Original subtitles

Come on, McBrown, admit it. My candidate is the only one with a legitimate plan

to help this country. Look, pal, I understand how you feel, but I have to

off now. Why won't you tell the people the truth? You know, with your support,

we could turn this election around.

Will you give it a rest?

Jerry Brown is out of the race.

More lies. It's not too late. 1 -800 -426... I'm telling you, I've had it

this whole campaign process.

I think we should take all the candidates, put them in a locked room,

dart, and whoever hits is president.

Wait, chief.

And best of all, it's sport.

Well, in only 14 more hours, it'll all be over. No more wild accusations,

personal attacks, ugly name -calling.

This wasn't a campaign. It was a date with Deborah from accounting.

Happy Election Day, everyone!

Don't forget to vote!

Don't forget to vote!

Good morning, you two.

Aren't you excited?

I could hardly sleep at all last night. I kept waking up every half hour looking

at the clock to see if it was here yet.

I'm the same way on election eve, Corky. In fact, last night I snuck down in the

middle of the night to see if Bush or Clinton had eaten the plate of cookies I

left for them.

I left a letter.

Dear presidential candidates, I have been a very good boy.

I would like a balanced budget, better health care, and G .I. Joe with kung fu

grip.

Frank!

You've got a coffee ring on my voting booklet.

Right on the proposed sewer bond issue.

Of course. You don't actually read all that stuff, do you? Of course I read all

that stuff, Frank. It's important.

Don't you?

Well, I look at it, but I don't have a lot of time unless it involves the

important stuff. You know, president, more cable channels. I can't be

And you call yourself a responsible citizen.

You're what's wrong with this country, Frank. You know, I am really tired of

hearing that.

Most people don't understand what this stuff is about. Anyway, look, I'll show

you. Murph, tell me what you know about Initiative 7.

Initiative 7?

Oh, yes. I believe it starred Yul Brynner. No, wait. That was Magnificent

sorry. What was the question?

Morning, all.

Jim, do you read all those little initiatives and bond issues on the

None of your business, Frank.

I'm sorry, but how I vote is my own concern. No one knows how I vote.

Really, Jim? Not even Doris? Absolutely not. And I have no idea how she votes.

After 30 years of marriage, there are only two things about my wife I feel

never know. The first is how she votes.

The second is why she calls the shower massage Steve.

Good morning, people, and how is the best election coverage team in the

business? Ready to enlighten? Ready to educate? Ready to kick Jennings and

Brokaw's butts?

Nice clipboard, Miles. Sign me up for intramural volleyball.

Oh, isn't she just so very amusing?

You think Andrea Mitchell is making volleyball jokes right now? Well, I can

assure you she is not.

She's lean, she's mean, and she eats news teams like us for breakfast.

You give her half a chance and she will rip off Jim's head, empty it out, and

use it as a purse. Is that what you want? I'm kidding.

Jeez,

Miles, how much coffee have you had this morning? Never mind.

Now, Murphy, you're spending the day covering Senator Bricker. Will you be

in time for your interview with James Baker? No problem. Bricker's a

up for re -election. What could his day entail? Breakfast?

Lie, lie.

Lunch? Lie, lie. Early supper? Lie, lie. And I'm home by four.

Well, I know one little citizen who got up on the cynical side of the bed this

morning. Corky, when you've been through as many presidential elections as we

have, it's hard to muster the old enthusiasm.

Well, I'm sorry, Jim, but I don't think we should forget how important this day

really is.

Which reminds me.

Miles, if it's okay, I'll be using my lunch hour to go vote.

Is that pretty much when everyone else was planning it? How could you all be so

wishy -washy about this?

Voting is a very special privilege.

I'll never forget my very first presidential election.

It was November 6th, 1984.

Reagan and Mondale.

don't tell me that you're mad are you bobear corky i gotta be back at the

dealership by one we've got to clear out all the 1984 models make room for the

85s november scat like month i know and i apologize bobear but i got held up at

the ad agency they wanted my opinion on which life size cut out of me they

should use for the display in the first bank of new orleans and i couldn't

decide between the one of me proudly displaying the new personalized checks

this

I look surprised at the leatherette checkbook cover that comes free with

new account.

I'm sure you'll look for his picture in both of them. Now let's get this over

with and get something to eat. Now I gotta get back to work.

November's Cadillac month.

I'm just so excited about voting.

Look!

I even filled out my sample ballot in advance.

Did you read this whole ballot and try to figure it out all by yourself?

That is so cute.

Honey, this is...

Written in confusing legal gibberish by lawyers from New York. It's way too

complicated for you.

Oh, no, it's not, Beau, honey. I understood.

No, see, look here. Right off the bat, you checked the wrong box for the

president.

Well, that's who I thought I'd vote for.

Oh, Corky, you can't be serious. The man's running with a woman for vice

president.

Oh,

sweetheart, we can't have a female a heartbeat away from the presidency. It's

too unpredictable, and you know how you get her every 28 days.

Beau, please.

Look at your voice.

I'm the first bank of New Orleans lady.

Besides, what does being a woman have to do with anything?

I've thought a lot about this, and I think I've made the right choice. Corky,

honey, you can't even choose between cardboard cutout pictures of yourself.

you want to make your life a lot easier, you put this back in your purse.

Now, here.

Take my sample ballot. It's already marked.

You just go on in there and vote. One, two, three, we'll be sitting down to

lunch. Now, here you go, sweetheart.

Take it.

lucky to have you look out for me.

Why don't you just go sit over there? I won't be one minute.

Hello, I'm Corky Lynn Sherwood and I'll be voting for the very first time. Well,

good for you.

You sign right here and you can go into that middle booth.

You forgot your sample ballot.

Oh, thank you, but I won't be needing it.

versus Richard Milhouse Nixon.

A day that could quite possibly alter the very fabric of our country.

That's how I'd like to start, Al. Does that seem all right to you?

You're right, you're right. Coming out of the booth is too theatrical. Maybe I

should just stand here, right?

No, that's too boring.

Maybe I should sit.

Oh, that's brilliant.

I don't want to take out my comb and do my impression of Ed Cookie Burns.

Holy moly. My first election story and I'm still looking for an angle.

Jerry! Big news. Just got off the phone with the station.

We're going national.

Al, crank her up.

I'm sorry, Dave. Who's going national? We are. The station just heard that

got Chancellor and Van Oker doing regional coverage, so they want the same

thing, and they want it now.

Dave, are you saying... Yeah.

You, Chicago, and this VFW Hall are our Midwest representatives.

Jimmy Dyle, tonight you're going to be introduced to the world by Walter

Cronkite. Cronkite?

Al, we only got time for one shot, so give me your best.

Dave, are you sure you have the right person for this?

I'm not an anchor. I'm a local field reporter. Last night I covered a beef

tongue carnival. I interviewed the Queen.

I'm not ready for a crook.

Jimmy, I don't have time for this.

Opportunity's knocking.

Answer it. You got a shot at moving up the broadcast ladder until, well, who

knows? Maybe you'll hit the bullseye. National anchor.

Or you can kiss it off and spend the rest of your career at Channel 9 as Poop

Deck Pete in their cartoons ahoy.

So what's it going to be?

Okay, I'll do it.

Let's go, Al.

Election day.

Presidential election day.

Election day.

Rolling.

Election day, 1960.

New decade.

New president, a new opportunity.

Standing here in this VFW hall, this reporter can't help but notice a feeling

among these voters.

A feeling that is somehow bigger than this presidential election.

That feeling is hope.

Hope for the future.

Hope for the opportunity that lies ahead.

It's crazy in here. Yeah.

It's that rare day in Washington where Democrats and Republicans are forced to

get along with each other.

Nobody knows who's out, who's in.

I'm telling you, there's so much sucking up going on in here, it sounds like an

Electrolux showroom.

You can't lie to me, Frank.

And thanks again, Phil, for the free apple pie.

She gets free apple pie?

Well, how come?

It's free to anyone with a stamp voting card.

Do you have one, Frank? Well, not yet, but I didn't know there was pie

Oh, sure.

Now you'll do your patriotic duty.

Well, I doubt very seriously if General George Washington crossed the icy waters

of the Delaware because there was free pie on the other side.

Well, you don't know. You weren't there.

Well, you just go, folks.

Jim, Miles, over here.

I just seemed to pick up my lunch. I got held up at the polls. I can't stay. You

know, sometimes one forgets that it's quite a thrilling feeling to cast your

vote and...

Realize you've done your part and then you get free pie.

Phil, I better vote soon or I'm going to run out of pie.

Don't forget to vote.

Hey, Miles, look at this girl.

Wow, that's great, isn't it?

She really cares about this election.

Here you go.

And you, don't forget to vote. Every vote counts.

Tell you, Miles.

I can't remember the last time I cared that much about something.

Don't forget your vote. Every vote counts.

You can't wear that McGovern button in here. It's against the law.

Excuse me.

What? I'm sorry, are you talking to me? Yeah. No campaign paraphernalia is

allowed within the perimeter of the polling place.

It might influence other voters.

Oh, please.

I've been wearing it around for months. It hasn't influenced anyone.

Have you seen the latest polls?

It's going to be a Nixon -Agnew landslide.

It's my first chance to vote. There's no point in even going in there and

pulling the lever.

Yeah, as long as you feel that way, this country will always be run by corrupt

middle -aged establishment demagogues.

Political science major, right?

NYU?

I'm a reporter. I know the things about people.

Reporter? Hey, far out.

Good channel.

Please, do I look like someone who would ever sell out and go on television?

I'm a serious journalist.

I'm Amy.

Amy Madrid Marcinski.

Huh.

That's a wild name.

What's the significance of Madrid?

I added it.

It's a city that means a great deal to me.

It's where I lost my virginity.

Really?

I'm Frank Ford Pinto Fontana.

You're funny.

Only when I'm depressed. You should see me when I visit my parents. I'm a riot.

Here. Here's your button.

He promised to stop the war.

How could people not vote for him?

All those months of working for something I believe in, and look at how

out. I tell you, it just doesn't seem right. I feel like... Oh, I'm sorry. I'm

not usually this emotional. No, no, don't apologize.

It's rare to see a man in touch with his feelings.

I find it very beautiful.

I gave and I gave.

Got nothing back.

Like I've been let down by the whole world.

Would you, um... Would you like to go for a walk out in Washington Square

I got a bottle of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill wine in my knapsack.

I would love to, Frank Ford Pinto.

Let me just sign off duty.

Great.

I'll, uh, I'll wait outside.

Wait, wait, aren't you gonna vote?

Vote? Oh, yeah.

Right.

You wait right here.

You'll still be here when I get out, won't you?

Excuse me. I'm going to need more time.

Do you know if it's all right if I cancel what I did so far and come back

little while?

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Do you know if I were to leave the booth, would my vote be canceled?

I'm sorry to hold up the line. I'm having a little difficulty choosing

Reagan and Carter.

Good for you.

This is the first big decision I made without my parents.

Well, I mean, I did pick out these glasses.

You're probably thinking, freshman at Harvard, I should be able to make up my

mind, right?

You're right.

Be out in a minute.

Is there an actual time limit on this?

The thing is, I was raised by Democrats, so I am trained to vote for Carter.

But the thing is, I just have this really good feeling about Reagan.

He says this country's in a malaise.

I agree.

I feel it, too. At first, I thought I had mono, but now I know it's in

I think Reagan is just what this country needs.

He really knows what he's talking about.

It'll trickle down economics, Star Wars. These are good programs.

And, you know, he chops his own wood.

Gotta love that.

Okay.

That's it. I've made up my mind.

Ladies and gentlemen, the polls are now closed.

You're two hours behind schedule. Don't start with me, Miles. I spent election

day with a politician.

I've inhaled so much hot air I could float over the Redskins game this Sunday

with Goodyear on my butt.

Okay, okay, forget it. Baker's already in the studio and they're waiting for

in makeup. You're going to have to stall him, Miles. I have to get home and vote

before the polls close. Are you crazy?

I can't stall him. He's going straight from here to ABC.

How do I fill up the time this late? I'll be lucky to get Chelsea Clinton's

orthodontist.

He's right. You don't have time to do both.

So you don't vote this time. You can only do so much.

I was going to vote this morning, but then the baby was cranky, and the rest

the day got so crazy. Well, you guys know how it is. You didn't get a chance

vote either, right?

Well, actually, we did.

Oh.

Well, it's just one vote in a lifetime of voting.

All the way back to 1968, the first time I went to vote for president.

Wait a minute.

I wasn't old enough to vote in 68, and we're the same age.

Frank, I said I went to vote. I didn't say I was old enough.

to the Lexington Avenue retirement home.

All I need is your name.

That's right. My name is Sophie Abrams.

Sophie Abrams.

625 East 96th Street?

Yep. Right here on the every side.

So, what booth should I use?

Well, Sophie, I must say, you look better than you did at your 85th

party.

Uh, did I say Sophie? I meant... Zoya. Zoya. I'm Zoya...

of 650 East 79th Street, apartment 16. That's my name.

Zoya's older than Sophie.

What's going on, dear?

Okay.

I'm not Zoya or Sophie.

My name isn't even in this registration book. My government doesn't think I'm

old enough to vote. Well, if I'm old enough to pay taxes, I'm old enough to

on who's deciding my future. Hold your voice down there.

People are looking.

Fine. I want them to look.

That's the point. Look.

Look, everyone.

Look at injustice.

I, Murphy Brown, am being denied the right to vote by this fascist agent of

imperial United States government.

I'm just a volunteer, dear.

Just one of the millions of volunteers across the country denying my brothers

and sisters the right to decide their own future. We cannot vote, but we can

fight and die in an unjust and corrupt war.

I turn a deaf ear and a blind eye.

And if that applies to anyone here, I didn't mean it literally. But this

injustice cannot be ignored.

I, Murphy Brown, United States citizen, demand the right to vote in this

election. And I am not leaving until I do.

Okay. Call the police.

Let them bring their hoses and their mace.

Arrest me.

Come on, send me to jail.

Oh, don't talk like that, sweetheart. You're too pretty to go to jail.

I am not pretty. I'm a radical.

I just don't understand these young girls today.

How do they ever expect to get a nice boy to marry them?

Why are you all just staring at me? I have handcuffed myself to government

property. That's against the law.

Now, will you go and get the pigs?

Oh, I can't do that, darling. I keep cautious.

Please, will you get it together in here?

Darling, if you keep yelling like that, you're going to get unflattering lines

around your mouth.

Wake up. It's 1968.

I am talking to you about changing the country, and you're talking to me about

wrinkles. Darling, when you're my age, those little wrinkles will be a lot more

important to you than voting in any election.

I'll never get like you.

I'll never be a Sophie or a Zoya.

I'll never be a no -show in some registration book somewhere.

Now. For the last time, will you call the cops?

Dear, we don't want to bother them.

We're not that busy.

We don't need the vote.

You happen to know of an overflow voting crowd at PS 132.

But I'm warning you, the world has not heard the last of Murphy Brown.

Make time.

Oh, thank you. Thank you very much. You are much too kind.

For my next selection, Mozart's Symphony in G minor.

Ellen!

Ellen! What are you doing home?

Is the election over?

Who won?

Was it the old guy, the chubby guy?

Don't tell me it was a little guy with the ears.

It's not over yet.

Frank's doing my interview with James Baker, so I'd have time to go vote.

I want him to take the baby with me. It's his first presidential election,

wouldn't want him to miss it.

Well,

hello there, little Woodward Bernstein Brown.

You've been practicing that drool thing again. Very good.

Geez, did he have this much hair when I left this morning?

He's putting his legs in the arm holes.

Oh, thanks.

Uh, Eldon, I need a favor.

Huh?

I'm cutting this really close, and it would be a big, big help if you could

with us while I vote, and then drop me off at work.

Oh.

You know, I don't usually drive and drop.

However, if it is that important to you that you would actually allow me to

navigate your precious metal and chrome god, how can I see no?

Thanks.

Okay. Here we go. I know this is a little unexpected, but just roll with

Ready to go make history?

Okay, let's go.

Okay, now pay attention.

This is democracy in action.

First, you take the little marker. Okay, you do it with me.

And you move it to the name. That's right. Good, good.

Live with the Bindle Beeps.

Guinness, what's this we hear about a skindle this season?

Good stuff.

He let the cat out of the bag.

Fatherhood 2 is starting this Tuesday night at 9 .30. Only on Nick at Night.