All language subtitles for George Lopez s04e19 Grand Slam

Dad? Hey.

What are you doing down here?

Oh, I was on the chair last night.

You and Mom had a fight?

Were you being emotionally distant
again?

What does that mean anyway?

It means that I'm not fascinated by
every little detail of your mother's

That muffin only has seven carbs? Wow!

The trick is to say wow. It's like a
magic little word that makes it seem

you're interested.

You know, it seems no matter how many
times I do laundry, the basket's always

full. Wow!

Did you teach your son to wow me?

You know about the wow? I have for 11
years.

Wow.

That one was real.

I didn't hear you come to bed last
night.

I had to keep an eye on Carmen and
Jason. I fell asleep down here.

You know it's hard for you having Jason
live with us, but you can't sleep on

that chair for the next five weeks.

Look, I don't know how you can sleep at
all as you know that Carmen's

boyfriend's in the house. Honey, it's
fine. He's on the couch. She's in her

room.

That means they're only 20 feet apart.

Think about it, Angie. He's over six
feet tall. He does three cartwheels.

there.

He fixed the landing. We're
grandparents.

You're being... ridiculous nothing's
gonna happen you're damn right nothing's

gonna happen because he's got to get
past me to get to her bedroom and

gets past me not even a fly there's

nothing in your hand i'm so fast i
already released it well

can't jason just use the other stairs in
the living room i'd like to see him try

Remember that electric shock pad we
bought to keep the dog off the couch?

It's on the third step.

Oh, crap!

Don't you think you should have warned
your son?

I did.

You said it was the third step!

From the bottom!

Oh, got it.

Morning. How'd you sleep, Jason?

Not so good.

I kept having this dream that someone
was standing over me saying, give me a

reason, Vato.

Vato's curious.

He's very curious. Sounds like some sort
of ethnic term, huh?

Man.

Oh, did I miss breakfast?

I just rolled out of bed and came down.

Jason, I forgot you were still...

girl we see every morning with the eye
boogers and the nasty breath.

No one talk to me till I have my
waffles.

I think you look great, Carmen.

Oh, thank you.

I've never seen you in the morning. You
look so cute with that hat.

No, I like it all messed up.

Yeah, how would you like it all matted
with blood, también? George.

Well, they're all over each other. What
I lit? Red Shoes Diary.

Cover yourself.

Look, if you guys are going to live in
this house, there's going to be some

rules. First of all, you're both
grounded for lying to us about that

Jason's house last night. So we decided
for the next two weeks, there'll be no

going out, no TV, no phone.

Two weeks stuck in the house together?

I guess that sounds fair.

And while you're in the house, there'll
be no kissing, no touching.

And undergarments are to be worn at all
times.

Let me put this in a term you may
understand, schoolboy.

I see you're part of simple dangling.
You're a dead man.

Starting to win.

Dad, relax.

We're not going to do anything.

Yeah. It's so cool of you to take me in
for the rest of baseball season. I mean,

I would never take advantage of that.

That's right. You have nothing to worry
about. We're going to be adults about

this.

Now that we're all on the same page, I
need to get dressed, and you need to get

in the shower before work.

Jason, let's see the heat.

Bring the heat. Yeah, if you got any
heat, you probably got a big old noodle

an arm.

Man,

that was 90 miles an hour.

Hey, Ernie, throw it back to Jason as
hard as you can.

What was that?

22.

That thing's broken, man. Yeah, you're
right. You know, throw it again. I'll

a better measurement if I can run
alongside the ball.

The Dodger game is starting.

Oh, come on, Jason. The Dodgers are
playing the Astros. I want you to do

Clemens' pitch.

My boy, growing up in Cuba, I've seen a
lot of good ballplayers.

And you remind me of Lucho Brasodeoro
Rodriguez.

Best pitcher I ever saw.

Ah, he dreamed of coming to America and
playing for the Yankees.

Did he ever make it? No.

He tried to swim for freedom, but his
right arm was so much stronger than his

left, he ended up doing circles around
the island until they arrested him.

have no night.

My soul is a smiley -faced helium
balloon.

I think it's the best poem I've ever
written.

What do you think, Kenzie?

I think if I randomly ate those words
and puked them onto the

page, it'd be a much better poem.

the poetry club if you don't look
within.

I mean, you have to find your most
personal wound and rip the scab off.

Let your blood be your ink.

But I'm in love. I mean, my boyfriend's
in the house.

Things are pretty good right now. No,
they're not.

You're Mexican.

What are you talking about? She was born
in Burbank.

She's got her own car and a closet full
of clothes.

You want to see a Mexican suffering,
come back, we'll have to pay her cell

bill.

What are you doing?

Watching the Dodger game. So why don't
you guys go explore your dark souls in

the kitchen?

Look, you said we're not allowed to
watch TV.

Well, this is different than Jason's
baseball career.

Well, what if there was something about
poetry on TV and I wanted to watch it?

We watch something about poetry on TV
every year. It's called The Grinstow

Christmas.

What?

It rhymes.

Yeah, I like the dog with the antlers. I
know, it's classic.

Why don't you guys go write something
like that?

Come on, let's go finish this in the
kitchen.

You know what? I'm kind of hungry. Do I
have time to go make you some

sandwiches? No, no, I want you to fill
up Clem's pictures around this theater.

Hey, Carmen, while you're in there,
could you make us a couple of

please? What do you want on them?

You're just going to wait on them like
that?

You know they're only asking you because
you're a girl.

That is so sexist.

You know what's funny, Kenzie?

I asked Carmen to do something and,
like, sound comes out of your mouth.

You're like...

I can, like, hear it rattle.

Fancy's right. It is sexist.

Make your own sandwich. I've got a poem
to write. Oh, wait, wait, wait. I'll

write the poem for you. Let me help you.

Carmen, please, don't make me beg.

What I'd like is some chorizo and egg.

You know what, Mr. Lopez?

Our poems don't rhyme.

Because rhyme schemes are chains of...
Bondage on free thought.

Chains invented by men.

Huh.

You know, Kenzie, I'm betting you got a
forest under there, don't you?

Dad!

What's going on?

Oh, Carmen's making sandwiches. You want
one?

Take that!

Hey, don't you have to get to the
batting cages?

Yeah. I better get going. Hey.

allowed to. We're both grounded.

Dad, I'm missing my poetry slam.

I told you before, Carmen, this is
different, okay? This is about his

career. No, it's not different. It's
because I'm a girl.

Mom!

Call her again. That'll scare me.

Mom!

Stop and go, man. Go. Go, go, go, go.

Mom, Dad's letting Jason go to the
batting cages and he won't let me go to

poetry slam.

We agreed they were both grounded.

Look, Angie, Jason's got a chance to go
pro, okay?

He's got scouts that are going to come
and see him. His whole future depends on

how prepared he is. But poetry could be
my future.

Look, Carmen, poetry's not a career.

No one ever got a million dollar signing
bonus for rhyming bingo and namo.

So, baseball's more important than
poetry just because you can make money

Bingo, namo!

Well, poetry is my passion, and I'm
gonna major in it at college, so get

it.

At college.

Yeah, right.

What, I'm going to college.

Really? So I guess all those Ds on your
report card stood for c -c -c -college.

And that D stood for damn.

I was almost a C.

Dad, I was going through stuff, but I'm
trying harder now.

George, she did take her college
aptitude test.

The only reason she took it, Angie,
because you made her.

The karma's not motivated.

All she cares about is Jason, her hair,
and her clothes.

Even when you homeschooled her, she was
late to class because she said there was

traffic on the stairs.

Wait a second.

This isn't about poetry or me being a
girl.

This is about what Dad thinks of me.

Carmen, your father loves you, and he
wants what's best for you.

Dad, do you believe I could make it in
college?

What do you think I'm supposed to do
with my life?

Carmen, I just think you need to be
realistic.

Look, I never thought about you going to
college, Carmen, because you never

showed me any potential.

Carmen, he didn't mean it.

How could you?

Look, Angie, I know we're going to have
a big fight, all right, but let me tell

you this.

I didn't sleep very good last night, and
what I could use right now really is a

power nap.

Because if you defeat a tired George,
really, what have you won?

Tell our daughter she doesn't have any
potential.

Come on, Angie. Look, Carmen's never
been a great student, all right? She's

never come to me and said, Dad, I want
to be a teacher or an accountant or a

doctor. I mean, she's never pursued
anything that wasn't six foot four and

jeans that made his butt look so hot.

Well, she's pursuing poetry now, and if
that's got her excited about college,

then we should support her. Come on,
Angie. Carmen's not college material,

She needs to wake up and smell the
coffee.

Then, probably pour it for a trucker and
tell him about the specials.

What are

you doing?

Oh, see, I am taking my losing lotto
scratchers, painting over them with this

silver nail polish, and then I'm selling
them to the neighborhood kids.

I took a lose -lose, turned it into a
win -win.

Good, then you can go to hell hell.

Why don't you worry about your own
problems?

What's the princess mad about this time?

Forget to put the seat down and she
dunked her donut?

I'm not worried about Carmen going to
college.

Oh, college.

That's just a place to get drunk and
sleep with strangers.

So your bedroom's a university, huh?

What's the name of it? UCLA?

Hey, you know what?

All I'm saying, George, is rich people
are the only ones who can afford to go

college and screw around for four years.

People like us have to work.

Tell me about it. That's what I've been
trying to tell her, but she's 16. She

don't get it yet. Oh, well, neither did
you when you were her age.

You had this stupid dream of being a
rock star.

I had a shot.

You knew three chords.

And your voice sounded like a cat with
its webbles in a vice.

It only sounded like that on that one
song, Mexicat.

I think we both knew you were going to
end

up at the factory.

Well, I didn't know I was going to end
up in the factory. I could have got

jobs.

What about that time I was going to go
to that place, but I didn't go because I

didn't think the guy was going to be
there.

You walked out of Star Wars.

There were too many words at the
beginning.

Mommy, mommy, you fooled me. That was a
moving book.

You see, that's the kind of stuff you
did to me when I was a kid. You always

made fun of me. You never encouraged me.

George, what was I supposed to do? You
weren't a good student.

I mean, you never came to me and said...

I want to be a bookie or I want to run a
liquor store.

You know, something that showed me you
were serious about your future.

That's because you never pushed me.

So I never reached my potential.

That's right, George. Big word. Sound it
out.

I never pushed Carmen.

Oh, now see, you just can't win.

George, if you push kids and it doesn't
go well, then it's your fault. And if

they succeed... I don't know what that's
like.

Carmen doesn't have to be smart.

Maybe she's lucky.

Why don't you buy ten scratches and see?

Come on, right here.

I killed the Indians.

Force the Chinese to build my railroad.

Chugga, chugga.

All aboard for oppression.

Welcome to my white America.

Honey, you'll be fine. They all suck.

Mom!

What? They're just angry at everything.

Oh.

I'm sorry you feel discriminated against
by corporate society, but you can't be

a teller in a bank with a door knocker
in your nose.

What are you doing here? I came to talk
to Carmen.

It was wrong for me to say that you have
no potential, even though you haven't

worked hard at school or impressed me in
any way.

Is he trying to apologize?

It's too soon to tell. It could go
either way.

And part of that is my fault, because I
didn't push you enough, okay? I didn't

have expectations for you. But that's
over now.

You're going to make something of your
life, and I'm going to see to it. I'm

going to be like a drill sergeant.
You'll be like, oh, daddy, I can't stand

anymore. I'm so tired. I'm going to be
like, your daddy is...

It's an apology, honey.

And to show you that I'm serious, I even
started a college fund for you.

You mean all those jokes about me not
having a college fund were true?

No, you always had a college fund.

Just didn't always have money in it.

We spent money on other things, you
know, like the house and the cars and

insurance your mom made me buy because
that crazy duck on TV told her to.

I want you to know that I was so mad at
you after what you said that I finally

picked up my college test scores.

Well, being below average isn't good
enough anymore, Carmen, so we're going

get you a tutor, and we're going to get
those scores up, Maggie. No, actually,

Dad, I placed in the top 20 percentile.

Ivy League. That would be something. You
know, Carmen, there's only $300 in

there. That was the limit on my ATM.

Okay, up next, this poet is doing her
very first slam.

dad would say, you're right, let's get
the hell out of here. But now that I'm

all behind you, go up and do your thing,
girl. Okay, but, um, just so you know,

I wrote this when I was in a kind of
dark place. Stop making excuses. Go,

Consuela Lopez!

My daddy.

Daddy dream killer.

Daddy life dealer.

Daddy so...

That mama didn't make the cut on show
night, huh?