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1
00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:16,960
- I'm alive.
- Oh!
2
00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:19,960
Ha-ha. Phew.
MILLIE CHUCKLES
3
00:00:19,960 --> 00:00:21,960
Hm-hm.
4
00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:24,960
So, er...
CLEARS THROAT
5
00:00:24,960 --> 00:00:26,960
Millie, erm, how was your night off?
6
00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:31,960
Get up to anything fun
with anyone boyfriend-y or...?
7
00:00:31,960 --> 00:00:33,960
I'm not seeing anyone.
No?
8
00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:35,960
Unless you count
the crow that lives in my wall.
9
00:00:35,960 --> 00:00:39,960
No, no, I drank a whole can
of Thunder Piss energy drink at 6pm
10
00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:42,960
and decided to come here
and alphabetise the dips.
11
00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:45,640
Aioli to tzatziki.
12
00:00:45,640 --> 00:00:46,960
Yeah.
13
00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:48,960
Although,
I think tzatziki begins with a T.
14
00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:49,960
What?
15
00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:53,960
I mean, I could help you alphabetise
the dips tonight, maybe?
16
00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:55,160
I'd like that.
You'd like that?
17
00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:56,960
Yeah.
Great!
18
00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:57,960
HE LAUGHS
19
00:00:57,960 --> 00:00:59,960
That would be fanta...
That would... Not exa...
20
00:00:59,960 --> 00:01:01,960
Not great, just good... actually.
Oh.
21
00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:07,960
Soooo... how was your night off?
22
00:01:07,960 --> 00:01:09,960
Pfft. Big night.
23
00:01:09,960 --> 00:01:11,960
Really?
Yeah, it was. Dancing, actually.
24
00:01:11,960 --> 00:01:13,960
Working on some moves,
25
00:01:13,960 --> 00:01:16,640
adjusting those moves
in order to maximise performance.
26
00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:17,960
It's important to stay
on top of your game
27
00:01:17,960 --> 00:01:19,160
when it comes to these things.
28
00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:20,320
I'd love to go dancing.
29
00:01:20,320 --> 00:01:21,960
Must be amazing to have
people to go with.
30
00:01:21,960 --> 00:01:24,960
Yeah, big time. Big time.
31
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:26,960
Although this was actually
just me by myself at home
32
00:01:26,960 --> 00:01:28,960
in front of the mirror.
Oh.
33
00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:30,480
Teaching myself the robot,
34
00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:34,960
just in case, er, I do ever
venture out for a night out.
35
00:01:34,960 --> 00:01:35,960
CHUCKLES
36
00:01:35,960 --> 00:01:37,480
Let me see if I can remember it,
actually.
37
00:01:37,480 --> 00:01:40,960
It was, er, left arm up,
right arm up,
38
00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:43,960
twizzle both 90 degrees,
pop a shoulder if there's time,
39
00:01:43,960 --> 00:01:46,480
point, point, point, point, point,
cheeky little wink,
40
00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:47,960
er, and repeat.
41
00:01:47,960 --> 00:01:50,960
Wow. I'd love to see it sometime.
42
00:01:51,960 --> 00:01:56,960
Listen, erm, I was thinking,
well, you're a woman, and...
43
00:01:56,960 --> 00:01:58,960
Yes.
..I'm a man.
44
00:01:58,960 --> 00:01:59,960
DOOR OPENS
45
00:01:59,960 --> 00:02:01,960
Trust me,
I've made that mistake before.
46
00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:02,960
Give it a few years.
47
00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:05,640
Sorry I'm late, everybody.
I was on a date.
48
00:02:05,640 --> 00:02:07,960
Wowza.
Keep it in your pants, Millie.
49
00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:09,960
And you couldn't have got changed
before work?
50
00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:12,640
I'm transgender, Thomas.
How much more change do you want?
51
00:02:12,640 --> 00:02:14,960
You want my advice
for landing a man?
52
00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:16,960
It all starts by swiping right.
53
00:02:16,960 --> 00:02:17,960
Unless he's a southpaw.
54
00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:20,320
Then you swipe left,
upper cut to the chin,
55
00:02:20,320 --> 00:02:23,960
turning kick to the knee,
and he's out for the count.
56
00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:26,960
Thank you, Beefy,
but I did not put in all this effort
57
00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:28,960
to land one man
for the rest of my life.
58
00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:31,960
I did it because they might be
bringing back national service.
59
00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:33,960
Either way,
if I'm gonna end up with one person,
60
00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:35,320
I need them to be
my intellectual match.
61
00:02:35,320 --> 00:02:37,640
Oh, when's the wedding?
What wedding?
62
00:02:37,640 --> 00:02:38,960
To the sound of your own voice.
63
00:02:38,960 --> 00:02:40,960
Sit down. Join the circle.
64
00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:44,960
So, what's all this, then?
Oh, wait, no, let me guess.
65
00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:47,000
Erm, speed dating for ugly people.
66
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,480
I really hope it's Squid Games!
67
00:02:49,480 --> 00:02:51,960
Not for the murder.
I'm just in it for the cookies.
68
00:02:51,960 --> 00:02:53,960
All I know is I came in this evening
69
00:02:53,960 --> 00:02:56,160
and Simon had locked himself
in his office,
70
00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:57,960
jabbering on
about taking back control.
71
00:02:59,960 --> 00:03:01,960
I'm no psychiatrist,
but I think this divorce
72
00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:03,960
has really pushed him over the edge.
73
00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:08,960
'Your lack of
faith is duly noted, employee 8402.'
74
00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:10,960
Where are these numbers coming from?
There's literally five of us.
75
00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:13,960
'You are looking at the future
of Pellocks.
76
00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:18,960
'The boxes before you contain the
latest customer-facing AI technology
77
00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:20,960
'that...
that Pellocks could afford.'
78
00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:23,800
Wow. I had no idea
there was an East Korea.
79
00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:25,960
We will no longer be relying
on human connection,
80
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:30,160
only to have it smashed back in
our face like a custard pie of lies.
81
00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:32,320
'Shouldn't that be "custody" pie?'
82
00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:34,960
His wife's taken the kids.
Lovely bit of wordplay.
83
00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:38,960
'Employee 6478,
open the box in front of you.'
84
00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:40,640
That's me.
85
00:03:43,960 --> 00:03:44,960
Ooh.
86
00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:47,960
"The V-Scan staff headset
allows retail staff
87
00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:50,960
"the hands-free ability
to scan stock items,
88
00:03:50,960 --> 00:03:52,960
"alerting them at a glance
to which products are out of date
89
00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:53,960
"and in need of disposal."
90
00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:57,960
I've seen these. They are amazing.
Type in "VR porn". Yeah.
91
00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,960
All of the sights,
none of the smells.
92
00:03:59,960 --> 00:04:01,960
It's a game-changer, people.
It really is.
93
00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:02,960
Here we go.
94
00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:07,960
'V-Scan uses machine learning to
speed up the stock-taking process,
95
00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:09,320
'eliminating the need for employees
96
00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:13,960
'to waste time communicating
during their shifts.'
97
00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:15,960
BEEPING,
CHIMING
98
00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:18,960
Hang on, guys,
let's think about this for a second.
99
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:21,960
Is this really
what we wanna be doing?
100
00:04:21,960 --> 00:04:23,000
Giving ourselves over
to the machines?
101
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,960
What happened to a time when AI
102
00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:27,960
was just the sound of a Scottish
person agreeing with you twice?
103
00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:29,960
Tom, it's a bit of plastic.
104
00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:32,960
Call me a sceptic, but I'll believe
the machines are listening
105
00:04:32,960 --> 00:04:34,960
when I stop receiving emails
for penis enlargement spam.
106
00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:39,960
'Employee 1610,
designation "Beefy".'
107
00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:41,960
You will be testing
the Bluetooth range
108
00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:44,960
for the brand-new
anti-theft geo-tagged trolleys.
109
00:04:44,960 --> 00:04:47,960
'You need to get as far away
from the store as possible
110
00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:48,960
'so we can judge how far they...
111
00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:52,000
'1610?
112
00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:54,960
'Beefy?'
She's off.
113
00:04:55,960 --> 00:04:57,800
'OK.
114
00:04:57,800 --> 00:05:01,000
'Employee 8402,
you are going to be the voice
115
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:03,960
'of Pellocks' brand-new
self-service scanners.
116
00:05:03,960 --> 00:05:05,960
'The modern customer
loves nothing more
117
00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:08,960
'than arguing with a machine
at checkout.'
118
00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:12,960
Your voice will give it that
much-needed sense of spinelessness
119
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:15,960
that make people feel superior.
120
00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:17,160
CACKLES
121
00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:20,160
And if I refuse to hand over
my identity to a machine?
122
00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:22,960
Record the phrases, 8402!
123
00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:27,960
And try to add
a little bit of... flavour.
124
00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:30,960
Sorry, if you want a strong flavour,
you come for blue cheese,
125
00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:32,960
not, you know, Babybel wax.
126
00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:33,960
Sorry, Thomas.
127
00:05:33,960 --> 00:05:36,960
I'll do it.
I could do a celebrity voice.
128
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:38,960
"Ah, please place the item
129
00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:41,800
"inside the, ah, the bagging area."
130
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:42,960
Jeff Goldblum.
131
00:05:43,960 --> 00:05:45,160
I know!
That is good.
132
00:05:45,160 --> 00:05:49,480
'Ah, yes, employee 666.'
Clever.
133
00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:51,960
'For you, I have
an alternative surprise.
134
00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:53,960
'Open the box in front of you.'
135
00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:01,960
I feel like there's a hate crime
in here I'm not seeing.
136
00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:04,960
The average idiot customer
cannot tell the difference
137
00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:10,960
between a "display-by" date
and a "best-by" date.
138
00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:12,960
CHUCKLES
139
00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:15,960
As supermarkets, we are encouraged
to donate to foodbanks
140
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:18,960
anything we can no longer
legally display.
141
00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:22,960
However, since Pellocks
is graciously raising money
142
00:06:22,960 --> 00:06:25,960
for your gender reassignment
surgery,
143
00:06:25,960 --> 00:06:29,960
we are going to turn
these un-displayable products
144
00:06:29,960 --> 00:06:34,960
into free giveaways
to incentivise donations.
145
00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:36,960
SIMON CACKLES
146
00:06:36,960 --> 00:06:38,960
Don't stare too long,
you might fall in love.
147
00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:40,640
The sooner you learn
to love yourself,
148
00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:42,640
the sooner you'll get over
this crush on Millie.
149
00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:44,320
Shut up, you dick!
150
00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:45,960
Shush!
151
00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:51,960
Maybe I do like Millie, OK?
152
00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:53,960
Maybe it won't go anywhere.
What's she doing?
153
00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:56,960
Whoa.
At least I'm willing to try.
154
00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:59,480
You couldn't handle a relationship
with another human being
155
00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:01,960
cos you could never love anyone
as much as you love yourself.
156
00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:04,960
Oh.
157
00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:09,960
Oh. Mm.
158
00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:19,960
According to this headset, these
dogs are dangerously out of date.
159
00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:23,480
'Millie, go through the batch, and
immediately throw out the bad ones.
160
00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:27,960
'Olivia, start programming the
scanner, and don't do a silly voice.
161
00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:29,960
'That is all.
162
00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:34,160
'Yeah, can I order
one Bombay potato,
163
00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:37,960
'one spinach paneer,
two pilau rice, and one pasanda?'
164
00:07:37,960 --> 00:07:40,960
Let go of the button!
165
00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:56,960
Millie, you've been doing this
for hours, so...
166
00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:59,960
listen, I was thinking,
maybe we could take a break?
167
00:07:59,960 --> 00:08:02,640
You and me together?
No need. This thing is amazing.
168
00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:05,000
AI is literally teaching itself
to go faster.
169
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:07,960
All I have to do is look at a jar,
and the headset has taught itself
170
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:09,960
to recognise bad ones
just by the picture.
171
00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:13,960
You know, speaking of things that
are right in front of your face
172
00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:16,800
and should have been said
a long time ago,
173
00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:20,640
erm, well, I was... I was wondering
what you're doing tonight?
174
00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:22,960
I was thinking perhaps
you could pop over to mine
175
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:25,960
and, I don't know, I could go over
some more of my dance moves for you?
176
00:08:25,960 --> 00:08:28,960
Yeah, yeah. You go on without me.
Oh.
177
00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,960
Go on without me.
178
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:32,960
Yeah, OK, yeah, sure, I...
179
00:08:34,480 --> 00:08:36,000
..I-I'll print you out a PDF.
180
00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:39,480
Easier to follow.
Mm-hm.
181
00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:40,800
SIGHS
182
00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:48,960
OK, then.
183
00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:51,960
I'll just...
184
00:08:56,960 --> 00:08:59,960
Remove. Remove. Remove.
185
00:08:59,960 --> 00:09:01,960
Remove. Remove. Remove. Remove.
186
00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:11,960
Remove.
187
00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:16,960
Remove. Remove. Remove. Remove!
188
00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:20,960
"Thank you
for shopping at Pellocks."
189
00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:22,960
'Thank you
for shopping at Pellocks.'
190
00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:24,960
BEEP
Great, last one.
191
00:09:25,960 --> 00:09:27,960
Three hours of my life!
192
00:09:27,960 --> 00:09:29,960
I could have been getting
wined, dined and reclined.
193
00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:34,960
SIGHS
'Is there a problem?'
194
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:38,000
Do you know what? Yeah.
195
00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:40,960
Yeah, there is a problem.
What if Thomas is right?
196
00:09:40,960 --> 00:09:43,960
What if I'm never gonna meet a man
I've got anything in common with
197
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:46,960
other than the ability
to urinate standing up?
198
00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:48,000
'Would you like more time?'
199
00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:50,000
That's exactly what I need,
is more time
200
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,960
if I'm ever gonna find
the perfect man.
201
00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:52,960
'I hope you come again.'
202
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:54,960
You and me both.
203
00:09:54,960 --> 00:09:57,960
'Can I help you find
what you're looking for?
204
00:10:00,960 --> 00:10:03,640
'Please touch to continue.'
205
00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:11,960
BEEP
206
00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:12,960
Ooh.
207
00:10:14,960 --> 00:10:15,960
EXHALES
208
00:10:42,960 --> 00:10:46,000
'I'm afraid
that won't be possible, 8402.'
209
00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:49,960
You see, with my new
one-touch system interface,
210
00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:52,960
I can now control
every inch of the store
211
00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:58,640
without ever having to leave
the safety of my office ever again.
212
00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:00,960
This is inhumane, Simon.
We're not your little robots.
213
00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:02,960
I'm a man.
214
00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:05,960
And I need to pop outside
and have a puff
215
00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:07,960
of my strawberry
bubble gum-flavoured water vapour.
216
00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:09,480
Now please just open the door!
217
00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:12,960
'Is that insubordination I sense,
8402?'
218
00:11:12,960 --> 00:11:14,800
'No, I-I'm sorry,
I shouldn't have...'
219
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:18,960
Perhaps you need a moment
to, er, cool down.
220
00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:23,960
SIMON CACKLES
No. Please.
221
00:11:23,960 --> 00:11:25,960
CACKLING CONTINUES
222
00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:29,960
GROANS
223
00:11:30,960 --> 00:11:32,960
SIGHS,
SCOFFS
224
00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:35,960
'Oh, I thought it would be better
than that.'
225
00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:45,960
Remove. Remove.
226
00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:48,960
Remove. Remove.
Remove. Remove. Remove.
227
00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:49,960
Destroy.
228
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:51,960
Remove. Remove. Remove.
229
00:11:51,960 --> 00:11:53,960
Remove. Remove.
230
00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:56,960
Remove. Remove. Remove. Remove.
231
00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:00,800
LIV LAUGHS
232
00:12:01,960 --> 00:12:04,960
Oh, my God, don't be such a square.
'Please enter item manually.'
233
00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:07,960
Steady on. Most people pay extra
for that kind of thing.
234
00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:10,960
I need you and your superhuman ego
to put a stop to Simon.
235
00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:12,960
All this new technology's
tearing people apart.
236
00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:14,960
And by "people",
you mean "you and Millie"?
237
00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:16,960
Pfft! No.
238
00:12:17,960 --> 00:12:19,960
Although since you asked,
the stupid new headset
239
00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:21,960
is making her act
like I don't even exist.
240
00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:23,960
Or maybe
she's just not that into you.
241
00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:25,960
If you've come
for relationship advice,
242
00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:28,960
I've kind of got my own thing
going on right now.
243
00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:30,640
'Hello, Thomas.'
244
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:33,960
S-Sorry, what am I looking at?
245
00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:35,960
His name is Scaniel Radcliffe.
246
00:12:35,960 --> 00:12:36,960
His name is Scaniel Radcliffe?
247
00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:39,480
His name is Scaniel Radcliffe.
248
00:12:39,480 --> 00:12:40,960
And we were having
a very nice conversation
249
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:41,960
before you came along.
250
00:12:41,960 --> 00:12:44,160
'Is there a problem?'
Calm down, babe, he's a friend.
251
00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:45,960
Am I the only person left
in the shop
252
00:12:45,960 --> 00:12:48,960
that isn't being
actively driven insane by a machine?
253
00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:52,960
You know what? This ends now.
254
00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:56,960
Ignore him. He's never gonna
understand what we have.
255
00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:05,960
Yes.
256
00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:07,960
KNOCK AT DOOR
My little worker bees.
257
00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:10,960
Bring the honey to your Daddy Queen.
258
00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:13,960
Simon, let me in! Simon!
THOMAS GRUNTS
259
00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:17,960
HISSES
260
00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:20,960
I didn't have time to think
of a clever catchphrase.
261
00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:24,000
Simon, your precious technology is
bringing the worst out in everybody.
262
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:25,960
You've become
a paranoid control freak.
263
00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:27,960
Liv's narcissism is off the scale.
264
00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,960
Millie's gonna work herself
into an early grave,
265
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:33,960
and who even knows what
darkly ironic, Black Mirror-style
266
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:36,960
sci-fi horror situation
Beefy Linda's got herself into.
267
00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:41,960
CHUCKLES
268
00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:43,960
Did you see that?
LAUGHS
269
00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:44,960
Oh, my God.
270
00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:48,960
THOMAS SIGHS
271
00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:51,000
You're putting people's jobs
and lives
272
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:54,960
and casual work friendships at risk.
273
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:57,800
It's time for the experiment to end.
274
00:13:57,800 --> 00:14:01,960
No. People come and go, 8402.
275
00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:05,960
Stay focused on what's important -
professional achievement.
276
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:10,000
There is no room for sentiment
on the road to progress.
277
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,960
Consider the bigger picture.
278
00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:14,960
HISSES
279
00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:16,960
It's today's date.
280
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:19,960
I guess these must have come for you
this morning.
281
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:21,960
I'm... I'm sorry.
282
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:25,640
You think the more control you have,
283
00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:27,960
the less chance there'll be
of you ever getting hurt again.
284
00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:29,960
But life's about learning to live
with the things
285
00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:30,960
that you can't control.
286
00:14:32,160 --> 00:14:33,960
I know what it's like, I do.
287
00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:39,960
Shutting off the parts of you that
feel pain, or wanting to, at least.
288
00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:42,960
But...
289
00:14:42,960 --> 00:14:45,000
you're not a "machine-ager", Simon.
290
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,960
You're a "man-ager".
291
00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:49,960
And right now,
your employees need your help.
292
00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:50,960
Hm.
293
00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:53,960
Simon?
Hm.
294
00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:54,960
Simon?
295
00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:56,320
Hmm.
296
00:14:56,320 --> 00:14:57,960
- Simon?
- Hmm.
297
00:14:57,960 --> 00:14:59,960
Oh, well. Can't win them all.
THOMAS GRUNTS
298
00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:04,960
Just scoot you over there.
299
00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:10,960
THOMAS SIGHS
Oh, Millie.
300
00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:12,800
If only you knew.
301
00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:16,960
MILLIE YELLS
302
00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:18,960
Ooh, that's a bit excessive.
303
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:19,960
MILLIE YELLS
304
00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:23,960
Remove!
305
00:15:25,960 --> 00:15:26,960
Liv! Liv!
306
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:28,960
Remove. Remove. Liv.
307
00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:36,960
BREATHES HEAVILY
Liv, Millie's gonna kill you.
308
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:37,960
Wh...?
309
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:39,960
This isn't what it looks like.
310
00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:43,000
'Unexpected item in bagging area.'
311
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:44,960
Liv!
Oh! She's here!
312
00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:47,960
THOMAS
BREATHES HEAVILY
313
00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:58,960
Hellooo.
314
00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:06,960
Millie, it's me, it's your
assistant manager, Thomas Rice.
315
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:10,960
I know you're still in there,
and I know you don't wanna do this.
316
00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:12,960
We all wanna kill Liv, we do.
317
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:15,640
But we can't, we're family.
318
00:16:15,640 --> 00:16:17,960
And family don't cut each other
out of each other's lives.
319
00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:21,960
Neither literally or figuratively.
320
00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:24,960
Millie, please, just...
321
00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:26,960
just take off the headset.
322
00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:32,960
THOMAS
BREATHES HEAVILY
323
00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:34,960
Ah.
324
00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:38,960
YELLS
325
00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:40,960
No! No, no, no, wait! Wait!
326
00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:42,800
Wait!
327
00:16:42,800 --> 00:16:44,960
DANCE MUSIC PLAYS
Oh...
328
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:57,960
Thomas, what are you doing?
329
00:16:57,960 --> 00:17:01,960
In order to defeat a machine,
one must think like a machine.
330
00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:03,960
This is literally bringing
nothing to the table!
331
00:17:03,960 --> 00:17:05,960
You think of something better!
332
00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:10,960
YELLS,
THOMAS SCREAMS
333
00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:16,800
Who is doing this?!
334
00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:21,480
And lo... God sent a flood to wash
away all that he had created.
335
00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:24,000
'Insert your card.
Massive savings. Please. Save.
336
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:26,960
'Insert your card.
Massive savings.'
337
00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:28,960
SOBS
338
00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:31,480
'Please insert your card.'
No! No! No!
339
00:17:31,480 --> 00:17:33,800
'Please. Savings. Savings.
Please save.
340
00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:35,160
'Please save. Olivia.'
No, no, no, no!
341
00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:37,960
'Please save. Save. Save. Save.
342
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:39,960
'Goodbye.'
343
00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:42,160
Goodbye, Scaniel.
344
00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:45,960
Get it off, get it off!
Millie!
345
00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:47,160
SHE SHRIEKS
Millie!
346
00:17:47,160 --> 00:17:48,960
SHE SQUEALS
347
00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:52,960
SHE GASPS
348
00:17:52,960 --> 00:17:54,960
Tom. What happened?
349
00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:10,960
# Because love can carry me, ooh
350
00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:17,960
# To you
351
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:22,800
# To you... #
352
00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:23,960
RUMBLING
353
00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:27,960
# It's a simple truth that I... #
354
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:29,960
SHE RETCHES,
SPLASH
355
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:31,960
SHE COUGHS
356
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:34,160
Those hotdogs I ate!
SHE RETCHES
357
00:18:35,960 --> 00:18:37,960
HE RETCHES,
SPLASH
358
00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:46,960
THEY RETCH
359
00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:51,960
'Good morning, team.'
360
00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:52,960
SIMON YAWNS
361
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:56,960
'Simon here to remind you
that Pellocks "wuvs woo"
362
00:18:56,960 --> 00:18:59,960
'and that I'm really sorry
about last night. Ha!'
363
00:18:59,960 --> 00:19:03,960
It would have never worked out.
You were too similar.
364
00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:05,960
Also, it's an industrial appliance.
365
00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:07,960
Yeah, well,
at least he treated me with respect.
366
00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:11,800
I didn't go on a date tonight.
367
00:19:11,800 --> 00:19:12,960
He texted half an hour before
368
00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:15,960
saying he didn't want to go out
with me because I used to be a man.
369
00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:19,960
I told him, "Everyone you've ever
slept with used to be a child."
370
00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:21,960
Call me a sceptic,
I reckon that's probably worse.
371
00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:26,960
I am sick of men making me feel like
I'm only half a woman.
372
00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:29,960
Join the club, sister.
How are you feeling?
373
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:31,960
Better.
374
00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:33,960
Sprinkler brought
my temperature down.
375
00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:37,960
I am sorry I tried to murder you
with a cleaver.
376
00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:40,000
I feel like a right berk.
THEY CHUCKLE
377
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:41,960
'In a funny way,
378
00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:43,960
'I think last night might have
brought us closer together.'
379
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:46,480
Ah...
LAUGHS
380
00:19:46,480 --> 00:19:49,960
Me and Tom are gonna go
to the staff room for a Pot Noodle.
381
00:19:49,960 --> 00:19:50,960
Do you wanna join us?
382
00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:54,960
Erm... no.
383
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:55,960
No, do you know what?
384
00:19:55,960 --> 00:19:57,960
I reckon I'm just gonna stay here
and have a little cry.
385
00:19:57,960 --> 00:19:59,960
You two should go on your own.
386
00:20:00,960 --> 00:20:02,960
Millie, y-you go ahead,
I'll catch you up.
387
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:05,800
I'm just gonna have
a little moment with Liv. Thanks.
388
00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:11,640
Have you got any advice?
Erm, yeah.
389
00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:13,960
Never...
390
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:15,320
Yeah? Mm-hm.
..ever... ever...
391
00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:16,960
Yeah.
..do anal.
392
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:17,960
What?
393
00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:21,640
I knew a girl called Genevieve.
She tried anal with her boyfriend.
394
00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:24,960
She farted halfway through,
and his testicles exploded.
395
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:26,960
That's a good chat, thanks.
Yeah.
396
00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:28,960
Yeah, that's really useful.
THOMAS GRUNTS
397
00:20:32,960 --> 00:20:33,960
PHONE CHIMES
398
00:20:43,960 --> 00:20:47,960
'Welcome back, Olivia. Let's begin.'
399
00:20:48,960 --> 00:20:50,960
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