Original subtitles

Kevin, what are you doing?

Oh, I'm getting ready for my college entrance exam.

I'm taking the SAT this Saturday, and they told us we have to bring our own

pencils.

I may be old -fashioned, but wouldn't it be more helpful to study?

Yeah, but I'd rather do this.

Morning.

Morning. Well...

in the mood for this morning? A good night's sleep.

I thought you two turned in early last night. We did.

Yeah, that was our mistake.

So how's the studying coming, Kev?

Oh, pretty good.

Come on, Marsha, we're gonna be late.

Well, you keep it up, because those tests are very important for your...

know. Because if I don't get good SATs, I won't get into a good college, and if

I don't get into a good college, I'll never get a good job, right?

That's right, so you'd better be prepared.

Believe me, Mrs. Owens, When they say pencils up, Kevin will be more than

Wesley, turn that thing off and get ready for school.

I don't know, Mr. Golvidere. I think I'd better stay home today.

Oh, no, you're going.

It's their turn to have you.

But I think I might be getting sick.

And what are the symptoms?

Something good on TV?

Or didn't you do your homework?

Maybe I didn't do my homework.

But that's because I felt bad last night, too.

Come on, Wes, are you still fooling around?

No, he's quite finished.

Upstairs, Wesley, and get into your school thing.

I don't have to.

I had a feeling it would turn out like this.

on the china never met him before who cares when you drop kick your jacket

as you came through the door no one's there but sometimes things get turned

around and no one's there all hands look out below

there's a change in the status gonna need all the help that you

can get

According to our new arrival, life is more than mere survival.

We just might live the good life yet.

Wesley,

what are you doing home?

Where have you been?

At the movies.

Hi, Mr. Belvedere. What's going on?

Here, honey, you just keep this under your tongue, okay? Okay.

Wesley got real sick at school, and the nurse tried to call here, but I guess

you were out at the market.

Okay.

Anyway, they called me out of a lecture, and I went and picked him up.

Well, I'm sure it's nothing serious.

Probably too many cookies.

Let's see.

A hundred and two?

Oh, you poor baby.

Oh, honey. Honey, go upstairs, get under the covers, and I'll go bring you some

nice hot soup.

Okay.

Too many cookies?

I think not.

I apologize, Wesley.

It's okay. I know how I can be sometimes.

It's a little late for that.

How's he doing?

Poor little guy.

I tried to perk him up with a couple of sports stories, but he just laid there

in a daze.

Isn't that the typical reaction?

What's that?

It's Wes. I guess he needs something.

Where'd you get that bell?

I'm coming, Wesley.

Hi, Dad.

Hi, honey.

Uh -oh.

Girlfriend alert.

This is Rachel Kenning.

Hello.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Dad, she's not a pilgrim. She's Amish.

Oh, right. The folksy people with the buggies and stuff.

I'm sorry.

It's okay.

Have a seat, Rachel.

So, honey, where did you and Rachel meet?

Oh, I was coming out of the big library downtown, and I started wandering

around, lost.

I was on my way back from visiting relatives in Ohio when my bus left

me. I didn't know they could do that.

Anyway, Dad, the next bus back to Lancaster isn't until tomorrow morning.

My family's expecting me tonight.

They're going to be very worried.

Well, that's okay, Rachel. Just give them a call. Phone's right over there.

Oh, no thank you.

What's the matter?

We're not really ones to go in for worldly innovations.

You know, Dad, modern stuff like electricity, appliances, zippers.

All right.

Hey, but it'd be okay if I called for you, right? Sure.

I hope you know someone else who's got a phone.

What is this magazine?

We call it TV Guide.

It tells us what programs there are to watch.

On TV.

With all these entertainments so close at hand, how do you find time for all

your sewing and canning and putting up preserves?

Oh, I manage.

Here we go, Rachel. A nice warm slice of apple pie.

Thank you, Mr. Belvedere. It's homemade.

It's delicious, Mrs. Owens.

It's my cue.

I'll go see what he needs, Mr. Belvedere.

A woman's work is never done.

Okay, Rachel.

Let's go.

Go where?

Back to Lancaster. My dad said I could drive you.

Kevin, it's over 200 miles.

Yeah, I know. So we'd better get going. Come on. Okay.

Thank you for the pie.

It was a bit heavy on the cinnamon, but I suppose that's the man's touch.

It was nice meeting you, Rachel.

What do you call this place?

We call it the barn.

Oh, right.

Anyway, it was real nice of your family to invite me to dinner.

Sorry, I acted so stupid.

It's okay.

My mother thought it was funny when you said, Would thou please passeth me the

potatoes?

Yeah, your 13 brothers and sisters got us a big kick out of it, too.

So, do all your people have such large families?

Mm -hmm. It gets the work done.

Besides, there's not much else to do around here but have big families.

Nice horsey.

Oh, this is old Jack.

He's almost 19.

She took care of the plowing for a long time, and now we take care of him.

I come out every night, and I brush him and give him a treat, keep him warm.

I'm going on 18.

Well, I'd best be getting back to the house.

Uh, yeah, I'd... Best be getting going, too.

Gotta get ready for my SATs. What's an SAT?

Oh, it's this stupid test you have to take if you want to get anywhere.

We're lucky we don't have tests.

But then we don't have anywhere to get.

Right.

Anyway, I want to thank you again for all your help.

Most people wouldn't have gone to all that bother.

Oh, no, I didn't mind.

I had a great time.

Me, too.

I mean...

It was something different.

Yeah, for me, too.

Oh,

gee, what did I fall in?

Well, around here, we call it. Yeah, so do we. So do we.

Kevin's still not back yet?

Nope. It's almost two in the morning.

Mrs. Owens, he'll be fine.

He's probably just taken a wrong turn somewhere.

Kevin's quite good at that.

Well, I just hope the kid doesn't wind up falling from his sensible shoes

It's just she's kind of pretty and kind of strange.

Kevin really goes for that.

That's true.

Look, both of you, whether he likes the girl or not, Kevin is a very sensible

young man.

And I'm sure there's nothing to be concerned about.

I am home.

Of course, I've been wrong before.

Well, honey, we were just getting a little worried.

Oh, I'm sorry. They asked me to stay for dinner, and I guess I just lost track

of time.

Did you enlist?

No, I kind of... I messed up my own clothes when Rachel and I were rolling

the hay.

What's going on?

Honey, what are you doing up?

Well, I wanted some ice water, but somebody took my bell.

Now, who would do a thing like that?

We'll bring some up in a minute, Wes.

Okay.

rabbi no you're delirious champ your brother's fine okay

you are fine aren't you oh yeah sure dad

it's just going there is like going into a whole different world i mean fresh

air and windmills and horse -drawn buggies did you know they make their own

beer great kev well

Let him sleep. It's probably bush from last night.

Good morning, everybody.

Kevin, we thought you were still asleep.

Nah, just thought I'd get some chores in before breakfast.

Huh? Chopped us up a mess of firewood.

Looks like we're in for quite a cold spell.

Mess of firewood?

It's a nice fire, Kev.

Yeah, well, it hardly makes sense to waste money on heat when we've got a

perfectly good fireplace.

Hey, Kev, when you fell in the hay last night, you didn't hit your head or

anything, did you?

Yeah, I guess I kind of did.

Well, I've got to get ready for school.

Long walk.

Wesley, where do you get that thing?

Dad gave it to me. Oh.

May I please see it for a moment?

No, you're just going to hide it.

I'm not going to hide it.

I'm just going to back over it with the car.

I wouldn't have to use it if I could stay down here.

Lonely experience.

All right, Wesley.

You can camp out on the couch.

Thanks.

Just keep covered up, and I'll go and fix you a sandwich.

Okay.

Some bologna would be nice.

Hey, champ.

Hey, Mom. Hi, Dad.

How was everybody's day?

Fine. What are you doing down here?

Mr. Belvedere insisted.

I think he missed me.

Hey, everybody.

Hi. Hey, Killer, how was school today?

Oh, fine.

Anyway, I'm going to go out back and get the garden ready. I'm going to plant

some stuff.

See? I got rhubarb.

Great. And then maybe you can plant some root beer.

I thought you were going to study for your SATs.

Uh, yeah, I was meaning to talk to you about that.

Go ahead.

I'm not taking them.

What do you mean?

I just don't see any reason to.

How about getting into a decent college?

Oh, that's okay, Dad.

Because I'm not going to college.

What? Since when?

Since he got his head turned around by that broad and the bonnet. That's when.

Look, Dad, maybe I've just been taking another look at my life, and maybe I'm

thinking there might be something better out there.

Like what? Being Amish?

They seem pretty happy.

Hey, I like being happy.

Let's all be Amish.

I mean, they don't have any electricity.

Why should we?

Why are we doing this?

I'm not quite sure.

We're trying to help your brother, kitten.

Snap him out of this Amish thing.

Why couldn't you meet a nice Jewish girl?

They believe in television.

Hey, Brother Kevin.

Why not pull up a chair and set a spell?

It's okay, Dad.

Oh,

Kevin, do me a favor and tell everybody to wash up for dinner.

It should be ready in about 15 hours or so.

Is everybody in on this? Trying to show me what a jerk I am? Kevin, nobody

thinks you're a jerk.

Dad does.

He just thinks I've gone nuts over some broad and a bonnet.

Have you?

Maybe.

I don't know. It's not just her.

It's everything.

I mean, people working the land, pulling together, knowing what you have to do

and doing it.

I mean, their whole life, it's so simple.

Certainly a lot simpler than those SATs, right, Kevin? You take the dumb things

and you do lousy, you're a failure. You do good and everybody just expects more

from you.

That's called life.

Yeah, life here.

Not in Lancaster.

Look, there's no way you're going to understand unless you go and see for

yourself.

Perhaps I could.

Anyone to home?

Rachel?

Rachel?

Oh, Mr.

Belvedere. You gave me a start.

Yes, I suppose it's hard to hear me over the sound of all that brushing.

So, what are you doing here?

Is Kevin with you? I'm afraid not. I just came to pick up his clothes.

Oh.

Something the matter?

No, no.

It's just I was intending to bring them back to Kevin myself.

Really? Yes, I mean, I want to visit him again.

Besides, I only got to be in Pittsburgh for a few hours.

That's usually enough for most people.

But it's so exciting.

I mean, all those big glass buildings and people rushing around in every

direction, doing whatever they want.

It must be a wonderful life.

It seems that you and Kevin have a great deal in common.

We do?

Anyway, I must get back to all that excitement.

Goodbye, Rachel. Goodbye.

Oh, Mr. Belvedere.

Aren't you forgetting Kevin's clothes?

Yes, I am.

Hi, honey.

Hey, champ. No cartridges on?

Yes, but I think my time would be much better spent studying.

Must be the hat.

Hey, Kev, going someplace?

Yeah, back to Lancaster. I'm going to go see Rachel.

Are you coming back?

Yeah, Mom, I'm coming back.

Good, because your test is tomorrow.

Look, I already told you, I'm not taking.

Yeah, well, you're not taking the car either.

I know.

I'm taking the bus.

Fine. Do what you want.

I'm going to go make some sandwiches for the trip. Fine.

Hey, Mr. Bogart. Howdy.

You know this is all your fault.

Why? What have I done? Nothing.

George means that whenever there's a problem with the kids, we've gotten used

you, you know.

Bucking in?

Yeah, what are you waiting for?

Sorry, George, I've been a bit busy.

I'll see what I can do.

Hello, Mr. Belvedere.

How's this?

Hello, Mrs. Owens, Mr. Owens. Is Kevin here?

Hey, Kev!

Company!

Kate Shaw, what are you doing here?

I came to see you.

Well, why are you dressed like that?

Why are you dressed like that?

Anyone in the mood for a piece of shoofly pie?

I lifted one off a windowsill in Lancaster.

Come on, George.

Wes, let's go.

Gee, don't pay to be sick around here.

Doesn't... Doesn't... I brought your clothes.

Yeah, I was on my way to get him.

I was hoping we could go for another walk around the farm or maybe go for a

buggy ride.

Well, I was hoping maybe we could watch TV or go to a movie.

What do you want to do that for?

Because I never have.

But it's no big deal.

Neither is a buggy ride once you've done it a million times.

Yeah, I guess so.

Look, Kevin, I didn't tell you, but I'm in the last month of my rumspringa.

Hey, look, I just met you.

No, Kevin.

Rumspringa is the word we use for our running around time.

The year before we settle down and take on our adult responsibilities.

It's just my running around time has almost run out.

And I guess I'm a little scared.

Yeah, I know the feeling.

Um, are you guys...

I'm trying to go to the bathroom.

Yeah, go ahead, Wes.

Yours is in the house?

Yeah.

Is it yours?

Um, I think I better be going home now.

Uh, Mom, Dad, if it's okay with you guys, I'm going to drive Rachel back to

Lancaster.

And then what, champ? And then come back here.

Got my SATs tomorrow.

That's fine.

Well, nice knowing all of you.

It was nice knowing you.

You coming straight home, partner? Yeah, I guess.

Inlet, uh, you want to go to a movie?

Yes. One of the outside ones where you sit in the car.

Room springer. Why fight it?

Oh, hot and sweaty.

I think he got the flu just like I did.

Imagine that.

You're lucky I got better just in time to take care of you.

Oh, I am blessed.

Open up. It's time to take your temperature.

I don't want to.

You could always do it the other way.

This will have to be a relatively brief entry, as I am still recovering from my

bout with Wesleyitis.

Kevin feels he did quite well on his SATs and is already scouting colleges.

Apparently, he has abandoned his Amish aspirations and decided to enjoy the

pressure and anxiety the rest of America has to offer.

Well, my temperature hasn't abated yet.

Still, there are some rewards to being ill.