All language subtitles for Whos The Boss s05e22 Tony Does Golf

There's a time for love and a time for
living. Take a chance and face the wind.

Open road and a road that's hidden.
Brand new life around the bend.

There were times I lost a dream or two.

Found a trail and at the end was you.

There's a path you take and a path not
taken.

Choice is up to you, my friend.

Not so long, but you might awaken to a
brand new life.

Brand new life. A brand new life built
round the bend.

Mother, I thought we were going to the
club tonight for the charity dinner. Why

aren't you dressed?

I decided not to go.

Why didn't you tell me?

I decided not to tell you.

I'd pay $50 for your ticket.

I sold it for $100.

You'll be dining with Ed Strohmeyer of
New Haven.

How did you get him to pay $100 for the
ticket?

I told him you were loose.

Ho!

The golf meister is home.

What is it with you? You have spent
every spare minute on the golf course

lately. Mona, there's nothing like it.
You swing a little stick and try to hit

little ball and make it go into a little
hole, and then you do a little curse

when that little sucker doesn't go in.

God,

what a great sport.

Well, good night. Good night?

It's only 8 .30.

I know, I know, but you know, I tee off
at the crack of dawn, and that means I

have to be up about an hour before the
crack.

How does she play golf at a decent hour?
Angela, Angela, it's a public golf

course. You know what I mean? Public.

That means first come, first serve. And
I don't want to get stuck behind the

Tannenbaum sisters.

Muriel keeps trying to get me in a sand
trap.

Well,

Ed Strohmeyer of New Haven, you better
be cute.

Tony.

Tony.

What are you doing?

I'm giving Tony something he's wanted
for a long time.

May I watch?

He's not even so peacefully.

Tony. Tony, wake up. What? Why, what?

Tony, I have something for you.

I don't want it.

That sounds all too familiar, doesn't
it, dear?

Jerk. It's hot.

Hot.

Oh.

A membership to the Long Ridge Country
Club.

That's nice, Angela.

See? It has a world -class golf course.

Angela, I love you.

This was a good seat.

Oh, Tony, see,

now you don't have to get up at the
crack of dawn to play at the public

Angela, this is a very exclusive club.
Yeah, when I saw that it was first prize

at the raffle tonight, I bought 30
tickets just for you. Oh, Angela, thank

so much. I'm so happy.

I'm going to be hobnobbing with the
elite and the wealthy there. You know,

doctors, lawyers, jaguar mechanics.

You are moving. up in the world. You no
longer have to play with Dave the barber

and Ray the butcher.

Oh, yeah.

Gee, I didn't think of that.

I mean, we did have some fun.

Tony, you can invite them to the club to
play with you.

Are you kidding? I don't want them slugs
embarrassing me.

Oh,

good. You're finally here.

Okay. So, towels, colognes, hair dryers,
combs.

But first, let's clean the sinks.

Clean the sinks? Is this the way you
treat all new members?

New member?

I'm so sorry.

I'm waiting for my assistant to show,
and I thought... No, no, no.

You didn't think.

No, I didn't.

You know, I love bullying the help.

Anyway, no, I'm just kidding. I'm just
kidding. I'm just role -playing.

Hey. Oh, I get it. You're the guy who
won the raffle.

That's me. And I am here to play golf,
so could you show me my locker, please?

Okay.

Here we are.

Oh. Oh, wait a minute.

Minelli? That's not Minelli. It's
Maselli.

Minelli, Maselli. What's the difference?
You got in for free.

I'll have that fixed for you, sir. Thank
you.

Oh, hi.

Tony Maselli, new member. Nice to meet
you.

The guy that won the raffle, right?

Yeah, well, there goes the country club.

Oh, no.

Welcome aboard.

Sidney Caldwell. Oh, well, pleasure to
meet you, Sidney. Maybe we can play

sometime, huh?

Yeah, right.

So far, the sink guy's the high point.

Hi.

You're new here, aren't you?

Yeah, I'm the raffle guy.

Minnelli. Are you any relation to...
Yeah, I'm Judy's other kid.

No, no, it's Miss Ellie. Tony, that's a
misprint.

Lowell Michaels.

Welcome to the club.

Oh, thanks, Lowell. Thank you.

Hey, Lowell, wow.

That's some set of golf clubs. You must
be some serious golfer, huh?

Well, let me put it this way.

When I die, I want my ashes put in a
golf bag.

I'm serious.

You play much?

Well, I just started playing again, but
I work myself back to a 10 handicap.

I'm impressed.

Speaking of impressed, I can't believe
I'm here.

You know, when I was a kid, I used to
have to jump the fence to get into the

country club. Me too.

No. Yeah.

Yeah, we were so poor, I used to collect
lost golf balls.

Me too.

No. Yeah.

I used to sell them back to the pro shop
for 25 cents a dozen.

You too?

Actually, I sold them right back to the
players. Cut out the middleman and made

a buck a dozen.

That's how I started in the sporting
business.

Me too.

Really? No, but we were on such a good
roll.

Hey, Lou.

Where's Jim?

I don't know. I think it's just going to
be the three of us.

Well, we got a fourth right here. Right,
Tony?

Oh, well, shucks, guys. I don't know.
You know, I'm new around here. I don't

want to impose.

And you guys have probably been playing
together for years.

Can I drive the cart?

Does Sid usually drive?

Good.

I'm hungry. When's dinner going to be
ready?

Your whining is making my teeth itch.

You're stirring too much. Is it done
yet?

Yes, it is done.

The old Duffer is a happy Duffer.

He's a grateful Duffer, and you know
why?

Because he's got the most thoughtful
boss in the whole wide world.

Oh, Tony.

You're right.

How was your first day at the club? Oh,
Angela, I played my best golf of my

whole life, and I made a new friend.

Oh, is he in your grade? Is his death
next to yours?

No, but his locker is.

And guess what, Angela? He invited me to
be his partner in the Founders

Tournament this Sunday.

This will be the first trophy I don't
have to chip in for myself.

Tony, tell me about your new buddy.
What's his name? His name is Lowell

Michaels. Lowell Michaels?

Yeah, yeah.

A handsome, distinguished man?

Uh -huh, uh -huh.

Do you know him? No, but I want to.

Me first, me first.

Tony, he owns the biggest sporting goods
company in the country.

The biggest?

Sheesh. And to think it all started with
stolen golf balls.

He's looking for a new advertising
agency. Everyone in town is after him,

including me.

Boy, if I could get the inside track on
that account, I'd...

I'd like to wish you both good luck in
the tournament.

See, Angela, you know, I'd introduce
you, but I barely know myself. Tony,

don't give it a second thought. I was
just thinking out loud.

Okay, Angela.

Well... I think I'll go upstairs and
practice my putts.

Cut out the middleman. I could have been
a conglomerate.

Jack Nicklaus and Lee Trevino are
already in the clubhouse awaiting the

of Maselli's game.

If Maselli sinks this putt, he will win
$250 ,000 and a trophy he does not have

to chip in for.

Oh, wow.

Ah, well.

Who needs $250 ,000 anyway?

I just blow it on plaid pants.

Hi, there.

Well, welcome to Augusta.

So, wasn't it wonderful of Angela to
give you that membership?

Oh, Mona, she's the best.

So, have you thought about how you're
going to thank her? Oh, yeah, well, I

thinking about getting her some flowers.
Oh, flowers are nice, but they die.

So why not give her the gift that keeps
on giving, like a $40 million account?

Come on, Mona. I just met Lowell. I
don't want him to think I'm taking

of him. Tony, it's done all the time.

How do you think Sears met Roebuck?
Baskin met Robin?

Abbott and Costello met Frankenstein?

Mona, what, on a golf course?

Tony, look, Angela is too proud to say
anything, but...

Lately, business has been going... How
shall I say?

Really, Moon? I didn't know that.

Well, let me put it this way, Tony.

If things don't get better soon, there
may not be a Christmas.

Oh, gee, I had no idea it was that bad.
I mean, I...

I'd love to help Angela, but I just met
Lo. I don't want him to think I'm trying

to move in on him so fast. I mean, and
besides, you know, he was the only guy

that club that put himself out for me.

And another thing, he is a friend.

Oh?

And Angela isn't your friend?

You all... That was the worst round I've
had in two years.

That was the worst round I had in two
years.

So between the two of us, that's the
worst round we've had in four years.

You know, Lowell, we know it's not
whether you win or lose, but how you

game. But, gosh, I hate to lose.

I hate losing worse.

Well, you're right. You're a worse loser
than me.

Hey, guys, collection time.

Oh.

Hey, A -plus games, fellas.

Yeah, yeah, heck of a round there,
Peter, heck of a round. Hey, by the way,

Peter, you know, you have a really sweet
swing. What is your secret?

I inherited $20 million and have nothing
to do with my time but practice.

I should have done that.

Come on, same time, same tea, same
humiliation.

I wouldn't miss it for the world, huh?

All right, we'll get him tomorrow.

Okay.

Lowell, I have something that I maybe,
you know, sort of want to ask you. Yeah,

what's up? See, I have this friend, and
she's a good friend of mine. Excuse me.

Mr. Michael?

My name is Wally Malone.

My company handles a wide variety of
accounting software for a large

corporation. Mr.

Malone, call me at my office. See, this
is my recreation time, and I make it a

point never to mix business and
pleasure.

All right. I figured as long as we were
both here, we might have a shot at it.

Look, can I make it clearer?

I don't do business at the club.

Sorry.

What is it you wanted to ask me, Tony?

Oh, no, nothing.

Never mind, Lowell.

And Angela isn't your friend?

Lowell.

Look, I feel funny doing this, but you
see, I have this friend, friend, friend,

Angela Bauer, and she owns the Bauer
Agency.

And I'm not being biased here, but she's
the best advertising executive on the

block. So what I was thinking is maybe I
could put a meeting together between

you and you don't like to talk business
at the club.

Getting your friend this meeting really
means a lot to you, doesn't it? Oh,

yeah, well, it does.

Let's do it. Tuesday, 2 .30.

You mean it? Yeah. Really? That's right.
Boy, you are the greatest.

You are right, man.

Hey, now, look, about the tournament.

You know, I was thinking, I think I'll
get some new shoes, you know, because

the guys, they have the ones with the
tassels. You know, I like the way the

tassels... What?

What?

John, you just heard me say that I never
like to mix business and pleasure,

right?

Uh -huh. And you and I just did
business.

Uh -huh.

Well, let's keep it purely... On that
basis.

Uh -huh.

I feel more comfortable with another
partner for the tournament.

Oh, but wait a minute. Well, I... Gotta
go.

Well, it's the golfmeister.

Hi.

What's the matter?

You nervous about the tourney tomorrow?

There is no tourney tomorrow.

I did something I knew I shouldn't have.

You told that stupid joke about the pig
with the wooden leg?

No, Mona, worse than that. I listened to
you.

No, the pig joke is worse.

Mother, what did you do?

She convinced me to talk to Lowell about
getting you that meeting, which I did.

He said Tuesday at 2 .30. He did?

Noel, Noel.

And then he said he didn't want me to be
his partner in the tournament.

Oh, no.

Yeah, so now I got no friend.

I got no tournament.

I'm a man without a country club.

Oh, Tony, I'm so sorry.

That's all right. Hey, there's plenty of
other guys I could hang out with, you

know? I think I'll go see if Jonathan
wants to do something.

He's out with a friend.

Oh, well, uh, Samantha?

Oh, she's out, too.

Oh, well, then I guess it's just me and
my MTV.

Didn't have the heart to tell him the
cable was out.

Hey,

look, Lowell, I didn't sleep much last
night. I just want to tell you that I'm

sorry I crossed over the line yesterday.

Oh, it's okay, Tony.

I mean, you were the only guy who was
nice to me in a place where I felt so

of place, you know. That's enough, Tony.

And I didn't give you half the respect
you were giving me, you know.

Damn!

Why do you have to be such a nice guy?

Well, I can't help it.

I'm just lovable.

I wasn't honest with you.

I dropped you because Peter's a better
golfer. And I wanted to win the

tournament. I just used that business
about business and pleasure.

To weasel out of it.

Well, that's great.

What's great?

You're a bigger creep than me.

Excuse me.

Wait a minute. Aren't you Ed
Strohmeyer's chick?

Ed? Oh, Ed from the charity. Party
dinner.

No, actually, we're just good friends.
That's right.

Say, you're the one who gave Tony
Maselli the membership.

So then you're his babe.

Not exactly. I'm here to speak to Lowell
Michaels.

Boy, do you get around.

Any chance for me?

One in a bazillion.

Great. I thought I had no chance.

Could you get Lowell? Michaels, I really
need to speak to him.

Sure.

Boy, that was a lousy thing he did to
your friend, Tony.

Dropping him for that other guy.

Dropping him for what?

Well, I heard that Lowell really wanted
that. So the farmer says, when a pig's

that good, you don't want to eat him all
at once.

It just works every time.

Lowell Michaels, I have a bone to pick
with you.

Angela, Angela, what are you doing in
here?

you further humiliation, Tony. And what
a fine job you're doing, Angela.

She's a building inspector.

Did you or did you not dump Tony for
another man?

If you mean Peter, yes.

Angela, please. Tony, he didn't dump you
because you talk business. He used it

as an excuse to get a better golf
partner.

Angela. Tony, please.

You don't care about my friend.

You only care about yourself.

Well, you know something, pal?

I don't care about you or your $40
million account.

In fact, I wouldn't take it if you got
down on your knees and begged.

How do you like them apples?

Angela, Lowell told me why he dropped
me. He apologized, and I'm okay with it.

2 .30 is still good.

I wouldn't dare say no.

I'm such a fool. I can't believe what I
just did.

Angela, I can't believe what you just
did either.

Wait a minute.

You just risked a $40 million account
for me.

It was worth it.

Gee, Angela, I feel terrific.

But Angela, the next time you want to
spare me some humiliation, I mean, a

to the wise, you know, get your facts
straight and think before you speak and

try not to do it in a room full of naked
men.

Once again, we're at the last toll of
the mountain.

Metelli is one put away from golf
immortality.

A hush falls over the crowd.

Oh, it was good, Ange. It was good.

And I made a new friend, this guy Derek.
He's a Jaguar mechanic.

Derek? Derek is not just a Jaguar
mechanic. He is the best Jaguar

Tony, do you think that maybe you could
talk to him more?