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00:00:04,380 --> 00:00:05,380
Have a java, Jerry?
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00:00:05,640 --> 00:00:06,640
Please.
3
00:00:06,900 --> 00:00:08,060
Morning, how is everyone?
4
00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:09,440
Mr. D?
5
00:00:09,560 --> 00:00:10,560
What the hell is that?
6
00:00:10,920 --> 00:00:14,820
It's a breath pump. I have an
appointment after school, so I'm just
7
00:00:14,820 --> 00:00:16,020
little snack for baby Logan.
8
00:00:16,340 --> 00:00:18,320
Aw. You're doing that in a staff room?
9
00:00:18,640 --> 00:00:19,459
Why not?
10
00:00:19,460 --> 00:00:22,200
Yeah, Jerry, why not? I happen to think
it's great that Xavier has a pump
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-positive environment.
12
00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:27,360
Disgusting. Can you do that somewhere
else? What are you, lactate intolerant?
13
00:00:28,480 --> 00:00:30,720
Look, this is a staff room, not a farm.
14
00:00:31,210 --> 00:00:33,790
With the milk being sucked out of the
teeth by a machine.
15
00:00:34,090 --> 00:00:37,130
Jerry, maybe you're not aware of the
health benefits.
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00:00:37,410 --> 00:00:39,950
Breast milk is an excellent source of
nutrition.
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00:00:40,230 --> 00:00:44,150
Vitamin C, amino acids, magnesium, love.
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00:00:44,730 --> 00:00:45,730
A little top up?
19
00:00:45,850 --> 00:00:49,890
No, no, don't do that. No, no, no, I'll
throw up. A little squirt? No, don't do
20
00:00:49,890 --> 00:00:52,150
that. Oh, God, no. No, no, no, no, no.
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00:00:52,730 --> 00:00:53,730
That's not allowed.
22
00:00:54,370 --> 00:00:55,470
Just one more little squirt.
23
00:00:56,750 --> 00:00:59,370
Thank you, my milkmaid. Oh, my God.
24
00:01:03,860 --> 00:01:05,160
What a baby.
25
00:01:05,400 --> 00:01:08,160
Are you, um, ambi -breath -drift? Like,
can you do both?
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00:01:09,120 --> 00:01:13,740
I'm awesome. No, you're not, dude. Don't
lie. I'm awesome. I'm driving around in
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00:01:13,740 --> 00:01:17,020
my mom's ride. I'm awesome. A quarter of
my life gone by.
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I'm awesome.
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00:01:23,100 --> 00:01:24,100
Heather,
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is that you? Jerry?
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What are you doing here?
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00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:30,290
Wow, I teach at... Xavier.
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Wow, that's, wow.
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00:01:33,830 --> 00:01:36,270
How long has it been since we were in a
relationship?
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We're in love.
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00:01:37,530 --> 00:01:39,510
Allie, this is Mommy's old friend, Mr.
Duncan.
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00:01:40,070 --> 00:01:41,970
Mr. Duncan, this is Allie.
38
00:01:42,810 --> 00:01:44,010
It's your first year at Xavier.
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I'm in grade five.
40
00:01:45,430 --> 00:01:47,130
Great, I didn't know you'd gotten
married.
41
00:01:47,530 --> 00:01:52,310
To my daddy, he's a soldier fighting
overseas, sacrificing. You look great. I
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00:01:52,310 --> 00:01:53,310
will say that.
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00:01:53,470 --> 00:01:54,610
We had some good times.
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00:01:54,810 --> 00:01:58,310
I think two, two times. Was it two? One
was bowling.
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00:01:58,810 --> 00:01:59,810
Bowling.
46
00:02:00,479 --> 00:02:01,520
We don't want to be late.
47
00:02:02,400 --> 00:02:04,060
Bowling. Remember what the bowling led
to?
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00:02:04,920 --> 00:02:05,920
A strike.
49
00:02:06,180 --> 00:02:09,380
Well, I'm going to school too, so I'll
have to follow you.
50
00:02:11,520 --> 00:02:12,560
Robert, are you okay?
51
00:02:12,860 --> 00:02:16,640
Just trying to get into my chess club
jacket because my high school reunion is
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00:02:16,640 --> 00:02:19,940
coming up this weekend. Robert, no one
expects you to fit into a jacket from 20
53
00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:21,220
pounds ago.
54
00:02:21,480 --> 00:02:23,300
Your chess club had a jacket?
55
00:02:23,660 --> 00:02:26,260
Yeah. Well, we were more like a gang
than a club, I guess.
56
00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:27,680
Called herself the queen.
57
00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:29,340
Look there, the thick gork.
58
00:02:29,920 --> 00:02:30,920
Wow. Pretty tough.
59
00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,220
It might be better that you don't fit
into it.
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00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:37,620
Why? I need Vanessa Mugliano to see me
in this jacket.
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00:02:37,900 --> 00:02:39,080
Oh, the one that got away.
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00:02:39,580 --> 00:02:42,200
Technically the one I never had. She
turned me down when I asked her to the
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00:02:42,200 --> 00:02:43,200
Knights and Rooks dance.
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00:02:43,300 --> 00:02:45,460
Oh, have you been carrying a torch for
her all these years?
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00:02:45,720 --> 00:02:46,539
Hell no.
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00:02:46,540 --> 00:02:50,660
I just want her to want me now so that I
can shun her back and make it even.
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00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:52,360
How do I do that?
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00:02:52,540 --> 00:02:54,380
What I find attractive is confidence.
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00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:59,500
Yeah. Well, if I had the old Callahan
bod, I'd be more confident. So which
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00:02:59,500 --> 00:03:02,880
first, the chicken or the ab, you know?
You want to lose weight? You should come
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00:03:02,880 --> 00:03:04,260
with me to hot yoga after school.
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00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:05,780
We'll do it the old -fashioned way.
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00:03:06,060 --> 00:03:09,380
We'll sweat it off. I only have a few
days of reunions this weekend. All the
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00:03:09,380 --> 00:03:11,540
more reason to get started. I'll see you
at 4 .15.
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00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:13,280
Okay.
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00:03:13,660 --> 00:03:14,660
I'm in.
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00:03:14,780 --> 00:03:15,800
Can you do me a favor?
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00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:17,500
Can you give me a hand with this jacket?
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00:03:17,740 --> 00:03:19,260
Sure. Jacket on or jacket off?
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00:03:20,780 --> 00:03:21,780
Sir.
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00:03:23,040 --> 00:03:24,860
Hey, guess who I ran into outside the
school?
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00:03:25,920 --> 00:03:26,920
Couldn't they fit in a bread box?
83
00:03:27,300 --> 00:03:30,640
No, it's a person. They can't fit in a
bread box. Tell that to Chandra Bahadur
84
00:03:30,640 --> 00:03:31,680
Dangi. Who?
85
00:03:32,060 --> 00:03:34,100
World's shortest man. 55 centimeters
tall.
86
00:03:34,360 --> 00:03:35,560
Definitely fit in a bread box.
87
00:03:35,940 --> 00:03:37,320
Probably fit a piece of bread in there,
too.
88
00:03:37,580 --> 00:03:38,580
For a blanket.
89
00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:41,140
Okay, Simon, you done? I ran into
Heather.
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00:03:41,700 --> 00:03:44,660
Heather's a girl I dated ten years ago.
How tall is she?
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00:03:44,980 --> 00:03:46,400
Would you stop thinking of the bread
box?
92
00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:48,060
Okay. What was she doing here?
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00:03:48,330 --> 00:03:51,390
Listen to this. She's got a daughter at
this school in grade five. You know how
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00:03:51,390 --> 00:03:52,390
awkward that was?
95
00:03:53,170 --> 00:03:54,770
Wait a second.
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00:03:55,190 --> 00:03:56,190
She is nine.
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00:03:57,190 --> 00:03:58,530
We dated ten years ago.
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00:03:59,010 --> 00:04:00,770
And the daughter had blonde hair, blue
eyes.
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00:04:02,590 --> 00:04:03,590
Oh, my God.
100
00:04:04,630 --> 00:04:08,230
Oh, my God. You don't think... No, I
don't think she'd fit in that bread box.
101
00:04:08,290 --> 00:04:10,910
No, not the bread box. She's more than
twice Chandra's height.
102
00:04:11,850 --> 00:04:13,130
I'd have to see her, though.
103
00:04:22,570 --> 00:04:23,289
How are you?
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00:04:23,290 --> 00:04:26,190
How would you like to support the arts
for only five bucks?
105
00:04:26,410 --> 00:04:30,190
Wow, you have a new single out. I didn't
know you'd put your band back together.
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00:04:30,430 --> 00:04:32,010
I didn't. I'm a solo act.
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00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:37,650
How many would you like? Well, I mean,
obviously, I would love one, but
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00:04:37,650 --> 00:04:42,950
unfortunately, the problem is I am not
supposed to listen to music.
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00:04:45,330 --> 00:04:46,450
Doctor's orders, though.
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00:04:47,010 --> 00:04:48,550
Nickelback ruined my eardrums.
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00:05:00,910 --> 00:05:01,709
Mm -hmm.
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00:05:01,710 --> 00:05:02,970
Turn around. Turn around.
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00:05:03,670 --> 00:05:04,670
Emma!
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00:05:05,310 --> 00:05:08,510
How would you like to hear my new song,
I'm an Original?
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00:05:08,810 --> 00:05:10,570
Well, I don't have anything to play it
on.
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00:05:14,990 --> 00:05:15,990
Here we go.
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00:05:16,670 --> 00:05:17,670
For you.
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00:05:18,450 --> 00:05:20,610
And there you are.
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00:05:21,750 --> 00:05:23,050
Thanks. Enjoy.
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00:05:25,350 --> 00:05:28,430
I'm an original, one of a kind.
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00:05:32,289 --> 00:05:35,410
You can't tell that I'm sweating, can
you? Just breathe, Robert.
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00:05:35,670 --> 00:05:36,890
My God, you are sweaty.
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00:05:37,130 --> 00:05:38,690
I can't. I feel like I'm marinating in
myself.
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00:05:39,170 --> 00:05:40,930
All right, if everyone can move to the
front of their mat.
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00:05:44,350 --> 00:05:45,850
We're going to start with a sun
salutation.
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00:05:51,470 --> 00:05:53,190
And step down into downward dog.
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00:05:57,419 --> 00:06:02,720
remembering to breathe, giving thanks
and being grateful for all that we have
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00:06:02,720 --> 00:06:03,720
life.
129
00:06:09,260 --> 00:06:10,380
I'm so deeply sorry.
130
00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:13,040
Now I'm safe.
131
00:06:13,100 --> 00:06:14,580
And now into up dog.
132
00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:20,840
I'm just going to step in and go to
warrior pose.
133
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:24,220
All right, we're moving on.
134
00:06:27,070 --> 00:06:29,630
Robert, why don't you just pass the
jacket? Take it out. I know a tailor.
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00:06:29,950 --> 00:06:30,950
It's good call.
136
00:06:33,910 --> 00:06:35,350
Yeah, I can see it.
137
00:06:35,590 --> 00:06:37,530
Same complexion, same eyes.
138
00:06:37,830 --> 00:06:39,550
Same athletic ability. Look at her.
139
00:06:40,050 --> 00:06:41,410
You know what her mother told her?
140
00:06:41,650 --> 00:06:45,630
Her father is overseas fighting in the
war. That's why he's not around.
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00:06:45,910 --> 00:06:47,530
Ugh. Classic lie.
142
00:06:47,730 --> 00:06:48,850
Oh, God. Poor kid.
143
00:06:49,640 --> 00:06:52,800
I don't know if I'm ready to be a
father, Simon. Tell that to the hundreds
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00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:57,540
kids that you teach and raise every day
at school, Jerry. You discipline them.
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00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:01,000
You watch movies with them. You come
back every September, whether you want
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00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:01,559
or not.
147
00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:03,120
And I know you don't always want to.
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00:07:04,180 --> 00:07:06,280
I'm already a dad. You're already a dad.
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00:07:06,780 --> 00:07:08,740
So much time to make up for.
150
00:07:09,300 --> 00:07:10,800
Hey, there's her mom. One sec.
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00:07:12,580 --> 00:07:13,580
Hey, Heather.
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00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,100
Hey.
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00:07:15,280 --> 00:07:18,180
Twice in one day. Well, I think it's
time we had that talk.
154
00:07:18,590 --> 00:07:19,590
What talk?
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00:07:19,770 --> 00:07:23,170
Look, I think you're doing a great job
with Allie, but don't you think it's
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00:07:23,170 --> 00:07:25,590
she had a father figure in her life? She
has a great father.
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00:07:25,810 --> 00:07:27,310
Well, thank you. I know that was hard to
say.
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00:07:28,250 --> 00:07:29,890
I'm not sure I get what you're saying.
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00:07:31,790 --> 00:07:35,050
Look, I just think it's time the three
of us sat down and discussed what
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00:07:35,050 --> 00:07:36,710
happened to us ten years ago.
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00:07:37,010 --> 00:07:39,290
Nothing happened between you and I ten
years ago.
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00:07:40,710 --> 00:07:42,610
Hi, Allie. What do you want to do for
dinner tonight?
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00:07:42,830 --> 00:07:45,430
I was thinking drive -thru.
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00:07:49,290 --> 00:07:52,590
It's okay by me. Check with your mother.
She was checking with me. Then we're
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00:07:52,590 --> 00:07:53,589
both fine with it.
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00:07:53,590 --> 00:07:54,590
Sure, Holly.
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00:07:55,030 --> 00:07:56,030
Do the right thing, Heather.
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00:07:56,350 --> 00:07:57,350
Talk to her.
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00:07:58,270 --> 00:07:59,570
Sure, Jerry. Whatever you say.
170
00:08:00,210 --> 00:08:01,210
Bye, sir.
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00:08:01,530 --> 00:08:02,990
Won't be, sir, for much longer.
172
00:08:03,690 --> 00:08:04,690
Oh,
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00:08:08,830 --> 00:08:11,770
a box of porn for me? But I didn't get
you anything.
174
00:08:12,210 --> 00:08:15,270
No, you get this filth and any other
stuff like this, she got stashed in the
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00:08:15,270 --> 00:08:16,270
house. Out of here.
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00:08:16,510 --> 00:08:18,390
Because my daughter's going to be here
every other weekend.
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00:08:18,610 --> 00:08:19,610
You still on this daughter thing?
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00:08:19,650 --> 00:08:22,410
You see, I know you don't understand
this, Bill, because you're not a father
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00:08:22,410 --> 00:08:24,150
like me. You've been a dad for like ten
minutes.
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00:08:24,570 --> 00:08:26,170
Don't tell me you made custody
arrangements already.
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00:08:26,410 --> 00:08:27,610
It's not official, but it's happening.
182
00:08:28,490 --> 00:08:31,670
You know, this could actually be good
for you. How? Because if you want to
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00:08:31,670 --> 00:08:33,610
a chick, a daughter's the way to go.
Excuse me?
184
00:08:34,169 --> 00:08:37,510
Well, having a daughter is the way to
go. Then, like, women love single dads
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00:08:37,510 --> 00:08:38,510
because they think you're responsible.
186
00:08:38,710 --> 00:08:40,130
Clearly, you are not.
187
00:08:40,470 --> 00:08:42,309
How does everything come back to dating
for you?
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00:08:42,510 --> 00:08:44,490
You're talking about me being someone's
father.
189
00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:46,560
I've created the future, Bill.
190
00:08:46,780 --> 00:08:48,580
Does your future include beer? Because
mine does.
191
00:08:49,120 --> 00:08:52,080
Yeah, another thing. The new house rules
I put a lock on the fridge at all
192
00:08:52,080 --> 00:08:53,080
times. Why?
193
00:08:53,380 --> 00:08:55,840
Because there's alcohol in there and I
don't need my 10 -year -old running
194
00:08:55,840 --> 00:08:57,820
around getting wasted with her friends.
This is bullshit.
195
00:08:58,380 --> 00:09:00,520
And no swearing in the house. Another
rule.
196
00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:03,180
This kid is ruining my life.
197
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:05,580
Well, apparently that's what kids do to
parents.
198
00:09:06,140 --> 00:09:08,340
They ruin your life. So welcome to my
world.
199
00:09:14,990 --> 00:09:15,989
How is hot yoga?
200
00:09:15,990 --> 00:09:19,050
More like hot noga. But it doesn't even
matter because I have a new plan.
201
00:09:19,990 --> 00:09:21,270
That looks really bad.
202
00:09:21,510 --> 00:09:23,810
What is it? It's a recipe I found on the
internet.
203
00:09:24,250 --> 00:09:28,630
It's water, cayenne pepper, maple syrup,
and tons of wheatgrass.
204
00:09:29,030 --> 00:09:30,030
Oh, a juice cleanse.
205
00:09:30,690 --> 00:09:35,170
Yeah. Yeah. They can be a little
intense, though, so just go easy on it.
206
00:09:39,090 --> 00:09:41,710
Liquid vitality.
207
00:09:47,190 --> 00:09:49,250
Hi. Did you talk to your mother last
night?
208
00:09:49,490 --> 00:09:51,270
Yeah. Anything you want to ask me?
209
00:09:51,730 --> 00:09:54,630
No. Look, I know this is a lot to take
in right now.
210
00:09:54,830 --> 00:09:56,850
I'll follow your lead. I'll work with
you.
211
00:09:57,550 --> 00:09:58,550
And I got you this.
212
00:09:59,710 --> 00:10:02,450
I slept with it under my pillow last
night, so it's all worked in.
213
00:10:03,250 --> 00:10:04,250
Thanks.
214
00:10:07,270 --> 00:10:10,610
You should fit your hand perfectly, too,
because it's the same size.
215
00:10:10,830 --> 00:10:11,830
Okay?
216
00:10:13,570 --> 00:10:15,590
Emma's a regional one.
217
00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:17,560
Yeah.
218
00:10:21,240 --> 00:10:24,980
What the hell is this?
219
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:27,440
It's Emma's Original.
220
00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:28,939
Right, guys?
221
00:10:28,940 --> 00:10:30,540
Emma's. No, I don't think that's right.
222
00:10:30,740 --> 00:10:33,180
Okay, well, whatever it is, it's great.
Okay, Trudy?
223
00:10:33,420 --> 00:10:34,900
Thought you couldn't listen to music.
224
00:10:35,140 --> 00:10:38,800
Yeah. You know what? The sound waves are
affecting me. Thank you. Uh -huh.
225
00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:43,520
Hey, I told you to listen to my song,
not steal it.
226
00:10:44,220 --> 00:10:45,220
Sherry?
227
00:11:05,050 --> 00:11:08,750
You just made a powerful enemy,
bookworm.
228
00:11:09,810 --> 00:11:10,810
Hey, Robert.
229
00:11:10,890 --> 00:11:12,390
What are you doing sitting in the dark?
230
00:11:12,790 --> 00:11:13,810
Turn it off.
231
00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:17,380
Turn it off. Turn it off.
232
00:11:17,940 --> 00:11:20,860
I just have a bit of a headache from
this juice cleanse.
233
00:11:21,180 --> 00:11:22,220
Oh, are you okay?
234
00:11:22,740 --> 00:11:29,700
I was just wondering if maybe we
could... Just write
235
00:11:29,700 --> 00:11:30,700
it down. Okay.
236
00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:39,320
I'll just email you.
237
00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:40,720
Okay.
238
00:11:43,560 --> 00:11:44,560
Okay.
239
00:11:45,489 --> 00:11:46,690
Where do you want me to put shelves?
240
00:11:49,070 --> 00:11:52,090
Sorry to bother you, Ms. Mason. Can I
speak to Allie for a second, please?
241
00:11:52,090 --> 00:11:53,390
in the middle of class. Can it wait?
242
00:11:53,670 --> 00:11:55,170
No, it can't wait. It's very important,
okay?
243
00:11:56,350 --> 00:11:57,350
Okay, go ahead.
244
00:11:58,730 --> 00:11:59,589
All right.
245
00:11:59,590 --> 00:12:01,610
Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.
246
00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:07,270
Allie, why didn't the baseball glove
mean something to you?
247
00:12:07,710 --> 00:12:09,030
That was supposed to be our moment.
248
00:12:09,370 --> 00:12:12,690
Has your mother not spoken to you yet?
Yeah, I talk to her every day.
249
00:12:12,930 --> 00:12:14,570
Okay, but about her and I?
250
00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:19,300
Years ago, and how serious we... All
right, here's my first parenting moment.
251
00:12:20,780 --> 00:12:21,780
Hey, remember this?
252
00:12:22,080 --> 00:12:23,680
Remember this? The ballpark? Remember?
253
00:12:24,120 --> 00:12:28,340
Yes, you do, because you did it, and
I... You don't even know you do it, like
254
00:12:28,340 --> 00:12:29,340
me. I don't know I do it.
255
00:12:29,620 --> 00:12:32,540
You have blonde hair, beautiful eyes. I
have blonde hair, beautiful eyes.
256
00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:33,840
Right? You see?
257
00:12:34,020 --> 00:12:36,260
You're not getting this. You're not
getting this.
258
00:12:55,980 --> 00:12:58,620
My dad's a soldier. He's stationed in
Darfur.
259
00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:00,980
There's no such thing as a Darfur.
260
00:13:01,540 --> 00:13:02,540
Hey.
261
00:13:03,180 --> 00:13:04,180
Hey, you.
262
00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:09,800
Do you want to go to the zoo with me
tomorrow after school?
263
00:13:10,240 --> 00:13:11,500
Do you want to do that?
264
00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:13,460
I can't. I'm busy.
265
00:13:13,700 --> 00:13:15,220
It's my birthday.
266
00:13:15,460 --> 00:13:16,319
I should know.
267
00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:17,320
I should know.
268
00:13:18,480 --> 00:13:22,460
Can I go back to class? Yeah. Hey, you
take your time. When you're ready, when
269
00:13:22,460 --> 00:13:25,280
you're ready, you let me know. You give
me a signal.
270
00:13:32,330 --> 00:13:34,990
Is that a sign, Allie?
271
00:13:36,070 --> 00:13:37,070
Allie.
272
00:13:41,890 --> 00:13:42,890
Allie.
273
00:13:45,070 --> 00:13:47,370
Robert, you need to eat something. This
isn't healthy.
274
00:13:47,590 --> 00:13:48,590
You want a sandwich?
275
00:13:48,830 --> 00:13:49,890
Sure, whatever.
276
00:13:50,250 --> 00:13:51,930
Hey, you fit in your chest jacket.
277
00:13:52,450 --> 00:13:53,289
That's great.
278
00:13:53,290 --> 00:13:56,150
I don't know why it's such a big deal,
Lisa, because I'm not even going to my
279
00:13:56,150 --> 00:13:57,150
stupid reunion.
280
00:13:57,530 --> 00:13:59,670
What? Robert, you have to go.
281
00:13:59,890 --> 00:14:03,580
You've got to go and press... Vanessa
Mugliano.
282
00:14:04,340 --> 00:14:06,520
Oh, wow.
283
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:10,180
You look, you look cleansed.
284
00:14:10,500 --> 00:14:15,240
It's just the toxins evicting themselves
from the shoddy tenement that is my
285
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:18,160
face. Oh, it's what's on the inside that
counts, right?
286
00:14:18,420 --> 00:14:21,800
Yeah, this used to be on the inside.
Does that count?
287
00:14:22,440 --> 00:14:26,280
I can try to help. I got makeup.
288
00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:27,560
Really?
289
00:14:28,180 --> 00:14:29,180
Yeah.
290
00:14:31,150 --> 00:14:32,670
That's her, my little birthday girl.
291
00:14:32,910 --> 00:14:33,910
How old is she turning?
292
00:14:34,670 --> 00:14:36,770
Nine, ten, eleven, something in there.
293
00:14:37,650 --> 00:14:43,090
Now she loves softball. So when she sees
I brought a national team member, she's
294
00:14:43,090 --> 00:14:45,330
going to love me even more. It's quite
the birthday gift.
295
00:14:46,290 --> 00:14:47,290
Here we go.
296
00:14:52,290 --> 00:14:53,290
Allie.
297
00:15:08,460 --> 00:15:11,500
I'm Dana Plaxton, and we're live for
heartwarming homecomings week.
298
00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:12,819
Isn't this wonderful?
299
00:15:12,820 --> 00:15:16,060
What's going on? He wanted to surprise
her. He just flew in from Darfur.
300
00:15:16,340 --> 00:15:17,340
Oh, that's ridiculous.
301
00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:19,040
Duncan, what are you doing?
302
00:15:19,900 --> 00:15:22,480
Excuse me. Can I ask you to just sort of
stand away there?
303
00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:24,400
What do you mean?
304
00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:30,160
Jerry! Get away from my daughter. Who
the hell are you? Stand down, soldier.
305
00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:32,200
He's some guy that I dated years ago.
306
00:15:32,460 --> 00:15:34,080
He told me that he was my dad.
307
00:15:34,380 --> 00:15:35,960
You said what to my little girl?
308
00:15:36,190 --> 00:15:39,110
We're not sure it's your little girl,
Captain Highliner, because we've got
309
00:15:39,110 --> 00:15:40,790
new developments since you've been gone
fishing.
310
00:15:41,170 --> 00:15:44,210
Are you getting this? We haven't found
out anything new, Jerry.
311
00:15:44,430 --> 00:15:45,430
Just get out of here.
312
00:15:45,530 --> 00:15:46,650
Give me a second here, Allie.
313
00:15:47,850 --> 00:15:49,690
I am so... All right, have some
competition.
314
00:15:50,330 --> 00:15:51,330
I'm going to give you your glove.
315
00:15:51,490 --> 00:15:54,450
No. Let me give her your glove. Why it's
a glove? No.
316
00:15:55,430 --> 00:15:56,430
Why do I have you here?
317
00:15:56,530 --> 00:15:57,530
I have no idea.
318
00:16:02,010 --> 00:16:05,810
All right, everybody calm down. Duncan,
explain yourself.
319
00:16:06,190 --> 00:16:08,710
All right, fine. First of all, thank you
for your service over in Dubai.
320
00:16:09,090 --> 00:16:10,830
Darfur. Same thing.
321
00:16:11,310 --> 00:16:16,130
I know this is a shock to you to come
here and realize that I am Ali's father.
322
00:16:16,390 --> 00:16:20,810
I get that. I'm sorry you found out this
way. I'm sorry you weren't told.
323
00:16:21,390 --> 00:16:25,930
But I still appreciate what you do for
our country. I appreciate you protecting
324
00:16:25,930 --> 00:16:28,390
me and my daughter. What is he talking
about?
325
00:16:28,870 --> 00:16:30,370
Ignore him. He's an idiot.
326
00:16:31,110 --> 00:16:32,250
Oh, my God.
327
00:16:33,020 --> 00:16:34,600
Allie is not your daughter.
328
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:36,520
There's no chance of that. None.
329
00:16:36,760 --> 00:16:38,060
When are you going to stop lying,
Heather?
330
00:16:38,620 --> 00:16:41,640
When are you going to admit it and face
up to it? Because I remember that night.
331
00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:45,340
I remember the bullying because I went
home. I wrote down the date, and I
332
00:16:45,340 --> 00:16:48,140
figured out everything. And I said, I
wonder if I'm going to have a child with
333
00:16:48,140 --> 00:16:51,360
this woman. And I counted the days, and
you were ovulating. You were ovulating
334
00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:53,700
because I remember you said the word,
and that's the first time I heard the
335
00:16:53,700 --> 00:16:57,000
word. And I knew it, and I knew this
could happen. And then you just
336
00:16:57,000 --> 00:17:00,240
forever, and you never told me. I know
that's our daughter. I know it is.
337
00:17:03,970 --> 00:17:05,510
Jerry, we went out twice.
338
00:17:06,069 --> 00:17:07,950
And also, I used protection.
339
00:17:08,329 --> 00:17:09,390
I used three lines.
340
00:17:09,970 --> 00:17:10,970
What are three kinds?
341
00:17:11,349 --> 00:17:12,349
Well, it's gone.
342
00:17:12,390 --> 00:17:13,990
Right? Pillow and sponge.
343
00:17:14,230 --> 00:17:15,069
And the sponge.
344
00:17:15,069 --> 00:17:18,990
You also had to use the sponge. Because
it would have been so bad if I got you
345
00:17:18,990 --> 00:17:23,069
pregnant. We're back for a very special
and very confusing heartwarming
346
00:17:23,069 --> 00:17:28,670
homecoming. So, to be clear here, you
are Allie's mother, and this is
347
00:17:28,670 --> 00:17:30,010
Nothing. Allie's nothing.
348
00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:32,130
I see. And now, who are you?
349
00:17:32,700 --> 00:17:36,560
Oh, I'm Jenna Kyra. I'm a pitcher for
the Canadian National Softball Team.
350
00:17:36,780 --> 00:17:39,460
Fantastic. And a waste of money, because
she did nothing.
351
00:17:40,100 --> 00:17:41,100
Okay.
352
00:17:42,720 --> 00:17:48,880
Just a reminder, student council meeting
at lunch one day.
353
00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:50,560
So you're coming?
354
00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:55,780
Rumors are abounding about beautiful
music erupting from your mouth. I could
355
00:17:55,780 --> 00:17:57,220
give you a private concert right now.
356
00:17:57,440 --> 00:17:58,440
Please.
357
00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:00,240
Reward my ears with velveteen.
358
00:18:02,280 --> 00:18:05,560
I'm an original one of a kind.
359
00:18:05,940 --> 00:18:09,500
I'm as original as you're gonna find.
360
00:18:10,020 --> 00:18:13,380
I dance to the beat of my own drum.
361
00:18:13,740 --> 00:18:17,200
I'm as original as they come.
362
00:18:17,880 --> 00:18:21,420
I dance to the beat of my own drum.
363
00:18:21,820 --> 00:18:25,200
I'm as original as they come.
364
00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:28,480
I'm as original as you're gonna find.
365
00:18:33,960 --> 00:18:35,240
I knew this day would arrive.
366
00:18:35,940 --> 00:18:38,040
The music, she has died.
367
00:18:43,840 --> 00:18:47,760
Vanessa Mugliano.
368
00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:50,000
Oh, my God, you look great.
369
00:18:50,420 --> 00:18:51,720
Oh, you cut your hair.
370
00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:54,460
It's so good to see you, Rhonda.
371
00:18:57,300 --> 00:18:58,300
Rhonda?
372
00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:04,760
What are you doing?
373
00:19:05,160 --> 00:19:06,160
Nothing.
374
00:19:06,780 --> 00:19:08,480
Is that the heartwarming homecomings
again?
375
00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:12,320
Yes. Dude, you gotta stop torturing
yourself.
376
00:19:12,800 --> 00:19:15,480
Think about the money you saved. No
orthodontist, no university.
377
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:16,920
Her teeth were straight.
378
00:19:17,080 --> 00:19:18,200
She wasn't that bright.
379
00:19:18,420 --> 00:19:19,460
It wasn't gonna cost me anything.
380
00:19:19,660 --> 00:19:20,439
Come on, man.
381
00:19:20,440 --> 00:19:21,940
I gotta go out. Come with me. We'll meet
some girls.
382
00:19:22,140 --> 00:19:25,480
I'm not in the mood to meet girls. I
just lost my daughter. They would love
383
00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:26,479
that.
384
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:29,500
You're just saying that to cheer me up.
Come on, man. Maybe you gotta go
385
00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:30,500
pregnant tonight.
386
00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:32,900
I guess life goes on, right?
387
00:19:34,860 --> 00:19:38,040
Let's go. Yeah. Hey, tell me how a
sponge works so I know.
388
00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:42,160
Come on, Simon. Hurry up.
389
00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:43,800
Come
390
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:51,240
on.
391
00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:53,860
Good job, Jerry. I like that. Come on. I
like that.
392
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:57,000
Give him something he can work with.
Don't encourage him. He's awful.
393
00:19:57,320 --> 00:19:58,360
You think it's that easy?
394
00:19:58,660 --> 00:20:00,040
To him? Yes, I do.
395
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:04,160
Okay. Well, how about I pitch to you and
you step in the box and...
396
00:20:04,650 --> 00:20:05,569
It's that easy.
397
00:20:05,570 --> 00:20:06,890
Okay. Girl pitcher.
398
00:20:07,110 --> 00:20:08,110
Girl pitcher.
399
00:20:08,350 --> 00:20:10,170
Girl throwing. Girl throwing.
400
00:20:10,470 --> 00:20:11,470
It's coming.
401
00:20:11,730 --> 00:20:13,990
Good luck out there.
402
00:20:14,190 --> 00:20:15,190
Good hustle, Simon.
403
00:20:15,650 --> 00:20:17,970
Stay right at second base. As far as you
can.
404
00:20:19,950 --> 00:20:21,710
Simon. Further, Simon.
405
00:20:21,910 --> 00:20:22,910
Take it back.
406
00:20:51,470 --> 00:20:52,470
so I can hit it.
407
00:20:54,270 --> 00:20:57,490
What the hell was that?
31383
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