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John Jones.
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Dr. Klein.
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H .H.
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Klein. Hospitals, give me the creeps.
Oh, come on. Think of a hospital as a
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place where people work tirelessly and
selflessly to perform miracles.
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Damn,
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I was this close.
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How long is Dan going to be here? About
two weeks.
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You mean he's going to have to spend his
birthday alone?
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Oh, Dan won't be alone.
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He'll be surrounded by... people on the
go.
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Come on.
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Dan?
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Oh, my God, we're too late.
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we were right on time.
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I want to thank you for your assistance
in the OR.
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Your performance was magnificent, nurse.
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By the way, you can get dressed now.
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This hospital is woefully understaffed.
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Billy, I want you back in that bed and I
want you to stay there.
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Do you understand what that means?
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I won't be assisting with rounds.
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Give me the reflex hammer.
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And the stethoscope.
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And the reflector.
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Mine.
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You've got to be kidding.
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Unfortunately, he's not.
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Who are you people?
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We're his friends.
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My condolences.
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Mr. Fielding, I want you in that bed.
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Alone.
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You're the best.
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Silly. I'm quite all right. I don't need
this ridiculous operation.
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What are you going to say when your
ulcer perforates and you start
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Does he always behave like a complete
ass?
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Oh, yes.
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Thank you.
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Can you cover for me a neuro?
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Your surgery's at seven.
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God, I can't wait.
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Okay, come on.
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Where are my birthday presents?
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Bulls.
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You shouldn't have.
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I figured you'd have some spare time on
your hands.
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Death be not proud.
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Dan, you're going to be just fine.
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I can feel it. Well, thank you. Of
course you can feel it. I mean, it's a
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-established procedure. A lot of guys
have little alter operations.
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Dan, we know just how much guts this is
taking.
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About two feet, from what I understand.
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Come on, what do you say, huh?
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A little seven -card stud.
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Jack's a wild, low card, pick your hole,
huh?
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Oh, come on, you in or what?
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Dan, you can't behave like this.
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You're in a hospital. You have to follow
your doctor's orders and you have to
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get complete rest.
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I'm in.
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Now, the staff of this hospital has a
first -class reputation.
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I mean, what's the worst thing that
could happen?
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I'm here to take D. Fielding to the
morgue.
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Okay, what's the second worst thing that
could happen?
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Mr. Fielding is alive.
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Look here, buddy. I'm breathing over
here.
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This poses a problem.
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Obviously, there's been some kind of
mistake.
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Ain't no mistake. I got the paperwork
right here.
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Sorry, Dan. I tried my best.
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He's here for a simple operation.
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I'll check back later.
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Over my dead body. It's a date.
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Make sure you give my regards to the
lovely Mrs. Dracula.
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Think you know something I don't?
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Oh, Dan, don't be ridiculous. What are
the odds of something going wrong, huh?
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Probably the same odds as stepping off
the curb, getting hit by a bus.
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So, what do you plan to do with this
watch?
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Sir, oh, sir, sir.
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I took this around to everybody on the
floor.
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You want to sign it? What is it? A card
wishing Dan a prompt and painless
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recovery. But there are no signatures.
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Like I said, a card wishing Dan a prompt
and painless recovery.
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Here are those files you requested, Your
Honor. Thanks.
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Alphabetized.
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With little red tags marking points of
interest.
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Gee, neat.
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May I say something else?
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Though I'm just subbing here at the
assistant DA, it's been a pleasure
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with you.
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Yeah, well... It's been a pleasure
working with all of you.
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Mac.
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Christine.
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Of course, Roz.
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That's all I have to say.
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Real nice guy.
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Yep. Very polite.
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Yep. Kind of makes me want to barf.
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Yep.
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What's next, Mac?
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Dansky versus Rosenstein?
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Oh, isn't that the pooper scooper case?
Uh -huh.
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Mac, have you seen the evidence?
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Hey, I tagged it.
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Stay that one till after lunch. I'm with
you, sir. What else? People versus
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green. Here's the file.
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Well, not wishing to prejudge any case,
what is the specific charge against
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Sister Ralph?
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He was apprehended in front of St.
Paddy's attempting to solicit funds for
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home for wayward brunettes.
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Defense pleads guilty, Your Honor.
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And the state appreciates that plea from
the lovely and able public defender.
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Thank you.
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You're very, very welcome.
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Let's make that a $50 fine, and Ralph,
don't let this kind of thing become a
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habit.
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Ross.
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Let's move it, sister.
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Hey!
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Respect the uniform, if not the man.
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I hated you in Norma Rae.
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Hi, everybody.
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Dan Fielding, what the hell are you
doing here? You're supposed to be in the
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hospital. Hey, why hang around that
dump, huh? I'm fine.
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Come on.
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Come on. No,
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I'm okay. I'm okay, okay. I just tripped
over a gum wrapper.
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Walker? They didn't want him to leave
the hospital so early. They insisted he
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use this.
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Give it to me.
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Let me get to my desk.
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Take your time, Dan.
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And... Watch out for the...
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Thank you, sir.
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Looks like you're in a little discomfort
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there, buddy.
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Buddy?
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Did you say buddy?
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Who the hell are you? I am Albert
Rogers, the assistant DA temporarily
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to this courtroom.
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Get out.
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No, you see... I was... No, you see, I
am the district attorney around here.
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But I was told... I don't care what you
were told.
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Yeah, but you see, I was... Hill!
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Scalpel!
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Sir, if you're absolutely sure, you
won't be needing me.
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Dan, you think you can work?
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Sir, I assure you, I can do this.
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Well, I guess we won't be needing you,
Mr. Rogers.
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That's right. Go back to your
neighborhood, Mr. Rogers.
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You think you can do that?
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Paul, if we need you to come back. It
would be a great pleasure.
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I knew he was going to say that.
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May I say you're looking lovely this
evening?
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I can break cinder blocks with my
forehead.
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May I say goodbye?
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All right, let's get back to work, Matt.
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Yes, sir.
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Dan, what can you possibly do in this
condition?
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Try me.
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You might be surprised.
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We're already here, people.
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Dan?
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Coming, sir.
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Dan?
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Might I suggest a medicated shampoo?
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What's the matter?
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I think I'm gonna sneeze.
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So?
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Stitches, woman, stitches.
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What happens to be sneezes?
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You ever see the movie Alien?
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You got it.
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Dan, are you sure we shouldn't just call
Mr.
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Rogers back? Sir, I'm fine.
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I am completely capable of performing my
duties.
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Let's give it a shot, Matt.
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People versus Barbarella.
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Oh,
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Phil! My pills!
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Whatever you do, don't look directly at
her.
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What's the charge here, Mr.
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Prosecutor? Oh, I need my file, sir.
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I'll put it on your table.
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If you can't discharge the duties of
your job, then you really have no place
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here in the courtroom.
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All right. All right. I'll get it.
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Ever have one of those days?
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Come on, guys. Let's go cheer up Dan.
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Hey, how you doing, pal?
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If I had a gun, I would shoot you.
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Almost back to normal.
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Would you look at him?
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Do I have to?
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Gee, Dan.
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How do you eat with that thing sticking
up your nose?
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This is how I eat.
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I'm getting kind of full. Somebody want
to finish my carrots?
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Oh, no thanks.
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We sucked up dinner before we came.
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So I hear you're going to be just fine.
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That's what they tell me.
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No reason for them to lie.
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Unless you're desperately and hopelessly
ill.
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Hello.
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Oh, took a turn for the worse, did we?
You, get the hell out.
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00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:12,160
Hey, didn't anybody tell you it's not
polite to talk with your nose full?
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00:14:14,280 --> 00:14:18,980
Dan, what is going on with you? Listen,
if you don't mind... Well, Dan, we do
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00:14:18,980 --> 00:14:22,540
mind. Why did you come back to work
early? Why are you risking your health?
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00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:24,060
Because he's nuts.
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00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:30,640
How are you feeling, Mr. Fielding? I am
in great pain.
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00:14:31,140 --> 00:14:32,140
Good.
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00:14:33,620 --> 00:14:34,720
Oral? Yes.
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00:14:35,360 --> 00:14:36,360
Disappointed?
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00:14:40,460 --> 00:14:42,040
Now, you have a very stupid friend here.
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00:14:42,360 --> 00:14:43,360
Oh, yes.
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Thank you.
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Doesn't seem to understand he's a very
sick man.
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00:14:48,580 --> 00:14:52,340
You know, Fielding, it's my obligation
to do everything I can to ensure your
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recovery. That's part of my Hippocratic
oath.
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That's the canon of dignity and mercy we
doctors hold sacred.
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Will you be my friend?
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00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:07,940
Now, where was I?
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Dignity and mercy?
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00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:11,599
Oh, yes.
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00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:14,840
I want to talk to the duty nurse about
your enema. I'm not going to pay for any
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00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:15,840
enema.
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My treat.
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Well, we'll be going.
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00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:23,760
What, so soon?
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00:15:23,800 --> 00:15:26,540
You don't want to stick around for
dessert? We're going to be inhaling some
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00:15:26,540 --> 00:15:27,540
baked Alaska.
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00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:31,980
Dan, you're not going to listen to the
doctor. You're going to listen to me. If
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00:15:31,980 --> 00:15:33,680
you don't slow down, you're going to
die.
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00:15:34,180 --> 00:15:36,080
Now, what do I have to do to keep you in
bed?
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00:15:40,170 --> 00:15:41,170
We gotta be going now.
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00:15:42,090 --> 00:15:43,290
Well, Dan, you know what they say.
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As long as you got your health.
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Or insurance.
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Bye. Bye, Dan.
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I'll catch up with you guys downstairs.
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00:15:54,750 --> 00:15:57,630
Change your mind about dessert, Harry?
I'll call up for an extra tube.
244
00:15:59,290 --> 00:16:01,350
Dan, can I say something to you in
confidence?
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00:16:01,610 --> 00:16:03,190
Of course, sir. You're a jerk.
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00:16:04,090 --> 00:16:05,450
Your secret is safe with me.
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00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:10,340
Something is making you act this way.
What is it? What was that thing about
248
00:16:10,340 --> 00:16:13,560
getting back to work so quick? Are you
afraid your job's going to be taken away
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00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:17,480
from you? Hey, listen. You want to watch
a little TV with me? Dan, I want to
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00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:18,480
talk to you.
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00:16:18,720 --> 00:16:21,540
Petty co -junction. Highly underrated as
far as I'm concerned.
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00:16:22,220 --> 00:16:23,220
Dan.
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00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:26,760
Now, something is making you act
recklessly.
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00:16:27,540 --> 00:16:28,539
What is it?
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00:16:28,540 --> 00:16:32,420
Have you got some kind of repressed
emotional conflict that you're afraid to
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look at?
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00:16:33,620 --> 00:16:34,620
Listen to yourself.
258
00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:36,100
Who the hell do you think you are?
259
00:16:37,580 --> 00:16:38,519
analyzing everybody.
260
00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:41,080
Dan. Do you remember that dream I told
you about me being chased by the giant
261
00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:44,440
cucumbers through the Grand Canyon? You
thought that had sexual overtones.
262
00:16:47,060 --> 00:16:51,020
Dan, I am real concerned about you as a
friend.
263
00:16:52,260 --> 00:16:53,260
Friend?
264
00:16:57,520 --> 00:17:00,640
Dan, I want to talk to you. I don't want
to talk to you.
265
00:17:01,200 --> 00:17:02,340
I am not going to listen.
266
00:17:02,700 --> 00:17:06,510
Has it ever occurred to you? to you that
the only reason I ever listen to you is
267
00:17:06,510 --> 00:17:08,790
because it is my job. I have to.
268
00:17:12,369 --> 00:17:14,390
I'm afraid visiting hours are over.
269
00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:18,970
Yeah.
270
00:17:22,130 --> 00:17:23,430
Happy birthday, Dan.
271
00:17:31,310 --> 00:17:33,650
I'll be back in a half an hour. What
for?
272
00:17:34,930 --> 00:17:36,630
Your sponge bath.
273
00:17:38,950 --> 00:17:42,550
I have an itsy bitsy sponge.
274
00:17:43,090 --> 00:17:44,090
Ha!
275
00:17:46,550 --> 00:17:47,550
Dan?
276
00:17:53,890 --> 00:17:55,330
Are you lonely?
277
00:18:02,030 --> 00:18:04,010
Next time, it won't be empty.
278
00:18:08,730 --> 00:18:09,730
Hi,
279
00:18:10,890 --> 00:18:11,890
Dan.
280
00:18:14,290 --> 00:18:15,290
Sheila.
281
00:18:15,830 --> 00:18:18,930
Dan, I came as soon as I heard.
282
00:18:21,150 --> 00:18:22,590
Where did you get the uniform?
283
00:18:24,610 --> 00:18:26,910
I used to be a candy striper.
284
00:18:28,230 --> 00:18:30,770
I get off on...
285
00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:36,620
Mercy. So, what brings you by?
286
00:18:38,020 --> 00:18:39,020
Gifts.
287
00:18:40,360 --> 00:18:41,380
Little kibitzing.
288
00:18:43,140 --> 00:18:47,500
You know, it's very strange. I wonder
why is it that the only time you show up
289
00:18:47,500 --> 00:18:49,920
in my life is when I'm ill or
incapacitated.
290
00:18:51,020 --> 00:18:52,020
Luck.
291
00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:54,720
Dan, I want you.
292
00:18:55,590 --> 00:18:58,310
I want you like never before.
293
00:18:58,730 --> 00:19:02,150
Chill, chill. This is a hospital. I've
got wires attached to my body monitoring
294
00:19:02,150 --> 00:19:04,910
my vital signs. I've got a tube running
up my nose.
295
00:19:05,610 --> 00:19:08,070
I sense reluctance.
296
00:19:09,690 --> 00:19:12,410
Reluctance? Don't you understand the
meaning of the word restraint?
297
00:19:13,330 --> 00:19:15,410
A device that restricts movement.
298
00:19:17,070 --> 00:19:19,570
Oh, this is wonderful.
299
00:19:22,670 --> 00:19:24,050
Is this available in King?
300
00:19:25,030 --> 00:19:27,570
Sheila, I can barely move.
301
00:19:28,230 --> 00:19:29,490
I understand.
302
00:19:31,490 --> 00:19:32,490
I'll drive.
303
00:19:35,750 --> 00:19:37,210
I want you.
304
00:19:37,830 --> 00:19:39,490
I want you now.
305
00:19:39,790 --> 00:19:44,030
Sheila, listen, this is my life. We're
talking about my life. Are you so driven
306
00:19:44,030 --> 00:19:47,230
by pathological need that you would put
it at risk just to satisfy your tawdry
307
00:19:47,230 --> 00:19:48,230
kick?
308
00:19:48,490 --> 00:19:49,550
Should I stop?
309
00:19:50,230 --> 00:19:51,230
No!
310
00:19:54,370 --> 00:19:56,330
No. Where was I?
311
00:19:56,850 --> 00:20:00,430
Dan, I want you. I want you now.
312
00:20:01,490 --> 00:20:02,530
Thank you.
313
00:20:03,050 --> 00:20:04,330
Don't mention it.
314
00:20:05,230 --> 00:20:06,410
Come here, Dan.
315
00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:09,750
Coming.
316
00:20:11,630 --> 00:20:15,870
Now, open your mouth and say...
317
00:20:24,010 --> 00:20:25,010
Hello, Station 9.
318
00:20:27,230 --> 00:20:28,690
What's going on in your room?
319
00:20:30,210 --> 00:20:34,110
Mr. Feldman, you were just having a
dream.
320
00:20:34,790 --> 00:20:36,570
Now go back to sleep.
321
00:20:38,810 --> 00:20:41,950
No, I will not be your friend.
322
00:21:09,930 --> 00:21:12,870
treated me like scum. Why in the world
would I want to see him again?
323
00:21:13,470 --> 00:21:14,590
To watch him suffer?
324
00:21:16,570 --> 00:21:17,570
Good enough for me.
325
00:21:18,710 --> 00:21:21,270
It's Dan's birthday, so everybody put on
your hats.
326
00:21:23,610 --> 00:21:26,090
Why are we doing this?
327
00:21:30,230 --> 00:21:33,590
Dan is sick and we have to cheer him up.
Does that mean we have to humiliate
328
00:21:33,590 --> 00:21:34,590
ourselves?
329
00:21:35,250 --> 00:21:36,530
Yeah, I'm pretty sure it does.
330
00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:43,600
That's going to be a problem.
331
00:21:55,960 --> 00:22:01,760
Sorry I'm late.
332
00:22:02,980 --> 00:22:05,960
There was a puddle on the corner and I
got suctioned to the pavement for a
333
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:06,960
while.
334
00:22:07,940 --> 00:22:09,640
Well, why are you wearing that costume?
335
00:22:10,200 --> 00:22:11,200
Because it's Saturday.
336
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:15,100
It's always nice to flip out of the
uniform on weekends.
337
00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:17,860
Getting something a little more
comfortable.
338
00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:21,700
I entertain kids at the orphanage on
Saturdays.
339
00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:24,100
Children just love this get -up.
340
00:22:29,020 --> 00:22:30,060
A little advice.
341
00:22:31,460 --> 00:22:34,540
Change your shoes before you get stuck
in front of a bus.
24666
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