Original subtitles

I bet we've been together for a million years. And I bet we'll be

together for a million more.

Oh, it's like I started breathing on the night we kissed.

And I can't remember what I ever did before.

What would we do, baby, without her?

What would we do?

without us and there ain't no nothing we

can't love each other through what would we do baby without

us la la la mom

can I talk to you in a minute honey I gotta finish my resume

and then I'm off to the interview why don't you talk to your father

He can't help me. It's about boys.

Yeah, how would I know about them?

You know my philosophy, Mallory.

If a boy makes you start asking questions, cut him loose.

Hey, how's the resume coming, Ma?

Finished. It fudged a little bit, but basically it's me. Did you put in those

things I told you? Some. I left out the part about me designing the Eiffel

Tower.

Come on, Ma. They never check that stuff.

I did take some of your advice and I put all my attributes on page one right at

the top and the center. And then I hid the fact that I haven't worked in an

office for 12 years on page two under the staple.

I also changed 12 years to 144 months.

I don't know why I'm going on this interview anyway. They probably don't

me. They probably want someone more up -to -date, someone younger.

At least Grandma Moses didn't start painting until she was 80.

It still gives you a couple years.

Just trying to relax you.

Mom, all you've been talking about the past two weeks is how much you want this

job. Yeah, I thought you wanted to expand your horizons. I thought you

more challenging work.

I thought you wanted to make more money.

I do want all those things, but I'm scared.

You've got first aid jitters, Mom.

I get the same thing every fall when I go back to school.

I worry about my new teacher, my new classroom, new kids, everything.

But the first day always works out for me, and it will for you, too.

Thank you, Jennifer.

Of course, sometimes I throw up around lunchtime.

What are you worrying about? You're a terrific catch for any architectural

You know what you're doing, you're experienced, you're reliable.

Yeah, Mom, let's go over your assets and your liabilities.

Can't we just go over my assets?

May I?

Okay, Elise Keaton.

Now, that's a nice name. That should count as an asset.

Oh, it's a fine name, Mom, but let's face it. It's not going to get you the

Your references seem to be in order.

Alex, enough.

We don't have to add up your assets and liabilities.

When they meet you and read this resume, they're going to be very impressed.

Thank you.

You've all been very supportive.

Well, I don't want to be late. Any last -minute advice?

Ask about vacation.

Find out if there's a gumball machine.

Be yourself.

Don't tell him you're a woman.

I'm waiting here for Karen Banks.

You're looking at her.

Just kidding.

Actually, I'm Karen Dugan.

Kidding again.

Bill Channing.

Really? Would I kid you?

Elise Keith.

Oh, you're here for the new job, huh? Uh -huh.

I'm an architect myself.

You are?

You are.

Elise, I'm Karen Banks.

Hi. No kidding. She is.

I'm sorry we have to meet here in Bill's office. The conference room is tied up.

Bill, I would like to conduct an interview in here.

Okay, I got a couple extra minutes. What would you like to know?

I would like to know when you're leaving.

Out of here.

He is actually a very fine architect.

I could tell.

May I see your resume, please? Oh, yes.

There's nothing to hide.

Well, I see you haven't worked in an office for 12 years.

Has it been that long? It didn't seem more than 144 months.

Anything else that needs clarification?

Everything seems to be in order.

Because no one really checks up on those resumes anyway, huh?

We do.

Tell me why you would like to take a full -time job again.

Well, I am an architect, and...

Now that my kids can take care of themselves, I thought

I'd go back to work for what I'm trained to do in a more meaningful way. I see.

But more than anything, I'm tired of working out of my kitchen.

Do you know how hard it is working when you know that you're inches away from

fudge brownies?

Here. There's one question I've been asking all the applicants.

What do you feel should be the role of the architect in the 1980s?

What did they say?

I think we should take advantage of the new technology, but to build and not

destroy.

Take, for example, the old Morgan house. It's beautiful.

years old and they tore it down and put up a parking lot. Now that's the kind of

thing that makes me crazy.

That was one of our jobs.

Are you sure this dress is going to be ready for Chrissy's party?

Positive. It's a very simple pattern. You'll see, Jennifer, I'm going to pick

this sewing stuff really quickly.

Uh, remember, Mallory, the thread goes through the needle.

You'll be surprised, Alex. I know how important it is for a woman to learn how

to sew.

Mallory, you're a real woman. Woman of the 80s.

Thanks.

So, how did the interview go?

Hi.

Not very well. She didn't like me. She was very, very cold.

Now, it's not that I expected a big banner saying, Welcome back to

Elise Keaton.

But I thought, well, at least, you know, a cake.

I'm sure you made a good first impression, Elise. You always do. From

I laid eyes on you, I knew you were the only architect for me.

Maybe I'm better off if I don't get the job. I mean, what do I need a job for?

Is it commuting? Having a boss?

I mean, I'm doing okay working here at home.

I know exactly what you mean, Mom. I mean, I can take geometry next semester.

There's a chance I can handle it, but then there's a chance I couldn't handle

it. So why bother, right?

I don't think it's the same thing.

Lise, it's okay to admit you're scared about a new job.

I'm not scared.

Don't answer that.

Maybe I'm a little scared.

Hello?

Yes, she is. One moment, please.

Mom?

Hi, Bill. Oh, hi, Remy.

Hey, congratulations on getting the job.

Thanks. Whoa, that's my table.

Where's mine?

Right here.

Just breaking it in for you.

Well, nice to see you.

How's everything?

Actually, I'm having kind of a rough week.

I can't get my girlfriend to give me her new phone number.

Look it up in the book. You know her last name?

Enough about me.

You know, I think you're really going to like it here.

Why don't you let me introduce you to the machines?

Yo, machines, come on over here.

All right, have it your own way.

We've got the Runnymede 1800K word processor, the Marywell CAD system.

Boy, these machines are unbelievable.

I see you're making yourself at home. We're just talking about the machines.

Ah. I assume you're familiar with the Meriwell computer -aided design and

drafting system.

Well, I've never actually used the Meriwell, but how different can it be

any other appliance?

Well,

it could be helpful with the Manhattan Corporation project. We're bidding on a

combination office building and health club. Now, Bill is designing the office

building part of the project. You'll be working on the health club. Oh, sounds

exciting. We have... tentatively scheduled a presentation with Mr.

head of Manhattan for two weeks from tomorrow.

Two weeks?

Isn't that enough time?

It's more than enough.

Okay, good. Here you go.

Site plan, budget, specification.

Good luck. Thank you. Thanks for everything.

So, let's get to know each other. Tell me a little bit about yourself.

Family? Kid? I don't have any myself.

So I was married once.

Twice, if you count my cousin.

So, what kind of stuff have you been working on lately?

Oh, well, the last... You know, for my senior project, I worked on an entire

city of the future.

Large enough for a half a million people, it was quite a challenge.

Maximizing geometric aesthetics while maintaining a restrained functionalism.

What did you say you did last?

I just finished a remodel on the Wilson's ranch house.

We totally redid the kitchen, which involved putting up a new beam to

the roof.

Wow.

A beam.

So, I guess you're pretty anxious to get your hands on those little babies, huh?

No, I can wait my turn.

Bill, I need to go over these design plans with you. There is nothing here

I wanted. It's the opposite of what we discussed.

She wants me.

Can't be much different than a typewriter

Why don't you take a break?

The presentation is tomorrow. I'll take a break the day after.

What

do

you think?

It's very flattering.

Have you alerted Women's Wear Daily?

pretty good job, don't you?

She'll grow into it.

I won't grow into it by Saturday.

Mom, I need to wear it for Chrissy's party.

Honey, I'm sorry. I can't help you tonight.

That's what you said for the past five nights.

Okay, look, I'll tell you what. After you kids go to bed, I'll finish it. But

the whole idea was for me to learn how to do it. Well, honey, you can't have

everything. I am doing the best I can. Girls, girls, your mother's really busy.

I think we should let her work, huh?

Well, she's too busy for us.

Mom, I sympathize with what you're going through.

Today's woman is in a very difficult position.

Tradition and certainly biology have put her in the home.

Now there are these ridiculous new feminist pressures for her to do things

outside the home like developing a career.

Your anxiety is natural, Mom. You can't fool with Mother Nature.

Say goodnight, Alex.

Good night, Alex.

Elise, I've done a lot of presentations.

Sometimes a little joke can get you off on the right foot. Maybe something like

this.

A guy and his dog go into a bar.

Stephen, that's ridiculous.

I'm just trying to help.

Aren't you supposed to come up with just one design, just one health club?

Thank you, Stephen. I think I know what I'm doing.

Look, once I've laid out all the options, I'm going to synthesize them

single, coherent proposal.

Elise. I can handle it. I can handle it.

Look, Elise, it's after 10 o 'clock. You promised to sew Jennifer's dress.

You're going to be up all night. You're obviously overworked. Now, why don't you

talk to Karen about that? I can't. I can't let her know I'm having problems

already. But you are.

You're pretending you know how to use the computer.

You're working at a pace that's much faster than what you're used to. You're

used to their system there, and you're afraid to ask questions. Why don't you

say I'm failing on the job?

All I'm saying is that maybe you should ask for a little help at work. Yeah,

well, I could use a little help around here, too.

Well, I'll be glad to help.

That is exactly what I don't want.

What are you talking about?

know what I'm talking about. For the past two weeks, you've been doing more

cooking than usual. You've been spending more time with the kids. You have been

sweeter, kinder, more understanding than you have ever been in your life, and I

am sick of it!

I am trying to be supportive. I'm

trying to help.

Well, Stephen, all sorts of women have families and full -time jobs without

help.

That's because I'm not married.

of pressure right now. Evidently, you've got to let off a little steam.

So go ahead.

Nothing you can say will make me mad.

You call yourself supportive?

So, in conclusion, Mr. Halifax, my goal here was to design an office that was

more impressive than the offices of the heads of General Motors, IBM, AT &T.

For, in my opinion, you are a more impressive executive than any of those

I understand.

Well, that's the office in a nutshell.

It was a pleasure to design, and if I may be so bold as to say, you were an

inspiration.

Thank you, Bill. That was very good.

What do you think, Mr. Halifax?

It's not what I had in mind at all. I didn't think so. And that's why I've

more than willing to work on this until I get it exactly right.

It's not what I had in mind, but I thought it was brilliant.

Well, you have a keen eye.

I'm sure you never studied architecture yourself.

Positive. Never been to college.

I'm a self -made man.

I didn't want to go to college either. My parents made me.

Well, Mr. Halifax, I'm glad you're so pleased with the office building. Now,

Elise will show us what the health club's going to be like.

Warmed them up for you, Elise. Go get them.

I'm real excited about this project, Mr.

Halifax, as I'm sure you are, too.

Before I start the presentation, I'm reminded of a little story.

This man and his dog go into a bar.

Oh, don't stop her. This sounds good. What kind of a dog was it?

Bill. Elise, please continue.

And the bartender says, hey, what... Elise!

The presentation.

Okay, um, here is the one -story plan.

Here is the multi -story plan.

And we have the special one, the underground gymnasium plan.

Now, within each plan, there are several subplans, and we can go over the

aspects of each, and you can decide which you like best.

You're being cute, right?

You really just have one proposal.

I mean, you did design a health club, didn't you?

Well, I really didn't get a chance to narrow it down to just one.

Believe me, I wanted to, but I ran out of time last night. Had to make all

lunches before I went to bed, and I lost the sleeve on Jennifer's dress.

Let's start with the under... Underground gymnasium plan. Now, that

you the best of all possible worlds. And who deserves that more than you, huh,

Mr. H?

Karen, I'm a busy man. I don't have time to look through all these things.

Now, I'm paying this architectural firm to design my building.

If I wanted to design it myself, I would have done so.

Then I bet you'd have done a heck of a job, Mr. H.

I have an idea.

Why don't you put some of these plans on the computer, and we can see which you

like best.

Right.

Why don't I just draw it up on pencil and paper? The computer's so impersonal.

That's why I like it. Let's go.

Well, forget it. I can't use the computer.

Why not?

I simply don't know how to use the machine.

I've been faking it.

Karen, what's going on here?

Is this some kind of affirmative action thing?

Did you have to hire that person?

Now, see here, Mr. Halifax. What is it?

See you. I didn't hear you that well.

See?

Mr. Halifax, I apologize for wasting your time.

Karen, I'm sorry. I'm tired of pretending.

Pretending that I know everything about architecture today.

Pretending that having a job and three kids is a piece of cake.

The truth of the matter is, it's hard to design a building under this kind of

pressure.

It's hard using machines you've never even heard of before, and it is damn

coming back to work after all these years.

Well, that seemed to go pretty well.

Stephen, I made such a fool out of myself. Whatever made me think I could

a job like that? At least just because this one presentation didn't work out

doesn't mean you're not qualified for the job.

How did the joke go over?

Did you go...

Like I told you?

Just... Uh, yeah.

Oh, uh, Stephen, it's Karen and Bill from the office. Oh, of course. Come on

Hi, Stephen. Hi.

Heard a lot about you, big guy.

I think you'll beat that morals charge.

Release. Que pasa?

Oh. Left your purse at the office.

You got a lot of interesting things in there.

I'm sure the three of you have a lot to talk about. You're out of here.

Have a way with words, Bill.

Come, sit down.

Elise, why didn't you just tell me you were having problems? We all have

problems at work, and we all ask each other for help.

I guess I wanted you to think I could do the job.

Well, that's exactly what I do think.

Elise, you have years of experience.

You're practical, and yet you're one of the most creative people I've ever met.

Thank you.

I am really embarrassed.

I've been trying to do everything, and I can't do it.

I thought that was what you expected of me, and all the anger and frustration

built up, and it all came out. I'm sorry.

Actually, it was something to see.

You're quite beautiful when you're angry.

We sifted through your ideas at the office.

You came up with some good things.

What I think we should do is talk about them together.

You still want me to work on the project?

Yes, I do. We'll talk about it in the morning.

Oh, thank you for the second chance. I was ready to come over tomorrow and

out my desk. You can clean out mine. I'll give you the blowtorch.

We have to be going. We're meeting Mr.

Halifax for dinner.

I sure hope it goes better than the last time.

He wouldn't let me eat until he was finished.

Thank you. I'll see you tomorrow. I really appreciate it.

Bye.

One of your beams?

Jim!

Yeah, what is it?

Aren't you still a working woman? Oh, great!

I think I owe everyone an apology.

I think that's a very noble gesture.

What did you do?

Ever since I started working, I was taking all my irritability and

out on you.

I'm sorry. I was trying to be the perfect working woman, the perfect

perfect wife, and crazy, because I'm not perfect.

Mom, profession's overrated.

I know. I've been there.

It hasn't been all your fault, Elise. If you're going to work, we've got to make

some adjustments, too.

As a future working woman, I'm with you 100%.

That goes double for me.

Not the bit about working.

I think what we're trying to say, Mom, is we're willing to help out more.

Thank you.

So, Mom, what's for dinner?

What I mean is, what would you like us to make you for dinner?

Sit, Ubu, sit.

Good dog.