All language subtitles for Mary Tyler Moore s05e09 Not a Christmas Story

Who can turn the world on with her
smile?

Who can take a nothing day and suddenly
make it all seem worthwhile?

Well, it's you, girl, and you should
know it.

With each glance and every little
movement you show it. Love is all alone,

need to waste it. You can never tell,
why don't you take it?

You're gonna make it after all.

Remember we were talking last week about
coming up with a new opening for Ted?

Yeah. Well, I think I've got something
here.

What do you think about it?

Good evening. This is Ted Baxter with
news from around the world and around

corner.

Yeah, I like it. That's pretty good.
Yeah, I think it works.

Yeah, maybe we'll try it out next week.

Try what out next week? Oh, well, it's a
new catchphrase that Murray came up

with to open the show. Oh, yeah? Can I
see it? Sure.

Good evening, this is Ted Baxter with
news from around the world and around

corner.

Hmm, I like it. I really like it.

I'm not so sure about it anymore.

No, I mean it, Murr. It's good. It's
better than good. It's me.

You son of a gun, you did it again.

Thanks.

Say, can I take this with me?

Take it home on the weekend and learn
it?

Wouldn't it be much better if I reversed
it? I mean, instead of saying around

the world and around the corner, I said
news from around the corner and around

the world?

Uh, no, I don't think so, Ted.

You don't think it would have been more
pizzazzed the other way?

No, Ted, I thought it was good the way
you said it the first time.

Yeah, well, you're probably right. Well,
see you Monday. Yeah, I said it is

good.

Well, that does it to me.

Got any plans for the weekend?

Oh, yeah.

Saturday, I've got to go to the dentist.
I've got to put up the store. warm

windows, and unclog a drain in the kids'
bathroom.

And then Sunday, I'm going to do some of
the unpleasant chores I've been putting

off.

I was right.

Right about what, Ted? This thing you
wrote. I read it both ways to Ollie the

Elevator Man.

I didn't try to influence him. I didn't
tell him which way I liked it. I just

let him make up his own mind. And he
said there was no question about it.

Around the corner and around the world
is the way it should be. Mary, can you

believe this?

Ted asked an elevator man to judge my
writing.

That's ridiculous. What experience has
he had? Are you kidding?

Ollie's been running that elevator for
17 years.

Mary, would you please say something to
Ted?

Sure. See you Monday, Ted.

All I want is to change a couple of
little words around.

Sure.

If it were up to you, the line would
read, not to be or to be.

What line?

Lou, just not so fast.

All right, Ted.

Have a... Is that better, Ted?

What I meant was, Lou, we need an
executive decision here.

Well, make it fast. I got a poker game.
What's the problem, Mary? Well, Murray

came up with a new opening for the show.
It goes, good evening, this is Ted

Baxter with news from around the world
and around the corner. Only Ted wants it

to be around the corner and around the
world.

That's it?

That's it.

Lou, around the corner has got to come
last. And Ollie and I say it goes first.

Ollie? The elevator man.

Who wants me to rewrite my copy because
of an elevator man?

Murray, that's who we're doing the news
for.

All the Ollie's in all the elevators all
over the world.

We're not doing it for people like us.

We already know the news.

Which way, Lou?

Let me see.

All right.

I've decided to let Mary decide.

And I will decide on Monday. Good night.

Come on, Marie. Be a good guy. Let me do
it my way. I'm sorry, Ted. Your way is

the wrong way.

Okay, it's your opinion and I respect
it. I only hope you're wearing

shoes. Why?

Because I'm going to tell Ollie. And
when I tell Ollie, you're going to be

walking down 23 flights of stairs.

Hey, I got you out of your bed. I'm
sorry.

No, that's okay. Listen, I was in there
too long anyway.

My fingers were getting all wrinkled.
Yeah.

It's funny how fingers do that. Other
parts of the body don't do that. Well,

I think the toes do, too.

Listen... No, you're right.

Murr, why don't you sit down and I'll
just put the... No, no, I'm only going

be a minute, Mayor. I just came from the
dentist and I thought I'd stop by and

apologize. For what?

Well, for that whole thing in the
office, you know, and changing the words

around. Oh, Murray, come on. You don't
have to apologize. I don't know why I

so upset, you know, over such a little
thing around the world, around the

corner. What difference does it make?
Yeah.

Murray, I'm standing here in this towel.
Oh, yeah, the towel. I'm sorry.

Yeah, I'll just go put some clothes on.
No, no, no, Mayor. Look, I just wanted

to tell you that I'm sorry it happened.

Boy, that's a great towel.

You know, I keep telling Marie to get
those kind, but she always gets those

thin, skimpy ones. I turn around my
waist, they always keep falling off.

You know, Murray, I really would feel...
so much more comfortable dressed.

Well, listen, I just wanted to tell you
that I'm sorry and that, you know,

whatever you decide, Mayor, around the
world or around the corner or around the

Mulberry Bush, whatever you decide, it's
all right with me. I mean, it's no big

deal. Actually, Murray, I've already
decided. Oh, really? Yeah, I think we're

going to try it the way you wrote it.
Oh, thank you, Mary.

Thank you.

The weather bureau says the snowstorm
should continue until tomorrow morning,

and we might get as much as 16 inches.

Wow. Mary, when you talk to the film
crew, remind them I want some good

of the storm.

Yeah, right. Tell them I want something
different this time.

I don't want any schoolboys having
snowball fights, or pretty girls making

snowmen with funny little pipes in their
mouths, or fat storekeepers shoveling

sidewalks. I want something unusual,
something imaginative.

Give it a little thought.

running through the spray of a fire
hydrant.

Hi, people.

Hi.

Isn't it simply beautiful out there?

I mean, snow always inspires such awe in
me.

Just consider one single snowflake
alone.

So delicate, so fragile, so ethereal.

Through the majestic force of nature,
they can screw up a whole city.

Uh, Suzanne, why are you wearing a Santa
Claus apron?

Oh, I just finished taping a special on
Christmas dinner in many lands.

I call it Yuletide Yummies for worldwide
tummies.

Christmas show? This is only November.

Oh, I always take my Christmas show in
advance.

way I can spend the season of joy and
goodwill with my only sister in Florida.

Oh, that's nice.

She's kind of a creep, but she's got a
pool.

I have cooked all these wonderful
Christmas dishes from different

I wanted to invite you all to come on
down after your broadcast.

And I thought between courses we could
sing some carols and play Christmas

games. Oh, there's this wonderful game
from Finland.

No.

For that, you need three little boys and
a peasant's wife.

But there are so many more.

Mary. Oh, gee, Sue Ann, that sounds like
a lot of fun, but I'm meeting someone

at the theater.

Oh, Mary.

Gee, I'd love to come, Sue Ann, but
we're having some people over for bridge

tonight.

Hello.

Well, I'm not doing anything tonight,
Sue Ann. Then you'll come.

No.

Grant, you should have gone. I bet you
made a wonderful dinner.

I think Lou's afraid he might be the
dessert.

Where you been? You're on the air in a
few minutes.

Lou, you won't believe what I've been
through.

My car got stuck in a snow drift.

Called a tow truck. It never came.

Georgette's still in the car waiting for
it.

You left Georgette all alone in the car?

Oh, that's all right. I told her she
could play the radio.

And I had to walk 15 blocks in the snow.
Look at my hands. I think I got

frostbite. What happened? Your mother
pinned your mittens to your mother's

Here's your copy. You better get into
the studio.

Any word from the Board of Education
about closing the school tomorrow? No,

I'll check with them again before the
show. Oh, Murr, wait a minute.

You didn't change the opening around. It
still says, around the world and around

the corner.

Well, I didn't have to change it, Ted.
Mary decided to do it that way.

Yeah, I thought it over, and I decided
that we would do it the way Murray wrote

it. Well, Murray may have written it,
and you may have thought it over, but

the one that has to say it.

And I can't say it.

No, I can't.

But it sounds right. It's not me.

If it's one thing I've learned, it's got
to be me.

You're right.

It's a dirty job, but somebody's got to
do it.

All right, look, we don't have time to
argue about this. I'll just cross it

and we'll talk about it tomorrow.

Well, I open the show.

Just open it the same way you've been
doing it for eight years.

Good evening, this is Ted Baxter with
tonight's news.

Let me write that down.

Yeah. Mary, is that the way you make a
decision?

Oh, Murray. Now, you're either the
associate producer of this show or

not. And if you are, I think you should
start acting like one. All right.

Ted, Mr. Grant has given me the
authority to decide which is the right

this opening. And I have decided which
is the right way. And that is the way

are going to do it. You are going to say
this is Ted Baxter with news from

around...

that's the way you're going to say it.

That's the way you're going to say it,
please.

Please.

Okay.

Is that the way you exercise authority?

Please? What happened to pretty please?

Oh, come on, Mary, what do you want?

Excuse me.

I'm sorry to interrupt, but could anyone
tell me why our show was on the air and

Ted isn't?

Mary was...

Have you ever enjoyed our show so much?

Good evening.

This is Ted Baxter with tonight's news
from around the corner and around the

world. I'll be right back right after
this commercial message.

I knew he'd do it his way. I knew it. I
knew it. I knew it. Well, someone please

tell me what's going on here. I'll tell
you what's going on here.

I'm quitting.

Oh, come on, Murray. You're not going to
quit over two dumb little...

Oh, say, Murray.

And then Ted read it his way, and, well,
you saw the rest.

And that's why Murray's quitting?

Oh, come on, Mr. Graham. Murray's not
going to quit.

He wouldn't quit over a silly thing like
that. I know Murray.

Murr! Excuse me. May I use that phone?

What do you mean? It's your phone. It
used to be my phone. It's not anymore.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Use the phone.

Hey, Murr.

Are you not serious?

Hello, Marie?

Look, I can't get my car out of the
parking lot. Yeah, and the police say

take till midnight to clear the streets.

So don't wait up.

Okay, honey. Good night.

They're keeping the cars off the road.
We get that story on the air? How do I

know? Ask somebody who works here.

I guess I'd better stay here for a
while.

All right, I'll have some coffee.

Yes, Murray, you can have some coffee.

Thank you.

Murray.

Murray.

Murray, Murray, Murray, Murray.

It used to be my chair. It's not
anymore.

Oh, this is just terrific.

I said, Mary.

I just couldn't do something I knew in
my heart was wrong. But that's not the

point. I made a decision. I know, and I
respect you for it, Mary.

But it was a lousy decision.

It was the right decision if she had
stuck to it. I was simply trying to get

show on the air.

You could have fooled me.

Well, Mr. Grant, if you think you can
find someone else to do my job...

Mary, I ain't enough for one day.

You look at all the trouble you've
caused just because of two stupid words.

I just hope you'll say...

Christmas, whatever happened to
Thanksgiving?

Listen, Sue Ann, I really don't feel
like that sort of thing. Yeah, I'm not

really in the mood for any kind of
Christmas dinner.

Now, you're going to have to eat
sometime.

The choice is yours.

You can have a package of stale peanut
butter crackers from the vending machine

or a sumptuous eight -course banquet
with me featuring souffle toilageant,

ville à la grecque, and enough free
booze to knock you all on your...

Christmas dinner.

Oh, Ted, just once, couldn't we please
pay the full price and have it on

December 24th?

Mr. O'Toole.

next to Georgette.

Mary, you can sit next to Ted.

Sue Ann, why don't you sit next to Ted?

All right, I'll sit next to Ted. Lou,
you sit here next to me.

And I'll just take my place here.

Oh, pretty hats. What are they for, Sue
Ann?

Well, when I taped my special, each time
I created a different dish from a

different country, I wore a different
hat.

And I thought it would be such fun if we
each... each wore one during dinner.

I'm a little Dutch girl.

Oh, and I'm a little Scottish girl.

Here, Ted, put this one on. I'm not
wearing any hats. Come on, where's your

Christmas spirit?

It's not Christmas.

We're not children.

Well, of course you're not.

But if you don't put on your hats, you
can't have any dinner.

Now, isn't that fun?

Georgette, maybe you'd lend me a hand.
The first dish is from Mother Russia.

Raised carp in honey and raisin sauce.

While Georgette and I are serving up the
fish, why don't the rest of you turn to

your Christmas songbooks?

Page 23.

It's not Christmas. It's November. We
don't want to sing any Christmas carols.

Oh, it's all right, Lou. They're non
-denominational.

Who elected you spokesman for the rest
of us, Lou? If we want to sing, we'll

sing. And I want to sing, so let's...

A poet.

This is Swimming.

Everything was delicious.

I'm just sorry I was in such a bad mood.

And I'd like to apologize.

That goes for me, too. I was mean, rude,
and rotten all night.

Oh, Lou, don't apologize.

You were just being yourself.

Mary, I'd like to apologize to you, too.

I have a feeling everybody would like to
apologize to everybody.

Yeah, you're right, Mary.

How could we have been so lousy to each
other?

And on Christmas?

of all things.