Original subtitles

300 points. But you were close, though, Lisa, with 149.

Well, at least I used real words. You got 75 points for majornly.

So, it's an adverb. They're allowed.

Okay, then tell me what it means.

To act in a majorn -like fashion.

Oh, can I borrow that meditation book that Molly gave you at support group?

sure. Did you like it? Oh, I loved it. Are you kidding?

Boy, without it, we would have had a tippy table.

You know, if you actually read this book, it would help you to sleep.

Well, I already have a book to help me sleep. I'm reading Colin Powell's

autobiography. I'm on page 210, and he's five.

Murphy, this was so much fun.

Yeah, I had a good time, too. You know, just when you think you're too old to

make new friends, you do.

Yeah, I know. Wait a minute, you're not that old. Well, I'll have you know I'll

be 30 on Tuesday.

Oh, well, that's kind of a big deal.

Tell me about it.

When I was in high school, I thought that by the time I was 30, I would be

married. Mrs. Wally Tuttle.

Who?

He was the captain of the football team.

He's this big, adorable lug.

Well, what, did he take you to the senior prom or something?

Well, how could he? I never talked to him. Not that I talked to my prom date,

either.

Why didn't you talk to Wally? I mean, a guy named Wally couldn't have been that

unapproachable. Well, he was three years older than me, you know. I mean, the

high... school food chain thing or Fathomor having a crush on a senior.

He had a Mustang convertible. I had headgear.

Insurmountable odds.

Anyway, thank you so much. Well, I had a great time.

You know what, Lisa?

I'm going to take you out to lunch on your birthday.

Yeah? Okay, cool.

But no singing waiters.

I can't promise.

No birthday tiaras or mylar balloons. No gorillagram.

We'll see.

And no expensive presents. That I promise.

So then, where do we put Murphy's John Glenn piece?

First.

First? Why should she go first?

Hola, mis amigos.

I am back from Cuba.

So, how'd it go?

You know, the promo department is champing at the bit. Frank Fontana's

Cuba. Oh, I'll tell you something. It was amazing. The food, the music, the

people. And you know what?

Castro himself took us around the island. Yes, yes, yes, Frank. But what

about...

What was that, Jim? Nothing, Frank.

I think what Jim means is, did you bring back any Cuban contraband, you know, of

the cigar family? Oh, but that would be wrong. Oh, yes, terribly wrong. So,

Frank, may I see you in my office after the meeting? I have this thing that you

wanted to see.

Oh, you two are so bad at this, Frank.

Just give him the cigars.

Well, actually, I have got them right here.

Very clever.

And it's taped to your chest.

Frank,

did you bring me something nice back from Cuba? I have to give my friend Lisa

birthday present.

Yeah, actually, I did. I got you this pen.

When you turn it upside down, Castro's pants fall down.

Hey, hey, hey, that's disgusting. I'm confiscating this.

idea what to get her. Oh, you're talking about Lisa from your support group?

Yeah, and she turns 30 on Tuesday.

She had dinner at your house the other night. What did you two talk about?

Sometimes people drop subtle hints.

Well, let's see. We played Scrabble, and then we played that game I made up, Six

Degrees of Rodney McDowell. She really wasn't very knowledgeable.

And then she talked about this guy she had a crush on in high school.

Well, if she can't have the pen, it's mine.

I know.

She's going to love this.

See, Lisa missed her chance with that guy in high school.

And I'm going to find him.

I'm going to find Wally Tuttle.

How do you know she wants to see him?

Well, of course she does.

I mean, when I was in my high school production of The Music Man, I was cast

one of the pick -a -little -talk -a -little ladies. I was, in fact, quite

In my high school, we did Oklahoma.

I was curly.

Jim, I'm talking.

Anyway, this incredibly handsome guy named Dennis played The Music Man, and I

had such a crush on him. So I know what it's like to have unrequited love. In

our production of 808, he was played by a lovely girl, Lois Bedini.

I heard she got heavy.

But Lisa would love it if I could find this guy for her.

The Wally Tuttle search begins now.

Where's Wally?

You know, every now and then I do believe that this whole experience with

cancer... has had a positive impact on Murphy's personality.

I agree. I mean, look at this.

She's actually going out of her way to do something nice for someone she hardly

even knows. You know, I actually saw her hold the elevator for someone the other

day. Oh, that's so sweet.

Before we get all misty -eyed, let's remember that this is the very same

who hollered at a Salvation Army Santa just because the kettle was blocking the

entrance to the donut shop.

You know what we should do? Yes, get back to work. No, we should find

lost love.

What? Well, I think she made it pretty clear that she wants us to find that

music man of hers. You know, I think she's right.

And let's face it, she's had a tough year. She deserves something special,

And besides, it would be fun, kind of like a scavenger hunt. I'll contact her

high school. I'll call her father. I'll dig through the archives.

While you're out there, why don't you sit here and find me a job? Because when

people tune in on Wednesday night, I'm going to need one because there won't be

any show.

Just got to get those grades up, right, buddy?

Wally Tuttle?

Murphy Brown.

Wow, Murphy Brown, this is great.

Boy, I had a tough time tracking you down.

Tracking me down, you did.

Do you have a moment?

Ah, geez, you know, now's not really a good time. I've got to get to practice.

Well, this is the thing, sir. Look, Miss Brown, maybe after the season.

Wally? Hey, hey, you can't come in here.

Don't look at me like that. I have a son.

Stay away from me.

From that FYI show, whenever you track down somebody at work, they always end

in jail. That's not why I'm here.

Is that you?

Get back in the shower. You're not done.

Look, look, look, look. If this is about Ricky Markham, he's 7 '1", and he's

only a freshman.

Wally. Okay, I bought him socks.

You want to go after somebody, go after Macy's. They charge $11 for sweat socks.

Wally? Yes?

You remember a girl from high school named Lisa Barlow?

Cheerleader. Three years younger than you.

So, Kate, did you find anything good on Murphy yet? Did you know she was the

biggest baby ever born in the state of Pennsylvania?

There was a movement.

To put it on the license plate.

Welcome to the Keystone State, home of the biggest baby.

Her parents got a year's supply of free baby food. She ate it in a month.

This isn't good dirt.

You know, we can use this against her. I mean, if we have to.

Which we will.

So why don't we think of this sooner, Frank?

Have you found anything yet? Yeah.

This is my copy of G .I. Jane.

I gave this to her about 11 months ago. She's supposed to return it. This is

going to cost me like 100 bucks.

All right, Jim, what took you so long?

I smoked that Cuban cigar.

I got dizzy, couldn't drive, took 45 minutes for my head to clear.

Do you have any more?

Never mind that. Did you get it? Affirmative.

Murphy's sophomore yearbook.

Give me, give me, give me. Oh, quick, look in the back. That's where the

extracurricular activities are. Ah,

there it is. The music man.

Harold Hill, played by Dennis...

Ah, he is cute.

See if they have his parents' address in the back. No, no, wait, wait, wait.

Let's do what Murphy looks like. There she is.

Oh, look at that sweet little face.

How is it someone that angelic could turn into Murphy Brown?

Wait a minute. That's not her.

That's her.

Oh.

Are you kidding? Phil's is famous for his food. You've never heard of it? Oh,

no, I've heard of Phil. My nutritionist goes on and on about it.

Was there really a Phil?

Well, there was.

Unfortunately, he died.

So, all of the things on the menu, the little hearts by them are the healthy

choices.

Fried shrimp, fried zucchini, peanut butter cheesecake.

Whose heart is this, Phil?

Harvey, thank you for taking me out on my birthday.

My pleasure.

Uh, so why don't we order? The food really is pretty good. Oh, waiter?

Oh, darling boy, I need some bubble water.

I'll tell your waitress. You be my waiter.

So, any big birthday plans tonight?

Oh, no. Just probably a movie with some friends.

I'm not really big on birthdays.

Go away. We're not ready to order.

I am.

I'm not going.

Can I take your order?

Oh, we're not ready yet. Yes, we are. I'm starving.

What?

Winger, do you have any specials today? My friend here is particularly

interested in something on the healthy side.

Oh, that's okay. I'll just order off the menu. Listen to the specials. Waiter,

what are the specials?

Uh, it's, uh, p -p -p -pumpkin soup.

I'll have that. No, don't have that. That's what kills Phil.

Don't you have any other specials? You have a nice speaking voice, doesn't he?

Have a nice speaking voice. Yeah, I'll have a salad.

You know what? We're not ready to order yet.

Murphy! We'll just be a few more minutes. Why don't you tell us your

then when we're ready, we can call you.

Wally.

Wally.

That's a nice name, Wally.

What's your last name, just in case there's another Wally?

Wally Tuttle.

That's funny. I knew a Wally Tuttle.

How's your grilled snapper?

Hi, Lisa.

You're a waiter?

Oh,

no, no. I found him. This is your present. Happy birthday. Sit down,

Hi.

Hi.

So, Lisa, aren't you happy to see Wally, to talk to Wally?

Happy to see you, Orangey. Tell Lisa you're happy to see me.

You look great, Lisa.

Well, thanks. You're partial to the gypsy look.

Actually, I am. I get to see your eyes.

I've always liked your eyes.

You did?

Well, I'll let you two catch up.

Thank you.

Happy birthday.

Oh, great, great. You're here. You're here.

Frank, Frank, look, I got Wally and Lisa together. I did that.

That's my handiwork.

There. Now you've been touched by an angel, too.

That's great.

That's really great. But look, we've got to leave here right away.

Well, why? Why, Frank? Where are we going?

We're going to Delaware. It's urgent.

Well, Delaware is never urgent.

Well, it is when Joe Biden is going to announce that he's running for president

and he wants to do it live on FYI. But more importantly, he's going to announce

Gephardt as his running mate. Is Gephardt taking my advice and dyeing his

eyebrows? Even a little pencil would help.

No, no, no. Oh, this doesn't sound right. It seems like a publicity stunt.

Okay, fine. You stay here. I'll go get the story. It'll be just great.

Wait a minute. You're leaving something out, aren't you? You're downplaying the

story because you don't want me to go. Well, well, I... I'm a little more

than that, Frank.

Next time, try to be a little less obvious.

Busted. She fell for it.

We're going to wait now. Someone's going to have to drive. I rode my Harley.

What made it?

I don't see them. Where are our newsmakers, Frank?

Someone put us up to this, you know. The same people who straightened Paula

Jones' teeth are behind it. I know it.

Come on. Come all this way. Let's just give them another few minutes. Come on.

Come on.

Want to miss your interview with Joe Biden?

Or Dick Gephardt.

Every jerk's supposed to show up, but I've got news for you. He'll be

sooner than one of those other two.

What are you guys doing here?

We hear they have really good beer soaked.

All right, knock it off. What's going on?

Ladies and gentlemen, our next performer has performed up and down the eastern

corridor from Connecticut.

to parts of South Carolina and as far west as Ohio, to please give a warm

Wilmington welcome for the musical stylings of Mr.

Dennis. Hey!

Hey, little girl, comb your hair, check your makeup, and we will walk through

that door.

Don't take the puzzle with a wing on your finger.

You needn't try any...

Remember that guy from the music, man? Hey, who's touched by an angel now, huh?

Of all the things you've ever done for me, this is the one you're going to

regret the most.

It was Corky's idea.

A little girl, comb your hair, check your makeup, soon

it's...

guest in the house tonight, someone who needs no introduction, but I'm going to

give her one anyway.

Murphy Brown.

Never my leading lady, but she was always in the room.

Come on up on stage, will you, Murphy?

It's so great to see you again.

Come on.

There you go, right there.

Oh, you still got it.

Murphy, we met a long, long time ago. Why don't you tell the people where that

was? No. Come on.

I picture this.

He's a... Billy, could you give me a little back then music, okay?

Yeah, here we go.

All right,

where were we? I'm sorry.

I was just leaving. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Picture this, picture this.

He's a high school senior, star of The Music Man.

She's an apple -cheeked sophomore, member of the chorus.

She carries a big torch for him.

Can you guess who this cast of characters was, ladies and gentlemen?

got it. They got it.

And, of course, the crazy part was that he never knew until her friends called

him just a few short days ago and told him her secret and begged him to receive

her.

He's going to kill us. Not me. I've got a passport and a fake mustache in the

car.

I've written this special medley just for you.

Here you go, have a seat.

But I'm dedicating it to all the lonely ladies out there who are dreaming of

finding their unrequited love.

Because if Murphy Brown can find me, believe me, nothing's impossible.

I want to be in a room that's crowded and well -lit. Right. Let's go.

Thank you, Murphy. That was the money shot.

Boy, I can't believe you're just as pretty as you were in high school.

It's good to see you again. It's a real kick, you know?

Yeah, yeah, it's a kick.

Well, it's been an evening. See you.

I was thinking, of all our classmates, we're the only two who really made it.

prize was in your graduating class.

Yeah, for chemistry.

I should really be going.

Murphy, Murphy.

You happy?

No, but I will be as soon as I get on the turnpike.

It's always good to go home, isn't it?

Murphy, can a senior talk to a sophomore, give her a little piece of

As long as you don't sing it.

Gotta save the pipes.

I've got nine shows tomorrow.

I want you to be happy.

And here's my prescription.

Get on with your life.

For God's sake, stop living in the past.

Now, you've done very well for yourself, as have I.

Are you comparing our careers?

Okay, okay, that was unfair.

People pay to see me. People can watch you on TV for nothing, but... I think

what I want to say... Yes, Dennis?

What do you want to say?

Because then I'll... say what I want to say.

I'm a married man.

I don't wear the ring in the act because, well, it's all about dreams,

It's time to wake up, Murphy Brown.

Are you finished?

I'm so glad you came here tonight.

You know, I bet you look around you and you think, yeah, he's always had it this

good.

Well, I'll tell you what. I was flying. I was sitting on top of the world.

And then the bottom dropped out.

I had a heart attack.

Man, do they hurt.

So I was thinking, was this heart attack a wake -up call?

Was the big man, or chick, telling me...

And then your friends call me out of the blue.

And you show up here, loving me.

And it's pretty clear I'm not supposed to pack it in.

Yet.

So what did you want to tell me, Mary?

You... were really good in that production

of The Music Man.

And...

That's the way I'll always remember you.

Well, you know what I'll always remember about you in high school?

Me.

Standing on that stage, singing my show -stopping tune, and you watching from

the wings.

Young lady, I'm going to take you back to a time when that was all still

possible. Bill, play that tune the ladies like so much, will you?

Seventy -six trombones.

Me and Mrs.

Carter Shepley.