Original subtitles

One word, we are back!

Well, actually, that's three words.

But we're not splitting hairs

as we're bringing you the best unseen action

from the first week in the Love Island villa!

# Are you ready for this? #

And talking of hairs...

I need to shave my minge.

..things are moving fast. Ooh.

They've been in the villa less than seven days

and, already, we've seen more than our fair share of...

dumpings... APPLAUSE

..trumpings... FARTS

..bumping...

screaming... SCREAMS

..and things that go bump in the night.

# Are you ready? #

So sit down... Oh, it's soaking wet.

Oh, no, not there!

And enjoy an hour of unaired action from the villa

that's all killer, no filler.

Well, sort of almost no filler.

You can get filler in your dick. You can get filler in your willy?!

This is Love Island Unseen Bits!

BELCHES # Are you ready? #

Excuse me!

# We're back and we're better Better

# Better than ever before... #

Welcome to Love Island Unseen Bits.

THEY LAUGH AND CHEER

Some things may be new,

but the principle of this show is exactly the same.

I am gonna wet myself, I'm really sorry.

We bring you a show packed with the finest unseen action from the villa.

We are fit to burst.

I'm gonna wet myself in a second.

# We're back and we're better Better

# Better than ever before... #

We're up and running.

There's no stopping me in these.

We've got a spring in our step.

Bro, that's a trampoline, innit? THEY LAUGH

It's called a trampoline, right?

Our Islanders' teeth are shining and their tushes are shaking

as we settle down to some highbrow chat.

I was 22, I'm so different now. Do you think?

Your frontal lobe's developed. My what?

Did you not know what that is? No!

OK, so, your frontal lobe's like... Here we go.

It is the nerd talk. Oh, you are a nerd.

So, your frontal lobe is, like, a part of your brain that develops

when you're, like, 25. Stop!

And your brain's not fully developed until then.

So people say, when you're 25, like, your frontal lobe kicks in.

And the men, like, you start realising, he's a dickhead.

Oh, is that why they're immature?

When do theirs grow? When they're 30?

Probably. They're probably a bit underdeveloped. Immature.

It's gonna be TV gold.

Let's go!

THEY LAUGH

Mwah! Yeah!

# Better than ever before. #

'Love Fest' by Lady Bri

# Whoo! Come feel the love... #

Well, let's go right back to the beginning of time.

Well, actually, just six days ago, and before the revamped villa

had been stamped on by massive corked wedges.

# It's a love fest... #

The revamped villa was looking fresh.

# Feelin' our best... #

There's the beautiful bedrooms.

# It's a love fest... #

Done-up dressing rooms.

The overhauled outside kitchen.

Oh, yes, and an entirely new tube station

slap bang in the middle of the villa.

TfL - Transport For Love -

have finally finished that 1,334km line extension,

stretching all the way to Majorca's brand-new Loverpool Street station.

# Everyone here's beautiful I love the way... #

And the very first passenger to arrive on the Maya Line

were Shakira and Meg.

I'm literally shaking... THEY SQUEAL

Ready? Let's run, go. Let's go.

Look at us. We look absolutely stunning.

Ten out of tens.

I mean, by choice. I know, exactly.

# It's love Oh, no, it's a love fest... #

Oh! I feel like I'm gonna fall over.

I know. My feet are sweating.

This is a public service announcement

on behalf of Transport For Love.

Would all girls change here for Hydeaway Park Corner?

THEY CHEER

Oh, you look amazing! Oh, my goodness!

Hello, darling!

I'm Megan, nice to meet you. No! I'm Meg. Megan! No!

We should do, like, Megs and Meg. No, Megs and Meg.

That's gonna get confusing.

Oh, God, it's gonna get bloody confusing, isn't it?

Are we excited for the boys to come? I was about to ask.

When are they getting here? Like, you know?

Erm, hello? We're ready! You're late.

Unfortunately, all the boys were delayed

as there was a Jama on the Maya Line.

# It's the sound Of the underground... #

THEY CHEER

As we say here at Transport For Love,

see it, say it, scream it at the top of your lungs.

Welcome to Love Island!

And soon approaching Graftington Crescent

was a whole bunch of new Islanders.

Hello!

Mind the chaps. Hello, hello, hello.

# It's the sound Of the underground... #

Hello, hello. Welcome to the villa!

Hello, how we getting on? Hello!

What's happening, Maya? Are you all right?

What's happening? Oi-oi! What's happening?

Let's find out if he's the one. Hello, Tommy!

How are you doing, Meg? Are you all right?

Hi, Tommy. How are you? Lovely to meet you. You, too.

The Love Island journey may have started on track

when Ben was coupled up with Shakira,

Dejon with Meg, Harry with Sophie,

Blu with Alima, Conor with Helena,

Tommy was with Megan.

But as we now all know, most of them came off the rails.

All change, please!

Before I let them in my villa, I always invite the Islanders

to my top-secret TV studio for a little chat,

which is in my loft.

What's happening? What's happening?

GASPS

Here are some unseen bits you didn't get to see

the first time round.

GASPS My shoe! Oh, no!

# I'm like, "Ooh, ah" Jaw drops... #

It just feels like... It's like I'm on TV!

You are, Meg. Here, catch this.

# I'm thinking wow

# I need it now... #

Oh, my God.

I am excited. SHE LAUGHS

Sorry!

I am VERY excited!

# Wow, wow, wow

# Hit me like A triple caffeine kick-in

# Am I on fire Or am I just trippin'? #

SHE LAUGHS

Like, when I say I'm single,

I'm "single" with 15 men on my phone.

My little wandering eyes go bing, bing, bing, bing, bing.

# I'm thinking wow... #

Every single red flag I see, I'm like, yeah, that'd be fun.

I'm looking forward to all the snogging in the villa,

but the only thing I'm not looking forward to was my nan watching it.

I think that a guy shouldn't take food home on a first date.

It's happened to me before and that gave me the ick.

# Wow, wow, wow, wow Wow, wow, wow... #

Someone was sick in my car,

I thought I'd just, like, be sick with her,

and it'd just be a whole mess of just...

just a concoction of not goodness.

# I'm thinking wow... #

I'm excited to get my flirt on.

A bit of a flirt? A lot of a flirt.

SHE CLICKS TONGUE

Every Wednesday morning, we go to the retirement flats,

and the old girls are out straight away with their cup of coffee.

Give her a little flirt. "Oh, you look nice, Doris.

"Cor, how old are you? 65?"

She's in her 90s, but I've got to be nice, haven't I?

# Wow, wow, wow. #

Thanks, Meg. Can I have my inflatable heart back, please?

I'm off down the beach.

After being paired up, it was time for our couples'

inevitable "getting to know you" chats.

These can be quite nerve-wracking affairs,

and poor Helena started to fall to pieces almost immediately.

All my eyelashes are falling off. It's ridiculous.

Meg and Dejon's connection was written in the stars.

Do you, erm... believe in star signs?

Yeah. I do read my star sign, yeah.

Before I come out here, it was something like,

the 6th and 7th of June is gonna be, like, a day of love.

And it's today, 7th of June.

So do you think that this is gonna be it?

Well, you don't know. You never know.

You don't know who's walking through that door. Oh. I'm joking.

THEY LAUGH He's rearing!

My brother's called Green. Stop lying.

No, he fully is, yeah. No, he's not. Yeah.

Is he actually? No, he's not.

HE LAUGHS

I'm so glad. I actually am.

Yeah, no, you're in...

I like what you're saying, I like what you're giving me.

I'm picking up what you're putting down.

OK. Have you heard that saying? Nah?

No. You're picking up what...

What are you picking up and what are we are dropping off?

Yeah, I'm picking up what you're putting down.

Have you really not heard that?

I'm picking up what you're putting down?

No!

Don't worry, Harry, I'll pick up what you're putting down,

with rubber gloves.

As all superfans know, the dressing room is the girls' inner sanctum -

a place where they can have deep and meaningful chats away from the boys.

And here is an exclusive unseen clip

of Megan getting something off her chest.

BELCHES SQUEAKY VOICE: Excuse me.

I were proper shocked that he stood up,

because he just acts so nonchalant. Like, he doesn't give a fuck.

Yeah? He's Welsh.

MEGAN BELCHES SQUEAKY VOICE: Excuse me.

Right, girls.

BELCHES SQUEAKY VOICE: Excuse me.

MEGAN BELCHES REGULAR VOICE: Excuse me.

Right, this is out of our hands.

The more that we keep stressing, the more it's gonna heighten...

I'm gonna belch again. It's a nervous one this time.

BELCHES Sorry.

BELCHES Excuse me.

I've been a belchy gal today. It's the nerves.

Thank you, Megan, for your contribution.

Deep but not so meaningful.

Rule one of a first date -

be cool and try not to put your foot in it.

Or your backside, for that matter.

Oh, it's soaking wet. Ugh! Oh, no!

SHE LAUGHS No!

Why is it wet? Have we got wet bums now?

Fuck's sake, yeah.

No, you actually can see it, Harry. Can you see it?

Not that I mean to stare at your arse or anything.

Shall we sit somewhere else? Yeah.

Come on, let's have a little look. Sorry, guys, my bad.

I got carried away drinking out of my new water bottle,

and I got caught short on the way to the voice-over booth.

Oh, yeah. Oh, that is well nice, man. That's so cute.

It's all well and good being in here,

and it's all fun and games and that, but... Is this wet as well?

Is it? Here, sit on this pillow.

Yeah. It feels a bit wet.

I don't know. Come here. Sorry.

But, yeah, it's all fun and games in here, but when we come out,

I live in North London, you're in Dublin. How do you feel about that?

I don't live in Dublin. I told you that. Where do you live?

Brighton. And you went, "Love Brighton."

Oh, yeah, sorry, sorry. Yeah, I know.

I'm not listening, am I? You're not, you're not.

What's your day job? Have you told me already? Yeah.

Oh, no, this is not gonna work. You're bad at this!

Oh, no, my memory. Oh, OK, what is it? Go on.

No. Guess, guess.

You told me? I told you, so guess.

You're about to remind me. I'm an energy broker.

Energy... Come on, now. Oh, yeah.

"Come on, now." I told you.

I don't even know what an energy broker is.

It's selling people energy contracts on the phone.

You're a sales... You're the people I hang up on.

Yeah. Yeah! No way. Oh, my God.

I might have to save your number next time you ring with it.

Actually, can I get the number, too?

I'm thinking of switching the villa's energy provider.

These festoons are costing me a fortune.

Ooh! Anyone got a torch on their phone?

THEME FROM DOCTOR WHO PLAYS

I'm not sure if you all know,

but it's been ten years since Love Island hit our screen.

And over that time, it has regenerated and evolved.

We've hosted a galaxy of out-of-this-world characters.

Me and Hannah are officially together now,

girlfriend and boyfriend.

We also witnessed extreme flirting

that's had us all hiding behind the sofa...

I think we could have a laugh.

..as well as raunchy romances.

To paraphrase the Daleks...

Fornicate, fornicate.

There have been some difficult decisions...

Are you gonna speak to Harley today? Like, about the re-coupling?

I don't know.

..Earth-shattering showdowns...

I don't mean it like that.

A bit shit, innit?

..and classic love language.

And, most importantly, raspberries.

Oh, yeah, because they're cute and hairy.

SHE SQUEAKS

But through that time, there has been one Love Island staple

that has been on the lips of all the Islanders.

Having just undergone its fourth regeneration,

it's bigger on the inside and designed to ensure our Islanders...

Rehydrate, rehydrate.

I give you the Love Island water bottle.

Hey, Dejon, you're a personal trainer, aren't you?

I've just joined a new gym,

and my personal trainer is making me do burpees.

So, go on, tell me, how many burpees can you do?

DEJON CHUCKLES

Erm, burpees? How many burpees I can do?

Hold that thought. It's time for a break.

# Euphoria... #

Do you know what I was thinking?

All these chats here, which are, like, not really part of the day,

I think these are the things that get mashed up on the Unseen Bits.

You're not wrong, Tommy.

So let's get mashing. It's Love Island Unseen Bits.

Welcome back to our little old love shack.

We are the show that gets you even closer to the action.

Oh, God, that's right in our face. LAUGHS

Had to zoom right in!

Health and Safety, look away now as we love an accident.

GASPING, LAUGHTER

Oh, no! That was you. That wasn't me.

No, that wasn't... That was not me. You just... You distracted me.

We don't believe in safety nets, or those weird net pants

that sew into the inside of swimming shorts.

TRIMMER BUZZES Cut the net?

Cut the net. So uncomfortable.

Just let it hang loose.

And we're not afraid of a close shave.

I need to shave my minge.

I'm not even being funny. Mine grows, like, at rapid speed.

So, let's ease you in.

# Oh, euphoria... #

Is this a DMC? What's that?

Deep, meaningful chat. Nah.

Of course not, Shakira. It's Unseen Bits!

So, before the break, personal trainer Dejon

was gonna tell us how many burpees he could do.

I've managed three during the break.

How many can you do, Dejon? LAUGHS

Erm, burpees? How many burpees I can do?

A lot of burpees. Maybe 100 unbroken.

100? You're joking. No, no joke.

100? One and zero-zero? Yeah, of course.

Unbroken? Straight? Of course.

No stopping? Of course I can do 100 unbroken.

That is impressive,

but I think I know someone in the villa

who can beat you at burpees.

BELCHES SQUEAKY VOICE: Excuse me!

I know we don't do politics on this show,

but this next unseen clip gets a bit hairy.

FARTS, THEY LAUGH

You need to get your arse checked.

FARTS AGAIN Oh, fucking hell!

On the first night, Maya returned, but just really slowly.

Hurry up, Maya!

But once in, she had a first-night twist for our Islanders.

Please welcome Toni.

Is that a boy or a girl?

Wait, Toni, is that not a boy's name? Toni, yeah.

It's a girl's name as well, I think.

Toni's both names. It can be a girl or a boy.

# Hello?

# I'm here

# Get ready, ready, ready, ready

# A hot new Bombshell Enters the villa... #

Hi, everyone. What do you say, everyone?

Hi!

And Toni chose Ben to couple up with,

leaving Shakira single.

I'm all right.

And here's an unseen clip of taxi driver Ben

getting to know transatlantic Toni.

I've always wanted to go Vegas. I can't believe you've never been.

I need my tour guide, that's why. I'm waiting for you. I'll take you.

Been waiting for a girl called Tori that lives in Vegas.

Toni. Oh.

# Dun-dun-duuun! # HE CHUCKLES

Ah, no, I called Toni Tori. THEY LAUGH

Really? Oh, my God! Yeah.

To remember her name, I have to remember my toe and my knees.

So, earlier, I was talking to her, and I said, "Knee,"

and I was like, oh... You was like, "Shin? Toe?"

THEY LAUGH Don't worry, boys,

as I've put all the names of everyone on the beds

to help you out.

How do you say her name, though? Ah-lee-nah?

Ah-lee-nah? Al-ee-mah?

No, it's "mah". "Mah"? I thought it was...

Well, that looks like a N on there. It's an M.

That looks like an M and a N. It's Alimna, but the N is silent.

Alima. No, there's no N. It's just...

Yes, there is, bro. Can't you see it?

No, that's what I thought, it was A-L-M... Well, it was...

A-L-M? What about the I? Oh, yeah!

THEY LAUGH

Who's Helena with? Helena? Which one's that?

Right, I keep on getting mixed up. Helena's the blonde.

Right, OK. Leggy blonde that looks like a supermodel.

So, Helina... No.

Oh, this is so hard. Helina? Hel... Alima. Alima and Helena.

Alima and Helena. Yeah.

Helena's the blonde one. Yeah.

Come on, Ben, the other boys know all the names.

I also find Harriet and Meg attractive.

Harriet?! Which one's Harriet?

Mate, remind me her name again. I completely forgot.

Who? Blondie. Helena.

Fucking hell! Oh, my God!

OK, try again. Hel-EN-a.

I find Meg and Harriet attractive.

Oh, I give up.

At least the girls are good with names.

I think your name is Harry.

They went, "She introduced herself as Harriet earlier."

I fucking didn't!

I reckon we should just call you H, Helena.

That's sexy, H. Just cos you can't pronounce it?

Yeah! THEY LAUGH

I've been doing good. Helena. No... No!

I've been saying it wrong still. Honestly, I'm so sorry.

It's all right, babe.

I will get to terms with it by... When we're all gone.

"I'll remember it when we're all moved out." Yeah!

The good news is that everyone could remember Sophie's name.

Go on, Maya, your turn.

Sophie, you are now single

and therefore dumped from the island.

Oh. Sorry. APPLAUSE

We all know that practice makes perfect.

And it in this unseen bit,

Blu and Conor are practising counting backwards.

Good luck, boys!

Three, two, one... OK, now... Three, two, one.

THEY LAUGH Three, two, one.

Three, two, one. THEY LAUGH

What's going on there? I don't know what's going on there.

I'm lost. I'm lost. I'm lost.

Right, three, two, one... Hey!

So now you have to start,

and you've the choice of the next three.

So you only do two now. OK? Three, two, one.

What are you doing? Don't, mate.

No idea, mate. THEY LAUGH

Three, two, one.

Three, two, one.

Three, two, one. Three, two, one.

I don't know what's going on, mate. I don't get it. No, me neither.

Three, two, one. Three, two, one.

THEY LAUGH

Three, two, one. Nice.

Ben and Harry were supposed to be

the next ones to have a go,

but they were still getting the hang of counting backwards.

Give it a couple of weeks, lads. You'll get it.

It's like this - three, two, nine...

Oh, it's harder than it seems!

Over on the sun deck, the boys are pondering whether or not

Conor and Helena's relationship will go the whole ten yards,

or the whole 9.144 metres if you prefer the metric system.

Is she your type, Conor?

Er, no, not really, like, but... Yeah.

She isn't a million miles away from it either, like. Yeah, yeah.

She's probably, like, 60 miles away. Yeah, yeah.

That's brilliant. THEY LAUGH

He said, not a million miles away, just, like, 60 miles away.

That's how we should say it. That's how we should say it, like.

Talking... Rating how much someone is your type. Oh, yeah, yeah.

You know what I mean? With Megan, with you.

She's like... She... She's within a mile.

She's like... you got there yesterday.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whereas, like, with me and Helena...

How many miles? She's probably about 15 miles away

She's very close. 15 miles is long enough as well,

though, because... Do you use kilometres...?

No, you use miles in the UK, do you? Yeah.

Yeah, I use kilometres, so... Really?

Yeah. You use kilometres?

Oh, you grew up in Spain, innit? Yeah. I use miles.

Do you use "kg"? Yeah. Do you?

Yeah. I'm so annoying when it goes...

Pounds. Pounds is so annoying.

When you go to the gym and it's pounds, it's like, "Oh, really?"

Just over double, innit? Yeah. It's just, like... long.

Everything feels heavier in pounds, I don't know.

Well, obviously, it's just over double, innit?

But, like, you know, like, a 45lb plate

is supposed to be a 20kg plate,

but a 100kg bench versus a 225lb bench...

225 feels way heavier.

Sorry, Tommy, I've checked with the experts,

and the weight is exactly the same.

If it feels heavier,

you may need to ask your gym to turn down the gravity.

Over to the Love Island kitchen, where we cater for

the lactose intolerant and the lactose-ignorant.

Does anybody have any milk preference?

This one.

No, that's egg whites. What?

That's egg whites, innit? Yeah.

Not egg whites, soya milk.

No, that's soya milk. What'd you mean, it's egg whites?

Well, that's got eggs on it. What?

Sorry, Ben. Is that not eggs?

That's chickpeas or something. Eggs aren't that small.

That is eggs. That's eggs.

Let me look. Let me look. Go on.

That says "soja" as well.

I am bi-linguini. So, that's chickpeas, mate.

Chickpeas, isn't it? That's not egg whites.

I might have a bowl of that. Have you put milk on them already?

Yeah. Do you want the egg whites?

No, I don't want the egg whites.

Smells a bit weird, but it's definitely milk.

I'm not trying that. No, smell it.

That smells like milk.

Yeah, where's mine?

Right, I hate to break up the party,

but can we move this conversation on, please?

I feel like we've "milked" it for all its worth.

Ooh, get Harry.

He's managed to surround himself with four girls on the daybeds.

What is it about him they find so attractive?

Is it his mullet, his cheeky smile?

I think it's cos I got my black toe out again.

Your black...? I think it's that.

Right, you've just icked me the fuck out. Put it away.

Stop, I'm not trying it on with you...

Can I ask what the story is behind the black toe?

It just happens every year through football.

But, hun, I don't believe that football excuse. That's bullshit.

What do you mean? It's not a football excuse.

Let your toes breathe.

Your football boots must be too small for you.

No, but it's people, like, standing on my toes.

Like, it's two of them. Right.

You wanna have a look, don't you? No! Ugh, I'll be sick.

You want to suck on them, don't you? Ugh!

I don't think I could let anyone do that.

Ugh! It's making me feel sick already.

It's fallen off, that's what usually happens, and then it grows back,

and then it will fall off again next year.

It will fall off again next year? Yeah, yeah, falls off every season.

An annual thing. It's like an annual shedding.

It's like Christmas.

Yeah, this is grown in black already, this year.

It's like a leap year.

THEY LAUGH

It's incredible.

Go to the podiatrist. I think I will.

I think, in future,

all Harry's unseen bits should stay unseen.

Hey, Tommy, before the break,

have you got any juicy secrets to tell us?

I think a secret that not a lot of people know about me,

which is probably the first time I've ever mentioned it,

so it might come as a shock to my friends as well...

What is it? Ah, no! We've not got time.

You'll have to come back and find out what it is.

They've gotta do what they've gotta do, haven't they?

TEXT ALERT, GASPING

Is that me? Oh, God!

Say it, say it, say it. It's just an update.

THEY LAUGH

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

Yes, an update that it's part three

of Love Island Unseen Bits.

Cos I live for this I live for this...

How we feeling, girls?

We are strong, we are beautiful, we are slay.

What about you, boys? All ready?

# Feeling like the one this year

# Lookin' like the man When I look in the mirror... #

Nice, boys.

Great, as we have our fingers on the pulse with more un-aired gems.

Guys, do you wanna see something? Look how small my pinky finger is.

Let me see.

It is quite small, actually. That is really small.

Let's see. It's four centimetres.

Is it? Oh, my God.

That's my party trick!

We've got this unseen bit nailed.

How do you type and stuff, like, when...?

I don't type.

On your phone. Oh.

Oh, like... HE CLANKS BOTTLE

Yeah.

Can you not get the toenails like that as well?

You could if you really wanted to, but that's kind of gross, you know?

So, come on, everyone, let's get moving.

You can... cut some shapes in these.

# I live for this

# Ain't nothing I won't give for this... #

HELENA EXCLAIMS, LAUGHS

Babe, are you OK?

The amount that I've tripped over this fucking gaff.

Before the break, Tommy was about to reveal a big secret.

So, go on, then, Tommy. What is it?

I think a secret that not a lot of people know about me,

that I do show a bit of emotion.

So when did you last cry, Tommy?

Oh, God. The last time I cried, erm...

it was probably the Gavin And Stacey...

HE LAUGHS

..the Gavin And Stacey special on Christmas Day.

That moment when Mick stood up, at the, er, church,

at Smithy's wedding.

Oh, my God, I was in pieces.

I'm welling up myself now.

Quick! Play a clip to distract me.

After ten years of Love Island,

all of these beautiful people look the same to me.

But maybe that's just a Scottish thing.

What do you think, Alima?

Does he not remind you of Tom Clare a wee bit?

Yeah, he really does look like Tom Clare. Yes.

I've heard that before.

But I don't know how I feel about it, really.

Why? He's good-looking, so take it as a compliment.

I get Tom Clare every day of my life.

It's not doing me a disservice, he's a great-looking lad,

but I think I might have a bit more than him.

Don't know, it could be... it could be worse comparisons.

Mm-hm. True.

I used to get called the Grinch at school.

HELENA SPLUTTERS I swear to you, right.

When I was, like, maybe, like 12, this girl...

HELENA LAUGHS No, I'm laughing cos I can see it.

I can see it as well, low-key.

Fuck off! I can fucking see it!

'People used to call me the Grinch at school.'

Well, this one girl did, and then it caught on for like a month.

People used to say I look like Cindy Lou. I know.

Oh, my... That's a better shout.

That's a better shout. From Whoville.

I tell you who looks like a celebrity.

Dejon, Ivan Toney.

He is a dead ringer, mate.

Harry said he thinks I look like Ivan Toney.

So, yeah, Ivan Toney is a lucky man.

# Wow... # HE LAUGHS

Our lovely Megan, hello, Irish Mila Kunis.

Thanks, guys. Stop!

I think Shakira looks a bit like Pocahontas.

I'll take it, I'll take it.

Oh, we have said that Helena looks a bit

like Megan Barton-Hanson from Love Island.

She's giving that energy.

I will tell her now when I see her cos I've not told her that yet.

I keep calling Blu Ron from the other Love Island series.

Do you reckon? HE LAUGHS

I don't think no-one's told me I look like anyone yet.

Right, I have had no lookalikes yet, so...

Right, I know exactly who you look like. Who?

Do you remember Sophia Grace and Rosie?

Used to go on The Ellen Show? And they'd sing...

# Boom, badoom, boom Boom, badoom, boom... #

Who do I look like?

Rosie, the blonde one, grown up. You look like her.

Really? Yeah.

No. I'm just Megan Moore.

I've been told I look like Brad Pitt in certain light,

and that light is pitch darkness.

The kitchen is the place

where our Islanders like to debate all the big questions, like...

I don't know whether I'm a fried egg or poached.

Do we have any avocado? I know, I'm dying for it.

Is there not any in there? I didn't even check.

There's some big bugs out here, man.

Meg, watch out.

It's...

IAIN GROANS

That's a drone. He's in the fridge! He's in the fridge!

On my life... SCREAMING

..that's the biggest thing I have seen.

That's a bird.

THEY LAUGH

What's on that? What is that? Is that a bee? What is that?

Ooh! That needs to move away from me, whatever that is.

Turn your head. Oh! It'll go, it'll go. No!

Stay still, stay still.

You look like a flower in that blue bikini.

What the fuck? Hm!

He is, like, watching you from an end,

but chatting up girls...

Ugh!

I dunno, I feel like...

When I was chatting to Harry yesterday... Fuck off!

I know. It's gone.

What is that?! What is that?

SQUEAKS

Wait, wait.

Oh, I love a happy ending.

Thanks, Shakira. Just drop me off there.

I'll give you five stars and a tip. GUFFAWS

It's normally around about week three

that the Islanders start doing

their hilarious Iain Stirling impressions,

but this lot got started early.

A new Bombshell enters da villa!

A new Bombshell enters the villa!

A new Bombshell enters the villa!

A new Bombshell ENTERS the villa!

You sound like him.

A new Bombshell... enters the villa!

Iain should be frothing right now.

I think he should use our voices then his voice-over.

I'm not worried one bit, girls. You've got it all wrong! Look!

# Hello? I'm here

# Get ready, ready, ready, ready

# A hot new Bombshell Enters the villa. #

No, wait, stop! Even the song's got it wrong.

ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS This is how you do it.

Two new Bombshells enter the villa!

# It's me and you An army of two... #

Come on, guys, can you not count?

It's Remell, and he's got Shea in tow.

And talking of toes, there's something you really need to know

before dipping your tootsies into villa life.

Are you gonna get your toes out?

None of the boys have got toenails, or they're black.

My toenails are wrote off. THEY LAUGH

Here y'are! Get on the end of that. Whoa! Oh, shit.

So, how are your toenails?

You're gonna have to wait and see when we're by the pool or something.

Welcome to the villa, boys. THEY LAUGH

Yeah, welcome to the villa, boys.

Just remember to make sure you "toe" the line.

After his late night in the Hideaway,

Harry was absolutely exhausted.

He was starving as Helena sapped him of all his energy.

And as a result, he was feeling a little weak.

Some might say Wimpy.

Oh, where's my burger?

Oi, have you eaten my burger?

Geez, you've eaten my burger, I know you have.

You ate it. I haven't eaten it, I know you've eaten it.

Good question, Dejon. Who ate it?

To find out, we're launching a special investigation

to uncover the identity of the breakfast burger burglar.

Whoever committed this crime will be doing porridge for a long time.

First under the spotlight,

well, the light from the fridge, was Tommy.

Could he be the patty pilferer?

No. He's gone for a good, honest yoghurt and fruit.

Blu goes in to get a drink.

Stealing Shakira from Harry is one thing,

but would he stoop so low as to nick another man's burger?

Next on the scene of the crime, Dejon just grabs some ice

and Remell just checks out the cold cuts.

Next under suspicion is Toni.

Americans love burgers for breakfast, don't they?

I bet it's her!

Oh, sorry, Toni. Just coffee and milk.

Hang on, what's this? Blu's come back!

Bang to rights.

Bold as brass, Blu, the little bugger.

He's a breakfast burger burglar.

Geez, you've eaten my burger, I know you have.

You ate it. I haven't eaten it, I know you've eaten it.

I saw Blu eating a burger this morning. Fuck off!

He nicks your bird and your burger. THEY LAUGH

I did as well.

Oi, did you eat the burger this morning? Yeah.

THEY LAUGH

Oh, my God!

The biggest crime of all

is having a burger for breakfast at all.

Have some muesli, guys,

you'll be less likely to get bunged up.

# Open up your love I'm coming if you want me to

# Open up your love

# Your heart's Big enough for two... #

Hey, how am I looking? Look at the baby oil.

Where's the oil? You got oiled up? Oiled up, let's go!

Let's go indeed. We're all oiled up

and ready to slide our way into the final part of the show.

Welcome back to Love Island Unseen Bits.

# Open up your love... #

And it's not just the oily boys

that need to avoid an unfortunate slip.

If I slip a nipple, let me know, will you?

GIGGLING

So sit back on the sofa, but be careful...

LAUGHTER

..because we have some banging clips still to come.

SLAPPING, LAUGHTER

Come on, strike a pose!

And check, check, check, check, check it out.

DEJON BEATBOXES OK.

Man like Tommy He ain't gotta wear a johnny

Why? Cos he got a little money Hey!

Hey, Blu. Has he got a clue? Yes, he do. Cos...

He might have to go to the loo. Ohh!

Here's an unseen clip of the girls in the dressing room,

and it sounds like they are talking a load of Botox.

What do you have, Toni, just your lips?

Yeah, just my lips, but I haven't gone in years. Yeah.

The lady that did my lips was in Miami,

and now she moved to the Dominican Republic

and does lips and penis injections. GASPING

What? What do you mean, penis injections?

I swear to God, you can get filler in your dick.

You can get filler in your willy? Uh-huh. Fuck off!

What...? What's the filler in the willy for?

Well, what do you think it's fucking for?

But then it shrivels up when it's wet?

THEY LAUGH How would it go soft? Yeah.

Asking for a friend, but what's that treatment you mentioned?

Is it called "Bo-cocks"?

And if you thought you'd heard the last of Ben's rapping, think again.

Who does he think he is, "Beninem"?

"Ice Cab"?

"MC Uber"?

No, no, no. Obviously, my name's Ben.

I might write with a pen. Go on, go on, go on.

I might count to ten.

What? Cos I got a friend called Glenn and a uncle called Ken.

Might have a friend called Len. What, cos my name's Ben, what?

I like "woman" not men. Oh. LAUGHS

I used to have a girlfriend Called Bren, hey, hey, hey!

Did you? No.

THEY LAUGH Cos I just go with the flow.

You know me, I'm not slow cos I stubbed my toe.

It's Ben and Co. Cos I keep it on the low.

Only here, I've got a mo. On the boat, I might row.

I'm here to show I've got friends, not foe.

Boy better know. Hey! Oh, yeah!

See? I actually reckon rapping's my thing.

I reckon this is what it was all about.

Yeah, spawned a rapping career.

I wish that unseen clip had remained unheard, too.

As we saw, the re-coupling at the end of the week

was as tense as ever,

with some long dramatic pauses and epic sweeping shots

of the villa building the atmosphere.

The ball was in the girls' court as they got to choose.

Alima chose new boy Remell,

Shakira re-coupled with Ben,

Megan stayed with Tommy,

leaving us with five single boys,

and Helena with a big decision to make.

Me and this boy bounce off of each other's energy quite a lot.

The past couple of days, I think, went from 0 to 100 quite quick.

We both took quite a big risk.

But what was that big risk Helena was talking about?

Was it their outrageous flirting in the Hideaway?

Yeah, you're... HE LAUGHS

Was it Harry's pseudo-celebrity status?

No, Tommy, sorry, Tom Clare, a wee bit.

Yeah, he really does look like Tom Clare. Yeah!

Or was she dreaming of Harry's flowery trousers?

They're pretty risky.

I dunno what these are, bro, but these could be me, mate.

Let me see them, bro. Moody, aren't they?

They look like my dad's trousers. I think these are me, you know?

Yeah, that's real, innit? Yeah, big time.

Bro said, "Big time." I love your fashion sense.

Don't look. Close your eyes.

Close your eyes, close your eyes, close your eyes, close your eyes...

Oh, my God, what is Harry wearing?!

SHE SCREAMS

D'you know, like, curtains? That's what he's got.

Where is he? He's got, like, flowery trousers.

Helena's gonna die.

She looks so fit, and he's wearing that!

This is cool. The trousers, wear them,

but just wear, like, a blue or a green top, please, plain.

You can wear that. No, I think that's...

I'm not changing. You can say what you like.

But thank you for your input. She might not pick you.

Harry. APPLAUSE

Yes, it was Harry's flowery trousers

that proved lucky in the end. APPLAUSE

And someone else who was wearing a lucky colour was Blu, of course.

What's up, then, Maya, you all right?

What's happening?

Blue name, blue shorts, blue trainers.

Blu by name, blue by nature.

If we go all the way back to day one,

it worked out for him then.

But it couldn't save him from being dumped.

Bye!

At least he's wearing blue.

He come in in blue. He did, didn't he?

Poetic, that.

Pure poetry in motion.

As Blu in blue felt a little blue

when he knew it was time to say toodle-oo.

Toodle-oo, Blu.

It's back, and as the saying goes,

if it's not broke, don't try to fix it.

It's time for...

This time, I asked the Islanders to give us their best chat-up lines.

I've never had to use a chat-up line to a boy,

they sort of come to me if I'm looking all right on the night.

From now on, you can call me coffee,

cos I'm trying to keep you up all night.

My new favourite one is, "You want to go halves on a baby?"

Simple, sweet and cheeky. SHE LAUGHS

They've never worked for me,

but I'm gonna keep trying and use them until they do work.

They've definitely worked before, sometimes.

Depends if you're fit.

Four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

The only number I don't see here is yours.

Oh, that's a good one.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see.

Tennessee, you're ten I see... Are you from Tenne...

You just go up and say, "That dress looks good,

"it would look better on my bedroom floor."

SHE GAGS Get away. No, thank you.

If it's on DM, I have used this one before, where you go,

"Oh, I think someone's impersonating you."

They always panic and they're like, "What, what, what, what?"

And then you send them the NASA Instagram account

because they're out of this world. SHE LAUGHS

CLEARS HER THROAT Are you guys ready?

Is your dad a boxer?

Because you are a knockout. Did that land?

Why are you not laughing?

Why are you not laughing?!

Do you fancy a raisin?

No? How about a date?

I don't think anyone's saying no to that, I'll be honest.

I bet Tommy has got some chat-up lines.

I'm not an electrician, but I can certainly lighten up your day.

Are you a parking ticket?

You've got fine written all over you.

Hang on, let me remember how it goes.

Yeah, it's, you're 70% water, and I'm thirsty.

HE LAUGHS

What?!

I'm not a photographer, but I can picture you and I together.

Aw!

I'm not even playing cards, but I've pulled a queen.

Yeah, I like that one.

The worst chat-up line, and the most frequent one,

especially on dating apps, is, is your name Shakira?

Cos your hips don't lie.

SHE SCREAMS

So annoying. Don't do that again.

You're done.

Come back next time for some more...

It was shocking, it caused drama,

there was a massive twist involving the ginormous telly

hanging over the swimming pool.

Come on. Girls! Girls' night. CHEERING

Fuck off. What?

Here's an exclusive unseen bit of what they got to watch.

MEGAN BELCHES SQUEAKY VOICE: Excuse me!

Fuck off! Wait, shh!

Is that not eggs? Looks like chickpeas or something.

Eggs? Eggs aren't that small. That is eggs.

That's eggs? What?!

Look how small my pinky finger is. It is quite small, actually.

Oh, my God. That's really small.

It's 4cm. Is it?

Aw! He's well-behaved.

You... HE LAUGHS

We'll leave the girls watching some classic TV.

See you all next time for more Unseen Bits! Bye!

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