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1
00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:30,720
'If I get promoted to loan supervisor
that's an extra 160 a month.'
2
00:00:30,720 --> 00:00:34,600
'Four months – weekend in Zurich!
If I get it.'
3
00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:37,800
'Why didn't I iron my fucking tie?'
4
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:43,480
Hey, Mark!
I thought you'd be out by now.
5
00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:43,480
Nope. Not yet. Haven't been in yet.
6
00:00:43,680 --> 00:00:48,760
'Lovely soft face.'
7
00:00:44,880 --> 00:00:48,760
It's just Barbara and Lucy.
Have a bloody good laugh.
8
00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:53,160
You're right. Totally right.
A laugh. Have a nice laugh.
9
00:00:54,400 --> 00:01:00,960
D'you think Jeff's
charity squash stuff counts for much?
10
00:00:57,400 --> 00:01:00,960
Don't worry. I'm sure you'll get it.
11
00:01:02,360 --> 00:01:04,360
''
12
00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:07,360
Sophie, have you ever been to Zurich?
13
00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:10,160
What?
14
00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:10,160
'Too much. Too much!'
15
00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:16,200
Ruthlessly clean. Talking of which,
badminton – are you on for Wednesday?
16
00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:21,840
Yep, still on.
17
00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:21,840
And afterwards...
18
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:21,840
Hi, Sophie. Fuckface, you're on.
19
00:01:23,480 --> 00:01:29,480
'Forget it, mate. You're dead in the
water. I'll be relaxing all over you'
20
00:01:30,520 --> 00:01:35,320
Welcome to my world.
21
00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:35,320
Man, I'm so glad you got me in here.
22
00:01:35,520 --> 00:01:37,120
Nice.
23
00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:41,760
Wicked. So, let's go to the studio
and riff on some shit.
24
00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:47,720
Totally. Although one of us has to
be on reception, unless Hazel's in.
25
00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:51,280
< That's really important.
26
00:01:48,520 --> 00:01:51,280
OK, I get it – the code.
27
00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:53,560
We bide our time
28
00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:57,800
and pick the perfect moment
to shake shit up and get noticed.
29
00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:00,920
One of the best ways to get noticed
30
00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:05,560
is to pick up a four-pinter
on the way in and get Ron's latte...
31
00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:08,720
Jesus, you've got a Blair Witch ear!
32
00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:13,320
Oh, yeah, that's Toni's.
You know, next-door Toni?
33
00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:18,680
Oh, the one you wrote Toni's Theme for?
34
00:02:18,880 --> 00:02:24,680
She's like some kind of drug. Like
ketamine, but... with nicer hair.
35
00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:30,160
You're all set, ain't ya? You are
a music-studio reception runner now!
36
00:02:31,240 --> 00:02:37,840
Gets the women hot.
37
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:37,840
Yeah?
38
00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:37,840
Oh, yeah. It's a savage garden,
my friend, a savage garden.
39
00:02:39,320 --> 00:02:41,880
'Shall I ask what he means?'
40
00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:47,200
'The interview went well.
Glad I didn't mention the phones.'
41
00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:50,000
'Keep the big idea on ice for now.'
42
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:55,320
'Should have mentioned the blind kids
but it might seem I did it for my CV'
43
00:02:55,520 --> 00:03:02,040
'I did not do that just for my CV.'
44
00:02:57,360 --> 00:03:02,040
Mark?
45
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:02,040
Sophie!
46
00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:02,040
Barbara says there's news.
47
00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:07,720
They didn't give it to Jeff?!
48
00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:07,720
No, they didn't.
49
00:03:05,600 --> 00:03:07,720
YES!
50
00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:10,080
No. Mark, let me...
51
00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:12,320
Sit down. Erm...
52
00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:16,040
They didn't give it to Jeff
or to you.
53
00:03:16,040 --> 00:03:18,680
Is this... Is this a funny joke?
54
00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:22,680
No, Mark. Listen...
This is weird, really weird,
55
00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:27,680
but Barbara asked me to temporarily
take over the supervisor role!
56
00:03:27,680 --> 00:03:31,520
Well, good, that's good.
Great.
57
00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:37,280
I'll get on with these.
58
00:03:33,560 --> 00:03:37,280
Oh! Let me...
59
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:37,280
It doesn't matter! It doesn't matter!
60
00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:44,960
So, congratulations.
What the hell happened?
61
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:44,960
Barbara thought no-one came up
to the required standard, so...
62
00:03:44,960 --> 00:03:48,560
Sure. But what's the story
behind the story?
63
00:03:49,480 --> 00:03:54,320
Does there need to be a...?
64
00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:54,320
No! You know... how I think of you,
but...
65
00:03:54,440 --> 00:03:58,240
you've gotta say
I'm the better loan manager.
66
00:03:58,240 --> 00:04:05,520
Well...
67
00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:05,520
You've gotta say that.
68
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:05,520
You're good at your job.
69
00:04:03,280 --> 00:04:05,520
Thanks, boss
70
00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:08,240
Can you do the Hertfordshire file?
71
00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:12,960
Right.
72
00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:12,960
By tonight?
73
00:04:09,880 --> 00:04:12,960
You're serious?
74
00:04:10,920 --> 00:04:12,960
It's not a big...
75
00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:16,040
No, totally. That's fine. I'll do it.
76
00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:20,840
< Fine.
77
00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:20,840
'Dance a death-clog dance over me
78
00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:23,840
and leave a turd in my happy place..'
79
00:04:23,840 --> 00:04:27,000
'I should've milked
those blindies dry!'
80
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:30,280
Yeah, so this is very similar >
81
00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:35,720
to a larger version of the graphics
equaliser you'd have on your hi-fi,
82
00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:40,200
in that it takes the graphics,
which is another word for music,
83
00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:47,480
and it equalises them... >
84
00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:47,480
'I've lost her. Christ, I'm quite
boring when I put my mind to it.'
85
00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:53,640
And you've got the Chemical Brothers
in six?
86
00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:53,640
Yeah. They're great. Great group.
Lovely guys.
87
00:04:53,960 --> 00:05:00,600
'Come on. This is it.'
88
00:04:55,440 --> 00:05:00,600
So... just sitting here, it's like
you can feel your mojo expanding...
89
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:04,800
Jezz, have you seen my book?
90
00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:04,800
No, I don't think it's...
91
00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:11,520
Oh, hi!
92
00:05:05,800 --> 00:05:11,520
Hi! Is that Burroughs And
The Drug Culture? I love that book!
93
00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:17,320
Me too! I'm on the bit where Kerouac
finishes his Benzedrine high,
94
00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:21,760
looks at his novel and realises
he wasn't even holding a pen!
95
00:05:21,960 --> 00:05:26,760
Course, Ginsberg's in the corner,
laughing... but crying as well.
96
00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:31,320
Yeah, yeah!
97
00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:31,320
'GreatThey've clicked.
I hear clicking.'
98
00:05:31,320 --> 00:05:33,800
It shits on Birdsong.
99
00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:38,080
Jezz, could you have a look
at that thing on reception?
100
00:05:38,280 --> 00:05:41,840
Thing?
101
00:05:38,840 --> 00:05:41,840
Yeah.
102
00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:41,840
Oh, that. I fixed that.
103
00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:45,080
Oh, did you? Well, it's gone again.
104
00:05:45,280 --> 00:05:47,680
No, I fixed it. Twice.
105
00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:51,680
I was just down there.
It's not working.
106
00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:58,040
'Fuck off!'
107
00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:58,040
What isn't?
108
00:05:54,160 --> 00:05:58,040
The thing... you fixed.
109
00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:58,040
I'm just showing...
110
00:05:58,160 --> 00:06:02,120
I'm fine.
Your thing sounds... important.
111
00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:06,040
Maybe, erm...
112
00:06:03,640 --> 00:06:06,040
Hans. Super Hans.
113
00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:15,720
..Super Hans could show me
the rest of the equipment.
114
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:15,720
'It's cool. There's a bond of trust.
He won't break the bond of trust.'
115
00:06:22,280 --> 00:06:28,680
Ouch!
116
00:06:23,560 --> 00:06:28,680
Sorry.
117
00:06:24,760 --> 00:06:28,680
'Yeah, you'll be sorry. Bitch!
What a horrible...'
118
00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:34,680
'I couldn't hate her. Oh, why didn't
I tell them the phones thing?!'
119
00:06:36,280 --> 00:06:39,880
'Sophie climbing over my dead body
to...'
120
00:06:39,880 --> 00:06:43,760
'It's not her fault.
She's just a stooge.'
121
00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:48,400
'A beautiful, stupid, ugly, shitting,
filthy, grasping stooge.'
122
00:06:48,520 --> 00:06:53,680
Whoops!
123
00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:53,680
Ha!
124
00:06:50,960 --> 00:06:53,680
'Mark, don't let this ruin things.'
125
00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:59,800
'Once you're going out, put her bag
in the fridge and tell her she's mad'
126
00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:05,400
What's funny?
127
00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:05,400
Nothing. Sorry. Good shot.
128
00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:11,440
'It's just a game, a grown-up game.
Mousetrap. Downfall. Hunt the Ripper'
129
00:07:11,440 --> 00:07:15,200
'Why didn't I mention
the fucking phone?!'
130
00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:18,520
Phew! 15-9.
131
00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:24,360
Shall we call it a day?
132
00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:24,360
What?
133
00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:24,360
Sorry, I've been invited to dinner.
134
00:07:24,360 --> 00:07:32,360
I thought we were going for dinner!
135
00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:32,360
We never said...
136
00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:32,360
I thought we said.
137
00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:32,360
No... The whole team's going, and...
138
00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:34,440
The whole team. The team.
139
00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:43,400
Sorry, Mark, but I thought you...
140
00:07:36,440 --> 00:07:43,400
That's fine.
141
00:07:37,880 --> 00:07:43,400
'It's all fine. Everything is clear
I love her. She is going to kill me.'
142
00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:46,200
It's all... totally fine.
143
00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:52,160
'She's my guest. Why should I be
the one making Ron lattes all day?'
144
00:07:53,520 --> 00:07:57,760
Jezz! Just, er, showing Toni
the ol' drum loop from Bombdog.
145
00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:02,360
'She'll get bored of him,
like she got bored of me.'
146
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:12,080
You sure you can get home from here?
147
00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:12,080
Uh-huh.
148
00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:12,080
'You can never go home again.
Winter's coming. Is this Stalingrad?'
149
00:08:12,280 --> 00:08:16,080
'Is this where it all ends?
Or is this...
150
00:08:16,720 --> 00:08:21,560
..where it all starts? This is
a good idea! This is a great idea!'
151
00:08:21,760 --> 00:08:26,840
'It's exactly the sort of thing
they're looking for! Just do it!'
152
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:35,320
Alan, Mike, Barbara, can I butt in?
153
00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:35,320
Mark!
154
00:08:30,440 --> 00:08:35,320
Don't worry, I'm not going to
tuck in on expenses, but I thought
155
00:08:35,520 --> 00:08:43,600
I could share with you my vision...
156
00:08:37,440 --> 00:08:43,600
Mark!
157
00:08:38,360 --> 00:08:43,600
Can this wait till tomorrow?
158
00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:43,600
Can JLB's future wait? No!
159
00:08:43,720 --> 00:08:49,600
You'll agree when you hear the idea I
was too scared to spill at interview.
160
00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:53,360
Mate, I know you wanted...
161
00:08:51,080 --> 00:08:53,360
Reroute the phones!
162
00:08:53,360 --> 00:08:59,600
'This was definitely a good idea.'
163
00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:59,600
Reroute the phones
to everyone's mobiles!
164
00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:04,280
24-hour, round-the-clock,
customer-freaking service.
165
00:09:04,480 --> 00:09:09,200
It's "I'm clocking off –
finger to the customer." But now...
166
00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:12,000
Probably best if you go home now.
167
00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:16,080
But I've worked with blind kids!
I'm the full package!
168
00:09:16,080 --> 00:09:19,800
You'll have my action plan
in the morning!
169
00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:25,400
'This was a good idea. There's
no chance this wasn't a good idea.'
170
00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:35,200
Call yourself a mate, mate?
171
00:09:30,760 --> 00:09:35,200
What?
172
00:09:31,880 --> 00:09:35,200
I saw you leave her flat
this morning.
173
00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:42,920
She wanted bongo lessons.
She has a passion for percussion.
174
00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:42,920
She hasn't got a bongo.
You weren't carrying a bongo.
175
00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:49,800
You don't need a drum to teach...
176
00:09:44,560 --> 00:09:49,800
Look, mate, I'm next door. I heard
you... your noise last night.
177
00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:52,360
Oh, that. That was... press-ups.
178
00:09:52,560 --> 00:09:55,960
You seemed to enjoy the last few
a lot.
179
00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:58,680
Hey, you gotta push for the burn.
180
00:09:58,680 --> 00:10:02,920
'Huh! Uh-oh. It's the human
time bomb. Don't rile him.'
181
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:08,680
Hey, Jeremy.
182
00:10:03,880 --> 00:10:08,680
Hey, man! Join the party. We're just
hanging out with the band.
183
00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:11,360
Long day at the studio.
184
00:10:11,480 --> 00:10:19,720
So, how are you doing?
185
00:10:13,480 --> 00:10:19,720
Oh, good. I'm feeling pretty good.
186
00:10:15,480 --> 00:10:19,720
Great.
187
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:19,720
Barbara is an experienced man manager
188
00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:23,920
and if she thinks
Sophie's right for the job, fine.
189
00:10:26,360 --> 00:10:30,160
'Barbara, we should talk
re the phones thing.'
190
00:10:30,360 --> 00:10:35,360
'Oh, you're not here. I'll leave my
idea here so you can think about it.'
191
00:10:35,360 --> 00:10:40,480
'My new idea is urine. Loads and
loads of urine flooding your drawers'
192
00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:44,480
'What do you think about that?
Isn't that just the ticket?'
193
00:10:44,680 --> 00:10:48,040
'You're getting some too.'
194
00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:48,040
PHONE
195
00:10:48,040 --> 00:10:50,680
JLB Credit. Fuck off, please.
196
00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:54,840
'What? From Sophie?
Application letter to...?'
197
00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:57,400
'She did it. She stiffed me.'
198
00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:04,120
'Sophie's drawer gets a dousing too.
Or I could park a turd on her desk.'
199
00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:07,520
'Bit freaky.
But pissing's just horseplay.'
200
00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:11,600
'Oh, my God!
It's not my piss. It was a joke.'
201
00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:14,400
'She did it to me last week. Shit!'
202
00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:20,440
Mark?
203
00:11:15,680 --> 00:11:20,440
I didn't realise you were still here.
204
00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:20,440
I've been working late. You?
205
00:11:20,440 --> 00:11:25,440
Oh, just... likewise. Working late.
Left a file here somewhere.
206
00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:27,320
Right...
207
00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:32,800
I'm glad I bumped into you. About
the other night at the restaurant –
208
00:11:32,800 --> 00:11:37,080
I just wanted you to know...
209
00:11:34,680 --> 00:11:37,080
'Don't notice the piss.'
210
00:11:37,120 --> 00:11:40,440
Yeah, Mark?
211
00:11:38,040 --> 00:11:40,440
Oh, yeah. Totally.
212
00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:47,080
Oh, there's the Finnemore numbers.
213
00:11:43,040 --> 00:11:47,080
Let me get those for you.
214
00:11:44,680 --> 00:11:47,080
Oh! Thanks, Mark.
215
00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:53,400
Erm... listen, do you want to...
216
00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:53,400
Better not, thanks. Got a lot to do
Thanks.
217
00:11:54,320 --> 00:11:59,320
'I've got to take the letter-shaped
knife out of my back, Judas.'
218
00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:08,400
'So they're a bit crinkled. So what?'
219
00:12:08,560 --> 00:12:14,000
'Hello, police? Someone broke into
my office and crinkled my papers.'
220
00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:16,200
KNOCK ON DOOR
221
00:12:16,200 --> 00:12:21,080
Hello, Mark?
222
00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:21,080
Sophie?
223
00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:21,080
I'm coming in, if you're decent!
224
00:12:24,120 --> 00:12:26,640
What happened?
225
00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:26,640
It's not piss.
226
00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:33,760
So... I offer therapy
mixed in with careers guidance.
227
00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:37,960
But mainly you're
a careers guidance counsellor, right?
228
00:12:38,560 --> 00:12:42,880
I just want to make it clear
I'm here for careers guidance.
229
00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:45,480
Not therapy? OK...
230
00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:53,280
What are you trying to say?
231
00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:53,280
Just interested in why you feel...
232
00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:53,280
I don't want to talk about
any "difficult feelings",
233
00:12:53,360 --> 00:12:57,360
my mother, my father
or my so-called "childhood".
234
00:12:57,920 --> 00:13:00,000
Fine. Fine.
235
00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:05,120
Well, I like to start with
word association. It's a fun way...
236
00:13:05,320 --> 00:13:08,240
Is it therapy?
237
00:13:06,080 --> 00:13:08,240
Not really, no.
238
00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:12,800
I'll say a word and you tell me
what pops into your mind.
239
00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:18,400
'He's trying to therapise me.'
240
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:18,400
Let's start with an obvious one.
Work.
241
00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:25,080
'Snake pit.'
242
00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:25,080
Snake... charmer.
243
00:13:21,360 --> 00:13:25,080
Say the first thing
that comes to mind. Money.
244
00:13:25,080 --> 00:13:27,480
'Everything.'
245
00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:27,480
Not everything.
246
00:13:27,680 --> 00:13:30,840
Children.
247
00:13:28,360 --> 00:13:30,840
'Blind.'
248
00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:30,840
Er, short.
249
00:13:30,920 --> 00:13:33,200
Father.
250
00:13:31,320 --> 00:13:33,200
'Fuhrer.'
251
00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,200
Football.
252
00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:36,480
Mother.
253
00:13:33,680 --> 00:13:36,480
'Sophie.'
254
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:36,480
Fuck! No, not "fuck".
255
00:13:36,680 --> 00:13:41,320
Look, Mark, I get the feeling
you're resisting something here.
256
00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:45,520
Can I change any of those?
What score did I get?
257
00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:47,720
You don't get a score.
258
00:13:47,920 --> 00:13:54,240
Right. Sure you don't
259
00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:54,240
We should try something else.
Ever done a Rorschach test?
260
00:13:57,600 --> 00:14:02,840
Just tell me what you see.
261
00:13:58,840 --> 00:14:02,840
'A hairy twat.
A hungry, devouring twat.'
262
00:14:03,120 --> 00:14:05,200
A kitten?
263
00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:20,240
Off the hook
we need to hit something.
264
00:14:16,840 --> 00:14:20,240
'They don't know
I own a massive musical brain.'
265
00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:27,360
'To them,
I'm just the mild-mannered janitor.'
266
00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:27,360
The chorus is working.
267
00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:27,360
'Yeah, it is. Like the Frog Chorus!'
268
00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:33,360
'Someone needs to tell them. I'm
an outsider, but I'm on the inside.'
269
00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:38,600
'This is my moment. Go on, cross
the drawbridge. Make the splash.'
270
00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:43,480
Maybe you should just...
mess things up a bit.
271
00:14:44,080 --> 00:14:48,720
Sorry?
272
00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:48,720
Wouldn't it be better
if the sound was more...
273
00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:50,920
ker-jaow!
274
00:14:51,400 --> 00:14:55,800
Yeah... OK.
275
00:14:53,440 --> 00:14:55,800
Not so much A to B to C,
276
00:14:56,280 --> 00:15:00,160
but more sort of A to D
and then back to A
277
00:15:00,360 --> 00:15:02,520
and then to X!
278
00:15:02,760 --> 00:15:06,240
You know, just better,
like your first CD.
279
00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:10,240
Obviously, I don't wanna butt in.
It's your song.
280
00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:17,440
Cos, like I say,
at the moment it is very...
281
00:15:17,440 --> 00:15:23,080
We're doing... the... fucking song..
282
00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:33,440
Whereas it should be more
sort of .
283
00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:39,720
Whereas, like I say, at the moment
it is more kind of .
284
00:15:39,920 --> 00:15:42,560
Which it doesn't have to be.
285
00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:46,440
Yeah... No...
286
00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:49,880
Yeah, that's great. Thanks, mate.
287
00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:57,680
No problem, mate.
288
00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:57,680
'This was definitely a good idea.
There's no chance it wasn't.'
289
00:15:57,880 --> 00:16:03,280
Yeah, I can see that. I'll tell him.
All right, Mr T. Cheers, then.
290
00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:12,000
Sorry, mate, nothing I can do.
You're out.
291
00:16:07,360 --> 00:16:12,000
Fired? But...
292
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:12,000
I did everything I could.
293
00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:19,400
You didn't do shit!
294
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:19,400
Earlier. I had the whole thing out
with him. I threatened to walk.
295
00:16:19,600 --> 00:16:26,800
Right, so are you gonna walk now?
296
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:26,800
Steady on, mate, I'm not Spartacus.
297
00:16:24,320 --> 00:16:26,800
That's pretty obvious!
298
00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:29,000
Well, I refuse.
299
00:16:29,840 --> 00:16:33,040
I'm not going. So, whaddya do now?
300
00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:39,360
I'm still here, Super Hans.
You lose.
301
00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:46,040
Ron? No, he won't go.
302
00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:46,040
I see through you.
303
00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:46,040
He's still here.
304
00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:46,040
Muscling in on my woman...
305
00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:48,520
OK. I'll put you onto him. >
306
00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:58,240
OK, Ron. That won't be necessary,
because I'm going to leave now.
307
00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:00,520
Thank you, Ron.
308
00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:10,440
"..your entire life."
309
00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:10,440
Y'see, he's not Lennon,
but she is Yoko.
310
00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:14,600
I'm Lennon,
but Yoko's gone off with Paul.
311
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:18,480
Imagine that.
That's the scenario we're talking.
312
00:17:19,680 --> 00:17:27,200
Don't they mind you not going in?
313
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:27,200
They think I'm ill! I'm screwing the
system. There's nothing they can do.
314
00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:31,880
Sophie's gonna pay. Oh, she'll pay.
315
00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:36,840
Yeah. What's wrong with revenge and
the mark on the door and plagues?
316
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:43,080
Exactly.
317
00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:43,080
Suddenly you're not allowed revenge?
318
00:17:40,080 --> 00:17:43,080
It's political correctness gone mad.
319
00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:48,920
Jeremy, have you seen
Strangers On A Train?
320
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:51,840
Sure! "No-one suspects the chef!"
321
00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:58,480
It's about these two guys who
take care of each other's enemies.
322
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:58,480
OK! Right!
323
00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:06,640
And what happens in the end?
324
00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:06,640
Er, I can't remember. But I'm prett
sure it all turns out all right.
325
00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:08,640
"Happy painting."
326
00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:17,200
This is the ultimate!
327
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:17,200
Yes, sirree! It's payback time.
328
00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:20,160
She's paying back in fear dollars.
329
00:18:20,360 --> 00:18:27,600
What are you gonna say?
330
00:18:22,120 --> 00:18:27,600
I'll say I'm gonna cut her up
and leave her in buckets.
331
00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:27,600
What?! No! Don't say that!
332
00:18:27,600 --> 00:18:32,000
Jesus, that's horrible!
Just say something like...
333
00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:36,040
ask "Is Mrs Hugh Jass there?"
334
00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:38,840
No, she's got a thing about her bum.
335
00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:41,000
How about "Mike Hunt"? No, no.
336
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:45,960
Well, what, then?
337
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:45,960
Ooh. Hello?
Er... it's, erm... I'm...
338
00:18:46,320 --> 00:18:48,720
I'm watching you.
339
00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:52,600
Not in a horrible way.
Just... I can see you.
340
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:56,160
Yes, I can. You're eating spaghetti.
341
00:18:56,800 --> 00:18:59,000
Linguine. Whatever.
342
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:01,800
Well, I'm outside. >
343
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:04,760
I'm behind a bush.
344
00:19:04,960 --> 00:19:10,400
No, I'm not gonna tell you which..
Look, I'm the one in charge here.
345
00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:13,600
No, I'm just shitting you up a bit.
346
00:19:13,600 --> 00:19:16,960
Shit, she's got a fucking air gun!
347
00:19:15,160 --> 00:19:16,960
Sophie...
348
00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:22,760
Mark, she's going to...
349
00:19:17,960 --> 00:19:22,760
SHOTS
350
00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:22,760
Argh! Jesus, mother, bollocks,
that hurts!
351
00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:28,320
She's coming!
352
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:28,320
'Why not come clean?
You could say...'
353
00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:31,800
'Nope, there is no way
of making this look...'
354
00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:34,440
BARKS
355
00:19:32,360 --> 00:19:34,440
'Oh, fuck!'
356
00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:44,800
It's lucky you had those boots. >
357
00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:44,800
I suppose it turned out OK...
358
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:52,200
I think she got the message.
359
00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:52,200
'I've made a psycho call to the woman
I love. I've kicked a dog to death.
360
00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:56,000
'Now I'm going to pepper-spray
an acquaintance.'
361
00:19:56,000 --> 00:20:00,600
'What's happened to me?'
362
00:19:57,240 --> 00:20:00,600
So, you still up for this?
363
00:19:58,440 --> 00:20:00,600
Yeah. I'm on it.
364
00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:07,360
Great. Gimme the plan again.
365
00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:07,360
I give Super Hans the pizza,
pepper-spray him, then kick him
366
00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:12,720
and grab his wallet
to make it look like a robbery.
367
00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:12,720
That's the spirit.
368
00:20:13,360 --> 00:20:18,080
Go for it, buddy.
369
00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:18,080
'What am I doing? I can't do this!'
370
00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:21,200
'There's no way I can do this!'
371
00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:25,760
Do I look like
the kind of person who eats pizza?
372
00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:28,800
There's no pizza. It's me, Mark.
373
00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:33,200
I've been sent to pepper-spray
Super Hans and kick him,
374
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:35,920
but I can't! I can't, all right?
375
00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:42,360
It's gone over the edge of reason!
376
00:20:38,360 --> 00:20:42,360
Mark?
377
00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:42,360
It'd help if you'd start screaming.
378
00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:49,240
Screaming?
379
00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:49,240
And if you could tell Jeremy that I..
380
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:49,240
What's going on?
Why haven't you pepper-sprayed him?
381
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:53,800
Jezz? Is this for real?
382
00:20:51,320 --> 00:20:53,800
Er, I am not Jeremy. I am...
383
00:20:53,800 --> 00:20:58,440
Oh, lookee-lookee at this.
Well, what a very big surprise
384
00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:04,560
Another late-night bongo lesson
385
00:21:00,720 --> 00:21:04,560
We're two single people
having a great time.
386
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:11,440
If you can't handle that,
go back to the fifties.
387
00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:11,440
Yeah. Maybe you should make a move
mate.
388
00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:14,400
OK, mate, how about this for a move?
389
00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:20,240
Oh, fuck me!
390
00:21:17,360 --> 00:21:20,240
Jeremy, that's enough! No need to...
391
00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:26,360
God, you sprayed me!
You fucking sprayed me!
392
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,360
It's for your own good.
393
00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:33,960
OK, enough careers guidance.
394
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:36,840
I need therapy.
395
00:21:43,160 --> 00:21:47,920
How was it for my own good?!
396
00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:47,920
I don't want to talk about it.
397
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:52,920
You didn't kick him in the nuts –
that's something. Build on that.
398
00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:56,680
The spray's gone, Jeremy.
399
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:56,680
< Where is it?
400
00:21:57,400 --> 00:22:03,480
< Just tell me where it is.
401
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:03,480
Look, Mr Klugman has a mantra
that I'm finding helpful.
402
00:22:03,680 --> 00:22:05,920
< "Heal and grow."
403
00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:10,320
Not to be patronising,
but you should think about that.
404
00:22:10,320 --> 00:22:12,320
DOORBELL
405
00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:23,920
Sophie!
406
00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:23,920
'Heal and grow. Heal and grow.'
407
00:22:21,320 --> 00:22:23,920
Good to see you. Come in.
408
00:22:24,280 --> 00:22:29,200
Mark, are you OK?
409
00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:29,200
I've been feeling
a little low lately, but...
410
00:22:29,760 --> 00:22:34,760
What happened with your...?
411
00:22:30,960 --> 00:22:34,760
Oh, that's nothing.
Jeremy just hit me.
412
00:22:35,360 --> 00:22:40,920
With the ladle.
413
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:40,920
Jesus, Jeremy, you can't go round
hitting people with ladles! >
414
00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:46,240
He shouldn't have pepper-sprayed me.
415
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:46,240
What's going on?
You've been away for...
416
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:48,960
Sophie, Sophie, Sophie, relax!
417
00:22:49,160 --> 00:22:52,120
I'm fine! Life is fine.
418
00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:58,800
'Cool, wet grass. Cool, wet grass.'
419
00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:58,800
I'm having therapy.
I'm going to the solarium.
420
00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:03,880
I have spoken with the Citizens
Advice Bureau. Nothing's killing me
421
00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:06,840
Yeah...? Good. Erm...
422
00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:12,040
because I wanted to apologise
about work. I know you wanted it.
423
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:17,440
'Lying bitch!'
424
00:23:13,120 --> 00:23:17,440
'Not bitch.'
425
00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:17,440
It's fine, fine, fine.
426
00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:24,920
I've let go of all that... stuff.
427
00:23:20,120 --> 00:23:24,920
Yeah?
428
00:23:20,840 --> 00:23:24,920
Totally.
429
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:24,920
Great. To tell you the truth,
430
00:23:25,120 --> 00:23:29,920
you're well out of it – it's
all politics. I don't want the job.
431
00:23:29,920 --> 00:23:33,920
Barbara made me write
an application letter to Regional.
432
00:23:33,920 --> 00:23:38,680
Ah! Right!
433
00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:38,680
'She didn't.. I'm such a cockmuncher'
434
00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:45,440
'No, not cockmuncher.'
435
00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:45,440
I just wanted to say I enjoyed
the badminton and everything –
436
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:48,240
I hope you're back on my team soon.
437
00:23:48,240 --> 00:23:57,240
Your team.
438
00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:57,240
'Heal and grow.'
439
00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:57,240
Well, it's very nice for the big lady
to come and talk to the little man.
440
00:23:57,600 --> 00:24:04,680
I'm surprised you can see me
from up there in your ivory tower.
441
00:24:02,280 --> 00:24:04,680
If that's how it is, fuck off.
442
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:08,880
< Sophie, Sophie, Sophie, don't go!
Sophie, I...
443
00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:12,200
Hey, Mark! I found it!
444
00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:17,240
It's for your own good. >
445
00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:37,720
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ANDY BURROWS
33030
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