Original subtitles

>> PREVIOUSLY, ON AWKWARD...

>> I GOT THE HEISMAN FROM JENNA.

DO YOU KNOW WHO SHE'S GOING

WITH?

>> WHY HAVEN'T YOU TOLD HIM?

>> I TRIED TO, BUT HE--

>> TAKE CARE.

I'M NOT GOING TO FORMAL.

I DON'T HAVE A DATE, AND MY

NOMINATION WAS A JOKE.

>> AS FAR AS WINTER FORMAL'S

CONCERNED, YOU WON'T BE GOING.

>> WE SHOULD GO TO THE DANCE

TOGETHER.

>> I'M IN.

>> SOMEONE ONCE SAID

THAT IT'S CHOICE, NOT CHANCE,

THAT DETERMINES OUR DESTINY.

MY HEAD MADE THE CHOICE

TO END THINGS WITH MATTY.

BUT MY HEART?

MY HEART WAS STILL WAITING

FOR THE CHANCE THAT MY HEAD

MIGHT...

[knocking]

RECONSIDER.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

>> I NEED YOU TO KNOW SOMETHING.

>> OKAY, I'M LISTENING.

>> I LOVE YOU.

>> I REALLY LOVE YOU.

>> WHAT?

>> OH, IT'S OKAY.

WE CAN SHARE.

>> YOU DON'T HAVE TO CHOOSE.

>> BECAUSE WE CAN ALL SHARE.

>> THIS ISN'T REAL.

THIS ISN'T REAL.

THIS ISN'T REAL.

THIS ISN'T REAL.

>> THE AD DOES SEEM FAKE

AND CREEPY.

"WE CAN ALL SHARE."

WHO WANTS THAT?

>> WHAT ARE YOU READING?

>> THE MISSED CONNECTIONS

IN OUR AREA.

I'M SEEING IF ANYONE WAS

TOO SHY TO ASK ME TO THE FORMAL.

BUT THIS SITE IS CLEARLY

ONLY FOR PERVS.

GOD, CAN YOU IMAGINE BUMPING

UGLIES WHILE OTHER PEOPLE WATCH?

>> I CAN, AND IT'S DISTURBING.

>> ARE YOU EXCITED FOR TONIGHT?

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE GOING

TO YOUR FIRST FORMAL

WITHOUT ME.

>> I KNOW.

IT'S NOT GONNA BE THE SAME.

>> WAIT. LISTEN TO THIS.

I'VE BLOWN IT OVER AND OVER

AGAIN, BUT IF YOU GIVE ME

ONE LAST CHANCE, I'LL SWEEP YOU

OFF YOUR FEET

ON THE DANCE FLOOR

AND FINALLY BE YOUR GUY.

[gasps] DOESN'T THAT SOUND

LIKE RICKY?

>> OR MATTY.

>> DON'T DO THIS TO YOURSELF.

IF MATTY HAD ANY GONADS,

HE'D FIGHT FOR YOU.

BUT HE DOESN'T, AND HE DIDN'T.

>> DO YOU THINK DESTINY IS

DETERMINED BY CHANCE OR CHOICE?

>> CHANCE. 100%.

IF DESTINY WAS BY CHOICE,

I WOULD HAVE DEVELOPED AN ASS

INSTEAD OF A MUSTACHE.

>> BUT I WAS THE ONE WHO ENDED

THINGS WITH MATTY.

MAYBE I MISDIRECTED FATE

AND MISSED MY CONNECTION

TO BE WITH HIM.

>> OKAY, YOU'RE GETTING REALLY

DEEP, AND IT'S FAR TOO EARLY

FOR ME TO PROCESS ANYTHING

MORE THAN YOUR MORNING BREATH.

[sniffs]

WHICH, BY THE WAY, IS RANK.

>> DID I SCREW UP MY DESTINY,

OR WAS MY FATE SUPPOSED

TO STINK?

[keyboard clacking]

I'M THINKING I WANT TO WEAR

MY HAIR...

UP.

>> DOWN.

HONEY, YOU HAIR IS THE BEST

WEAPON IN THE FIGHT AGAINST

YOUR HERITAGE.

PRINCESSES DON'T HAVE BIG EARS.

JENNA'S BEEN NOMINATED FOR

SOPHOMORE WINTER PRINCESS.

>> I'D LIKE IT UP.

>> WITH ALL THAT HAIR ON TOP,

YOU'RE JUST GONNA LOOK LIKE

A BOBBLEHEAD.

>> GOOD.

>> BAD NEWS.

I JUST GOT OFF THE PHONE

WITH MING.

SHE'S GOING TONIGHT.

>> WHO IS SHE GOING WITH?

>> SHE SAID IT'S A SURPRISE.

THIS SUCKS.

NOW I'M GONNA BE LONE LOSER'ING.

>> WHY DON'T YOU COME WITH

ME AND JAKE?

>> I'M NOT A DATE-CRASHER.

>> WE'RE GOING AS FRIENDS.

>> I'D DEFINITELY ADD SOME SAUCE

TO THE MIX.

[phone ringing]

>> HAMILTON.

>> HEY.

>> I ALREADY KNOW.

WE CAN'T WEAR THE SAME COLOR

DRESS.

>> GOOD CALL.

CAN TAMARA COME WITH US?

SHE DOESN'T HAVE A DATE, AND...

>> UH, SURE.

I'LL SEE YOU AT 6:00.

>> IS THERE ANYONE HERE

WHO CAN DO SOMETHING

IN THE VEIN OF GRECIAN GODDESS

MEETS GAGA?

LET ME DRAW IT UP FOR YOU.

>> WITH T BY MY SIDE,

A GOOD TIME AT THE DANCE

WAS ALL BUT IN THE CARDS.

>> BOO-YA.

>> POKER IS NOT MY GAME.

>> POKE 'ER?

BUT I DON'T EVEN KNOW HER.

[laughter]

>> YOU GUYS ARE LIKE

A BRAIN TRUST.

>> DUDE, CALL HER ALREADY.

>> both: OOH-OOH-OOH.

>> DOES MCLIGHT HAVE

A GIRLFRIEND?

>> HE DID.

>> OH, [bleep].

YOU GET YOUR ASS HANDED TO YOU

OR WHAT?

>> WASN'T REALLY MY FAULT.

>> IT'S NEVER OUR FAULT,

BUT YOU STILL GOT TO OWN UP

TO WHATEVER YOU THINK THAT SHE

THINKS THAT YOU DID.

>> YEAH, I THINK SHE WANTS ME

TO LEAVE HER ALONE.

>> [scoffs]

>> DUDE, ARE YOU A WUSS?

I SERIOUSLY WANT TO PUNCH YOU

RIGHT NOW.

>> SHE TOLD ME TO TAKE CARE.

>> all: OOH.

>> WHEN SHE SAID IT,

WAS SHE LOOKING DIRECTLY

AT YOU, OR WAS SHE, LIKE,

LOOKING AT THE GROUND,

TWIRLING HER HAIR?

>> THE HAIR TWIRL?

OH, SIGNATURE TELL.

>> IT WAS PRETTY DIRECT.

[all groan]

>> GIVE HER SOMETHING

SHE WANTS.

>> SHE WANTS TO GO

TO THE FORMAL.

>> TAKE HER.

>> I CAN'T.

THE FORMAL'S TONIGHT.

>> SO MAKE IT HAPPEN.

YOU'RE A MCKIBBEN.

MCKIBBENS ARE WINNERS.

>> YOU'RE RIGHT; WE ARE WINNERS.

FLUSH BEATS YOUR STRAIGHT.

[all scream]

>> [screaming]

>> WHAT HAPPENED?

>> ME!

I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE LIKE THIS.

>> DON'T PANIC.

[groans]

WE CAN FIX YOUR HEAD.

>> YEAH, BUT YOU CAN'T FIX

MY DRESS.

YOU WERE RIGHT; IT'S AWFUL.

HAPPY?

>> A LITTLE.

BUT DON'T FRET.

COME ON.

>> THERE'S NOTHING IN YOUR

CLOSET I'M GONNA WANT TO WEAR.

>> WHAT ABOUT THIS?

>> YOU'D LET ME WEAR NANA'S

DRESS?

>> SPECIAL TIMES CALL

FOR SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES.

TRY IT ON.

YOU KNOW, THAT DRESS WAS

SPECIALLY MADE FOR NANA

WHEN SHE WAS A MODEL.

[sighs]

I USED TO THINK, IF I COULD LOOK

AS GOOD AS HER IN IT THAT SHE

WOULD LOVE ME AS MUCH AS SHE

LOVED THAT DRESS.

ISN'T THAT SILLY?

>> YES.

>> THE ONLY TIME SHE EVER

LET ME WEAR IT WAS TO MY PROM.

OH, YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN ME

TRYING TO FIT MY BIG-ASS

PREGNANT BELLY INTO THAT

TINY--

>> DO I LOOK STUPID?

>> YOU LOOK...

PERFECT.

[giggles]

I WANT YOU TO KNOW

THAT I WOULD NEVER LOVE

A DRESS MORE THAN YOU,

UNLESS IT'S VINTAGE CHANEL.

>> UNDERSTANDABLE.

>> JENNA, YOU ARE THE BEST PART

OF ME...

BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT ME.

YOU'RE BETTER.

OH.

I'M SO SORRY.

>> MOM.

CAN'T BREATHE.

GOT TO LET GO.

>> OKAY. OKAY, I'M SORRY.

I WAS JUST HAVING A MOMENT.

I AM ENTITLED ONE ON OCCASION,

CONSIDERING YOU RUINED MY

FIGURE.

>> MOM?

DO YOU THINK YOU WERE MEANT

TO BE WITH DAD?

I MEAN, IF I WASN'T HERE,

WOULD YOU HAVE CHOSEN HIM?

>> HMM.

THERE WAS NEVER A CHOICE.

[doorbell rings]

>> JEN!

THE GIRLS ARE HERE!

>> IF I WASN'T GOING TO LET FATE

INFLUENCE MY DECISIONS,

I WOULDN'T LET SOME VILE

LETTER DO IT EITHER.

IT WAS TIME TO PUT MY PAST

WHERE IT BELONGED...

IN THE PAST.

>> MING'S GOING WITH VERA.

>> SURPRISE.

>> HI.

CAN WE SIDEBAR?

IS THERE SOMETHING YOU WANT

TO TELL ME, BECAUSE I'M PRETTY

SURE VERA IS OF THE ELLEN

VARIETY.

>> GOING WITH A GIRL FRIEND

WAS THE ONLY WAY MY PARENTS

WOULD LET ME GO.

SO IF I HAVE TO LET HER

FEEL ME UP AT THE END

OF THE NIGHT, I'M DOWN

FOR THE CAUSE.

>> GIRLS, GET TOGETHER.

>> LOOK AT YOU.

>> OKAY, NOW, CHINS OUT

AND DOWN.

>> DAD, I THINK YOUR ALLERGIES

ARE ACTING UP AGAIN.

>> NO.

I'M CRYING.

>> DAMN YOU, 'CAUSE NOW

I'M CRYING.

>> CAN YOU BELIEVE WE DID THIS?

>> [laughs]

>> WE RAISED A BEAUTIFUL GIRL.

>> YOU'RE EMBARRASSING JENNA.

>> YOU'RE BOTH EMBARRASSING

JENNA.

[doorbell rings]

>> IT'S YOUR DATE.

[squeals]

>> [laughs] THANKS.

CAN I PLEASE SPEAK TO JENNA?

>> YOU JUST MISSED HER.

SHE'S ON HER WAY TO THE FORMAL

WITH HER FRIENDS.

>> ALL RIGHT, YOU'RE GOOD.

BUT YOU MIGHT WAN TO RETHINK

THE LAMBSKIN RUBBER IN YOUR BAG.

THEY DON'T REALLY WORK.

>> SADIE.

I KNEW IT.

THAT LITTLE--

YOU ARE FORBODEN

FROM THIS DANCE,

FORBODEN FOR...

LOOKING SO FABULOUS.

>> KITTEN, YOU NEED TO RELAX.

>> I KNOW.

IT'S JUST, SADIE ALWAYS

UNDERCUTS MY AUTHORITY,

AND I JUST KNOW SHE'S GONNA

CRASH.

"KITTEN"?

>> TOO SOON?

>> NOT AT ALL, MY VELVET

VINDALOO.

>> OOH.

[laughs]

RRRR.

GO. GO IN.

>> UH, MR. MISHRA.

>> J, MY GIRL. LOOK AT YOU.

I DIDN'T KNOW ROSATI WAS

THE GUY YOU'VE BEEN TELLING ME

ABOUT.

>> YEP.

JAKE'S MY DATE.

>> ALL RIGHT, YOU TWO LOVEBIRDS

HAVE A GOOD TIME.

BUT WATCH THE BUMP-AND-GRIND.

WE'RE TRYING TO KEEP THIS

SHINDIG A PG.

GOOD.

>> PRINCIPAL COX WANTS TO

DISCUSS THE DRESS CODE.

>> OH, I KNOW.

SOME OF THESE KIDS ARE REALLY

PUSHING THE BOUNDARIES.

>> HE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU.

>> [scoffs]

I WORE THIS TO MY GRANDMOTHER'S

FUNERAL.

>> I KNOW.

>> DORK ALERT.

WE ARE HERE WAY TOO EARLY.

>> MS. HAMILTON, ALLOW ME

TO EDUCATE YOU.

IT'S ALL ABOUT ARRIVING EARLY.

THAT WAY, WE GET OUR PICTURES

TAKEN BEFORE WE RUIN OUR HAIR

OUT ON THE DANCE FLOOR.

>> YOU'RE GONNA DANCE.

>> LADIES, PREPARE YOURSELVES.

* I LIKE TO RIP IT UP

* AND IT AIN'T PRETTY

>> UNLIKE MATTY, JAKE WASN'T

AFRAID TO BE A DORK.

AND I WAS READY TO DORK OUT

WITH HIM.

[upbeat pop music]

*

>> UH, DO YOU THINK I COULD

GET ONE, JUST THE TWO OF US?

>> all: OOH.

>> OW! OW!

>> YEAH, JENNA.

>> OKAY.

[phone dings]

>> I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

>> [grunts]

DON'T YANK ME.

MY DRESS IS COUTURE.

>> I'M DOING THE BEST I CAN.

I JUST--YOU'RE SO...

>> SO WHAT?

>> WIGGLY.

[door opens]

>> YEAH.

>> DUCK.

>> HE'S SO SWEET.

I'M GLAD HE INVITED ME.

>> YEAH, IT'S BEEN FUN.

LIP GLOSS?

>> I NOTICED YOU WERE WITH JAKE.

>> WE'RE JUST FRIENDS.

>> I DON'T CARE.

WE'RE NOT TOGETHER ANYMORE.

JENNA?

YOU LOOK REALLY PRETTY.

>> THANKS.

SO DO YOU.

>> WHAT WAS THAT?

"YOU LOOK REALLY PRETTY."

HELP ME IN SO I CAN SLAP YOU.

>> NO.

>> NO?

>> YOU'RE A BITCH, AND IT'S

YOUR FAULT JAKE DUMPED ME.

BREAK IN YOURSELF.

>> [screams]

>> * UH, UH

* OW

[pulsing rock music]

* THE MERCURY'S RISING

* AND THERE AIN'T

* NO DISGUISING

>> I WAS LIVING IN THE MOMENT,

AND I DIDN'T KNOW IF IT WAS

BY CHANCE OR BY CHOICE,

BUT I DIDN'T CARE.

IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO BUST

A MOVE.

>> * HOT SUMMER NIGHT

* EVEN THOUGH IT'S THE MIDDLE

* OF THE WINTER

* AND IT'S REALLY BAD WEATHER

* IT'S A HOT SUMMER NIGHT

* WHEN I'M NEXT TO YOU

* BABY

* WHOO!

>> I'M BUSY.

>> LISTEN TO ME, PLEASE.

IF YOU GIVE ME ONE MORE CHANCE,

I'LL SWEEP YOU OFF YOUR FEET.

>> ON THE DANCE FLOOR...

>> both: AND FINALLY BE

YOUR GUY.

>> IT'S YOU.

>> NO, IT'S YOU.

IT'S ALWAYS BEEN YOU.

I WAS JUST TOO BLIND TO SEE IT.

>> * DON'T LET IT GO TO WASTE

>> WHERE'D TAMARA GO?

>> RICKY'S THE MISSED

CONNECTION.

>> HE'S HER WHAT?

>> IT'S A LONG STORY.

>> LOOK, I ONLY HAVE 60 BUCKS,

BUT I CAN PROMISE YOU THAT

HELPING ME GET IN IS LIKE

THE GIFT THAT WILL KEEP ON

GIVING.

LIKE YOUR ACNE.

LIGHTEN UP.

IT WAS A JOKE.

I CAN DOUBLE YOUR MONEY

ON MONDAY.

>> YOU HAVING A GOOD TIME?

>> YEAH.

YOU?

>> I ALWAYS HAVE A GOOD TIME

WITH YOU.

>> IT WAS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS

THINKING.

EVERYTHING WITH JAKE WAS EASY.

>> EVERYTHING WITH YOU IS...

EASY.

>> DO YOU THINK THINGS

HAPPEN TO US BY CHANCE

OR BY CHOICE?

>> IN WHAT WAY?

>> FATE.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN FATE?

>> I DON'T KNOW.

BUT CONSIDERING YOU'RE HERE

WITH ME RIGHT NOW

MEANS THE UNIVERSE IS WORKING

IN MY FAVOR.

>> MAYBE THE UNIVERSE

WAS WORKING IN MY FAVOR TOO.

*

>> * OH

* EVERYBODY'S STARRY-EYED

* AND EVERYBODY KNOWS

* OH

* EVERYBODY'S STARRY-EYED

>> EVERYTHING WAS AS IT WAS

MEANT TO BE, 'CAUSE FINALLY

THE OTHER GUY I HAD BEEN

PINING OVER WAS ALL BUT

>> HEY, MAN.

>> HEY.

>> I'M REALLY STOKED

YOU MADE IT.

WHO'D YOU COME WITH?

>> NOBODY.

THERE WAS A GIRL,

BUT I MESSED IT UP.

>> OH. WHAT HAPPENED?

>> YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW.

>> I DO.

>> AH, WELL, I WAS GONNA TAKE

THIS GIRL, THIS GREAT GIRL.

AND THEN THINGS GOT COMPLICATED,

AND I WAS TRYING NOT TO HURT

SOMEONE ELSE, BUT I ENDED UP

HURTING HER.

I DIDN'T THINK SHE WAS GONNA

COME, SO I WENT TO HER HOUSE.

>> YOU WENT TO HER HOUSE.

>> YEAH, HER DAD SAID SHE WAS

HERE.

>> WELL, WHERE IS SHE?

>> SHE'S WITH ANOTHER GUY.

>> DUDE, THAT SUCKS.

YOU SHOULD STEAL HER AWAY.

>> NAH, I THINK IT'S TOO LATE.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

IS IT TOO LATE?

>> I WAS CONFUSED.

I DIDN'T KNOW IF I SHOULD

LISTEN TO MY HEAD

OR MY HEART.

SO I WENT WITH MY HAND.

I'M SO SORRY.

I THINK YOU'RE RIGHT.

IT'S TOO LATE.

[feedback over PA]

>> OKAY, CHECK ONE, TWO.

[clears throat]

HELLO.

TIME TO ANNOUNCE THIS YEAR'S

WINTER FORMAL COURT.

[cheers and applause]

OKAY, LET'S GET DOWN TO SOME

BUSINESS ON SOME...

DICK.

DICK WALTERS, TAKE OVER.

>> OKAY.

>> PUT THE COOKIE DOWN,

MS. SAXTON.

YOU ARE TO LEAVE IMMEDIATELY.

>> OR WHAT?

>> OR I'LL HAVE YOU EXPELLED.

>> REALLY? FOR WHAT?

>> YOU KNOW WHAT.

STEALING JENNA'S FILE.

>> THE FILE ISN'T MISSING

ANYMORE, IS IT?

AND I BET MY MERCEDES THAT YOU

NEVER REPORTED IT STOLEN.

>> I DID NOT.

>> WELL, THEN I GUESS

IT'S JUST YOUR WORD

AGAINST MINE.

>> VAL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

>> UH, I DON'T--I DON'T...

>> MR. MISHRA,

SHE JUST ACCOSTED ME,

AND YOU WITNESSED IT.

>> I DIDN'T WITNESS ANYTHING.

>> I WILL HAVE YOU BOTH FIRED.

>> GO FOR IT.

I BET MY CAMRY THAT YOUR WORD

AGAINST OURS WON'T GET YOU

VERY FAR.

HMM?

YOU'VE JUST BEEN SUCKER PUNCHED.

>> THIS IS ACTUALLY MINE.

>> UGH!

>> OKAY, OKAY, THAT'S GOOD.

THANK YOU.

NOW FOR SOPHOMORE WINTER COURT.

ENVELOPES, PLEASE.

HUH! GOT 'EM RIGHT HERE.

KNEW THAT.

SOPHOMORE PRINCESS IS...

CLARK STEVENSON.

>> [squealing]

[applause]

>> YOU'RE WELCOME.

GO, GIRL.

OKAY, AND SOPHOMORE PRINCE

IS...

MATTY MCKIBBEN.

>> ALL RIGHT.

>> MATTY!

[cheers and applause]

>> * I BREATHE, I BREATHE

* I BREATHE

* I BREATHE

* I BREATHE, I BREATHE

>> ONE DOOR TO MY HEART

HAD CLOSED,

WHICH MEANT A NEW ONE

COULD OPEN.

>> I JUST WANT TO SAY

I SHARE THIS WITH YOU,

JENNA HAMILTON.

[applause]

[electronic dance music playing]

*

>> OH, COME ON. ONE MORE.

[sighs]

WHAT?

>> YOU REALLY LIKE TO DANCE.

>> YEAH.

>> WE'RE GONNA HIT UP

JOSH HARRISON'S AFTER PARTY.

YOU GUYS WANT TO COME?

>> HARRISON'S PARENTS HAVE

A WATER BED.

>> RICKY!

>> IT'S UP TO YOU.

>> I THINK WE'RE GONNA PASS.

>> LET'S GET OUR STUFF.

>> OKAY.

>> OKAY.

THERE'S SOMETHING STUCK

TO YOUR BACK.

>> IS THAT, LIKE, DIRTY CODE?

>> LIKE WHAT?

>> LIKE...

>> LIKE THERE'S A NOTE

STUCK TO YOUR BACK.

>> OH, MY PARENTS ARE OVER

AT MY NEIGHBORS', WHICH MEANS

THEY'RE GETTING HAMMERED

AND THEY AREN'T COMING HOME

ANYTIME SOON.

>> HMM.

>> DO YOU WANT TO COME IN?

>> YES.

>> ACTUALLY, IS IT OKAY

IF YOU DON'T COME IN?

>> SURE.

>> I MEAN, IT'S NOT THAT

I DON'T WANT YOU TO.

I DO.

BUT I WANT TO TAKE THINGS

SLOWLY.

>> LOOK, THERE'S NO RUSH.

I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE.

WHAT IS IT?

>> TONIGHT IS THE FIRST NIGHT

ANYONE HAS EVER HELD MY HAND

IN PUBLIC,

BESIDES MY PARENTS.

>> DOES THAT FREAK YOU OUT?

>> NO.

IT JUST MAKES ME REALIZE

WHAT I'VE BEEN MISSING.

[alarm blaring]

>> [laughing]

[alarm blaring]

>> LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE.

I'VE COMPLETELY BLANKED

ON THE ALARM CODE,

AND NOW I HAVE TO CALL

MY PARENTS.

>> DO YOU WANT ME TO STAY?

>> NO.

>> OKAY.

HEY, DON'T BE FREAKED OUT

IF I CALL YOU WHEN I GET HOME.

>> I WON'T.

I'LL ONLY BE FREAKED OUT

IF YOU DON'T.

HEY, IT'S ME.

I'M HOME, AND I CAN'T REMEMBER

THE ALARM CODE.

WAIT.

THE CODE IS IN THE JUNK DRAWER.

NEVER MIND.

[alarm blaring]

SOMEONE ONCE SAID THAT IT'S

CHOICE, NOT CHANCE, THAT

DETERMINES OUR DESTINY.

BUT IT WAS HARD FOR ME

TO PROCESS WHO WOULD EVER

CHOOSE TO FIND WHAT I FOUND.

IT WAS CHANCE.