All language subtitles for The Big C S01E08 Happy Birthday Cancer 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP5 1 H 264-Kitsune_track4_[eng]

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,675 --> 00:00:10,877  [Leftover Cuties'   Game Called Life]  2 00:00:10,910 --> 00:00:12,912  - ♪ IT'S SO HARD ♪  3 00:00:12,946 --> 00:00:18,118     ♪ TO TURN YOUR LIFE OVER ♪  4 00:00:19,753 --> 00:00:21,654  ♪ STEP OUT ♪  5 00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:26,593      ♪ OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE ♪  6 00:00:28,561 --> 00:00:32,098  ♪ IS THIS   SOME KIND OF A JOKE? ♪  7 00:00:32,132 --> 00:00:36,870  ♪ WILL SOMEONE   WAKE ME UP SOON ♪  8 00:00:36,903 --> 00:00:42,308     ♪ AND TELL ME THIS WAS JUST       A GAME WE PLAY ♪  9 00:00:42,342 --> 00:00:47,680  ♪ CALLED LIFE? ♪  10 00:00:56,489 --> 00:00:58,958  - IT'S A WEDDING CAKE.   - YEP.  11 00:00:58,992 --> 00:01:00,160  IT'S MY BIRTHDAY.  12 00:01:00,193 --> 00:01:01,661  AND INSTEAD   OF WAITING TO SEE  13 00:01:01,694 --> 00:01:03,329  IF ANYONE REMEMBERS   TO GET ME A CAKE,  14 00:01:03,363 --> 00:01:04,998  I THOUGHT I'D GET ONE   FOR MYSELF.  15 00:01:05,031 --> 00:01:06,933      YOU KN WHAT MY FAVORITE   KIND OF CAKE IS?  16 00:01:06,966 --> 00:01:08,868  - WEDDING CAKE.   - WELL...  17 00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:11,438  IT'S WHITE CAKE      WITH BUTTERCREAM FROSTING.  18 00:01:11,471 --> 00:01:12,505  BUT FOR SOME REASON,  19 00:01:12,539 --> 00:01:14,741  IT ALWAYS TASTES BEST   AS A WEDDING CAKE.  20 00:01:14,774 --> 00:01:15,875  I'M TRYING NOT TO WORRY   ABOUT THE FACT  21 00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:18,411  THAT SAMANTHA AND JOHN   NEVER PICKED IT UP.  22 00:01:18,445 --> 00:01:20,547  HERE.  23 00:01:20,580 --> 00:01:23,183     - SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO   TO CELEBRATE...  24 00:01:23,216 --> 00:01:25,952  BESIDES EAT 40 POUNDS   OF CAKE?  25 00:01:25,985 --> 00:01:29,189  - I DON'T KNOW.  26 00:01:29,222 --> 00:01:32,192  THIS COULD BE   MY LAST BIRTHDAY.  27 00:01:32,225 --> 00:01:34,461  THE ANXIETY OF TRYING TO DECIDE     WHAT TO DO IS...  28 00:01:34,494 --> 00:01:37,030  - KILLING YOU?  29 00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:42,735  - WHAT'S IT FEEL LIKE   TO BE OLD, MARLENE?  30 00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:45,472      - FEELS LIKE I'M WEARING   MY SKIN LIKE A SWEATER.  31 00:01:45,505 --> 00:01:47,207  [door opens]  32 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:51,344  - I GOT THE PAINT      FOR THE BACK DOOR, MARLENE.      33 00:01:51,377 --> 00:01:53,580  WHY ARE YOU EATING   WEDDING CAKE?  34 00:01:53,613 --> 00:01:57,150  - 'CAUSE EITHER JOHN OR SAMANTHA   GOT COLD FEET.  35 00:01:57,183 --> 00:01:58,151  - OH.  36 00:01:58,184 --> 00:01:59,552  ADAM,       WHEN YOU PAINT THE DOOR,  37 00:01:59,586 --> 00:02:01,187     MAKE SURE THAT YOU PUT TAPE       ON THE GLASS,  38 00:02:01,221 --> 00:02:02,555     OR YOU'LL GET PAINT ON IT.   - REALLY, MOM?  39 00:02:02,589 --> 00:02:04,858    'CAUSE I WAS JUST GONNA PAINT      RIGHT OVER THE WINDOWS.  40 00:02:04,891 --> 00:02:06,292  - AND MAKE SURE   THAT YOU DON'T GET  41 00:02:06,326 --> 00:02:08,328    TOO MUCH PAINT ON THE BRUSH,          OR IT'LL DRIP DOWN THE DOOR      42 00:02:08,361 --> 00:02:09,462  AND LOOK GOOPY.  43 00:02:09,496 --> 00:02:12,165  - MAYBE   YOU SHOULD JUST DO IT.  44 00:02:14,868 --> 00:02:16,202  - IS HE A GOOD KID,   MARLENE?  45 00:02:16,236 --> 00:02:17,737  I JUST WANT HIM   TO BE A GOOD KID.  46 00:02:17,770 --> 00:02:18,771  - HE'S FINE.  47 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:21,474  YOU'RE THE PAIN   IN THE ASS.  48 00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:28,882  - HEY.  49 00:02:28,915 --> 00:02:32,252  HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.   [chuckles]  50 00:02:32,285 --> 00:02:33,753  I LOVE YOUR DRESS.  51 00:02:33,786 --> 00:02:36,356  - THANK YOU.   - OH...  52 00:02:36,389 --> 00:02:38,458  FOR YOU.  53 00:02:43,563 --> 00:02:47,267  I SAW THIS COLOR   AND THOUGHT OF YOU.  54 00:02:47,300 --> 00:02:49,836      - OH, IT'S--IT'S PERFECT.  55 00:02:49,869 --> 00:02:51,271      EVER SINCE THE BEGINNING   OF THE SUMMER,  56 00:02:51,304 --> 00:02:54,274     I'VE JUST--I'VE BEEN SEEING       COLORS MORE BRIGHTLY.  57 00:02:54,307 --> 00:02:57,677  IT'S--      EVEN WHEN I'M SAD, IT'S...  58 00:02:57,710 --> 00:02:59,546  IT'S LIKE EVERYTHING'S   JUST MORE VIBRANT.  59 00:02:59,579 --> 00:03:01,648  - DO NOT BE SAD TODAY,   'CAUSE TODAY IS YOUR BIRTHDAY.     60 00:03:01,714 --> 00:03:03,983  - I'M NOT SAD NOW.  61 00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:07,053  - [chuckling]   MMM.  62 00:03:07,086 --> 00:03:10,390    SO, LISTEN, I-I-I'VE DECIDED       TO GO TO THE BAHAMAS  63 00:03:10,423 --> 00:03:12,158     TO A FRIEND'S ART OPENING.  64 00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:14,661  THERE'S A FLIGHT OUT   TONIGHT,  65 00:03:14,694 --> 00:03:16,896      SO I WOULD LOVE TO SPEND   THE DAY WITH YOU.  66 00:03:16,930 --> 00:03:19,032  - HOW EXOTIC.  67 00:03:19,065 --> 00:03:21,968  GOING TO THE BAHAMAS   FOR AN ART OPENING.  68 00:03:22,001 --> 00:03:24,437    - YEAH, JUST FOR THE WEEKEND.     69 00:03:24,470 --> 00:03:25,805  - I WANT TO GO.  70 00:03:25,838 --> 00:03:27,507  - WHA--REALLY?   - YEAH.  71 00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:28,575  - REALLY?   - FOR MY BIRTHDAY,  72 00:03:28,608 --> 00:03:29,842      THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO DO.  73 00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,311  - OH.   - YEAH.  74 00:03:31,344 --> 00:03:34,347  JUST--I HAVEN'T TRAVELED ENOUGH     IN MY 43 YEARS.  75 00:03:34,380 --> 00:03:36,316  I'M ALWAYS TALKING     ABOUT VACATIONS I NEVER TAKE.     76 00:03:36,349 --> 00:03:39,953      I SHOP FOR BATHING SUITS   I NEVER BUY.  77 00:03:39,986 --> 00:03:41,654     WILL YOU TAKE ME WITH YOU?  78 00:03:41,688 --> 00:03:43,523  - OF COUR--COME ON.  79 00:03:43,556 --> 00:03:45,391  - OH.   - YES! ALL RIGHT.  80 00:03:45,425 --> 00:03:47,227  I'LL PICK YOU UP     IN, WHAT, A COUPLE OF HOURS?      81 00:03:47,260 --> 00:03:48,861     WE'LL GET SOMETHING TO EAT.      82 00:03:48,895 --> 00:03:51,431  PACK LIGHT.  83 00:03:51,464 --> 00:03:53,032  YOU...  84 00:03:53,066 --> 00:03:55,868  YOU...  85 00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:57,537  HAPPY BIRTHDAY.  86 00:03:57,570 --> 00:04:00,073  IT SUITS YOU.   I LIKE IT.  87 00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:06,613  [door closes]  88 00:04:06,646 --> 00:04:09,782  [car door closes]  89 00:04:16,823 --> 00:04:19,525  all:   SURPRISE!  90 00:04:19,559 --> 00:04:22,996  [party horns blowing]  91 00:04:23,029 --> 00:04:24,530  - [laughing]   ARE YOU OKAY?  92 00:04:24,564 --> 00:04:25,898  - OH, YEAH.  93 00:04:25,932 --> 00:04:29,335  YEAH.  94 00:04:29,369 --> 00:04:32,705  YOU GOT ME.   [laughs]  95 00:04:32,739 --> 00:04:35,074  LOOK AT ME.   I'M 43.  96 00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:37,243  [laughter]  97 00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,178  WOW--WOW.  98 00:04:39,212 --> 00:04:42,148  WELL, THIS IS SO NICE   TO SEE...  99 00:04:42,181 --> 00:04:43,750  EVERYBODY.  100 00:04:43,783 --> 00:04:46,119  OH, SUSAN, BILL...  101 00:04:46,152 --> 00:04:47,720  OH, MARLENE...  102 00:04:47,754 --> 00:04:49,689     EVERYBODY HERE IN MY HOUSE.      103 00:04:49,722 --> 00:04:51,624  THIS IS--   OH, THIS IS GREAT.  104 00:04:51,658 --> 00:04:53,559  THIS IS--THIS IS...  105 00:04:53,593 --> 00:04:55,495  WOW, THIS IS--   THIS IS JUST GREAT.  106 00:04:55,528 --> 00:04:56,562  THANK YOU.  107 00:04:56,596 --> 00:04:58,798  - AND I WANT TO SAY   THANK YOU TOO.  108 00:04:58,831 --> 00:05:02,302  THANK YOU, CATHY,   FOR BEING BORN.  109 00:05:02,335 --> 00:05:05,171  SINCE HER BIRTHDAY   IS IN JULY,  110 00:05:05,204 --> 00:05:08,041  SHE'S A CANCER--A CRAB.  111 00:05:08,074 --> 00:05:10,643  AND CATHY CAN BE       A LITTLE CRABBY AT TIMES,  112 00:05:10,677 --> 00:05:14,047      ESPECIALLY IN THE MORNING     AND WHENEVER I CHEW MY FOOD.      113 00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:17,850  BUT UNDERNEATH THAT   SOMETIMES-HARD EXTERIOR SHELL,     114 00:05:17,884 --> 00:05:22,021  THERE'S A SOFT, WARM,   INCREDIBLE PERSON  115 00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:24,290      WHOM THIS BIG TAURUS BULL  116 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:27,827  HAS BEEN LUCKY TO LOVE   AND WILL CONTINUE TO  117 00:05:27,860 --> 00:05:30,430  FOR THE REST   OF OUR LONG LIVES.  118 00:05:30,463 --> 00:05:33,399  HAPPY BIRTHDAY,   MY LITTLE CANCER.  119 00:05:33,433 --> 00:05:35,668  [overlapping chatter   and applause]  120 00:05:35,702 --> 00:05:38,204      - WELL, AIN'T THAT A KICK   IN THE HEAD.  121 00:05:38,237 --> 00:05:40,673  - IS THIS OKAY?  122 00:05:40,707 --> 00:05:43,476  I KNOW WE HAVEN'T BEEN DOING A      WHOLE LOT OF PARTYING RECENTLY,    123 00:05:43,509 --> 00:05:45,445  AND I'M NOT SAYING      IT'S GONNA FIX EVERYTHING,  124 00:05:45,478 --> 00:05:47,814  BUT I COULDN'T IGNORE   YOUR BIRTHDAY.  125 00:05:47,847 --> 00:05:51,584  AND WHO DOESN'T LOVE       A SURPRISE PARTY, RIGHT?  126 00:05:51,617 --> 00:05:53,252  MAYBE YOU.  127 00:05:53,286 --> 00:05:55,888  BUT WE DON'T KNOW   TILL YOU GET ONE.  128 00:05:55,922 --> 00:05:58,291  - AH, IT'S--      IT'S VERY THOUGHTFUL, PAUL.      129 00:05:58,324 --> 00:06:00,526  - UM, YOU'RE OUT OF TOILET PAPER   IN THE BATHROOM.  130 00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:02,528  DO YOU HAVE ANY NAPKINS   I COULD USE?  131 00:06:02,562 --> 00:06:05,231  - OH--OH, MY GOD.  132 00:06:05,264 --> 00:06:08,568  I CANNOT BELIEVE   I AM SEEING YOU.  133 00:06:08,601 --> 00:06:09,836  OH, MY...  134 00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:11,304  [both laughing]  135 00:06:11,337 --> 00:06:13,639    PAUL, YOU REMEMBER I TOLD YOU      HOW REBECCA AND I,  136 00:06:13,673 --> 00:06:15,074  WHEN WE WERE       COLLEGE ROOMMATES, WE'D--  137 00:06:15,108 --> 00:06:17,443  INSTEAD OF BUYING   TOILET PAPER, WE'D--  138 00:06:17,477 --> 00:06:20,580  WE'D GO TO THE ICE CREAM STORE      BELOW OUR APARTMENT  139 00:06:20,613 --> 00:06:21,681  AND STEAL THE NAPKINS.  140 00:06:21,714 --> 00:06:23,483  - THAT'S A ROUGH WAY   TO WIPE.  141 00:06:23,516 --> 00:06:24,817  - [laughing]   YEAH.  142 00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:26,419  - OH, IT'S--   IT'S BEEN FOREVER.  143 00:06:26,452 --> 00:06:28,321      ARE YOU STILL IN CHICAGO?  144 00:06:28,354 --> 00:06:30,056  - I'M STILL IN CHICAGO.      - WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?  145 00:06:30,089 --> 00:06:31,557  - WHAT DO YOU MEAN   WHAT'S SHE DOING HERE?  146 00:06:31,591 --> 00:06:32,825    SHE'S YOUR BIRTHDAY PRESENT.      147 00:06:32,859 --> 00:06:36,095  I-I-I WAS THINKING       ABOUT HOW MUCH I'D GOTTEN  148 00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:39,065  OUT OF THE HOURS      I SPENT TALKING TO ANGELA--      149 00:06:39,098 --> 00:06:40,233  MY THERAPIST--   - AH.  150 00:06:40,266 --> 00:06:41,501  - AND IT MADE ME THINK   ABOUT THE HOURS  151 00:06:41,534 --> 00:06:43,669  THAT YOU TWO      USED TO SPEND GABBING AWAY.      152 00:06:43,703 --> 00:06:45,471  SO GAB AWAY, LADIES!  153 00:06:45,505 --> 00:06:46,739  HAPPBIRTHDAY.  154 00:06:48,374 --> 00:06:49,375  - WOW.  155 00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:52,812  IT IS GREAT TO SEE YOU.   IT'S SURREAL.  156 00:06:52,845 --> 00:06:56,849  - I-I-I AM SO SORRY       WE HAVEN'T BEEN IN TOUCH.  157 00:06:56,883 --> 00:06:59,519  I-I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER   WHAT OUR FALLING OUT WAS ABOUT.    158 00:06:59,552 --> 00:07:01,387  I'M--I'M SURE   IT WAS MY FAULT.  159 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:02,922  - YOU DIDN'T COME   TO MY WEDDING.  160 00:07:02,955 --> 00:07:04,457  YOU MET THAT GUY  161 00:07:04,490 --> 00:07:06,192  THREE DAYS BEFORE   AND WENT CAMPING.  162 00:07:06,225 --> 00:07:07,226  - OH.  163 00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:08,494  - IT WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SO BAD     164 00:07:08,528 --> 00:07:10,029  IF YOU WEREN'T   THE MAID OF HONOR.  165 00:07:10,062 --> 00:07:12,131  - OH, GOD.  166 00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:15,334  I'M SO SORRY.   IT WAS ME.  167 00:07:15,368 --> 00:07:18,604  [scoffs]   ME AND MEN, HUH?  168 00:07:18,638 --> 00:07:20,306  - IT'S OKAY.  169 00:07:20,339 --> 00:07:23,443      IT'S--IT'S BEEN 15 YEARS.       IT DOESN'T STING ANYMORE.  170 00:07:23,476 --> 00:07:25,611  - WELL, GOOD.  171 00:07:25,645 --> 00:07:27,880  [both screaming]  172 00:07:27,914 --> 00:07:30,149  TELL ME EVERYTHING.  173 00:07:30,183 --> 00:07:31,918      I WANT TO KNOW EVERYTHING   ABOUT YOU  174 00:07:31,951 --> 00:07:33,252  AND WHAT'S GOING ON   WITH YOU.  175 00:07:33,286 --> 00:07:34,720  SO WHAT IS--      WHAT IS GOING ON WITH YOU?  176 00:07:34,754 --> 00:07:37,356      WHAT IS THE BIGGEST THING  177 00:07:37,390 --> 00:07:42,261  HAPPENING IN YOUR LIFE   RIGHT NOW?  178 00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:43,830  - NOTHING.  179 00:07:43,863 --> 00:07:45,498  WOULD YOU--   WOULD YOU EXCUSE ME  180 00:07:45,531 --> 00:07:48,267      JUST FOR--JUST FOR ONE--   JUST FOR ONE MINUTE?  181 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:49,769  - SURE.  182 00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:52,238  YOU LOOK SO GREAT.  183 00:07:55,942 --> 00:07:59,278  [cell phone beeping]  184 00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:02,014  [sighs]  185 00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:03,282  LENNY, HEY, IT'S CATHY.  186 00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:06,619  UM, AH, CALL ME BACK.      OR--OR DON'T CALL ME BACK.  187 00:08:06,652 --> 00:08:08,287  BUT I-I DON'T THINK      YOU SHOULD COME OVER HERE,  188 00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,723    BECAUSE SOMETHING HAS COME--       [doorbell rings]  189 00:08:18,064 --> 00:08:20,299  - HELLO.   - LENNY!  190 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,001  HI. WELCOME.  191 00:08:22,034 --> 00:08:24,704     HI. THIS IS--THIS IS LENNY.       HE'S AN ARTIST.  192 00:08:24,737 --> 00:08:26,272  AND THIS   IS MY HUSBAND, PAUL.  193 00:08:26,305 --> 00:08:29,308  - OH, GOOD TO MEET YOU.      - NICE TO MEET YOU, LENNY.  194 00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,077  - LENNY'S AN ARTIST.   OH, I SAID THAT.  195 00:08:31,110 --> 00:08:32,545  YEAH.   - YEAH.  196 00:08:32,578 --> 00:08:35,147    - HE--HE WORKS AT THE SCHOOL,        AND I ASKED HIM TO COME OVER,     197 00:08:35,181 --> 00:08:37,750  UM, AND LOOK       AT THE UPSTAIRS HALLWAY,  198 00:08:37,783 --> 00:08:39,819  'CAUSE I WAS THINKING     ABOUT DOING A MURAL UP THERE.     199 00:08:39,852 --> 00:08:41,220  I SAW IT ON--  200 00:08:41,254 --> 00:08:42,989  YOU KNOW, SOMETHING THAT I SAW         ON ONE OF THOSE HOME SHOWS.      201 00:08:43,022 --> 00:08:44,490  - LISTEN, I'M ON MY WAY   OUT OF TOWN,  202 00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:46,425    AND I JUST THOUGHT, YOU KNOW,         I'VE GOT A WINDOW OF TIME.  203 00:08:46,459 --> 00:08:47,660  I'LL JUST COME AND TAKE       A QUICK LOOK AT IT AND--  204 00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:50,162  - COME ON IN.   IT'S CATHY'S BIRTHDAY.  205 00:08:50,196 --> 00:08:52,031      YEAH, LOOK AT THE WALLS.  206 00:08:52,064 --> 00:08:53,799  HAVE A SPRING ROLL.   ENJOY YOURSELF.  207 00:08:53,833 --> 00:08:55,234     - NO, I'LL--I'LL COME BACK   ANOTHER TIME.  208 00:08:55,268 --> 00:08:56,836  YOU GUYS--   - IT'S A PARTY, MAN.  209 00:08:56,869 --> 00:08:58,271      - IT'S A SURPRISE PARTY.   - COME ON IN.  210 00:08:58,304 --> 00:09:01,307  - ALL RIGHT, ONE DRINK.   ONE DRINK.  211 00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:11,784  - I AM FREAKING OUT--   A LOT OF ANXIETY.  212 00:09:11,817 --> 00:09:14,754  - DON'T FREAK OUT. IT'S A PARTY     THROWN JUST FOR YOU.  213 00:09:14,787 --> 00:09:17,356     SO HAVE A COUPLE OF DRINKS.       TALK TO YOUR FRIENDS.  214 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:19,225  ENJOY YOURSELF.       - WHAT ABOUT THE BAHAMAS?  215 00:09:19,258 --> 00:09:20,426  - MM.  216 00:09:20,459 --> 00:09:23,396      - I WANT TO BE ON A BEACH   WITHOUT MY SHIRT ON,  217 00:09:23,429 --> 00:09:27,199    NO SUNSCREEN, SUNNING MYSELF       WITH WILD ABANDON.  218 00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:28,301  DO YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS  219 00:09:28,334 --> 00:09:29,769  WHEN I TRY AND DO   SOMETHING SPONTANEOUS?  220 00:09:29,802 --> 00:09:32,104      I GET SCREWED OUT OF IT.   - LISTEN...  221 00:09:32,138 --> 00:09:33,940  OUR FLIGHT   LEAVES LATE, OKAY?  222 00:09:33,973 --> 00:09:35,741  SO MAYBE   YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL.  223 00:09:35,775 --> 00:09:36,943  THESE PEOPLE ARE OLD.  224 00:09:36,976 --> 00:09:39,512  THEY DON'T PARTY LONG.  225 00:09:39,545 --> 00:09:42,014  YOU MAKE SENSE.   - MM-HMM.  226 00:09:42,048 --> 00:09:43,816  - YOU'RE A BAD IDEA  227 00:09:43,849 --> 00:09:46,218  WITH A GOOD HEAD   ON YOUR SHOULDERS.  228 00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:48,387  - SEE YOU OUT THERE.  229 00:09:55,127 --> 00:09:57,496  - WELL, AT LEAST   YOU'RE NOT A RACIST.  230 00:09:57,530 --> 00:09:58,831  - WHAT?  231 00:09:58,864 --> 00:10:00,533     - I SAW THAT LITTLE CARESS.      232 00:10:00,566 --> 00:10:02,368      VERY LITTLE GETS PAST ME.  233 00:10:02,401 --> 00:10:05,104      SO...IS THAT YOUR LOVER?  234 00:10:05,137 --> 00:10:09,008      HAS THAT BLACK COCK BEEN       INSIDE YOUR WHITE VAGINA?  235 00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:11,877    - I'M GONNA GO HAVE FUN NOW.      236 00:10:11,911 --> 00:10:14,213  - HEY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY,   MRS. JAMISON.  237 00:10:14,246 --> 00:10:16,015  - OH, THANK YOU, BRENT.  238 00:10:16,048 --> 00:10:17,683      - CARE FOR AN APPETIZER?  239 00:10:17,717 --> 00:10:19,151    - OH, WHAT DO WE HAVE THERE?      240 00:10:19,185 --> 00:10:21,120  - DAD ORDERED A BUNCH OF STUFF      FROM THIS ASIAN PLACE  241 00:10:21,153 --> 00:10:22,855    'CAUSE YOU LIKE CHINESE FOOD.     242 00:10:22,888 --> 00:10:25,791  THESE ARE CALLED, UM,   BUKKAKE.  243 00:10:25,825 --> 00:10:27,927  - BUKKAKE.   - YEP.  244 00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:29,629    THAT'S WHAT THEY CALLED THEM.     245 00:10:29,662 --> 00:10:31,464  - MMM.  246 00:10:31,497 --> 00:10:34,000  - I KNOW. THEY'RE GOOD, RIGHT?      - YEAH, THEY ARE.  247 00:10:34,033 --> 00:10:37,036  AND SO ARE YOU GUYS.   YOU'RE BEING VERY SWEET, ADAM.     248 00:10:37,069 --> 00:10:39,171  THANK YOU.       - YOU'RE SO WELCOME, MOM.  249 00:10:39,205 --> 00:10:41,007  BUKKAKE, FRESH BUKKAKE.   - FRESH BUKKAKE.  250 00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:42,108  - I'LL HAVE   A BUKKAKE.  251 00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:45,311  - HAPPY BIRTHDAY,   SWEETHEART.  252 00:10:45,344 --> 00:10:47,546  YOU LOOK LIKE   YOU'RE GETTING YOUNGER,  253 00:10:47,580 --> 00:10:48,714  NOT OLDER.  254 00:10:48,748 --> 00:10:50,583     - SO DO YOU, AUNT ALLISON.  255 00:10:50,616 --> 00:10:52,451  - OH.  256 00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:53,986  AND YOU'RE SO SKINNY.  257 00:10:54,020 --> 00:10:56,555  YOU COULD STILL SHOP      IN THE JUNIOR'S DEPARTMENT.      258 00:10:56,589 --> 00:10:58,424     EVERYTHING'S CHEAPER THERE.      259 00:10:58,457 --> 00:11:01,027  GOT THIS BABY 30 BUCKS.  260 00:11:01,060 --> 00:11:02,561  - WHAT A DEAL.   - [laughs]  261 00:11:02,595 --> 00:11:04,430  - THANK YOU SO MUCH   FOR COMING.  262 00:11:04,463 --> 00:11:05,898  I'M GONNA GO REFILL   MY GLASS.  263 00:11:05,931 --> 00:11:09,468  - ALL RIGHT.  264 00:11:11,003 --> 00:11:13,172  - WHO'S THAT?   - OH...  265 00:11:13,205 --> 00:11:14,940  PAUL'S AUNT.  266 00:11:14,974 --> 00:11:16,742  - [laughing]   WHAT'S WITH HER FACE?  267 00:11:16,776 --> 00:11:19,612    - OH, I KNOW. IT'S TERRIBLE.           SHE CAN'T LEAVE IT ALONE.  268 00:11:19,645 --> 00:11:21,781  - YOU HAVE   SO MANY FRIENDS HERE.  269 00:11:21,814 --> 00:11:23,482  IT MAKES ME FEEL BAD.  270 00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,618  I DON'T KNOW THE PEOPLE   IN YOUR LIFE ANYMORE.  271 00:11:25,651 --> 00:11:29,855  - OH, WELL, THEY'RE NOT FRIENDS         THE WAY WE WERE FRIENDS.  272 00:11:29,889 --> 00:11:32,324  COWORKERS OF PAUL'S,  273 00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:34,393  A LOT OF PARENTS   OF ADAM'S FRIENDS.  274 00:11:34,427 --> 00:11:36,696     I MEAN, ADAM'S UNKNOWINGLY       BEEN CHOOSING MY FRIENDS  275 00:11:36,729 --> 00:11:37,830  SINCE HE WAS TWO.  276 00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:39,598  - WELL, I WOULDN'T KNOW   ABOUT THAT,  277 00:11:39,632 --> 00:11:41,434  BUT HOW'S ABOUT THIS   FOR AN OLD FRIEND?  278 00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:44,303  I'M MAKING   "WHAT THE HELL?" SHOTS.  279 00:11:44,336 --> 00:11:45,905    - YOU'RE STILL MAKING THOSE?      280 00:11:45,938 --> 00:11:48,040      - WELL, THEY'RE DIFFERENT   EVERY TIME.  281 00:11:48,074 --> 00:11:51,110  I GET SO DRUNK,     I FORGET WHAT I PUT IN THEM.      282 00:11:51,143 --> 00:11:52,912  both:   WHAT THE HELL?  283 00:11:52,945 --> 00:11:55,147  [Cathy winces]  284 00:11:55,181 --> 00:11:57,450  - HEY, MOM,   CAN I DRINK TONIGHT?  285 00:11:57,483 --> 00:12:00,352  - NO, YOU CANNOT.  286 00:12:00,386 --> 00:12:01,954  - IS THAT ADAM?  287 00:12:01,987 --> 00:12:03,723  [gasps]   OH, MY GOD.  288 00:12:03,756 --> 00:12:06,992  I CAN'T BELIEVE   YOU HAVE A TEENAGER.  289 00:12:07,026 --> 00:12:08,494  HE'S SO HANDSOME.  290 00:12:08,527 --> 00:12:09,929  YOU KNOW...  291 00:12:09,962 --> 00:12:14,033  HE LOOKS JUST AS IF       YOU AND PAUL HAD A BABY.  292 00:12:14,066 --> 00:12:15,701  - WE DID.  293 00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:18,104  - OH, HERE'S TO BABIES.  294 00:12:18,137 --> 00:12:20,306  both:   WHAT THE HELL?  295 00:12:25,211 --> 00:12:26,378  - LENNY.   - HEY.  296 00:12:26,412 --> 00:12:28,347  - LENNY, HELP ME OUT.  297 00:12:28,380 --> 00:12:30,082    I CANNOT DRINK WHISKEY ALONE.     298 00:12:30,116 --> 00:12:32,752  I MEAN, I WILL       IF IT'S THE LAST RESORT,  299 00:12:32,785 --> 00:12:34,787      BUT THEN I'LL HATE MYSELF   FOR IT.  300 00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:36,822  - THANK YOU.  301 00:12:36,856 --> 00:12:38,591  YOU GOT       A NICE HOUSE HERE, PAUL.  302 00:12:38,624 --> 00:12:40,126  - OH, YEAH, THANKS.   - YEAH.  303 00:12:40,159 --> 00:12:41,894      - IT WAS A LITTLE BEAT UP   WHEN WE MOVED IN,  304 00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:43,929  BUT CATHY REALLY   WHIPPED IT INTO SHAPE.  305 00:12:43,963 --> 00:12:46,499  YOU KNOW, I MEAN,   I'M A CREATIVE GUY,  306 00:12:46,532 --> 00:12:48,901  BUT I NEED A COMPUTER,   YOU KNOW?  307 00:12:48,934 --> 00:12:50,369  I'M VIRTUALLY CREATIVE.  308 00:12:50,402 --> 00:12:52,972  CATHY--TRUE ARTIST...  309 00:12:53,005 --> 00:12:56,408     YOU KNOW, ALBEIT REPRESSED   IF YOU ASK ME.  310 00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:58,144  - IS THAT RIGHT?   - MM-HMM.  311 00:12:58,177 --> 00:13:02,615    I MEAN, SHE MAKES THESE CARDS      FOR ADAM, OUR SON,  312 00:13:02,648 --> 00:13:04,350  THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL   EVERY YEAR.  313 00:13:04,383 --> 00:13:07,653  SHE--SHE, LIKE, DECORATES THEM      WITH PUFFY PAINT  314 00:13:07,686 --> 00:13:09,755  AND, LIKE, DOES   THESE LITTLE COLLAGES,  315 00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:11,423  YOU KNOW,       WITH PICTURES AND STUFF.  316 00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:13,659     I MEAN, WHAT KIND OF PERSON           TAKES THAT AMOUNT OF TIME  317 00:13:13,692 --> 00:13:16,262  TO MAKE SOMEBODY   FEEL SPECIAL, YOU KNOW?  318 00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:18,330  - YEAH.  319 00:13:18,364 --> 00:13:19,799      - TO BE HONEST WITH YOU,  320 00:13:19,832 --> 00:13:21,634  WE'RE GOING THROUGH   A BIT OF A...  321 00:13:21,667 --> 00:13:23,102  ROUGH PATCH RIGHT NOW.  322 00:13:23,135 --> 00:13:27,339  BUT SHE'S PROBABLY     THE NICEST PERSON I EVER MET.     323 00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:29,775  - HERE'S TO CATHY.  324 00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:32,545    - WE SPENT AN ENTIRE SEMESTER      DESIGNING TATTOOS.  325 00:13:32,578 --> 00:13:35,447  AND SOMEHOW,   IN OUR BRILLIANCE,  326 00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:36,949      WE CAME UP WITH THE IDEA  327 00:13:36,982 --> 00:13:40,119     OF--OF GETTING THIS ELEGANT          CURSIVE WRITING THAT SAID--      328 00:13:40,152 --> 00:13:41,453  - "A PAIR OF FREAKS,"  329 00:13:41,487 --> 00:13:43,823     THAT WE WERE BOTH GONNA GET       ON OUR ASS.  330 00:13:43,856 --> 00:13:45,791     - WELL, NOT REALLY OUR ASS.           IT WAS SORT OF THE TOP--  331 00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:48,327  - AND WE WANTED TO GO      TO THE SAME TATTOO ARTIST,  332 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:49,962  'CAUSE WE WANTED THEM       TO LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME.  333 00:13:49,995 --> 00:13:51,797    - MY GOD, I STILL--I REALLY--         I FEEL REALLY BAD ABOUT IT.      334 00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:54,200  - SO I WENT FIRST,      AND WHEN HE FINISHED MINE,  335 00:13:54,233 --> 00:13:57,369  THIS ONE STARTS CRYING   AND RUNS OUT.  336 00:13:57,403 --> 00:13:58,938  - WELL, IT JUST--       IT LOOKED REALLY PAINFUL.  337 00:13:58,971 --> 00:14:00,573  - AND TO THIS DAY,  338 00:14:00,606 --> 00:14:04,109     EVERY TIME SOMEONE SEES IT   AND SAYS,  339 00:14:04,143 --> 00:14:06,579  "A PAIR OF FREAKS--   WHO'S THE OTHER FREAK?"  340 00:14:06,612 --> 00:14:09,582  I HAVE TO SAY      "THERE ISN'T ANOTHER ONE."  341 00:14:09,615 --> 00:14:12,284  I AM THE WHOLE PAIR   OF FREAKS.  342 00:14:12,318 --> 00:14:15,154  - AND HOW MANY PEOPLE   WOULD SEE THAT, WOULD YOU SAY?     343 00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:16,589  - A LOT, CATH.   - MM-HMM.  344 00:14:16,622 --> 00:14:17,957  - A LOT.   - MM-HMM.  345 00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:19,558  - A LOT OF EXPLAINING.   I--  346 00:14:19,592 --> 00:14:21,193  WHY DO YOU KEEP LOOKING   AT YOUR WATCH?  347 00:14:21,227 --> 00:14:23,229      YOU GOT SOMEWHERE TO GO,   BESIDES MIDDLE AGE?  348 00:14:23,262 --> 00:14:24,930  - NO.   [feigns laughter]  349 00:14:24,964 --> 00:14:27,633  - WAIT A MINUTE.   I ALMOST FORGOT.  350 00:14:27,666 --> 00:14:28,968     OKAY, DON'T THINK I'M NUTS,      351 00:14:29,001 --> 00:14:31,470  BUT WHEN I WAS PLANNING   TO COME SEE YOU,  352 00:14:31,503 --> 00:14:33,672  I GOT ALL NOSTALGIC   AND LOOK WHAT I FOUND.  353 00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:35,841     - OH, MY GOD, YOU PACK RAT.      354 00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:37,776  OUR '80s SUNGLASSES.  355 00:14:37,810 --> 00:14:40,980      - WE, I MEAN, WORE THESE.      - WE WORE THEM EVERYWHERE.  356 00:14:41,013 --> 00:14:43,549  - WE WORE THEM   TO THE HEART CONCERT.  357 00:14:43,582 --> 00:14:45,351     - WE WORE THEM EVERYWHERE.   - WE THOUGHT WE LOOKED SO HOT.     358 00:14:45,384 --> 00:14:46,652     - AND APPARENTLY, YOU DID,  359 00:14:46,685 --> 00:14:48,120      BECAUSE YOU MET THAT GUY   AT THE CONCERT,  360 00:14:48,153 --> 00:14:49,922    AND THEN I HAD TO GET A RIDE       BACK TO THE CAMPUS  361 00:14:49,955 --> 00:14:51,357     WITH THOSE SORORITY GIRLS.   - I'M SO SORRY.  362 00:14:51,390 --> 00:14:52,892  - THE SORORITY GIRLS   WHO I JUST RECOGNIZED  363 00:14:52,925 --> 00:14:54,093  EVEN THOUGH I--   - I'M SO SORRY.  364 00:14:54,126 --> 00:14:55,127    - YEAH, YOU SHOULD BE SORRY.      365 00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:56,695  - I'VE BEEN WONDERING   ALL THESE YEARS.  366 00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:58,097  DID YOU GET HOME OKAY?     - YEAH, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.      367 00:14:58,130 --> 00:15:00,232  WHAT THE HELL?      - [laughing] WHAT THE HELL?      368 00:15:00,266 --> 00:15:03,269      - MY RAT BASTARD OF A DAD   TOOK OFF ON MY MOM,  369 00:15:03,302 --> 00:15:05,638  LEFT HER HIGH AND DRY--   TWO KIDS TO FEED.  370 00:15:05,671 --> 00:15:07,973    AND I HAVE NEVER TOLD ANYBODY      BUT CATHY THIS--  371 00:15:08,007 --> 00:15:11,644      I HAD TO WEAR MY SISTER'S     HAND-ME-DOWN PANTS TO SCHOOL.     372 00:15:11,677 --> 00:15:13,245  - [laughs]   OH, MAN.  373 00:15:13,279 --> 00:15:15,114     - YEAH. SHE'S A BIG GIRL--   - OH, THAT IS CRUEL.  374 00:15:15,147 --> 00:15:16,582  - AND STILL IS,   BUT I MEAN, COME ON.  375 00:15:16,615 --> 00:15:18,617  COME ON.   - THAT IS CRUEL.  376 00:15:18,651 --> 00:15:20,019  WE--WE DIDN'T HAVE   ENOUGH MONEY  377 00:15:20,052 --> 00:15:21,754  TO BUY ME A BACKPACK   FOR SCHOOL.  378 00:15:21,787 --> 00:15:23,422  - REALLY?   WHAT DID YOU DO?  379 00:15:23,455 --> 00:15:24,823  - SO MY MOTHER,   BLESS HER,  380 00:15:24,857 --> 00:15:26,926  SHE SENT US TO SCHOOL   WITH A SUITCASE.  381 00:15:26,959 --> 00:15:28,694  - REALLY?   - YEAH.  382 00:15:28,727 --> 00:15:32,064  HAND TO GOD, ME AND MY BROTHER      WERE KNOWN AS THE SUITCASE KIDS.  383 00:15:32,097 --> 00:15:34,767      - OH, MAN, THAT'S HARSH.  384 00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:36,702  YOU KNOW...  385 00:15:36,735 --> 00:15:38,470  I DON'T HAVE   ANY BLACK FRIENDS.  386 00:15:38,504 --> 00:15:40,472    - YOU'RE JUST GONNA GO THERE?     387 00:15:40,506 --> 00:15:42,308  - YEAH.   - YEAH?  388 00:15:42,341 --> 00:15:44,276  - NO DIVERSITY   IN MY WORKPLACE.  389 00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:45,311     WHO ARE WE FUCKING KIDDING?      390 00:15:45,344 --> 00:15:47,212  THERE'S NO DIVERSITY   IN MINNESOTA.  391 00:15:47,246 --> 00:15:50,149    - DUDE, WHO ARE YOU TELLING?          EVEN MY PARENTS ARE WHITE.  392 00:15:50,182 --> 00:15:51,417  - REALLY?   - NO.  393 00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:54,153  - NO, THEY'RE NOT.   THAT'S VERY GOOD.  394 00:15:54,186 --> 00:15:55,487  - KARAOKE!  395 00:15:55,521 --> 00:15:57,690  - OH, YEAH.   - UH-OH.  396 00:15:57,723 --> 00:15:59,258  - OH, YEAH.  397 00:15:59,291 --> 00:16:01,894  - ♪ I'VE BEEN WAITING   FOR YOU ♪  398 00:16:01,927 --> 00:16:05,164  both:   ♪ I'M PRETENDING ♪  399 00:16:05,197 --> 00:16:09,234  ♪ IT'S ALL I CAN DO ♪  400 00:16:09,268 --> 00:16:11,737  ♪ MY LOVE I'M SENDING ♪  401 00:16:11,770 --> 00:16:14,073    - ♪ AIN'T MAKING IT THROUGH ♪         - ♪ AIN'T MAKING ITS WAY ♪  402 00:16:14,106 --> 00:16:16,342  - ♪ TO YOUR HEART ♪   - ♪ TO YOUR HEART ♪  403 00:16:16,375 --> 00:16:20,379  [laughter]  404 00:16:20,412 --> 00:16:23,415  both:   ♪ YOU'VE BEEN HIDING ♪  405 00:16:23,449 --> 00:16:26,652      ♪ NEVER LETTING IT SHOW ♪  406 00:16:26,685 --> 00:16:27,920  ♪ ALWAYS TRYIN'... ♪  407 00:16:27,953 --> 00:16:30,089  - I HAVEN'T SEEN HER       ENJOYING HERSELF SO MUCH  408 00:16:30,122 --> 00:16:31,690  IN A LONG TIME.  409 00:16:31,724 --> 00:16:34,059  - YEAH.     YEAH, SHE LOOKS REALLY HAPPY.     410 00:16:34,093 --> 00:16:35,661  both:   ♪ YOU GOT IT DOWN ♪  411 00:16:35,694 --> 00:16:41,667  ♪ AND YOU'RE WELL       ON YOUR WAY TO THE TOP ♪  412 00:16:41,700 --> 00:16:44,269  ♪ BUT THERE'S SOMETHING   THAT YOU FORGOT ♪  413 00:16:44,303 --> 00:16:45,938  ♪ WHAT ABOUT LOVE? ♪  414 00:16:45,971 --> 00:16:50,242      ♪ DON'T YOU WANT SOMEONE   TO CARE ABOUT YOU? ♪  415 00:16:50,275 --> 00:16:51,844  ♪ WHAT ABOUT LOVE? ♪   - LOVE.  416 00:16:51,877 --> 00:16:56,115  both: ♪ DON'T LET IT   SLIP AWAY ♪  417 00:16:56,148 --> 00:16:58,150  ♪ WHAT ABOUT LOVE? ♪  418 00:16:58,183 --> 00:17:02,721      ♪ I ONLY WANT TO SHARE IT   WITH YOU ♪  419 00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:06,158  ♪ ♪  420 00:17:06,191 --> 00:17:09,061  [guitar solo]  421 00:17:09,094 --> 00:17:15,167  ♪ ♪  422 00:17:19,772 --> 00:17:22,908  - EXCELLENT.   - HEY, MOM.  423 00:17:22,941 --> 00:17:25,044  NICE SINGING   FOR TWO OLD LADIES.  424 00:17:25,077 --> 00:17:27,813  - OH.      I'LL TAKE THAT COMPLIMENT.  425 00:17:27,846 --> 00:17:29,148  - YOU HUNGRY?  426 00:17:29,181 --> 00:17:31,083  SPRING ROLLS,   SHUMAI DUMPLINGS,  427 00:17:31,116 --> 00:17:32,418  BUKKAKE.  428 00:17:32,451 --> 00:17:35,220      - JUST ONE MORE BUKKAKE,   AND THEN YOU HAVE TO CUT ME OFF.  429 00:17:35,254 --> 00:17:37,089  - WILL DO, MOM.  430 00:17:37,122 --> 00:17:39,658  [both snickering]  431 00:17:39,691 --> 00:17:41,360    - HEY, YOU WANT SOME BUKKAKE?     432 00:17:41,393 --> 00:17:42,761  - [laughs]  433 00:17:42,795 --> 00:17:43,862  - WHAT?  434 00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:46,331  - DO YOU KNOW   WHAT BUKKAKE IS?  435 00:17:46,365 --> 00:17:49,068  - OH, IT'S A ASIAN...  436 00:17:49,101 --> 00:17:51,770     PUFF PASTRY SORT OF THING.  437 00:17:51,804 --> 00:17:53,405  WHAT?  438 00:17:53,439 --> 00:17:55,774  - BUKKAKE IS WHERE   A GROUP OF MEN  439 00:17:55,808 --> 00:17:59,044    GET TOGETHER FOR THE PURPOSES          OF PLEASURING THEMSELVES  440 00:17:59,078 --> 00:18:00,446  ONTO A WOMAN'S FACE.  441 00:18:00,479 --> 00:18:04,049  - OH, MY GOD.  442 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,952  OH, MY GOD.   ADAM!  443 00:18:06,985 --> 00:18:09,354  BRENT, HOME.   ADAM, UP TO YOUR ROOM.  444 00:18:09,388 --> 00:18:10,622  - WHAT? WHY?  445 00:18:10,656 --> 00:18:13,592  - YOU KNOW WHY.   I'LL BUKKAKE YOU.  446 00:18:13,625 --> 00:18:14,927  - OH, GROSS.  447 00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:17,729  - UM, TECHNICALLY,   UH, YOU CAN'T.  448 00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:20,599  - I MEAN IT.   GO!  449 00:18:20,632 --> 00:18:22,768  - [laughs]  450 00:18:30,409 --> 00:18:32,144      - NICE RED LEATHER SHOES   YOU'RE WEARING.  451 00:18:32,177 --> 00:18:33,946  TELL ME, DO YOU ENJOY THINKING      ABOUT THE COW  452 00:18:33,979 --> 00:18:35,447  THAT WAS SKINNED   TO MAKE THEM,  453 00:18:35,481 --> 00:18:37,116  OR DO YOU JUST BLOCK   THAT PART OUT  454 00:18:37,149 --> 00:18:38,484  FOR THE SAKE       OF BEING FASHION-FORWARD?  455 00:18:38,517 --> 00:18:39,685  - FUCK YOU, MAN.  456 00:18:39,718 --> 00:18:41,820     - CURSE WORDS WERE INVENTED       BY PEOPLE TOO STUPID  457 00:18:41,854 --> 00:18:43,555  TO THINK      OF AN INTELLIGENT RESPONSE.      458 00:18:43,589 --> 00:18:45,524  - YOU SHOULD PRINT THAT   ON A T-SHIRT.  459 00:18:45,557 --> 00:18:48,727  - YEAH, MAYBE I WILL,   REBECCA.  460 00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:50,295  MAYBE I WILL.  461 00:18:50,329 --> 00:18:53,465  - OH, MY FUCKING GOD.   SEAN.  462 00:18:53,499 --> 00:18:55,834  LAST TIME I SAW YOU,  463 00:18:55,868 --> 00:18:57,503  YOU HAD TRADED IN   YOUR HIKING BOOTS  464 00:18:57,536 --> 00:18:59,538     FOR A PAIR OF BRUNO MAGLIS   AND WERE PULLING IN  465 00:18:59,571 --> 00:19:00,973  A VERY HEALTHY INCOME.  466 00:19:01,006 --> 00:19:02,741  - IRONICALLY,   INCOME IS ONE  467 00:19:02,774 --> 00:19:04,810  OF THE MOST      UNHEALTHY THINGS THERE IS.  468 00:19:04,843 --> 00:19:05,944  IT STARTS THE CYCLE.  469 00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:07,513  - OH.  470 00:19:07,546 --> 00:19:08,647  SO IN OTHER WORDS,  471 00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:10,415  YOUR SHORT STINT   IN THE CARE FACILITY  472 00:19:10,449 --> 00:19:12,651      AND YOUR SUBSEQUENT STAB     AT CIVILIZATION DIDN'T TAKE?      473 00:19:12,684 --> 00:19:15,654  - NOT SO MUCH.   AND WHAT ABOUT YOU?  474 00:19:15,687 --> 00:19:17,055     JUST GETTING OLD AND ANGRY,      475 00:19:17,089 --> 00:19:18,557  TRYING TO SQUEEZE   INTO CLOTHES MEANT FOR A WOMAN     476 00:19:18,590 --> 00:19:21,093  HALF YOUR AGE, BUT NOT WILLING      TO CHANGE YOUR STYLE  477 00:19:21,126 --> 00:19:23,762  UNTIL ONE OF YOUR      ONE-NIGHT STANDS PAYS OFF?  478 00:19:23,795 --> 00:19:25,063  - OH, HERE'S HOPING.  479 00:19:25,097 --> 00:19:26,932  - [scoffs]  480 00:19:26,965 --> 00:19:29,234  SO WHAT LAW FIRM     THOUGHT YOU WERE A GOOD IDEA?     481 00:19:29,268 --> 00:19:31,403  - NOT LAW FIRM, SASSY--  482 00:19:31,436 --> 00:19:32,871  PHARMACEUTICAL SALES.  483 00:19:32,905 --> 00:19:34,573     - OH, YOU'RE A DRUG PUSHER?      484 00:19:34,606 --> 00:19:37,276  - YOU DO KNOW ME.   - YEAH.  485 00:19:37,309 --> 00:19:39,811  YOU'RE THE REASON NINE-YEAR-OLD         GIRLS ARE GETTING BOOBS.  486 00:19:39,845 --> 00:19:42,047  - AND THE REASON   NINE-YEAR-OLD BOYS  487 00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:43,782  ARE THANKING ME.  488 00:19:43,815 --> 00:19:45,918  - YOU REALLY      HAVE NO CONSCIENCE, DO YOU?      489 00:19:45,951 --> 00:19:49,488  - LOOK, I HAVE A JOB   THAT IS QUESTIONABLE  490 00:19:49,521 --> 00:19:52,191  AT BEST,      BUT THEY PAY ME VERY WELL.  491 00:19:52,224 --> 00:19:54,026     AND SINCE I HAVE NO HUSBAND      492 00:19:54,059 --> 00:19:56,128  AND NO CHILDREN   TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR,  493 00:19:56,161 --> 00:19:58,463  I PAY FOR MY FATHER'S   NURSING HOME CARE,  494 00:19:58,497 --> 00:20:01,266    AND I DONATE 20% OF MY INCOME      TO CHARITY.  495 00:20:01,300 --> 00:20:04,102  MY DIME COULD BE   THE LAST DIME NEEDED  496 00:20:04,136 --> 00:20:05,204  TO HELP CURE CANCER.  497 00:20:05,237 --> 00:20:07,005  - I'D STILL ARGUE   YOU'RE AS BAD  498 00:20:07,039 --> 00:20:09,141  AS YOU ARE GOOD.  499 00:20:09,174 --> 00:20:11,009  - OH.  500 00:20:11,043 --> 00:20:14,846  I'D ARGUE THAT TOO.  501 00:20:30,562 --> 00:20:32,831  - IT LOOKED LIKE YOU WERE HAVING      A PRETTY GOOD TIME EARLIER.      502 00:20:32,864 --> 00:20:34,600  - YEAH.       AND I THINK YOU'RE RIGHT.  503 00:20:34,633 --> 00:20:36,134  I CAN HAVE IT ALL.  504 00:20:36,168 --> 00:20:37,336     SO WE'RE GONNA DO THE CAKE,      505 00:20:37,369 --> 00:20:39,171  AND THEN I'M GONNA   SHOO EVERYBODY AWAY,  506 00:20:39,204 --> 00:20:42,040    AND THEN I'M GONNA SEND ADAM       OVER TO PAUL'S.  507 00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:43,508  I FEEL LIKE   I'M IN COLLEGE,  508 00:20:43,542 --> 00:20:48,313  WHEN I DIDN'T WORRY   ABOUT CONSEQUENCES.  509 00:20:48,347 --> 00:20:50,282  - CATHY, I'M GONNA GO.  510 00:20:50,315 --> 00:20:52,417  - NOW?  511 00:20:52,451 --> 00:20:54,953  YOU WANT ME TO MEET YOU   AT THE AIRPORT?  512 00:20:54,987 --> 00:20:57,055  - I LIKE PAUL.  513 00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:58,790  - HE'S VERY LIKABLE.   - YEAH.  514 00:20:58,824 --> 00:21:00,492  HE'S FUNNY, CHARMING.  515 00:21:00,525 --> 00:21:02,194  - IF YOU TAKE PAUL   TO THE BAHAMAS,  516 00:21:02,227 --> 00:21:03,528     I'M GONNA BE VERY JEALOUS.  517 00:21:03,562 --> 00:21:06,331  - [laughs]  518 00:21:06,365 --> 00:21:08,433     LOOK, I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING       ABOUT MARRIAGE.  519 00:21:08,467 --> 00:21:10,435  I ALMOST KNOW NOTHING   ABOUT YOURS--  520 00:21:10,469 --> 00:21:11,870  WHAT WENT WRONG OR WHY,  521 00:21:11,903 --> 00:21:13,839  BUT YOU MUST HAVE SEEN   SOMETHING IN HIM ONCE.  522 00:21:13,872 --> 00:21:15,207  - YEAH.  523 00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:17,009  HE MADE ME LAUGH.  524 00:21:17,042 --> 00:21:18,644  HE WAS A GREAT DANCER.  525 00:21:18,677 --> 00:21:20,612  - AND HE THREW   A GREAT PARTY FOR YOU.  526 00:21:20,646 --> 00:21:21,880  - YEAH.  527 00:21:21,913 --> 00:21:24,583  HE WAS--HE WAS BRAGGING   ABOUT THE CAKE  528 00:21:24,616 --> 00:21:25,851  THAT HE GOT FOR ME--  529 00:21:25,884 --> 00:21:28,086  CHOCOLATE   WITH RASPBERRY FILLING.  530 00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:29,554  MY FAVORITE, HE SAID.  531 00:21:29,588 --> 00:21:31,690  - IT'S THOUGHTFUL.   - YEAH.  532 00:21:31,723 --> 00:21:33,725      EXCEPT IT'S HIS FAVORITE.  533 00:21:33,759 --> 00:21:36,995  NOW, IS THAT BECAUSE  534 00:21:37,029 --> 00:21:40,365  I NEVER SAID OUT LOUD      WHAT MY FAVORITE CAKE WAS,  535 00:21:40,399 --> 00:21:44,736     OR BECAUSE HE DIDN'T LISTEN       WHEN I SAID IT?  536 00:21:44,770 --> 00:21:47,306  I DON'T KNOW, LENNY.  537 00:21:47,339 --> 00:21:49,708  I DON'T KNOW.   - I DON'T KNOW EITHER.  538 00:21:49,741 --> 00:21:51,009  LOOK...  539 00:21:51,043 --> 00:21:53,845  I'M NOT BIG       ON GIVING PEOPLE ADVICE,  540 00:21:53,879 --> 00:21:56,682     ESPECIALLY WHEN IT BUTTS UP           AGAINST MY OWN HAPPINESS,  541 00:21:56,715 --> 00:22:00,118     BUT MAYBE YOU SHOULD SPEND   A LITTLE TIME  542 00:22:00,152 --> 00:22:03,088  MAKING SURE       THAT I'M YOUR BEST MOVE.  543 00:22:03,121 --> 00:22:05,590    AND IF YOU DECIDE THAT I AM,      544 00:22:05,624 --> 00:22:08,226  YOU CALL ME.  545 00:22:27,112 --> 00:22:30,482  [cheers and applause]  546 00:22:31,683 --> 00:22:34,853  - OH, THANK YOU.   THANK YOU, EVERYBODY.  547 00:22:34,886 --> 00:22:37,889  AND...   THANK YOU, PAUL.  548 00:22:37,923 --> 00:22:41,993     I MEAN, I-I DIDN'T KNOW IT,           BUT I REALLY NEEDED THIS.  549 00:22:42,027 --> 00:22:45,931  AND YOU HAVE MADE ME   VERY HAPPY TODAY,  550 00:22:45,964 --> 00:22:48,500     WHICH IS A REALLY BIG DEAL,      551 00:22:48,533 --> 00:22:50,135  BECAUSE I HAVE   TO TELL YOU SOMETHING.  552 00:22:50,168 --> 00:22:51,536  I--I'VE--  553 00:22:51,570 --> 00:22:55,073    YOU KNOW, I'VE JUST REALIZED       I HAVEN'T BEEN HAPPY--  554 00:22:55,107 --> 00:22:59,010  I MEAN, REALLY...  555 00:22:59,044 --> 00:23:03,648  REALLY TRULY HAPPY       IN A LONG TIME, IN YEARS,  556 00:23:03,682 --> 00:23:04,950     I MEAN, IN, LIKE, 20 YEARS,      557 00:23:04,983 --> 00:23:07,018  BECAUSE I REMEMBER,   I WAS HAPPY.  558 00:23:07,052 --> 00:23:09,621  I WAS HAPPY   WHEN REBECCA AND I--  559 00:23:09,654 --> 00:23:11,289  [laughing]   WHEN WE--  560 00:23:11,323 --> 00:23:13,191  WE BROKE       INTO THAT ICE CREAM STORE  561 00:23:13,225 --> 00:23:15,594  IN COLLEGE      IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT,      562 00:23:15,627 --> 00:23:17,929      AND WE--WE TOOK PICTURES   OF EACH OTHER  563 00:23:17,963 --> 00:23:19,398    IN OUR BRAS EATING ICE CREAM.     564 00:23:19,431 --> 00:23:20,966  I DON'T KNOW--       WHAT IS IT ABOUT COLLEGE  565 00:23:20,999 --> 00:23:23,935     THAT MAKES YOU WANT TO TAKE         YOUR SHIRT OFF ALL THE TIME?      566 00:23:23,969 --> 00:23:26,538  [laughter]   SO EVEN THOUGH I HAVE MY SHIRT--  567 00:23:26,571 --> 00:23:28,874      I MEAN, MY--MY DRESS, ON,  568 00:23:28,907 --> 00:23:31,843  UM...  569 00:23:31,877 --> 00:23:35,881  I'M AS HAPPY NOW   AS I WAS THEN.  570 00:23:35,914 --> 00:23:37,482  SO THANK YOU.  571 00:23:37,516 --> 00:23:40,218  - AW.   - THANK YOU.  572 00:23:40,252 --> 00:23:43,955  [applause]  573 00:23:43,989 --> 00:23:46,992     - I DON'T EVEN CARE, DUDE.   IT WAS WORTH IT.  574 00:23:47,025 --> 00:23:49,027  WE HAD, LIKE,   EVERYONE SAYING IT.  575 00:23:49,060 --> 00:23:51,663  I MEAN,       THEY'RE STILL EATING IT.  576 00:23:51,696 --> 00:23:53,498  [mockingly]       "OH, BUKKAKE, YUM, YUM."  577 00:23:53,532 --> 00:23:55,667  [laughs]  578 00:24:01,306 --> 00:24:03,742  WAIT.   CAN I CALL YOU BACK?  579 00:24:12,284 --> 00:24:15,086  MARLENE?  580 00:24:15,120 --> 00:24:17,656  MARLENE,   WHAT ARE YOU DOING?  581 00:24:17,689 --> 00:24:20,192  - I'M LOOKING   FOR MY DAMN HOUSE.  582 00:24:20,225 --> 00:24:21,793  I THINK   ONE OF THOSE BIG TRUCKS  583 00:24:21,827 --> 00:24:23,728  MUST HAVE PICKED UP   THE WHOLE DAMN HOUSE  584 00:24:23,762 --> 00:24:27,365  AND DROVE OFF WITH IT.  585 00:24:27,399 --> 00:24:28,934  - COME ON.  586 00:24:28,967 --> 00:24:31,870  - OH, BILL, SUSAN...  587 00:24:31,903 --> 00:24:33,305    THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING.     588 00:24:33,338 --> 00:24:35,373  HERE, HAVE A GIFT.   NO, TAKE IT.  589 00:24:35,407 --> 00:24:38,343  IT'S ALL YOURS.   ENJOY.  590 00:24:38,376 --> 00:24:39,978  OH, AUNT ALLISON.  591 00:24:40,011 --> 00:24:43,248  THANK YOU SO MUCH   FOR COMING.  592 00:24:43,281 --> 00:24:44,683  - GOOD-BYE, SWEETHEART.  593 00:24:44,716 --> 00:24:46,818  I'D SAY A GREAT TIME   WAS HAD BY ALL.  594 00:24:46,852 --> 00:24:51,189  - IT'S A PRIVILEGE   TO GROW OLD.  595 00:24:51,223 --> 00:24:53,225  HERE...  596 00:24:53,258 --> 00:24:56,027  THANKS FOR COMING.  597 00:25:08,907 --> 00:25:10,175  - ADAM.  598 00:25:10,208 --> 00:25:11,443     - MOM, I KNOW I'M GROUNDED.      599 00:25:11,476 --> 00:25:13,044  IT'S JUST--     I'M GONNA WALK MARLENE HOME.      600 00:25:13,078 --> 00:25:14,312  - OH.  601 00:25:14,346 --> 00:25:17,549  OH, WELL, THAT'S NICE.   OKAY.  602 00:25:17,582 --> 00:25:19,584  HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOM.   LOVE YOU.  603 00:25:19,651 --> 00:25:22,521  - THANK YOU, ADAM.  604 00:25:22,554 --> 00:25:24,956  YOU'RE A GOOD KID.  605 00:25:38,737 --> 00:25:41,339      - YOU HAVEN'T BEEN HAPPY   FOR 20 YEARS?  606 00:25:41,373 --> 00:25:43,742  - OH, I...  607 00:25:43,775 --> 00:25:45,644  NO, I WAS EXAGGERATING.  608 00:25:45,677 --> 00:25:47,145  - HMM.  609 00:25:47,178 --> 00:25:48,680  - IS THAT WHAT I SAID?  610 00:25:48,713 --> 00:25:50,682  - THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID.  611 00:25:50,715 --> 00:25:52,918  THAT'S BASICALLY   THE ENTIRE TIME YOU'VE KNOWN ME.  612 00:25:52,951 --> 00:25:55,220  I DON'T KNOW HOW     TO NOT TAKE THAT PERSONALLY.      613 00:25:55,253 --> 00:25:57,222     I MEAN, IF THERE'S A STRAW   FOR ME TO GRASP AT,  614 00:25:57,255 --> 00:25:58,790  I'LL GRASP AT IT.  615 00:25:58,823 --> 00:26:01,359     HELL, THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN       DOING FOR THE LAST TWO MONTHS.     616 00:26:01,393 --> 00:26:02,460  [sighs]  617 00:26:02,494 --> 00:26:04,162  - PAUL, HOW MUCH   HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING?  618 00:26:04,195 --> 00:26:06,097  - NOT ENOUGH.  619 00:26:06,131 --> 00:26:07,966  WHEN YOU KICKED ME   OUT OF THE HOUSE  620 00:26:07,999 --> 00:26:10,135      FOR PISSING ON THE LAWN,   I NEVER SHOULD HAVE SOBERED UP.    621 00:26:10,168 --> 00:26:12,571  I DEFINITELY   SHOULD'VE NEVER LEFT MY HOUSE.     622 00:26:12,604 --> 00:26:15,206  THIS IS MY HOUSE,   BY THE WAY.  623 00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:18,009  IT'S MY FUCKING HOUSE.  624 00:26:18,043 --> 00:26:19,811     I THOUGHT IT WAS OUR HOUSE.      625 00:26:19,844 --> 00:26:21,112  I THOUGHT   IT WAS OUR DREAM HOUSE,  626 00:26:21,146 --> 00:26:22,881  BUT I GUESS      I'M THE ONLY ONE DREAMING,  627 00:26:22,914 --> 00:26:24,616  BECAUSE IT'S ALL A BIG      FUCKING NIGHTMARE FOR YOU.  628 00:26:24,649 --> 00:26:27,485  YOU KNOW WHAT?       YOU SHOULD'VE MOVED OUT!  629 00:26:27,519 --> 00:26:30,655      'CAUSE THIS IS MY HOUSE.   THIS IS MY FUCKIN' FAN.  630 00:26:30,689 --> 00:26:32,591    [distorted voice] ♪ IF YOU'RE      HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT ♪  631 00:26:32,624 --> 00:26:34,025  ♪ CLAP YOUR HANDS ♪  632 00:26:34,059 --> 00:26:35,560  NOT YOU CATHY.   YOU DON'T CLAP.  633 00:26:35,594 --> 00:26:36,728  - PAUL...   - YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE?  634 00:26:36,761 --> 00:26:39,331  THIS IS MY FORK,   AND I MISS MY FORK.  635 00:26:39,364 --> 00:26:40,865  HELLO, FORK,   HOW YOU DOING?  636 00:26:40,899 --> 00:26:42,200     OH, LOOK, IT'S MY BALLOONS.      637 00:26:42,233 --> 00:26:44,336     MY FORK, MEET MY BALLOONS.  638 00:26:44,369 --> 00:26:45,971  HOW YOU DOING? NICE TO SEE YOU.     [balloons popping]  639 00:26:46,004 --> 00:26:48,039  WHAT'S UP?   MERRY CHRISTMAS.  640 00:26:48,073 --> 00:26:49,841     NICE TO MEET YOU. FUCK YOU.      641 00:26:49,874 --> 00:26:53,345  KISS MY ASS.   SUCK MY DICK. FUCK YOU.  642 00:26:53,378 --> 00:26:56,014  [woman moaning]  643 00:26:56,047 --> 00:26:59,150  [both moaning]  644 00:27:00,885 --> 00:27:02,921  - REBECCA.  645 00:27:02,954 --> 00:27:05,256  - OH, MY GOD.   CATHY.  646 00:27:05,290 --> 00:27:06,491  I--  647 00:27:06,524 --> 00:27:09,494  - IT'S NOT A GOOD TIME   TO DO LAUNDRY, SIS.  648 00:27:09,527 --> 00:27:10,929  - I--  649 00:27:10,962 --> 00:27:12,831  I'M SO SORRY.  650 00:27:12,864 --> 00:27:15,867  [balloons popping]  651 00:27:15,900 --> 00:27:20,839  [yelling indistinctly]  652 00:27:20,872 --> 00:27:23,675  [cell phone beeping]  653 00:27:23,708 --> 00:27:26,578  [yelling continues]  654 00:27:26,611 --> 00:27:31,316  - IT'S ME.   I'M COMING WITH YOU.  655 00:27:31,349 --> 00:27:34,252      [Hollywood Drunks'  Swell]  656 00:27:34,285 --> 00:27:36,354  ♪ ♪  657 00:27:36,388 --> 00:27:39,324  - ♪ MAN,   I FEEL DIFFERENT NOW ♪  658 00:27:39,357 --> 00:27:42,293  ♪ YOU PROBABLY   CAN'T EVEN TELL ♪  659 00:27:42,327 --> 00:27:44,462      ♪ WHAT'S GOT ME MOVING ♪  660 00:27:44,496 --> 00:27:47,632  ♪ AIN'T THE SAME THING   AS YEARS BEFORE ♪  661 00:27:47,666 --> 00:27:49,300  ♪ I HAD THE BIG DREAM ♪  662 00:27:49,334 --> 00:27:52,637  ♪ AND NOW IT'S EASY   TO FIGURE OUT ♪  663 00:27:52,671 --> 00:27:53,972  ♪ IT'S TOO LATE NOW ♪  664 00:27:54,005 --> 00:27:56,641  ♪ I DONE MESSED AROUND   TOO LONG ♪  665 00:27:56,675 --> 00:27:59,310  ♪ TO TURN BACK   WHAT I STARTED ♪  666 00:27:59,344 --> 00:28:02,547  ♪ BETTER FINISH IT      BEFORE I'M BROKENHEARTED ♪  667 00:28:02,580 --> 00:28:03,915  ♪ BUT HEY   DON'T GET ME WRONG ♪  80352

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