancing

But not doing the dancing anymore

Well honey

You don't even know how

To juggle yet

You haveto learn

Howto

Do that

First

Juggling is just putting one thing into

The next hand

Like it literally like

One hand

Into the next

Right

Right? That's what juggling is, right.

I think so...I can'think of any other talents that she could do

So we're not really sure

We don' t want to do the yodeling

You know that

What is wrong with yodelling

Have you heard her yawn

Yeah

It like a screechy thing

it doesn''it

Screechy

Honey!

Screenche

Never gonna beat anyone

With screenching noises

Okay

Don ''T thing

Do u believe in my Yodel

Well no

No

Okay

And am right

This whole point

is that we're not arguing with me because I know how this all works.

Okay,

you can't be an archaeologist?

No

How many paleontologists

no

You can do the Paleo thing

No

You

Can'

Do any of those things

and

yo

know why

Because

how

many

gold ribbon

medals did

i win for my pageantry

My

God

Thank

y

We

re going

to talk

about

it

again

315

We won 315, right?

Thank you! I know.

You say it before every single pageant

If only we could get a solid 2

Maybe you could get another half of the win and that would count as two

Yeah

So you won the one

And tha was for what Easter Sunday pageants

Yeah yeah

I think it was, believe it was Easter Yolk.

And then the other half

Was for St Patrick's Day

That is when

When they gave the judges

The blowjobs

You did

and if you had given better

Blowjobs

Maybe would have won that extra half

Oh my god

Uh huh

Yeah

Well

You can always try harder

But your so sweet

Aww

So sweet

He always picks up

My crown

Awww

No

Well

I guess,

i can give Ryan a bit of better chance with you right like

I should,

i should be a little bit sweeter.

Are you sure? He's really is he

trying so hard aren't you got flowers

and beautiful flower yeah

and

He did fix your crown and he loves all the G's.

He doesn't know much about them, but

yeah

But you try

And we love that

You try

No problem

She totally agrees

Yeah

You are being a good boyfriend

Yeah

I'm not

Good like pageant boyfriend

Yeah

Totally

Like

The best

Honestly

Like

i couldnt ask for any more better

Truly

We'll just

you know, get better flowers at some point.

Yeah

Because you're such a good girlfriend

Oh honey we have to get here

Are you late?

Yeah well no she's not gonna be lat

No daughter of mine is like

Here this sweetheart

What about the dress

You know put this on

Remember

Your going show more skin babe

I think this will work

Really

Do u think that its'a good idea

Well let me fix your make up

Let see

Oh this shine will be perfect for the judges. They'll see it all the way on stage

Really? I'm so proud of you

Thank you

Honey, put on your panties okay

It's not being inappropriate

Okay

There we go

How do i look

Yeah

Think this is perfect

We'l make sure a little shine for the judges to see

On stage and maybe bedazzle your nipples

That sounds great

I know, we are a great team.

Mom!

Love you too sweetie

Okay let's go

Let get ready

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