Original subtitles

Heartbeat, why do you miss when my baby kisses me?

Heartbeat, why does a love kiss stay in my memory?

Oh,

Alfred.

Clear off. Go on.

Alfred, get out of there. Go on. Go on. Get lost.

Ah!

Oscar! What is it?

Oh, it's never going to go through there. Oh, yes, it will. Just put your

into it.

Where did you get it from, anyway?

I told you.

A sale.

What do we need a freezer for?

Oh, don't be such a dick in the mud.

Think what we'll be able to put in it.

What? Ice lollies, of course.

On tap, whenever you want them. Oh.

See how I look after my favourite nephew?

Eh? Come on.

We'll be right back.

Not the frightening light. How would it die?

I phoned Helen, by the way. Well, she's the police surgeon, so I thought... OK.

If it hadn't been for Alfred, it would have gone off at the bin then. No -one

would have ever known.

It's just been chopped off exactly at the point we... Oh, Bernie, shut up!

Right.

First impressions only.

A left hand.

Probably male.

Hasn't done any manual work.

No ring on the wedding finger.

Severed quite neatly.

I'd guess after death.

And no decomposition, so... Must be recent.

Do you have a plastic bag, Rob?

We need to get it over to the path lab.

Do you want me to do that?

I can manage, thank you.

What I'm wondering is, did this person or persons put any other body parts in

any other bins?

In other words, where's the rest of the body? Exactly.

There might not be one.

It might just be the hand.

Somebody mislaid it, you mean?

Well, through a fit of carelessness, perhaps.

I don't really think so.

Ah, Walker.

How far did the bin men get?

Right through the village, Sarge. Just a few outlying farms to do.

You managed to stop them?

Yes, Sarge.

I told them to take whatever they've collected so far back to the depot.

Right.

Ventress, get me the path lab.

I'll see if they've found any fingerprints on that hand yet.

Well, go on, you two.

Get round to the depot and start sorting through the refuse.

Chop, chop.

Great.

And you, younger, you better check through the outlying bins.

You know, Rosie, if Gina hadn't come out at that exact moment, Alfred might have

run off and buried it.

I know.

Or he might have run over here and put it in his basket.

I mean, can you imagine finding a human hand in Alfred's basket?

What are you doing?

I'm trying to find a talk wrench.

Oh, I don't know, David.

It's all play.

It's a mess.

I spent half my life trying to find things.

Oh, don't say anything. It'll only...

What are you two up to?

Nothing. She's trying to find a talk wrench.

David! Well, it's where I left it, isn't it? It's on the floor.

No, Bernie, it isn't.

And I can't get on without it.

Oh, what?

I was just... Yes?

Well, no one here's had an accident, have they?

With a bit of machinery or something?

No.

Loft her hand and put it in.

But if anyone does come in... Yes.

Thanks, then.

No hand -related accidents at either Ashfordly General or the Royal.

And you've tried the GPs?

Oh, yes.

So, no accidents.

Nothing on the missing persons list.

And Younger hasn't come up with anything yet.

Ah. Any luck?

Look, Sarge.

walking through a stinking mass of potato peelings and rotten cabbages and

chicken carbs. All right, that's enough.

Any body parts?

No.

Right. Well, I think we've done as much as we can.

Get me D .I. Shiner.

Look, Bernie, it's no -one's fault.

Well, apart from you did have it last.

Leave it for now, eh? And I'll have a good old clear up in the morning. No.

I'll find it in a minute. You just go home.

Come on, then.

Night, Mrs Scripps.

Night, Bernie.

It's me.

And I just want to be near.

Be cast now.

Like a dove in the rain. Hello?

Oh, I'm really sorry.

Look, I know it's way past there, three hours, but I feel really shaky.

Come on in.

One sleeping tablet.

Don't make a habit of it.

I won't.

Thanks, Helen.

I mean, not every day you find it horrible.

What are you looking at?

Oh, nothing.

What?

I think there's someone out there.

Where?

Just down the road.

You better call Rob.

No.

Helen.

There's a bloke sat outside in a car, staring at us.

Do it now.

It's probably nothing.

Not now.

It's me.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

What a shot. Good old Peg.

What are you doing?

Shooting bunnies. Got six this afternoon and another one now.

Good, innit?

Robin? Yeah, and 20 pheasants.

We'll never eat all those.

Not for us, you silly boy.

To sell on our stall.

What stall?

David, I have told you that many times. I haven't.

Why do you think I bought the freezer?

Well, for my ice dollies and that. Don't be daft.

No, it's to store game in, you great dollop.

We get as many rabbits and pheasants as we can find, free, mind, and then each

week we take them into Ashfordly and bingo, 100 % profit.

We?

Well, you don't think I'd leave you out, do you, love, eh?

I mean, this is a joint venture.

You'll be doing the plucking and the gutting.

It's nice to be out in the morning when you've got somewhere to go.

It seems there ain't no places that can make you feel so low.

Hardwick Green where the grass is gray, Fezzik's Hume and Harper Hay.

Wally Range where the tomcats roll.

They're not the types of roads, but it's home.

David.

Have you moved anything?

No.

Why, I'm looking for something.

No, no, nothing. No.

Do you have to do that?

All right.

D .I. Shine has just pulled up.

Definitely no reports of any more body parts.

No, Sarge.

Not a sausage.

Good. With any luck, there won't be.

It could be in all different places, Sergeant.

Sort of scattered about to avoid detection.

The legs in Scotland, perhaps, and the arms in... All right, young man. Just

on, eh?

Sorry, I'm late. You might have to pick up this.

Several good sets of prints on the sellotape, all from the same person.

And a bit of a breakthrough, as a matter of fact. A surprise you didn't notice.

This.

Tucked inside the box.

If we can find out who wrote this, we could discover who put the hand in that.

P -B -C -B -C -A -H -C -R -8 -6 -8. Some sort of code, obviously.

A very distinctive handwriting.

Look at the H and the Cs.

I know that writing.

It's Bernie's scripts.

Yeah.

But think about it, Gina.

It'd take a hell of a lot of elbow grease to cut hand off.

I mean, you've got to go through the bones and the sinews.

Please. Shut up, Peggy. You're making Bernie feel sick.

I ain't half as sick as I felt when I found it.

Hey, you know what? I reckon that if I'd found it, I'd have thought it was one

of those ladies out of a shop window.

You know, one of those dummy things.

Well, apart from the blood, obviously, but... I think I'm going balmy.

Oh, aye.

Things keep going missing from the workshop.

Leave them where I remember them.

Next day, they're gone.

Today was the worst yet. I can't find my pressure gauge, my small spanner set.

Hang on, hang on.

Have you asked Rosie and David?

I can't. If I tell David, he'll tell her, and she'll think I'm going gaga.

Don't be daft. It's true, Oscar. She already thinks I'm busted.

I'm beginning to think she's right.

Oh, come on, Bernie. You've got years left.

You're still a spring chicken.

Yesterday, we lost a wrench.

I knew exactly where I'd left it.

No.

I'm losing my memory.

Either you are or somebody's nicking things.

Nicking things?

Well, somebody must be helping themselves to your tools. And if that's

you must tell the police.

Hang on.

Mr. Scripps.

Yes? Would you step outside a minute, please?

What's he done?

I don't know.

It'll be about that hand, I bet.

Well, think about it. He does run the mortuary.

He might have cut the hand off by accident in the embalming process.

Could you confirm that this is your handwriting, please?

Yes. Excellent.

It was found in this box, which presumably you must also recognise.

No.

Well, that's strange.

This box, Mr Scripps, with your writing in it, was used by someone to throw away

a hand.

A hand that was found just across from your garage in a bin.

Mr Scripps, did you put this box with a hand in it in that bin?

No.

No, I didn't.

I'm not at all happy about all this. In fact, I'm not putting up with it.

Get him back.

Look, Bernie.

All we want you to do is remember what that bit of paper's all about.

A piece that leads us somewhere.

What piece of paper?

Some old invoice of mine.

Found with the hand.

Blimey. The trouble is, I can't remember writing it.

Well, that's all right.

I'll help you.

It's just a case of jogging your memory.

There's nothing wrong with my memory.

Of course there isn't. Hey, Mr. Scrooge, do you ever guess what everybody's

saying? Shut up, Dave. They reckon that you've got that ham from a mortuary and

put it in a bin and forgotten it.

That's it. I'm shutting up the shop. Oh, come on. It were only pebbly.

Baby!

There you are, Mrs. Armstrong.

Oh, lovely.

So, er, when do I get me cut?

Lenny, trust me.

Once we're up and running, we'll both be in the money.

Meanwhile, you keep them coming. The more, the merrier.

It's not a code, Mr Shine. It's the way I work the invoices out before I write

them properly.

OK. What does TBCBC mean?

To be collected by customer.

And CR?

Car part!

Oh, that's CP, you dog.

I know what AH is.

Ashfordly Hall.

Right. So if we look under the Ashfordly Hall, I count.

CR. Nothing on that page.

Car radio!

Car radio? What do you think?

Aye, yes, I recall getting a radio for Lord Ashfordly once, ages ago, yes.

But I didn't fit it. No, one of his... chaps must have done.

In which case, he might have collected it from you, still in its box, and you

could have left the rough invoice in there by mistake.

Aye, I suppose so, yeah. So it could have ended up at the hall.

Here we are, car radio.

Eight pounds, six and eight.

Ten more ages ago, too. Five years, in fact.

Thank you, Mr Scripps.

You've been most helpful.

Oh, Sergeant Miller's here.

Oh, good.

Walker.

Thank you. Here I am, Mr. Peters. The hall's straight away.

Is there anything the matter, Bernie?

I think rather, uh... No, no, nothing.

Hello?

Sorry, were you... No.

It's just, I wanted a quick word, but if you're busy... No, no, I was just going

home for a sandwich.

Would you like to join me?

No, really.

It's just, I'm not sure, but I think someone's watching my house.

Right. For the last couple of days, there's been a dark car parked outside.

Sounds a bit silly now I say it.

Oh, I don't want to make a big thing of it.

I know you're up to your ears in this hand business.

I'll take the details all the same.

I could always get Jeff or Phil onto it anyway, if necessary.

Thanks.

You're everywhere and nowhere, baby That's where you're at

Going down the bumpy hillside In your hippie

hat Flying across the country

Walker had better be right about this. I don't think his lordship will be best

pleased.

We're all equal in the eyes of the law.

Uh -huh.

Of course.

This? You seriously expect me to remember this? I can't even remember the

When am I supposed to have bought it?

Five years ago. Five years? This is ridiculous.

Constable Walker's here, my lord. Wants to speak to the officers.

While you're here, Mrs Kellett, do you remember us getting a new car radio a

years ago?

Yes, my lord. Oh, and what happened to the box that it came in? The box? Yes,

Mrs Kellett, the box.

Unbelievable, I know, but these gentlemen want to know what happened to

must have been thrown away, I suppose.

Sorry, Sarge, it's pretty urgent.

Jeff's found another body part.

There you are, Jeff.

I'll put it here.

Thanks, Al.

So, um, what part of the body was it?

I didn't look.

Right, lad.

Younger's find has given us a lot more information.

One, the fingerprints on the wrapping paper were the same as those found on

box, which means that the same person parceled up both bits.

And two, the path lab think that the hand and your bit...

Or almost certainly from the same body. What bit was it, by the way?

Part of the torso.

And three, that it was frozen.

Frozen? But sure, it hasn't been cold enough.

Unfrozen on the outside, but frozen in the middle.

Hey, you don't suppose that... Yes, Bellamy, I do.

The body parts were stored in a freezer.

Right, Bernie, what's the big mystery then?

Yes. It's open.

Yes.

It's never open. I keep it very firmly shut.

Well, if that window is open when it's always shut and things are going

I would say you've definitely got an intruder.

I'm not going to the police.

Well, you're going to have to.

No, I can't.

I mean, everyone would know and...

It might all be my fault, this. I could have opened this for some reason and

forgotten.

No, I want this kept between you and me.

All right.

OK, I've got another idea.

Sorry, Mrs Kellett, I need to see Lord Ashfordly again.

What is it now, Walker?

I know this might sound like a silly question, but does the estate own a

freezer?

We did have, but we just got rid of it.

When? A few days ago, wasn't it? That's right, sir. Lord Ashford thought it was

time we had something bigger, but it hasn't arrived yet. And what happened to

the old one?

Really, what is this all about?

I've never known such a fuss, Walker.

Anyway, this is where we put all the rubbish.

If it's going to be anywhere, it'll be through here.

Now, what on earth do you want to say of what I cannot imagine?

It's to do with the body parts business.

Well, so you keep saying it. It doesn't make any sense to me, I can tell you.

Well, there's nothing here.

Lenny, just a moment.

Yes, sir?

We're looking for our old freezer. The staff say they put it on the dump a few

days ago. Did you see it?

I might have done, sir. Well, where is it now?

I don't know.

Well, come on, man. Do you see anyone take it?

No?

Edward!

Oh!

Come over!

All of us goodies, have you found much to eat?

You're eating an ice lolly.

Why is that?

Oh, I can't tell you that, Mr Walker, because Peggy says it's a secret.

Oh, not these.

The freezer.

Do you want to see my freezer?

Yes, please.

It's not dodgy, if that's what you're thinking.

I bought it in a sale, all legit and above board. I don't think so. I think

came from the Ashfordly estate.

It most certainly did not.

Oh, have you been talking to Lenny Carter?

All right.

He got it for me from the estate, yes. But only off the dump. I can't see aught

wrong in that.

Yeah, well, neither can I in principle, Peggy. It's just that it's needed as

part of a criminal inquiry.

You... I'm afraid so.

Sergeant Miller wants me to take it back for forensic examination.

Now? Is there much in it?

No.

I see.

Give him off me!

Sit, Trojan, sit.

He's only doing his job.

He's an ex -pleaser.

Aren't you be gorgeous?

Am I, really?

Letter from Mr Pickersley.

Hello. Friend of Oscar's.

Security David. He's our new guard dog.

Now, if Lenny Carter found that freezer... What?

Well, I wonder if he knows anything.

Like... I don't know.

Anything. Well, why don't you ask him, then?

I thought he'd get a straight answer.

Good morning, all.

Any more complaints about that dog?

Two. One, it barked all night, and two, it attacked a postman.

Get over there and sort it out, will you?

Me, Sergeant?

Yes, you.

I'm not very good with dogs.

Ashford Lake Police Station.

Oh, hello, Helen.

Right, I'll get straight on with it.

The snooper's back.

I'll go.

Come on, Jeff.

Come on.

I'll give you a lift.

Take the brolly, lad.

That'll keep it up.

Well,

I'm not going.

Daisy.

Lie down!

He can't keep doing the punch. He's got work to do. Well, pull that dog away.

What? There'd be no point in having him then, would there?

I don't know what the point is anyway, Mo. It doesn't scare people to death.

Exactly.

Where is it?

What? The dog.

Let's have a look at him then.

Oh, be careful, Mr Young.

Bearing in mind that the feeder came from Ashfordly Hall, which is where we

think the box containing the hand came from, and bearing in mind... Yes,

all very interesting, but events have moved on.

We found a bullet.

A bullet?

Yes, a .455 calibre bullet embedded deep in our torso.

Only discovered as the flesh unfroze.

So it is murder?

Yes. And if it's a .455 bullet, I'm told it could only have been fired from a

Webley pistol.

Well, thanks for that.

What? I was approaching a suspect.

Before you come crashing in.

I've been chased by a great big dog.

Jeff, it's chained up.

What are you doing?

You may well ask.

Thanks to your little friend PC Walker, we've lost our freezer.

Why? Oh, I don't know. Miller wanted it for something.

Well, this lot's going to melt.

Exactly, so we've got to cook them.

Well, you can't cook.

No, David, but I know someone who can.

Here, you get on with the plucking and the skinning while I get on telephone.

Oh, Helen, she's really nervous, you know.

And thanks to Geoff, it's going to be even harder to catch this snooper now,

isn't it?

Amesfield Arms.

Oi, Peg, what can I do for you?

What?

Oh, no.

No, no, no.

You know, I must say I'm surprised that Miller is not taking this more

seriously. All he can think about is freezers and Webley pistols.

You know, I think it's about time you and I did a bit of snooping on our own,

don't you?

I'm warning you, Shiner, any more of this and I shall be forced to call my

solicitor. All the same, sir, according to our records, you do own a Webley

pistol.

Oh, come on in, then.

Well, what do you think of another half an hour?

I might as well.

My dad will come back.

If he was there in the first place.

Can we have a word, sir?

Yes.

Do you mind telling us what you're doing here? I don't think that's any of your

business, is it?

It is, when you've been parked here off and on for several days, and as an ex

-police officer and a member of the parish council, I've been asked to

investigate.

Oh,

Alf, I forgot my glasses.

Mr. C. Williams, private investigator.

Here we are.

A wartime memento of my days in the Greenhowards. Thank you, sir.

One of you going to explain to me what this is all about?

I'm afraid it was a gun of this type that was used to kill our victim.

What victim?

The owner of the hand and the torso, sir.

It wasn't this particular gun, I can assure you. I'm the only person who

about it.

Unless, of course, you think it was me.

Unless you think I'm in there going around shooting people and chopping them

and putting them in dustbins.

Nothing would surprise me in this job, Lord Ashfordly.

So you were a sergeant with the Manchester lot?

Yes, indeed.

And you were a sergeant over here at just the same time.

And Alf?

Oh, I never rose to those dizzy heights. They're always a constable.

Still doing a grand job, though.

Ah, yes, in civvies.

I was going to do just that when I retired, and then this private eye job

up. How did you find it?

Pretty dull, really.

Mainly matrimonial.

Just like this one.

And you were sent up here by Matthew Trent.

That's right.

Usual thing, pre -divorce.

Surveillance on the wife.

See if she's up to anything naughty.

So we can counterclaim.

Ah, Helen.

This is the man I phoned you about, Mr Williams.

How dare you spy on me?

I'm sorry. I don't want a conversation, Mr... Whoever you are.

Why don't you just go back to where you came from and tell my ex -husband that

he's wasting his money?

I'm not up to anything.

And considering his record in that field, he's got a flaming cheat to even

suggest it.

Don't you dare show your face outside my house again.

Ever.

Helen, it's not his fault. He's just doing his... I'm sorry about that.

Par for the course.

Lenny, I just want a quick word about that freezer.

It was dumped.

Rubbish. I know.

Mrs Armstrong wanted one and I found it for her.

And you've come round here to accuse me of poaching. I'm not having it.

It's her problem and it's nothing to do with me.

And if Mrs Kellett says anything different, she's a lying cow.

Lenny, I'm not interested in whether or not you've been poaching.

I'm interested in what was inside that freezer when you... What did you say

about Mrs Kellett? Nothing.

No, no. Come on.

I can't believe this.

She said she wouldn't stay.

I mean, she didn't want me to see her any more than I wanted her to see me.

I think I'd better come in, hadn't I?

Lenny was adamant.

He was out doing a spot of poaching in the early hours of the morning when he

met Mrs Kellett.

Just near where I found the torso the very next day, sir. No.

That's what he said, sir.

And according to him, she was carrying a package.

I've known her for years.

She's not the sort of lady to wander around the countryside at night popping

body parts into bins.

Ashford Road Police Station. Don't smile, Bellamy. It's not funny. Yes, he

Yes, sir. Hold on.

It's forensics for you, Inspector.

Hello, Shiner.

So, not keen on the Mrs. Cullet idea, eh?

Doesn't look like it, Sergeant. I see.

Make inquiries about her on the table.

Thank you.

Fingerprints.

They found several sets on the Webley, and one of them matches the prints on

parcels. So whoever wrapped up the body parts must have handled the gun.

Come on, come on.

Down, George, down!

What do you mean you do? Don't raise your... No! No, fat dog, no!

I'm so sorry, Lord.

I'll fetch the dog. Is that your dog?

In a way. Well, do something about it, or I'll have you in court under the 1871

dog sack!

I'm really

sorry, Burleigh. No, no, but I had

rather hope for an apology from Inspector Shiner in person.

Ah, he couldn't. He's been bitten by a dog.

Oh, has he now?

Well, that's everyone, apart from Mrs Kellett.

Oh, for goodness sake, don't go upsetting her. You know what

like. Easily upset.

Well, I've only upset her once, but never again, I can tell you. It took me

months to win her round.

What was it about?

Oh, goodness me, it was years ago.

Her brother came to stay, that's right. Set himself up in the servants' quarters

and showed no sign of leaving, so I had to put my foot down.

I bet she didn't like that.

No, she did not.

I mean, she got rid of him, all right, but was in the most frightful mood for

ages afterwards.

Ah, Mr Kelly, we were just talking about you. What about your brother? What did

you say his name was? Peter.

Poor dear Peter.

I've lost touch completely, I'm afraid.

Just as well, from what I remember.

Anyway, Mrs Kellett, as I'm sure Peter Younger has told you, we need your

fingerprints. Absurd, I know, but there it is.

That's quite all right.

Mrs Kellett, will it be a minute? How long ago was it? About five years, I

think. Why?

Yep, I've got that, Rob.

Last seen five years ago.

Right. Well, I'll find out what I can.

Out.

Police? Ashfordly here. Something rather odd.

I was just... Tidying up?

I thought... What have you thought wrong?

I'm sorry.

I was only trying to help.

Well, in future, don't.

At least it clears one thing about not losing my marbles.

I never thought you were.

That's not what this has been about, is it? Yes.

Oh, I am so sorry, Bernie.

Well, there's no intruder. We shan't be needing the dog, which is just as well,

because Oscar's taking it back to Mr Pickersley this evening.

Aw. Aw, about it, Rosemary. It was a disaster.

Come on.

Let's get things back to how I like it, eh?

and your orphanage is done

drying like a fire in the

sun

A minute or so.

Blankets, please.

In my bag, quick as you can.

Here you go, Doctor.

Look at yourself.

If you want the evidence, look in the sitting room on the carpet.

I think you'll find the bloodstains are still there.

Let's get you warm and dry first.

I had to do it.

You don't know what it was like.

The eye shall not take a statement of you just as soon as we get you warm.

going to tell her?

Ashfordly, everything.

I was desperate.

I never meant to do it, John.

Honest, I didn't.

Take her away.

My car.

Doctor's orders.

I beg your pardon? I supplied this lot. Fair's fair.

Come on, Gina. If you don't like it, charge it to the boys in blue.

They was the ones that nicked my fridge, after all.

Hey, you could have hoped, hadn't you?

Oh, look at him.

I don't know what's good for him.

Have another leg, Bernie. Go on.

Oh.

Oh, I don't know how you can do that, Mr Scripps.

The freezer that we've kept this lot in had a dead body in for a whole five

years. Nonsense.

Oh, no, it's true.

It's all over the village.

Mrs Kellett kept her brother in our freezer.

He was blackmailing her, apparently.

Either she gave him her life savings or he'd make sure that she lost her job up

at the hall.

So why put him in the freezer?

I don't know.

Panic, terror, who knows?

So where's the rest of him?

I don't know, Geoff.

I think the question is, I mean, we only found out tonight.

Look, you know as much as I do, all right.

Where's Rob got to? Somebody please tell Geoff to shut up, will you?

Shut up, Geoff!

Am I forgiven, then?

Well, there's no more digs about me and my memory.

There won't be.

I told you that a minute ago.

I should tell him again, love. He'll have forgotten by now.

Come on, you'll catch a death.

No need to be modded.

After all, everything's all before.

Don't be that very sensible, Dr. Trent.

I'm sick of being sensible.

Are you now?

Well, maybe I'm not.

Especially when you've been so unfriendly.

It's only because I was scared.

Scared?

Of what?

You.

Me.

I'm not paying you any more compliments till you get these wet clothes off.

You're close.