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00:00:08,883 --> 00:00:10,093
♪ I'm going down
to South Park ♪
2
00:00:10,093 --> 00:00:11,636
♪ Gonna have
myself a time ♪
3
00:00:11,636 --> 00:00:13,471
all:
♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
4
00:00:13,471 --> 00:00:15,598
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪
5
00:00:15,598 --> 00:00:16,808
♪ Going down
to South Park ♪
6
00:00:16,808 --> 00:00:18,852
♪ Gonna leave my
woes behind ♪
7
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:20,562
♪ Ample parking
day or night ♪
8
00:00:20,562 --> 00:00:22,272
♪ People spouting:
"Howdy neighbor!" ♪
9
00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:23,606
♪ Headed on up
to South Park ♪
10
00:00:23,606 --> 00:00:25,567
♪ Gonna see if
I can't unwind ♪
11
00:00:28,653 --> 00:00:29,988
♪ So come on down
to South Park ♪
12
00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:31,531
♪ And meet some
friends of mine ♪
13
00:00:38,288 --> 00:00:40,540
Hey, Rick!
14
00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:42,167
Oh. Hey, Herb.
15
00:00:42,167 --> 00:00:45,211
So, you know what
this week is, right?
16
00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:47,172
Um, is it Easter?
17
00:00:47,172 --> 00:00:49,883
No, it's my spring break!
18
00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:52,010
No school for seven days!
19
00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:54,304
And guess what?
Go pack your things
20
00:00:54,304 --> 00:00:57,474
because you and I are going
on a big, romantic trip!
21
00:00:57,474 --> 00:00:58,767
Really?
22
00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:00,602
I just came
from the travel agent.
23
00:01:00,602 --> 00:01:02,145
We're gonna spend five nights
24
00:01:02,145 --> 00:01:05,273
in Myrtle Beach,
South Carolina.
25
00:01:06,483 --> 00:01:07,859
Oh.
26
00:01:07,859 --> 00:01:10,737
- Well, what's the matter?
- Myrtle Beach? Really?
27
00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:12,989
We all know what goes on
down there.
28
00:01:12,989 --> 00:01:15,408
I don't do that stuff anymore,
and neither should you.
29
00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:19,037
Rick, I don't wanna
go down there to rage.
30
00:01:19,037 --> 00:01:22,081
I just wanna sit on a beach
with you and watch the sunset.
31
00:01:22,081 --> 00:01:25,001
Yeah, but isn't Myrtle Beach
where those places are?
32
00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:27,754
I don't wanna go into
one of those places.
33
00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:29,506
I don't think they even exist anymore.
34
00:01:29,506 --> 00:01:31,925
Don't you think this is
just what we need, Rick?
35
00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:34,344
You don't even wanna
go into one of those places?
36
00:01:34,344 --> 00:01:35,845
Rick, I'm a little old
for that.
37
00:01:35,845 --> 00:01:38,056
It'd be pretty pathetic
if I did.
38
00:01:38,056 --> 00:01:39,516
Well...
39
00:01:39,516 --> 00:01:41,226
Okay.
- Ohh, Rick!
40
00:01:41,226 --> 00:01:42,852
We're gonna have the best time!
41
00:01:42,852 --> 00:01:44,270
I can't wait to spoil you.
42
00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:45,939
I really do need a vacation.
43
00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:50,109
Oh, we're gonna have the best
spring break of anyone!
44
00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:53,571
All right, guys.
You sure you packed everything?
45
00:01:53,571 --> 00:01:55,198
Yeah, that should be
all of it.
46
00:01:55,198 --> 00:01:57,951
Well, I hope you and Shelley
have a great spring break trip.
47
00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,911
I still feel bad,
us going on a trip
48
00:01:59,911 --> 00:02:01,621
while you and Stan stay home.
49
00:02:01,621 --> 00:02:03,081
You guys have fun
in Santa Fe.
50
00:02:03,081 --> 00:02:05,291
We're gonna do
some dad and son stuff.
51
00:02:05,291 --> 00:02:06,459
Goodbye, Shelley!
52
00:02:06,459 --> 00:02:09,045
Have fun! I'll miss you!
53
00:02:10,046 --> 00:02:12,215
There should be food enough
to last you the week.
54
00:02:12,215 --> 00:02:14,384
Yes, yes, don't worry.
We'll be fine.
55
00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:16,427
- Bye, Stan! Love you!
- Love you, Mom!
56
00:02:16,427 --> 00:02:19,514
- Okay, guys, be safe.
- Bye!
57
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,728
Aww, jeah!
58
00:02:25,728 --> 00:02:28,231
Bitches are gone!
59
00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:31,067
Spring break!
Spring break! Spring break!
60
00:02:31,067 --> 00:02:33,152
This is gonna be
the best spring break ever.
61
00:02:33,152 --> 00:02:35,113
They're gonna be gone
the whole week!
62
00:02:36,364 --> 00:02:38,575
Bro, what are you doing?
63
00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:40,368
I'm painting miniatures.
64
00:02:40,368 --> 00:02:41,953
Painting min--
65
00:02:41,953 --> 00:02:43,580
Dude, do you not understand?
66
00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:45,415
Your mom and Shelley are gone.
67
00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:48,501
We can do whatever we want
without any stupid rules.
68
00:02:48,501 --> 00:02:49,586
Whatever I want?
69
00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:50,670
Yeah, dude!
70
00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:51,963
That's what this is all about.
71
00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:54,090
Let's do some
spring break shit!
72
00:02:54,090 --> 00:02:55,425
Can I see if any of the guys
wanna come over
73
00:02:55,425 --> 00:02:56,926
to do "40k" all week?
74
00:02:56,926 --> 00:02:58,761
Hell, yeah,
let's do some "40k."
75
00:02:58,761 --> 00:02:59,762
What is that?
76
00:02:59,762 --> 00:03:01,306
You don't know
"Warhammer 40k"?
77
00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:03,600
Oh, yeah,
"Warhammer 40k," of course.
78
00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:04,934
I'm down.
Let's do it.
79
00:03:04,934 --> 00:03:06,603
- Really? All week?
- Yeah, dude!
80
00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:07,770
You're old enough.
81
00:03:07,770 --> 00:03:10,106
Sweet! I'm gonna call
Tolkien!
82
00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:20,450
Oh, Rick.
83
00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:23,161
Isn't this nice?
This place is incredible.
84
00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:24,787
Yeah, it's really nice.
85
00:03:24,787 --> 00:03:26,831
I just don't know
if I deserve all this.
86
00:03:26,831 --> 00:03:28,583
You do deserve it, Rick.
87
00:03:28,583 --> 00:03:30,793
You've made me really happy.
88
00:03:30,793 --> 00:03:32,337
Are you almost done?
89
00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:35,298
Yeah, all done.
Here you go.
90
00:03:35,298 --> 00:03:38,134
Oh, Rick.
Look at how happy we are.
91
00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:42,722
Oh, that salt water air
is just so good.
92
00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:44,307
Can't wait to try
some Southern food.
93
00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:46,809
You hungry?
- Yeah, sure. I could eat.
94
00:03:46,809 --> 00:03:48,770
A lot of things are different
here in the South.
95
00:03:48,770 --> 00:03:50,480
Kinda hard to figure out
what's good.
96
00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:51,898
Yeah, all the stores
97
00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:53,566
and restaurants here
aren't like Colorado.
98
00:03:53,566 --> 00:03:55,234
It's almost like
another culture.
99
00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:57,654
Herb?
100
00:03:58,863 --> 00:04:00,239
Herb?
101
00:04:05,453 --> 00:04:07,455
Oh, no.
- Geez.
102
00:04:07,455 --> 00:04:09,040
It's still here.
103
00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:15,380
You said you wouldn't
go into one of these places.
104
00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:17,548
I don't wanna go in.
I just...
105
00:04:17,548 --> 00:04:19,634
can't believe some of these
places are still here.
106
00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:21,844
Whoa! Look who's here!
107
00:04:21,844 --> 00:04:23,763
What are you doing in town?
108
00:04:23,763 --> 00:04:26,015
Oh, I'm just on vacation.
109
00:04:26,015 --> 00:04:27,183
This is Rick.
110
00:04:27,183 --> 00:04:28,643
Well, do you wanna
come inside
111
00:04:28,643 --> 00:04:29,727
and rally a little bit?
112
00:04:29,727 --> 00:04:31,854
Oh, no thanks.
I don't rally anymore.
113
00:04:31,854 --> 00:04:33,731
You sure?
Everyone would love
114
00:04:33,731 --> 00:04:34,941
to rally with you again.
115
00:04:34,941 --> 00:04:36,985
I'm sure.
I don't need to rally.
116
00:04:36,985 --> 00:04:38,861
I'm just here to relax.
Take care.
117
00:04:38,861 --> 00:04:41,155
Well, if you change
your mind, we'll be here!
118
00:04:41,155 --> 00:04:42,615
America number one!
119
00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:44,826
Number one, yep.
120
00:04:44,826 --> 00:04:47,286
Some people, huh? Geez.
121
00:04:50,248 --> 00:04:52,875
Okay, so I'm gonna have
my Retributor Squad
122
00:04:52,875 --> 00:04:54,877
attack your
Stormhawk Interceptor.
123
00:04:54,877 --> 00:04:56,504
Okay, that has
a toughness of 7
124
00:04:56,504 --> 00:04:58,464
and a -1
to your hit rolls.
125
00:05:00,216 --> 00:05:02,218
Okay, so that's
three, four, five hits.
126
00:05:02,218 --> 00:05:04,345
Okay, I'm gonna roll
my saving throw, which is 3+.
127
00:05:04,345 --> 00:05:06,139
What in the actual fuck
128
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:07,724
are you guys doing?
129
00:05:07,724 --> 00:05:09,183
We're playing "40k."
130
00:05:09,183 --> 00:05:12,020
You guys have wasted
another day of spring break
131
00:05:12,020 --> 00:05:14,814
with this stupid shit.
132
00:05:14,814 --> 00:05:17,900
Do you guys know
what spring break is about?
133
00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:20,820
Wet t-shirt contests,
mud wrestling.
134
00:05:20,820 --> 00:05:22,739
Don't you wanna get
some bitches over here?
135
00:05:22,739 --> 00:05:24,824
I thought you were happy
'cause the bitches were gone?
136
00:05:24,824 --> 00:05:26,284
I'm happy
the bitches are gone
137
00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:27,952
so we can have bitches over!
138
00:05:27,952 --> 00:05:30,246
Spring break is dude time.
139
00:05:30,246 --> 00:05:31,914
But you know what,
140
00:05:31,914 --> 00:05:34,042
today's society
has ruined it all.
141
00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:38,921
They've taught you boys
to be ashamed of being boys.
142
00:05:38,921 --> 00:05:43,426
Convinced you that your natural
innate male desires are toxic.
143
00:05:44,677 --> 00:05:46,804
No matter what the liberals
try to tell you, boys,
144
00:05:46,804 --> 00:05:49,348
you shouldn't be ashamed
of your gender.
145
00:05:49,348 --> 00:05:52,101
Okay, Dad. So I've got
an Imperium infantry unit
146
00:05:52,101 --> 00:05:53,311
within six inches
of Celestine,
147
00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:55,063
so they have a +6 save.
148
00:05:56,230 --> 00:05:57,607
My God.
149
00:05:57,607 --> 00:06:00,401
What are we going to do?
150
00:06:07,909 --> 00:06:09,786
I'm going to sleep.
151
00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:11,454
I'm gonna go to sleep now.
152
00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:13,790
♪ I feel so alone ♪
153
00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:16,667
Here I go... to sleep.
154
00:06:19,337 --> 00:06:20,880
Rick?
155
00:06:27,929 --> 00:06:30,306
♪ Go, look at me ♪
156
00:06:31,808 --> 00:06:33,851
♪ I feel so alone ♪
157
00:06:36,813 --> 00:06:38,022
♪ Come on ♪
158
00:06:40,650 --> 00:06:43,152
♪ Move with me ♪
159
00:06:43,152 --> 00:06:44,695
♪ Look at me ♪
160
00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:50,076
♪ I feel so alone ♪
161
00:06:52,787 --> 00:06:54,038
♪ Come on ♪
162
00:06:56,499 --> 00:06:59,168
Can I help you
find any--oh, my God!
163
00:06:59,168 --> 00:07:00,336
Sir, you're back!
164
00:07:00,336 --> 00:07:02,004
Yeah, just browsing.
165
00:07:02,004 --> 00:07:04,340
You guys, it's him!
He's here!
166
00:07:04,340 --> 00:07:05,466
- Oh, wow, it is him!
- It's him?
167
00:07:06,592 --> 00:07:07,844
Is that really you?
168
00:07:07,844 --> 00:07:09,220
What are you doing here?
169
00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:10,763
Could I get
a selfie with you?
170
00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:12,723
Hey, uh, since you're here,
171
00:07:12,723 --> 00:07:14,100
you wanna rally a little bit?
172
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,852
No, no. I can't rally
173
00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:18,271
I've got a serious boyfriend.
I'm just looking around.
174
00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:20,398
Oh, come on. When are you
gonna be here again?
175
00:07:20,398 --> 00:07:21,566
Live a little!
176
00:07:21,566 --> 00:07:24,026
Well, maybe I could do
just a little bit.
177
00:07:24,026 --> 00:07:25,862
I mean, wha--
178
00:07:25,862 --> 00:07:28,865
What the hell is up
with all these Mexicans? Huh?
179
00:07:30,533 --> 00:07:33,119
Yeah! I mean--I mean,
Joe Biden obviously thinks
180
00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:34,954
immigrants are made of gold
or something.
181
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:37,206
Piece of shit!
182
00:07:37,206 --> 00:07:39,584
Yeah! Yeah!
183
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:46,924
Hey, Steven.
You know your son's
184
00:07:46,924 --> 00:07:48,759
been over at my house
for spring break?
185
00:07:48,759 --> 00:07:50,553
Yeah, of course I know.
186
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:53,055
Well, you should see
what they're doing,
187
00:07:53,055 --> 00:07:55,892
'cause it's a little hrrrp.
188
00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:57,393
Well--well,
what are they doing?
189
00:07:57,393 --> 00:07:59,937
Look, I just think
we better talk with our boys
190
00:07:59,937 --> 00:08:02,398
to counteract all the ways
in which society
191
00:08:02,398 --> 00:08:05,193
has been pathologizing masculinity.
192
00:08:05,193 --> 00:08:07,570
I mean, you went balls-out
on spring break, right?
193
00:08:07,570 --> 00:08:10,281
Tried to see chicks' boobs
and stuff?
194
00:08:10,281 --> 00:08:12,325
Mm, no I didn't.
195
00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:14,410
Well, no, I mean,
you weren't ashamed
196
00:08:14,410 --> 00:08:15,995
of being a guy, right?
197
00:08:15,995 --> 00:08:17,246
Like, you went out to the lake
198
00:08:17,246 --> 00:08:19,582
and tried to play grab ass
with girls, right?
199
00:08:19,582 --> 00:08:22,501
No, I did not.
200
00:08:22,501 --> 00:08:25,087
Why--why are you saying that?
201
00:08:25,087 --> 00:08:27,924
Why are you making
those words with your mouth?
202
00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:30,301
Oh, hey, Randy.
Everything okay with the boys?
203
00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:32,386
Ohh, right.
204
00:08:32,386 --> 00:08:34,472
Sorry--sorry, yeah,
everything's great.
205
00:08:34,472 --> 00:08:37,183
They're playing a little
table miniatures game.
206
00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:39,352
It's great.
207
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:41,812
Just, uh, came to let you know
they're good.
208
00:08:41,812 --> 00:08:42,939
Don't worry.
209
00:08:42,939 --> 00:08:44,982
I'm gonna take care of it.
210
00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:47,777
I'll tell you what else.
211
00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:49,820
This whole situation
in the Ukraine,
212
00:08:49,820 --> 00:08:51,572
that wouldn't be happening
on my watch.
213
00:08:53,032 --> 00:08:56,410
The problem is now we all have
a president who's afraid.
214
00:08:56,410 --> 00:08:59,497
And that's why Joe and the ho
have got to go!
215
00:09:00,831 --> 00:09:02,667
And I'll tell you
another thing.
216
00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:04,460
It's--oh, hang on a second.
217
00:09:06,045 --> 00:09:07,213
Oh, crap.
218
00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,631
Ho--hold on a second, everybody.
219
00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:10,800
Uh--
220
00:09:13,010 --> 00:09:14,971
Oh, hey, Rick!
221
00:09:14,971 --> 00:09:16,180
Where are you?
222
00:09:16,180 --> 00:09:17,557
I couldn't sleep, Rick.
223
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:18,891
I was just tossing and turning
224
00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:20,142
and I didn't wanna wake you up,
225
00:09:20,142 --> 00:09:22,645
so I decided to come out
and buy some sunscreen
226
00:09:22,645 --> 00:09:24,313
and stuff
for our beach day tomorrow.
227
00:09:24,313 --> 00:09:26,023
Oh, okay.
228
00:09:26,023 --> 00:09:28,567
I got scared
that you were out rallying.
229
00:09:28,567 --> 00:09:30,861
Ohh, geez,
well, that's silly.
230
00:09:30,861 --> 00:09:33,072
Last thing I wanna do
is rally.
231
00:09:33,072 --> 00:09:34,532
Listen up--
get back to sleep, Rick.
232
00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:35,950
I'll--I'll be right home, okay?
233
00:09:35,950 --> 00:09:38,536
Okay. Sorry for panicking. Bye.
234
00:09:38,536 --> 00:09:40,329
Bye-bye.
235
00:09:40,329 --> 00:09:41,789
Okay, uh, nice to meet you, everybody.
236
00:09:41,789 --> 00:09:43,165
I need to get going.
237
00:09:43,165 --> 00:09:44,959
Oh, come on. Just rally
with us a little bit more.
238
00:09:44,959 --> 00:09:46,252
No, I really can't.
239
00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:48,254
Just a few more minutes.
Come on!
240
00:09:49,338 --> 00:09:52,174
All right, I guess I can
rally just a little bit longer.
241
00:09:52,174 --> 00:09:54,051
I mean, after all,
I am here for you.
242
00:09:54,051 --> 00:09:56,345
I am your warrior!
243
00:09:56,345 --> 00:09:57,763
Liberal left!
244
00:09:57,763 --> 00:09:59,473
Hunter Biden laptop!
245
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:03,311
Yeah! Yeah!
246
00:10:15,197 --> 00:10:16,532
Uh--
247
00:10:16,532 --> 00:10:18,868
Ugh. Oh, geez.
248
00:10:18,868 --> 00:10:20,828
Herb?
Herb, you gotta get up.
249
00:10:20,828 --> 00:10:22,872
We're gonna miss
our whole beach day.
250
00:10:22,872 --> 00:10:25,875
Oh, it's--it's just
the time change, Rick.
251
00:10:25,875 --> 00:10:27,043
You enjoy the beach.
252
00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:29,587
I just gotta sleep
a little longer.
253
00:10:29,587 --> 00:10:31,088
Okay.
254
00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:50,941
Dude, it's so awesome
being able
255
00:10:50,941 --> 00:10:52,234
to leave "Warhammer"
set up all night
256
00:10:52,234 --> 00:10:53,361
and come back to it
in the morning.
257
00:10:53,361 --> 00:10:55,363
I know, it's great.
258
00:10:55,363 --> 00:10:58,240
Hey, hey, you guys.
What did you do?
259
00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:00,242
- What do you mean?
- I mean the cops are here.
260
00:11:00,242 --> 00:11:01,827
What did you guys do?
261
00:11:03,037 --> 00:11:05,498
We're just continuing our
game of "40k" from last night.
262
00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:06,916
Okay, you guys,
just stop
263
00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:09,085
'cause the police wanna ask you
some questions.
264
00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:10,419
Come on in, officers.
265
00:11:10,419 --> 00:11:12,588
Hello, gentlemen.
266
00:11:12,588 --> 00:11:13,756
Hands up.
267
00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:16,175
We heard somebody in here's
been bad.
268
00:11:16,175 --> 00:11:18,844
Oh, no, guys. Looks like
you're in big trouble.
269
00:11:18,844 --> 00:11:20,638
You better read 'em
their rights.
270
00:11:20,638 --> 00:11:22,306
Hey, whoa, whoa!
Don't touch the models.
271
00:11:22,306 --> 00:11:23,599
We spent a long time on this.
272
00:11:23,599 --> 00:11:25,017
Stan, stop with that shit.
273
00:11:25,017 --> 00:11:26,185
Come on, get into it.
274
00:11:26,185 --> 00:11:28,354
Wet t-shirt contest!
275
00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:30,106
Hey, what the fuck?
276
00:11:30,106 --> 00:11:32,400
- What?
- Hey, you fuck guy!
277
00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:34,151
You do not harass the ladies!
278
00:11:34,151 --> 00:11:36,445
Well, I wanted strippers,
not prudes.
279
00:11:36,445 --> 00:11:38,739
You wanna talk, big man? Huh?
280
00:11:38,739 --> 00:11:40,366
You wanna be big man?
281
00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:41,742
Whoa, whoa, okay. I--
282
00:11:41,742 --> 00:11:44,328
I think I need to explain
something to you, okay?
283
00:11:44,328 --> 00:11:46,622
Look, I'm just trying to combat
the messages
284
00:11:46,622 --> 00:11:48,624
that the liberal left
is putting out to young men
285
00:11:48,624 --> 00:11:51,460
about their male instincts
being toxic.
286
00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:52,837
The fuck you talking?
287
00:11:52,837 --> 00:11:54,463
You know,
I'm trying to show my son
288
00:11:54,463 --> 00:11:56,507
and his nerdy little friend
what a real party is
289
00:11:56,507 --> 00:11:58,551
'cause society wants them
to be ashamed
290
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,678
of their masculine natures.
291
00:12:00,678 --> 00:12:03,097
- You want real party?
- Yeah!
292
00:12:03,097 --> 00:12:05,558
Truth is, I got a whole barn
full of weed.
293
00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:08,811
I will call some friends.
294
00:12:15,192 --> 00:12:16,652
The person you are
trying to reach
295
00:12:16,652 --> 00:12:18,154
cannot be located.
296
00:12:18,154 --> 00:12:20,448
Please leave a message.
297
00:12:20,448 --> 00:12:21,699
Where are you?
298
00:12:21,699 --> 00:12:23,742
I got back from the beach
and you were gone.
299
00:12:23,742 --> 00:12:25,244
Please pick up.
300
00:12:39,383 --> 00:12:42,094
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
301
00:12:46,390 --> 00:12:48,350
And we're gonna take Georgia,
302
00:12:48,350 --> 00:12:51,061
and--and we're gonna
take Arizona this time!
303
00:12:52,521 --> 00:12:55,191
And when I say we're gonna take
Arizona in the election,
304
00:12:55,191 --> 00:12:56,734
I--I mean we're gonna
take it again.
305
00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:59,069
'cause we all know
I won it last time, too!
306
00:12:59,069 --> 00:13:03,365
Oh. Hey, everybody.
307
00:13:03,365 --> 00:13:04,742
This is Rick.
308
00:13:08,954 --> 00:13:11,373
Rick! Rick,
will you just wait!
309
00:13:12,124 --> 00:13:13,751
You know it's 2:00
in the morning?
310
00:13:13,751 --> 00:13:16,545
I was alone at the hotel
while you were out rallying!
311
00:13:16,545 --> 00:13:19,215
I just wanted to rally
for a little bit.
312
00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:21,675
Yeah, you really look like
you just rallied a little bit.
313
00:13:21,675 --> 00:13:24,053
I got a text
that Tucker was in town,
314
00:13:24,053 --> 00:13:26,514
and I just wanted to go rally
for a little bit.
315
00:13:26,514 --> 00:13:29,016
You really think those people
care about you, Herb?
316
00:13:29,016 --> 00:13:31,769
They don't.
They just wanna do that.
317
00:13:31,769 --> 00:13:34,563
Rick, I got it
out of my system now.
318
00:13:34,563 --> 00:13:36,232
We can still have
a great vacation.
319
00:13:36,232 --> 00:13:37,900
Let's just start over tomorrow.
320
00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:39,610
Okay?
321
00:13:48,702 --> 00:13:51,330
Right, all right,
let's do this!
322
00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:52,373
Okay, you ready?
323
00:13:52,373 --> 00:13:54,917
Three, two, one. Go!
324
00:13:54,917 --> 00:13:57,253
Check it out, guys!
325
00:13:58,629 --> 00:14:00,297
Ahh!
326
00:14:00,297 --> 00:14:01,590
Huh? Whoa!
327
00:14:05,427 --> 00:14:07,263
Sir, do you think
you can walk?
328
00:14:07,263 --> 00:14:09,098
No, I don't think so.
329
00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:11,433
Sir, we think you've had
too much to drink,
330
00:14:11,433 --> 00:14:13,269
and we should probably
take you to the hospital.
331
00:14:13,269 --> 00:14:15,312
No, I can't.
I have to stay here
332
00:14:15,312 --> 00:14:17,022
'cause I'm in charge
of my son.
333
00:14:17,022 --> 00:14:19,483
Today's woke culture
has vilified his manhood
334
00:14:19,483 --> 00:14:21,193
and made him ashamed
of himself.
335
00:14:21,193 --> 00:14:23,904
Okay, sir, but it appears
you have a broken arm
336
00:14:23,904 --> 00:14:25,447
and several fractured ribs.
337
00:14:25,447 --> 00:14:27,074
Yeah, but I can't leave
338
00:14:27,074 --> 00:14:29,618
because my son's natural
instincts are being suppressed
339
00:14:29,618 --> 00:14:31,704
and it's leading
to behavioral problems.
340
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:33,289
You see the shit he's doing?
341
00:14:33,289 --> 00:14:35,958
He's over there
playing with dolls.
342
00:14:43,215 --> 00:14:45,342
It's pretty good fondue, right?
343
00:14:46,760 --> 00:14:48,721
We should probably
just go back to the hotel.
344
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:50,723
You've got the shakes
from rallying all night.
345
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:53,350
No, no, Rick.
This is our vacation.
346
00:14:53,350 --> 00:14:54,977
I want us to have a nice
347
00:14:54,977 --> 00:14:56,812
romantic lunch.
348
00:14:56,812 --> 00:14:59,064
Maybe we should
just go back to Colorado.
349
00:14:59,064 --> 00:15:02,026
No, Rick.
I'm gonna make this up to you.
350
00:15:02,026 --> 00:15:03,611
I don't wanna rally anymore.
351
00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:05,154
There's just a lot of people
out there
352
00:15:05,154 --> 00:15:07,156
who won't let it go, you know?
353
00:15:07,156 --> 00:15:08,824
Yes, and you can't
be around them.
354
00:15:08,824 --> 00:15:10,826
I know, I know.
355
00:15:10,826 --> 00:15:12,244
Let me just--
356
00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:14,997
Let me just go throw up
because I'll feel much better.
357
00:15:14,997 --> 00:15:17,166
Okay, go throw up, Herb.
358
00:15:28,469 --> 00:15:29,553
Oh, God.
359
00:15:29,553 --> 00:15:31,764
Come on, just stop. Stop.
360
00:15:31,764 --> 00:15:33,349
The country is fine.
361
00:15:33,349 --> 00:15:35,017
You have better things to do.
362
00:15:55,663 --> 00:15:58,874
Yeah, oh yeah!
That's it! Yeah!
363
00:15:58,874 --> 00:16:01,293
We're gonna get abortion rights
thrown the hell out
364
00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:04,338
so those dirty lesbians
can't keep having abortions!
365
00:16:04,338 --> 00:16:06,131
Yeah! Oh, yeah, man!
366
00:16:06,131 --> 00:16:08,592
We're gonna get those Black
Lives Matter protestors
367
00:16:08,592 --> 00:16:10,469
off the streets
with a fire hose!
368
00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:12,721
Yeah, America!
both: Yeah!
369
00:16:12,721 --> 00:16:13,889
Rick!
370
00:16:13,889 --> 00:16:15,849
Fuck you.
371
00:16:17,768 --> 00:16:19,436
Well, to hell with you!
372
00:16:19,436 --> 00:16:21,063
Nobody controls me!
373
00:16:21,063 --> 00:16:24,274
- Yeah!
- Yeah! America! Yeah!
374
00:16:37,705 --> 00:16:39,373
Can I help you?
375
00:16:39,373 --> 00:16:41,083
We've had some complaints
about a party
376
00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:43,001
that's been going on
for three days here.
377
00:16:43,001 --> 00:16:44,420
Hey, what's going on?
378
00:16:46,046 --> 00:16:48,424
All right, guys,
who ordered the stripper?
379
00:16:48,424 --> 00:16:50,551
Can we come in
and look around, sir?
380
00:16:50,551 --> 00:16:52,594
Oh, yeah! Come on in.
381
00:16:52,594 --> 00:16:54,596
Honk honk!
382
00:16:54,596 --> 00:16:55,973
All right,
get down on the ground!
383
00:16:55,973 --> 00:16:58,016
Whoa, whoa! No, no, no.
It's okay.
384
00:16:58,016 --> 00:16:59,309
I'm just helping my boy
385
00:16:59,309 --> 00:17:00,978
through the media assault
on manliness.
386
00:17:00,978 --> 00:17:04,189
Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!
387
00:17:04,189 --> 00:17:05,774
I need to see some ID, sir.
388
00:17:05,774 --> 00:17:08,777
Uh! Okay!
Okay, Stan! Stan!
389
00:17:08,777 --> 00:17:10,696
Yeah?
390
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:13,115
Can you get my wallet
from the upstairs?
391
00:17:13,115 --> 00:17:15,284
Yeah, soon as we're done
with this psyker phase.
392
00:17:15,284 --> 00:17:16,702
I have five psyker units.
393
00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:19,038
Oh, my God.
This is so embarrassing.
394
00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:23,167
Hey! Freeze!
You, right there!
395
00:17:23,167 --> 00:17:26,295
That's Alonzo Fineski,
the Romanian sex trafficker!
396
00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:27,713
Fuck you, big man!
397
00:17:30,466 --> 00:17:32,176
Ahh! Oh, my God!
398
00:17:32,176 --> 00:17:34,011
Ahh!
399
00:17:37,097 --> 00:17:39,975
Stan? Stan?
400
00:17:48,776 --> 00:17:50,694
And now,
ladies and gentlemen,
401
00:17:50,694 --> 00:17:52,613
here he is,
402
00:17:52,613 --> 00:17:54,990
the once and future president
403
00:17:54,990 --> 00:17:56,992
of the United States
of America!
404
00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:06,460
Thank you.
I am here today
405
00:18:06,460 --> 00:18:08,712
for those who have
been wronged.
406
00:18:10,214 --> 00:18:13,425
For those who have been betrayed.
407
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:15,719
And let me tell you
408
00:18:15,719 --> 00:18:19,681
that nobody in this country
has been betrayed more
409
00:18:19,681 --> 00:18:21,975
than my Ricky Rick.
410
00:18:21,975 --> 00:18:23,936
Huh? What?
411
00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:27,523
Rick, I am so sorry.
412
00:18:27,523 --> 00:18:29,358
And if you are out there,
413
00:18:29,358 --> 00:18:32,194
I want you to know
that I love you.
414
00:18:32,194 --> 00:18:34,279
You are the only thing
that keeps me from doing
415
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:36,740
all this stupid stuff.
416
00:18:36,740 --> 00:18:39,701
When I met you,
I felt in control of myself
417
00:18:39,701 --> 00:18:41,620
for the first time.
418
00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:45,415
There has never been anyone
who calmed me down more
419
00:18:45,415 --> 00:18:48,544
than my little Ricky Bear.
420
00:18:48,544 --> 00:18:50,587
You are my boo.
421
00:18:50,587 --> 00:18:54,591
Did he just say
that Rick is his boo?
422
00:18:54,591 --> 00:18:58,720
The truth is, some of us
simply can't be alone.
423
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:03,725
We need a relationship so that
we're accountable to someone.
424
00:19:03,725 --> 00:19:06,812
I realize now
how broken I am
425
00:19:06,812 --> 00:19:11,400
without that person who keeps
me from destroying myself.
426
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:12,901
Sh-Sharon?
427
00:19:12,901 --> 00:19:16,613
And all I've ever done
was take you for granted
428
00:19:16,613 --> 00:19:19,324
and wished I wasn't
being controlled.
429
00:19:19,324 --> 00:19:22,286
Hi, Sharon.
430
00:19:22,286 --> 00:19:25,414
Will you please come home?
431
00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:29,001
Rick, I am a giant
piece of shit without you.
432
00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:31,587
I don't deserve
another chance.
433
00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:33,297
You have been wronged.
434
00:19:33,297 --> 00:19:35,757
You have been betrayed.
435
00:19:35,757 --> 00:19:40,929
And the only person
who deserves retribution is me.
436
00:19:41,889 --> 00:19:46,101
I know you all really want
to rally and rage, but...
437
00:19:46,101 --> 00:19:49,271
the only thing
I have to say is...
438
00:19:49,271 --> 00:19:53,400
is that I love Rick.
439
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:58,238
I love Rick!
I love Rick!
440
00:19:58,238 --> 00:20:02,367
I love Rick.
441
00:20:02,367 --> 00:20:06,997
I love Rick!
I love Rick!
442
00:20:06,997 --> 00:20:10,876
I love Rick!
- I love you, Rick!
443
00:20:10,876 --> 00:20:14,004
all: I love Rick!
I love Rick!
444
00:20:14,004 --> 00:20:16,131
I love Rick!
- Yeah!
445
00:20:16,131 --> 00:20:18,759
all: I love Rick!
446
00:20:18,759 --> 00:20:20,969
I love Rick!
I love Rick!
447
00:20:20,969 --> 00:20:23,805
I love Rick! I love Rick!
448
00:20:23,805 --> 00:20:25,015
I love Rick!
449
00:20:25,015 --> 00:20:26,934
Oh, crap.
Here we go again!
450
00:20:26,934 --> 00:20:28,685
all: I love Rick!
I love Rick!
451
00:20:28,685 --> 00:20:29,853
I love--
452
00:20:43,075 --> 00:20:45,118
It's okay, Randy.
We're back.
453
00:20:45,118 --> 00:20:49,039
I'm sorry
I cut your trip short.
454
00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:50,707
It's okay, Randy.
455
00:20:50,707 --> 00:20:53,126
You made it longer
than last spring break.
456
00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:00,884
- Oh. Hey, Mom.
- Stanley,
457
00:21:00,884 --> 00:21:02,552
what have I told you
about playing "Warhammer"
458
00:21:02,552 --> 00:21:05,138
on the kitchen table?
- Aw!
459
00:21:21,613 --> 00:21:23,573
Oh, Rick!
460
00:21:26,243 --> 00:21:28,912
I don't wanna go
through all that again.
461
00:21:28,912 --> 00:21:32,290
I just wanna stay
in South Park with you.
462
00:21:32,290 --> 00:21:36,169
Well, I guess we'll just
have to see what happens.
30810
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