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1
00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:17,200
There's a time for love and a time for
living. Take a chance and face the wind.
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00:00:17,640 --> 00:00:23,220
An open road and a road that's hidden. A
brand new life of time for being.
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00:00:23,740 --> 00:00:28,520
There were times I lost a dream or two.
4
00:00:29,580 --> 00:00:34,540
Found a trail and at the end was you.
5
00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:38,580
There's a path you take and a path not
taken.
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00:00:38,940 --> 00:00:41,160
The choice is up to you, my friend.
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00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:45,900
Not so long, but you're not awake to a
brand new life.
8
00:00:46,140 --> 00:00:49,620
Brand new life. A brand new life for
ground.
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00:00:51,620 --> 00:00:52,620
One,
10
00:01:01,380 --> 00:01:03,320
two, three, four.
11
00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:05,000
Let's go.
12
00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:06,200
Pelvic thrust.
13
00:01:08,810 --> 00:01:09,910
You think she's cute?
14
00:01:10,890 --> 00:01:15,590
Only in that perky, incredibly healthy,
18 -year -old kind of way.
15
00:01:16,310 --> 00:01:17,430
Come on, people.
16
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Feel the burn.
17
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If I keep working out, I'm going to look
like that, too.
18
00:01:23,730 --> 00:01:24,730
Hey,
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I feel the burn. Good.
20
00:01:28,410 --> 00:01:30,530
Hey, look who I picked up at the mall.
21
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I hope it's not a man.
22
00:01:32,150 --> 00:01:33,810
No, it's just me, Mr. Masali.
23
00:01:34,590 --> 00:01:35,590
Hi, Nathan.
24
00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:37,399
Hi, Mrs. Bauer.
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No, no, no, Mason, Mason, no need to
bow.
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You're looking great, Mrs. Bauer. Oh,
thank you, Mason.
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Do I look 18?
28
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You're looking great, Mrs. Bauer.
29
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So, Mason, tell me, tell me, what did my
favorite boy genius do over the
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00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:53,720
semester break?
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00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:57,960
Wait till you hear. Tell him, Mason,
tell him. Well, I had three migraine
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headaches. Oh, and then last Thursday I
ate a pineapple, had an allergic
33
00:02:01,080 --> 00:02:02,720
reaction, and blew up like a balloon.
34
00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:04,940
I hate when that happens.
35
00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:10,880
Not that. He got a part -time job in the
history department as a teaching
36
00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:12,720
assistant. Way to go, mate.
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00:02:12,940 --> 00:02:15,580
Can you imagine me, a college professor?
38
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I just hope I can handle it. Sure you
can handle it. What are you kidding me?
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You're young. You're bright.
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00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:21,840
You're young.
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00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:23,780
You sure you can handle this?
42
00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:26,280
Of course he can handle it.
43
00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:30,940
You know, Mozart started composing by
age five, and Charlotte Bronte had
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22 novels by age 13.
45
00:02:33,230 --> 00:02:34,330
Boy, I'm really behind.
46
00:02:36,370 --> 00:02:38,570
Wait till you hear who's in his class.
47
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He's an older student. His goal this
semester is to be on the dean's list.
48
00:02:43,450 --> 00:02:45,830
He's attractive. He's handsome. Hold it,
hold it.
49
00:02:46,190 --> 00:02:49,130
Are you teaching my history of Western
civilization class?
50
00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:52,690
Yeah. The handsome part gave it away.
51
00:02:54,110 --> 00:02:55,970
I thought it was the older part.
52
00:02:58,710 --> 00:03:04,240
Mason, this is great. Mason, I'm so
happy. You at the blackboard, me at the
53
00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:06,380
desk. Nothing could please me more.
54
00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:09,740
Really? No, but it never hurts to suck
up to the teach.
55
00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:18,600
Hi.
56
00:03:24,720 --> 00:03:25,920
Excuse me, ma 'am.
57
00:03:26,420 --> 00:03:29,140
Is this the discussion group for Western
Civ 105?
58
00:03:30,180 --> 00:03:31,180
Yes.
59
00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:34,660
I'm a little nervous. This is my first
day.
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00:03:35,480 --> 00:03:36,480
Who cares?
61
00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:39,560
Hello there, Professor.
62
00:03:39,780 --> 00:03:40,900
How are you today?
63
00:03:41,120 --> 00:03:44,160
Gee, I hope you're loaded with answers
because I'm loaded with questions.
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00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:45,939
You're Mr.
65
00:03:45,940 --> 00:03:47,260
Peter? That's my prof.
66
00:03:47,660 --> 00:03:50,660
But you're so boyishly handsome.
67
00:03:53,580 --> 00:03:54,580
article you wrote on the Corinthians?
68
00:03:54,660 --> 00:03:58,120
I thought it was absolutely brilliant. I
am a great admirer.
69
00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:00,000
Who cares?
70
00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:06,060
This is it, Tony. A teacher is born.
71
00:04:06,320 --> 00:04:11,380
Hello, Mr. Chips. Good afternoon, class.
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My name is Mason Peters.
73
00:04:28,270 --> 00:04:29,910
Little buddy, wake up, little buddy,
wake up.
74
00:04:31,130 --> 00:04:32,130
Rosebud.
75
00:04:36,090 --> 00:04:37,090
Mother,
76
00:04:40,910 --> 00:04:44,570
come on. Come on, do this exercise tape
with me. Come on, you'll have more
77
00:04:44,570 --> 00:04:47,390
energy, you'll be more creative, and
you'll be able to work a whole lot
78
00:04:47,510 --> 00:04:48,790
Get that thing away from me.
79
00:04:50,490 --> 00:04:51,630
Hey, hey, hey, no, no.
80
00:04:52,910 --> 00:04:57,070
I'm working out. No, no, no, no. These
are for Mason. You brought your teacher
81
00:04:57,070 --> 00:05:00,010
home? Well, actually, I carried him
home.
82
00:05:00,230 --> 00:05:02,070
He fainted in front of the class.
83
00:05:04,630 --> 00:05:09,310
He told
84
00:05:09,310 --> 00:05:15,790
them. Oh, Mason, I'm sorry. I
85
00:05:15,790 --> 00:05:17,350
know we shouldn't laugh.
86
00:05:27,109 --> 00:05:29,670
Mason, Mason, don't be embarrassed.
87
00:05:30,170 --> 00:05:33,810
Fainting is just your body's way of
saying it's time to lie down.
88
00:05:36,010 --> 00:05:40,930
I don't know. Maybe I'm just not
equipped to handle the intense, nerve
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00:05:40,930 --> 00:05:41,970
pressures of this job.
90
00:05:42,370 --> 00:05:46,230
Come on, Mason, lighten up. You're
teaching a history class, not leading an
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00:05:46,230 --> 00:05:49,650
expedition down a snake river. Oh, don't
say snake, Mr. Maselli. They give me
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00:05:49,650 --> 00:05:53,530
the creeps. They're so long and
slithery. I don't know. It's probably
93
00:05:57,320 --> 00:06:00,660
Hey, Siggy, come on, man, lighten up
with the neurosis stuff. We've just got
94
00:06:00,660 --> 00:06:03,900
get you over your stage fright thing.
Oh, it's easy for you to say, Tony. You
95
00:06:03,900 --> 00:06:05,780
have a commanding, charming presence.
96
00:06:06,140 --> 00:06:07,140
Well, it's true.
97
00:06:08,460 --> 00:06:12,780
But listen, you too can have a charming,
commanding presence. Listen, try this.
98
00:06:13,020 --> 00:06:16,820
You're up at the podium, right? And you
look out into a sea, a sea of strange
99
00:06:16,820 --> 00:06:23,280
faces. What you do is you look for one
face, that one accessible, open face
100
00:06:23,280 --> 00:06:25,840
says... Teach me. Talk to me.
101
00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:27,040
Call on me.
102
00:06:27,700 --> 00:06:28,700
You think?
103
00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:30,540
Is this an open face?
104
00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:35,060
Very.
105
00:06:35,280 --> 00:06:39,000
I guess I can give it a try. All right.
Now, you see? And there's a lot of other
106
00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:40,000
tricks you can do, too.
107
00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:42,140
Angela, you must have a tip or two.
108
00:06:42,540 --> 00:06:45,480
Well, actually, only one.
109
00:06:46,500 --> 00:06:48,680
It helps to visualize the audience
naked.
110
00:06:51,140 --> 00:06:52,280
Naked? Yeah.
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00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:55,420
That's what I do every time I have to
give a speech. See, it's hard to be
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00:06:55,420 --> 00:06:57,600
intimidated by people when they're in
their birthday suits.
113
00:06:58,620 --> 00:06:59,620
Totally naked.
114
00:07:00,780 --> 00:07:04,500
Actually, I can see the psychological
validity of that technique. The men,
115
00:07:06,140 --> 00:07:07,220
I can give it a shot.
116
00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:08,920
Thanks, guys.
117
00:07:09,120 --> 00:07:10,840
You've given me the courage to go on.
118
00:07:11,340 --> 00:07:13,120
See you in class tomorrow, friend.
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00:07:16,400 --> 00:07:17,400
Bye, Mason.
120
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:18,339
Bye, Mason.
121
00:07:18,340 --> 00:07:19,360
Uh, Angela, Angela.
122
00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:25,840
You know, you know last month when you
gave that speech at the ad club and I
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00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:26,840
sitting in the front row?
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00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:32,980
Did you happen to use your visualization
trick?
125
00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:37,460
Let's just say I could have talked all
night.
126
00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:48,660
Come on, come on. Who wants to know
next? Come on, let's build up the kitty.
127
00:07:48,740 --> 00:07:49,740
Come on, come on.
128
00:07:50,830 --> 00:07:53,130
Hey, Tony, you want in on the fainting
pool?
129
00:07:53,690 --> 00:07:57,410
The fainting pool? Yeah, we're betting
to see how long it takes before the boy
130
00:07:57,410 --> 00:07:58,510
wonder hits the floor.
131
00:07:59,870 --> 00:08:02,190
For three minutes, I am going to win
big.
132
00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:04,790
Yeah, I hope you lose your shirt.
133
00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:21,080
Good afternoon, class.
134
00:08:21,740 --> 00:08:27,920
Now, can anyone tell me what country is
often considered the bedrock of Western
135
00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:30,800
civilization? Bedrock? Yeah, that's
where the Flintstones lived.
136
00:08:31,140 --> 00:08:32,200
Yabba -dabba -doo.
137
00:08:37,020 --> 00:08:38,020
Mason,
138
00:08:38,500 --> 00:08:39,500
Mason, visualize.
139
00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:41,580
Thank you. Oh, all right.
140
00:08:57,930 --> 00:08:58,930
I'd like to answer that.
141
00:08:59,390 --> 00:09:01,150
Could you stand, please?
142
00:09:05,730 --> 00:09:07,310
Would the answer be England?
143
00:09:11,910 --> 00:09:12,910
Mr. Peters?
144
00:09:14,270 --> 00:09:15,490
Mason. Mason.
145
00:09:15,690 --> 00:09:17,410
Huh? Put our clothes back on.
146
00:09:18,950 --> 00:09:25,750
The answer
147
00:09:25,750 --> 00:09:26,750
is Greece.
148
00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:32,460
Now, in what century did the first Greek
city -states emerge?
149
00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:34,440
Tony.
150
00:09:35,820 --> 00:09:42,640
700 A .D. And what was the form of
government of these city -states? Tony.
151
00:09:44,020 --> 00:09:50,080
They were republics. Excellent. Now,
what was the name of a military city
152
00:09:50,080 --> 00:09:51,100
-state? Tony.
153
00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:53,880
Sparta.
154
00:09:54,420 --> 00:09:55,420
Superb.
155
00:09:55,950 --> 00:09:57,810
I love the way this class gets involved.
156
00:10:01,850 --> 00:10:03,650
May I address this one, Mr. Peters?
157
00:10:03,910 --> 00:10:05,150
Go right ahead, Cynthia.
158
00:10:05,950 --> 00:10:10,150
Well, I believe that we are not only
indebted to the Greeks for their
159
00:10:10,150 --> 00:10:15,110
contributions in philosophy, but to a
greater extent in art and architecture.
160
00:10:16,290 --> 00:10:17,510
That's very true, Cynthia.
161
00:10:18,130 --> 00:10:22,090
But as Mr. Mastelli so incisively
pointed out last week...
162
00:10:22,350 --> 00:10:26,110
we cannot overlook the contributions the
Greeks made in terms of the physical
163
00:10:26,110 --> 00:10:27,110
sciences.
164
00:10:27,570 --> 00:10:33,670
In fact, what Greek philosopher first
postulated the theory of the atom?
165
00:10:34,970 --> 00:10:36,350
You want to feel this one, Tony?
166
00:10:39,050 --> 00:10:40,270
Not particularly.
167
00:10:40,690 --> 00:10:41,810
Ah, come on, give it a shot.
168
00:10:42,170 --> 00:10:43,950
Ah, well, that's a tough one.
169
00:10:45,250 --> 00:10:46,250
Socrates?
170
00:10:46,730 --> 00:10:49,170
Excellent! I'm right? Not even close.
171
00:10:49,970 --> 00:10:51,250
It was Democritus.
172
00:10:51,720 --> 00:10:55,200
But the fact that you were willing to
take a risk and answer a question about
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something that happened so long ago is a
testament to your courage, dedication,
174
00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:03,660
and just plain stick -to -itiveness.
175
00:11:04,560 --> 00:11:06,240
This is a student.
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00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:08,000
This is a crook.
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00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:14,940
Now remember, class, your essays are due
on Thursday and they'll count for 30 %
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00:11:14,940 --> 00:11:16,500
of your grade. Have a nice day.
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00:11:17,620 --> 00:11:18,620
Hi, got a minute?
180
00:11:18,860 --> 00:11:20,120
Sure, what's up?
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00:11:20,949 --> 00:11:21,949
Don't play Mr.
182
00:11:22,190 --> 00:11:23,190
Innocent with me.
183
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:25,790
Pardon? I know what you two are up to.
184
00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:29,770
I see the favoritism, I see the
cronyism, and I think it stinks.
185
00:11:30,350 --> 00:11:34,550
And if it doesn't stop, I'm going to the
dean. Okay, Cynthia, lighten up, huh?
186
00:11:34,610 --> 00:11:35,329
Lighten up.
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00:11:35,330 --> 00:11:36,330
Hold that thought.
188
00:11:36,510 --> 00:11:37,970
Mason, could you come here, please?
189
00:11:38,270 --> 00:11:39,390
Oh, sure, Tony. What's up?
190
00:11:39,910 --> 00:11:42,310
Now, go ahead, Cynthia. You tell him
what you just told me.
191
00:11:42,750 --> 00:11:47,550
Mr. Peters, I was just saying what a
wonderful teacher you are.
192
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And what an honor it is to be in your
class.
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00:11:52,740 --> 00:11:54,980
Thank you.
194
00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:57,540
Thank you for calling me over to hear
that, Tony.
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00:11:57,860 --> 00:11:59,080
What a thoughtful guy.
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00:12:01,160 --> 00:12:03,980
Mason, Mason, wait a minute. We got to
talk about this class.
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00:12:04,240 --> 00:12:05,320
Oh, it's going great, isn't it?
198
00:12:05,580 --> 00:12:09,200
Well, of course it is. And it wouldn't
have taken off if it weren't for you.
199
00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:11,220
there's a problem, Mason. There's a
problem.
200
00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:14,020
I mean, some of the kids, they were
upset. They were upset because you keep
201
00:12:14,020 --> 00:12:15,020
giving me all the attention.
202
00:12:15,950 --> 00:12:16,950
It's okay, Tony.
203
00:12:17,150 --> 00:12:18,570
Hang in there. You'll make friends.
204
00:12:19,650 --> 00:12:21,670
That Cynthia girl seems to like you.
205
00:12:23,830 --> 00:12:27,210
What are you smirking at, Curly?
206
00:12:31,110 --> 00:12:33,290
Hi. How was school?
207
00:12:33,670 --> 00:12:35,010
In a word, Mason.
208
00:12:35,250 --> 00:12:39,450
Oh, is he still applauding your every
word? No, no. Now he's cheering. He's
209
00:12:39,450 --> 00:12:41,170
jumping out of his seat. He's doing the
wave.
210
00:12:42,730 --> 00:12:44,770
The little squirt is driving me nuts.
211
00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:49,040
No, not you.
212
00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:50,320
Oh, Mason.
213
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:52,980
Please, please. I don't even want to
hear his name.
214
00:12:53,780 --> 00:12:55,380
Mason, Mason, Mason.
215
00:12:56,000 --> 00:13:00,200
That guy cracks me up. I was just on the
phone with him, and he told me that you
216
00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:01,440
are a natural scholar.
217
00:13:01,860 --> 00:13:04,800
You must have him wrapped around your
little finger.
218
00:13:05,940 --> 00:13:07,520
All right, Tony.
219
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:09,320
Easy A.
220
00:13:10,730 --> 00:13:13,590
Look, I'm not going to school to get an
easy anything. I want to be judged
221
00:13:13,590 --> 00:13:17,870
fairly. That is right, Mother. Some
people still believe in hard work and
222
00:13:17,870 --> 00:13:18,870
traditional value.
223
00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:20,590
Sure.
224
00:13:20,930 --> 00:13:22,930
Tony and a gang of Quakers.
225
00:13:24,130 --> 00:13:27,570
Look, Mona, what do you do when somebody
sees you as perfect?
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00:13:28,150 --> 00:13:30,290
I make them buy me things. Why did I
hear that?
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00:13:32,670 --> 00:13:37,090
I had a problem like that when Jeannie
Gordian had this major crush on me.
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00:13:38,750 --> 00:13:39,970
It can happen.
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00:13:41,870 --> 00:13:44,250
She drove me nuts, followed me
everywhere.
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She was like a puppy.
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00:13:45,850 --> 00:13:48,810
So one day at lunch, I made chocolate
milk come out of my nose.
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She looked at me, screamed, and ran into
a closet.
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And I never heard from her again.
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00:13:57,350 --> 00:13:58,350
No.
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00:13:59,590 --> 00:14:03,210
No, I don't even think the chocolate
milk out of the nose trick is going to
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00:14:03,210 --> 00:14:03,969
with this guy.
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00:14:03,970 --> 00:14:06,230
Oh, I don't know, Dad. Mason's got a
pretty weak stomach.
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00:14:07,150 --> 00:14:10,410
Wait a minute. Maybe my grandson has an
idea here.
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00:14:10,750 --> 00:14:15,550
I mean, if you want Mason to think that
you are not brilliant, write a lousy
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00:14:15,550 --> 00:14:19,650
paper. No way, Mona. I'm not writing a
lousy paper. I just spent two weeks
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00:14:19,650 --> 00:14:23,570
writing a good paper. Oh, but Dad, a
lousy paper only takes 10, 15 minutes.
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00:14:23,610 --> 00:14:24,610
Trust me, I know.
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00:14:25,950 --> 00:14:30,070
You know, I usually don't approve of
academic hijinks, but this may be the
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00:14:30,070 --> 00:14:34,210
therapy that Mason needs. You know, a
paper full of historical inaccuracies,
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00:14:34,230 --> 00:14:36,750
misnomers, and assorted goofy stuff.
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00:14:37,690 --> 00:14:39,230
I don't do goofy.
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00:14:40,189 --> 00:14:43,730
I mean, gosh, this goes against every
ethical principle I hold dear.
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00:14:44,530 --> 00:14:48,110
Well, then, hand in your good paper, and
for the rest of the semester, live with
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00:14:48,110 --> 00:14:49,110
the curse of Mason.
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00:14:50,130 --> 00:14:51,290
10, 15 minutes?
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00:14:51,590 --> 00:14:52,650
Tom. Okay,
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00:14:57,310 --> 00:15:01,350
I'll have your essays back next class
session. And remember, guys, history is
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00:15:01,350 --> 00:15:02,490
just a thing of the past.
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00:15:06,730 --> 00:15:07,770
Welcome, sir. Welcome.
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00:15:08,090 --> 00:15:09,770
Well, Mason, how's it going?
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00:15:10,010 --> 00:15:15,170
Oh, wonderful, sir. I have a terrific
bunch of students. But this guy, this
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00:15:15,170 --> 00:15:16,170
is top.
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00:15:16,530 --> 00:15:19,130
Tony Maselli, my prize pupil.
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00:15:19,330 --> 00:15:20,850
Oh, he does go on.
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00:15:21,590 --> 00:15:25,210
Anyway, Mason, I just wanted to find out
how you were doing, see if you needed
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00:15:25,210 --> 00:15:27,530
any help, maybe look over your lesson
plans.
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00:15:27,890 --> 00:15:29,910
Are you checking up on me, sir?
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00:15:30,270 --> 00:15:31,390
Well, yes.
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00:15:32,910 --> 00:15:35,290
Well, you know, if you'd really like to
see the kind of work we're doing in this
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00:15:35,290 --> 00:15:37,150
class, why don't you just look at these
essays?
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00:15:37,530 --> 00:15:38,530
No, no, no.
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00:15:38,870 --> 00:15:43,250
I mean, I'm sure the dean is so busy
that he probably has a lot of other
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00:15:43,250 --> 00:15:44,250
that are more important to do.
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00:15:44,470 --> 00:15:48,810
Actually, the idea of a red pencil in my
hand poised to strike out at the first
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00:15:48,810 --> 00:15:50,770
anachronism excites me.
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00:15:51,110 --> 00:15:52,890
It excites me, too, sir.
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00:15:54,010 --> 00:15:55,810
You guys are going to be excited.
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00:15:59,010 --> 00:16:00,010
Hi,
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00:16:00,870 --> 00:16:01,869
Tony. You.
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00:16:01,870 --> 00:16:03,130
Hi. You.
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00:16:03,650 --> 00:16:04,509
Hi, Tony.
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00:16:04,510 --> 00:16:05,510
And you.
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00:16:06,770 --> 00:16:08,130
I think we're in trouble.
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00:16:08,350 --> 00:16:11,810
No, no, no. You're not in trouble. I'm
in trouble. I'm the one who handed in
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00:16:11,810 --> 00:16:14,850
that phony essay. You know, the one you
told me to write that was going to solve
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00:16:14,850 --> 00:16:15,850
all my problems.
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00:16:15,910 --> 00:16:16,910
Well, guess who's reading it?
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00:16:17,430 --> 00:16:18,430
Gore Vidal?
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00:16:19,990 --> 00:16:20,990
The dean.
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00:16:21,550 --> 00:16:22,750
That's terrible.
286
00:16:23,250 --> 00:16:24,790
Why did you listen to us?
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00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:29,010
It's going to be all right. Don't get
carried away. There is a way out of
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00:16:29,230 --> 00:16:30,890
Oh, goody. More advice.
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00:16:31,850 --> 00:16:34,570
Tony, all you have to do is go to the
dean and ask for the paperback.
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00:16:34,810 --> 00:16:37,610
Oh, that's brilliant, Angela. That's
really brilliant. Then he's going to ask
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00:16:37,610 --> 00:16:40,210
why I wrote it. I'm going to have to
tell him about Mason. I'll get the kid
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00:16:40,210 --> 00:16:43,190
trouble. Yeah, that was a dumb idea.
293
00:16:43,790 --> 00:16:45,510
Yeah, well, what kind of idea do you
have, Mona?
294
00:16:47,030 --> 00:16:48,850
I think you should talk to Samantha.
295
00:16:50,010 --> 00:16:51,010
Okay.
296
00:16:56,170 --> 00:16:59,710
the rat for the bad paper, Dad. I know.
If you squeal on Mason, he's going to
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00:16:59,710 --> 00:17:03,210
get chewed out by the dean, fall into a
deep depression, check into a
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00:17:03,210 --> 00:17:05,430
sanitarium, and then we will never hear
from him again.
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00:17:07,430 --> 00:17:08,550
I can live with that.
300
00:17:10,109 --> 00:17:12,050
Dean, may I call you Dean?
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00:17:12,630 --> 00:17:15,829
Look, I have an intellectual challenge
for you.
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00:17:16,050 --> 00:17:20,569
Let's say I, as a student, did something
incredibly stupid, but for a good
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00:17:20,569 --> 00:17:25,329
cause. Unfortunately, a cause which I
cannot explain to you. But if you knew,
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00:17:25,430 --> 00:17:26,430
you'd understand.
305
00:17:26,530 --> 00:17:31,830
Okay? Okay. Now, you, as a dean, have
the power to overlook this. Not that all
306
00:17:31,830 --> 00:17:35,690
deans would do that. I mean, but I have
a feeling that you're a special dean.
307
00:17:35,990 --> 00:17:39,230
You know, you're a dean with a heart.
You're a daring dean.
308
00:17:39,950 --> 00:17:45,250
One who would turn back the clock 24
hours and pretend that I'd never handed
309
00:17:45,250 --> 00:17:46,250
this essay.
310
00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:50,540
Mr. Metelli, this is all very
interesting, but I haven't read your
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00:17:50,540 --> 00:17:51,459
never mind.
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00:17:51,460 --> 00:17:54,020
However, you have piqued my curiosity.
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00:17:55,020 --> 00:17:57,120
I'll just give this a quick perusal.
314
00:17:57,600 --> 00:18:01,560
Aren't there a lot of other things you'd
rather peruse? No, no, no.
315
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:03,960
Mr.
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00:18:06,140 --> 00:18:08,140
Metelli, this stinks.
317
00:18:09,120 --> 00:18:10,120
I know.
318
00:18:10,420 --> 00:18:12,180
Why would you write this drivel?
319
00:18:13,060 --> 00:18:14,300
Dean, look, it's tough.
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00:18:15,310 --> 00:18:16,390
I don't want to tell you.
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00:18:18,130 --> 00:18:19,130
Come in.
322
00:18:19,710 --> 00:18:20,950
Hi, Dean Brown.
323
00:18:21,390 --> 00:18:25,570
I heard that my prize student was here
and I wanted some reflected glory.
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00:18:26,630 --> 00:18:27,630
Reflect on this.
325
00:18:32,030 --> 00:18:33,850
Lifestyles of the old and Grecian?
326
00:18:34,730 --> 00:18:35,730
Tony,
327
00:18:37,570 --> 00:18:39,930
this... This... Stinks.
328
00:18:40,670 --> 00:18:42,370
Why would you write this?
329
00:18:43,149 --> 00:18:44,850
Dribble. Yeah, why, Tony?
330
00:18:45,830 --> 00:18:47,830
I can't tell you now.
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00:18:48,510 --> 00:18:51,790
Tony, this isn't like you. I mean, why
would you treat this assignment like a
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00:18:51,790 --> 00:18:54,230
joke? I can't tell you right now.
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00:18:54,510 --> 00:18:55,530
Yes, you can.
334
00:18:55,810 --> 00:18:57,750
Not in front of the D -E -A -N.
335
00:18:59,490 --> 00:19:00,490
That's me.
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00:19:02,090 --> 00:19:06,030
Look, nothing can be said to me that
can't be said in front of the dean.
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00:19:06,630 --> 00:19:10,230
Now, I respected you as a student. The
least you can do is give me the same
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00:19:10,230 --> 00:19:11,530
respect as a teacher.
339
00:19:13,230 --> 00:19:14,870
Okay, Mason, have a seat.
340
00:19:16,750 --> 00:19:19,090
How could I have been so blinded by
gratitude?
341
00:19:19,530 --> 00:19:21,070
I mean, Tony's not a genius.
342
00:19:21,590 --> 00:19:22,850
He's not a great scholar.
343
00:19:23,150 --> 00:19:25,230
He's not the most brilliant student in
the world.
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00:19:25,630 --> 00:19:27,690
Mason, they get the point.
345
00:19:28,970 --> 00:19:31,410
So what did the dean say after he got
the whole story?
346
00:19:31,630 --> 00:19:32,870
He accepted my resignation.
347
00:19:34,150 --> 00:19:35,510
Oh, what a bummer.
348
00:19:35,950 --> 00:19:39,010
Oh, that's okay. I wasn't emotionally
ready to teach.
349
00:19:39,210 --> 00:19:42,610
I mean, any teacher who would show
favoritism to a student who wasn't that
350
00:19:42,610 --> 00:19:46,870
smart, who wasn't a genius, who
wasn't... Mason, we already covered
351
00:19:47,890 --> 00:19:51,030
I don't know. I guess I'll start
teaching again when I've grown up a
352
00:19:51,150 --> 00:19:54,050
when I'm more mature, when I have a new
perspective on life.
353
00:19:54,550 --> 00:19:55,550
When I'm 17.
354
00:19:56,370 --> 00:19:59,830
Hey, look, Mason, before you know it,
you'll be back at the podium coughing
355
00:19:59,830 --> 00:20:01,270
sneezing at the chalk dust, huh?
356
00:20:01,990 --> 00:20:03,230
Hey, you, uh...
357
00:20:03,660 --> 00:20:04,720
You sure you're not mad at me?
358
00:20:04,960 --> 00:20:07,140
No, I'm happy the way things turned out.
359
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:08,840
You mean it?
360
00:20:09,780 --> 00:20:15,220
Okay, not happy, but I'm alive, I have
my health, and I have a friend.
361
00:20:16,180 --> 00:20:20,180
Although I will miss looking out into a
sea of naked bodies.
362
00:20:20,900 --> 00:20:21,900
Naked bodies?
363
00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:23,380
You don't want to know. Yes, I do.
364
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:24,600
No, you don't.
365
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:26,280
I'll tell you later. No, you won't.
366
00:20:28,540 --> 00:20:31,560
I think that's for me. I told my study
date to meet me here.
367
00:20:34,390 --> 00:20:36,270
Hi, Mace. Hi, Sid.
368
00:20:36,850 --> 00:20:37,850
Bye, guys.
369
00:20:41,150 --> 00:20:43,130
She's obviously using him.
370
00:20:43,370 --> 00:20:44,850
Yeah, if he's lucky.
371
00:20:50,710 --> 00:20:55,770
Hey, like I always say, you know, the
key to fitness is discipline.
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00:20:55,970 --> 00:21:00,990
I mean, in your exercise and in your
diet. Yeah, after all, you are what you
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00:21:00,990 --> 00:21:02,980
eat. And I am a chocolate cake.
27572
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