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I have confidence in myself,

I have confidence in life,

I am a blessed person with a lucky star.

I will walk again.

Yes, I will walk again.

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Originally,

the idea was just to ride my bike every day

and hangout with my friends.

A simple shared passion we reinvented

each time coming up with crazy new ideas.

To be honest,

they weren't always the most brilliant ones.

But when you live some place

lost in the middle of nowhere,

you've got to be creative or you get bored, real quick.

We were free,

a bit foolish, yeah, but man... we sure were happy.

And that is something they can't ever take away from us.

At some point, I started dreaming.

I pictured myself standing on the top steps of podiums,

being on a team, with sponsors and all that,

living from my passion and becoming the best.

But I realized that chasing your dreams

doesn't protect you from anything.

It actually makes you more vulnerable.

And one day,

you don't know why it happens to you.

The dream stops

and all that's left is darkness.

You close your eyes

and there's nothing there anymore.

So, you have to be quick and start looking for it again.

Because dreams fade away

if you don't concentrate on them hard enough.

So, I set about searching for the dream of that kid

who used to goof around on his bike with his friends

on a little village lost at the tail end of a valley,

and whose life had been broken into.

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It was the start of the French championship

and I just returned from the World Cup in Leogang.

I just got my first top-20 result

and I was over the moon.

I woke up super early

and got to the tent before everyone else.

Like seriously motivated.

Maybe a bit too much.

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And then, suddenly,

everything stopped.

First, the doctor arrived.

Next, paramedics rushed up and said it's serious.

That's when

you start asking yourself lots of questions:

"What's happening?"

"Why can't I feel my legs?"

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Two minutes and one sentence...

That's all it took to destroy everything.

And when the doctor told me it's over,

that I'd probably never walk again,

my world collapsed

and crushed my dreams at the same time.

Right now,

I want to feel the scratchy hospital sheets

but the only sensation is tingling

and a weight pinning my legs to the mattress.

Like they're buried in sand.

So, this is what it's like

to be paralyzed.

Half buried.

Alive up top...

and dead down below.

After about three or four days I think,

I got my stuff back, my phone, a few things...

And there I saw the flood of messages I received,

it was incredible.

From the entire cycling family,

from loved ones, from buddies...

They gave me a real boost.

I kept telling them that I was fine,

that it was a tough moment to go through

but that I'd bounce back, you know?

When the doctor told me

that I wouldn't be able to walk again,

it was impossible for me to believe.

Literally impossible.

I can't spend my life in a wheelchair.

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First, you close your eyes

and activate your neurones.

In your mind, a spark emerges from the darkness.

It ignites an electric current

that starts running through your body.

It goes down your neck, passes through your back,

connects your vertebrae and frees your spinal cord.

The electric current keeps going and knows where to go

and knows the path by heart.

It descends through your chest,

down to your legs and all away to your toes,

and every time it touches a muscle,

it sparks and creates new pathways.

On the outside, nothing is happening

but inside, thousands of sparks enlighten up your body.

And now, these electric currents

send impulses to all your muscles,

making them move together.

Your legs unfolding,

your feet sinking into the ground.

But you're not just moving forward...

you're making your dream come true.

But when you open your eyes,

reality slaps you in the face.

I've been doing this every day for three weeks now and...

still no movement.

It has to work.

It will work, no doubt about it!

I believe it, I'm beyond certain.

I have a lucky star,

I trust life, and I will walk again.

But I need more time

and I have less and less of it.

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When I was doing my visualizations,

I felt a very strong state of tranquility.

Like I was floating in a parallel world.

I could feel this current flowing downwards,

as if my spinal cord was heating up.

This current spreads through my nerves,

my legs and my muscles.

I could tell if my visualization was right

when I could feel the tingling in my legs.

It made me believe in it like a rock.

Because if I had sensations in my legs,

then something was happening.

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In any case,

I never believed the prognosis.

I've been in this hospital room for 73 days.

I'm stuck between these walls,

thinking the same positive thoughts

and visualizing the same positive outcome.

At night,

I do the physio exercises alone, in my room and bed.

I try to move my legs,

I try to get up.

And even though it would be easier

to just accept my situation,

to stop fighting...

I never lose hope.

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Yes!

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