Original subtitles

"London, a city built of stone,

"and iron, and concrete, and steel.

"Reassuringly sturdy.

"Sturdy like our love,

"now that we've decided to remain apart.

"If it is to survive, love cannot be crazy, or hot,

"or sweaty, or naked..."

"...but instead must be practical."

"It is with this practical love,

"this love from afar,

"where we can each prosper.

"A heart...

"A heart that beats slowly,

"a heart that beats with purpose.

"My sensible heart."

Er...

- Hi. Thank you. Er... - Hi.

Er, Henry. Thank you for coming to the reading.

Ah, no. Well, it was lovely.

Do you... Do you work here?

No. God, no.

No. No, no, no, no. No, no.

I'm... I'm an author.

That was actually my book that I was reading.

Oh, my God. Okay, wait.

You're a writer? That's... Wow.

- Yes. - Okay. That's amazing.

Yes, well, it's just the one book.

It's The Sensible Heart,

- it's called. - Oh, okay.

Yeah. I mean, what's it about?

Well, it's about a man and a woman.

Oh, okay.

- And, er... - So, it's a love story?

- Yes. Yes, it is a love story. - Yeah?

And does it get a little saucy?

No. No.

Er... No.

Not every story about love has to be about sex.

You know, someone once wrote

that chastity is the body in the soul's keeping,

and that's how I feel, so...

Right. Yeah.

What!

- Yeah. - I mean, is it...

Is it selling well, the book?

- Jill? How's it selling? - Hmm?

I... I think it needs a little longer on the table.

The sign's not necessary.

Henry, the book came out six months ago.

- Yes? - Two people bought it,

one of them being you.

And you're still using it

- as a chat-up line. - I'm...

I'm not trying to... I'm not trying...

Okay. Well, you know, I'm gonna...

I'm gonna go. But it was really nice to meet you.

- You, too. - And good luck with it.

- Did you want a copy? - Um, nah, it's fine.

- Want my advice? - No, not particularly.

Do something else with your life, Henry.

Get a real job.

Go on dates. Move on. Stop talking

about your bloody book.

Wow.

- Ooh. - Now what?

Okay. Well, my publisher, who I haven't heard

from in a long, long time...

Oh, she dropped you, didn't she?

No. No, actually, no.

She wants me to go in and see her now.

Brutal. She's going to do it in person.

Just take the sign down.

- No. - Yeah.

- No. - Please.

It's staying, Henry.

Hi.

Er...

Hello? Are you... Are you Jen?

Yeah.

Great.

Erm...

Henry Copper.

You published my book, The... The Sensible Heart.

Henry?

- Yes. - Yes.

Don't move.

Please take a seat.

You look more like an air traffic controller

than a publisher.

Hilarious.

Well, with all the screens and whatnot.

Okay. You're Henry Cooper?

- Copper. - Copper, yes.

- Yes. You sent me a text. - I did.

- Um, I hope everything's okay. - Take a look at this.

"So boring I wished

"I'd watched paint dry instead."

Oh, no, no, no. That's one of your reviews.

Oh, well, that's just one person's opinion, so...

Mm, no. There are several similar reviews, some worse.

Okay.

Take a look at that.

Picture of me?

Your book is number one.

Er... Erm...

Er, what?

The Sensible Heart is a hit.

It is number one in the bestsellers.

Sorry, what? I can't quite believe this.

Well, believe it, Henry. The figures don't lie.

I... I mean, I... I knew it. I knew it. I knew it.

I knew people in this country had taste.

It's not this country.

Yeah, no, because there's something

that I remember E. M. Forster said.

- He said... - How about remembering

something I just said? It's not this country.

It's Mexico.

Your book is a bestseller in Mexico, Henry.

Felicidades.

Mexico.

The official Mexican fiction chart,

number one, Henry Cooper. Copper.

So, my book's Spanish?

When did that happen? How did that happen?

I don't know how to explain this to you, Henry.

I think your Mexican publisher saw that it was in English,

and decided that would make it harder

for Mexican readers.

So, they had it translated by, um...

"Translated by M. F. Rodríguez"?

Yes.

- Well, whoever he is... - Mm-hmm.

...I hope he's managed to capture

all the nuances of the story.

Yeah.

"Oh, to be in England now that April's there.

"And whoever wakes in England sees some morning unaware."

I wish you'd knock.

I did knock. This...

...is knocking.

Come on, Grandpa,

I need to clean in here before taking Diego to school.

You can read your poetry in the living room.

Come on.

Mexico.

Well, does that mean people know me there?

The book, yeah. You, not so much.

Uh, apparently, you have zero presence on social media.

That has to change if we're gonna take this global.

Are you not engaging with followers?

- Engaging? What? - You are on Facebook?

Twitter?

Instagram?

I have a Linkedln.

Okay, Henry.

Okay, I'm going to set you up with some accounts.

Um, people aren't coming to you,

so you have to go to them.

- It's all about engagement. - I'm a... I'm a writer.

Yeah, a writer who needs to get his ass to Mexico

and start plugging that book in person and online.

You do this right, this could be just the start for you.

But...

Henry, do you want to pay your rent?

Yes.

Then let's build the hype

till they're begging you for a sequel.

Go make us some real money off this thing.

Okay, that's your schedule for the book tour.

- My book tour? - Of Mexico,

just three cities and you leave in...

tomorrow.

- As in? - Tomorrow.

Okay, you know what? Take this.

It's on an international plan.

You have to start building a massive following

for the book on social, okay?

I want to see cute, casual pictures on Instagram.

Be hilarious on Twitter.

Express your true self on TikTok.

My true self?

Just sell the book, Henry.

Diego?

Do you want to take the Rubik's Cube?

Yes.

Let's go, son.

Where is he?

Maybe he forgot.

Do I have to go with him?

Yes, son. He is your dad.

Ah.

Here he is.

Your role model.

Hi!

What's up, Max?

Hello, Antonio.

How are you, little man?

Hi Dad!

Not a little man any more, you have grown up a lot...

You're so grown up! Look!

It's cool, right?

It's super cool, Dad.

You're not too old to play with small cars, right?

No! It's very cool!

It has a helmet and the full gear for an adventure.

- Thanks, Dad. - Cool, little man.

Don't you think this might be too much?

I bought him something simple for his birthday.

It's only a small car...

...it's really not a big deal.

Besides, it's not that expensive.

Okay.

I have to leave now.

Remember, try not to give him candy...

...that he needs to brush his teeth, and is in bed at 8.

What?

Oh María, it's just that...

A job came up.

No, come on! No...

It's a very important recording session

in San Miguel de Allende.

Also, it's important for my reputation!

You have one of those?

Gosh, Max.

How do you manage to be that rude to me

and still make me laugh?

So what do I do? What do I do?

- I don't know. - I can't take Diego with me.

I don't know what to do.

But I can't quit either...

...please?

I promise this is the last time I let you down.

- Ok? - Mm-hmm.

Thank you.

Son...

I have to leave.

I'll come get you after and we'll have a great time...

...and I'll bring something back for you from my trip.

Thank you.

I love you little man!

See you, Max. Thank you.

I owe you one.

No, no, you owe me like three hundred!

Let's make it four hundred!

I'll make it up to you later, OK?

Thank you!

Well, I've still got this work trip!

So, what do we do?

Well, I can stay with my great grandpa.

Of course, I can take care of him.

No, no. The two of you alone

are more dangerous than a monkey with a gun.

I am eighty years old.

Exactly.

Come on, go pack!

Oh... Er...

Pervert.

No. Er... Sorry.

It's fine.

Gracias.

Oh.

Thank you.

- Hola. - Ah, Mr. Rodríguez?

Yes.

It's a pleasure to meet you...

- Nice to meet you. - ...Señor Cooper.

This is my family, Diego and María.

- Hi. - Hola.

Er, it's Señor "Copper," Henry Copper.

I'm sorry.

I made the card! I made it!

Sorry. What did he say?

He made the card.

Oh! Er, gracias. Muchas gracias.

Okay, we better hurry.

We've got 30 minutes to get to your event.

My what, sorry?

Your event, see?

It's in Spanish, Mama.

- What? - It's in Spanish.

Oh yes, of course.

I translate for you.

Oh, well, thank you.

Er, so, what does it say?

- What? - Email?

You... You said you'd translate for me.

Oh, no, no, no. I translate for you.

I'm the translator of your book.

You're M. F. Rodríguez?

Sí. María Fernando Rodríguez.

- Okay. - Okay?

- Okay. - Let's go.

Órale.

Let's go.

Diego, vamos.

Diego?

Gracias.

María, how does it feel

to be related to a great translator?

Huh?

Yeah.

It's... not that funny.

Why is she laughing?

This English man thought I translated his book.

That's very funny because you don't do anything!

I'm... I'm... I'm sorry I thought my book

was translated by your father, all right?

My "father"? He's my grandfather.

So, either he's very young-looking,

or I'm an old hag.

Hey, Diego.

I'm a hag!

Careful!

- Hey! - Watch your step!

Do you have your eyes stuck up your butt, dude?

What's up with that guy?

So, what did you think of my book?

Okay, here we are.

Everybody out.

Come on, come on.

You really do that without a seatbelt?

Come on Diego, let's get out.

Help your great grandpa.

Yes, help him, help him.

The car seat!

The seat!

The seat, please!

Why are all these people here?

Well, they like your book, I guess.

So, just get up on stage and do your thing.

Oh, no. I can't. I can't.

I mean, I don't speak a word of Spanish.

Oh, yeah.

Um, okay, okay. Uh...

Yes, just next to it.

Huh.

Oh. Hi.

Please welcome

the author of El Corazón Sensible...

Henry Copper!

Er... Oh.

Thank you. Gracias.

Welcome, Mr Copper.

First I'd like to thank you, on behalf of everyone here,

for this gift...

...this delicious book.

Um... They like the book.

Well, er...

Thank you. Thank you very much.

I would like to start, if I may, by asking you...

...how did you get the idea for this torrid romance?

Okay.

She wants to know where you got the idea.

- The idea? Erm... - Mm-hmm.

Erm...

Well, I guess the answer to that, erm,

is, well, it... it's a mixture.

It's a mixture of one's experience

and, er, one's imagination.

Oh!

Experience and imagination.

Ooh!

Okay, okay, okay.

You must be very imaginative then...

and very experienced!

Of course, when I say this I'm thinking

of one particular part of the book.

Do you mind if I read it out loud?

- Uh... - Er...

You know what? We would love to.

But Mr. Copper is a busy man.

He has many things to do... novels to write...

OK. OK. I'll just read it quickly. Just quickly.

Chapter nine,

the morning after Claire meets Martin.

She's going to read.

We've all read it, what's the point?

"Every fibre of Claire's being was transformed...

...Martin's powerful desire

had overcome her fear of love."

Claire was transformed.

What, that... that's it?

It... It sounded like there was a bit more to it.

I'm paraphrasing.

Right.

You describe the workings

of desire, of lust, so well.

Mm.

It's incredible.

And best of all it's like you understand what it is to be a

man and a woman, sexually possessed.

You're great.

Gracias. Thank you.

May I read my favourite part?

Another one? Dear God.

I am going to read THE scene.

Ooh!

"That night

he came to her again, charged like a stallion."

"Claire, he said,

we will always long for each other's touch,

each other's taste,

but it will always be forbidden."

Yeah, mm...

That night he came to her again.

"Claire," he said, "We will always be together.

"We will always be two minds in one body,

- "two halves of one coin." - Okay.

"But tonight let us forget the rules...

...tonight we are unashamed, we are beasts...

...beasts in the desert heat."

"Claire, he said, tonight...

And that?

Yeah, um...

Um...

But... Yeah.

- Could someone else please? - No.

I can do it.

"Tonight, we are like beasts in the desert."

"In the desert heat."

Beasts in heat?

That's... That's quite a free translation.

Erm...

- Please go on. - Okay.

"Claire. Tonight...

"Claire, tonight..."

"Tonight, Claire, we part..."

"...never to meet again. The end."

That's not what it says!

You don't speak English at all.

She's making it up!

What?

Oh so now we're all translators!

- She's a liar! - Yes! Translate it properly!

Yes! Translate it properly, you cow!

Hey, hey... a little respect, no?

I mean, I mean...

Perhaps you would like to refresh

your memory of the text.

Of course. Yeah.

But...

What the hell is with this woman?

It's her job...

No, no, I'll read it. I'll read it!

Okay.

"Tonight we're unashamed.

"Tonight we're beasts in the desert heat.

"Tonight we...

"We fudge."

Er, sorry, I didn't quite...

Louder!

"Tonight...

"we fuck!"

That's better!

Erm...

I'll just...

Bravo, bravo!

What was that all about?

I think your mother is about to get into trouble.

What was that?

Er...

What's going on, with the poster?

And why are people sending me naked videos of themselves?

What have you done to my book?

What...?

I made some changes.

"Some changes"?

Okay, what other parts have you changed?

Only the boring parts.

Okay. It...

It sounds like you've rewritten the whole book.

Like I say, only the boring parts.

Hey, I'm not finished.

Do you know how long it took me?

Five years of writing, rewriting,

waiting for the right phrase.

I think maybe you waited too long.

Listen, and then you came along,

and you turned it into a bucket of filth.

- "Filth"? - Yes, filth.

Miss Rodríguez,

my characters do not have sex, all right?

Of course, of course not.

A writer writes from experience.

Oh.

Do you know what? I can't believe you're defending

this monstrous sack of pornography.

- It is not pornography. - It is pornography!

Claire and Martin make love once, just like your parents.

Don't bring my parents in...

I can't believe this. I'm going mad.

Go on. Tell me, what else have you changed?

Come on, what have you changed exactly?

Well, I took out some of the long descriptions.

What long descriptions?

You spend a page describing a bicycle

and a sentence describing the heroine.

But that... that... that's...

And I also improved the grammar.

There's nothing wrong with my grammar.

So you say, Mr. Writer?

And I made Claire's husband gay.

Well, I made it clear he was gay.

He's not gay.

- Why would you make him? - Come on.

Come on, he was always gay.

He just wasn't comfortable coming out to you.

Oh. Oh-ho-ho!

Pedro! So happy you're here now!

Hi María!

Here he is, the love guru himself.

- Hello. - Hello.

I am Pedro, your publisher. Welcome to Mexico City.

I got you on TV.

But I have a publisher. Jen?

No, no, no. Jen is your British publisher.

I am your Mexican publisher.

We are going to have a swell time. Come on.

- Did you say "TV"? - Yes. Are you excited?

Where were you?

T... TV interview?

We were just talking, Grandpa.

You're going to have fun.

I'll explain later. Get in! Get in!

Come on.

Do you know what? I have one question. One Question.

Why did you make Claire's husband gay?

- Do you not like gay? - Ugh. Typical.

No, that's... Yes, I do like gay.

I... I...

But Claire's husband isn't gay.

It gives Claire a motive

- for the affair. - "Affair"?

After she finds her husband in bed with Andrew.

Andrew? Who's Andrew?

Martin's brother.

Martin doesn't have a brother.

Well, he does now.

I made him a sexy plumber.

I had to make chapter six more interesting.

What was wrong with chapter six?

Nothing happens.

Like, in chapter seven, and chapter five,

and chapter three, and chapter one,

and the entire book, nothing happens. Nothing.

Stop the car.

Stop the car!

Damn English.

Shoo, shoo.

Mama, shouldn't you say it's your book?

It seems really unfair.

Welcome to the entire history of women, Diego.

Hey.

I'm sorry, okay?

I'm sorry.

But nothing happens. Nobody does anything.

Nobody says anything.

Everybody wanders around, like,

"Can I just please have a glass of water

"while I describe this beautiful bicycle?"

And then, boom.

I mean, well, no boom. Boom is too exciting.

Then... Then, a squit.

- "Squit"? - Yeah, squit.

They fall in love,

if you can call it that.

I don't believe this.

Do you know what? I... I don't believe this.

First, you insult my book, then you insult me.

Now I'm expected to go on television

and... and say that this morass of filth

is something that I wrote.

Do you know what? No, I've had enough.

- Yeah, yeah. - Yup! Yup!

- Okay. - Yes, okay!

God! Has anyone got any phone signal?

Listen to me, both of you.

This book is a hit.

So please, work together,

and help me sell it, so we can all make some money.

She has ruined my book,

and I plan on telling every single person I meet.

And then what?

You would be known as the idiot

who didn't even read his own book.

Worst, the man who said,

"Oh, yes, my book is a success.

"But I would like it more if it was a flop."

A boring flop that nobody wants to read.

Okay, María. You spiced it up.

And now you think you wrote 50 Shades of Grey?

But that book says on the cover

"Henry Cooper," not "María Rodríguez."

Copper.

María, you want to tell everybody?

Okay, fine. We'll have a scandal,

and the book dies a quick death.

So please, smile.

Tell people what they want to hear. And get into the car.

Argh.

Does this car have air conditioning?

No. It's a Volkswagen Beetle, not the Ritz hotel.

Most cars have air conditioning. It's not rare.

That's broken. Also...

It is the radio!

We're here!

Are we?

Oh, for Pete's sake.

You should see the one we rejected.

Oh my God!

Oh my God!

It's you! Henry Copper!

I love your book!

- Er, sorry? - Um...

"Oh, my God. It's you, Henry Copper.

"I love your book."

Oh, my goodness. Thank you. Um...

Sorry. This is my...

Er... Er...

- María. Yeah. - My translator.

- Hola. - Hi.

I'm Beatriz.

- Welcome to my show. - Thank you.

El Corazón Sensible

is my Beatriz Book Club Book of the Year.

- Oh, wow. - I am so pleased to meet you.

Yeah, nice to meet you, too.

Don't forget to give me your autograph after the show.

You're so handsome!

Maybe you can give her

your phone number, too.

Oh, God.

My next guest is the author

of the literary sensation of the year,

The Sensible Heart.

I love this book! It makes me tingle inside!

Henry, bienvenido.

Welcome.

Thank you. Thank you for having me, Beatriz.

And his translator, María Rodeo.

Uh, Rodríguez.

Henry. You studied English literature

- and the classics. - Yeah.

So, people might expect your book

to be boring, but it's not.

It actually reads like a telenovela,

like a really sexy soap opera.

Y... Yes.

Yeah. Well, er...

I... I... I'm open to many influences.

Er, not every story about love has to be about sex.

You know, someone once wrote,

"Chastity is the body in the soul's keeping."

Okay, but please tell us,

what's your favorite telenovela?

The one with... with the twins...

and... and the president

and the stray dog.

Of course. The Usurper!

What a classic!

Ha.

Yeah. Erm, but this novel, my work, erm,

it's nothing like a telenovela.

It's very, very different. The way I approached...

What's wrong with telenovelas?

I mean, telenovelas contain drama,

excitement, emotion, story.

María, since you really like talking,

I have a question for you.

Was it hard, as a mere translator,

to convey the meaning

of Señor Copper's amazing words?

Thank you. Thank you.

No.

I just changed everything.

I'm sorry, what?

Yes, I mean...

...I changed everything from English to Spanish...

...making sure to keep

the brilliant, amazing words of Mr. Copper.

You must feel very lucky?

You have no idea.

Yes. Yes.

Yeah, we, er...

We work very well together.

Uh-huh.

Always ask for a hardback.

More money for the author... and me.

Oh, Henry, please...

- Hola. - Hola.

Your book has filled my heart with love

and my body with desire.

Next! Shoo, shoo.

I thought you'd be more attractive in person.

You!

Mr. Copper, I never understood men before I read this book.

Now my bed is never empty!

"Señor Copper,

"your breath smells like a monkey's ass."

Sí.

Gracias.

My partner and I dress

as your characters for...

...our intimate moments.

He and her partner

dress as your characters, and they like to...

Oh, come on.

Give me your autograph.

Okay.

Here, here. Look!

Oh, God. This is happening.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

No, no. Stop, stop.

- Hola. - Hola.

For Miguelito.

Miguelito's having an orgasm.

Gracias.

Good luck.

- Jen... - Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Put some clothes on, please.

Oh.

What are you doing up this late?

It's 9:00 p.m.,

which I realize isn't that late.

It's 3:00 where you are, though. Why?

Henry, I'm just checking in.

I'm hearing attendance is through the roof.

So is my blood pressure.

Jen, did you know my so-called translator

has changed every single word?

I think we've got a bad connection.

- Every single word? - I'm not getting any of that.

Jen?

Listen, because of the following

you've been building over there,

The Sensible Heart

is getting re-released in the UK.

That's... That's...

- That's great news! - Yeah.

- Right? That's... - Yeah.

- That's good. - It is great news.

What we're going to do, Henry,

we're going to take the Mexican version,

which is so popular,

and we're going to have it translated back into English.

Everyone's gonna love it.

We've got a new jacket and everything.

Show me.

- Huh? - Jen...

- Oh, the jacket, yeah... - Jen, show me.

Hello.

Jen...

God.

Jen.

What?

Is it the nipple, Henry? We can lose the nipple.

- There's only one. - What's the point?

You may as well just include a free poster

of a couple having sex on the back of a horse.

That's funny.

Now, you're thinking, Henry.

Don't actually do... Oh.

Okay, sweet dreams. Talk soon.

Yeah, thanks.

- Bye. - Thanks, Jen. Thanks.

I need a drink.

Hmm.

Killing someone else's darlings?

I don't even know what that means.

- More translation? - I'm writing.

Mm, I can see that. What are you writing?

Characters that is for a novel.

You should try it.

Well, I'm sorry to be intruding.

I can go if you like.

No, please. Just, be my guest.

Only because I can't get back to sleep.

So, tell me...

What's it about, the novel?

Everyone seems to like your ideas better than mine.

Oh, no, no.

I don't have time to write it, anyway, so...

So, what do you drink?

Er, what are you drinking, beer?

How do you even ask for a beer?

Is it, "Uno beero, por favor"?

Antonio?

What the hell?

What's up, María?

What are you doing here?

What am I doing here? What are YOU doing here?

You said you were in San Miguel.

Ah, yes. I did go.

We had the recording session,

and I did really well!

I'm sorry, I know I should have told you.

But that's how these things are...

...they invited me on a tour so here I am.

Where is Diego?

Where do you think? Sleeping.

Let's see. You left my son alone?

You really are unbelievable.

Everything all right?

Who... Who was that?

Oh, um, nobody.

He's... He's a nobody.

Sorry.

Where are we going?

Palenque.

Our last stop before we all go home.

It's an old Mayan city.

Is it far?

Only, like, 10 hours.

Ten?

Henry.

It's so cold. Why is it so cold?

Because it's Mexico, it has to be hot?

Well, yes.

Unbelievable.

I never met anyone who was racist

about the weather before.

I mean, do you hear me say,

"It's always raining in England"?

But it is always raining in England.

Here!

Oh, gracias.

Erm...

What sort of blanket is this?

It belonged to my Alicia.

Was... Was... Was that your wife?

No, my dog.

I miss her.

She died in... in that blanket.

Ay, no!

Hold this.

Okay. Wow.

It's a tire.

Yes, sorry, this just really isn't my area.

Anyone can see that.

Is it that obvious?

Yeah.

You've had an easy life.

Well, that's not true.

Isn't it?

Okay, let me tell you the life you've lived.

A beautiful house with garden.

Private school, university, and now you're a writer.

And you're not rich, but you have an easy life.

And maybe, sometimes,

you get a sore finger from typing too much.

I'm sure the life of a translator must be awful.

Is that what you think I am?

A translator?

I work in a bar. And when I don't work in a bar,

I work in a kitchen.

And when I don't do that, I go to sleep.

And if I'm lucky, sometimes, I make notes for a novel

that I'll never have time to write.

So, like I said,

you have an easy life.

You know,

I could tell from reading your book

that you don't know anything about life.

You have no experience.

Yes, I do.

- Of course, I do. Yes, I do. - No, you don't.

And you've never been in love.

How do you know that?

I told you, I read your book.

This pure love you talk about doesn't exist.

Aah!

You okay?

Do you want me to...?

You know, the only reason you're even here

is because of the words I wrote about love.

Do you know how that feels?

Do you want to know what love is?

Love is being lied to.

Love leaves you stranded...

...alone, and penniless...

...with a grandfather and a child

who won't let you even breathe...

Ay, Diego...

Diego, listen to me...

No, no I didn't mean it!

Diego, Diego, Diego...

Erm...

Let me try.

Mm.

- Hola. - Hola.

Er...

Hi, can I sit?

Yup.

Okay.

Okay.

Er...

Whew.

The only, er...

The only thing I remember about being a child

is just how bloody awful it is.

Yeah, everyone telling you what to do.

I mean, literally everyone.

Your parents...

Teachers...

Even the lollipop men.

Do you have lollipop men here?

I don't speak English.

Right. Yeah.

Don't speak...

Ooh, here we go.

One moment.

I don't suppose

there's a child-parent section here,

but let's have a go.

Er...

Okay.

Er...

I wish... to buy...

some hens.

No, I know.

Your mother...

is...

ill.

No. No, no...

Your mother... is... angry.

But...

I love you.

I love you.

She... loves you.

She... loves you.

Erm, the woman...

is crazy...

...but she loves you...

because, er...

...you are...

her husband.

Her man.

She is angry, erm...

with me because...

I am...

a spoon.

Please...

show me...

your towels.

Er...

I have broken my bottom.

Erm...

You understand?

Mm.

It's okay.

Er...

Smile!

Very good, Pedro, very good.

Mama, you didn't say he was funny!

Where were you?

Ay.

Can you forgive me, son?

Mm. Mm-hmm.

I'm sorry my love.

Can I have a hug?

I must say, they're saying

some nice things about the book.

Oh, thank you.

What is this?

Is this for us?

Hey! Wait, wait, wait!

Oh, my God!

This is crazy.

Wow.

Gracias.

Good evening, everybody, and welcome

to a very special event, live on TV

across this beautiful nation. And tonight,

I am very proud to present the author of an amazing book,

El Corazón Sensible.

Henry Copper. Welcome!

Gracias.

And with him, his translator...

María Rodríguez!

Yes, María!

María Rodríguez, that's right.

That's me.

You already have fans.

Do you have the TV remote? Turn it up!

One of the main themes

of this wonderful book of yours

is the relationship between two people

that really care and love each other.

Whether it's a man and a woman...

Yes.

Or a woman and a woman...

Page 92!

Yes, er...

Indeed.

Even though the book is quite, er, lively,

what it's really about, for me, is love.

Love is,

well, love is at the heart of everything, isn't it?

It's the one thing that we're, all of us, searching for.

For me, love is patience, more than passion.

But, Henry, your book

is completely full of passion, isn't it?

Mm-hmm.

Well, at least, passion about sex, anyway.

Mm-hmm.

Yes, it is.

That it is.

Er, but I think there was something

that was slightly lost in the translation.

Erm...

Well, you know, maybe love itself is not good.

'Cause love is a dream, right? It's a... It's a mirage.

Love will always let us down.

People let us down.

People are flawed.

Er...

Love is an ideal.

And ideals, unlike people, are not real.

Well... Sorry.

- We agree to disagree. - Yeah.

Who is this guy?

I am going to name my child after you.

Er, you don't need to do that.

- Yes! - No.

Henry Copper Valdez.

- That's good, hmm? - Órale.

Er, but... But what if it's a girl?

You could call her María.

- There you go. - Nah.

Erm...

Henrietta Copper Valdez.

Henrietta.

Henry, we wrote our own fan fiction

based on your book.

Wow, guys.

- You like it? - Oh, wow.

It's fantastic.

Just a quick... Who is this?

It's Thomas.

Thomas the chauffeur!

The love machine.

Yes, he is.

Thomas, with the big heart,

who makes love to everyone in the book.

- To everyone? - Everyone.

Everyone.

To everyone. There we go.

Henry Copper...

Henry Copper...

Who are you?

I know you're there.

I can hear your English breathing.

English people don't breathe

any differently to other people.

Of course they do.

It's all that roast beef.

"Roast beef"?

Roast beef, yeah.

Are you following me,

with that bottle of tequila?

Mm-hmm.

Are you flirting with me?

No, er...

Since it's my last night in Mexico,

I just thought you might wanna share it.

It's a big bottle. Er, I don't know,

someone gave it to me at the fan event.

Mm. Let's drink!

- Yeah, okay. - Yeah.

Mmm.

I like it here.

- Yes, right? - Yeah.

- It's so cool. - Ah, it's hot.

You English.

Always so...

What was that?

What was that? Was that a tiger?

A tiger?

Or a lion? I... I don't know.

Oh, yeah, yeah, the famous Mexican lion.

Okay, what was it? What was that?

- It's the monkeys. - The monkeys?

That was... That was a monkey?

- That was a monkey. - Sounded like a dragon.

What?

- You were scared. - I was scared.

Just for a minute.

And you don't mind saying that?

Why would I?

No, it's just that a lot of men would rather

be killed by a monkey than, you know,

admit they were scared.

- Salud. - Cheers to that.

Oh, wow.

Who was that man?

- Mm... - From the other night.

Mexico City, in the bar.

Uh...

Diego's father, isn't it?

Uh-huh. Yeah, he is.

He looks like the kind of man who isn't afraid of anything.

- Antonio? - Mm.

He's scared of nothing...

except being with his own family.

Why do you mention him?

No reason.

It's funny.

I usually find it hard talking to women.

It's not hard.

You just have to say, "María,

"you're an amazing writer

"and an incredible person."

What do you mean, you can't talk to women?

Er... I don't know.

I went to a same-sex boarding school.

The only woman I've ever really known well

is my mother.

And she died when I was young, so...

Oh, I'm sorry.

And how about your father?

My father was distant.

Yeah. I mean, literally.

He was a missionary

in the Antarctic.

And then he was eaten by a seal.

What?

Or was it dang vicious penguins?

I'm kidding.

You are a strange man, Henry Copper.

Erm...

Back at our rooms.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, we better go in then.

Yeah, an early start tomorrow.

Hmm.

Thank you.

Thank you.

No, thank you.

No, seriously, it was... it was...

fun.

So...

Good night, Henry Copper.

Goodnight.

Are you ready to go home, Henry?

Yeah.

- Okay, let's go. - No, no, no.

Henry, give me your tablet.

- Give me your tablet. - What?

How you say, let's take one for the road.

On the count of three, say "Pedro!"

One, two, three...

Pedro.

Okay.

Well, that's it. Er, thank you.

- Okay. - Max, Pedro.

Let's go!

Bye, Diego.

The sky is...

cloudy.

- Cloudy. - Cloudy.

It look...

like rain.

Very good.

Okay.

- Goodbye, Henry. - Adiós.

Come on son, get in the car.

She hates goodbyes.

Expecting someone?

No.

For you and me.

But I'm working, Antonio.

María, the place is empty.

- Come on, sit with me! - Ok, fine.

So where's your British friend?

Ah! So you're watching me?

I'm not watching you, it's just social media!

Yes, you're watching me!

No! You open social media and photos start to show up...

Uh-huh.

Anyway. This is why I came.

For Diego and for you.

From the gig.

Thank you.

I'll take it off what you owe me.

It's not that much!

Mm-hmm.

Um...

You're wearing the shirt you had on

when I first met you.

And the truth is...

...you look just as beautiful and as sexy.

Hmm.

Thanks for reminding me I have no new clothes.

María, how are you?

Hey, María.

You know you can count on me, right?

- Mm-hmm. - You can trust me.

We're a family.

Have you ever...

Have you ever had a week where...

...where everything made sense?

As if...

...as if your life was just as you dreamt it?

And then suddenly...

...you come back to reality and...

...it's over.

Nevermind, forget it. Pretend I didn't say anything.

Hey, hey, hey...

I understand.

I understand perfectly.

We've all been through moments like these.

Come on!

Why don't we go somewhere else?

This place is a little depressing, isn't it?

We could go somewhere else and talk.

Talk?

Though not at my house

because my roommates are having another party...

...and you know how it gets.

Ok. Let's go to mine.

But just to talk.

Just to talk.

- Jen. - Henry!

Oh, I am so glad I caught you. Did you check in yet?

No, my flight's been delayed.

Good. Don't.

- What? - First off...

"Don't"?

The new edition is doing really well.

- And... - And that makes me happy.

I'm not finished.

We need a new novel.

We want a new Henry Copper book.

Oh...

What?

And we need it in ten weeks. Ahh!

- Ten weeks? Jen, I... - I know.

Jen, I can't write a novel in ten weeks.

I know it's a crazy deadline, Henry.

But we figured it was doable

if you did it with, um, your translator.

- M... María? - Yes.

What do you say?

- Erm... - Henry...

You would... You would make a lot of money from this.

But this is my creation.

- You know? It's my... - Oh, come on, Henry.

We both know that's not totally true.

Hmm?

From what I understand,

Ms. Rodríguez made quite a material contribution

to the new version.

Mostly sex, Jen.

Which was integral to the entire storyline

of the version that people actually liked, Henry.

It sounds to me like she breathed

some life into your book.

She did that, all right.

Look, you don't even have to be in the same room.

Wouldn't I?

Unless you wanna be in the same room, then sure.

What do you think, Henry? Come on.

I'll come back for breakfast.

OK.

I'll call you.

Sure.

No, no, Pedro, no!

I've helped you already, I'm done!

But María, you'd only do half the work!

Yes, and he would be getting all the credit.

Yes, but it's his name that will sell the book.

Credit doesn't pay your bills.

Just think about it, and then say yes.

You can use my house.

We both know that man can't do it without you.

Good morning, María Fernanda Rodríguez.

It's good to see you again.

- Wow. - Mm-hmm.

Very good.

Good morning, Mr. Copper.

I'm learning, all right?

- Mm. - I'm learning.

What have you done?

She's redecorated.

This is my house.

There are other rooms. This is the workspace.

You moved my Murano clown.

You two drink and smell the roses.

I have to go now

and take care of other men who need me.

Goodbye.

Goodbye!

To another fantastic beginning.

I see good things about to happen.

- Hey. - Hey!

How are you?

Are you writing without me?

No. No, no, no...

I'm not...

I was just working through some ideas.

I was just getting started.

Okay, we're gonna have one rule.

Okay.

You never write without me.

This is a collaboration, do you understand?

Like, we're... we're partners.

I... I... I understand.

A collaboration. I cannot...

I cannot do this without you.

So this will be a blend of both of us.

- I get it. - Cool.

So, tell me your ideas.

Erm...

Er, well, okay.

Er, I have a man who works in a library...

No.

There's an elderly vicar, er...

- No, very much, no. - Well...

And this woman finds her happiness

in caring for her sick mother.

You could have just said no.

Let me show you some magic.

- ...what you want. - But it is who we...

This is my book. My name is...

Do the book the way...

Earth calling Henry.

Sorry. I was just working through

some of your ideas from yesterday.

Oh.

- They're good. - Mm.

- When they stop in the road... - Yeah.

Surprise!

Right, how about this?

What if he is in love with her?

No.

- Bear with me. Bear with me. - Uh-uh-uh.

Pap-pap-pap...

No.

He is in love with her but he doesn't know it yet,

because he's never been in love before.

Hmm.

What about her?

Well, she's sure she isn't in love with him.

Yes.

But actually she is in love with him.

And they ride a bicycle? No.

- It works. It works. - No, no, no.

It's not love. It's desire.

What if she wants him and loves him?

You can have both.

It's just lust.

Okay, all right. Okay.

Okay, let's try it your way first,

and then we'll try it my way.

Eh., no.

I'm joking. Let's try it your way.

No.

- Yeah. - What? No.

- No! - Mm-hmm. Eeh-hee.

"They looked at each other. They were naked, magnificent.

"They made I..."

- No, I can't even say that. - What's wrong with it?

What's w...

"They made love like two dragons

"exploding in the flames of a volcano."

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

- This is the end. - Come on.

Yeah, this is the ending.

It's not an ending. That's not an ending.

Lost in passion and dragons exploding in a volcano.

We need a powerful ending.

We cannot end with milk and cookies

and goodnight, Teddy in the nursery.

I'm not asking for milk and cookies.

I'm not asking for Teddy in the nursery.

What is this?

Keep working!

You're nearly done.

No, we are done.

I can't go on with this unreasonable man.

I'm not the one who's unreasonable.

They split up, they get back together,

they make love. The end.

It's not as simple as that, Pedro.

Love never is.

- Oh, wow. - Where are you going?

To see my mother.

Carnival! I'm going to Carnival!

- It's Carnival! - Yes!

Uh-uh. No, no, come on. Let's crack on.

No, let's not "crack on," whatever that means.

- Yes. Please... - Let's get out.

- Let's... - No. No.

Sit down and...

Let's please just finish this chapter.

Okay.

I think that's worked.

You know what? I hate to say it,

but I think we've done enough.

Mm?

I think... I think we've done enough.

Okay. What time is it?

No!

It's too late! Come on, the Carnival.

Why didn't you say anything before?

- Because I'm not... - Let's go.

...overly fond about the idea.

Oh, come on. Let's go.

I think we're a little late.

I'd say.

Look, why don't we just go back?

No! Hell, no! We deserve a party!

What party? There's nobody here.

We are here.

Hey! Here you go!

- Thank you! - Happy Carnival!

He's here.

Don't drink that, though. You don't know where it's been.

No. But I know where it's going.

- Don't drink it. - Eh, eh, eh...

María?

- Oh, stop. Let's go. - María?

How are you, Antonio?

How are you?

You're the British?

- Er, yes, Henry. Hello. - Oh, Henry.

Like, Henry Style. Henry Potter?

Henry the Prince?

Er, I think you mean Harry.

Oh, whatever.

Okay.

Okay.

I get it now. I get it.

- Mm-hmm? - Everything you talked about

in the bar...

...is because you met this English man, right?

So what? You thought that your life was going

to suddenly become marvelous and fantastic?

María, you really think this guy

is going to make you a writer?

No, I don't think so,

because I already am a writer, Antonio. Yes, I am.

María, be realistic. He is a writer. You work in a bar.

That's it. That's reality, whether you like it or not.

I'm not saying it's fair...

...but life isn't fair and you know that very well.

I don't understand what the hell you want!

You do know. Stop playing,

you're not a teenager anymore, María.

Hey, where are you going? Wait! Wait for me.

It's your turn

to take care of Diego on Saturday. Show up!

No, no. If you want I can pick him up right now...

...so you can party!

Hey!

Henry!

What are they?

Oh, my gosh.

What?

Oh, gosh.

Oh, my God.

Well...

Well, it's been nice to get out of the house.

You're right.

Yeah. And I've actually, actually enjoyed myself.

No, you're... you're right about the book.

I didn't think we're talking about that.

We are.

Passion fades.

And...

these two characters...

deserve more.

Passion is a part of love.

Desire, all these things, you know,

they're all a part of love.

But...

But what about the mind?

What about the body

in the soul's keeping?

- In the soul's "kipping." - "Kipping."

Er... Forget about that. I...

I didn't even know what I was saying.

I can't find the words.

You don't need words.

Mm!

Hey, wait, wait, wait. What about Pedro?

- He's not gonna come. - How do you know?

Well, you don't dress up like that

and come back home for cocoa. Right?

Mm?

Method writing.

Morning.

Good morning.

Hmm.

Two dragons exploding

in the flames of a volcano.

- Hm? - Mm-hmm.

Argh. I have to go and get Diego ready for the day.

Okay?

See you later.

Good morning.

Did you sleep well?

Writing on your own?

- She won't like that. - I know.

I know. I'm just, er... I just got a bit carried away.

When she sees what I've done with her ideas, I think...

Ah, you better discuss it.

I know. I know. I'm just...

Mm...

Or it won't end well.

Hello!

I'm late. I know.

I'm sorry.

Let's start.

What's this?

What's this?

That son of a bitch!

You told me it was over between you two.

You told me he was nobody in your life.

He is nobody.

And yet you believe him before you believe me?

So you don't trust me.

And... And I can't trust you.

- Wait... Stop... Just... - Leave me alone.

- Leave me alone. - Just give me a minute, okay?

Okay.

Okay.

Look, um...

My entire life, all I ever wanted to do is write,

you know?

And instead of that, what do I do?

I take care of men.

I clean and I work in a bar for men.

And then one day,

Pedro asks me if I wanna translate your book.

And you know why I said yes?

No.

I knew I could make it better.

And I did. I... I made it better.

And then I started

to feel good about myself

for once in my life.

And then we work together

and I began to feel really good about myself.

And even though my name would never be on the cover,

I still felt like a writer.

I thought we were a team.

We are.

I'm so stupid.

I am.

'Cause I trusted you

but you don't trust me.

I do trust you. Er...

Look, we are a team.

I shouldn't have said anything about the photo, all right?

It's not about the photo, Henry.

You finished the book without me.

It's the one thing you promised you wouldn't do.

María...

Goodbye, Henry. Go home.

Happy publication day.

- Thank you. - I could've put them

in the post, but I wanted you to see 'em first.

Pants, Henry.

- Sorry? - Pants.

Yes, right. Good point.

Oh.

I got your plane ticket as requested.

Thank you.

It's on me.

We booked late, so it's a middle seat,

at the back.

Next to the lavatories.

Good luck.

That's... Thank you. Er...

Bye.

Erm...

Mama! Come with me! Quickly!

What are you doing here, son?

No, you have to see this!

Hurry!

Wait! Wait, Diego!

Hey! What?

That's your name.

- Wow. - He put your name on it!

Yes.

- You wrote it, right? - Yes.

Then you should be there!

It's today!

Let's go!

Here is your speech.

I didn't write a speech.

I know! I did.

- It's in Spanish, Pedro. - Sí.

How do you say it in English?

Duh!

It's very easy. Just read it.

Ladies and gentlemen.

Please welcome, Mr. Henry Copper!

Make it count. Make it count.

- Bravo! - Bravo, Henry!

Er, thank you very much.

Thank you for your warm reception.

Er, I don't deserve it...

...even though I am pretty sexy...

Yes, he is!

...for an Englishman.

I mean it...

...you should see some of us.

Generally, we are awful.

- Yeah, sometimes they stink. - Oh.

Thank you.

- Okay. - Okay.

First of all, Henry,

I want to say what a great book Two Hearts is.

Oh, thank you.

It is, if I may say,

even more powerful than The Sensible Heart.

You might even say a big leap forward.

Yes, I mean, I agree.

It is, er... It is a better book, yes.

I am confused, though.

Two Hearts is credited to yourself

and to María Rodríguez.

That's correct, yes.

So, she helped you write it?

Well, much more than that, really. Erm...

Can you be more specific?

Well...

María Rodríguez...

She is the... the second heart.

Aw.

Erm...

If not for her, nobody here would be reading this book.

In fact, I would say...

It might exist without me,

but it wouldn't exist without her.

And this is the same María Rodríguez

who translated The Sensible Heart?

Yes, well...

only, she didn't translate it.

Erm...

She rewrote it.

I knew it. I knew it!

I suppose what I'm saying is...

I wrote it, yes. Erm, but she rewrote it.

And then she rewrote me.

She absolutely did.

She, er...

You...

completely rewrote me.

Aw...

I'm sorry. I'm having difficulty with this...

understanding this phrase.

Sorry. Erm...

Well, perhaps there's a translator in the house.

Erm...

I said...

Er...

Is there a translator...

I heard you the first time.

It's her!

María!

Hello.

Erm...

I was wrong.

I was... I mean, I was completely wrong.

And you were right.

You're an amazing woman.

Er, a much better writer.

And I'm an idiot.

I'm an idiot.

I'm an idiot who loves you.

Eh? What did he say?

He said he's an idiot.

Yes!

He's an idiot.

Antonio!

What are you doing here?

Here you are.

The Englishman who comes here

and helps a Mexican housewife become a star.

It's a lovely story.

According to them,

it's a lovely story, but...

It's not the whole story, right?

Sorry? Who are you?

Ah.

Sorry.

I'm her husband, she's my wife!

It's the husband!

Through common law. It's not the same thing!

This is better than a telenovela!

And him?

Who is he? Have you asked yourselves?

Eh?

That Englishman has come here and stolen my woman.

Shame!

Are we in the stone age or what?

María, what happened?

I thought I could have you back...

...and my son...

...and the love of my family.

And then, I open this shit and I read page 125.

"They made...

...love like two dragons...

...exploding in the flames of a volcano."

Hey, spoilers!

No, no it's not a spoiler.

It's the trash that Henry Copper wrote

about my woman.

This is your trash, man.

Hey, that is not trash! I wrote it.

And it may be a little over the top, sure,

but it's still very sexy.

Yes, yes, very sexy

Sexy? This nerd? No, no...

You English, button-topped cabbage.

What do you know about sexy?

Believe me, Antonio...

...Henry knows a lot about sexy.

Ooh!

You think because you play the trumpet,

and lounge about all day...

...and never button up your shirt, that you're a man?

Is that what being a man is?

Staying out, never being home, and never being there?

No, no, no, no...

That's not true, María.

I've always been there for you.

A few days ago when you were sad.

Where did you cry, huh? Here! On my shoulder!

Hey, I... I think that's enough.

No, no, no.

I'm gonna tell you when it's enough...

'cause I'm gonna kill you.

No!

I think we can talk about this.

Stop him!

- Henry! - Oh, thank you.

I'm so sorry.

I'm going to kill you!

Let me go!

Yeah, get out!

Always go for the hardback!

Tie him up

and throw him straight into the trash!

Hey!

- Are you okay? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Erm...

I'm sorry.

- Are you okay? - Yes.

Yeah.

- Phew! - Yes, I am.

Oh, gosh.

- Hola. - Hola.

Erm...

Now, I need you to translate something for me.

- Oh, gosh. - Mm-hmm.

All right, I'll try.

Whoa.

Well, that... that's easy.

Yeah?

I love you.

I think my water just broke.

Her water broke!

It's coming!

Please welcome

the international best-selling debut novelist

and my personal choice

for Beatriz Book Club Book of the Year,

our very own, María Rodríguez.

Whoa! Te amo!

María, what a pleasure!

So, what a great book! Very impressive!