Original subtitles

Come on, give me a flush.

Give me a flush. Give me a flush!

Give me a flush!

Give me a flush!

Gah!

A straight.

Hey, a straight.

Hey, Van, Elizabeth and I have a playdate with our friend Mindy, and we

want you to come. What? What? Cheyenne, can you not stand there? You've always

been bad luck.

I said Elizabeth and I have a play date with her friend Mindy, and we really

want you to come.

Sorry, I got a play date with the royal family.

You know what, Miss Van?

We have a problem. You have been really distant lately.

I know. I'm sorry.

Fine. Play your silly little game. Just help me out to the car. Yeah, but I'm in

the middle of a game. I said help me out to the car.

Mrs. H, will you sit in for me?

Oh, I haven't played poker in a long time. That's okay. My screen name?

It's screen name.

Keep that to yourself.

Okay, okay.

I'll call.

No, wait, I don't have anything.

I want to take it back. How do I take it back?

Wait, wait.

Three sevens.

Mrs. H, I'll take it from here.

Mrs. H.

Keep tapping me, you're going to lose that arm.

Why are all the women in this family so mean?

With gentle hands and the heart of a fighter.

I'm a survivor.

Mom, I want to play on the computer.

I think we have a perfectly good television over there. Use it.

Hey, Reba.

I heard you caught the gambling bug.

It's just a game. Give me your credit card.

Oh, isn't that cute?

Little chat boxes next to the other players.

Do you have to play to get a screen name?

Mm -hmm.

Because I want to be Wookiee Lover.

ridiculous screen name I've ever heard. Well, what's yours?

Ramblin' Red Rose.

My screen name is Lady Killer.

Okay, Elizabeth, you and Mindy can get a juice box.

Who's your boyfriend?

Jake.

Hello, brothers.

I'm gonna tell Mom about that magazine under your mattress.

Actually, that's a good question. Who is this?

Oh, Michael, this is my mom, Reva, and my stepmom, Barbara Jean.

Hello.

Nice to meet you. You have a lovely daughter and granddaughter.

And you've got a lovely something else.

You know what? I think I might have left Elizabeth Blankey at your house. You

know, I'll come by later and grab it. Make sure you do. I'm having a garage

on Saturday. No!

Let's go, baby.

Okay, seriously, who is that?

That's Mindy's dad.

Where's Mindy's mom?

Oh, they're divorced.

We talked about it for, like, hours. He even cried a little.

Yeah, he said he wasn't sure if he'd ever find love again.

He cried a little, too.

Well, where were the kids while you two were doing all this crying?

They were playing in the treehouse. You guys, he has the most beautiful

backyard. Yeah, he made us brunch and we picnic'd on the lawn. He's so funny,

too. He told me this story about this...

Okay, well, you had to be there.

Cheyenne, you had a date with this man.

It was not a date.

We had shrimp scampi and a glass of Chardonnay on the swing in the gazebo.

Cheyenne, honey, my honeymoon wasn't that good.

Oh, no, and I have to go back there to get Elizabeth's blankie.

Well, fix your lipstick before you go.

And throw in a little perfume.

What?

Well, I'm not saying she should date the man, but there's nothing wrong with a

woman getting a little attention from others.

Keeps the marriage fresh.

Kind of the way you freshened my marriage with Brock.

Cheyenne, you have to talk to Michael and tell him the truth. Tell him you're

married woman and you don't feel comfortable being alone with a single

He'll understand.

Yeah. That's probably best.

Remember, be firm.

Oh, I've been doing squat.

Yeah, 3 -H, winner!

Mr. H, that's like four hands in a row. How'd you get so good at playing poker?

When Barbara Jean and I were separated, I had a lot of time to think.

And that bothered me, so I started playing poker online.

Nothing huge, just, you know, fun stuff to pass the time, keep me out of my

head. Yeah, I know what you mean.

I don't like it in my head either.

Well, of course you don't. You're a guy.

We're simple. We are thinking one of three things.

I want a sandwich. I want a woman. I want a woman who can make me a sandwich.

Why don't women know we're simple?

I mean, Cheyenne always wants me to listen. That's fine. If I got a magazine

something.

But it's just, I don't know, we've been kind of strained lately.

I'm just feeling... Well, I don't really like talking about the way I feel

because it makes me feel... Well, I don't want to talk about it!

Yeah, exactly.

That's how men are. You know, we don't like a lot of the yick -yack and the

-blah -blah. Oh, don't forget the blah -blah. The only

way for a man to be happy is to get really good at pretending to listen.

but... Cheyenne always knows when I'm pretending.

Well, then you have to practice what I call half -listening. That's when you

listen for a key word that you can repeat back as proof that you were

attention.

You know, you are really good at this relationship stuff. You can tell you've

been married twice.

And when a woman starts talking, you just nod your head and say, mm -hmm.

Sometimes I'll throw in, cool.

Cool. Yeah, but listen, that's only for the really skilled half -listener,

because inevitably she's going to say something like, my cat got run over by a

car today, and you'll say, cool.

What happens then?

You buy her flowers.

Mr. H, this is awesome. You know what? I'm going to buy Cheyenne some flowers.

Daisies. Those are her favorites. Hey, listen.

Have them write something really chick -like on the card, okay?

Lay it on as thick as you can. The more ridiculous it sounds to you, the more

she's going to like it.

Mr. Ace, you're saving me here.

You are an awesome father -in -law.

Yeah, I know.

You know, it's great to have someone to teach this stuff to.

Whoa, dang.

This red rose is really good.

Take it easy. You're scooping up my money like an ex -wife.

I just love a man who gives me his money.

Oh, check it out. He's a hoot, and his screen name is Golden God.

If you look half as good as you play poker, you should be a model.

He's probably married to some pathetic sad sack.

Hey. Oh, did you tell him?

Yeah, he got really quiet.

You know, guys don't really take it that well when they know they're not going

to see me anymore.

What exactly did you say to him? Well, I didn't want to hurt his feelings, so I

told him that I really liked him, but I wasn't sure Elizabeth was enjoying her

playdates. That makes it sound like you like him, but you don't want the kids

around. Oh, no, no, no, Mom. I was very clear about the way I said it. My body

language was, it's over.

I mean, seriously, I had my arms folded.

Cheyenne, that's not clear.

Folding your arms could mean I'm cold, hold me.

It could also mean, what up, dog?

Hello.

Got a delivery for Cheyenne Montgomery.

That's me.

Who would send me flowers?

Oh, gee, I don't know. Maybe somebody has a huge crush on you, like Michael.

Oh, no, it couldn't be him.

You folded your arms.

Maybe it's not him. It could be Van.

You are the air I breathe and the beats of my heart.

I live to listen to your words.

Sounds like Van.

Oh, that's not Van.

Oh, that is just so forward.

Makes me so mad. I just want to put on some lipstick and go over there.

Flowers? He sends me flowers? You guys advance these. He is going to break.

How did this Michael guy know that you like daisies?

I might have told him the daisies were my favorite flower.

You told him your favorite flower?

Cheyenne, that is like emotional third.

It's obvious that this guy is not going to just go away.

No, what did I do? I didn't mean to lead him on.

Why did God curse me with subtle beauty and a bubbly personality?

Okay, are you ready to listen to me now?

You need to call Michael and tell him straight up that you are a married woman

and he cannot contact you anymore. Or better yet, send him flowers with a

note.

I once had a gentleman caller who kept sending me flowers against my will.

So I sent him flowers back with a nasty note, and it worked.

I never saw him again.

I mean, sometimes I sensed my photograph was being taken.

But I never saw him again.

Barbara Jean, that's not going to work. Oh, yes, it will.

This Michael guy clearly speaks the language of the flora.

Now, if we only knew what his favorite flower was. Oh, it's a tie between birds

of paradise and azaleas.

Is there anything you two didn't talk about?

Just right.

Stay out of my life or I will call the police.

Enjoy these birds of paradise.

Cheyenne, talk to Michael.

And this time, don't use body language. It was your body that got you into this

mess.

I'm going to take these flowers and throw them in the trash before Van sees

them. Do it my way, Cheyenne. I am not wrong.

I think she's wrong. So wrong. Send flowers.

Someone just took my picture.

would you?

And I'm a crack shot with a crossbow.

How about you?

Some say I remind them of an American -looking Antonio Banderas.

Especially when I dance the flamenco.

My hair is the color of the morning sun.

Hence the name Golden God.

Mr. H.

Mr. H.

Mr. H!

What? We have a problem.

I found the daisies I sent Cheyenne in the trash.

In the trash?

If you told me she was that bad at you, we could have gone with roses from the

get -go.

Mr. H, maybe I should just start paying attention to my wife.

You don't want to go there, son.

Look, just order the flowers, and we'll go from there. All right, got it. Oh,

and leave those flowers here.

Why? I don't know. Something about Barbara Jean feeling neglected and blah,

blah, blah, and anyway, I'm in trouble.

Hi.

Michael? Hey, Michael.

Those aren't roses.

No, they're birds of paradise.

Yeah, flowers are flowers. Just give me the pigeons of paradise.

I would really like to give these flowers to Cheyenne myself.

Hey, Michael.

Buddy, listen, I really appreciate the enthusiasm for the job, but I'm going to

tip you a buck either way, so why don't you just give me the flowers?

And I'll make sure Cheyenne gets them. But they're not for Cheyenne. They're

from Cheyenne.

Cheyenne got me flowers?

Not exactly.

Well, who else would she get them for? I'm her husband.

Here you go.

He forgot his dollar.

Ben, I don't think those flowers are for you.

Well... I think someone's a little jealous.

I'll just put these here so lonely people can enjoy them, too.

And I'll let you see what she has to say.

Man, don't read the card.

It's bad luck to read the note.

I had a nice time with you, and I'm very sorry, but I can never see you again.

Three years of marriage and a child together, and that's a nice time?

There's been a mistake.

Yeah, I think there has been a mistake.

And here's Cheyenne to explain it. Explain what?

Remember those flowers that you sent earlier?

Well, they were, um, returned.

And Van thinks that the note is for him.

And since I'm the only one who's not getting flowers today, I'm gonna go have

some wine.

Well, I'm waiting.

Okay, Van, those flowers, they weren't for you. They were for another man.

What? No, no.

See, Mindy's daddy, Michael, and I had what I thought was a totally innocent

play date, only later I realized that he thought it was the littlest play and a

little more date.

I'll kill him. No!

anything oh yeah it didn't mean anything huh well this lovely arrangement of

pigeons of paradise means something you know for a dollar extra you could have

had a balloon you know what fan maybe it did mean something okay

maybe i was a little more lonely than i thought and and it was nice to have

someone who actually listens to me

Talk to me, Van.

Oh. Van!

I'm sorry.

I'm just not good at it. Can you try, please?

Cheyenne, it's been a hard couple of months.

And since I've been out of football, I just... I've been feeling kind

of empty.

Then talk to me about the... Okay.

Cheyenne.

I feel...

empty.

Easy.

What else? What else?

Well, I want a sandwich.

I'm hungry.

I'll get that.

How are you doing?

You scared away from my wife, pal.

Well, you'll be sorry.

Yeah, you better run.

Van, it says you sent these.

Okay,

golden god.

We're going to call it a night.

You want to play again tomorrow?

No can do, Red Rose.

Why not?

Got a flamenco lesson?

No, you've taken all my money.

But I had a lot of fun.

Since we won't be doing this anymore, should we tell each other our real

Why not?

I live in Houston, and my name is Brock.

And my name is Kat.