Original subtitles

I'm ready to go. It's about time.

What movie did you pick?

The one where the black cop dresses up like his fat grandma and beats up all

criminals.

Come on. No, Angie, this time she breaks up a terrorist cell with nothing but

her purse and a rolling pin.

Can't we see the one about the scientist fighting global warming?

As long as one of the scientists is dressed like a sassy black grandma.

I got your hybrid right here. Half beat down, half whoop ass.

Fine. Just go online and find out what time the movie's playing.

What are the Bill Gates?

What the hell are you doing to my computer?

I'm putting in a better graphics card so I can play my new video game. You're

supposed to be doing your homework.

It was too hard.

I've almost got it.

Oh, crap.

I guess that goes in the broken pile.

Max, you know what's on this computer? All my business files, our family

and a journal of my private thoughts.

What have you done, Max?

Now your mom has to tell me her private thoughts. Thanks a lot.

We need it. a new one anyway?

This thing's like a hundred years old.

Hey, it's two years old and it costs a thousand dollars. You know how long it

takes me to earn that? All right, sorry.

Can't you just put a new one on the credit card?

And how do you think we pay for the credit cards?

You put it on another credit card.

I told you he listened to us.

What's all this junk?

Max, took it upon himself to upgrade our computer, and now it's broken.

Hmm. So, uh, what's your bad parenting move this time?

Give him a crayon, let him draw a picture of how he's feeling?

No.

I'll tell you what we're gonna do.

He's gonna learn how hard it is to make $1 ,000.

You're out of school next week? You're gonna come and work at the factory with

me.

That's my vacation.

Mom! George, he's too young to be working down at the factory.

Hell, the guys down there are pretty rough.

Look, there's been one stabbing, and that was over a woman.

That could happen at Wall Street, maybe not with a sharpened screwdriver, but...

You know what I mean. Can I see you in my office for a second? Yeah, what's

going on? It's down above my...

All

my dreams.

No, the low rider.

The low rider is a little higher.

Hey,

George. Do you mind if I give you some parenting advice?

Why would I mind?

You never had any kids or a pet that's lived longer than a couple of weeks? Go

for it.

Hey, that turtle died of a rare disease, all right?

Yeah, they got a cure for that now. It's called turtle food. Hey,

hey, we're talking about Max, all right? He's been working harder than everybody

all week.

I think you can ease up on him. Look, Max is going to keep busting his butt

until he admits that earning the thousand dollars is harder than he

Hey, Dad.

Me and the guys just finished loading these trucks.

Yeah, well, it's pretty hard work, huh?

Anything you're ready to say?

Nope. Just tell me what to do before Fancy here cracks the whip.

I heard that down on the loading dock. What does that mean?

Hey, follow me to the cage.

Okay, I want you to organize every nut, bolt, and screw. And if you find a dead

mouse, put it in the bucket.

There's dead mice in there? Well, we had a cat that ate them.

And then something ate the cat.

If I were you, I'd keep your back against the wall because obviously he

like visitors.

Hey, George.

George.

I just want to say that your son is... So adorable.

Obviously, he gets his good looks from his papacito.

What have I told you about sexual harassment on the floor?

Okay, so I'm not on the floor.

Lopez, party of one. Your table is ready.

Gina, it's called men -o -paws, not men -o -keep -going.

Angie, what are you doing here?

Well, I just wanted to stop by and make sure that you weren't working Max too

hard. He's learning a lesson.

Hey.

Don't undercut me in front of them. We have to present a universal front.

It's a united front.

You see? Get it out. Get it all out!

Hey, Mom.

How you doing, honey?

You know, Dad was right.

You've got to work hard to make a thousand bucks.

You're welcome.

Hey, the next time you want to buy $200 shoes, be careful. I'll put you in the

case cleaning out the rat bucket.

working here was a good idea.

And now maybe you understand why we want you to do well in school.

That way you don't have to kill yourself doing this kind of hard work when you

grow up.

Are you kidding?

This is a great job.

I want to quit school and work at the factory forever.

George?

Don't panic. Just follow my lead.

Max, listen, your mother has something she wants to say to you.

I'm so mad I can't even talk to you right now.

To him, to him.

I know you had a good time working at the factory, but it's not your future.

Could you please talk some sense into your son?

Max, there is no way you're dropping out of school.

But I have to start making money right now.

Social Security is a pyramid scheme being gutted by the baby boomers.

Do you have any idea what the hell you're saying?

No.

Somebody knocked over the radio on the loading dock. It's stuck on AM.

You have worked too hard to quit now. You are going to finish high school and

to college.

But the factory was good enough for Dad and Grandma, and they have this awesome

truck. that brings food right to the parking lot with the horn like that. Da

-da -da -da, da -da -da -da -da, da -da -da -da -da.

A truck that brings food?

That's your best argument?

Wait a minute. You have to admit, the roach coach is pretty cool when you

start.

Then you order a spicy breakfast burrito in the morning and you go missing for

an hour and a half in the afternoon.

You're like that all day.

You know what else I like?

When I finish something, people say, nice job, Max. And that makes me feel

I never feel that way at school.

If you keep trying hard, you'll get that feeling from school, too.

I always try hard, and I never feel good.

It'll be worse in college.

I like going to the factory and hanging out with Dad.

What's wrong with that?

can't let this happen.

Maybe we should listen to what he's saying, Angie.

What are you getting at?

You know, maybe college isn't right for Max.

I mean, we tried to help him with school and that hasn't worked out.

The kid I saw this week was a different Max. He was working hard and he was

happy. We talked about this.

Don't you want him to do better than we did? Yeah, I do, but he has to want to

go to college too.

What was the last book that Max read on his own? Let me give you a hint.

He didn't read it on a train, and he didn't read it on a plane.

I'm not saying he has to go to an Ivy League school, but there's junior

and trade school.

He likes to take apart computers. Maybe he can learn to put them back together.

Okay, what's wrong with working at the factory? I did all right.

We have a house, three cars. Would we be in this much debt if I wasn't

successful?

Honey, you did great.

But we can give him options that you didn't have.

Trouble with Max again?

He wants to spend the rest of his life working at the factory with George. Oh,

thank God he found something. I was worried about that boy.

You see, it's not just me. Your father sees it, too.

He's not going back to that factory.

Yes, he is. Look, he hasn't paid off the computer.

Look, Max can't drop out of high school, but after he graduates, if he wants to

work at the factory, he can do it. There, I can keep an eye on him. No.

I have never given up on Max, and I am not going to start now.

That's why he's potty trained, knows his ABCs, and he can wear pants with

zippers.

He still gets caught, Angie. He still gets caught!

Hey, George,

it's Friday. Who are you going to pick as Employee of the Week?

Hey, I nominate Max.

I made you employee of the week because everybody's going to think I'm doing it

just because you're my best friend.

But he's your son.

I know. I'm so proud.

So you're okay with me working at the factory?

I made you employee of the week, didn't I? Congratulations.

What do I win?

A night with Gina.

Man, watch the jokes, man. That's my kid.

Shouldn't a night without Gina be the prize?

All right, that's enough.

Mom, what are you doing here? I thought you were looking for a job. I am.

I'm getting ready for an interview.

By drinking shots and beer?

Because I'm applying here.

And I want to show them that I am acquainted with all of their products.

Boy, seeing Max here really brings back a lot of memories.

I remember when you were little, I would bring you here after work.

Yeah, the difference is I'm taking him home for dinner.

What was wrong with eating here?

Mom, the celery out of your Bloody Mary is not dinner.

And the little plastic sword this big is not a Robin Hood play set. I would let

that... You know what? A napkin is not a tent, and a flexi -straw is not a

snorkel. There's nothing sadder than a child without an imagination.

Yeah, how about a child who almost drowns when his straw snorkel won't

surface? I like that.

I hear that the princess is not happy about Max working in the factory.

She thinks he should go to college, but, you know, I'm not so sure.

Look, you are right, and Angie's wrong.

She's one of those idiots who thinks that, you know, your kid can grow up to

anything they want. Oh, I want to be president. Guess what?

There's only one president, and there are millions of factory workers.

Pick a freaking target you can hit.

There is nothing wrong with Max having his future locked in.

Hey, nice shot, Max.

Rack him up, Ernie. Hold on, Mr. Ernie.

Mr. Employee of the Week.

There we are. All right.

How long does it take to rack balls, Ernie?

That's what I was doing.

Thanks, buddy.

You don't remember my name, do you?

Nope.

so they match my tank.

Why don't you paint a face on it so the guy thinks he's dating sisters?

You can jump on him while he's flirting with the pretty one.

All right, everyone, I got an announcement to make.

Is it employee that we...

next week off, so here's your thing.

Actually, we're all taking next week off.

They're automating the factory and we're all losing our jobs to robots.

Oh, damn it!

Hey!

I say we go over to their bar and kick some robot ass!

Are you crazy?

You want to go to the Robario at this time of night?

the factory for 30 years. I don't know anything else.

I'm sorry, Max, but all the unskilled labor is going to Martians.

Damn illegal aliens.

Well, I guess I could always go back to dancing.

I've got the same body that I had back in 07.

1907 or 2007?

Answer is yes.

I could use a pool boy.

Sure. Why not?

Max, what are you doing?

I have no options, Dad.

Thanks a lot.

Hey, I'm heading back. Thanks for lunch, George.

Where's Max?

Oh, Frank gave him a ride back to work.

Everything okay?

I gotta get him out of that factory.

George, what's going on?

It's weird, man. I had a vision, man. I saw into the future.

Oh, hey, what happens to me?

Do I get a wife and wind up happy?

You marry a rich swimsuit bottle.

Oh, yeah.

It's a dude.

How rich?

Congratulations.

I added up your hours.

Paid off the computer. You learned your lesson. You're fired.

Fired?

You made me employee of the week. That's just a title to keep people happy.

You really think your mom is the world's greatest wife? There's that little

trophy that the car washed.

Now go.

I don't get it. Your mom was right, Max. You need to have options.

Fine. But the day I graduate high school, I'm coming back. And you can't

me.

Hey, Max.

Max!

Maybe you need to hear this from somebody else. Ernie. What's going on,

You know how there's always rumors that the factory's closing?

What would you do if that really happened?

Well, I guess if the factory closed down, I'd have to move back in with my

folks. I don't know how to do anything else. Hey, did I just hear you say the

factory's closing down? No. Just talking about how there's always rumors that

the factory's closing. Well, I never heard those rumors. If I lose this job,

screwed. Who's losing their job? Well, maybe all of us. The rumors are true.

rumors are true.

What rumors?

The factory's closing. Rosie! Yes?

I didn't say that!

I gotta know, George.

I mean, if I gotta go back to dancing, I gotta get my snake back from my sister.

Max, if she'd got an education, she wouldn't be panicked about losing her

Oh, my God!

We're losing our jobs!

Not closing. It's a misunderstanding.

Please, everybody, go back to work.

Dad, why did everyone get so scared?

First, they probably pictured Gina dancing.

Second, look, they didn't have the opportunity that you have to get an

and have choices.

You see how freaked out they got?

You want that to be you?

No. You're lucky, Mac.

Your daddy's a very smart man.

Talk to you in a minute?

Sure.

Well, that was crazy out there, huh?

I tried to teach Max a lesson, and boom, everybody went nuts.

How'd you find out?

How'd I find what out?

Just got bought out by a big Mexican corporation, Aeromayan.

They're cutting everybody loose, moving the factory down to Mexico.

The rumors are true? Oh, yeah. They backed up the peso wagon and let me go

Sorry. Sorry, George.

What are we all supposed to do?

Look, I feel bad, but it's business, George.

Look, I better go break the noose, everybody.

George, you've been a hell of a manager.

Wherever you end up, they're going to be lucky to have you.

Thanks for everything.

Everyone's still freaking out.

I think I want to go to college.

That's great, Mac.

You've been a hell of a son.

Wherever you end up, they'll be lucky to have you.

Thanks for everything.

Why isn't anybody working?

What's the point, man? The factory's closing down. We all need to find new

There's nothing out there, George.

Look, I'm freaked out about finding a job, too, but this factory is still

running, and we still have orders to get out, and we're going to fill those

orders because we take pride in our work. Yeah, well, pride is not going to

my lights on.

That's okay, Gina, because I was getting light does not look good on you.

Well, there's nothing in the paper for me.

Time to move to Plan B.

If the factory's moving to Mexico, then I'm going with it.

Ernie, they're only hiring Mexican citizens.

Well, then I'll sneak across the border.

I'll hide in a truck if I have to.

Okay, I'll hide in a truck.

Nobody cares if you go that way.

Everybody listen.

Everybody please get back to work.

What are you doing here, Mom? You don't work here anymore.

Well, I just came to gloat.

Notice anything different about me?

You didn't shave your back today?

Wayne bought this for me.

It makes you look like a high -priced hooker.

Thank you, Gina.

I feel like a high -priced hooker.

Thanks to this gentleman right here.

Hey, the rent -owned furniture king needs a rent -owned queen.

Hey, who's that with Jen?

Maybe it's a guy from Mexico who bought the factory. Maybe the layups are

starting now.

No way.

They promised us three more weeks of work.

George, that's what these sleazy business guys do.

We tell you... They tell you you got a few more weeks, and then they kick you

out early so you don't get a chance to steal.

Baby, if you see anything you like, take it now.

I'm going down swinging.

I'm going to tell this guy he just can't take over our factory and give our jobs

to Mexicans. This is America.