Original subtitles

You've bought this fish.

lt's called a sea-bream.

How much was it?

Very dear.

Meaning?

At least 120 francs l think.

This is my first present to you, a pebble.

This is the second

a leaf

shaped just like your back.

l found it in the Parc Monceau.

Here's the third, another pebble

which is from Brazil.

This is a whaler

done by my father, in paper and Indian ink.

My father was killed when l was eight,

his driver fell asleep at the wheel.

Sunday.

20th February. Snow.

- And the cat's come in. - Yes.

1 , 2, 3...

4, 5, 6, 7.

7 is my number.

1 , 2, 3...

4, 5, 6, 7.

7 is my number too.

This is the brain...

of a tern

that hibernates by the Red Sea.

- And where's the Buddha from? - Thailand.

- Those are my marbles. - Where do they come from?

From the garden. Everyday l get some through the window.

- Who sends them? - The little girl.

- What little girl? - The one on the fifth floor.

ls she telling you something?

Yes.

Do you talk?

No. l definitely don't want to discuss it with her.

Why don't you?

Because she'll be round here all the time!

Were you scared when the blood tests came?

l don't know. l held on to the envelope without opening it.

The only thing l've ever been afraid of is being pregnant.

A bun in the oven, never!

- How long were you a dancer? - Ten years.

- You're still vigorous in the foot? - Yes.

There's a full moon.

For hundreds of months now

with you, it's the same,

the day the moon is full, it happens,

it's amazing.

''Will you buy my heart? It is for sale.

Will you buy it, and not let us fight?

God made it a magnet, you shall make it tender.

God made it a magnet for one lover only.

l decide the price, will you hear what it is?

l decide the price, do not be surprised.

ls yours all yours? Give it, and be my master.

ls yours all yours? Will it pay for mine?

lf it is not yours, l've only one thing left.

lf it is not yours, all is said.

Mine will slip shuttered through life.

Mine will slip straight to God.

Where love's concerned life goes fast.

Where love's concerned the days are short.

The heart must run like clear water.

The heart must run must love and die.''

How short-sighted are you?

Four l think, four under.

- And the other eye? - Seven under, or six. l don't know.

Exactly. Five under and seven under.

That must hurt there, on the bridge of your nose, it's torturing you,

why not change them?

l don't know that either!

Because, look, my glasses are...

there... more comfortable

on the bridge of my nose.

When l put your glasses on upside down they suit me perfectly.

My right ear's lost half its hearing, 500/o...

and you took me, one sunny day...

to Le Perreux, to see a surgeon

who'd operated on both your ears

and stopped you from going deaf.

l saw him in his sunny consulting rooms, l wasn't afraid...

The sun shone on the table where l was examined

and when l was finished you were in the corridor.

You kissed that man

who'd saved you, as we were leaving.

When you have the operation, if it works like mine did

you'll see, the world will seem very odd,

a kiss will sound like a storm

your hair will make a racket,

and someone else will have to flush the toilet for you.

You gave me the keys to your place,

but not the keys to those strange bars

over the French windows that look on to the garden.

When l came here for the first time

l immediately noticed this picture of your father

and l thought with a father like that

nothing bad could happen here.

And then there was this Russian landscape.

Your father's name was Vladimir, Vlad.

l'm very fond of it because of the two priests chatting,

they're about to have tea.

And do you remember that room?

When Daddy died?

lt was in Morocco, at night,

someone knocked and asked Mummy to open up,

saying Vlad had had an accident,

and Mummy said, but l know he's dead.

Every night we massage our feet, because you don't sleep well

and l sleep like a log.

lt's what Russian grannies do in the evenings.

Either that or they scratch the soles of your feet,

which is lovely.

lt's my turn now.

lt's true l don't sleep at night,

so l try to read very very boring books,

because action or Maupassant stories, they stimulate me.

l eat, l go and have some honey and bread

and when l see you asleep, that helps,

l like that.

To get into your room, there are nine doors.

We went to Istanbul

for my work

and the bed in the hotel

was just right.

We checked the measurements

it was 1.60 by 2 meters

and when we got home, we changed the bed.

l've broken the knife it's a tough one.

As soon as we met, three months ago, we swapped watches.

You got the white one, l got the black one.

They don't have quite the same time.

This morning l went to the station,

l suddenly felt like

going to my home town and getting you

the blue from a stained glass window

they used to point out to us children

as something nearly perfect.

l tried to get it for you but...

it's either the face or the blue

so l'm fumbling slightly.

Perhaps l get chilly when you're not there.

When you're not there, l become a shadow.

l wanted to get you a present,

a blue present...

but that blue is impossible to capture.

l couldn't find a hotel room

that was decent so l changed...

l have a place to come back to,

a corner of the world to come back to

and you, you haven't.

So l wanted to bring you something wonderful

but all l've got is a description of a room

which is poignant.

ln the end, this room is

more remarkable

than my stained glass blue, l don't know why.

lt's just occurred to me

how striking it is,

perhaps because l can film it.

The shower doesn't work.

l don't know where to have dinner.

l imagine the gates of hell

are like this concertina

between the bedroom and the bathroom.

There. l'm shattered. l'm exhausted.

l'll tell you a secret but you mustn't tell.

Here's some coffee

and some milk

and seven lumps of sugar,

seven lumps

and some bread, there.

Fill it up with bread, to the brim, soaks it all up.

That's what my grandfather had every morning

and watching him, as a child, those were the only times

l was happy.

And it smells delicious.

You've found a wonderful thing

to get me to sleep,

you read me half a page of an Arsène Lupin story

which you love and that's it.

You've bought some new glasses which don't hurt your nose.

That's the Brazilian stone you gave me,

l took it to give me strength

when we brought Mummy to church

for the last time.

Mummy was like me,

you know l always find parking places,

well she found four-leaf clovers.

You'd stop the car, she'd open the door,

and find four-leaf clovers without getting out of the car.

Anywhere. Even in Paris.

ln the flower-beds on the Champs-Elysées.

lt was her thing. l wish l had it.

When l was little in Africa, at Yaoundé

you had to be careful because of the insects

in your bed, in the shower, in the toilet

and that one was in my bed.

We kept it in a box which l found,

split open, all the insects had turned to dust.

lt's called a rhino.

Wednesday morning, Mummy departed.

And l was having my moon again...

Well, by two o'clock, l had nothing left

and this rose was given to me by my brother.

This morning when l went to feed the birds, there's a small fountain

and this bird was in the fountain, dead.

Which is not surprising, because ever since he was born

his parents never looked after him and nor did l because

l didn't want to go against nature.

l wanted... he had his chance... and then...

This little box l'll take it on to the bridge

and drop it in the Seine, down-river.

l'll throw it in, with a pebble.

This is at Mummy's, we called her Mimoute.

That's her chimney and l put the irises there,

the same as l put in her box, before they closed it.

l put them in because Iris

means messenger between gods and men.

l put seven irises in.

Behind that door is Mummy's room, Mimoute.

When the funeral man came

he had to ask for a sheet

because we could see everything.

So we put up one of her mother's sheets

and wondered what he was doing behind it.

The room is empty. All the furniture has gone.

When Mummy was gone, Jean, Daniel and l stared at the blue pot.

Secretly, we all wanted it.

Then one of us, Daniel l think, said ''Oh what a shame, look...

''The top is broken.''

lt was very pretty, a rose l think.

Also, we'd found this bit apart from the rest.

And that bit had a plant in it.

l took the pot to remove the plant.

Look at the state it is in.

So to keep it together, l taped it up.

Though the tape hasn't held.

There it is, my pot.

One of the few desires the three of us shared.

Still, it's indicative

of our inheritance.

When l was 15 or 16

l was going down Avenue Paul Doumer. It was springtime,

l was going towards La Muette,

on the left-hand pavement

and ahead a man was walking,

he must have been about 35 or 40. He was odd

dressed in black his face...

was thin, with a long nose.

He came towards me l felt uneasy.

Then he passed me and as he passed,

he came up very suddenly

and put his hand on my sex, like a pincer.

l was so astonished, but he was gone, he didn't even look back.

l felt awful.

l went home quickly, down the rue Scheffer

then l came here, had a shower and washed my knickers.

For months and years after, l was haunted and l even...

l couldn't talk about it...

l think you're the only, the first person l have told.

And there's the washbasin l had as a girl.

Last night l was awake

and suddenly you sat up..

''Where's my catty? Where's my cat?''

Because he's roaming a bit and you're afraid

he'll find another mistress.

Then suddenly you heard him

and you crossed over the bed,

you passed right over me.

You hurt me, so l said..

''Stop! That hurts!'' Like that.. ''Stop!''

You froze

and l sensed you were crying

because l'd been so rough,

so in the dark l put my finger like that, on the edge of your eye,

and l was right,

there was a big tear, like a little lake.

Now it's spring.

The thrush has come back for the first time.

And l've pruned everything in the garden. The hydrangeas are ready.

l've cut back the forsythia.

l've put in some little ferns

l found with my sister in the forest.

And do you know why l'm happy Mummy's dead?

everything's back in place. She's with Dad.

And as you know, children

want their Mummy and Daddy to be together.

ln the aviary, all the nests are full.

The mandarin ducks are laying.

The canary cannot lay, nor hatch her eggs,

nor can the humming-birds. Two of them have got away.

We have to think of something. l am fed up.

l got up early

to show you my parents' house

with the shutters closed.

Last night before bed, l opened my bag.

l got out a T-shirt,

and folded in the middle l found your little notebook!.

lt's full of lovely things.

These are my father's Iast pair of shoes.

l found them in the attic.

He can't walk now he can't see.

He lets his dog in once a day and gets his ears licked.

''Monsieur Le Boisy unexpectedly...

asked for a device not used since the fifteenth century..

heavy arms and armour,

embarrassingly old-fashioned.

Why did Joan of Arc's brother wish to be weighed down thus?

According to Brantôme the reason was an old arm-wound...''

l filmed my father

without his seeing, naturally, since he's blind,

and if he'd seen me he would have told me to stop.

We had a chat, maybe our first...

since the day l was born.

He said, ''l'm going''.

''My mind is at rest,

''l'm not scared of hell''.

l'm boiling. The house is in the seventies.

My parents are cold in their bones.

At night, before going to sleep, my father says a prayer

for those who have no one

to take them by the hand when they come to die.

l gave my mother this bird.

She says she touches it every night before going to sleep.

She also says the mirror over her basin

is too high now.

She's reading ''Maigret in New York'' for the umpteenth time.

lt's been ages since l've had such a...

nice quiet time.

And it's thanks to you.

Due to an incident on a suburban line

the train will be stopping additionalIy at Moret,

Fontainebleau and Melun.

Due to an incident, the train will be stopping additionalIy

at Moret, Fontainebleau and Melun.

l was back by eight.

l put the key in the lock

and it got stuck.

So l waited for you, on a bench in the street

for three hours!

Then you came home and we went round the back.

You had the lock changed.

There's a new key now. It's magnificent.

But that's come apart,

l can't go out with the bird.

And the watch has stopped.

On the thirteenth!

Do you think you can get a decent car for 40,000 francs?

Well l like it!

You're the driver l don't have a licence.

Listen, you said l was unlucky

not to be a woman.

What did that mean?

Because being a woman is...

- l never said that anyway. - You did!

l promised you two things.

You promised figs in the sun,

from a fig-tree.

And the moon over the sea.

And l've kept neither of my promises.

Well we're always just about to go...

But we stay here.

ln the cave.

You and l

were supposed to meet in Lyon.

l was coming from Vichy.

You from Paris, by car.

We were supposed to go on a trip.

We were to meet at the Hotel Terminus...

Pullman Perrache, near the station.

l got to Lyon at twelve.

We were meeting at two. l went for a walk.

l thought maybe l'll...

get to the bar at half past one

because she might be early.

l asked for an orange juice,

l read the paper.

l remember it was the New York Times

the Herald Tribune which was

on a seat beside me.

Two o'clock came

and knowing how punctual you are

l was sure you'd come in on the dot.

2.15... 2.30...

l called your answering machine...

l called our beloved mutual friend's machine...

and another Hotel Terminus because this one now wasn't Terminus

but just plain Pullman...

l was worried there'd been a mix-up.

l mixed up the numbers...

Gradually...

real fear

took hold.

l came back to my seat.

Three o'clock.

l'm exhausted

drained.

l don't exist.

l think about a man condemned to death

that l'd...

read about being executed.

He'd fallen asleep, he'd had to be...

he stopped living before the execution.

He'd been carried to the stake.

3.30...

3.40...

l remember that twenty years ago

l'd waited for someone for hours and hours

until a call came

saying they'd died in a car crash.

l think it's a quarter to four or ten to four

when you come in smiling.

You kiss me

but l can't get over it.

l can't see you,

l can't hear you,

l don't exist.

We get in the car

and go down to Valence...

l can't speak, l look at you, l can't see you.

l don't see the road l don't know where we are.

lt lasted all afternoon.

Till supper time.

We ate near Montelimar.

We slept near Montelimar too.

l got into a boiling-hot bath with you,

then we slept up against each other and this morning we left.

lt was a lovely day.

Provence was perfect.

l laughed,

both of us had a good laugh.

Then we got to this room.

The point of this trip

was to see a show

with this picture

which belongs to our friend

and which we see regularly at her place.

l wanted to see it elsewhere.

Even behind perspex.

l think it's the picture which means the most to me.

And that it should belong to a great friend

gives me immense pleasure.

l am going to come forward

first towards the boat...

then go left,

the rock...

and beside the rock on the right,

something that's always been enigmatic..

this abstract shape...

why did the painter put it there?

You were told it would never grow in your little yard...

Passion flower.

lt's called a Passion flower

because it contains all the tools of the Lord's Passion.

There's a crown of thorns, a hammer

and nails!

There we are.

When we were little, at Les Hirondelles

when we were bored

we'd eat apricots and then

turn the kernels into whistles.

But Philippe would leave a thingy inside

and it would sound like a policeman's whistle.

When l passed the shop it attracted me straight away.

l thought l want that for myself.

That didn't last long. l went in

and bought it for you.

l've still got my little plastic watch.

So l thought of another watch l had in a box

which l've often thought of getting mended.

This time it worked.

Now they tell the same time.

You picked this up on the beach at Etretat and gave it to me.

That's not how you do it. l'll show you.

You've got to wet it.

lt's sea-water, wait...

l'll put it back, l'll put it upside down...

My heart upside down...

l don't like you using that thing.

Water and electricity, you might electrocute yourself...

like Claude François,

in the bathroom.

But he was in his bath.

Doesn't it cut into your gums, if you do it everyday?

How long do you brush your teeth for?

3 or 4 minutes.

True. Your teeth are very white. Gleaming.

But what about your soul?

l remembered when l first opened

your medicine cupboard.

l found these bottles of scent

still almost full.

Presents perhaps. Then there was this one which l liked very much.

And l've got you one too.

You've nearly finished it, so l'll have to get some more.

The first time we had lunch you wore

this... this ring

and later you told me it was called a 'You and Me'.

l think l prefer

maybe... l'm fonder of... this here.

This is a present from your mother when you were a teenager.

l like it, it's fun, the way

its two eyes stare at me...

And then there's a candle...

l bought the day your mother died

and l've lit it again today.

14th July...

The tanks have been down the Champs-Elysées.

Now they're going home.

You tried to reach me

you wanted to call,

you wanted to make sure l was OK,

but you didn't.

There was a bomb in the metro

a bomb in a carriage.

Seven people died and lots of wounded.

The bins are shut tight now.

Passengers have to hold on to their bags

and point out any bags

that might be unaccompanied.

You've gone by car, l'm joining you in three days.

Last night l slept in my old place.

l've kept it to work in during the day.

l slept there, in my bed.

l've spent so many nights there

alone.

Since we met, it's the first time l've slept there.

ln my sleep, l fumble for a light that isn't here

and l had to add an extra blanket because l was cold.

Your place is on the ground floor, it's a snug cave.

Here...

You called to say you'd arrived safely.

The kitchen window.. l can see the offices

of Electricité de France.

The people who build nuclear power stations work in those tiny boxes.

You and l are not consulted.

My grandfather's watch...

the small hand the glass are missing.

My grandfather was from the Beauce, from Vendôme.

l was very fond of him.

l think that sort of love

is impossible to show on film,

as is my love for you.

You mentioned a watchmaker who might mend it,

find a hand that matches.

My father would have said,

''You moony bastard,

''love impossible to show on film,

''what kind of a poncy remark is that?

''Poncy's what it is.

''What are you up to?!

''Giving us your personal diary, with her?

''Filming anything you fancy?

''anything you feel like filming?

''And what is it you are filming?

''You're filming your love of love?

''What good will that do, laddy?''

That's what my father says...

And l reply,

''l don't know, Daddy.''

l took my keys out of my pocket

with a jerk

and dropped

the heart, the pebble you found me.

l kept it there for protection.

But l couldn't put it back in my pocket.

l couldn't put it back, l even went further.

l tried to break it. l thought how can l break this?

l tried hitting it with a hammer.

lt didn't break.

l put it on a shelf

and grew very fond of it, more and more.

But l couldn't put it back in my pocket.

The afternoon is over.

l'm stopping work. l'll go out.

l'll walk down the pavement.

l used to walk that way

to go to a bar

l went to almost everyday.

l'd have my first whisky, a delight

to the stomach and to the mind.

Then l'd have another and read the paper.

Then l'd eat alone

with a scrap of paper for taking notes

and a bottle of claret. Afterwards l'd go round bars, at night,

listening to conversations.

l'd turn left where you can see a zebra crossing.

Now l go right,

l go to the metro which takes me to you

who dislikes the taste of alcohol

and who's hardly ever had a drink.

On the right there,

there's the local tax office.

l'll go up a bit, l don't know what there is...

l'll go up a bit...

There's the sky, the dome of St Augustine,

which has just been restored

by the Republic, generous that she is.

Do you remember my dream l told you?

l told you l'd dreamt l'd...

closed my hand over a little bird, then l opened my hand,

there was a dead little bird that flew away.

lt's the same!

He's lovely.

He's watching us...

You're tiny, you should've stayed in your nest, you idiot...

What'll your mother say?

We don't mind being wrapped round like this

but the tortoise-bell

does not ring in the wind.

Oh, poor thing.

Look, we'll release it.

You've freed the lovers.

When l made this garden you can see, there was only

a small concrete courtyard.

everything here, l planted myself.

l made this garden on my own,

l didn't know anything, l still don't.

l did as l pleased.

No one's ever looked at this garden. People pass by, they say

''You're so lucky, it's lovely.''

But no one looks at it like you do.

This is just to have a bit of blue.

l've given you some red, some blue and some space.

l make up little notebooks.

l make little notebooks out of cardboard and paper.

Then l slide...

l take notes, in passing,

telephone numbers, appointments...

l've found a page that says..

''l didn't read it

l just found a blank page to say

l'm in ---- with you. Come home soon.

The thrushes in the water without you are less sweet.

Not to mention the nights and the days,

the mornings and evenings, and always.''

She's bought a thing to... make eggs.

l've almost locked myself up in the kitchen to film it

because whenever l bring the camera out now, l feel

she closes up, she's suspicious.

Things have changed...

This says whether you want them hard or soft.

And here there's a spike.

You prick them

and put them there.

l don't know, she's... she's worried.

Her eyes glaze over a tiny bit

when she sees the camera.

She's thinking. When l discuss it

she seems not to mind

but l mind a bit.

You have to close it

and plug it in.

Then it rings, it steams up and rings.

l think you're mad.

Do you hear?

Well it doesn't exist. That's that. It has to go.

l'm sleepy.

l'm sick of it. l can't even pee.

l can't wash, l can't do anything.

You won't stop filming.

l'm tired.

This watch business is far from finished.

lt'll go on and on, like time itself.

l was silly enough to tell you

that l wanted to buy myself the watch

l gave you.

Today's my birthday.

What have l got?

You went to the same shop.

But the subtlety is, it's not quite the same!

l discover...

you, the year your father died.

''Please do not urinate in the shower.

The toilet is next door.''

l can't remember what it's called l told you on the beach.

l think it's a little petrel.

lt's dead.

lt's a baby wing.

He wasn't strong enough to fly.

See, it's a snake

as well as a bird Iooks at the scales!

lt's so beautiful.

You buried it under this boat at low tide.

You're at your friend Volsy's.

l'm waiting for you in the car,

day-dreaming.

l'm remembering that when we met

l ached all over

my head, the right-hand side of my head,

my groin, my chest.

lt's all gone.

l was very suspicious too,

of everything.

- How was she? - She wasn't in.

This is paradise.

l was stung yesterday.

The ocean must be all blue and white.

And calm. There's not much wind.

l found this pretty black pebble

and the bird.

The weather's delicious. The sun's hot.

But the breeze is cool.

lf you raise yourself just a little, you feel cold.

You have to keep well in the hollow.

Afterwards, we clean our glasses because we can't see

for spray of the ocean.

He knows you're there.

He's thinking ''Shall l move?''

He's just like me.

When l met you, l wanted to know

about that delicious smell...

What delicious smell?

See? He's just like me.

But l'd do it from a distance.

From time to time, l'd come close.

You smelled so delicious.

He accepts you.

He's accepting you.

lt's wonderful!

He's dropped off.

Ah but l, my dear...

don't deal with the servants. You shall take them...

Very smarty farty.

l certainly do the farty bit.

She's the Venus de Fart.

The best of it is

l was at the beach and... put yourself there like that...

you were reading, l'll show you...

No! Go away!

lt was very lovely, l was at the beach, l was exactly...

you turned over and put your

lovely behind... No wait! Let me finish...

Your lovely behind about 6 inches

from my face and l thought that was delicious

and your behind was just a bit open

and your lovely arsehole was beautifully visible.

Suddenly...

a celestial breeze emerged!

Everyone can hear you!

lt was free and joyful!

l thought it was absolutely...

very lovely.

l promise, l mean it.

l'm not teasing.

Oh! l tell you delicious and adorable stories

and you go into a sulk.

- Everyone can hear you. - No one will hear.

- Can you hear them? - Yes.

- You can hear them? - No!

- Well how can they hear you? - They are whispering.

And l am shouting, shouting for love.

My love for an obsessive farter.

What's lovely

is that Madame Vidal will hear of it.

And she'll tell... and it'll reach Volsy.

Little by little it'll reach Volsy.

To make a bouquet of dried flowers,

you start by building a wall.

lt smells of Africa

it smells of saffron and pepper.

l mentioned your cat

and you started to cry, so we went

to your friends' house,

l went into the bedroom

so we could talk l wasn't sure what about.

So l took this pine cone you found

at the seaside and

your cat dying

is more important than...

You'd had him for eight years,

since he was born.

And since you were born, you've always had cats.

People say you only have one cat that counts.

That one was the one that counted.

He was weak he wasn't meant to survive.

Perhaps that's why you chose him.

You saved him.

You tried to turn it into

the masterpiece he was.

You're upset...

mainly because...

he died without you.

You weren't there to hold his paw.

He didn't die in bed with you.

With your warmth, as you say.

He was free he could do as he pleased.

Come in, go out, walk the streets, go and see his friends.

He could have an accident.

Before leaving you said to Claudine,

if he dies, it won't be your fault.

lt'll be his fate.

You say, ''five kilos of love''.

l'm protecting you.

But you can fly away.

What did we have to eat?

Sole...

oysters...

a crab...

clams.

- You didn't sleep well? - No.

l hurt myself.

You fell.

l thought l could grab you but no.

Luckily, there was a carpet.

You were sweaty and hot.

You were boiling.

l heard you say ''No!'' over and over again.

l meant yes.

Do you think so?

PARK IN REVERSE GEAR

Paluel Nuclear Power Station.

By the sea.

l don't feel well.

You've seen what's been shot so far and it's made you sad.

You said, if people see that...

it won't be ours any more.

That was a blow. l said, let's stop.

Then l said

it's only one thousandth, one hundred thousandth

of you and me that's on film.

And you've made me melt.

l didn't ever want to melt.

l've kept

Milinki's pine cone.

- Shall we burn it? - Yes.

They burnt Milinki.

So here goes.

l'll move that one so you can see it.

When l was waiting, l'd never know if you were coming.

l'd go through logs

so the fire was always a big one.

You know, l've always dreamt of having a house,

a fireplace, a fire and a cat.

l can't say you

because l didn't know about you.

Subtitles.. Pierre Hodgson

Subtitling TITRA FILM Paris