Original subtitles

Who can turn the world on with a smile?

Who can take a nothing day and suddenly make it all

seem worthwhile?

Well, it's you, girl, and you should know it.

With each glance and every little movement you show it, love is all

need to waste it. You can have the town, why don't you take it?

You're gonna make it after all.

You're gonna make it after all.

Oh, Jake, this has been a terrific evening. Lots of fun. Good. I'm glad you

finally agreed to go out with me.

Hey, what a nice apartment.

Oh, thank you.

Would you like a brandy? Oh, no, no. No, thank you, Mary. Anything more to drink

tonight and I'll start to giggle.

That's how you can tell when I've had enough, I giggle.

Isn't that the silliest thing you ever heard?

I'll fix you some coffee.

Coffee sounds great.

Tell you the truth, I could use some myself after all that wine.

Oh, you didn't have that much wine.

Well, it was a lot for me.

Four glasses.

You had five, but who's counting?

Well, four or five.

It's delicious, but it sneaks up on you, you know? Wine tastes so good, you

don't... What are you doing?

Oh, I just thought I'd make myself comfortable.

What do you think you're doing?

Oh, I just figured it was a good idea. Put on your shirt.

Oh, come on, Mary. What?

It was a... Geez, I hardly know you.

I didn't mean any harm.

Well, we seem to be hitting it off, and I just thought... You just thought. You

just thought.

You just thought.

This isn't the first date this has ever happened to you, is it? Yes, as a matter

of fact. This is a first. Out.

Maybe I haven't dated much.

Haven't dated much?

decades of dating.

Don't tell me I haven't dated much.

I go out on an average of two times a week.

That's a hundred times twenty years. That's two thousand.

You don't like it? Why did you do it two thousand times?

Well, they haven't all been bad. There have been some good ones.

About ten percent.

An 1800 rotten one.

I probably should have taken a hint from the very first date.

I remember it all so clearly.

Roseburg High.

Jack O 'Brien took me to the football dinner dance.

Brought me a corsage.

To which, as it turned out, he was allergic.

So every time we danced, he sneezed.

Poor guy.

I was wearing my first strapless gown.

I was terrified it wouldn't stay up.

I had to go around all hunched over.

All night long, we drifted across the dance floor, hunching and sneezing,

hunching.

It's nice to have memories.

I just can't figure out why you're making such a big thing out of this.

I am thinking of all the rituals of dating. And for what?

All the hours spent getting through the evenings, saying all those things you

have to say.

I mean, I just have had it with all these games over and over again. I'm too

for this.

Mary, I'm really sorry if I upset you.

No, listen, I probably overreacted. Listen, it just hit me all of a sudden,

know, and I really... I shouldn't have taken it all out on you. No, no, not at

all. Not at all, no.

This has been a very special evening for me, too. I've never had a girl talk to

me like this. I mean, open up and tell me everything that she's feeling.

That's very rare.

Oh, well, thank you.

It's nice of you to say that. I mean, it makes me think maybe there's some hope

after all.

How about some coffee?

I'd love some.

I mean, I usually don't do things like that. I mean, if you knew me, you would

know...

Did you have a good time?

Not terrific.

Oh, that's too bad, dear.

Perhaps you should think about changing your escort service.

Hi, dear. Guys!

Hi.

Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but Lou has given me my first feature

assignment on the news.

I'm going to be covering that bodybuilder's contest at the armory to

best male body in the Twin Cities.

Oh, well, then I'd better schedule a cameraman.

Oh, that won't be necessary, dear.

I thought I'd trace them.

Oh, wait a minute. Maybe I don't want a picture like that on my news.

Those bodybuilders are all that little, you know.

No, Ted, a little what?

Oh, come on, Mary.

There's a name for a guy like that who spends all the time posing, batting his

eyes, blowing kisses at himself in the mirror.

Right. Ted Baxter.

Either he's a lucky guesser or you're a blabbermouth.

Don't you listen to Ted, Mary. It's going to be a wonderful feature.

Besides, it would be a crime to waste two dozen gorgeous bodies, especially

there are women in India going to bed frustrated.

Oh, that Sue Ann.

She's so lucky, isn't she? I mean, she never tires of playing the game.

What's wrong, Mary?

I don't know, Georgette. Me, men, dating.

You know how you go along thinking someday you'll meet the right person?

Well, for the first time, I'm not sure that's going to happen.

I'm not even sure he exists.

At least not the kind of man I'm talking about.

You mean like Ted?

Well, my version of Ted.

I mean, I didn't think I was asking for that much, but I haven't met anyone who

even comes close.

Someone who doesn't care how I look because he's more concerned with who I

Somebody strong and intelligent.

Who respects me.

Who I can respect.

Who has gentleness in him.

I guess there just aren't any men like that.

Sure there are.

You know one.

Well, if I do, I sure wish you'd point him out.

Lou Grant.

Oh, come on.

He has every quality you said you wanted, and I'll throw in one of my own.

He's cute as a button.

Me, date?

Lou Grant?

Come on, that's ridiculous.

I mean, sure, I enjoy his company, and yes, he is someone I respect, and I have

a good time with him, and he doesn't play little games, and I am...

comfortable with him.

And he is straightforward and intelligent and fun.

You're right, Mary. It was a dippy idea.

George, yes.

You know, I could date Mr. Grant.

I really could. I could walk in that office and ask him for a date.

I could just get up and walk in there and hit on him.

I could.

And I want to.

And I should.

So why aren't my feet taking me in there?

No guts.

Okay.

That did it. I thought it would.

I know, you thought it would.

I'm gonna do it anyway.

I thought you were. I know.

Yeah.

Mr. Grant, could I talk to you for a minute?

Sure.

What's wrong?

Well, I'm not sure how to say what I want to say.

Why don't you just stammer like you always do?

Mr. Grant, could you please be just a little more sensitive?

I don't want the tough part.

I want the gentle.

What are you talking about? I'm talking about the fact that I'm about to do

something that's sort of difficult.

I'm going to say something, and I'm not sure how you're going to react.

So... Okay, all right, here goes.

I think you're a terrific man, Lou Grant, and I want to go out on a

date with you.

You want to go out on a date with me?

Yeah, you're mine.

All right, wait a minute, wait a minute. Maybe I'm jumping to conclusions.

What do you mean by a date? A date in what sense?

In the sense of a man and woman who date.

Well, we're not a man and a woman.

We're friends.

We respect each other. We care for each other. We care a great deal.

How can two people who feel like that date each other? Well, Grant, I'm not

going to try to talk you into dating me. Really, just forget I brought it up.

Wait a minute.

What is it?

I don't know.

I just thought it was important to stop you.

Now you can go.

Why don't you want to go out with me?

What? Because I never thought about you socially.

Never?

Once.

Once. Yeah.

The time you wore that black dress with the red rose to the Teddy Awards.

But just that once.

Did, uh...

Did you ever think about me that way before?

Once.

The time you wore that brown suit with the narrow tie and

wine stains.

Salt from the pretzels on the lip.

That was the only time.

That is a nice -looking suit.

Mary?

You got yourself a date.

Good.

Um... Tonight?

Fine.

My place for dinner?

Sure.

Good. Well, then, I'll see you tonight, Mr... Lou.

This is completely... This is completely crazy, you know that?

Are you sure?

Maybe not.

There's something on your mind.

Why do you say that?

Because you're not listening to me. You look at me, but you're not listening. So

there's got to be something on your mind.

Why do you say that?

Drew. What?

I just told you. Oh, I'm sorry, Murray.

I guess I wasn't listening to you.

There's something on my mind.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

It's about Mary.

Mary? What's wrong with Mary? That's what I'd like to know.

No, what's wrong with Mary?

Guess.

Who she is planning to date.

Oh.

Well, let's see.

She is terrifically attractive and desirable and...

Well, could have had almost anyone she wants. Right, right.

Yeah, so you wouldn't be asking me to guess unless it was someone unlikely.

Very clever of her.

You're getting warm. Someone terribly unattractive.

Totally undesirable.

A real creep, a born loser. Hey, hey.

You looking for trouble?

What are you talking about, Lil?

She, uh... wants to date me.

What? You heard me.

Mary wants me to be her boyfriend.

Why?

I'm sorry, Lou. I didn't mean anything by that.

No, no.

It's okay.

It's okay.

It's a perfectly reasonable question.

Wow. Yeah.

Another one, Lou? Yeah.

How about you, Murray? No, no, no, thanks.

Now, Lou, tell me, do you really mean that Mary wants you to go out with

her? Yep.

Tonight.

She made it very clear.

She's tired of the guy she's been dating and she wants to date me.

I don't know what to do.

What would you do, Murray, if you were single and Mary asked you to go out with

her?

Salivate. Yeah, yeah, I forgot. You've always been in love with her.

But I'm... I'm completely wrong for her.

I'm too old.

I'm too... everything.

No, no, you're not, Lou.

Hey, Mary's right. I can see her point.

What are you talking about?

Well, you're a very attractive guy, Lou. Oh, come on. No, no, no. And I can see

where you might be right for Mary.

I mean, you're entertaining.

You're smart.

You're considerate.

Mature.

And you're single.

And she's got a lot going for you.

You really think so?

Why, Lou, you shouldn't have.

Yeah, well, I couldn't remember which kind of flowers that

you like best.

So you brought two?

Three.

Thank you.

And here's some wine.

And some chocolates.

So, here I am.

Right.

I'll make you a drink.

Oh, and I'll open the wine. Oh, okay. Here.

Okay.

You look sensational.

Thank you.

So do you.

Oh!

Excuse me. No, no, my fault. No, no, I was counting you.

Look,

look, it's silly.

The two of us...

feeling awkward like this.

We're both mature.

We understand that this is a new situation for the both of us, but we can

handle it.

That's exactly what I was going to say.

Put this on the table.

What are you smirking at?

We've known each other as long as we have. Suddenly, ill at ease, in

In suspense about what?

You know, about what's going to happen.

Both of us wondering whether you're going to, you know, kiss me.

No,

I wasn't thinking about that.

my mind.

Certainly not before dinner.

We've got a whole evening in front of us.

Drinks, food, a whole evening.

Cheers. Cheers.

Let's eat. Why not?

Yes, yes.

You really look sensational.

Wearing that dress was a nice gesture.

Well, two kinds of flowers was a nice gesture, too.

Three. Three.

Shall I put on some music? No, no, no.

I don't like to eat to music. It tends to make me chew in rhythm.

Thank you.

Say, say, Ted did something kind of funny on the broadcast tonight.

No, no newsroom talk.

What? No, not on a date. We can't talk about the newsroom.

Oh, right.

Lettuce. Oh, Moo, this is silly. We don't have to make dumb, small talk

I mean, can't we just behave normally?

My hand is sweaty, isn't it? No, it isn't.

No,

it's not good at this. No, but sweaty hands run in my family.

No, no, this is what happens when I get nervous.

I've just never been good at this sort of thing. No, that's all right. I'm not

good at it either. Oh, sure, yeah, sure. No, I'm not. Not when I'm this nervous.

You mean you're nervous right now?

A little.

Mary, we're not going to feel comfortable here until we find out where

dating stuff leads.

I think you're right.

I don't know about you, but the suspense is killing me.

Well, then, let's end the suspense.

Okay.

Hey.

silly kissing.

Didn't that turn out to be just so dumb?

I think we both just found out something at record time.

I do, too. This will never work. Never in a million years.

Good night, Mary.

Good night, Lou.

Say Ted did something tonight on the broadcast. It was really kind of fun.