All language subtitles for Eight Is Enough s04e01 Merle the Pearl

Oh, hi, Nicholas.

How do you like your new glove?

Oh, it's great, Dad. I love it. Oh,
Nicholas, love is a word that should be

taken very seriously. You should only
say it if you really mean it. But I do

mean it.

Well, you can be proud of it.

You could admire it.

But you can't love a baseball glove.

Why?

Because it's inanimate.

It's not alive.

I don't care. I still love it.

No, you don't understand the point I'm
trying to make. It's very simple.

Love is an emotion that should be
reserved only for people.

I don't know, Dad. This glove is pretty
neat.

Let me see if I can give you an example.

Yes, now you love me and you love Abby,
don't you?

Yeah. And you love your brothers and you
love your sisters.

Sometimes. Sometimes.

Well... That's good enough.

The point is, you don't feel the same
way about that baseball glove as you do

about all of us now, do you?

I guess not.

You see?

That's my point.

So you mean it's dumb to love my new
glove?

Exactly. Okay, Dad, I don't love my new
glove.

Oh, wonderful, wonderful.

I finally got through.

I just like my new glove.

But I love my old hat.

magic in the early morning we found

when the sunrise smiles on everything

around it's a portrait

Always spend our days like bright and
shiny new dawn.

If we're ever puzzled by the changing
time.

There's a plate of homemade wishes on
the kitchen window

sill.

And it is enough to fill our...

Elizabeth, do you know where I might
find my car keys?

Yeah, Susan took them.

Susan? When?

When she took the car.

How could she? I made it clear this
morning that I needed the car. When she

home, I'm going to... Kill her?

Oh, no, no, I wouldn't. Why do you say
that? How could I do that?

Oh, the shirt.

No, no, no. This is not mine. This
belongs to our self -esteem dramatic

His name is Harvey Killer Cobb. He can't
make the tournament, so... I'm taking

his place.

Not as if I ever get to the bowling
alley.

Well, no sweat, Dad. She said she'd be
back in five minutes. Oh.

When did she say that?

About an hour ago.

Oh.

Susan!

Look, that's Merle the Pearl!

Who?

pitcher for the Cyclones. Oh.

Come on, let's go get his autograph.

Nicholas, he's only a minor league
pitcher and not even a very good one.

A lot you know. He's the greatest. He's
practically a superstar.

Whatever, but Nicholas, we don't have
time. Dad's waiting for the car.

Um, excuse me, but aren't you Merle
the...

Well, some folks like to call me that.

Well, I call you that, and I think
you're the best pitcher in baseball.

Well, thanks, Sarah.

Nicholas. Nicholas Bradford.

Can I have your autograph?

Sure, Nicholas.

Okay, I've got a pen now. Let's see what
I can write.

This ought to work just fine.

But, uh... Don't worry, slugger.

Got a charge account.

There you go.

Wow. Thanks. Come on, Nicholas. We've
got to go.

A friend of yours, Nicholas?

No, he's just my sister.

Nice to meet you.

Her name's Susan.

Well, Susan, would you like an
autograph, too?

Thank you.

Well, then, I'll be looking for you at
the ballpark.

You will?

Come on, Nicholas. We've got to go.

Next time you're there, stop by the
dugout and say hi.

Okay.

Nicholas.

Just tell him you're a personal friend
of mine.

Wow.

Hey, uh, see you at the stadium. Right,
Slugger. Hey, Susan.

I hope I'll be seeing you, too.

Sure thing.

Whew.

the best part.

Well, nice of you to return.

Dad, I'm really sorry, but I had to drop
Nicholas off at the playground. Oh,

now, don't switch the blame to your
brother. You knew I needed the car this

afternoon. But, Dad... We'll discuss it
later.

Ann Macy?

Yeah, she goes to Roosevelt High.

Well, Tommy, I didn't know too many
people from Roosevelt. Who is she,

She's my match -up for a swap dance at
the teen center this weekend. See, Ernie

and I both picked girls from Roosevelt.

Oh, I see. You're trying to eliminate
the element of surprise.

Check. Tommy, I thought you were mature
enough to accept people for what they

are, not what they look like.

What are you talking about?

I'm talking about your attitude.

It's so superficial.

Now, what difference does it make if
she's a prom queen or just a nice,

girl? I think it's a chance to meet
somebody new.

You know something, Mary? You're
absolutely right.

I mean, there is more to a girl than
just her physical appearance.

She could be very interesting. Thanks.

Yeah, Ernie, look, we gotta find out
what these chicks look like, because I'm

not getting stuck with a dog.

Thanks for catching me, Nicholas.

Sorry if I was a little wild.

Nah, I just missed him.

game, I guess.

Well, we can listen together if you
like. That'd be neat.

I'll have to ask my dad, but I think
it'll be okay.

Okay, so come over right...

Yeah, tonight they're showing Bloomtown.
You'll love it tonight. Oh, what a way

to spend a Saturday night.

I don't know. I can think of worse
things than spending two hours with

Gable. Yeah, right.

Not to mention Spencer Tracy. But
they're on TV. I need somebody real.

What channel is it on? Just a minute.
I'm finding it. Hi, Nicholas. Do you

to watch a movie?

Do you have to watch in here?

Why? Well, I was going to listen to the
game, that's all.

Well, can't you listen upstairs in your
room, Nick?

Well, not really, see. I kind of have a
friend coming over. You know it's all

right to have a friend in your room.

Well, not this one. Dad wouldn't like
this.

Uh -oh. Must be Kenny P. Lander. Uh -oh.
It's not Kenny.

It's Lou.

Who?

Lou! Louise Schroeder, that cute little
picture from your little league team?

Nicholas and a girl? She must be pretty
special.

Oh, I'll think. She has Nicholas right
in the web of her glove.

Oh, and they said it wouldn't last
through spring training. Come on, come

you guys. Leave him alone.

Nicholas, you can have this room to
entertain your guests.

We'll watch Clark upstairs.

Sure. Well, at least somebody has a
date. Oh, poor Miss Lonely Heart, I will

share Spencer with you. Oh, thanks a
lot.

Would you like for me to fix a snack for
you and your guest?

Nothing. Okay.

Abby, can I talk to you for a minute?

Oh, sure, Nicholas.

Pull up a step.

You shouldn't let your sister's teasing
bother you so much.

It doesn't bother me.

It's just that I don't know why they did
it.

Oh, well, because they've never seen you
have a friendship with a girl before.

And they think it's cute.

It's not cute.

Yeah, I know. Sometimes things can be
pretty serious.

It's not serious either.

It's weird.

Weird? Yeah.

See, whenever I think about Lou, or I
know I'm going to see her, I get this

funny feeling inside of my stomach. You
know, like the night before Christmas.

I know the feeling.

It means two things.

Yeah? What?

One, that you like Lou a lot.

And two, you're growing up.

Really? Yeah.

Really.

Abby, did it feel like Christmas Eve
when you met Dad?

I sure did.

He was the best Christmas present I ever
got.

Oh, hi.

Boy, am I glad to find you. Do you know
you're the only gas station that's open

for miles?

Sir? What do you expect on a weekend,
Mac?

Oh, no, no, but I just need one gallon
to go.

Sure, pal. You'll get your gas when you
get online.

Oh, no, no, no, but my car ran out of
gas. I walked I don't know how far.

This is ridiculous.

Hey, ain't you ever been in a gas line
before? It starts back there.

Killer.

the game gets underway, let me remind
you Cyclone fans that Merle the Pearl

Stockwell is going for his tenth win in
a row tomorrow afternoon, and there are

still limited seats available.

After that, the Cyclones will take to
the road, playing ten games before they

return to Sacramento.

Hurry up, come on in, the game's about
to start.

Wait a minute, Nicholas.

I can't stay.

Why not?

I have to go out with my father.

Oh. Since I only have a few days left
with him, he wants to... as much time as

he can with me.

Well, is he going somewhere?

Yeah, to New York on business, which
means I have to go back with my mother a

whole month early.

Well, where does your mother live?

In Los Angeles.

Los Angeles.

Hey, champ. What's going on?

Nothing.

You know, you've been acting pretty
weird lately.

What gives?

Not talking, huh?

Okay, suit yourself.

Tommy, you know a lot about girls.

Oh, do I? Nicholas, your brother here is
the master.

Well, did I forget easy?

Well, Nicholas, the first thing that you
have to remember is that no two girls

are alike.

Some forget, some don't.

That doesn't help much.

Ah, but it will someday.

Well, I don't have someday.

I need help right now.

Hey, that sounds pretty serious.

Who's the girl?

Lou.

Lou? That cute little picture you've
been hanging out with all summer?

Yeah. So you kind of like her, huh?

Yeah. She's not like other girls.

She's just like a guy.

Yep. That's the same kind of girl I
liked when I was ten.

So what's the problem?

Well... She's moving away.

Oh, I get it.

You know, that happened to me once.

It did?

Yep. Her name was Judy. Boy, did I like
her.

See, I knew what she wanted most in the
world was to have a picture of the two

of us together. But neither of us had a
camera.

So what did you do?

Well... The day before she moved away, I
asked her to meet me down at the old 5

and 10, and we'd have our picture taken
in one of those booths. You know, three

for a quarter.

Still have one of those around here
somewhere.

And old Judy still writes now and then.

She does?

Yep.

See, Nicholas, the thing to remember is
that when you like someone and they're

going away, you should do something
really special so they never forget you.

Thanks, Tommy.

Don't mention it.

Susan, I would like to have a word with
you.

A word? It's more like you're ready to
declare war.

That may be due to the fact that I spent
a perfectly delightful afternoon

scouring the streets of Sacramento in
search of a gallon of gas.

Don't look at me, Dad.

Were you not the last person to have the
car? Didn't I take the keys right out

of your hand?

Dad, I only took the car to the shopping
center. If you want to find the guilty

party, talk to... Nancy.

Hey, I'm not the only one that uses the
car around here. Yes, but did you use

the sedan last night?

Yeah, but so... Two days ago, that car
had a full tank of gas. I know, because

pumped it myself.

Today, it ran dry.

Well, what do you expect from an old car
that only gets eight miles to the

gallon? I expect the car to have gas in
it when I use it.

Daddy, I was going to put some gas in
the car, but I didn't have any money.

Do you know how much gas costs these
days?

Yes, I do know, because I'm the only one
in this family filling up the tank.

Well, you want me to throw you some pop
flies?

That's all right.

Nicholas, I'm moving in a couple of
days.

I know, but we can still ride to each
other.

Yeah, but I don't want to go yet.

I don't want you to leave yet either.

Nicholas, you're the first boy I've ever
known who knows anything about

baseball. And I thought we were going to
go to that cycling game and meet Merle

the Pearl and everything.

Boy, that would have been a dream come
true.

But your dream is going to come true.

I'm taking you to the game today.

What? And you're going to get to meet
Merle the Pearl and Perk.

Oh,

hi. May I have your attention, please?

Thank you.

I am about to present the new
conservation guideline for the use of

operation of family meals.

Tom, look, I know what happened last
night, but... No, no, no, Abby, please.

I'm not upset about last night. In fact,
it makes me realize even more that we

are taking ever so lightly this whole
gasoline shortage.

Now, I have taken the liberty to draw up
some new proposals, which I want

implemented at once. Daddy! Please,
Nancy, I will entertain questions when I

through. Now, first of all, we have to
completely re -evaluate our

carpooling system.

I expect to get one week's
transportation out of every tank full of

That's impossible.

Not with those old gas guzzlers, Dad.

Dad, can I ask you something? In a
moment, Nicholas. This is very

what I'm talking about.

Now, I want all unnecessary trips
downtown, crosstown, or any trips

approval to be out.

Does that mean the stadium, too?

Of course.

Now, trips to the market, cleaners...

the bank, that can all be accomplished
in just one outing. And I estimate if we

do this, we will save 25 % of our
gasoline.

Dad, if you're really serious about
cutting consumption, you've got to go to

source of the problem.

Yeah, Dad, the reason there's never any
gas in the cars is because both of them

only get about ten and a half miles to
the gallon. Yeah, combined.

That's not true.

Oh, Tom, the girls have a point.

I mean, these old cars are really
inefficient with today's gas prices.

need is a new car, Dad.

Yeah, one with a decent EPA and MPG
ratings.

Please, wait a minute. Yeah, Mary's
right, Dad. I mean, you can't attack the

symptoms. You've got to go right to the
cause of the problem.

Our cars are obsolete.

Now, wait a minute.

You haven't heard all my proposals.

No, I can't ask anyone from my family.
My dad's got the cars on restriction.

What about your dad?

Oh, yeah.

But it's real important that we do this
today, together.

Well, I was thinking that maybe we can
take the Stadium Express.

You know the bus that goes right to the
stadium.

Okay. All right, it stops on Hill
Street.

Meet you there.

Bye.

I don't believe you. How did you get a
hold of their yearbook?

Connections, Bradford. I get around.

Come on. Suspense is killing me. What do
they look like? I was too nervous to

look. What are we waiting for?

Oh, Macy.

Yeah, Macy. Now, remember, they were
juniors when these pictures were taken.

They've had a whole summer to mature.

Yeah.

And Macy. Oh, there she is. Second to
the last.

Oh, well.

Guess it's not that bad. It's just one
night, huh?

Hey, she's not bad at all.

Hey, really, I hope I'm not lucky.

Yeah. Come on, let's check out your
little number. Raina Hollander.

Come on, baby, be there.

Raina Hollander.

Oh, boy, did you get stuck. What a dog!

Hey, wait a minute, Bradford. That's not
Raina Hollander.

She's the next one down.

Look at those eyes.

Wow!

I don't believe it. She's beautiful.

Bradford, I hit the jackpot.

I

sure

hope the bus gets here on time. I want
to go down and see Merle before the game

starts. Do you think he'll get me an
autograph?

Sure. He does that kind of stuff for all
his friends.

I'm not going to ask any other players
for their autograph.

Just Merle.

Cleaner doesn't mean it's going to get
better mileage. Oh, no, but cleaner

a better price on the trade -in. I don't
believe it. You're giving in that easy?

I am not giving in. I'm simply listening
to reason.

You and the girls had a good point this
morning. I did some calculating, and

what with the price of gas, I think it
might be more economical, not to mention

more practical, to buy a new small car.

I admire your decisive action, but why
are you trading in the old sedan? I

doesn't the station wagon use more gas?

Oh, yes, but we need the station wagon
for the famous Bradford family outings.

Family outings? When was the last time
we had one of those? That's not the

point. There's always hope. Hope being
the station wagon?

Yes. And when it comes to hope, Tom
Bradford doesn't think small.

I can't take it. It's right next to the
dugout. I sat there once with my dad.

Well, maybe if I can talk to Merle, we
can sit in the dugout. You think so?

Yeah. Just leave it to me.

Wow! I can't believe this is happening.
It's like a miracle or something.

Nicholas, do you think if you ask them,
then Merle might show me how I fill the

curve? Sure.

I'm so happy you've sent me here today.

I'm happy, too.

What's going on?

You've got to be kidding.

Let's go.

I came all the way from Bakersfield. I'm
sorry, sir. You've got to be kidding.

They can't do this stuff.

Oh,

no. No more tickets?

Tickets, please.

We don't have any. The game's sold out.

Then I guess you're out of luck.

Yeah, but Merle the Pearl said we can
come down and see you in the dugout.

Well, that's fine, but first you need a
ticket to get into the grandstand.

But... I'm sorry, but you'll have to
step aside so these other folks can get

What do we do now?

I don't know. Let me think.

What rotten luck.

My big chance to meet Merle the Pearl,
and we can't even get in the game.

You sure this will work?

It's how Kenny P. Landers gets into all
the games. Kenny P. Landers? The two

that stole the flag from the Little
League field?

Yeah. Hurry up.

Way to go.

Come on, let's go to the dugout and find
the turtle.

May I see your tickets, please?

A little more syrup?

No, I got plenty, really.

Really.

Ernie, how you getting to the dance
Friday night?

I don't know.

Double with somebody, I guess.

Oh, that's a drag.

Well, I don't have my own wheels.

I know, and that's why I was thinking.

How would you like to use my van Friday
night?

You kidding?

No.

Wait a minute, Bradford. How come you're
so generous all of a sudden?

Dave, friends do favors for friends.

Okay.

Friend. What do you want?

Just a simple trade.

My van and Anne Macy for Raina
Hollander.

Bradford, I'd have to be crazy to give a
date with a fox like that.

Now, Ernie, Ernie, picture this.

It's after the dance, and you're in my
van, Anne Macy at your side, high atop

lookout point.

Moonlight falls through the windshield
like a prism.

And you turn to Anne.

And wish she looked like Raina.

Oh, come on, Ernie. What can you tell
from a yearbook photo?

I mean, they're always touched up
anyway.

Besides, you can't even see who you're
with at lookout point.

That's true.

And one thing's for sure.

You can't double at lookout point.

Believe me, come Friday night, you'll be
thanking me for this. Yeah, yeah. Just

make sure there's a full tank of gas.

I'll line up at the crack of dawn.

Tommy, have you seen Nicholas?

Yeah, Dad. He said something about going
over to lose.

Oh, he's going to miss the big surprise.

Are you ready to go?

Oh, yeah.

I'm all set.

I like it.

I think it's kind of cute.

I think it's kind of small.

Just so it's big on mileage.

Well, one thing's for sure.

Nicholas is going to like it.

It's the only car we've had where he
could see over the dashboard.

We'll need a day for prep. Can you pick
it up tomorrow?

Oh, yeah, that's no problem.

You're certainly making a wise move, Mr.
Bradford. With the price of gas going

out of sight today, a family man needs
fuel economy.

I know. I learned the hard way. Did you
see the EPA estimates on that model? You

can drive for weeks on one tank full.

Well, I'll settle for three days.

Now we come to the business of the trade
-in. Oh, yes. Well, I have a nice clean

trade -in. It's outside.

Oh, won't be necessary.

Oh? We go strictly by the book.

Oh, isn't that nice?

Let's see. That was an older four -door
sedan.

Hmm.

I can see why you're getting rid of it.

Oh, no, no, no.

I paid three times this amount for it.
I'm sure you did, but we'll be lucky to

unload it at any price.

Nobody wants a gas guzzler these days,
Mr. Bradford. Remember.

ERAs and my MPGs. Exactly.

Well, listen, could I ask you one more
question, and then I won't bother you

anymore? How many people can the car
seat comfortably, I mean? Oh, that

I'd say four or...

Are all these yours?

Oh, yes.

So, uh, who needs comfort when you're
saving gas?

So, it'll be up to Turner, Bigelow, and
Thompson to put the pair of runs across

the plate for one of the most impressive
winning streaks in the annals of minor

league baseball. Yeah,

get some runs.

Turner steps in and looks at a curveball
for called stripe one.

What are you doing?

Yeah, it's the bottom of the ninth.

All right, thanks. Yeah.

All right, you two.

No parents have called in to claim a
pair of lost kids.

So tell me who you are and how to get in
touch with your folks.

Not until we get to see the Pearl.

Yeah, he's a personal friend of Merle
the Pearl's.

I know, I know.

He's not going to like this when I tell
him that you held us prisoner.

I'm only holding you prisoner until your
folks come.

Now tell me your name.

We're not talking.

Yeah, our lips are zipped.

That's number two for the Cyclones, and
the last hope for preserving Merle the

Pearl's streak lies with second baseman
Chico Escuela. Come on, Chico.

Yeah, get a hit.

Thompson takes his lead off third.

Here's the wind -up and the pitch to
Escuela. He swings and hits a high drive

deep left.

It's sending the left fielder back, way
back to the wall. He jumps. He's got it.

Oh, my, what a catch.

There goes Pearl Street.

Okay, you guys, that game's over.

Now let's end this one. What do you say?

Nicholas!

What do you think you're doing?

That's the pearl. You gotta stop him.

Merle! Hey, Merle.

Can you do me a favor? Come here for a
minute.

What do you think?

These kids here say they know you.

Know me? I ain't never seen these kids
before.

Nicholas Bradford. That's the worst lie
anyone ever told me. All this, and he

doesn't even know me. Hello, you.

My name is Louise Shorter. My father
lives at 1230 South Clarington Avenue.

Hello, may I speak to Raina Hollander,
please?

Raina. Hi, this is Tommy Bradford.

Right, I'm your date for the swap dance.

Yeah, I'm looking forward to it, too.

Hey, I was thinking, um, why wait until
Friday night?

Maybe we could get together a little
sooner?

Well, how about this afternoon?

Great.

All right, I'll meet you at Frankie's
Fish and Chips in a half hour.

All right.

Bye -bye.

I don't believe it.

He said he didn't even know you?

Nikki,

the other day at the store, he was just
showing off.

Yeah, but Lou wanted to meet Merle
before she moved.

And Tommy said that if you like someone
and they're moving away, you should do

something special for them so they'll
never forget you. Hmm, Tommy said that?

Yeah, and now that Merle said that, he
didn't even know me.

Lou thought you made up the whole story.

Yeah, and now she won't even talk to me
so I can explain.

Oh, that no -talent glory hound. He
can't treat kids like that.

Tell that to Merle the Pearl.

That's exactly what I intend to do.

Doesn't it look great? Oh, I love that
color.

It waxes everything. Yeah, it looks
great.

Hey!

Come on.

Hold it, hold it, hold it. Now listen to
me. We bought this car to save gas and

money. JoyRides accomplishes neither
now. This car can only be used for

essential trips, and that's all.

Yeah, well, I think you're right, Dad.
And my appointment is essential.

Hold it, hold it, not so fast. What
happened? What happened to priorities,

Hey, what do you have to go that's so
important? What do you mean, what do I

have to go? They're all intelligent
people. We can discuss them.

That's what I am all the time.

Forget it.

Define Merle the squirrel.

What, you call that essential?

Yes, I have one very swelled head to
deflate.

Oh, she misses the point. What about
priorities?

Stockwell. Hey, I know you.

I grow a sporting goods store.

Oh, so you remember me, huh?

I make it a point to never forget a
pretty face.

Oh, but you make it a point to forget
your fans?

Well, I'm afraid I don't catch your
drift.

Yeah, well, yesterday my brother
Nicholas came all the way out here to

you to his little girlfriend, and you
totally ignored him.

Yesterday?

You mean those kids in the office? That
was your brother? Mm -hmm.

Oh, man, I'm sorry about that, but you
know how it is. My streak got snapped

and... Is that all you care about is
your winning streak?

Honey, I'm a ball player.

I know what you are, and don't call me
honey.

Back where I come from, it's nice to
call someone honey.

Yeah, well, you're here now, and what
I'm trying to tell you is that there are

couple of the kids who used to think of
you as their hero, and all you did was

break their heart.

Hey, I said I was sorry.

What you don't seem to understand is
that streak was my ticket to the big

leagues. When I lost that game, I was so
out of it, I could hardly see two feet

in front of me, let alone recognize your
little brother.

Still no excuse for what you did.

How many times do I have to say I'm
sorry?

Until you really mean it.

Hey, wait a minute, girl.

Come back here.

Okay, Pearl, save that for off the
field.

But, Coach, you don't understand.

Of course not. I've only been around for
35 years. You can explain it all to me

right after you finish your workout.

Hi, Irina. I'm Tommy Bradford. Tommy?
How'd you know who I was? You've never

even seen me before.

Oh, well, ESP is kind of a hobby of
mine.

Really? Oh, yeah. I perceive a lot of
things.

Extrasensory, of course. Wow, that's
radical.

Yeah, like right now I'm picking up some
very strong vibrations.

What? What? Tell me.

Well, I get this flash that there's
something very special between us.

You do?

Oh, yeah.

Like our relationship is going way
beyond Friday night's dance. You know

something? I get the same feeling.

You do?

All right.

What do you say we get out of this place
and go for a ride somewhere?

I love it.

Come on, let's go.

Finally. Hey, hold on there, will you?

Come on, give a guy a break.

You're not welcome here.

Do you know how many Bradfords there are
in Sacramento?

Oh, well, if you came all the way to ask
me that, the answer is 42.

Hold on a minute.

Brother, it must be true what they say
about redheads, because you are as

as an Arkansas mule. I am not.

Now, just what do you want?

I want to apologize.

Well, I accept. Goodbye.

You're a misery. You know that.

Look, I came here to see your brother,
okay?

I want to tell him I'm sorry.

Oh.

No.

I cannot see him.

I guess so.

He's upstairs in his room.

Erasing your name off of his baseball.

How's it going, Slugger?

What are you doing here?

I, uh, I came over to do right by a
friend.

I'm not your friend. You didn't even
know me yesterday.

I know, Slugger.

You see, yesterday I was lowering the
snake's belly, what, with my streak

snapped and all.

I was so caught up in my own troubles, I
didn't give two licks about anybody

else.

Oh.

Heck, Nicholas, I never would have done
it if I knew how much it meant to you

and your girl.

Now, if there's anything I can do to
patch things up between you and... Lou.

Lou?

Anything at all, I'd be glad to oblige.

Hey, Nicholas, why don't you call up Lou
and tell her Merle's here?

He'll sign her baseball now.

Heck, tell her I'll sign her baseball or
bat or glove.

I'll even sign home plate and give it to
her if it'll do any good.

Nah, it wouldn't do any good. She'd just
think I'm lying again.

Yeah.

In that case, we're just gonna have to
find the little lady and prove you're

not.

You mean... You'd do that for me?

You bet.

We, uh, we friends again?

Uh -huh.

Uh,

are you sure it's okay? I mean, that's
your pitching arm.

Oh.

Slugger, the day I have to give up
shaking hands with a pal is the day I

pitching.

Come on, Slugger, give it a rap.

Hello.

Nicholas, I said I didn't want to see
you, and I mean it. Wait.

I wanted you to meet a friend of mine.

Oh, sure. Who is it this time?

Just come out and see.

I don't believe this. Do you have any
idea where the keys to the new car are?

Yeah, Joanie's got them. Where is she?

At rehearsal.

Oh, shucks. It was my turn.

Why didn't she use the station wagon?

The station wagon? Dad, I thought she
wanted us to conserve energy.

That dinosaur eats gas like crazy. The
only chance I ever got to drive the new

car was on the way home from the
showroom.

Sorry, Dad.

By the time I get behind the wheel, the
new car smell will be gone.

Cody, wait a minute. The keys to the
car?

Oh, the new car, Dad. It is great. It
drives like a charm. And you know what?

went to rehearsal, I did all my errands,
and it still reads a full tank of gas.

Great, huh? That's nice to hear, but I'm
dying to find out for myself.

Now that you can.

Daddy, it's about time you got back. I'm
a half hour late.

Abby, the keys.

Oh, come in. The car.

She doesn't understand.

Oh, shucks.

You know, that was really nice of you to
sign Lou's boss. She was so excited.

Heck, it was the least I could do after
what happened, you know. Oh, still very

sweet.

I have my moments.

Yeah, so do I. I like my moment at the
stadium.

Well, I'm really sorry I had to give you
such a hard time.

Nothing to be sorry about. I had it
coming.

Oh, I didn't take your feelings into
consideration. I guess I was kind of

like an Arkansas mule.

Yeah, maybe a little.

I was not.

Well, I was just agreeing with you. Oh,
yes.

Do

you

have

a girlfriend back in Arkansas?

Nope. Would you have one here?

Well, if you'd asked me that two days
ago, I would have said no, but now I'm

too sure.

You met somebody?

Yep.

Oh.

Real cute.

In an ornery sort of way.

Yeah?

Yeah.

And she's real smart.

Kind of girl I need to keep me in line

And she is the

prettiest girl I've ever seen

I'm never going to play with this ball.

I'm going to keep it just the way it is.

Yeah, that's a good idea.

Meeting Merle the Pearl was the neatest
thing that ever happened to me.

I'm sorry I didn't believe he was your
friend, Nicholas.

That's okay.

Yesterday I didn't believe it myself.

Nicholas, will you do me a favor?

Sure, what?

Will you sign my ball, too?

Yeah.

I like it even better than Rose.

Really?

Nicholas, you're the nicest boy I've
ever known.

I'll never forget you, Nicholas.

Ever.

Well, Bradford, I'm here to pick up my
wheels for tonight.

Yeah, Ernie, listen, I was thinking. I
was kind of a jerk the other day. Hey,

that's cool.

I don't care.

Oh, no, no. I mean, you really should go
out with Raina Hollander. I mean, after

all, she was your date. I had no...
Forget it.

But... I got together with Ann Macy last
night.

Bradford, you don't know what you're
missing.

She's a fox.

Wait a minute. That was no fox. It was
in the yearbook.

I guess she matured over the summer.

Yeah.

So did Raina.

I

decided

to get rid of the old family gas
guzzlers once and for all. What about

infamous Bradford family outing? Oh,
well, from now on, we'll form a caravan.

Hey, this is really nice.

Oh, no, no, no. Hands off. This is mine
for the next 24 hours.

Then it's up for grabs.

Dad, aren't you forgetting no joyriding?
Oh, that's right.

Essential trips only.

Oh, of course. Oh, well, yeah, that's
right.

Abby, would you like to go and watch
some submarine races?