All language subtitles for Jane.the.Virgin.S05E09.WEBRip.x264-ION10

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
We left Jane facing
rejection.

I'm sorry.
It's too late.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
While Jane's love life
was sinking,

her career was on the rise.

I'm a published
freaking author!

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
She started working
with her father.

What if our young lead's story
is in present day

and you and River
are living in the future?

In outer space.
[GASPS]

We can call it
This Is Mars.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Speaking of
crazy plot twists,

someone was out to get J.R.

Get down! Gun!
What? What?

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
It turns out trouble was
a little closer to home.

Oh, my God.
It was my daughters?

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Petra and J.R.

decided to work through it.

Let me show the girls
I am not a bad guy.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Also giving things another
shot, Jorge and Alba.

I know. Straight out
of a telenovela, right?

So let's get back to ours.

When Jane Gloriana Villanueva

was 11 years, nine months
and two weeks old,

she was determined to win

a statewide
essay writing contest.

You see, she wanted
the recognition, the glory,

and to get her picture
in the newspaper.

And, well, she got it all.

We are so proud
of you, Janie.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
But it turns out,
that wasn't all Jane wanted.

Why did you throw
the paper out?

I didn't even care
about the contest.

What?

I thought if I got
my picture in the paper,

maybe my dad would
want to meet me.

But it's been
a month, so...

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Yes, friends,
she wanted her father.

And, boy, did she find him.

I know. Now they're even
wearing coordinating outfits.

Not her idea.

And now,
Jane will blast us off

into the pilot story
of This Is Mars.

[♪♪♪]

Okay.

Okay. Uh, so,
just like This Is Us,

our show will straddle two
timelines, only one timeline

takes place
200 years in the future.

Ahem. A dys--
A dystopian future,

where humankind's
only hope for survival

depends on
colonizing Mars.

And there's only one man
and one woman for the job.

And one Mars year later,
or 1.88 Earth years later,

Steve becomes the first
president of the new colony.

The show will
explore the mystery

of how Earth
became uninhabitable.

And how did Steve get
that tail? Ha.

At its heart,
this is a love story.

And Steve
and Brenda's love,

which spans decades
and traverses planets,

is the strongest gravity
in the universe.

And that is
This Is Mars.

[♪♪♪]

Oh, no.
What happened?

BOTH:
We sold it!

[♪♪♪]

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Ooh, ooh. Aah!
Ooh, ooh. Ha, ha!

I'm proud of you!

[IN SPANISH]
I never had a doubt!

We would've been here
30 minutes ago,

but Dad made me learn
that dance.

[BOTH GRUNT]

[♪♪♪]

XIOMARA:
I'm so proud of you.

You stuck with your dream,
and you did it.

Jane did it.

I'm just lucky
I get to say

my amazingly talented
writer-daughter's lines.

[CHUCKLES]

What's wrong, amazingly
talented writer-daughter?

Nothing. I-I just wanted
to call Rafael and tell him,

and I remembered I can't.

Anyway, it'll get easier
with time,

and some space.

But the pitch was
just step one.

Yes, yes. We still have to
get River onboard.

She's going to love it.

[IN SPANISH]
Speaking of love...

I want to take advantage
of this joyful moment,

with the whole
family together...

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
This is it, people.

Third time's a charm.

Oh!

Alba Gloriana Villanueva,

will you marry me?

For real this time?
In front of God?

[LAUGHING]
Yes, yes, yes!

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Aw, one for
every time he asked.

JANE:
Yay!

Your love story may
not traverse planets,

but it sends our hearts
soaring to the moon.

LUISA:
Do you feel the vibrations?

RAFAEL:
Yeah.

Yeah,
it's good now.

It's all saged
and vibrating.

[SIGHS]
Great. And have you been
using the crystals

to set your intentions?
Because they can really,

really give you
what you need energetically.

Yeah. Totally.

You think this is
all crazy, right?

Yeah. Totally.

[GROANS]
[CHUCKLES]

But, still, I appreciate
your intentions.

Mm, well, I just--

I know how hard this breakup
with Jane has been,

and I...
I wanted to help.

I'm feeling better,

and it's been really nice
to have you through it.

And I also thought about
your question some more.

And...

[♪♪♪]

I am ready for
you to meet my kids.

Uh, hold on.

It's not just my call.

I still have to talk
to Jane and Petra.

The girls are really
warming up to you.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Oh, wow, that was fast.

Oh. My mistake.

Great. I mean,
'cause it's definitely

the most tickling,
skipping, pillow fighting

I've done in my life.
[CHUCKLES]

Well, their therapist
thinks it's working, so...

Are you ready for
the next phase?

Alone time with them?

Well, don't say it like
you're in a horror movie.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
I mean...

BOTH:
Come play with us.

You can keep it simple.

Just...take 'em down
to the lounge for ice cream.

I can do ice cream.

[BOTH LAUGH]
[PHONE CHIMES]

Ah, it's my mentor.

Did the bar association
get her recommendation?

Yeah. And they refused
to reinstate my license.

[♪♪♪]

I mean, I knew--

[CHUCKLES]
It was a long shot.

It's fine. I'm fine.

JANE:
But despite all the obstacles,

these two were destined
to be together.

Because at its heart,
it's a love story.

And Steve and Brenda's love,
which spans decades

and traverses planets,

is the strongest gravity
in the universe.

And that is
This Is Mars.

[♪♪♪]

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Does she like it? Is she in?

This is torture.

[SIGHS]

I love it.

[BOTH SIGH]

Seriously,
what can I say?

It's...it's out of this world.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

Perfect, perfect.

So once you sign
the contract,

Jane will dive in
and start writing the script.

You know,
I do have one note.

Yeah.
Of course, yeah.

I want someone else
to write it.

What?

But it was Jane's idea.
And she is my daughter.

Exactly. My nephew
shot a YouTube video

of his friends
rollerblading.

Do I bring him in
to direct?

I'm not signing on
to the project

as long as Jane is the writer.
No offense.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Offense taken!

[♪♪♪]

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
You may recall,
when we last saw

our father-daughter duo,
a River ran through them.

She's not a River.

She's a swamp.
She's worse than a swamp.

She's a bog!

Dad,
she makes a valid point.

I've written one episode
of television.

A Paloma-nominated
episode.

Still, I'm...I'm a novelist,
not a screenwriter.

I-I'll just bow out
so you can bring in someone

with more
telenovela experience.

Absolutely not.

This whole thing was
your stroke of genius.

When River sees your pages,
your talent will be undeniable.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
No pressure, Jane.

And speaking of pressure...

It's your lucky day.

We're all gonna make our own
sundaes. What do you think?

[♪♪♪]

Hey, you took all
the organic strawberries.

Give it to me.
RAMOS: Girls...

Hey! You snooze, you lose!
RAMOS: Put that down.

I'm not eating
that cheap, gross stuff.

Gimme yours.
RAMOS: Girls, stop it!

No! Ellie, no. Oh!

Please pick up-- Ladies--
Girls, stop, stop, stop.

Hey, enough!

Clean this up right now and
stop being such spoiled brats!

Hey, you ready?
It's starting.

Mm-hmm.
Okay.

[♪♪♪]

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Aw, it's an engagement party

for Alba and Jorge.

RAFAEL:
Hey, what's all this?

[♪♪♪]

[IN SPANISH]
Jorge and I are
getting married...

Really married
this time!

Oh, congratulations,
Alba.

Oh, I'm so happy
for you.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
So much for space.

What are you doing here?

Um, I was looking
for you,

actually.

Do you have a minute
to talk?

Sure, yeah. What's up?

Well, I know things have been
a little rocky

between us lately...
but I need a favor.

Anything.

I would really like
to introduce

Mateo to my sister.

[♪♪♪]

Oh.

I'm not sure
how I feel about that.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Jane's very sure how
she feels about that.

Luisa has been my rock
over these past few weeks.

She's changed.

This isn't the first time
Luisa claimed to have changed.

And then, one look
from Rose, and--

I know, I know.

But it...just feels
different this time.

I feel it.

Look, she's
the only family I have,

and it would mean
the world to me

if she could meet my son.

Can you give me a day
to think about it?

Of course.

[♪♪♪]

JANE:
I wanna say yes.

I-I mean, Rafael seemed
convinced Luisa's changed.

[IN SPANISH]
But?

But I don't know
if I'd be agreeing to it

because I believe it too,
or if I'm secretly hoping

Rafael will be so grateful
that he'll realize

he made a mistake
and fall back in love.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
I'm guessing the latter.

My love...

For now, why don't
you just focus on Mateo?

Hmm?

And think about what
would be best for him.

XIOMARA:
Agreed.

So you good?

Oh, well, not great.

Good enough.
Come on, guys.

We're starting
the wedding meeting.

[♪♪♪]

[SIGHS]
ROGELIO: Your very own binder.

I couldn't be
more proud.

What--? Did you use
my label maker?

I certainly did, because
I'm in charge of planning.

Ma, since your first
wedding got cut short,

I wanna go all-out.

Make sure this
wedding is perfect.

So I called
the monsignor and booked

the next available slot
for a wedding mass.

Which is three months
from now.

Three months?
Oh. I-I know. It's soon.

But I've got nothing
but time on my hands.

We can get this done.

Rogelio, you need to book
your glam squad ASAP.

Mateo, you'll be
the ring bearer.

And, Jane,
you go write

so you can help us when
you're done with the novela.

On it. Dad, did you
bring the extra scripts?

Yes.
Oh.

Some of the best pilots
I've collected over the years.

Use them as a guide.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Which brings us here...now.

How's it going?

Great.

I feel good.
I just have to make sure

that I hit the five
key structural elements.

Each character
has to have drive...

something
they desperately want.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Like winning over River?

Then an obstacle
to getting it.

The characters
need to overcome that

but get thwarted by
a massive complication

which sets them back.

Then the resolution when
they finally get what they want.

And, of course, we end with the
cliffhanger no one saw coming.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Sounds about right.

Okay. Now go.

I'm gonna dive in so I can
get River these scenes ASAP.

Great.
[CHUCKLES]

Ay.

Mm-hmm.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Huh. What's Rogelio doing

with Jane's book editor's
phone number?

Could that be our...?

And speaking of obstacles...

Why didn't
you tell me?

[SIGHS]

I knew other Jane
was gonna tattle.

That girl is
so predictable.

Look, I know
I shouldn't have

yelled at the girls
and called them spoiled brats.

I meant you borrowed
my favorite jacket

and spilled wine on it.

I totally forgot
about that.

I was gonna take it to
the cleaner yest--

Forget that.
You yelled at my girls?

They were being awful.

They're in therapy.
They're trying.

And you're supposed to
be gaining their trust,

not traumatizing
them even more.

They were throwing
ice cream everywhere

and refusing to clean up
after themselves.

What was I supposed to do,
just sit there and watch?

That would have been
better than yelling.

You weren't there. You didn't
see how they were acting.

It doesn't matter!
It's not your place!

You know what? My place
probably isn't here, either.

[♪♪♪]

So? What do you think?

Well, I'm not going to lie.
I've got a lot of notes.

But I don't want you
to get discouraged, Jane.

Just like acting is reacting,
writing is rewriting.

Of course.
Give it to me straight.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Well, here, you say Steve
is "extremely handsome,"

but later,
when his tail is revealed,

he's only "very handsome."

You know?
If Steve is

extremely handsome
in his tuxedo,

he should be equally handsome
in his spacesuit.

Or even more so.

You see, the tail enhances
his handsomeness.

Oh. Totally. Makes sense.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Does it, though?

I'll make Steve
equally handsome throughout.

Anything else?
Uh, yes.

Uh, there should be
six to eight more slow push-ins

on Steve.

And instead
of the head astronaut,

I think that Steve
should be the one

to plant the American flag
on Mars.

Okay.

[CHUCKLES]
Uh, what about the, um,
the plot and the dialogue?

Oh, the plot
was perfection.

So dramatic.

And the dialogue was divine.

Fun and romantic.
Great.

I-I'll just make these changes
and send it to River.

Oh, I-I do have one
question for you, though.

Why was my editor's number

written on the back
of one of your scripts?

Oh, that?

I just wanted to send flowers
after your book launch,

and I needed the address.

Really?

Yeah, really. Now focus up.

We got a lot of work
to do. Ahem.

[♪♪♪]

Hey, Jeremy,
it's Jane Villanueva.

Um, long time, no speak.

Hoping you can
call me back. Thanks.

Come on, Mateo.
Time to go to Daddy's.

So, what'd you decide?

When I was Mateo's age,
I always wanted a big family,

and Luisa's his aunt,
so, yes.

Introduce them.

Thank you, Jane.

[♪♪♪]

I really appreciate this.

And I know
Luisa will too.

She'll probably think
her crystals are working.

She uses them
to "set her intention."

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Hey, it's worth a shot.

Set your intentions, Jane.

Anyways,
I'll just, uh,

text her and find a time
that works for both of us.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Let's check in
on her intentions.

JANE:
I'm over him.
I'm so completely over him.

I mean, I honestly can't
believe I was ever into him.

That shirt is way too tight,
and look at

all that gel in his hair.

I am over, over, over him.

Oh, who am I kidding?

I love him so much.

Jane.

Are you okay?

Yep. All good.

JANE:
Of course I'm not all good.
I love you so much.

Okay, I should probably
get going.

Wedding planning
duty calls.

[LAUGHS SOFTLY]

Ahem. Sorry.

[♪♪♪]

PETRA:
Girls, go inside.

Jane, stay here.

Why didn't you tell me
J.R. yelled at my girls?

I didn't think
it was my place to

get in the middle
of someone else's business.

Since when? That's like
your calling card. 1-800-NOSY.

Excuse me?
Like, the one time

it could've been useful,
you decide to stop?

I'm not okay with
J.R. yelling

at my children.
I could've used the heads-up.

I'm not okay with
you yelling at me.

If you have an issue,
you should talk to her.

I'm in a relationship with a
woman. Trust me, we talk a lot.

You've talked about her role
in disciplining your kids?

Well, no. We haven't
actually talked about that.

So it's not really fair for you
to get mad at her or me.

Now if you're done
yelling at me,

I have to go get a wedding gift
for my grandma.

XIOMARA:
This way, we can see what the
dress would look like a little.

And what do you
think about

cattleya mossiae orchids
for your bouquet?

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Cattle-what now?

It's the national flower
of Venezuela.

I thought it might be nice
to have a little piece

of home when you walk
down the aisle.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Aw, I'm tearing up already.

[IN SPANISH]
That sounds very special,
Xiomara.

[CHUCKLES]
Great. I'm on it.

[IN SPANISH]
I'll see you after
my shift, my love.

[♪♪♪]

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Damn, Grandma.

Bye, Jorge.

Ooh!

Things are getting pretty steamy
between you two.

[LAUGHS]
Hard to wait?

Well, I have
just the thing for that.

This has worked wonders
for me over the years,

so I only found it fitting
to give one to you.

[LAUGHS]

[GASPS]
Ah!

When you have urges,
you know,

just think about
the flower and how...

[IN SPANISH]
If you crumple it,
you can never go back, Alba.

Though to be fair, hers
has already been crumpled.

[IN ENGLISH] Not by Jorge.
[GASPS] Ooh!

[PHONE RINGING]
Oh.

Ooh,
I got to get this.

[SIGHS]

Hey, uh, Jeremy. Thanks so much
for getting back to me.

Yeah, sorry, Jane,
I'm just not

looking for new manuscripts
right now.

JANE:
Oh, no, it's not that.
Ha, ha.

Uh, I just wanted to apologize
if my dad called

and harassed you in any way

after my book came out.

No. No, no, no, it was, uh,
nothing like that.

Ah. But something definitely
happened between you two?

Look, Jane, I promised

I wouldn't say anything,
so you're really gonna

have to talk to your pops
on that one. Sorry.

[♪♪♪]

So I talked to Jeremy.

I know what you did.

Oh.

Thank you so much.

You're not mad?

Of course not.
Why would I be mad?

Because you don't like when
I use my resources to help you.

Aha! How did you use
your resources?

I didn't mean--
I knew it.

What was it?
What did you do?

I-I promised to pay
the publishers back

if 10,000 copies of your book
didn't sell.

[EXHALES SHARPLY]
Oh, my God.

[♪♪♪]

That's why I got published?

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
If this were a telenovela--

Which it is-- I'd say we've
just gotten to our big...

Hola, mi peeps.

Hola. Ha, ha.

What did you think?

[EXHALES]
I loved it.

Oh!
Oh!

Honestly, I was worried
that, as Rogelio's daughter,

that you would favor
Steve over Brenda,

but you did
a great job

of making us equal costars.

Thank you, River.

But actually,
I disagree.

I think Brenda's
underserved by this story.

I want to see her
really shine.

I mean, your talent greatly,
greatly outpaces my father's,

and I think that should be
reflected in these pages.

You need several more
monologues, of course.

I want to give her
an additional lover

because Steve's face is gonna
be horribly disfigured

by a Martian mining accident
at the end of the pilot.

Jane, even if that
were to happen, I--

Oh. And he's gonna
lose his genitals.

[LAUGHING]
Oh, oh, that sounds like

some pretty crazy,
risky television.

It's gonna be great.
And did I mention,

I think Brenda
should be the one

who plants the American
flag on Mars,

because she's the one
doing all the work.

I am so in.

Let's do it.

Mm!
[LAUGHING]

Bye.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Adiós, mi peeps.

XIOMARA:
Oh, good, you're home. Your
abuela is being wishy-washy

about wedding colors,
and we need to move fast.

[♪♪♪]

What's wrong?

[IN SPANISH]
They're doing
the thing again,

and you're
falling for it again.

Oh.

The meeting went
great, right?

Come on! Do the dance.
Break it down. Ooh.

JANE:
Nope. No dance.

It actually didn't
go well at all.

River didn't like
the pages?

River loved the pages.

Then what's
the problem?

I am so glad
you asked, Abuela.

Dad, you want to tell
what the problem is?

He bribed
the publishing company,

and that's the reason
my book got published.

What?
No!

Be honest. You didn't
know about this?

No way.
Of course not!

[♪♪♪]

I-I'm sorry.

I just wanted to do
something nice for you, Jane.

You were still
grieving Michael,

and you had worked so hard
on your book.

And I knew
how important being

a published author was to you.
Exactly!

It was the most important
accomplishment of my life,

and it's a lie!

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
And while our Jane was
down in the dumps,

so was the other Jane.

Hey.

Do you have a minute?

I got a lot
of side work to finish

before my shift ends,
so now's not a great time.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Yeah. This isn't
exactly the bar

J.R. wanted
to be associated with.

I just came
to apologize.

I know the girls
can be difficult.

And I never set any rules
when it came to you

acting in a parenting
capacity with them.

So maybe it would help

if we set those
ground rules now.

Did other Jane
give you this advice?

Yeah, she did.

Well, it's reductive.

'Cause life
isn't that neat.

Yeah, it might not be,

but we should still talk
about what happened.

I know I messed up.

And I really want to fix this.

[♪♪♪]

I'm listening.

Can we not do this
right by the dumpster?

I think
I'm gonna pass out.

[CHUCKLES]

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Looks like things

are starting to thaw.

[♪♪♪]

[SIGHS]

[♪♪♪]

[INHALES AND EXHALES
DEEPLY]

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

[SIGHS]

[IN SPANISH]
Just checking in.

You doing okay?

Are you sure?

[CRYING]

Oh, sweetie...

I'm here.

Talk to me.

Oh, it's just, um...

[LAUGHS]
Over the past year,

when-whenever I started
to doubt myself,

I'd remind myself...

I'm a published author.

It was the one
accomplishment

I could always
go back to.

I just feel like a fraud.

You're not.

You're a writer.

Well, I can't write for him.

Sweetheart,

I understand
why you're so upset.

But don't throw away
an amazing opportunity

because you're mad
at your dad.

RAMOS:
I just feel like
a total failure.

I had zero control
over the girls,

and so I lost my cool
and snapped.

I don't have your patience.

Please.

When I give them time-outs,
it's mostly for me.

[CHUCKLES]

And you can give them
time-out too.

And hey, when in doubt,
just threaten the iPad.

Okay, I gotta
be honest.

It's not so much their behavior
in particular so much as...

What?

[CHUCKLES]
They're just so entitled.

And, well...

you know how scrappy
my childhood was.

We couldn't even afford rent,
let alone dinner every night.

I mean, that's why
I never wanted to have kids.

I just wanted
to take care of myself.

I never wanted to feel
that fear again.

I just wanted--
I just focused on my career,

and...now...

even that's gone.

And I just feel like
I'm at rock bottom.

[♪♪♪]

And so, yeah,
I-I took it out on the girls.

And I won't do that again.

And I overreacted
because...

you're right.

They are spoiled.

I went the other way, I guess,
to make up for my childhood.

So help me with it.

Okay.

And I'm so sorry

that you feel like
you're at rock bottom.

[SIGHS]

I wish I could
help you with that.

You are.

Trust me.

[♪♪♪]

JORGE [IN SPANISH]:
May I have
a good night kiss?

[SIGHS]

[♪♪♪]

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Oh, hello.

[IN SPANISH]
Stop! We should stop!

[BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY]

I'm sorry. Ahem.

I got carried away.

It's not your fault.

I got carried away too.

[BOTH PANTING]

Maybe we don't have
to wait?

After all,
we're already married.

Not in the eyes of God.

Well,
there's only two months,

three weeks,
and five days to go.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Not that he's counting
or anything.

I just wish we didn't have
to wait until then.

[♪♪♪]

But we do.

Mm-hm.

Right?

[♪♪♪]

There you are.
Lots to do.

Xiomara, wait.

Last night, Jorge and I
made a decision.

We're getting married
this afternoon.

What do you mean?
The church was booked.

I decided I didn't need
the full mass,

so I called my priest.

He's able to squeeze us in
right before choir practice

for a quick, private
ceremony.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Emphasis on "quick."

I know what
you're thinking,

but it's not just about
physical intimacy.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Emphasis on "just."

The thing is, Jorge and I
are at a place in our lives

where we'd rather be together
for all the time we have.

[♪♪♪]

[CHUCKLES]
Okay.

If that's what you two want,
I'm onboard.

Me too.

Did you want to have
any kind of reception, or--

We'll just have a nice, quick
family dinner after.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Told ya, got to be quick.

Oh. Wow. Easy.

[CHUCKLES]
Exactly.

And you don't have to
stress about

feeling uncomfortable
with Rafael.

It'll just be
immediate family.

Thank you.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Now let's get this woman laid.

I mean, married.

Yay!
[LAUGHING]

XIOMARA:
No. The cattleya mossiae
orchid.

It has to be
the cattleya mossiae.

I need them
in two hours.

Good news.
I found my veil.

Ah.

Hey, Abuela.

You okay?

Mm.

You're not feeling
guilty, are you?

Because I think Abuelo
would be so happy for you.

[IN SPANISH]
I know he would.

I was just thinking about
how different

this wedding will be
from my first.

When it was just me
and your grandfather,

starting off
all alone together.

[♪♪♪]

And now, here I am.

Getting married again,

surrounded by
my whole beautiful family.

It just feels so special.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
And speaking of family...

[CHUCKLES]
Hey, Mr. Sweet-Face.

Head to your room.
There are clothes

laid out for you
to change into. Hurry.

[SIGHS]
Thanks for getting him
here so fast.

Of course. But what
was the rush?

My grandmother decided
to get married, today!

Really?

Oh, God,
how exciting for her.

[♪♪♪]

And you should be there.

It's an important moment
for our whole family.

I will go get changed
and meet you at the church.

[SIGHS]

Why did you invite him,
my love?

Today isn't about my feelings.
It's about our family.

And Rafael
is a part of it.

Well, I'm glad.

Good.
Go on and change.

We got to get you
to the church.

We are literally
at the church.

Where are the orchids?

That is not acceptable.

Get here now.

It's okay, Xiomara.
It's not okay.

They promised they'd have
those flowers here.

I don't need them.

Yes, you do.
JANE: Mom.

Why are you getting so
upset about those flowers?

They're just...important.

[♪♪♪]

What's really going on,
Xiomara?

[♪♪♪]

I...just wanted to do
one thing for you, for once,

because you've done

such a great job
with being my mom.

And this was my chance
to finally do something for you.

[TEARFULLY]
To thank you.

Oh, Xiomara.

Especially after
the year I've had

and how you've been with me
through all of it.

[CRYING]

I never thought at 46
I'd still need my mom so much.

I don't need any thanks.

As a father,
as a mother,

you never stop wanting
to do whatever you can

to help your child.

Hey, are you guys ready?
Jorge's getting--

[♪♪♪]

Oh, I'm-I'm sorry.

I'll just...

What?

You never stop
wanting to do

whatever you can
for your child.

[♪♪♪]

Dad.

Yes?

Let's talk.

I am so sorry, Jane.

I never meant to undermine
your confidence.

And I know it was
a wrong thing to do,

but I just wanted to help.

I know.

And I know it came
from a good place.

I just have to
recalibrate things now,

about myself as a writer
and my career.

Does it help to know
that River signed the contract?

And she certainly wasn't
looking to do me any favors.

She just really loved
your writing.

Thanks, Dad.

And I do too.

And this is my career,

and I don't mess around
with my career, Jane.

[TEARFULLY]
Thanks for that, Dad.

I love you.

Thank God.
I love you too.

[LAUGHS]

[SNIFFLES]

U-Uh, I'm sorry.
Heh, heh.

Is Alba still
in the building?

She just needs
another minute.

But she's coming?

Yeah, don't worry.
She's definitely coming.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Which brings us to...

[ORGAN PLAYING "BRIDAL CHORUS"
BY RICHARD WAGNER]

[CRYING]
I can't. I'm already a mess.

[ORGAN STOPS PLAYING]

[IN SPANISH]
Glad you could make it.

I wouldn't miss this
for the world.
[CHUCKLES]

[IN SPANISH]
Since it is your intention
to enter into marriage,

join your right hands,

and declare your consent
before God and his church.

I, Alba Gloriana Villanueva,

take you,

Jorge Antonia Garcia,

to be my husband.

I promise to true to you

in good times and in bad,

in sickness and in health.

I will love you
and honor you

for all the days
of my life.

[JORGE SAYING VOWS
INDISTINCTLY]

[♪♪♪]

I join you together
in marriage,

in the name of the Father,
and of the Son,

and of the Holy Spirit.

Amen.

You may kiss the bride.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

[FAMILY CHEERING
AND CLAPPING]

[♪♪♪]

CHOIR:
♪ Go have sex a lot ♪

♪ Go have sex ♪

♪ Tonight's the night
You'll finally see ♪

♪ The glory of sex
With Jorge G ♪

♪ Go have sex, Alba ♪

♪ Don't be afraid ♪

♪ Of blue pills for J.G. ♪

♪ It's time to know
Jorge biblically ♪

♪ Go have sex ♪

♪ Say goodbye
To your vibrator friend ♪

♪ When the sex begins
There will be no end ♪

♪ We're serious ♪

♪ It will be a religious ♪

♪ Experience ♪

JANE:
These are great. Aw.

I can't believe
you got these with your phone.

Right? I was thinking,
let's make her a wedding album

since she's never had one.

Love that idea, yes.

[♪♪♪]

Was it hard today?
Not being with Rafael?

Actually, seeing him at the
wedding as a part of my family,

it was the first time
I'd been with him in weeks

when my heart
didn't just break.

It was brief.
Heh. But still.

It helps that no matter what,
we're family.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Speaking of family...

[♪♪♪]

Great news, Jane.

You're officially famous.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Aw.

Looks like Jane's picture
in the paper

brought her closer
to her father after all.

In other words, it's...

Thanks, Dad. Oh.

Thank you, guys,
for letting me stay the night.

I am super happy
for Abuela,

but I did not want
to hear that.

And I think I started to.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
For the record,

things were starting
to get pretty loud.

And, friends, I can't show you
what's going to happen next.

But let's just say...

[ALBA GRUNTS]

[♪♪♪]

[TRAIN HORN BLARES]

[BOTH SIGH]

RAMOS:
You look happy.

Why wouldn't I be?
I'm with you.

[♪♪♪]

We don't wanna
wear the shoes.

Yeah,
they're ugly.

Put them on.

Okay, no iPad.

Fine. If you want us
to look basic.

[BOTH LAUGH]

ANNIE [MOCKINGLY]:
Ooh.

I love you.

[MOCKINGLY]
Ooh.

I love you too.

Oh!
[SMOOCHING]

You guys
are pretty funny.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Aw, look at them.

One big happy family.

[PHONE BUZZING]

Wait, wait, wait.
Oh. Sorry.

Hold on, one second.

Hello?

Oh, wow.

[♪♪♪]

Yes.

Thank you.

Okay.

Bye.

What? Who was that?

Um, my mentor.

She thinks she found me
a job opportunity.

Not as a lawyer,

but in the legal field.

What? That's amazing!

Oh, congratulations.

Thing is the job's
in Houston.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
And from Houston...

to Mars.

[♪♪♪]

And, friends,
just like that,

Jane felt inspired
to write.

[♪♪♪]

Wait, this isn't Mars.

Wow.

Jane hasn't written
her novel for months.

I'm your father.

[CHUCKLES]

You were incredible,
Dad.

Did you just call me Dad?

ROGELIO:
Here's where
you're getting married.

As you can see,
the reception will

spill out onto
the soundstage.

JANE:
I now pronounce you

husband and wife.

[SCREAMS]
What are you doing?

Chin up, Jane! Jazz hands!
Oh, no, no!

[PANTING]

[♪♪♪]

ROGELIO:
I love you, Jane.

Oh, I love you, Dad.

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Beautiful, just beautiful.

Only problem:

She's supposed to be writing
a telenovela.

You're on a deadline, Jane.

Never mind.

She's on a roll.

I'll take this back
to our telenovela instead.

Mateo. There's someone here
to meet you.

[GASPS]
Hi, little man.

Are you my Aunt Luisa,
the one who made me get born?

[CHUCKLES]
LUISA: I sure am.

And I'm so happy
to finally meet you.

How come just now?

Well, I was...traveling.

But I'm home now.

Back with my family.

Finally.

So should we go to the beach?

Oh, I-I...

wasn't really planning on
leaving the apartment.

I thought maybe we'd stay in
and play some board games

Oh, come on, Rafael.
I brought beach toys.

Yeah, come on, Daddy.
Beach, beach, beach, beach.

BOTH [CHANTING]:
Beach, beach, beach,
beach, beach...

Okay, fine,
beach day it is.

[CHUCKLING]
[PHONE RINGING]

Ah. One-one second.
Wait, wait, wait.

Hello?

Rafael, it's Dennis. Do you know
where your sister is?

Yes, I do.

We just found out
that all the money

from Rose's Satin Road
was funneled into

an account under her name.

We think they're still
working together.

[PHONE CHIMES]

I'll call you
right back.

[KEYBOARD CLACKING]
[PHONE CHIMES]

[♪♪♪]

LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Which brings us to our...

[♪♪♪]