All language subtitles for Mary Tyler Moore s07e19 Mary and the Sexagenarian

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Original subtitles

Who can turn the world on with her smile?

Who can take a nothing day and suddenly make it all

seem worthwhile?

Well, it's you, girl, and you should know it.

With each glance and every little movement you show it, love is all

need to waste it. You can have a town, why don't you take it?

You're gonna make it after all

You're gonna make it after

all

Good

morning,

darling

rocks floor.

Even as a kid.

Ted, can't you do this at home before you come in?

Well, yeah, I do.

But this is a much better floor.

Except for that little ridge there.

Oh? Other than that, it's a piece of cake.

Oh, good.

Good.

Lou, I always do things like this when I'm bored.

Sometimes people act nuts when they're bored.

Sometimes people act nuts when they're nuts.

because the news has been so dull lately. When are we going to get some

news?

Last three nights were nothing but human interest junk.

Ted, we can't report any exciting news unless something exciting happens in the

world. And nothing very exciting is happening lately.

Well, then why don't we give them some old news?

Flash! Germany has just surrendered unconditionally.

Ted, that happened over 30 years ago.

I know, but maybe people would like to hear it again.

Mary, when are we going to get some exciting news to report?

Well, Ted, you may be in luck. They've had some interesting progress on a

medical research project at the university.

Seems it may be close to a cure for the common cold.

How close?

Well, they've cured over 80 % of the rats in the experiment.

I can just hear myself reading that headline.

Good news for rat lovers.

heartbreaking sound of a rat with sniffles.

Thanks a lot, Murray.

Excuse me.

I'm looking for Murray Slaughter.

Well, you've come to the right place, but he's not in yet. You can wait if you

like. Oh, thank you. I won't be in the way?

No, no. I'll try not to even notice you're here.

I'm not sure I want you to go that far.

Would you like to have a seat?

No, thanks. I've been sitting in a plane for weeks.

Where have you been?

Florence, Cairo, Copenhagen, Buffalo.

Buffalo? I wanted to get in some sightseeing.

Buffalo is my home office.

Oh, what do you do?

I'm an international financial consultant.

Oh. What do you do?

I'm a domestic news producer.

I'm Mary Richards.

My pleasure.

Gee, you know, I always thought if anyone ever really did that to me, I'd

And I did.

I'm sorry, Mary. I've been abroad for so long, I guess it was automatic. No,

it's okay.

I'm Doug Booth.

How do you do?

I liked your way better.

Mary, I'm being presumptuous.

You know next to nothing about me. You're not the kind of woman that does

in such incredibly short notice.

And now that I've anticipated every objection you could possibly make, how

having dinner with me tomorrow night?

Well, I'm sorry. I have other plans.

How could I have missed that one?

How about tonight?

Well, tonight I'm having dinner with Murray and his wife. Unless you'd like

make it a foursome. Sure, a foursome will be fine. Well, then it's a date,

It's a date, Doug.

Oh, here's Murray now.

Murray! Dad!

the clothes so early.

Well, I think the band needed a break to untune their instruments. They were

getting dangerously close to the melody.

Besides, it was getting a little late. Yeah, but they stopped just as I was

catching on to that new dance of yours. What's it called?

The Walt. The Walt.

Oh,

Doug, it was a wonderful evening. It really was. Oh, you don't have to

me. I was there.

And I had no idea there were so many places to dance in Minneapolis.

Did you, Murray?

I thought so.

Do you suppose I went for a moonlight stroll?

Somehow, I doubt that.

Look,

Marie, they're still at it.

There you are.

Well, we haven't seen you two since the elevator.

Oh, Marie and I are both stiff. We haven't been dancing for ten years.

Wasn't it fun?

Oh, yeah, fun.

I think I strained my trick ankle.

Marie, I thought you always said you had a trick knee.

That's one of its tricks.

Thanks, Mayor.

If I had another drink, I'd be in no condition to watch Marie drive.

How about you, Doug? Would you like a brandy? Sure, let's have one for the

All right.

What time is it anyway, Dad? It's only 3 .30. 3 .30?

Marie, the babysitter. Oh, relax, honey. I called her and told her we'd be late.

How come you never mentioned your father before?

I have, Mary.

You've heard me talk about my old man.

Oh, old man.

There, you see, was your choice of words that threw me. Well, now, that's very

nice, Mary, but aren't you a little bit aware of the difference in our ages?

No.

Oh, come on. How old do you think I am?

Forty. Murray is forty -two.

We married early.

I hope you're going to be in town for a while.

Well, I don't know how long.

Can we see each other again?

I'd like that.

Then I may linger a long while.

Good. Look at that. Murray was always so cute when he was asleep.

Have you spent much time in Minneapolis?

I was raised here. It's a wonderful city.

I'm anxious to show you one of my favorite places.

Stockholm. Have you ever seen Stockholm in the spring?

No. What's it like?

Well, very much like it is in the winter.

Stockholm. School.

Gosh.

Dad.

We've got to get you home to bed. Oh, yes, yes. Way past my bed time.

Sorry to be such a party pooper.

Don't worry, Dad. None of us is getting any younger. Oh, good night, Mary. Good

night. Good night, Mary.

I'll call you tomorrow.

Come on, Dad, before you fall asleep on your feet. He's not so cute when he's

awake.

I'm sorry to disturb you, Mary, but I forgot something.

Oh, what'd you forget?

I forgot to leave my hat so I could come back and do this.

You sneak.

Watch out, Mary.

Next time I might forget my overcoat.

Oh, Mary, Marie wanted me to invite you over tonight. We're going to have a

little get -together for Dad.

Well, as a matter of fact, Mary... It's okay, Mary. You don't have to accept.

We're just going to have some family and some old friends. No, no, Murray, I'm

coming anyway.

Doug asked me this morning. Oh, hey, that's very nice of you, Mary. It's my

pleasure. Hey, listen, I want to tell you how much I appreciate you going out

with Dad.

It really means a lot to the old guy.

Gee, Murr, every time you talk about your father, you make him sound like

Kringle. He looks and acts a lot younger than he is, you know. In fact, I was

shocked when you told me he's your father.

When I told you?

And you didn't know it when you agreed to go out with him? No.

I mean, you have different last names. I didn't know your mother had married

twice. Well, if you didn't know he was my father, why did you go out with him?

Because he's a charming and attractive man.

And because I like him and enjoy his company.

That's the most disgusting thing I ever heard.

Murray, what's so disgusting about my going out with your father?

Look, the thought of you two together is just ridiculous.

Gee, I've never seen you so upset over something so silly. Well, Mary, my

is 68 years old, and that makes him 30 years older than you are. Well, to me,

Murray, age is irrelevant, insignificant, and completely

And he's 31 years older.

I just can't believe that you're serious.

I mean, I've heard of May -December romances, but you two wouldn't be on the

same calendar.

Murray, I have had some of the best times with your father that I have had

any man.

Oh, you don't have to tell me my father's a fun date.

He used to take me and my little pals to the circus every year.

Oh, in case you're interested, he gives a terrific piggyback ride.

Murray, any man who is that vital, dynamic, and energetic at three in the

morning shouldn't be put out to pasture.

Not while I'm riding.

Well, I'm sorry if I interrupted something.

Lou was kind enough to take me for a test drive.

In a new car, I'm thinking you're buying.

No, what kind of a car, Sue Ann?

Well, actually, it's a van.

It's a... It's a customized lavender number with retractable headlights and

little pink hearts all over the rear end.

Sounds just like the dress you wore to the Christmas party.

My headlights aren't retractable.

It's a terrific van. It's so roomy. If I had... If you had to, I could put a bed

in it. If you had to, you could put a bed on a motorcycle.

Murray.

Murray, Murray.

I understand your dad's in town.

Yeah. Does his forehead go back to his ankles, too?

My father happens to be a great -looking guy, Sue Ann. Ask Mary.

It's true.

As a matter of fact, Mary is dating him.

Oh, yeah?

Well, we've only known each other a couple of days, but yes,

I'm going out with him.

Well, how old is he? Well, I don't know. He's a... He's a sexagenarian.

It has a lovely ring to it.

You're dating a man in his 60s?

Gee, I didn't know you were interested in old guys, Mary.

Hey, you want me to see what my dad's doing this weekend?

Mr. Frantz. Oh, I'm sorry, Mary. Just a little joke.

Nothing wrong with a relationship between an older man and a younger

matter of fact, this could turn out to be good for me.

How? Well, Murray's been refusing to work late.

If you get serious with his father and get married, when he refuses to work

late, I'll get you to talk to him.

How could he say no to his mommy?

fun for you people?

Oh, come on, Mary. You know I'm just kidding. You know I don't think that.

I respect your judgment in this matter.

Thank you. Now, Mary, you can give your father a message from me. What is it,

Lou?

Mary,

never you mind what anybody says.

If you're attracted to this man, you go right on and go out with him.

No matter how old he is.

Of course, you may not get much action, but then you never did.

You know, I'm glad you're coming tonight, Mayor.

It'll give you a chance to meet Dad's friends and relatives.

And it'll give me a chance to discuss this problem with you and Dad together.

Problem? What problem?

There's no problem, Ted.

But you must know, Murray's upset because I'm dating his father, who's a

deal older than I am.

Everyone else has made some snide, cynical remark. Now it's your turn. Take

shot, Ted.

Honestly, anything wrong with it? Makes perfect sense to me.

That one hurt.

Yeah, that's horrific, nuts. I know you're going to love it, huh?

Oh, here, help yourself.

Plenty more.

Hi, everybody's been asking for you. Hi. Take your coats.

Hello, Marie. Hi, Mary.

There are people here I haven't seen since the war, and don't ask me which

Isn't it great to see them all again?

No.

Come on, Dad.

I'm afraid you'll have to excuse us, Mary. All right.

Well, why don't I introduce you around, huh? Okay. Oh, Ronnie.

This is Mary Richards.

Ronnie Williams. How do you do?

Mary. Ronnie and Dad used to be business partners. They ran a men's store in

Chicago. Yes, it was a real nice operation.

Too bad we had to give it up. What happened?

The Depression.

Of 1929?

I know.

We had no one to blame but ourselves.

Doug and I both voted Republican in 28.

I just think, Mary, you're probably the only girl on your block with a boyfriend

who voted for Herbert Hoover.

Boyfriend? Well, actually... Yeah, Mary's out with Dad tonight, Ron.

Well, I'll have to go and give Doug my hearty congratulations.

I guess he's got a lot more money than I thought he had.

Well, uh, how do you like the party so far, ma 'am? Don't think I don't see

you're doing, Murph. I'm only trying to be a gracious host, Mary.

Hey, let's go meet some more people, huh?

Murray. Oh, hiya, Joe.

Hi. I paid your dad. Get here. Oh, yeah, he's over there. Oh, Joe.

Have you met Mary?

Mary's dad's date for tonight.

Oh.

Hello, Mary.

Yeah.

Mary, this is Helen Holloway. Helen, this is Mary Richards.

How do you do? So nice to meet you.

Mary is dad's date for the evening, Helen.

Oh, that's nice, isn't it?

Helen and dad used to go together, too.

Yes, for about a year.

But we had to break up because my parents didn't approve of my going out

older man.

Well, it was very nice meeting you, Helen. It was nice meeting you, too,

jailbait.

Hi,

Mr. Grant.

Enjoying yourself, Mary?

So -so.

Want me to fix you a little drink?

Yeah, sure. Some bourbon on the rocks.

Okay. How about old granddad? I don't know what he has.

I'm sorry, Mr.

Grant. I just... I don't know how much more of this I can take.

What's the matter?

What's the matter?

Haven't you been listening?

All these people, all they can talk about is age.

Well, I didn't know this meant that much to you.

Well, it must.

Otherwise, why would I be so furious? It's just so frustrating having to take

it. Well, why do you have to take it?

Oh, come on. What am I going to do?

Well, you can walk into the middle of this room and tell people what's on your

mind. Well, you know I couldn't do anything like that. Okay, then you

stop going out with him because you're going to keep getting this from people

until you straighten them out.

You're right.

It's not only for yourself.

It's for Doug.

He's the butt of all these jokes, too, isn't he?

Shouldn't someone stand up for him, don't you think?

Excuse me, everybody. Could I please have your attention?

Everybody?

For those of you who don't know me, my name is Mary Richards, and I don't know

what I'm doing in the middle of a living room about to tell off people I hardly

know. What'd you say?

for those of you who don't know me, and I don't know what I'm doing in the

middle of a living room.

Tell off people.

I happen to be Doug's date tonight, and if the difference in our ages

shocks or bothers or bugs any of you, well, then that's your problem, but it's

not ours.

We're going to keep going out together just as often as we like, and right now

think we'd like to leave.

Doug, will you please take me to the home?

I just couldn't believe I was actually doing it, you know? I mean, I was

terrified, but now that it's over, I just feel so good.

I'm glad, Mary.

People never have that attitude about ages in Europe.

Right, right, but they had the attitude here, and the important thing is that I

was able to do something about it, you know?

Unusual for me, Doug. I never do things like that, ever.

You're a remarkable woman.

Did you see their faces? Oh, yes, yes, I did. I think I really got my point

across, don't you? Oh, yes, and then some.

Murray. Hi.

Look, I won't stay long. I just came to apologize.

What you said tonight was very true, and you're looking at the worst offender.

I'm glad you let me have it, Mary.

Thanks, Mary.

Dad.

Forget it, son.

No harm done.

I'm sorry I misbehaved, Dad.

And I'll understand if you ground me.

Good night.

Good night.

Well, this is incredible.

The one time I lose... my temper, everything comes out perfectly.

Could turn me into a real hothead.

Marvelous what's happened.

It really is.

You know something?

I may just take you up on that date to go to Stockholm.

Oh, oh, Mary.

What?

Well, it's just that you're making what I have to say much harder.

What you have to say?

Sit down, Mary.

Why?

Just do it, please.

Oh, no.

You're not going to... Yes, yes, there's another woman. Oh, no.

I met her in London last year, and I spent the summer with her.

I thought it was all over. But she called today, and just talking to her

realize how well our lives fit together.

I wanted to tell you before the party, but I just didn't get a chance.

I just gave the sermon on the mount back there.

And you're dumping me.

Mary, we've only been out twice.

I know, I know.

Well, I hope to see you again sometime.

Sure.

You call me the next time you're in Minneapolis.

Oh, I certainly will.

And I'll call you the next time I'm in Zurich.

Thanks for everything, Mary.

Thank you, Doug.

Doug?

Um... This is going to seem a little odd after the stand I took back there, but

how old is she?

37.

37? Yes.

My age?

Born in 1939?

That's right.

What month?

Uh, March.

Ah, I was born in April, which makes it all pretty clear.

What's that?

You obviously want a woman closer to your own age.

Doug, don't forget your hat.

I'm really sorry, Mary.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

You old coot.

Here's tonight's rundown, Mr. Grant.

Oh, good.

Mr. Grant, I need someone to talk to.

Doug and I broke up.

Oh.

That age thing was a little too much for you after all, huh? Well, I guess.

I mean, yeah, sure, there was the age thing, and... Well, what with his going

back to Europe to be with another woman, I just thought it was best to call a

halt to things.

The old guy dropped you.

Well, it's nice to know what you find amusing, Mr. Grant.

I cut my finger in the kitchen yesterday. It bled a lot. You like that?

Not as much as the old guy dropping you.

Sorry, I bought it. No, no. Come on, come on.

What did you want to say?

Well, I'd just like to think that when you have these experiences in life, you

can... Learn something from them. You know, and I was up a couple hours last

night, Mr. Grant, and I can't learn anything from this. I was wondering if

could help me sort it out.

Sure. Sure.

Let's review it.

You met a very old man.

And because you liked him, you risked the gossip and small talk and opened

heart to him.

And suddenly he hops a plane and picks up where he left off with some other

woman.

What can we learn from this?

Um... Even though it didn't work out, it's the experience

itself that's valuable.

No, that's not it.

Okay, um...

In spite of the fact that it ended abruptly, I got to know another human

And you're never the loser when you meet someone special.

Uh -uh.

Well, it makes sense.

No, no, no.

Here it is. Here it is.

You take two very different people. Uh -huh.

Different backgrounds.

Different outlooks. Right, right. One more than 30 years older than the other.

You bring them together, with all the odds against it, even though the whole

world ridicules it, it can still turn out to be an utterly worthless

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