Original subtitles

Not me!

coffee machine.

Brock Wilder sat gazing at his captors, knowing full well if he divulged the

information, his life would be valueless to them. Someone's discard note out.

I'll take it. I'm closer to the trash. Maybe this is important.

Did anybody lose this?

Brock Wilder sat gazing at his captors, knowing full well... Oh, good heavens,

Frank, it's mine.

What is it?

Something I've been working on, that's all.

A novel.

A novel? You wrote a...

Stop it, Frank.

I just started writing it as a lark, something to fill up my free time. Well,

what's it about? Who's this Brock Wilder guy?

He's a CIA agent caught up in foiling an attempt by terrorists to seize control

of nuclear arms. May I have that, Frank? Tall, lengthy, a man of few words.

Brock would not let his facial expression betray the emotions churning

him.

Gee, now who does that sound like? Please, Frank.

I'm not quite ready to show it around.

I finished it last night and I came to the office to make a copy for Doris. Oh,

sure. You'll let your wife read it, but not me. Your friend.

Someone once shared with you a poem he wrote for Darlene in research.

A very personal poem.

You showed it to me because you needed a word that rhymed with stamina.

Let me read it. I'm already hooked.

Please.

Oh, all right, Frank. You can read it. Read it.

Did you get that memo Miles sent about the annual sponsors meeting? Yes. Looks

like it's our turn to make the keynote address.

I have time to work on it tonight, if you're free. It's a date. My shirt,

Thanks. Jim wrote a novel. Oh, repeat. He wrote a novel? Jim, get out of here.

How come you never mentioned it?

Oh, I don't know. I'm not sure it's very good. I just finished it. It needs

polishing. Say no more. Writing a novel must be a very private thing. But when

you're ready to have your friends read it, I'd be honored to. Thank you for

understanding, Murphy. Hey, Murph.

It's about the CIA agent Brock Wilder. Kind of the strong, silent type.

Oh. You let Frank read it? He offered to give me his opinion. Counting Doris,

that makes two. I wouldn't be comfortable showing it to more people

right now. I hope you understand.

Of course I do. I understand perfectly.

Hey, you know what I'm thinking now?

That time you checked me into the Betty Ford Center and I told you about my

deepest fears of failure, which I guess is nothing compared to the time Frank

gave you the name of a good car wash. But if you prefer Frank to me... Are you

going to make me guilt -ridden and miserable until I show it to you? You

All right, you can read it.

Read what?

Jim's written a novel, but he's really not ready to show it yet. He said we

could read it.

We can!

book, The Story of a White House Dog.

I'll make copies for each of you, but please don't mention it to anyone else.

Morning,

people. Oh, all right, Miles.

There'll be a copy on your desk tonight.

Oh, hi, Frank. Hey, did you watch the Bullets play last night? Bernard King

playing like a Hall of Famer. What are you doing?

Just looking at your hair.

Dear smoky blonde shoulder -length treasures, you smell like the warm

nights of lost youth.

And I want to look at those legs that go on endlessly and look as though they've

been carved on a lathe in heaven.

What are you talking about?

Jim's novel.

Did you read it? Oh, yeah.

Geez, all that intrigue and sex.

I didn't know Jim had it in him. The writing wasn't bad, although I

Hey, I'm not looking for a literary review here. I'm talking about the woman

Jim's character meets skin diving in Rio.

The foreign correspondent named Monique. The one he has the hot, passionate

affair with.

It's you.

What? Oh, come on.

Don't tell me you didn't notice.

Monique is a successful, outspoken journalist with a fiery temper who

plays to win.

Frank, you've been starting up your car with the garage door closed again.

I just think it's interesting that all these years, Jim has had a secret

attraction towards you, and I missed it.

Hey, Murph, what about that elevator scene? I never thought two people could

actually make it.

Hi. Oh, hi, Miles. You're just in time. Frank's gone insane. Let's watch.

This isn't a social call.

I have something important to discuss with you, Monique.

Murphy, I see the potential for a certain amount of awkwardness that could

disrupt the synergistic balance among certain people who must work here

together, side by side, day after day.

So I hope no one would do anything to encourage anything or anything.

Am I making myself clear? No! What kind of language is that? Encourage what?

Goings on and such.

I read the elevator scene.

Look, you guys, you're just reading things into this that simply aren't

But if you don't believe me, why don't you go talk to Jim about it? Talk to Jim

about something as personal as this?

You've got to be kidding me. That'd be like talking to my father about sex.

Look, Jim's obviously had certain thoughts about you buried in the back of

head. Only now they've come to the front of his head and out of his hand and

onto paper. If we don't get this thing in the butt, something bad is going to

happen. I'm not going to listen to this anymore. You know, you guys are both

crazy.

The Walk.

Did everyone have a pleasant evening last night? Anything of interest or note

occupy your time? Jim, I just want to say I read your novel, and I'm seeing

name right at the top of the bestseller list. Did you really like it, Murphy?

I'm so glad.

Did anyone else read it?

We liked it. Oh,

Jim! I just finished reading your book, and it was really, really good.

Why, thank you, Corky. I'm very flattered. But there's something I want

you about the blonde woman, the one Brock has the affair with in the

the aggressive, overbearing, pushy one who always steps all over people to get

what she wants. Yes?

Did you realize you were writing about Murphy at the time, or was it just an

accident?

Murphy? You think Monique is Murphy?

That's preposterous. Ha! I told you.

So you two also thought, oh, this is rich.

How could any rational person entertain such a notion?

Hello, everyone.

Doris. Doris, Doris, Doris. It's Doris.

How lovely to see you here. I didn't expect a visit from you, but it's always

welcomed, always.

Well, actually, I stopped by to see Murphy. Murphy? Murphy? Murphy? Murphy?

I was wondering if perhaps you'd like to have lunch with me today. It's been so

long since we've done that.

Actually, I promised some orphans I'd take them. I really want to do this,

Murphy. I really want to have lunch.

Okay. After all, it is the second most important meal of the day.

How about Phil's at one? Oh, good.

That'll give me time to run a few errands.

Well, good seeing all of you.

Goodbye, dear.

Murphy, see you at one.

So pleased you were able to break away so the two old friends might have lunch

together. Me too.

So how about these two old friends go take a table? Lead the way, old friend.

So, see, I had some luck at the shopping game.

Oh, yes, there are some lovely shops on Connecticut Avenue.

I found a luggage store that I know Jim would like.

Although he certainly isn't on the road as much as he was when we were first

married 30 years ago.

A different person might have worried about her husband being gone so much,

not me.

Of course, some woman might cast her spell over him and draw that sweet,

unsuspecting man into her clutches.

But I know I could invite that woman, whoever she is, to the hardware store

that's next to the luggage store and put her head in a vice.

I think I'll have the chef's salad.

Doris, I know what this is about, and all I can say is...

Monique is just a character that Jim made up.

Impossible. Jim simply does not have that kind of an imagination.

A man who owns 17 pairs of brown socks does not suddenly wake up one morning

think, now there's something I'd like to try in an elevator.

Doris, I want you to listen to me because I value our friendship very,

much. Now, there are things I'll never know about Jim that you do, and there

things I know about Jim that you never will.

I know how he taps his knee under the anchor deck three times for luck before

every broadcast.

And I know that he didn't want anyone to see he cried when we did our piece on

Vietnam veterans.

I know he always orders lemon shrimp and fried rice from Woe Pigs on show night.

And I know something else. I know Jim Dial loves Doris Dial very much.

And he loves me, too, as a friend.

The Jim we both know isn't going to jeopardize either of these

I feel more than a little foolish.

Like some jealous housewife.

Murphy, I... I don't need to apologize.

Hello there.

Jim.

Hello, Jim.

And I'm happy to see you too, Doris.

Ah, you've done some shopping.

What have we here?

Oh, good heavens.

Oh, here you are, having lunch.

Jim, everything is fine.

It's fine, dear.

Fine? Well, I knew it would be. I was just passing by because I wanted the

pleasure of seeing your lovely face in the middle of the afternoon.

But I've seen it now, so I'll just be on my way.

Oh, Jim, what time can I expect you home tonight?

Oh, you shouldn't wait up. Murphy and I have to finish a project together, and

it could go pretty late.

I see.

Well, don't work too hard, dear.

And, Murphy, after lunch, perhaps we'll stroll by that hardware store, just so

you know where it is.

Now, why don't we open with that demographic chart of our audience, and

sponsors will know who's seeing our ads.

Sorry. My fault. Go ahead.

I don't know, Jim. I'm not sure if we should start with a lot of facts and

figures.

It'd be better to end with this one.

That's an interesting point. Maybe we should just begin by talking about the

great tradition of legs in broadcasting.

FYI has great staying power, thus the use of the term legs, meaning, you know,

to still be there while others have long ago tried to kill themselves.

I know what you meant, Jim. What else could you have possibly meant?

I'm just going to go get a cup of sex. Coffee!

Look, all the information we need is here. We'll just put this after this.

Go here, go there.

What's this part? I can't read this one.

It's the quarterly report of incremental ratings expansion. You'll read it

across like so.

Jim, did you just smell my hair?

Oh, dear Lord, no. I was merely clearing some dust from my nasal passages.

Would you like to go to Phil's? Yes.

It'll be good to see Phil.

Very good to see Phil.

He's much better on a full stomach.

Can I have a large lunch?

Cookie!

Oh, hi!

I know you two are busy, but I thought I could just tit -toe in for a fresh cup

of coffee. Oh, you did? Well, now my train of thought is shot to hell.

Blasted, I can't work like this.

Enjoy your evening.

Oh, my God, it's Murphy.

What's Murphy? Monique. Monique is Murphy, and Murphy is Monique. Oh, geez.

was right. You wrote about Murphy. I don't want to hear anymore.

Okay, what happened?

There I was in the office with good old Murphy.

Suddenly, she began to look different to me.

And I found myself with certain healings. And?

I smelled her hair. Oh, God, no.

That's it. Starting tomorrow, nobody writes anything down, and all the women

wearing hairnets. Okay.

Looking at women and thinking about women is perfectly normal.

Even if it's Murphy. What do you say, Frank? You walk around fantasizing about

every woman in the office?

Well, yeah.

It doesn't mean anything. It's like when I first met Murph. I tried to pick her

up. Then she opened her mouth and it pretty much killed the fantasy format.

Jim, the important thing to remember here is that this is not going to change

your relationship with Murphy at all. It's just a little game between the ears

that men get to play.

Miles, has this ever happened to you?

Well, remember the time Murphy chewed me out in front of the crew for not

approving her travel expenses?

That night, I dreamed we were on American Gladiators.

He was wearing my bathrobe and beating me with a pugil stick.

I liked it.

And you're worried?

Don't you see the situation is different with me? I put my thoughts about Murphy

in print.

Men, we're nothing but animals.

Can any women sit around and talk about us this way? Are you kidding? It's not

in their nature.

And on a scale of one to ten, I'd give Frank's butt a seven.

When I first met Frank, he tried to pick me up. He was kind of cute, but he was

wearing pants that were baggy in his seat. That pretty much killed it for me.

Do you think Jim has hair on his chest? It seems right.

Oh, God, Jim.

Okay, let's quit stalling. I know there's a way to handle this. I just

knew what it was.

Well, Murphy, it's so obvious.

He clearly wants you. You have to get that fantasy right out of his head.

I didn't ask for this. Men have always been attracted to me. It's a curse.

Murphy, let's deal with one fantasy at a time.

Now, you respect him, but he's a man.

He has no control over himself.

You're a woman.

It's your responsibility to try to heal the relationship.

Otherwise, you're never going to be able to face him. I know. We're supposed to

work together tomorrow night. How am I going to do that? What am I going to say

to him?

Hey, Jim, pass me a pencil and try to ignore my ripe, inviting lips that make

man want to forget his own name.

Murphy, you'll talk about this problem. You have to get it out in the open.

Confront him.

Discuss it. It's the only way.

Now, remember, Jim, avoidance is always the answer.

She'll probably try to get you to talk. Women always do that. But be a basic.

Keep moving. Don't let her pin you down on anything. Work talk only, Jim. No

chit -chat. Chit -chat is death.

Uh, Jim, before we get to work, we have to talk about something. Oh, hey, Lane,

gotta go.

Murphy, I really don't think there's time to talk. We've, uh, got a lot of

ahead of us. Really a lot, and an incredible amount.

Jim, what I have to say can't wait.

I'm telling you, we have too much to do.

Let's order dinner. How about wolf pings? I like the lemon shrimp.

Jim, you want me, and we have to talk about it.

And the fried rice is good. I think I'll have that.

Jim. We can't just ignore what's going on between us. We have to talk about it

because it's not going to just go away.

Now, I think you have a little crush on me.

I think you'll feel better if you admit it. No.

Jim, I want you to look at me.

Come on.

Look at me.

Jim,

please. You know how important this is.

Now, come on.

Look at me.

And tell me what's going through your mind.

Good.

Good. Now, what are you thinking?

I was thinking how attractive those glasses look on you.

Well, thank you.

Now, that wasn't so hard, was it?

Now, let's go a little deeper.

In fact, why don't I start?

You know, once I was sitting next to you at the anchor desk, and just for a

flash, I wondered what kind of underwear you were wearing.

Really? Yes, I did.

You see, once you get these things out in the open, it seems sort of silly,

doesn't it?

Yes, I guess it does.

Now it's your turn.

Have you ever imagined anything about me?

Well, actually... Come on, I know this is hard.

I was... Just now, thinking about something.

Yes, go on.

About you and me. Right.

Making wild, crazy love in this chair.

Or maybe on the Xerox machine.

Ernie, the janitor, is in the next room.

Okay, this has been very helpful. Now, why don't we get back to work?

Oh, Gerard, what was I saying?

Where did that come from?

There's too much talking here. Let's get back to work. No, no, no, no.

There's no going back now. Murphy.

We have to work this out. We have to talk this through.

No, no, no. We just ignore it. It'll go away.

I've obviously been carrying around a lot of very strong feeling for you.

Buried so deep I wasn't even aware I had it.

When did it start?

Probably in Rome when we found that little cafe when we were researching the

Vatican Bank scandal.

Remember that?

Rome? Little cafe?

Nope. Doesn't ring a bell.

I remember it so vividly.

I watched the way you ate your pasta primavera with such passion.

Then we walked outside into the hard rain, your hair

all wet and tousled.

Then you got into a fight with that cab driver.

Oh, yeah.

He tried to overcharge us. I got out of the cab and cracked his headlights with

my umbrella.

Oh, that was fun.

Fun?

The man was only slightly smaller than a refrigerator.

He punched me. My nose was bleeding all over my new custom -made shirt. You have

a way of antagonizing people, Murphy.

Every time we travel, I have to defend you every five minutes. Imagine an

life like that.

It could be exciting.

The blood always racing, like that time in Paris. What time in Paris?

We had just finished our story on Mitterrand. We were exhilarated. We went

that little cinema to see Après Amour.

I remember.

Sitting there in the dark with you, the smell of your perfume enveloped me.

Then you started yelling things at the screen.

Hey, the pictures stink, okay? A bunch of people smearing each other with brie

isn't my idea of good storytelling.

I had to get out of there.

Oh, yes, I remember you driving us back to the hotel. My whole life flashed

before me. We're going through traffic, driving up on the sidewalk in front of

the Louvre. Men don't like that, Murphy.

That and you're never letting people finish a sentence when they're in the...

That's not true.

You see?

God, you and me.

I could just see myself in ten years talking to strangers in the park just to

hear the sound of my own voice once in a while.

And I could forget about buying furniture I like.

Maybe if I were lucky, I could keep one of my Peggy Lee albums.

God, what was I thinking? I must have been insane.

Lord, I'm feeling much better.

Like some awful fever has broken.

You were right, Murphy.

I'm so glad we talked. Aren't you?

Oh, yeah.

I feel really great about myself now.

Maybe I'll just top off the night by trying on a bathing suit under

light.

Now that that's settled, let's finish this up so I can get back to work on my

novel. Your novel? Wait a minute. Isn't that how all this trouble started?

Oh, don't worry, Murphy. It's just a little rewrite.

Monique is going to be a lovely and, I hope, forgiving redhead that Brock's

married to for 30 years.

I like it.

I like it a lot.

Thank you, Murphy.

It's so nice to know I can count on you even after I've made a complete ass of

myself.

Hey, you've always been there for me.

I love you, Jim.

I love you, Murphy.

So, should we get some work done, Slugger?

By the way, Miles told me something at Phil's last night about a dream he had.

You were in it, and, well, you may want to have this same conversation with him.