All language subtitles for Rostered.On.S01E01.Just.Turn.the.Dial.Down.WEBRip.x264-ION10

[electronic music playing]

I hate being late for work...

not because I think it's
important to be at work on time,

but because I have to pretend
that I'm sorry to be late,

which I'm not.

[theme music playing]

Oh, you know what else?

My roster says
this shift starts at 8:50

so I'm here in time
for a staff meeting,

but I don't actually get paid
till 9:00.

[theme music continues]

-So my day consists of--
-[man] Hey, Shauny!

-Here we go.
-[laughs]

-Hey, mate.
-Hey!

Hey, are you alright?

You've been late a lot lately.

Yeah. Look, Gary,
I'm really sorry about that.

I got caught behind an accident.

You should leave early
to avoid things like that.

And then if you
get into work early,

you can set your department up,

start the day with a bang,
brother!

-Bang.
-[laughs]

I kinda wanted to
bring that up with you.

Yeah.

'Cause we don't actually
get paid until 9:00.

Mate, mate, look,
head office make the rules.

Now, I'm workin' on it.
I'm on your side.

Believe me. I'm workin' on it.

Yeah, but you're still
enforcing it, though. You--

Shaun, I like you, mate.
I really do.

Your product knowledge
is fantastic.

You're great with the customers,

but more so,
you're one of the bros, bro.

One of the bros.

But, mate, we're a team here.

I've got to make sure

that we are all travelling in
the same direction.

[imitates jet engine]

Anyway, look, forget about that.

What have you got planned
for the weekend?

-A bit of a quiet one.
-Perfect.

I'll need you for Sunday.

Brett's got something on,
so... you cool?

Oh...

-Yeah, yeah. Should be good.
-[laughs] Legend!

Pound it.

Legend! [laughs]

Now, mate, get out there
and have a huge one.

[laughs] Good on ya, mate.

Damn it! Happens every time.

Rule number one of retail,

always have something planned,

otherwise they'll assume
you can work.

-OK, so my day consists of--
-[man] Shaun.

Damn it.

Mate...

uh, what's going on
with you lately, hm?

Third time you've been late
this week.

Yeah, sorry,
I got caught behind an accident.

Well, mate, you should leave
with enough time to compensate

if something like that happens,
and if you do get here early--

Oh, I can just work for free for
half an hour till 9:00am, yeah?

Wow. Uh...

Don't know what to say.

-Yeah, but it's true, isn't it?
-Mate, I'm just like you.

You know, we're a team.

-And, you know, head office--
-Oh, my gosh.

Do you guys work off a script
or what?

Look, mate, Gary and I go in to
bat for you guys all the time,

but head office make the rules.

You know, I've been where you are,
but I put my head down,

I worked my arse off
and look at me now.

2-fuckin'-IC.

Yep.

OK, mate,
just get here on time, mate.

You know that
floor manager job's comin' up

and, uh, you're looking good
for it.

Also, I'd hate to have to
discipline ya.

Discipline me?
What, are you joking or...?

No, if I had to, I would.

I mean, for your own good.

Adam, your job description is
exactly the same as mine

except for you get keys
to close the store

and you've gotta do some filing.

Mate, that's it.

Regardless, you can't...

You can't discipline
a grown man.

Shaun, I'm beggin' ya,

please don't make me
discipline you.

I like you.

Try it. Go on. Honestly.

On thin ice, Shaun. Thin ice.

Adam, ladies and gentlemen.

Great. So, where was I?
Oh, that's right. My day.

My day consists of
pacing these aisles, smiling

and selling things to people,

which usually looks like this.

What's your best price on this?

-What's your best price on this?
-Can you do any better for cash?

-Can you do any better for cash?
-Come on, mate.

I've seen this way cheaper
down the road.

I've seen it way cheaper
than that.

I do spend a lot of money here.

It's 50 bucks cheaper
down the road.

-Can you hurry up?
-Mum!

OK, you get the idea.

Now there's the staff.

Like all retail stores,

we have a full range
of alpha-male salesmen,

bitchy counter girls
and incompetent managers.

This is my nine-to-five,

day in, day out.

Welcome to Electroworld,

or, as I like to call it...

hell.

-Excuse me?
-Yes, hello.

-How are you today?
-Do you work here?

I've been standing here
for half an hour now.

Yes, I do work here.
And are you sure about that?

Because I was behind here
about 10 minutes ago.

-Are you calling me a liar?
-No, not at all.

I was merely stating the fact

that maybe you overestimated
the amount of time

that you were waiting here.

But, look, I'm sorry.
How can I help you?

Hm. I'd like to return
this camera, please.

Yeah, OK.

Yep. I can help you with that.
What seems to be the problem?

It doesn't take good pictures.

How so? It's actually
a really good camera.

All the photos come out blurry
and some are dark.

Right. What were you
taking photos of?

My husband and I went away
for a weekend

and I was trying to take lots
of photos as we drove around

and it all looked terrible.

OK, so when you say
"driving around",

you mean you would drive,
stop, take a photo?

No, we didn't have time
to get out all the time.

What, so you were taking photos
when you were driving?

While my husband drove, yes.

Right, that seems to be
the problem.

It's really hard to hold these
still while you're driving

and get a clear picture.

The camera's not faulty.

Plus, the car's moving as well.

You'd be struggling to get
a good shot without a DSLR.

Look, I know how to use a camera
and this one isn't working.

OK.

-Smile.
-[camera shutter clicks]

Look at that. See?

Clearly in focus.

Well, that only happens
sometimes.

Regardless, I want a refund.

It didn't work for the purpose
I bought it for.

Look, I'm really sorry,

but we can't give you a refund
unless it's faulty.

-It takes blurry pictures.
-No, no, no.

Remember,
I just took a photo of you.

You just can't take a photo
out of a moving vehicle

and expect it to be in focus.

Well, that's false advertising,
then.

Where did it say that
on the box?

Well, the list of things
it can't do

are much longer than
what it can do.

How do you mean?

Well, I mean
they're not gonna list

all the things that it can't do.

You know,
you don't buy a toaster

and then they put
on the packaging,

"This toaster won't
turn into a car."

-Now you're talking nonsense.
-No, I'm not.

I'm stating a fact.

I'm really sorry,
but we can't return this

'cause it's not faulty.

I'll take a credit note, then.

It's the same rules apply,
sorry.

I'd like to speak to
the manager, please.

Yep. OK.

I'll see if he's available.

Hey, have a good one, mate.

Hey, good one
getting that warranty.

Sleep soundly
knowing you're covered.

-Brett.
-Winno, you bastard.

-How are ya?
-Brett, hey.

So, uh, you got any girls
on the go at the moment?

'Course I do, mate.

What do you think I do at night,

bloody pull my dick
or something?

Ha-ha! Good one, Brett.
Yeah, yeah. I mean,

I know you were trying to pick
up girls here around the store

so I thought
you might have been single.

Mate, I'm in
my prime fuckin' years, son.

You know, seriously,
I can go out, right,

and the young chotch, they think
I'm like, this cool older bloke.

I mean, you know, not so old
that I'm a dirty old bastard,

but I'm young enough
that the old MILFs,

they wanna ride me like
a fucking stallion, Winno.

Like a fuckin' stallion.

So, Brett, uh,
what's your strategy, then?

Mate, just fuckin'
take 'em out the back

and tell 'em
you wanna smash 'em.

-For reals?
-Yeah, they love that.

-They don't even get offended?
-Oh, well, some do.

But they're not gonna suck you
off in the dunnies, are they?

-So, who cares?
-What, and that's it?

Mate, I don't know. I'm usually
pinging off me head, bro.

Wait, is that what you said to...
to Tess?

Mate, just told her
every single shift,

I wanna take her out the back
and smash her.

And then on the Christmas party,
yeah.

And Tess went up for it?
Seriously?

Oh, mate. Did she ever.

She wanted me to bend her over
in the toilets.

-[grunts and chuckles]
-Seriously?

-Tess? Seriously?!
-Oh, look, mate, I think...

I think I know what this is
about, and the answer is yes.

Sorry. Sorry. Sorry, Brett.
Sorry, what?

Yes, the Brettinator
will be your wingman.

Yes, we're gonna go out
and get smashed

and yes, you're gonna drain
those little balls, mate.

Just ask if you wanna party,
bro.

Um, no, no, no, that's not
what I was getting at.

I'm, uh, pretty busy anyway
on the weekend.

-Oh, yeah? Yeah, busy when?
-Uh...

Pff-tt-tt-tt. Uh, Friday.

[laughs]
I was gonna say Saturday.

Sucked in, dickhead. It's on.

Don't be such a pussy.

You know what, Brett? Yes.

Yes, we can go out and yes, yes,
yes, I will learn your style.

Attaboy.

Hey, can you look after TVs
for a sec?

I gotta go snap off a deuce.

[clears throat] Alright.

Um, sorry, did I just overhear
you and Brett

making plans to hang out
on Saturday?

Uh... Uh... Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, actually. We're, um...

We're going out to the clubs

and we're going to, um, smash,
uh, like, rivers of bitches.

-[chuckles] OK, what are you doing?
-Why are you laughing?

This whole attitude
just doesn't suit you.

This is the new me, Tess.

I don't see
what's wrong with that.

What are you trying to achieve
with your new dickhead persona?

I don't know, Tess.

I mean, it got Brett
into your pants,

so, uh,
maybe I'll get lucky too.

-Tess, I...
-Maybe you'll get lucky?

Good one, dickhead. You
and Brett deserve each other.

Tess... Tess...

[sighs]

-Hey, Shauny boy.
-Hey.

How are you, mate?
What's going on?

That lady with the camera?

She's got no receipt, no box
and she still wants a refund.

Well, is it in good condition?
Is it still working?

Yes! It's ridiculous.

Look, just return it,
keep her happy.

-What?
-Just return it, keep her happy.

Yeah? No big deal.

But that's not policy, mate.

I pretty much told her
there was no way.

Yeah, but, look, I just want us
to keep the reputation

of being nice guys.

Like Brett?

Number one sales guy
right there.

Thanks, mate.

Finally! Well, how did you go?

Well, I spoke to the manager

and he said just this once,
he's happy to give you a refund.

-I knew it.
-Can you just grab--

Lucky you spoke to him.

It's incredible, the trouble you have to
go to, to get good service.

Yeah, OK, cool.
Can you just grab--

Huffing and puffing
won't do anything,

and you're lucky I don't get
your manager out here and--

Will you shut up?

I'm just following
the same rules as everyone else.

I thought this job
was gonna be easy,

but it's people like you
who think they're royalty

who pooped out a couple of kids

and been on this earth
20 years longer than me

who complicate things.

-Well, I...
-"Well, I..."

Blah, blah, blah, blah. What?

You think 'cause I'm wearing
this polo shirt

and there's a desk between us
that, what,

you have this magical power that
excuses you from being a bitch?

Why don't you leave your camera,

go to the front desk
and fuck off.

I'm in trouble.

What the fuck is this shit?

It's a return. Come on, mate.

Please don't break my balls.
It's Gary's orders, mate.

Yeah, where's the box
and the receipt?

Darren, I'm telling you,
it's Gary's orders.

Oh. Gary's orders.

Don't bring this shit in here,
Shaun!

I know you guys like to prance
around out there in fairy land.

Well, in here,
the real deal, mate,

we've actually got work to do.

I can't send it back
without a receipt.

No, no, no, you don't have to
send it back. It's not faulty.

All you have to do is
put it through the system

and then put it back on
the shelves.

Shaun, why would you bring me
a camera that's not broken?

I mean, I like ya, mate,
but are you retarded?

I-I just need to return it.
Can you just return it?

-Yeah, but it's not broken!
-I know it's not broken!

I've been busting my arse for
the last hour with this shit.

Can you just return it
and put it through the system?

Yeah, no.

No, if Gary authorised it,
then he can deal with it.

Darren! Darren!

OK, have a great day.

-See you later.
-[phone rings]

-Beeanka, can you just get that?
-Sure.

Welcome to Electroworld.
This is Beeanka.

How may I direct your call?

OK, I'll put you through to
someone in that department now.

Oh, my God. What a bitch?

-Were you here for that?
-No! What happened?

Tess was standing at
the registers,

not doing anything again,
and the phone rings

and she's all, "Oh, Beeanka,
can you get the phone?"

Like she thinks she's better
than me or something.

Oh, my God!
She did that to me yesterday!

Who the hell
does she think she is?

I'm gonna say something to her.

She walks around here
like she owns the place

and no one says anything,
but I see right through her.

And not to mention,

she's all over every single guy
in the store.

[scoffs] I know.
It's disgusting.

Like, seriously,
I think she has a problem.

It's like she thinks
she owns you,

and I'm just here, like,

"Excuse me, but did you buy me?

Like, did you buy me off my
parents and I didn't know? No?

Well, lose the attitude, bitch,

because no one owns me,
so I can't be bought.

I will never be bought."

I reckon she's one of those
fat bitches in high school

that gets skinny
and then she just thinks

that she can talk to anyone
however she likes.

She's gonna come at me,
she better be ready for war.

I swear,
when she comes back out...

[Tess] Ow.

-Oh, my God! Are you OK?
-I just cut my finger a bit.

Oh, let me see.
You need to be careful, babe.

Yeah, well, it's fine, honestly.

But, like, I'm sorry if I felt
a little bit pushy before.

I just.. I really needed to pee

and so I didn't really wanna
get stuck on the phone,

so thank God
she was there to save me.

[laughs]

What? Oh, you mean
the phone thing?

Oh, don't be silly, babe.
My God, no.

As if I'd think
anything like that.

OK, good. Well, I just wanted
to make sure, but

I just need to get a bandaid.
So I'll just be back in a second.

Yeah, it's fine. Take your time.
It's quiet anyway.

[Tess] Thanks.

-Oh. My. God.
-I know.

What a suck-up!

She so clearly
saw us talking about her

and made up this elaborate
scheme to lie her way out of it.

I know!

I don't know about you,
but I did not see any blood

when she hurt herself.

She must have planned
this whole thing

just to feel like
she had one up on me.

Pathetic.

-It's a Margherita.
-Mmm.

-It's from Italy.
-They're good, aren't they?

Yeah, you've just got a bit
of... Can I just...?

-Mm. Mmm.
-[knocking on door]

-Here he is now.
-Shaun, mate.

-[Shaun] Hey.
-I've been looking for you.

Gary, hey. I won't be long.

I was hoping I could leave
the camera here.

Darren said he'd slit my throat
and bone it if I left it there.

Darren's the least of
your worries, mate.

Sorry, are we role-playing a bad
cop movie from the '80s or...?

-No.
-OK, that's awkward.

Shaun, what happened today
with that woman is unacceptable.

I was shocked,
but more disappointed.

-You heard.
-Everyone heard.

Gary, if you're gonna drill me
about this, can he not be here?

He has to be here, Shaun,
to witness.

-Witness what?
-It's strike one.

We've got you this time.
I told you, you were on thin ice.

What is he even talkin' about?

I have to give you
a written warning.

-Seriously?
-That's your first of three.

Three written warnings
is instant dismissal.

Well, what do you want me to do?

-We all have to sign.
-Gladly.

Just there where it says
'Shaun'.

Yes. Thank you, Adam.

-OK, there. Done. Happy?
-Pretty much.

Oh, I want you to write a
apology letter to the lady.

No.

It's non-negotiable, Shaun.

Gary, this is bullshit.
I'm not apologising to her.

She was a crusty old bitch.

You should be glad this is
all you're getting, mate.

Adam, Adam, can I ask you
a serious question?

-Fire away.
-Why do you even care?

This has got nothing
to do with you, mate.

Because you're poisoning
my store

and soiling the good name
of my company.

You don't actually own
this company.

Neither do I, neither does Gary.

Gary runs it, so I understand
why he's pissed off,

but you, I think you're just
trying to create a bit of drama.

Shaun, it's Adam's store.

It's your store.
It's all our store.

What does that even mean?
How is it my store?

Would I be getting a written
warning if it was my store?

Gary, you really effed me
in the butt today.

I was following store procedure
and you told me to break it,

and I was exercising
a human right

to not get treated like
a pile of poop.

And now... now you want me
to apologise to her?

And you hit me with
all this teamwork crap?

Yeah, man. Cool team!

Brother,
I know it looks like that,

and I do apologise,

but there's some good news
coming out of this.

Head office still likes you for
that promotion that's coming up.

-Are you serious?
-Look, everyone has off days.

Everyone.

If you apologise,
all will be forgotten,

and you'll be moving up
the chain of command, mate.

Yep.

Are we good, mate? My man.

There it is.

Oh. Oh, hoo!

Sorry to get so fired up.

I just...

I guess I'm just passionate
about my team and my bros.

You know all brothers get into
scraps, don't they, Gary?

Yeah, I guess it's just part of
being in a family, eh?

Anyway. Look,
it's almost knock-off time.

What do you say, mate?

Can you whip up
that apology letter tonight

and bring it in tomorrow?

Yes.

Good man! Good man!

[Gary] Good on you, mate.
Fantastic, Shauny.

See you, Shauny. [chuckles]

[sighs]

I gotta tell you, mate,

I hate the feeling before
these heavy meetings.

I love it afterwards when you
get it all out in the open.

-Makes you feel so much better.
-I know what you mean.

I feel... [shivers] Yeah.

Good on you, mate. [chuckles]

-[chair squeaks]
-Mmm.

[sighs]

Mmm.

[reflective music playing]

Oh, yeah, I get it.
I know what you're saying.

If I hate my job that much,
why don't I just leave?

Why bitch about something
that I do nothin' about?

I don't leave because
I have no qualifications

or experience
in any other field.

It's not as if I could just go out

and get myself an awesome job.

I'm stuck there and I hate it.

But at least it keeps a roof
over my family's head.