Original subtitles

Hi, I'm Jason Seaver.

I'm a psychiatrist.

I've spent the last 15 years helping people with their problems. And I'm

Seaver. I've spent the last 15 years helping our kids with problems even

wouldn't believe.

Now Maggie has gone back to work as a reporter for the local newspaper.

Jason has moved his cactus into the house so he can be there for the kids.

They're great kids.

Most of the time. And the rest of the time?

We love them anyway.

Yeah.

Unbelievable.

Show me that smile again.

Don't waste another minute on your crying.

We're nowhere near the end.

The best is that it didn't begin.

Oh, as long as we got each other.

As long as we keep on giving, we can take anything that comes our

way. Baby, rain or shine, all the time, we got each other

sharing the laughter.

Hello.

When do they outgrow a skateboard?

When you buy them a Camaro.

Yeah.

Okay.

Bye.

Gonna see Springsteen, huh?

Yep, tomorrow night.

It's gonna be awesome.

Ladies and gentlemen, the boss.

Wait, wait. I thought the Springsteen concert was sold out.

Sold out?

Carol,

to a man with connections, nothing is ever sold out.

That just happened to be Seth Jameson, nephew of the man whose brother -in -law

owns the hot dog concession at the Coliseum.

Wow.

So did you get tickets?

Did I get tickets? Of course I got tickets.

You did?

In Springsteen?

Well, no.

To the Ice Capade.

But I got a very good seat.

And two free hot dogs.

Talk about connections. Are those all beef dogs?

It's too bad about the concert. You must be disappointed.

I still got a couple other things going. I'll get the tickets.

All right.

This is it.

Hello.

Yeah, talk to me.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, I'll see you.

No dice?

No, Jerry was sure he'd be able to get those tickets from his friend Cheech,

but... Cheech?

Jason, our son, knows people named Cheech.

Ah, Maggie, you can't judge somebody on the basis of a name.

Anyway, Mike, you were saying?

Yeah, well, Cheech's parole officer didn't think it'd be such a good idea to

hand him the scalpel tickets to post to the trial.

Good judgment there, Cheech.

We're sorry, honey.

That's all right.

I still got one more shot.

Yeah, Jimsky.

Yes, Mike.

Yeah, look, I gotta have those tickets.

Yes, look, all from anything they want.

What?

My jacket?

My leather jacket? The one that smells like actual cattle?

He delivered papers for two years to get that jacket. He loves that jacket.

I love that jacket.

Of course, I never had a jacket that nice.

Okay, okay, you can have the jacket.

Oh, come on, Jimmy. Oh.

Oh.

Look, I hate to even ask Jerry that.

Yeah, all right. Look, call me right back.

They wanted to date with Jerry's sister.

Trixie?

She's only 11.

I said no.

Say, Mike, you don't really want to part with that jacket, do you?

No, but Dad, there's no way that Bruce is going to play 10 miles from my house

and I'm going to miss him.

Dad, I've got to go to that concert.

Ready?

Yep.

What?

That's impossible.

Yeah.

Okay.

See ya.

Well? Somebody offered him a house.

A house?

Well, it was just for a weekend, but... I'm still out of our league.

Unless... Mike.

Uh -uh.

Okay, fine.

Hey, Mike.

Well, at least you still have that jacket, right?

Who cares? It smells like a dead cow.

Mom, Mom, Mom! I just saw a mouse in the attic this big!

Was this a mouse or a small sheep?

Well, it had beady little eyes and a long tail and one like this.

That's a sheep, all right.

Okay, okay. Where did I put those mouse traps?

What are you going to do with the mouse traps, Mom?

Well, I'll be honest with you, Carol. I plan to use them to trap Mike.

Won't I kill them?

Hopefully.

Carol,

a mom's got to do what a mom's got to do.

Son, bring me my camembert. All right, we're going with the big guns.

No, Mom, I mean, they're cute, corn with little creatures.

Carol, these are the same guys who carried the plague all through Europe

the 10th century and killed millions of people.

That was a thousand years ago, Mom. How long are you going to hold a grudge?

Michael? Go ahead.

Try it. Try to give me one good reason to go on living, Mom.

The solid gold dancers.

At least Dad's not here. I mean, he'd really try to cheer me up. Ah, the

I mean, he always acts like he's gonna, like he's gonna be real sympathetic. And

then before you know it, he turns on you.

Mike, Mike, Mike.

I find that at times like these, it's always best to keep a little perspective

on life.

At least he didn't give you that line about how rough he had it when he was

age.

No, no, that's what he always says.

Mike, no, I'm not going to give you that line about how rough I had it when I

was your age, but I think that you should be aware that historically people

had it rougher than this.

Hi. Hi.

We have mice.

Yep.

And if I'm not back in 24 hours, call a cat.

Mike, Mike, Mike.

Still feeling pretty low, huh, pal?

Dad, I'm feeling fine. Let's just drop it, okay?

Ah, come on, come on. I know what you're going through.

Yeah, sure, Dad.

No, I do. I really do. You know, I didn't want to bring it up this morning

depress you, but I have seen Springsteen in concert.

You have?

Mm -hmm.

Ten years ago?

Really? What was it like?

Amazing.

I mean, the guy completely blows your doors off. Oh, God, I don't want to hear

this. He made me feel so... Please, Dad.

I could have just walked out of that concert in a hitchhike right across the

country. Stop!

Sorry.

Mike, if you had one wish right now, one thing, what would it be?

Dad, I'm really not in the mood for this. Come on, Mike. Come on, come on,

on.

I mean, if you had one thing that would make you the happiest guy in the world,

what would it be?

A solid gold dancer.

All right, two wishes.

For our tickets to the Springsteen concert.

Well, would Seventh Row be all right? Come on, now, don't toy with my

Huntington dry cleaning.

Three shirts, clean breath, no starch.

Thanks, Dad. There's my third wish.

Okay, okay. Sorry, wrong pocket.

How about these?

I can't... Dad, do you know what these are?

These are Springsteen tickets.

Really?

Well, even how'd you get them?

Well, Mike, your mom and I made a big decision.

We could either afford to send you to college or we could get those tickets.

What do you think?

I think you made the right choice.

I can't believe it. Two tickets to Springsteen.

What if I call Jerry? He's going to freak.

Hey, wait a minute. Show some compassion.

No way. When Jerry finds out we're gone, it's going to kill him.

We don't want to rub it in.

Right. Right.

Hey, Mike, you don't really mind going to the concert with your old man?

No. No.

You sure?

Yeah, Dad, this is going to be great.

I mean, you don't want to take one of your buddies?

No. You want to take Jerry?

No.

Peggy Zielinski?

No. No, Dad, I want to go with you, really.

Well, all right, then let's call Jerry and rub it in.

Just kidding.

I swear it, man. I have tried everywhere. There is not one more ticket

Hey, Seaver, did you score tickets?

Did I say I was going to score the tickets?

Voila!

Outrageous, man. Where did you get these?

I have my connections.

No, Mikey, Buddy, Brodsky.

Just, uh, how many tickets you got here?

Just two.

What, you think it's going to take you, Bonehead?

It's going to take me, right, Mikey?

Sorry, guys.

No can do.

Okay. Okay, I can respect that. Now, let me guess. Um, Peggy Zielinski, right?

Oh, man, what an opportunity.

Have you ever seen a girl after a Springsteen concert?

They turn into wild animals.

Have you asked her yet?

Well, no, not exactly. I mean, Peggy wants me, man, but she just doesn't do

for me.

Look, I can be late for English.

Gotta go. I'll be late for English. Gotta go.

Come on, Seaver. You barely speak English.

Who are you going with, man?

My father.

What?

My father.

Who's my father? Wait, is that that new weird kid from Pakistan?

No, man, I'm going with my father.

You're gonna go see Springsteen with your father, man?

Hey, my father's not like a father, okay?

He's a cool guy.

Yeah, he's cool.

Last time I was over there, he was waxing the floor and saying he puffed

magic dragon.

Don't be a jerk, all right, boner?

I'm telling you, Seaver, it's weird.

Look, it's not weird, okay? I mean, just because you're too big a jerk to do

anything with your father doesn't mean there's anything weird or uncool about

it.

You guys be the weirdest to anybody and you're dead meat.

of tonight's crowd is its broad age range. And if I'm not mistaken, evidence

this cross -generational appeal is right here.

Excuse me, young man.

Did you attend this evening's concert with your father?

Who wants to know?

All of the tri -state area. This is Newsline New York.

Sir,

is this your son?

Hey, the big fella here? Not only is this my son, this is my best buddy.

Tell me, sir, isn't it unusual for a father and a son to attend a rock and

concert together?

No, no way. No, not in our family. Not in any family that loves each other,

right?

Young man, anything you'd like to say to your

friends at school?

I was just upstairs in the attic.

Hey, that's great, Mom.

All the cheese is gone and all the traps are sprung, but there's no mice in

them.

Really? Carol, I have nothing personal against these mice.

It's just that my children's health is more important to me than theirs is.

Fine.

Just go ahead and kill them.

But where does it stop, Mom?

Today it's mice.

One day.

Killing a mailman's a federal offense, Mom.

Well, at least she didn't overreact.

Hey, Mike.

How was the... concert?

Is there an irate children's convention upstairs?

What?

What's with Mike?

How should I know?

Didn't say a word to me all the way home.

Home?

I guess he thinks I embarrassed him or something.

Why? What did you do?

I didn't do anything.

He's overreacting.

Well, we got interviewed by a television crew down there and... Never mind.

I'd really rather not talk about it.

Oh, well.

I'm sure it'll blow over.

By tomorrow.

Or the next day.

So, how's my brother the big TV star?

Hey, knock it off, Carol. I've been getting that all day.

Hello, everybody. This is Newsline New York. We're here with Mike and Jason

Sievert, two really cool guys.

I asked you to go with me to the movie Saturday, so you know what I did?

What? I asked my dad.

Hey, Boner, you're a real funny guy.

Hey, Mikey, listen.

Maybe you and your dad could double with me and my dad some night.

Mikey, you can tell us.

Did you get luckier with that goodnight kiss all you got?

You guys are a lot funnier since your lobotomies.

Whoa.

What a family.

The guy dates his dad and gets his little sister to stick up for him. You

this could make the news, too.

What a guy. We're buddies. I love this guy.

I need your help.

I'm just not political.

Ben, there comes a time when principle alone compels us to take a stand.

I'll give you a quarter.

A dollar.

Fifty cents.

Jason, tell Carol what these lucky mice have won.

Well, Maggie, in addition to having their lives spared, our furry little

will be whisked away for a fun -filled, all -expense -paid two -week vacation

to... Disneyland!

Yeah, where they will meet the big cheese themselves.

You guessed it, Mickey Mouse!

my kids.

You check the libraries. I'll check the museum.

Why is he making such a federal case out of this?

You know, he didn't speak to me last night.

Gave me the cold shoulder this morning. Now he's two hours late.

Jason, Jason, Jason.

I find that at times like these, it's good to keep a little perspective on

things.

Oh, honey, I'm sure he's over it by now.

And I'm no psychiatrist.

If you'll excuse me, I have to go tuck in my... You

did get your mother's nose.

Okay, sorry, dumb joke.

No, no, you're left right, Dad.

Hey, Mike.

I am sorry.

Okay? I know you feel I embarrassed you, and I'm sorry.

Yeah, sure. Great, Dad.

Mike!

I'm apologizing.

Don't you think we should get this out in the open?

What, you mean like on national television?

You know, I paid a lot of money for those tickets, and that was so you could

to the concert. And I think you're being a little self -absorbed about this. I'm

being self -absorbed? Dad, you gave me noogies on the evening news.

Well, some people's parents locked them in a closet for seven years.

You got it real rough.

Your father likes you. Yeah, gross.

Goodies.

I was showing my feelings for you, Mike.

We have feelings for Mom, too.

You don't go showing them in front of the whole tri -state area.

You just don't know. I mean...

The guys at school... Oh, come on, Mike. What do you care what those guys say?

That's easy for you to say. You don't know what it's like.

I mean, they laughed at me because I went with you.

But I defended you. I said, my dad's a cool guy.

And then what did you do? You slobber all over me on Newsline New York.

All right.

Okay, Mike, I am sorry.

Maybe we shouldn't have gone to the concert together.

That's not what I'm saying.

No, and maybe you just should have taken a girl.

Dad, you're not listening to me.

Look.

I'm taking a big risk by telling you this.

But I actually like doing stuff with you.

I do. I mean, I was sitting there watching Springsteen with my dad and a

other people's parents.

Don't even know what a Springsteen is.

And all through the concert, I was thinking, hey, you know, this is really

great.

Yeah.

Well, you know, I was thinking pretty much the same thing.

Well, maybe there's a way that we can both think that without letting the

free world in on it.

Well, I guess I did lose control a little.

Okay, a lot.

That's all right, Dad.

I guess Bruce has that effect on people. I guess maybe next time we should see

someone a little less dynamic.

Well, I hear the Osmonds are coming to town.

Nah.

Your mother and I are in the next room we're trying to read you guys think you

could turn down that