Original subtitles

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

[WIND HOWLING]

Hyah! Hyah!

They call me Siberian Sam.

The roughest, toughest Russki

Mother Russia has ever seen.

Most men freeze to death in these parts.

But not Siberian Sam!

Hyah!

What's my secret?

Why, it's this big, furry hat!

Out here, if you ain't wearing one heck of a noggin-warmer,

- you're as good as dead. - [EAGLE SCREECHES]

Whoa! Whoa!

- I said, whoa! - [BRAKES SCREECHING]

[EAGLE SCREECHING]

My hat! It's all over.

Where the heck am I gonna

find another, big furry critter on such short notice?

- [PANTING] - Hmm...

[GROWLING]

Sorry, girl, I don't know what came over me.

[SAM CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY]

[BUGS SIGHS] Oh, bruddah!

Go to Siberia, they said.

Get away from the city heat, they said.

It's affordable this time of year, they said.

Phooey!

[CHUCKLES]

Looks like my hat problem

is solved.

All right, rabbit!

The party's over!

Ehh, what's up, Doc?

Rabbit, you're gonna make me a hat.

Well, since you asked nicely...

Tacky, maybe, but I kind of like it.

Ooh! That ain't

what I meant, you idgit!

I meant you are gonna make me a hat!

Ooh, now I get it.

Well, come on.

Now, uh, what kind of hat you want, Doc? Something chic?

Something sporty? Something youthful?

Flirtatious? Something fruity?

Something cheesy? Something thirsty?

Siberian Sam

only wears furry hats.

Okay, Doc. How's that?

Ooh, I'm not playing games, rabbit!

All right. All right. Calm down, Doc.

I know the perfect hat for you.

Are you ready?

Here you go, you big dummy!

This hat ain't gonna keep me warm.

- How about now? - [SCREAMING]

[SIGHING IN RELIEF]

Ohh, that rotten rabbit haberdasher.

The hottest hat in the fashion world.

[LAUGHING]

- [GRUNTS] - This time

I'mma making my hat outta you!

Now you're gonna get it!

Byee!

Oh, no, you don't.

[STRETCHING]

That's better.

[YELLING]

[LAUGHING]

There's more than one way to skin a rabbit.

[DYNAMITE SIZZLING]

[BEEPING]

Oh, rabbit!

I realized that I may not have been the best ambassador of my country,

so I'd like to present you with this gift. Enjoy.

- [SAM LAUGHING] - Oh, you shouldn't have, comrade.

My very own Russian nesting doll.

[CHUCKLING]

Aww, how cute!

Mwah! Well, back you go, nice ladies.

What the...

Well, that was the most fun ten seconds I've had in a long time.

Ooh! You stupid rabbit, you gotta open 'em all like this.

Huh? Where'd it go?

Oh, you mean this?

Give me that!

Oh...

There's gotta be some excitement around here somewhere.

Sic 'em, Milania!

Uh-oh.

- [MILANIA BARKING] - [SAM GRUNTING]

[BUGS PANTING]

Heel, girl! It's all over, rabbit.

I got you cornered, and I'mma taking your hide.

Wait a minute, Doc. You're not really gonna

settle for a measly rabbit skin, are ya?

Just look at how thin it is.

Personally, I'd rather wear this fancy Siberian tiger hat.

Siberian tiger hat!

Only the most important people in Russia wear one of these beauties.

And now, you're one of them.

You know, with a sweet hat like that,

you look like you're going to see one of those fancy Russian ballets.

Fancy Russian ballet.

Yup! And you're in luck,

'cause I've got tickets.

Well, don't that beat all!

Can this day get any better?

Hurry up, Doc. You're gonna miss the show.

[IN RUSSIAN ACCENT] Tickets, please.

Thank you.

This way.

Fancy hat ballet.

Is very dark. Please watch step.

You sit here.

Oh, gee whiz.

Ehhh, enjoy show.

[GROWLING]

Shh.

[GROWLS]

Now you listen here,

I didn't come to this fancy hat ballet just to sit next to

- a loudmouth-- - Papa!

Oh, boy.

- [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY] - [GROWLING]

Fancy hat ballet.

- [TIGER ROARING] - [BLOWS LANDING]

[BALLET MUSIC PLAYING]

[IN NORMAL ACCENT] Hats off to that performance.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

[GRUNTING]

[SPLASH]

[ROOSTER CROWING]

So, do anything interesting this weekend, Sam?

No. Not much, I'm afraid, Ralph.

Well, no news is good news, I always say.

[SMACKS LIPS]

[ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]

[SHEEP BLEATING]

[TIMER BEEPING]

[CRASHES]

[BIRDS TWEETING]

[CRASHES]

Huh?

- [WHISTLING] - [PANTING]

[SAM BARKING]

[MUFFLED LAUGHING]

[SMACKS LIPS]

[CRUNCHING]

[CRASHES]

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

[BIRDS TWEETING]

Here, let me give you a hand.

- [PUNCHES] - See you tomorrow, Ralph.

I claim this planet in the name of Mars.

[METAL CLANKS]

[METAL CLANKS]

BOTH: This could take a while, folks.