All language subtitles for Murphy Brown s04e16 Lovesick

I'm sorry, Miles, but I just can't
handle this story.

I've covered famine, floods, and the
collapse of the inner city, but this is

just too bleak and depressing.

Oh, snap out of it, Frank. Look, we're
doing an hour on the Democratic

candidates, and that's final.

Who's going to sponsor it?

Sominix?

There's no way we can make it
interesting. It's like a lopsided Miss

pageant. Oh, sure, maybe some of them
can twirl a baton or play the bassoon,

in the end, George Bush is still the
cute girl from Texas and the Democrats

49 bow -wows from other states.

So, my little world traveler, how is
merry old England?

Cold, wet, and full of restaurants with
names like the sow's belly. It's a

pregnant woman's nightmare.

But at least my interview with the prime
minister went great.

Hey there, Murphy.

Welcome back.

What can I get you? Oh, just a cup of
soda and another roll of Tums. My

stomach's killing me. You all right,
Murphy? You're looking a little pale.

He's right. You don't have any color in
your face.

If you ask me, she's pushing herself too
hard.

You're six months pregnant, Murphy.

You keep flying around like this, you're
going to deliver that kid on a baggage

carousel at Dulles Airport.

Everybody overreacting. It's just a
little jet lag.

I'm going to get you some vegetable soup
to go, and if you'll take my advice,

you'll eat it at home.

Bill's right, Murphy.

You have to face the fact that you can't
do certain things you were able to do

six months ago.

Like wear plaid, for example.

Oh. Your lord, look what the cat dragged
in. Jerry Gold. What is he doing here?

You guys always do this. And you know
how I feel about him. I'm going to ask

to join us, and if anyone has a problem
with that, they can leave.

Well, hi there, gang. How's it going?

Well, there they go, ladies and
gentlemen. The highest paid mime troupe

television.

Hi, Jer.

This is a surprise.

You're telling me.

I can't believe after five weeks of
playing phone tag, I finally run into

here.

Wow. Let me look at you.

I know.

I'm huge, aren't I?

Well, I'll be honest, Brown.

I wasn't sure how I would feel about
watching your body go through this

pregnancy, but I gotta say, it's
something that's amazing and spiritual.

Jer, do you really mean that?

No, but you outweigh me now, and I'm
afraid of it.

Oh, I have some great news.

I'm going back on the air again.

Jerry, you got a show?

That's fantastic. What is it? Let's just
call it an alternative to Meet the

Press with yours truly as host.

I'm calling it Cut the Crap.

What can I say? It's pure gold.

Here you go, Murphy.

Hot soup and a little fresh bread.

Now, there's a brilliant idea.

Eating an antacid before you eat Phil's
food.

This could spread like wildfire.

Keep making jokes, you may have an
unfortunate encounter with some bad

mayonnaise. Accidents can happen.

Are you okay, Brian? You don't look so
good.

Oh, it's no big deal. It's probably just
some bug I picked up in England.

I wouldn't fool around with this,
Murphy. A lot of things can happen when

pregnant. What's that supposed to mean?
What did he mean by that?

Well, it's nothing. It's just a
stomachache, that's all.

Um, maybe just some cramps.

And a tiny bit of pain in the lower
back.

Murphy, I think you should go to the
doctor. Phil, the woman's an adult. She

make her own decisions.

You want to go to the doctor? I can
drive you. I'm not one of these women

run to the doctor every time she
sneezes.

Ow! Will you take her to the damn
doctor?

Should I take you to the damn doctor?
Take me to the damn doctor.

I don't know, Brown. That was a very
quiet drive home.

I can't believe you didn't say anything
when I let Clarence Thomas merge in

front of us.

Sorry, I...

Guess I wasn't paying attention.

Look, the doctor said that everything's
probably going to be fine. I wouldn't

worry. I'm not worried.

Although if they don't want you to
worry, they could come up with a better

for what I have than preterm labor.

I agree. So we won't call it preterm
labor. We'll call it Fred.

Right. And preterm Fred happens to a lot
of women over 40.

There you go.

Spending the next two weeks immobile
could almost be a vacation. Absolutely.

if I take the medication and the
contractions stop, there's no reason why

can't resume a normal schedule.

No reason at all.

Then why am I so scared?

Ah, home at last.

You know, I was starting to think they
finally caught you stealing one of those

little blankets off the plane.

You remember Jerry?

Yeah. You're the one who's not the
father.

Lovely to see you again, too. All right.

So, Brown, what about these pills? The
doctor said you can take one every hour

if you have to. Well, wait.

Wait a minute.

You went to the doctor?

I thought our next appointment wasn't
until the 15th. Eldon, I'm going to tell

you something. Now, your first instinct
may be to get a little upset. I want you

to fight that.

I have a condition. It's called preterm
labor. Now, what you... Oh, my God!

Oh, my God! I knew something like this
could happen! We were too happy! I was

too relaxed!

You could not...

You cannot have this baby now. What are
you doing sitting? Lie down.

Lie down. Cross your legs. Cross your
legs.

I'm not ready for this.

I'm only up to the sixth month and here
comes baby.

All we should be dealing with are leg
cramps and an itchy abdomen.

Delivery. Delivery.

Well, this is great. You're having a
kid. He's having a cow.

I am not ready for this baby yet. The
nursery is nowhere near finished.

You gave me nine months. That's what you
promised.

That's what you promised me. Has a
verbal agreement become meaningless in

society? Alan, will you calm down? I
have no intention of having this baby

before I do the economic summit next
month in Frankfurt. I have to do

I know, I know. I'll get you some tea.
Yes, yes, tea. That'll help you relax.

All right, all right. I'll have a cup of
blackberry. No, no, no, no, no. That's

too wild, too woodsy. You'll have
chamomile.

Chamomile with lemon? No, too acidic.

You'll have milk and you'll have honey.
I want sugar.

Oh, I think not.

you all right with this guy here, Brown?

Wouldn't you rather check into hell for
the next two weeks?

I'll be fine.

I get to spend some quality time with
myself, wondering whatever made me think

could have a normal pregnancy.

You know, Murphy, why don't I stop in a
couple of times a day just to see how

you're doing? Maybe bring you something
to eat.

Oh. Oh, no.

You see what just happened here?

I became needy. I hate that. You looked
at this pathetic bag of surging hormones

and you felt obligated.

I told you months ago if you needed me,
I'd be around. This seems like a good

time. Chair, you live a half an hour
away and you're starting a new show. Are

you really going to want to schlep all
the way over here twice a day?

Yeah, I guess that's pretty stupid.

Although, there is another way around
this. I could just...

Stay here.

Stay here?

What does that mean, stay here?

Move in.

Bring in a few things, and then when
you're back on your feet, move out.

What do you think?

What do I think?

I think it sounds a lot like living
together, and my only experience in that

area was a marriage that lasted only
slightly longer than Woodstock.

I'm talking about a temporary thing
here. What if we drive each other crazy?

Then we'll talk about it. When have you
and I ever held anything back?

That's true. We are honest with each
other. So what do you say? You want to

it a try?

There's too much talking out here.

Her lips are moving much too much. And
why are you sitting up? Lie down.

Stay.

God, it's going to be a long two weeks.

I guess I could use someone to run
interference for me.

Maybe we could give it a shot.

All right.

You're on.

I'll go pack up some of my stuff, but
first, just to prove it'll be nice to

another person around, how about a
shoulder rub?

Ooh, that sounds great.

Good, but just not too hard. I'm very
sensitive around that.

I didn't want to have to keep running
back and forth to my place.

That makes sense.

I cleared out some drawers for you.

One and a half.

All right, fine. I guess I can just
leave all this in the car and run out

to change every morning.

But I sleep in the nude and your
neighbors look like they frighten

I guess I'm just a little nervous about
all this. Even though it's only

temporary, it's still kind of a big step
for us, isn't it? You're telling me I

went to put your key in my keychain and
I couldn't do it.

I kept picturing my parents' wedding
photo.

No wonder my dad's eyes are rolled up
into the back of his head.

I'll get it. Brown, what are you doing?

Well, I'm allowed to walk a little.

If Painter Man ever saw that, he'd come
after me with a spackle knife.

Sit down.

Let me do something for you, okay?

Oh, I'm sorry, but we got rid of all of
our Halloween candy months ago.

What's he doing here? I knew we should
have called first.

Now, everyone, let's not forget the
important thing is to make sure Murphy

the baby are all right.

Murphy, are you and the baby all right?

We're fine, Corky.

Okay, now we can leave.

We'll be back after he's gone.

When will that be?

Gee, didn't you get our announcement?

I've moved in.

over with each other first. I think we
never made a pact like that. Well, we

should have.

You could have stopped me from the Judy
fiasco of August 84.

I can't believe this.

She won't have a dog, but she lets Jerry
Gold stay here.

Nice hair, Sherwood. What's that show
you're on again?

Hullabaloo?

Okay, that's it.

Everybody to a neutral corner.

Now, first of all, not that it's any of
your business, Jerry's only here to help

until I'm back on my feet.

So, Jerry?

Uh, do you find the couch a comfortable
place to sleep?

Oh, I'm sorry, Jim. The couch is not the
correct answer. But you played very

well. We have some lovely parting gifts
for you.

Gee, Jerry, will you stop egging them
on?

He can't help himself, Murphy. He's
hostile because you're a shiksa.

Deep down inside, he hates himself for
choosing you over his religion.

Stick to your own kind. One of your own
kind.

Gee, Silverberg, that was a lovely
performance, but the role of Anita has

already been cast.

Will you stop it? Why can't you get
along with my friends? You know it

me, and I think it shows a lack of
respect for how I feel. Yeah, what about

feelings? Is that any consideration?

Oh, did you hear that? They're already
into the you -don't -care -about -my

-feeling stage.

It's almost over. By this time tomorrow,
he'll be gone. Just another bug smashed

in the windshield of Murphy's life. Shut
up!

kicking him out. This is how Jerry and I
communicate. Our relationship is based

on total honesty.

We always say exactly what we mean all
the time. Murph, that is so thick.

Interesting comment coming from a man
whose most successful relationship was

with Debbie, the inflatable love doll.

Stop it. What did I just say?

What? What did I do? Oh, don't give me
that. All I ask is that you make a

little... Yeah, wait a second. I didn't
invite them over here. And frankly, I am

not going to be crying.

Why do I make a difficult call? What
were they doing the whole time? I still

think it's sick. Me too. You better take
good care of her while you're here,

sleeping in the den.

You know, it's really sad.

Some people just can't stand to see a
happy couple.

It's just me, one of the throng that now
live here.

Whoa. Whatever happened, it looks like
you put up a hell of a fight.

What difference does it make how I look,
Eldon? I've been stuck in this house

for ten days with nothing to do. I'm
going out of my mind.

So he's late again, huh?

There's no late, Eldon.

Jerry doesn't have to punch a clock.
That's not the kind of relationship we

have.

What time is it?

8 .30.

You know, I don't know about you, but I
really wouldn't mind getting our house

back.

That man has so many disgusting habits.

You know, when he tears the paper towel
off the roll, he completely disregards

the perforation.

Always leaves a little piece hanging.

I find that very annoying.

Does that annoy you?

I never even noticed, Eldon. And let me
tell you something. If you want to have

a successful relationship with someone,
you can't be so set in your ways.

Flexibility and compromise.

That's the key.

Hi, kids.

I don't want to panic anybody, but I
heard on the radio that the entire

of North and South Dakota have just been
sold to the Japanese.

Actually, they only wanted North Dakota,
but Bush wouldn't break up the set.

So what do you think? The opening for my
new show.

What a hundredth time.

When you load the dishwasher, you rinse
your plate.

It's common courtesy.

So, how are you feeling today? Any pain,
any contractions?

Nope.

Yeah, well, that's good. That makes
eight days without a contraction, right?

Yep.

I had a great meeting with my producer
today. We went over the plans for the

set. Really looks good.

How was your day?

Oh, wonderful.

So satisfying to know that at the end of
your day you'll have a pair of salad

tongs you can actually see your face in.

Something bothering you?

Me? No. Why do you ask?

I don't know. If you polish that
silverware anymore, you're going to

molecular structure.

Look, we said we're going to be honest
with each other.

What's bothering you?

All right. I guess I'm just...

I'm annoyed that you're late.

I'm late?

I wasn't aware that I had to be here at
any assigned time.

You don't, but I thought it was
understood that you'd be here for dinner

we could eat together.

You know, like other couples do. There,
I've said it. I'm done.

Well, I didn't know that's what you
wanted. Now I do. See?

It wasn't so bad.

And why?

Because we were honest.

And honesty is what it's all about.

I also hate sharing my closet with you,
hate that you record it over my phone

message, hate that grunting noise you
make every time you get out of a chair,

and hate how you rip the paper towels.

Geez, Brown, why don't you plunge that
butter knife in a little deeper?

You don't have to be that honest. I
don't tell you everything.

What do you mean you don't tell me
everything?

Well, I thought it better not to mention
that I'm getting a little tired of

seeing you in that outfit.

What is it, three days now?

And I miss that special little styling
touch you used to do with your hair. I

think it's called...

Call me.

What's the point if you're never around
to appreciate it? Look, if you wanted me

to stay home tonight, why didn't you
just say so?

Because if you stay home just because I
want you to, then it doesn't count that

you stayed home.

Oh, my God, listen to that whiny voice.
I'm being needy again.

I hate that.

You know what the real problem is?

There's no room for me here.

And I'm not talking about the four
inches of closet space I've got or the

that I have to shave in the laundry
sink.

There is no room for me in your life,
Brown.

You won't let anybody in.

What is so damn hard about telling
somebody that you need them, even for a

couple of weeks?

Because I hate being vulnerable, all
right?

I hate waiting for someone to come home,
and I hate that it matters if you're

late and don't call.

And I hate the fact that tonight at 7 o
'clock I found myself thinking I should

call. And that made me feel
claustrophobic, so I didn't call. And

feel guilty, which then made me feel
resentful.

Well, it's just great.

You resent being here, and I resent
having you here.

Yeah, I guess you can't get any more
honest than that, huh?

I want you to come right down to the
table and sit in this chair.

Can I get you tea or something?

Corky, I told you already, I don't need
any special treatment.

Well, a cup of tea would be nice.

Now, Merv, I want you to be straight
with us. Are you feeling okay?

I mean, should you even be here? I'm
fine, Frank. The doctor told me that I

have to make a few little adjustments
until the baby's born.

Shorter work days, more rest, no flying.

So I won't be able to cover the economic
summit next month, Miles.

Don't worry.

There's always a way to work it out. The
important thing is that you rest a

little. That's just what Dr. Barton
said. She said if I get tense, I should

put on one of those relaxation tapes and
just kind of space out.

So do you have a spare tape of last
night's show?

Thought I'd stop in and see how
everything went at the doctor's this

Oh, pretty well.

I got the all clear to be up and around
again.

Only a little less up and not quite as
around as before.

Good.

That's good.

I just wanted you to know that I packed
up all my stuff this morning.

I mean, now that everything's okay.

Here's your key.

Oh.

Well, thanks.

That was an agreement, right?

Two weeks and out.

That's what we said.

It's not like we expected it to turn
into anything more, right?

Right. We tried something and it didn't
work out.

Klaus and Sonny Von Bulow didn't work
out. We were a disaster.

So... Thanks for helping.

I guess I'll see you around sometime.

What are you talking about?

I'm talking about calling it quits,
aren't you?

Geez, Brown, why does everything have to
be so black and white with you?

I was just talking about slowing it
down, that's all.

Really?

Just how slow were you thinking?

Very slow.

Economic recovery slow.

We go back to dating, and then once in a
while, if the roads are bad or if

there's a good late movie on, I spend
the night.

And then maybe if we don't kill each
other, we work up to a weekend.

Maybe.

If you can overcome that chronic paper
towel tearing problem... I'll work on

You'll agree to burn that disgusting
bathrobe.

Trout of Turin is in better shape.

So, what do you say?

It's a deal.

When do you want to get together?

Looks like my schedule's going to be a
lot lighter.

Well, that figures. Just when mine's
heating up.

I go to New York tomorrow. How about
dinner on Monday?

Uh, no, I'm speaking at American
University. What about Tuesday? No,

leave for Chicago.

Uh, Thursday the 20th. Uh, no, good.
What about Tuesday the 25th? Yeah, I'm

clear.

All right.

Three weeks from tomorrow.

Geez.

Three weeks.

I know.

This is a great relationship, isn't it?

It's perfect.

Up next, false alarm for Roseanne. That
new car's got heated seats.

It's got heated seats?

Thank God. I thought I was going through
the change.

Roseanne is coming up next on Nick at
Night. Stay tuned.