Original subtitles

DRAMATIC MUSIC

Just moments ago, the court ruled in favour

of the Mayor of Bakerbury in his libel case

against the Bakerbury Gazette.

Journalist Anton Grant accused the mayor of exploiting

ex-prisoners in his many hospitality businesses,

a claim the Mayor vociferously denied.

A denial of wrongdoing. Ha! Wonders never cease.

Here comes the editor of the Bakerbury Gazette.

Mr Trotter, what's your response to losing the case?

'No comment.'

'And are you going to appeal, Mr Trotter?'

Editors get sued all the time.

He'll probably just take it on the chin.

Still, at least he didn't fire you.

May as well have. He stuck me on Entertainment.

'Mayor Firth, do you have a statement about the verdict?'

I'm delighted the court made the right decision today.

After all my charitable work, it's a disgrace to have

my reputation dragged through the muck

by some grubby little fake news hack.

Well, OK, we can probably switch it off now.

HE SIGHS

And speaking of charitable events,

the 2010 sensation Psychic Buffalo are in Bakerbury

for a one night only concert.

My favourite of their tracks has got to be the inimitable

Come To Me, Baby, I'm Waiting For You.

How about you, Miss Badwan?

What the hell? Can you believe that?

Fake news hack. No, no.

Outrageous. Anyway, I'd better go.

I'm interviewing Dennis Pride. I hear he's a nice guy.

Hey, you said you were into indie rock.

I've got a press pass. I could get you in.

Erm, no. I-I would love to, but I, erm,

I have a puzzle deadline.

Fair enough. Shame, though. Mm-hm.

SINGING: I'll miss you, baby, tonight!

HE CHUCKLES

Why didn't you tell him?

Because, if he knew this Dennis was my Dennis,

he'd do something stupid.

And Anton needs to keep his job. CORA SIGHS

CORA SIGHS A concert in Bakerbury!

What the hell is that swine playing at?

He's just trying to get in my head.

But don't worry, I can handle him.

Just promise me you won't do something stupid.

I promise.

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

PUB CHATTER

MAYOR FIRTH: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

FIRTH CHUCKLES CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

What a fantastic turnout tonight.

Everybody, please take your seats.

The show's about to start.

Now, for those of you who don't know me,

I'm Mayor Firth of Firth Enterprises,

proud sponsor of tonight's performance by Psychic Buffalo!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Whoo!

Er, oooh!

Not just Firth Enterprises, I think you'll find, my darling.

Yes, thank you, Mrs Hendrix. Come on, come up here.

I was just getting to that.

Also contributing a slightly smaller but still generous donation,

Ray and Julien Hendrix of Hendrix & Son.

Whoo! A round of applause, everyone.

APPLAUSE

And not forgetting Executive Assistant Olivia Lemon.

Oh, I think the lads are ready.

Enjoy the show! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Oh, there he is.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Good to be here, Bakerbury.

This one's an early one. See if you recognise it.

ROCK MUSIC

SCREAMING, CHEERING

# Hey, Mr Spaceman

# I've been callin' you from Earth

# Don't know what you're thinking

# There's no promising... #

I don't want Ray finding out about this.

This is your chance to put it right. Now just fix it, Olivia.

Fine. Good. Thank you.

BACKGROUND ROCK MUSIC

Oh, it's Cora Felton, isn't it?

It is indeed. Yes!

Someone told me you lived in town.

Oh. I'm Gloria.

Oh, what did you think of the concert? Brilliant, wasn't it?

Oh... Oh, yes. Loved it. Huge fan.

Yeah. Oh, yes, us too.

We danced to Missing You at our wedding last year.

And when I heard they were coming to town, I said to Ray, I said,

"We've just got to sponsor them."

I mean, it's not every day you get to meet Dennis Pride.

Mm! They're going clubbing

at the Duke Vincent after this.

Join us, if you fancy it.

Oh, thank you. But I think my clubbing days are behind me.

Oh, that's what Ray said.

But I say, "You're never too old to shake a tail feather."

LAUGHTER

You know where we are if you change your mind.

SIGHS

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

OK, Dennis, I'm going to say this only once.

You can die tonight, or...

No, no.

CLEARS THROAT

I'm going to say this only once.

You can leave town in one piece,

or you can leave in a body bag.

What's it gonna be?

Hah.

Hey, can I have a word?

Look, it's a nice hotel enough, but I'm having a few problems.

Is there any way you can stop...

If I may offer a suggestion, lose the shades.

Less conspicuous.

Oh, it is you.

It's a shame to cover up those lovely eyes, Miss Felton.

Well, whoever you are, I'm not looking to be picked up.

Sullivan. Gilbert Sullivan.

SHE TUTS, HE CHUCKLES

Yes, I know. My parents were blissfully unaware

since they loathed light operetta.

But is complimenting your eyes a pick-up or a statement of truth?

I'll tell you. It's both.

Well, that as it may...

I'm busy.

Working a case?

Oh, I know all about your sleuthing.

How marvellous to meet the famous Puzzle Lady.

Can't wait to tell my daughters.

DENNIS CHATTING TO HOTEL STAFF

FAN: Dennis! I can't believe it's actually you, Dennis.

This way, madam, please. This way.

Dennis, I made this for you!

No, it's OK. I know him! Dennis... I'll... I'll come back!

I have to go.

It was a pleasure to meet you.

ROCK MUSIC THUDDING

KNOCKING

Come on in. Oh, it's you.

Hm. Really?

What do you want, Cora?

To talk.

A polite conversation about Sherry.

What about Sherry?

You're staying away from her, or you'll have me to answer to.

You know, it's quite a nice town, this.

I might hang around for a while. But it's a little bit small.

Can I help it if I run it into Sherry?

I'm only going to say this once.

You can leave town in one piece...

KNOCKING

You expecting someone? Yeah, I was actually.

So if you wouldn't mind pissing off, that'd be great.

OMINOUS MUSIC

Oh, hello again. I'm not interrupting?

Not at all. I was just leaving.

And I suggest you do the same tomorrow morning.

I know what it looks like, but, erm, it's not what you think, all right?

Mm.

Ta-da.

Looks like Dennis made quite the impression on Anton.

"Dennis Pride gave his all to a rapturous audience,

"proving Psychic Buffalo has lost none of the potency

"of their heyday." Coffee?

Oh, no, I'm fine. I'm gonna go for one later with Anton.

Anyway, listen to this.

"I caught up with the magnetic frontman

"just moments after he'd left the stage

"and could instantly see why his popularity has endured."

Ugh! Get a room.

Oh, come on now.

You can't blame the boy for being taken in.

You were too once. Please don't remind me.

Anyway, how was bridge last night? Who won?

Erm...

I did, naturally.

DOORBELL RINGS Oh...

Oh, don't get up.

SIGHS

Oh, my God.

What do you want? I came to see you, didn't I?

I mean, I could hardly be in Bakerbury

and not come and say hello.

You most certainly could.

You've got some nerve, you know that?

Look, I know you told me to stay away,

but I'm not here to cause trouble.

Did you lie to me?

Yes, but only because I didn't think you'd find out!

Sherry, please, let me take you out for dinner tonight.

I wanna make things right by us. Here...

Hm?

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

SNIFFS

CORA GIGGLING

Oh, what the hell?

What's he doing here? CHUCKLES

Oh...

Are you two, er...

OK. Seriously, what's going on?

Dennis is my ex-husband.

This Dennis?

You wife-beating shit.

Why don't you pick on someone your own size?

Oh, dear. Come on, I'm here.

There's really no need. No, it's fine.

CORA: Oh, dear. This is really fun.

But, uh, I've got somewhere else to be, mate.

But, Sherry, baby...

..I'm not giving up on us.

SINGING: Sherry, Sherry Baby...

Why didn't you tell me?

Don't worry, sweetheart.

I won't let that bastard upset you again.

DRAMATIC MUSIC

HOOPER: Cocaine? CORA: Mountains of it.

In his hotel room. I saw it with my very eyes.

Why were you in his hotel room? Hm!

We have history.

Or rather, Sherry does.

He is a nasty piece of work.

All right, so you don't like the guy

and you want us to screw him over on your behalf?

Thank you. If you wouldn't mind.

I do mind, Miss Felton.

I'm not here to settle scores.

It's my wife... Excuse me. Raymond?

You all right, mate? Derek... I can't find Gloria.

She's been gone all day, and she's not answering her phone.

I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation.

When did you last see her?

Uh, this morning. About ten.

Ray, mate, that was four hours ago.

Yes, but she wouldn't say where she was going.

Look, I-I've called Julien, Olivia, all of Gloria's friends.

No-one knows where she is.

It's not like her to ignore my calls.

What if something's happened to her?

Raymond, relax, mate, relax. I tell you what, go home, right?

She's probably waiting for you there.

And if she's not back by this evening,

I'll send a car out to look for her, all right?

All right. Thanks, Derek. Sorry, mate.

Relax, relax, relax, come on.

And get him home, please, mate. Thank you.

Strange.

Why the paranoia? Probably cos his first wife died.

Oh, really? Anything suspicious?

Yeah. No.

She slipped in the bathtub, banged her head.

She'd been drinking.

Even so, Ray was a suspect for a while.

They had a stormy marriage.

Raymond would never touch a hair on Harriet's head.

Would you say he was a possessive husband?

Yes. No.

So, if Ray were to find out

that Gloria had been in another man's company,

would you say he would blame her?

I guess... Probably, yeah.

Interesting.

Oh. Gotta dash.

SINISTER MUSIC

Is she here? I think I know where she is.

Come on... Take your car.

ENGINE STARTS

RAY: Gloria!

Gloria!

Gloria!

ENGINE REVVING

Gloria! Gloria! Gloria!

Gloria! Gloria!

SOBBING

Who did this?

Who did this?!

DRAMATIC MUSIC

KNOCKING

No housekeeping.

KNOCKING Who is it?

SOMBRE MUSIC

If you knew that Gloria was here,

why didn't you tell your dad when he was worried?

Because it would've ruined the surprise she was planning.

Gloria hired this place for the fountain.

All she told me was she was making some sort of music video

for their anniversary.

That's why she went to Dennis Pride's hotel room last night.

Miss Felton? Gloria told me that

she danced to Dennis's song on their wedding day.

He was here. That much is evident.

Evident from what?

Red car paint on the pillar by the gate.

Dennis drives a red sports car.

He left in a hurry, too. There are skid marks in the road.

And if I know that bastard, he's about to skip town.

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

Hi. ENGINE STARTS

No, hold on.

VAN BEEPING

THUD

Yep. That should do it.

I know how it looks,

but I only ran cos I panicked.

Then you admit that you were at the villa?

Yeah.

Gloria asked me to shoot a music video with her.

She wanted it to look like some scene from an Italian movie,

you know, with a... a fountain.

She gave me five grand. I said yes.

But when I got there, she was already dead.

Right, so how do you explain the blood-stained shirt

that we found in your suitcase?

I got it on me when I checked whether she was still alive,

but I didn't kill her.

So, why not call the police?

I panicked.

Look, I'm famous.

I didn't wanna get the blame.

I'm not surprised, you know, considering your, uh,

history of violence against women.

I'm sorry, are you citing my client's past?

Did he have any history with Gloria Hendrix?

Not that we know of, no. Correct.

Because he only met her yesterday,

and their dealings were entirely professional.

Moreover, I think you'll find Mr Pride

has no prior convictions of any kind.

No, not convictions, no, but...

just a string of complaints of domestic abuse from his ex-wife.

A Miss Sherry Carter.

Then it's irrelevant.

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

SHERRY: Of course she'd defend him.

Someone tried to kill her, she'd hand them her business card.

Do you agree, then, Dennis is guilty?

I didn't say that.

It makes no sense for him to have killed Gloria.

Hm, no sense at all.

What about the fact that he fled the scene with her blood on him?

Which rather proves our point.

Look, a guilty man would be more careful.

Isn't it more likely to be the husband?

Gloria went to Dennis's hotel room last night.

As it turns out, it was entirely innocent.

But if Ray got wind of the rendezvous,

he could have lost his temper.

A few months back,

the Gazette published pictures of her kissing another man.

Some model, a stripper called Dante.

The idiot that I work with, Colin Sugar,

he was behind the expose.

I have to say, something felt...

Something felt off about it. What do you mean, "off"?

He was pretty shifty when I asked him about it.

It made me think it was some kind of honey trap.

Hm. Interesting.

A stripper, you say?

CLUB MUSIC, WHOOPING

# Strip for me, babe Strip for you

# Strip for me cos I want you to

# Strip for me, babe Strip for you

# Strip for me cos I want you to

# Strip for me, babe Strip for you... #

Dante, I believe?

No, I said no extras.

Oh, you should be so lucky.

Wait, you're that... the crossword woman.

Puzzle Lady, but close enough.

And I recognise you, too,

from a kiss and tell piece in the Gazette.

Yeah, thanks for the reminder.

You know that bitch's husband broke my nose?

Oh. Luckily for me,

he had a fat bank account,

so I made him cough me up a settlement cheque.

A big one.

Hm. People with money don't usually, how...

how can I put this, wear Velcro trousers.

So, what happened to the windfall, Mr Dante?

It's just Dante. Oh.

And what, can't you tell?

I gave it all to a plastic surgeon who bollocksed it up.

So, bye-bye modelling career.

Oh, you'll forgive me if I don't shed a tear for you.

You lied about having an affair with a married woman,

who's now dead, by the way.

So what? It's got nothing to do with me.

Look, some journalist paid me to kiss her. That is all.

So, Colin Sugar paid you?

Was anyone else involved?

Did someone put him up to it? How the hell would I know?

ENGINE STARTS

Pepperoni is your favourite, right, Danny? Yeah.

Oh, hey, Miss Felton, do you want some free pizza?

Oh, no, thank you. Marvellous hat.

Oh. Didn't know you had a job.

It's Dad's idea. Keeping you out of trouble?

Good to see everybody so hard at work.

I have been working, Inspector, on a lead.

Me too. I... Would you care for me to share it?

By all means, yeah.

A low grade hack called Colin Sugar

hired a model by the name of Dante to set Gloria up.

Ray then beat up Dante and was forced to pay him off.

Yes, we all knew that.

Young Dante had it coming to him, if you ask me.

Yes, but he was just the honey trap.

The real question is,

who hired Colin Sugar to slander Gloria, and why?

Well, who says anyone hired him, eh?

Maybe he was just a low life journalist

trying to sell a story.

What did the pathologist say, Sir?

Ah, just that it was hard to pinpoint a time of death.

Well, luckily, I...

Well, that would be cos she was found in water.

Her, her body temperature would've dropped.

I've read that messes with the timeline,

but rigor mortis should narrow it down to like a two hour... window.

Sorry. Erm...

I'll just get back to work. Yeah.

I mean, she is right, you know.

They reckon it was some time between 11am and 2pm,

but that's hardly specific, is it?

11:54.

Her watch was broken during the attack. She died at 11:54.

Sir, we should ask Dennis Pride to see if he has an alibi

for that time. There's no need.

I know exactly where he was.

Stood on my doorstep with a dozen red roses for Sherry.

Dennis couldn't have killed Gloria.

You have to let him go.

MYSTERIOUS MUSIC

This is just bail, Mr Pride.

I suggest that you stay in town.

Well, I am happy to stay if you want me to.

Call me Dennis.

So, what's the situation with the, erm,

cocaine misunderstanding?

You're being charged with possession, Mr Pride.

But seeing as you're a first time offender,

I'll get it reduced down to a fine.

Ha! First time offender!

And by the way, thank you for saving my arse, Cora.

You're most not welcome.

HE SIGHS

Oh, hello again.

Oh, hello.

How serendipitous. I was just thinking about you.

Oh, are you working on the Gloria Hendrix murder case?

I'm not at liberty to say, but, yes, yes I am.

What an exciting woman you are.

Erm, please don't think me impertinent, but...

..can I take you out some time?

Oh...

Blunt trauma, like before?

Harriet was a single blow, mate.

This is more like two, maybe three.

Gloria was killed sometime just before midday yesterday.

And I'm sorry to ask you this, Ray, mate, but...

..where were you?

I was here, alone.

Did you think Gloria was having an affair?

What? Come on, mate. You know what I'm getting at here.

Did you follow her to the villa?

And did you...

How could you ask me that?

I've got to ask you that, mate.

Gloria never cheated on me.

And even if she did, I wouldn't hurt her hair on her head.

Cos I loved her.

SOBBING

I know, mate.

SOBBING

I'm sorry, Olivia, it's procedure

to establish everyone's whereabouts, so...

can you confirm where you were yesterday?

I was in the office. On a Saturday?

I had something to take care of.

I can't remember exactly what time I got there,

but it was late morning.

Right.

And you, Julien? Oh.

I'm a suspect now too, am I?

Well, given you're the only one who knew who Gloria was, we...

We'll have to consider it, mate.

Wow. OK, I mean, you used to take me camping, but whatever.

I know.

I was at the office too. Olivia can vouch for that.

But if you don't believe us,

we've got security cameras with a timecode.

We'll send you a link. That would be useful, thank you.

Are you finished?

I think you've upset my dad enough as it is.

I'll talk to you later, Ray, all right?

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

I can't believe Cora gave him an alibi.

Can't you? Oh, come on.

You're saying you would've kept quiet?

Yeah. Yeah, right.

You wanna leave? Nope. Why should we?

Dildo. SHERRY LAUGHS

Just ignore him. He's just trying to make me jealous.

Or maybe you are the one who's jealous.

What? No, no, I'm just... I'm just worried about Becky.

If he hurts her... Oh, please.

She will be fine. He's dangerous.

I still think he could've killed Gloria.

Think about it. The watch gives him an alibi, right?

But what if he deliberately broke it

to make it look like it stopped during the murder,

and then changed the time afterwards?

He put it back an hour so the three of us would have to vouch for him.

He is not that smart. Are you sure about that?

BIRDS CHIRPING

SIGHS

Ooh, spot of shopping?

Ah...

Ah, I've met a man.

His name's Gilbert. He's divine.

And I'm seeing him tonight.

Oh, Aunt Cora!

I'm so happy for you. You deserve a bit of romance.

Thank you, sweetheart. So do you.

Dare I ask, how are things with you and Anton?

Oh, that's a good question.

We sort of feel like a couple, but without, you know, the...

Sex, darling, you can say it.

Right, yes, without the...

That. Which is weird.

I haven't wanted to make the first move after throwing myself at him.

And I think he's been holding back out of respect for me or something.

But now things are even more complicated with Dennis in town.

Mm.

Here...

have some perfume.

Aw!

Oh, that reminds me. I bumped into Sunil today.

He's a union rep now. He wanted me to tell you something.

Apparently, a bunch of workers at Hendrix & Son -

they make designer belts, bags, that sort of thing -

they were all suddenly let go due to outsourcing.

And the building where they used to work is now occupied by...

Guess who?

Mayor Firth. Right.

One of his catering companies. And there's more.

Sunil says Hendrix's designer goods are still being made here in the UK,

right here in Bakerbury, by prisoners.

Mayor Firth's favourite workforce.

Mm. You know, I...

I heard Gloria and Olivia having an argument

the night of the concert.

Olivia was told to fix something,

but fix what?

Is that the model that was caught on camera kissing Gloria?

That was an ambush.

That pathetic little creep was just after money.

But if you don't mind, I'd rather not get into that.

What can I do for you today, Miss Felton?

Well, perhaps you could clear something up for me.

I've heard that your company uses prisoners

to make your designer goods. Is that true?

No. That's ridiculous.

I'm not responsible for that part of the business,

but I can categorically say that's not true.

Well, then, who is responsible?

I am.

Nothing happens here without my say so,

and I can assure you we use highly skilled,

unionised, locally based workers.

I don't know where you could have heard otherwise.

Oh, just a rumour.

I assumed it was inaccurate, but thought I'd ask.

I won't waste any more of your time.

SINISTER MUSIC

Hi, it's me.

I need a favour.

Uh, did somebody order pizza?

RATTLING

CREAKING

JULIEN: Of course I didn't order 15 bloody pizzas!

JIMMI: Listen, we can't send them back.

They've already been cooked.

JULIEN: This is ridiculous!

Call the restaurant, I'll talk to their manager.

Uh, wait. I'll call my boss. Yeah.

You'll be stuck in the queue for orders. Sorry, I'll...

KATY: Hi. Is Luigi there?

We've got 15 pizzas...

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

DRAWER SHUTS

KATY: Try listening next time...

The timecode proves Julien was in his office the whole morning.

He doesn't leave till well after 2:00.

Camera in the car park shows his Jag

was parked there the whole time, so he's in the clear.

And what about Olivia?

Well, she gets there at 12:45, almost an hour after the murder.

Talks to Julien, then goes to her office.

So, Olivia could be the killer?

Hendrix & Son have, erm, security cameras. Ha.

How useful.

You haven't seen anything more up to date, have you?

No. Why? Not important.

But back to Olivia.

I forgot to tell you this, but I heard her and Gloria

arguing the night of the concert.

I couldn't hear what it was about,

but Gloria had recently been made Managing Director

of Hendrix & Son by Ray,

which couldn't have been welcomed by Olivia

if she was used to operating without scrutiny.

What do you mean? I suspect

Olivia was ripping the company off.

She replaced well-paid staff with prison labour

and pocketed the change.

Right. And how do you know that?

Again, not important, but if you checked

the company bank accounts, you'd see I'm right.

You'd also find that she's renting the empty building

to one Mayor Firth,

probably as a thank you for the prisoner labour deal.

And what makes you so sure Olivia was acting alone?

I'm not, but Julien denied all knowledge

of a prisoner sweatshop, and I believed him.

What about Ray? No.

No, Ray would never exploit his workers. No, no, no.

He's a union man, is Ray.

But it's his company, isn't it?

He must have known something.

OMINOUS MUSIC

You didn't know anything about those contracts?

Course I didn't.

I leave that stuff to Olivia,

but I already told that little snake to get stuffed.

Who, Olivia?

No. Firth.

He came to me months ago with some deal to use prisoners.

I told him, "Over my dead body."

Are you telling me Olivia did it anyway, behind my back?

It looks that way, mate, yeah.

I'll fire her.

I don't care who she is, I'll fire her.

Ray, Ray, come on, Ray.

You're not in any fit state to make a decision like that.

Come on, mate. You're making a scene.

So, look, be honest.

How could that have happened without you knowing?

Cos these days, I'm barely there.

I've been working since we were 16, Derek, you know that.

Time to slow down.

Play some golf. Hm!

Julien and Olivia were running things fine, and...

Gloria has great ideas about the business.

She did.

Hey.

So, what, you, uh, promoted Gloria above Olivia and Julien? Well...

They can't have been pleased about that.

They came around.

On the night of the concert,

Olivia and Gloria were seen having a bit of a...

a bit of an argument.

Any idea why?

No.

Gloria never mentioned it.

You'll have to ask Olivia.

She threatened to tell Ray unless I put it right.

And she told me to end the prisoner contract

and rehire all our former employees.

I said it wasn't that simple.

We didn't even have the building any more. Gloria didn't know

the first thing about business. Like exploiting workers?

We weren't breaking any laws.

Lots of companies do it.

But Ray couldn't know. He'd be furious.

Well, he is.

I've already terminated the contract.

That's why I was in on Saturday. I did what Gloria asked.

Olivia, right now, Ray is the least of your problems...

because you've already admitted to having an argument

with Gloria the night before she was killed.

And we have you on CCTV arriving at the office

an hour after she was murdered, so...

Where were you, Olivia?

I stopped for a coffee at Babs' Bakery.

Someone must have seen me there.

Jesus Christ, I didn't kill Gloria!

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

LAUGHTER

Miss Felton, why are you always found

where you're clearly not wanted?

Said the pot to the kettle.

Inspector Hooper, please tell me you didn't drag

poor Olivia Lemon in here for questioning.

Yeah, she's in our interview room there.

So, she's a suspect, is she?

Even though it's far more likely to be the jealous husband

whose first wife died in much the same way.

Now, why isn't either one in the hot seat, eh?

Oh, that's right.

You and Ray are bosom buddies, aren't you?

Hm. Says a man who cosies up to anyone who lines his pockets.

We all know why you're here, Mayor Firth.

To protect your grubby little deal with Olivia,

after Ray Hendrix quite rightly rejected it.

In fact, I wonder what the press would make of you

breaking the law by exploiting prisoners yet again.

It's not breaking the law.

Of course it is. 'Fraid not.

Well...

So, even though it's perfectly legal,

the employment deal's been terminated.

No doubt that's down to your meddling.

Well, actually, no, Mayor Firth.

It was Gloria made Olivia give that up.

Hm. So I suppose that gives you a motive, Mayor.

Not that you'd ever kill anyone, of course.

I suggest you release Miss Lemon

and look a little closer to home, Inspector.

And if you can't do your job,

I'm sure the Chief Constable will find someone who will.

CORA SIGHS

We haven't got enough to charge Olivia with, anyway.

Let's have a cup of tea.

DRAMATIC MUSIC

PHONE VIBRATING

Hello? What's up?

CORA: 'Hooper released Olivia, so I followed her.'

'Yeah, of course you did.'

Wait, Julien's here too.

Olivia's spying on him. But why?

Oh! 'What? Aunt Cora, what?'

It's Dante!

Olivia's filming them.

Damn it, I can't see.

SCOOTER HUMMING

Hello.

Puzzle Lady. No.

It is you! No, no. Sorry. Never heard of her.

GASPING

HORN BEEPING

HORN BEEPING, CHUCKLING

What the hell was that?

I'll call you.

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

Oh, Jesus.

DOOR CREAKS OPEN

I had a feeling you'd show up again.

No roses this time?

Funny as ever.

Missed that.

Bit cockier now, too.

I think I like it.

Got nothing to drink?

Nope. What?!

No alcohol in Cora's house. That's new.

I saw her leave, by the way.

Yeah.

So, we've got the place to ourselves for a couple of hours at least.

So, is that your plan, then?

That would achieve what, exactly?

Prove that I'm still yours?

Look at you.

Big man, walking around.

Leather trousers, sports car,

singing the same song over and over and over.

I left you because you're violent.

But now I realise you're also just really boring.

Well, at least I'm not a frigid little four-eyes, like you.

Do you think I couldn't do any better?

No, I am sure that you could.

So, why don't you just do that and leave me alone, please.

SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

DOOR SHUTS

PHONE RINGING

Er, hi. ANTON: Sherry.

Yeah, it's me. Erm, guess who just paid me another visit?

Dennis. I'm coming over. No.

No, it's OK, actually, I, erm...

I don't need you to come over. I just...

I just wanted you to know that I am fine.

'I don't trust him. You sure you're OK?'

Yeah. 'Ring me any time.'

OK. Bye. 'OK. Bye, bye.'

SNIFFS

THREATENING MUSIC

Mr Pride. How'd you get up here?

I used the stairs.

I said call me Dennis.

I've been thinking about you.

Well, I can't help you with that, and I'd like you to leave.

What's a guy gotta do to get a bit of love around here, hey?

Dennis Pride doesn't beg.

Clue's in the name, sweetheart.

So, this is how it's gonna go. Piss off!

THUDDING Oh, ah!

Ah! Ah...

DENNIS GROANING

What happened? BECKY SIGHS

Erm... You OK?

Yeah. You just get rid of him, will you?

What the hell have you done, you piece of shit?

Becky? Hey, Anton.

Hey. What did he do? Did he hurt you?

No, no. What are you doing here?

I was following Dennis. Keep an eye on him.

Oh, OK. You sure you're all right?

Yeah, yeah. I...

Don't I look all right?

I mean, he's the one who needs help.

ANTON SIGHS But I'm...

I'm glad that you still care.

You know I do.

SUNIL: And don't come back! DOOR SHUTS

Er... No.

SIGHS

FOOTSTEPS RECEDING

Cora!

You look beautiful.

Oh, thank you.

I'm told I scrub up well. GILBERT CHUCKLES

Er, what can I get you? A cocktail, perhaps?

Well, they do a marvellous blood orange mojito here.

Non-alcoholic.

Then we have something in common. Two of those, please.

Is Cora here? No.

GIGGLING

LAUGHTER

Five...!

Five ex-husbands?

Scandalous, isn't it?

Not at all. A life well-lived.

Hm, you're very kind. Hm.

Unfortunately, my first husband wasn't.

The second was extremely kind, but mostly to other women.

The third was a compulsive gambler, sex addict and remorseless rogue.

He was my favourite. CHUCKLING

The fourth slept with a revolver by his side

as well as a succession of cocktail waitresses.

As for the fifth, he cleaned out my bank account

and still sends me pictures of himself enjoying it.

So you see, I sure can pick 'em.

Well, they're all fools.

If you were mine, I would never want to lose you.

Well, that's enough about me. Tell me about you.

You said you're here in Bakerbury on business.

Yes, a conference.

I work in finance, but I won't bore you with that.

Erm, I'm also divorced.

Just married the once, though.

And I have two wonderful grown-up daughters.

That's about it, really.

Nowhere near as interesting as you.

Although I do tickle the ivories a little.

Do you sing?

SOFT PIANO MUSIC

# I'd rather have a memory

# Than a dream

# For then I'd learn What heaven's all about

# There'd be an angel in my arms

# You fit right in the seat

# And then my heart Could just keep singing out

# I'd rather have you near me Than apart

# For then you'd know exactly What I mean

# But when I'm far away from here

# And long for you, sweetheart

# I'd rather have a memory Than a dream

# I'd rather have a memory

# Than a dream. #

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

PHONE VIBRATING

SINISTER MUSIC

# I'd rather have your kisses Than a smile... #

Hm. Good date?

Oh, my dear, it was sublime.

We talked, we laughed, we sang.

Something's different about you.

What? No, there isn't.

Morning. Oh! Well... good morning.

Coffee? Oh, yeah, great. Thank you.

Is that for your latest TV ad?

Mm, yeah. We're filming tomorrow.

Oh, damned if I can remember my lines!

CHUCKLES

THEY MOUTH

It's Danny.

He says turn on the news. Ooh!

REPORTER: 'The body of Olivia Lemon has been found in her flat.'

No! 'Miss Lemon was a colleague

'of the recently murdered Gloria Hendrix.' My God!

'Police are treating the latest death as suspicious,

'which poses the question, is there a connection?'

No blunt head trauma this time.

But contusions on the shoulders

are consistent with finger marks.

She was held under the water.

DOOR OPENS

Sir? I spoke to the neighbours.

They heard shouting at about 11 o'clock last night.

Now, they couldn't hear what was said,

but they definitely heard a man's voice.

And there are two used glasses.

So she had company, then.

Lovely!

LAUGHTER Are you busy?

Have you got a set of keys for this place I don't know about? Honestly!

I can see you're feeling testy,

and understandable given that your murder suspect

has been murdered herself and by drowning, no less. Hm.

Couldn't be a coincidence.

How do you know she...

Daniel, honest to God.

I'm sorry, sir. I realise I have a problem, OK?

Oh, come on, Inspector. Where's the harm in sharing information?

Haven't I been useful from time to time?

So, tell me about Olivia's flat.

Were there signs of a break-in, was anything missing?

Erm... Might as well, Dan.

You're gonna tell her everything anyway. Go on.

There were dresser drawers open and stuff pulled out,

a jewellery box as well.

Looked like it was emptied. Hm.

And what about her mobile phone?

We didn't find one. Why?

I'm working on a hunch.

Do you buy that it was a burglary,

or was someone trying to make it look like one?

I mean, think about it.

Three women, all murdered in much the same way.

For the last time, Harriet wasn't murdered.

She slipped in the bathtub, all right?

So you keep saying, Inspector.

Well, Olivia Lemon didn't slip in the bath,

or are you suggesting she did?

Perhaps if you'd listened to me, she'd still be alive.

That's not fair. Isn't it?

I told you it were Ray Hendrix, didn't I?

How many more women are you gonna let him kill

before you do summat about it?

If he's guilty, I'll arrest him!

I don't need you or anyone else for that matter

telling me how to do my job!

Sam, can you liaise with the forensics department, please?

And Danny, Dan, Dan...

don't say anything.

All right?

BIRDS CHIRPING

First Gloria, now Olivia.

What the hell's going on, Derek? Who's doing this?

Well, you were pretty angry with Olivia yesterday.

For making that deal with Mayor Firth.

You think I'd kill her over that?

Dunno, mate, would you?

Olivia was like a sister to me, and Julien.

We both loved her.

And yet you were willing to fire her?

I'd never harm Olivia, or any woman.

Jesus, Derek! I thought you knew me better than that.

OK, so where were you both last night, then?

About 11 o'clock.

We were here,

together.

Did anyone else see you?

No.

No.

So, your only alibi is each other, then.

Another thing, do either of youse wear underpants

with days of the week on?

Excuse me? What?

PHONE RINGING

I better get this.

Hello?

Can this wait, cos...

Oh, yeah?

Do you care to explain how you got so banged up, Mr Pride?

I tripped and fell down some stairs.

And before you suggest that he may have been injured

by the victim, my client was already visibly bruised

at the Bar & Grill where they met.

After which, you went back to Olivia Lemon's flat and had sex.

Is that correct?

Yes, that's correct.

Is the right answer.

And we also have a wine glass with your prints on them.

Which places you firmly at the scene of two murders, Mr Pride.

No, it does not.

We've already established that my client has a solid alibi

for Gloria Hendrix's murder.

Only based on the time on the deceased's watch.

I mean, it's possible the killer changed the time on the watch

to make it appear that she was killed earlier.

My client's not that smart.

She's right. I...

I don't understand what you just said,

which proves I never killed anyone.

No, it doesn't.

All right, it doesn't. But I didn't. Someone else killed Gloria.

And Olivia was alive when I left her.

SCOFFS Please!

You have to believe me.

Anton says Danny says Hooper's saying

that Dennis could have changed the time on Gloria's watch.

Yeah, that's what Anton said. Hm.

No, Anton said that ages ago, about Dennis changing the time.

Oh. It's a good theory. Wish I'd thought of it.

No, I still don't think Dennis is a killer.

I can't believe I'm saying this, but neither do I.

I mean, why turn up in Bakerbury and start killing random women?

Although they're not random. They are clearly connected.

Agreed. Now, I think the key is in Olivia's phone.

Why was it taken?

Could it be something to do with her filming Julien and Dante?

So, you think Julien killed Gloria after all?

Or both of them did?

Dante's possible, but my gut says no.

And Julien couldn't have, cos I've seen the CCTV.

As for Olivia... Cora!

Fancy seeing you here.

I'm not interrupting anything, am I? Not at all.

Gilbert, this is my brilliant niece, Sherry.

Pleased to meet you.

Likewise, likewise.

I see good looks run in the family.

CHUCKLING

AWKWARD LAUGH

Would you like a coffee? Ooh, yes, please, I would.

Well, that's mine, but I'll get you...

Oh, another one. All right.

Sir, uh, we found a clean set of prints

on Olivia's bathroom tiles.

They're a match for Ray Hendrix.

Well...

..I bet Raymond would've been in Olivia's flat all the time,

wouldn't he?

And besides, Samuel, we already have our prime suspect, so...

Thank you.

MICROWAVE PINGS

MOUSE CLICKING

CLEARS THROAT

You were Googling Gilbert.

What? No, no, I wasn't.

OK, OK, fine, yes, I was, but I just... Oh!

Look, I was just checking him out.

Well, what the bloody hell is there to check out?

I don't know. That's why I was checking.

His name's Gilbert Sullivan, for God's sake.

What kind of name is that?

And there's no trace of him anywhere online,

no Facebook, no Instagram.

Well, Gilbert is a wonderful, kind, uncomplicated man,

and I like him.

We don't all have to wait six months before we sleep with someone.

Oh, wow. Well, why don't you just marry him then?

Or actually, no, skip that part and go straight to the divorce!

She's inside.

You'll probably be frisked for weapons at the door.

Actually, I wanna talk to you.

What would you do if you knew something,

like really important information

and you knew that you had to speak up,

but if you do,

it would mean letting a complete piece of shit off the hook?

Would this piece of shit be Dennis?

SHE SIGHS

What do you know?

That he didn't kill Olivia.

I was tailing him last night,

just to make sure he didn't try anything else with Sherry.

He went into the Bar & Grill alone and he left with Olivia.

I followed them to her flat, waited outside for about an hour,

and then I saw him leave.

And I know Olivia was still alive.

She closed the blinds.

God, I hate that guy.

Why? Why do I have to be his bloody alibi, twice?

Because the Anton I know wouldn't withhold evidence.

That's the difference between you and him.

There's something else.

When I was parked outside the Bar & Grill,

I saw Julien leave.

He jumped into his car and drove off.

He seemed angry about something.

So, Julien was there with Olivia?

Must have been.

And a couple of hours later, she's dead.

Why the hell didn't you say something before?

I was going to, and, and then...

Professional dilemma.

He could have just broken the story,

but here he is doing the honourable thing.

Bullshit.

You should have told us.

We've been wasting our time

when we could have been out looking for other suspects! Like Ray.

I'm sorry to say it, sir, but maybe...

maybe Mayor Firth was right this time.

Do you want me to bring him in, sir?

No, I don't.

Thank you, Samuel.

I'll do it.

DCI HOOPER: 'Did you kill Olivia Lemon?'

Yes.

And why?

Because she killed Gloria.

I know she did.

She was always jealous of our marriage.

She thought Gloria was some kind of threat to her.

So, she followed her to the villa.

Did that awful thing.

She can't have done, mate.

Olivia was at Bab's Bakery at the time of the murder.

She was nowhere near the villa.

We have the till receipt to prove it, Ray.

There's a match to Olivia's debit card.

She didn't kill anyone.

HE BREATHES DEEPLY

All right.

I know you're right.

She didn't kill Gloria.

Cos I did.

Mr Hendrix, just so we're clear here,

are you confessing to the murder of both women?

Yes.

I saw Gloria flirting with Dennis Pride

the night of the concert,

and she was seen going to his hotel room.

After all those pictures in the paper.

She thought she could do that to me again?

Next day, I followed her.

She even admitted she was meeting Dennis.

HE EXHALES So I lost my temper.

That's all.

And Olivia...

..why kill her?

She knew what I did.

She threatened to tell because I was gonna fire her.

What about Harriet, mate?

All those years ago. Was that really an accident?

Harriet was always a bitch.

PC FINLEY: Sir, are you OK?

Er, yeah.

I'm fine, Danny, really.

Really, we solved a triple murder today, so it's good, no?

And only 20 years after the first one, eh?

That's great police work, Inspector Hooper (!)

In fact, I think I'll recommend you for the George Cross, eh?

FIRTH CHUCKLES I'm sorry.

Who do you think you are, eh?

You come in here, shouting the odds and making threats.

DS BRODY: Sir... No, I'm gonna say this, Samuel.

Here, we might make mistakes, but we do our best, Mayor Firth.

But you, see you,

you-you-you are nothing but a weaselly,

money-grubbing little tit

who doesn't give a damn for anyone but himself!

So, go on, get out!

Never set foot in my station again, do you hear me?

You'll regret that.

Do you think so? Do you?!

Cora, what a delicious excuse

to sneak out of a PowerPoint presentation.

Is everything all right?

I don't know.

That's what I wanted to ask.

SOFT PIANO MUSIC

Ask me anything.

Why can't I find you on the internet?

No photographs, no professional listings.

Sherry's right. It's like you don't exist.

Oh, Sherry. You have a good niece there

and she's wise to be protective.

But there's nothing to find out about me because,

well, I'm not very interesting.

And as for social media, well, it never really appealed.

Maybe I'm just too old for that sort of thing.

And maybe I'm too old for fairy tales.

I've been lied to by every man I ever trusted,

and they all did so with a smile just like yours.

So tell me something true.

Something true. All right.

HE INHALES SHARPLY

I was a terrible husband.

I don't know who stopped loving who first,

but it made me sleepwalk through everything

I should have cared about...

..including being a father.

These days, I try to give my daughters

all the love that I should have given them before, but...

I think they know it's more for my sake than theirs.

And that's probably why it's too late.

But I keep trying anyway.

And perhaps I don't deserve it,

but all I want now is to spend my time with someone special.

And you are it, Cora.

You utterly shine in my eyes.

Thank you for telling me that.

Can't have been easy.

There's something you should know about me, too.

Blueberry.

What's this in aid of? It's been a rough week.

Ha-ha. It's about to get rougher.

I have been summoned to the Chief Constable's office,

Miss Felton, and I'm pretty sure he's gonna fire me.

But why? Why? Because I was too pig-headed

to see the truth about Ray.

You believed in your friend.

You don't deserve to be fired for that.

Well, that's kind, Miss Felton, but...

I'm pretty sure they were looking for an excuse anyway.

And I've just given them one,

with a great big fat bow on the top of it.

Thank you, though, for the muffin.

MARJORIE: Sorry, but you can't go in there!

Mayor Firth, sorry. She just pushed past me.

That's all right, Marjorie.

Miss Felton's a pushy woman.

It's all right, you can close the door.

DOOR CLOSES

To what do I owe the pleasure?

Call the dogs off Inspector Hooper right now.

Or what? Or I will do everything in my power

to expose you as the evil little man that you are.

Lest we forget, you mowed down a homeless man

and had Anita Dryver killed to silence her.

You know, Miss Felton, you're not nearly as clever

as you think you are.

I mean, "Gilbert Sullivan".

CHUCKLES

I hired an actor to dig some dirt on you.

And not even a very good one.

So, imagine my surprise when he uncovered

so much more than I ever could have hoped for. Ha.

The famous Puzzle Lady who can't do puzzles.

HE MIMICS WRONG ANSWER BUZZER

Who in the world would believe you now, eh?

You've been lying to the public all this time

just to make a bit of money. Hm.

What a sad, useless old woman you are.

So... what are you going to do?

Tell you what...

because I'm feeling generous, I'll give you a choice.

One phone call from me and Hooper keeps his job.

But if I do that, I'll also call the press about you.

So...

whose skin are you gonna save, eh?

Yours...

or his?

Once a national treasure, now a national disgrace.

I'm here outside the home of Miss Cora Felton.

I think she's approaching now. MAN: She's here!

She's driving at rather dangerous speeds here, possibly drunk.

Certainly unhinged.

CLAMOURING, HORN BLARES

What do you have to say to the fans

now they know you've been lying to them, Miss Felton?

Surely you've got a statement for us. The people are furious.

How's it feel to be the most hated woman in Bakerbury?

Do the crossword! Why are you lying? Go on, do it!

You can't, can you?

Are you gonna give the biscuit money back?

Is it true your biscuits are made in sweat shops?

Have you no shame, Miss Felton?

Unbelievable.

People are understandably outraged,

furious, children in tears at local primary schools.

MAN: Fake and a fraud! WOMAN: You're a liar!

I've been calling you.

They've been camped out there all morning.

How did they find out? Gilbert.

He was hired by Mayor Firth.

Oh, Aunt Cora.

No, I'm, I'm so sorry.

No, you were right.

SHAKILY: I'm just an old fool.

Look, no, no...

BIRDSONG

SHERRY: Thank you for this.

It's just crazy back at the house.

So, the contract's been terminated with the paper.

No more crosswords.

Obviously that's it for the biscuit ads too.

God knows what we're gonna do for money now.

That's not even the thing I care about.

It's that bastard Gilbert, or whatever his fucking name is.

I tried to warn Aunt Cora about him, but I just...

went about it all wrong.

And now, I just feel so awful for her.

And the worst part...

The worst part is it's happened just...

just as you and I are actually really happy together.

You know, here I am with this honest, decent guy.

And Aunt Cora is just... I kissed Becky.

Uh, well, no, actually, she, uh, she kissed me.

Ah. But I let her.

It was... It was just for a second,

but it shouldn't have happened. I'm sorry.

I only told you because I love you and I wanna be honest.

Please know it didn't mean anything.

It didn't mean anything? No. OK.

And when was this exactly?

Why does that matter? When?

HE SIGHS

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. It was the night you came over.

SHE GASPS

Sherry... Just take me home.

DOOR SLAMS

Oh, Aunt Cora!

Oh, why shouldn't I have a drink?

There's nothing better to do.

Now that everybody knows I'm no good at anything.

That is not true. SHERRY SIGHS

I just dumped Anton.

Why? Because he kissed Becky

and then came here and had sex with me.

Well, that'll do it.

Hm. SHERRY CLEARS THROAT

Here is to having terrible taste in men.

CORA CHUCKLES Oh, why is it fizzy?

Um, I think the tomato juice expired.

I'm pretty sure the vodka's been watered down as well.

Yeah. KNOCK ON DOOR

I swear to God, if that is Rod Reed or Dennis or Anton,

I'm using that gun of yours.

Can I come in? Uh, yeah.

Thank you.

Hello, Sam. Hello.

I thought you should know, Hooper's kept his job.

He got off with a warning. Oh, well, that's great news.

Uh, that's not actually why I'm here.

It's about Ray Hendrix.

There's something off about his confession.

At first, he said he thought Olivia murdered Gloria

and that was his reason for killing her.

But when we told him she had a solid alibi,

he just changed his story. He said...

He said he killed all three women.

Now, I don't know, I think there's more to it than that,

and I've got a feeling you think so too.

SHE SCOFFS

Who cares what I think?

Haven't you heard? I'm not the Puzzle Lady.

Yes, yeah, I heard. Hm.

This isn't a crossword puzzle.

DOOR CLOSES

Somehow, I can believe Ray offed Olivia,

even his first wife, but Gloria?

Nah, I think he really loved her.

Hm. People used to say that about me and Dennis.

CORA TUTS Oh...

But the jealous husband hat doesn't really fit Ray.

When the papers accused Gloria of cheating with Dante,

he believed Gloria, not Dante.

And he happily left her to dance all night after the concert

with various men.

No, he trusted her.

Yeah, so why confess?

To protect someone he loves.

Like his son? If...

If he knows Julien killed Gloria,

then maybe he's just taking the blame for him.

But Julien didn't kill her.

I mean, he can't have. You've seen the CCCV.

Hm.

Oh, God...

What's that for?

You said there was a toilet, no?

Ah. He's right. CHUCKLING

I think that's about it. Are you two ready?

Yeah. Yeah.

No, uh, wait.

Oh... CHUCKLING

Cool. Very good.

OK, let's figure out this CCTV mystery.

UPBEAT OPERA MUSIC

Dante comes in through the window.

Julien goes out through that window.

Dante takes his coffee cup,

goes into Julien's office with his back to the camera.

That's it.

That's how they did it.

MUSIC CRESCENDOS, SHE EXHALES

Right, so what are we looking at?

That's Julien's office.

That's the kitchen over here.

And at the far end, and along that corridor to the left,

are the fire exit and the toilets.

Right. And how do you know that?

Now's not the time to nit-pick, Inspector.

May I continue?

So, Julien appeared to be in the office all morning.

Sometimes he's facing the camera.

Sometimes he's facing away.

So, what if it's not one man we're looking at, but two?

Julien had an accomplice, Dante, who may or may not be his lover.

Similar height and build.

Sam, can you fast forward it a bit?

So, that's Julien coming in, goes into his office.

We know it's him.

See, he's facing the camera as he goes into the kitchen.

Then out of sight, Dante climbs in through the kitchen window

and Julien climbs out.

Then Dante, facing away from the camera,

returns to Julien's office with a coffee.

How long is he in there, Sam?

About an hour and a half.

More than enough time for Julien to drive to the villa,

murder Gloria and then come back.

Then Dante pretends to go to the toilets.

Then he lets Julien back in through the fire exit

and slips away himself.

So, it's Julien who returns to his office

looking like he's been there all along.

It's possible.

You know, Miss Felton,

I know how much you need this case right now.

And believe me, I would love to think

that Ray never killed Gloria, but we have his confession.

And this footage isn't proof that...

that there was another man in there, just that there might have been.

I'm afraid it's not enough.

CORA SIGHS

CAR DOOR CLOSES

He didn't buy it. So, what now?

I guess we're on our own.

Whether Hooper believes it or not, I'm certain Julien staged his alibi.

We need more.

Like a witness.

Someone who may have seen Julien and Olivia together

the night she died.

What witness?

No, Cora, no.

No!

So, you want something from me now, do ya?

Interesting. We'd certainly appreciate it.

After all, we're family, aren't we?

I mean, I know we've had our ups and downs.

Dennis, just tell us what you saw, for fuck's sake.

There was one thing.

HE CHUCKLES

You know what else will be funny?

Me giving an exclusive to the tabloids.

"My marriage from hell with Dennis Pride."

That is a brilliant idea, Sherry.

We could certainly do with the cash.

So, Julien Hendrix left the Bar & Grill

where Olivia and you then had a drink.

He was angry, apparently.

Did you see or hear anything they said?

No.

Well, he was sat too far away.

But Olivia, she showed him something on her phone

and I heard, um, what's his face, Julien.

He said, "What do you want?"

She said something I couldn't hear and he left.

So, she could have been blackmailing him.

Well, it all fits.

Thank you.

Off you fuck.

Ugh. Oh, my God.

What the hell is that?

I don't wanna talk about it.

Shall we see what Julien's up to?

DANCE MUSIC BOOMS

So, if Olivia tried to blackmail him,

what do you think she wanted?

Money? A bigger stake in the business?

We may never know.

What's clear is, instead of just giving it to her,

Julien chose to kill two birds with one stone,

pardon the expression,

by duping his father into believing that Olivia killed Gloria.

Every bit the grieving son.

And an only child, too.

With Ray in prison for murder, he gets the house, the business,

and the fortune all to himself.

But how do we prove any of it?

There's no way of getting our hands on that footage.

Olivia's phone's probably at the bottom of the Nidd.

Maybe we don't need it.

It's enough to know it existed.

That gives us the upper hand.

OWL HOOTING

Right, so what do I do again? Very simple.

These buttons are for all the different voices.

But I just speak normally? Yeah.

And then they'll hear whatever voice you pick.

All right. OK, you ready? OK.

RINGTONE PLAYS

Hello?

HIGH PITCHED, DISTORTED: Now listen to me very carefully.

Who is this?

DISTORTED: Never mind who I am.

DEEPER, DISTORTED: I know what you did, and I can prove it.

Is this the Puzzle Lady?

Wait, wait, do I still get to call you that?

DEEPER, DISTORTED: Yes, you do.

DEEPER, DISTORTED: Now, where was I?

DEEPER, DISTORTED: Yes, I know what you did.

DEEPER, DISTORTED: Olivia sent me the recording.

DEEPER, DISTORTED: 'I want �10,000 for the flash drive.'

DEEPER, DISTORTED: Come alone.

DEEPER, DISTORTED: Any funny business,

and the video will get sent straight to the police.

DEEPER, DISTORTED: I'll message you with a location for the exchange.

DEEPER, DISTORTED: Enjoy the rest of your evening. Goodbye.

GIGGLING I think that went rather well.

Yeah. Erm, what location exactly, though?

SIGHS

Geez. Aunt Cora, how did you afford this?

I thought you didn't have any money, remember?

Oh, it seems that a murder in a holiday let

results in quite the discount. Ah.

Ah. Hello.

What the hell is he doing here? HE was asked by your aunt.

Because we need him.

Did you bring the flash drive? Mm.

You didn't open it? These things are a nightmare.

Hang on. Got any scissors? Oh, yeah, erm...

Idiot. ANTON SIGHS

Wait.

Oh, give it here. Ow!

Jesus. SHERRY SIGHS

Well done.

This is going to be a long night.

Look at that, Sam.

There, look. See? Yeah.

Is that a shadow?

Bugger me, she was right.

What? I'm not using this thing on anyone.

Wow. Heroic. What if I was being killed?

I'm sure you'd find a way to turn the tables. What?

You're not going to have to shoot anyone.

It's just to show we mean business in case things go south.

Why can't you take it, then?

Because a taped confession isn't worth a damn

if it's at gunpoint.

OK. No, don't look at me. I'm filming the thing.

ENGINE HUMMING

Oh, for fuck's sake.

Strap on a pair, OK, he's coming already.

Hello there.

Are you alone?

Clearly.

You? Of course.

I hope you don't mind returning to the scene of your crime,

but I've heard that some killers actually enjoy it.

Makes them feel powerful. Hmm.

Well, right now, I just feel bored. So can we get on with it?

My, my. You are a brat, aren't you?

Is that how you managed to persuade your father to kill Olivia?

Oh, come, come. Don't be coy.

It's actually rather impressive.

Show me the flash drive first.

For all I know, that thing's blank.

Well... it isn't.

Prove it. Tell me what's on it.

It's you and Dante on a park bench.

You tell him that your ruse with the CCTV

has fooled the police.

And?

And...

You see a woman in a large hat

being chased through the park by a mobility scooter.

Happy?

How did I persuade him?

I told him I saw Olivia with wet clothes

when she returned to the office.

That I only knew what it meant when we found Gloria drowned.

It was surprisingly easy,

but then again, my father's not the brightest button.

He built the fortune that you're so eager to have

all for yourself.

And he clearly loves you enough to go to prison for you, so...

..why would you let him do that?

Because he deserves it, that's why. He killed my mother.

You saw him do that as a child?

I found the body.

Well, that is truly awful.

But... that's not what I asked.

He did it, all right? They were always arguing.

He must have hit her and she fell and drowned.

So that's why you killed Gloria that way,

revenge for your mother?

Dad thought he could just replace her,

only this time he was all lovey-dovey.

It made me want to puke.

Quite frankly, it's a miracle I didn't kill Gloria sooner.

Hm. So, no love lost, then?

But what about Olivia?

I've heard that she was rather fond of you.

Was that any way to repay her?

Fuck her!

She tried to blackmail me.

Which should give you pause for thought, lady.

What makes you think I won't just kill you for that?

Because you've gotten clean away with two deaths,

a third would be pushing it.

So, what happened after your father killed Olivia?

How did you get a hold of her phone?

He was a mess.

Wanted to give himself up to the police.

I told him to wait.

I'd go to the flat and make it look like a burglary.

Ah, a perfect plan. Or...

it would've been if Olivia hadn't sent a copy

to the Puzzle Lady.

Lucky for you,

I'd rather improve my bank balance than turn you in, so...

..where's the money?

SHE GRUNTS, HE LAUGHS

Looks like you lose, Miss Felton.

Well, that's all right.

I didn't want the money.

And the flash drive actually is blank.

But, you see, now I have a far more valuable bit of evidence.

Hm.

Sherry, behind you!

SHERRY GRUNTS

Anton, shoot him! I can't shoot him!

Sherry's in the way! Don't you move. Don't move!

Ah! Oh, God...

Aunt Cora!

Ah! Give me the phone!

Leave her alone!

Anton, for fuck's sake, shoot somebody!

Drop it, you old bitch! Shoot somebody!

I don't know who to shoot! I don't know who!

STRUGGLING, GUNSHOT

Not me, you idiot!

STRUGGLING

Ugh! Give me the gun!

SCREAMING, GRAPPLING

Hands where I can see them! All right, OK!

OK. Ah!

GASPING

Bring her down here.

GASPING

Then we'll decide what to do with the lot of you.

HOOPER: Won't be very far away...

Ah, Sir. Did you find Julien?

No, we didn't, Daniel. PHONE RINGING

We put out an APB.

Hello? Yes. Derek Hooper.

Oh, really?

Interesting. Right, thank you.

Someone has reported a disturbance at the Begonia Villa.

Reckons they've heard gunshots.

Get the tasers, Daniel.

We... We have tasers?

DANTE: Look, how are we supposed to kill them all?

JULIEN: One at a time, in the fountain.

Well, I've got a better idea.

Why don't we just take 'em inside and we could just leave 'em.

We shouldn't have brought the gun.

We didn't think you were just gonna give it to them.

I didn't just - Oh, my God.

Will you two shut up! JULIEN: Too much blood that way.

Well, it looks like you're all shit out of luck.

Dante thinks we should just leave you tied up and make a run for it,

but then you'd be found and tell the police who to look for

and we'd have less of a chance of getting out of the country.

The police are already looking for you.

It's pointless killing us.

It would just increase your sentence.

She's right, Jules. Come on, let's just go.

Oh, relax. If the police were onto me, I'd be arrested already.

And besides, two deaths versus five,

we're pretty much looking at the same jail time, babes.

OK, but I'm not doing that, Jules. That's your thing, not mine.

DANTE SIGHS

No, no, no. Don't touch her! Don't touch her! No, no, no.

It'll be all right. It'll be all right. Up, up.

No, no. Easy. Easy, easy!

WHIMPERING, GRUNTING

Julien! Julien, listen to me!

You didn't kill two people, only one.

You'd get a mere slap on the wrist.

GROANING, GARGLING

GRUNTING

STRUGGLING

You twat! Oh!

DISTANT SIRENS

Are you OK? Are you OK?

GNOME SMASHES, GRUNTING

SHERRY: Are you OK? GASPING

He went that way. Er, Julien, he's got a gun.

And Sherry's phone

with a recording of him confessing to Gloria's murder!

One thing at a time, Miss Felton.

One thing at a time.

GASPING Here...

Julien! JULIEN GRUNTS

Julien!

I will fucking shoot you, Derek! I swear to God!

GUNSHOT

Fucking hell!

Julien!

JULIEN GRUNTS AND GASPS

Come on Julien, mate. Come on.

GUNSHOT

Fucking hell! Julien!

JULIEN SHOUTS Julien!

It's over, kid. Come on. Hey? Give up.

GUNSHOT Jesus.

GASPING

PANTING

TASER BUZZING, THUD

SIGHS

Are you done? Mm.

Aren't you going to read Anton's article?

Don't need to. I was there.

Anyway, finding a job is a tad more pressing, don't you think?

The boy did well, you know? At the villa.

Are you sure you're ready to give up on him?

100% sure. Hm.

SIGHS

I'll leave you to it. See you later.

Aunt Cora, erm...

I don't care what anyone says.

I think you're amazing.

Thanks, Babs.

Right, what can I get you, ladies? Coffee, tea?

LADIES: Tea, please. Tea, good.

Oh, for fuck's sake.

Could this day get any worse?

Cora, I don't blame you for being angry with me,

but, please, let me explain.

I-I'm so sorry.

I just want you to know that I wasn't lying to you.

Well, of course, erm, I-I lied to you.

My name is Harry, by the way.

But everything I said about my divorce and my daughters

and the way I feel about you, that's all real.

Try that for real.

SIGHS

Well, apparently this day CAN get worse.

If you're looking for Inspector Hooper,

he no longer works here.

He was fired anyway?

We had an agreement.

What the Chief Constable decides to do is entirely out of my hands.

But it seems that you, yet again,

showing up Hooper's incompetence was simply the last straw.

CHUCKLES Congratulations, Miss Felton.

HE LAUGHS

The English countryside,

peaceful, serene, safe. Uh-uh.

Foxes. They are a menace...

I must say, you've gone to seed remarkably quickly.

What do you want, Miss Felton?

I didn't mean for my actions to get you fired.

I got fired because I'm a lousy cop.

That's not true. Well.

You know, I went to visit Ray.

He finally told me the truth about Harriet. He didn't kill her.

So I was right about that at least.

I'll fix this. How?

You're just as fucked as I am. Hm.

ROD: 'Some of you we know are leaving out tins of tuna,

'tins of cat food, bars of chocolate...'

Just... trust me.

Miss Felton?

Have a look in that box there.

CRUNCHING

'They're going to come into your house,

'and they might start taking a nibble at your toes...'

You know you're not supposed to have that, don't you?

Then why give it back?

Because it's no longer my job to stop you.

And I think you might need it.

So, Miss Felton, you asked to make a statement

about your recent exposure in the media,

revelations about your fake persona as the Puzzle Lady.

CROWD IN AGREEMENT, BOOING

RESIDENT: Load of rubbish.

Thank you for giving me the chance to speak.

So far, I've kept silent,

but I realise that I owe you all a lot more than that.

'So let me be candid.'

There she is. Bane of my bloody life.

'I'm a flawed human being.'

You're not wrong, love.

And somewhere in a long, long list of shortcomings

is a distinct lack of aptitude when it comes to crossword puzzles.

Erm, what started as a small, harmless lie

grew into a big one.

And like the proverbial hot air balloon,

it was hard to let go of.

But I realised crossword puzzles...

aren't the real reason that everyone is so angry with me.

It's because I pretended to be something that I'm not.

The thing is, for most of my life,

I felt that there was something missing,

a piece of my own puzzle, if you will.

I couldn't say what it was exactly.

It was just a... a feeling that I had more to offer

than what was always expected of me.

And then...

..someone that I've grown to care about

asked me to help and solve a crime.

He challenged me at every turn.

And it was the most fun I've ever had.

And when we caught Stuart Tanner...

..it was then I knew.

I'd found that missing piece of me.

I'd found what I was good at...

..catching murderers who think they're clever enough

to get away with it.

APPLAUSE RESIDENT: Yep.

WHOOPING Yes!

So I'm asking you all...

..to give me another chance, to accept me for my real talents,

not my imaginary ones.

I hope you can find it in your hearts to do that.

I promise I will not let you down again.

Actually, I might, but I will do my very best not to,

because, dear friends, I am...

..and always will be...

the Puzzle Lady.

RESIDENT: Yes. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Yeah. ROD: Well done.

What absolute scenes here.

An incredible moment.

BABS: So proud of you, Cora. CORA: Oh, thank you, Babs.

Thank you. I appreciate that.

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