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I do.
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Remember this.
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This weekend, this barracks is open to
your families. You understand?
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I'll have no gambling, no swearing. I
want culture and songs, hymns, sing a
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of hymns.
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Sarge, Sarge, nobody turned in the names
of their dates yet.
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Oh, come on, fellas. We'll have to think
of everything.
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Come on. Now, who of you guys haven't
got dates for the weekend?
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All right. How many of you guys' sisters
who are coming haven't got dates?
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Oh, come on, fellas. Stop making trades.
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Now, I want couples dancing at my hello
parents' dance.
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Your parents can come hundreds of miles
to see you dancing with each other.
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You all got sisters.
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Come on.
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Get those sisters moving.
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Well, do you want to take my sister out?
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Let's see her picture again.
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Oh, she's lost 14 pounds since then.
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I don't know.
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Well, ask Paparelli. He took her out
last year. He had a wonderful time.
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Hey, Paparelli.
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How come you got such a young sister?
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Did you take out Kodalki's sister last
year?
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Yeah.
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Well, she was 14 pounds this time.
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Forget it, Kandowski.
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I'm taking a shower. How about Trudy?
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When was this picture taken? It looks
kind of yellow.
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On my last furlough. That's me with my
arm around it. Last furlough, eh?
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What war?
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What do you mean?
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How come you got such a full head of
hair?
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Look, if you're not interested... See me
next year when I'm a little older and
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more settled.
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Very funny.
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Hey, Flashy.
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Well, Sugie, what do you say?
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Are you sure this isn't the same sister
you hooked me with last year? No, this
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is my other sister.
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Are you sure this is your sister?
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Looks an awful lot like Eartha Kitt.
Would I lie to you? Would you lie to me,
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Lassie? You showed me a picture of Lena
Horne. Look, Sugie, make up your mind.
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Yes or no? What do you say? Come on,
make up your mind.
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Not bad.
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Are you sure that's your brother with
his arm around your sister?
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Yeah. Looks an awful lot like you. Like
me?
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Are you kidding?
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He's got a full head of hair.
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Come on, what do you say?
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Hey, is that a horse in the background?
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Yeah. How come it's pulling a streetcar?
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Hey, Mullen. Yeah.
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You got a date yet?
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No. Hey, did you see my sister Trudy
when she was here last year? Yeah, why?
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Nothing.
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Hey, all right, time's up. Come on. Let
me fill in those names for the dates.
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Paparelli. Sorry, Sarge, I couldn't find
anything.
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Give us a little time, will you, Sarge?
A little time? Is this a little stalling
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tactics? Let me tell you one thing.
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This weekend, I will tolerate no
wallflowers. Sarge!
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Sarge. What is it?
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What's the matter? Doberman just got a
phone call.
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Yeah? It's murder.
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What? What is it? What?
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Doberman's sister is coming.
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Doberman's sister is coming here?
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Freeze!
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Raise your miserable meatballs.
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How dare you? Well, you know, she may be
a very lovely girl, and a guy would be
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lucky to have a date with her.
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Hey, fellas!
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Let me ask you something.
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Guess what? What?
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Sarge. Yes? Your sister is coming in.
I've got to fill out the paper. Her name
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is Diane. Isn't that a lovely name? Let
me get out of here.
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Sarge. What?
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Look, I told her so much about you. I
wondered if you'd like to take her out
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a date.
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Sarge, you've got a date with Joan
Hogan.
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Bless you. Yes, that's right.
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Yes. You remember, Joan Hogan is my
steady date.
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Oh, gee, I forgot.
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Say, Sarge. Yes? My sister is coming.
I'm taking Fleishman's sister.
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You are? Put me down, Sarge.
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Say, uh... Oh, I'm taking Dillingham's
sister.
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Claude. Oh,
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I'll go. Go on, there's his sister.
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Go on, there's his sister. Say,
Flashman, how about you? Sorry, Dwayne,
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uh... I'm taking Fender's sister. Wait a
minute, I'm taking her. You guys are
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crazy. I'm taking her. What?
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Anything, anything.
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I'll take anything.
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00:04:08,380 --> 00:04:09,380
Say,
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Gomez, you know my sister... Well, I'm
taking Pavarelli's sister.
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Hi, Doberman. Have you heard?
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What? My sister's coming here.
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Father.
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Son!
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May I ask you something? You think
anybody at the dance will be wearing a
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cummerbund like that? They wouldn't
dare. You're not kidding. When I
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in, I was fine.
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Goldman, you got a date for your sister
yet?
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Oh, look, Dwayne, I just thought of a
wonderful idea.
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When your sister joins you, you and her
can join Joan and I, and we'll see the
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parade together, we'll go to the dance
together.
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Thanks, Sarge, but that's not like
having a date, is it? I know, but it's
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00:05:04,190 --> 00:05:06,710
of so... All the other fellas' sisters
will have dates.
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00:05:11,230 --> 00:05:13,410
Ernie, there's nothing you can do. Yes,
there is.
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Now tell me, who hasn't got a date yet?
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Zimmerman. It figures, that little
snake. He's waiting till the last minute
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he can make a better deal for himself.
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I know how his mind works.
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Zimmerman will be taking Doberman's
sister. Oh, but Sarge... Put his name
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Zimmerman!
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Sarge, you can't force Zimmerman into a
miserable deal like that. Force?
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When I get through with him, he'll be
panting to take out Doberman's sister.
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This I gotta see. He might guess you got
a grand stamp seat. Watch.
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Come in.
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Want to see me, Sarge? Close the door.
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Come in, Fielding.
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What's up?
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Zimmerman, I'm in a spot and only you
can help me get off it.
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Me? You gotta take Joan Hogan off my
hands for the weekend.
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But she's the most beautiful whack on
the post. You're trying to ditch her?
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00:06:05,420 --> 00:06:07,440
Why? You like this? Why?
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00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:10,620
I'm fixing her up with the most
beautiful blonde on the post. He's
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questions. I'll get somebody else. No,
no, no. It's not that. It's just that
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if... You're trying to ditch Jose, Joan
Holger. You got something sensational
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lined up, huh?
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You ain't kidding. I'm taking Doberman's
sister. Now, look.
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Here's what you do. She's probably still
crying.
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Yeah. You be there. She'll need a
shoulder to cry on. Be tender. Be kind.
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then at the proper moment, ask her for
the date. You got nothing to worry
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Fielding, how can I thank you enough for
this? You thank me. How can I ever
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thank you?
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Oh, why should words go between two
friends? Just hurry over to the PX.
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waiting. Go on, pal. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
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He's hooked.
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Hooked? Sarge, are you crazy? Him dating
Joan, he'll get killed.
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He'll never get there. In exactly one
minute, he'll come tearing back in this
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room, demanding to take out Doberman's
sister. Are you kidding? Look at him,
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spruce enough to go see her. In 55
seconds, he'll be back right in here.
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you know?
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How do I know?
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I've been with this platoon long enough
to know how their sneaky little minds
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work.
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Look at him.
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He's up on cloud nine right now,
thinking of his date with Joan.
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By the time he gets to the door, he'll
start thinking.
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He's thinking, he's thinking, he's
saying himself, why would a smart guy
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Bill go on to ditch a beautiful girl
like Joan Hogan?
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Generous, he ain't. My best friend, he
ain't.
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Ah, why look a gift horse in the mouth?
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Joan Hogan. He left.
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Don't worry, by the time he hits the
steps, it'll dawn on him right now.
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Doberman's sister?
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Bilko's taking Doberman's sister.
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Oh, that sneaky little mind is grinding
away now.
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Doberman's sister, could it be possible?
Could she be beautiful?
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Maybe I'm missing out on something.
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What could Doberman's sister look like?
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Impossible.
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Joan Hogan.
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00:08:13,109 --> 00:08:14,690
Fielding Zimmerman, you lucky dog.
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He's gone again.
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Yeah, but the seeds of doubt have been
planted. He should be back in four
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seconds. I thought you were crazy. Put
his name up next to Doberman's sister.
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Crazy, huh? In four seconds.
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One, two, three, four.
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You're not making a sucker out of me.
What are you talking about? Put me down.
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I'll take Doberman's sister. Oh, please,
you promised.
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You put me down. Doberman asked me to
take her. Oh, please, Zimmerman. Please,
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you promised me.
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00:08:40,169 --> 00:08:41,809
Well, Sarge, you're a genius.
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You're the greatest, Sarge.
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There are so few of us left.
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00:08:50,050 --> 00:08:53,010
Hey, I'm here in Vegas.
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00:08:53,310 --> 00:08:56,650
They pay you a double for this, a friend
of mine said. Well, this isn't Vegas.
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What? You're going to take out my
sister?
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00:08:59,470 --> 00:09:00,510
A pal's a pal.
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00:09:00,730 --> 00:09:02,670
Oh, gee, Fielding, you're a prince.
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00:09:03,110 --> 00:09:06,510
I've been trying to get someone to take
her for a long time, but nobody wanted
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00:09:06,510 --> 00:09:07,850
to take her. Gee, I'm so happy.
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I'm going to take a shower.
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00:09:09,980 --> 00:09:10,919
A shower?
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00:09:10,920 --> 00:09:13,280
Yeah, I'm so happy, I don't know what
I'm doing.
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00:09:14,620 --> 00:09:17,420
What does she like?
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00:09:17,920 --> 00:09:21,280
She's the loveliest girl in the world.
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00:09:21,740 --> 00:09:22,960
Tell me more about her.
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00:09:25,040 --> 00:09:28,820
Jimmy, you're slipping your trolley. Are
you actually taking out Doberman's
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00:09:28,820 --> 00:09:31,040
sister? What are you doing, paying off
an election bet?
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00:09:31,340 --> 00:09:32,460
Are you guys kidding?
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00:09:32,700 --> 00:09:36,940
How crazy can I be? If I'm taking out
the girl, I'd build her with ready -to
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00:09:36,940 --> 00:09:38,240
-ditch Joan Hogan over, huh?
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00:09:38,860 --> 00:09:39,860
Hey, Doberman!
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00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:42,920
Vilco is ready to ditch Joan over
Doberman's sister?
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00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:45,340
I can't believe it. Doberman's sister?
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00:09:45,580 --> 00:09:49,780
Why not? It figures it happens all the
time. It's always the slob in the
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00:09:49,780 --> 00:09:51,300
who's got the most beautiful sister.
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00:09:51,760 --> 00:09:56,300
Yeah. Remember Big Nose Schultz over in
Company A? He couldn't bribe guys to
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00:09:56,300 --> 00:09:59,880
take out his sister. Remember what she
looked like when she showed up?
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00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:02,620
That lucky Zimmerman.
203
00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:05,340
I got a good mind to punch you right in
the nose.
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00:10:05,950 --> 00:10:09,230
What did I do? Well, Doberman asked me
to take her, but no, I got to wind up
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00:10:09,230 --> 00:10:10,109
with your sister.
206
00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:12,570
He asked me, too, but I'm taking Gomez's
sister.
207
00:10:12,830 --> 00:10:14,130
Yeah, and I'm taking your sister.
208
00:10:16,790 --> 00:10:21,010
What is this, a mass meeting? What's
going on? It's past lights out. Come on.
209
00:10:21,210 --> 00:10:23,750
Sarge, were you actually thinking of
taking out Doberman's sister?
210
00:10:24,090 --> 00:10:27,030
That Zimmerman with his big mouth, it's
all over the platoon now, huh? It
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00:10:27,030 --> 00:10:30,990
certainly is. Hey, Sarge, is she really
a knockout? Oh, a dream.
212
00:10:31,290 --> 00:10:34,210
How do you know? You've never seen her.
I don't have to know.
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00:10:34,920 --> 00:10:38,000
It's Musselman's Law and Theory of
Family Equalization.
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00:10:38,340 --> 00:10:39,340
Musselman's Law?
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00:10:39,480 --> 00:10:43,100
Well, certainly I think I can quote it
from memory, where the hereditary genes
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00:10:43,100 --> 00:10:46,060
are overcompensated in the genealogical
aspects.
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Sarge, please, say it in English.
218
00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:49,540
I'll give it to you plain.
219
00:10:50,700 --> 00:10:54,840
Musselman was a scientist. He devoted
his life to this research, and he came
220
00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:58,200
with a simple statement, which I'll tell
you in simple, basic English. What's
221
00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:01,440
that? The uglier the brother, the more
beautiful the sister.
222
00:11:01,740 --> 00:11:02,740
That's a law?
223
00:11:02,990 --> 00:11:03,990
Go fight with science.
224
00:11:04,170 --> 00:11:05,230
Musselman, he knew it.
225
00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:11,150
The uglier the brother, the more
beautiful the sister.
226
00:11:11,510 --> 00:11:15,570
Hey, if that's true, Doberman's sister
is Miss Universe.
227
00:11:15,890 --> 00:11:18,850
Yeah. I'll bet she's a tall, blonde
beauty.
228
00:11:19,210 --> 00:11:21,110
Nah. Doberman's got black hair.
229
00:11:21,530 --> 00:11:24,270
She's a brunette. Nah, nah, she's a
redhead.
230
00:11:24,510 --> 00:11:26,710
I know she's a redhead.
231
00:11:27,070 --> 00:11:30,250
Ah, what are we knocking ourselves out
for? Zimmerman has got her.
232
00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:33,610
Yeah. But that something should happen
to Zimmerman, huh?
233
00:11:34,190 --> 00:11:35,190
Yeah.
234
00:11:37,270 --> 00:11:41,710
Oh, get this. I got that little evil
mind's working overtime now. They're
235
00:11:41,710 --> 00:11:44,550
figuring a way to get it away from
Zimmerman, huh? Yeah.
236
00:11:44,890 --> 00:11:49,670
Gentlemen, there'll be some rare dreams
within these four barrack walls tonight.
237
00:11:52,150 --> 00:11:55,950
Every big name in Hollywood is here
tonight for the premiere of the gorgeous
238
00:11:55,950 --> 00:11:59,870
Diane Doberman's new picture. The crowd
has been here since 7 o 'clock this
239
00:11:59,870 --> 00:12:00,870
morning.
240
00:12:01,550 --> 00:12:03,250
Here's Miss Doberman's limousine.
241
00:12:03,630 --> 00:12:09,050
And with her is her fiancé, Fielding
Zimmerman, the producer of her new
242
00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:11,070
Stand back. Stand back.
243
00:12:12,730 --> 00:12:16,210
Miss Doberman, can I have one more
picture, please?
244
00:12:17,450 --> 00:12:18,450
Thank you.
245
00:12:19,150 --> 00:12:20,150
Thank you.
246
00:12:20,770 --> 00:12:23,610
As the producer of the picture, Mr.
Zimmerman, what do you think?
247
00:12:24,150 --> 00:12:25,610
Diane's picture is never missed.
248
00:12:25,950 --> 00:12:26,950
How did you meet Mr.
249
00:12:27,130 --> 00:12:30,130
Zimmerman? Oh, we met when...
250
00:12:30,680 --> 00:12:31,680
Glorious night.
251
00:12:32,280 --> 00:12:33,520
A weekend, you know.
252
00:12:34,220 --> 00:12:35,400
At an army camp.
253
00:12:36,220 --> 00:12:38,540
The dining just swept me off my feet.
254
00:12:38,740 --> 00:12:39,780
Can I have one more, Mr. Oldman?
255
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:41,440
Kissing Mr. Zimmerman this time.
256
00:12:43,340 --> 00:12:45,220
Oh! Let's get out of here.
257
00:12:46,100 --> 00:12:47,100
Hey, Diane.
258
00:12:47,340 --> 00:12:50,900
She wants me. She wants me. Hold it.
Hold it. It could be me.
259
00:12:51,140 --> 00:12:53,060
They all say that. Diane, wait.
260
00:12:53,360 --> 00:12:54,360
Wait, Diane.
261
00:12:56,940 --> 00:12:58,620
Diane. Diane, wait for me.
262
00:12:59,020 --> 00:13:00,160
She's mine. She's mine.
263
00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:01,900
Diane. Wait.
264
00:13:02,140 --> 00:13:03,420
Wait. Diane.
265
00:13:03,700 --> 00:13:04,760
She's mine. Wait.
266
00:13:05,020 --> 00:13:06,160
Wait. Diane.
267
00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:08,340
Diane. You're mine.
268
00:13:08,660 --> 00:13:13,400
Diane. Zimmerman, you dirty snake. I
hope your pictures are flopped. Sarge.
269
00:13:13,620 --> 00:13:15,240
Sarge. Wake up. What's the matter,
Sarge?
270
00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:16,440
What?
271
00:13:17,020 --> 00:13:18,020
Oh.
272
00:13:18,340 --> 00:13:19,340
It was a nightmare.
273
00:13:19,660 --> 00:13:20,660
A nightmare.
274
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,980
That's what it was. It was a dream. It
was a dream.
275
00:13:24,660 --> 00:13:26,320
But it's a dream that's going to come
true.
276
00:13:26,650 --> 00:13:29,530
I got to make it come true or I'll
regret it the rest of my life. Sarge,
277
00:13:29,530 --> 00:13:32,390
are you talking about? You don't
understand. I saw her. Diane Doberman.
278
00:13:32,390 --> 00:13:35,050
gorgeous. She's the most beautiful
thing. Sarge, Sarge, you ain't never
279
00:13:35,050 --> 00:13:36,050
her. What about Joan?
280
00:13:36,630 --> 00:13:37,630
Joan?
281
00:13:37,890 --> 00:13:39,730
That was just an infatuation, boys.
282
00:13:40,430 --> 00:13:41,430
This is the real thing.
283
00:13:41,790 --> 00:13:42,790
This is love.
284
00:13:43,030 --> 00:13:46,590
Sarge, Zimmerman has taken out
Doberman's sister. You talked him into
285
00:13:46,890 --> 00:13:48,730
I'll talk him right back into it again.
286
00:13:48,970 --> 00:13:52,270
No, Sarge, you ain't got a chance. Every
guy in the platoon is trying to get him
287
00:13:52,270 --> 00:13:54,650
to let go. He's got his teeth in her
like a bulldog. He'll let go.
288
00:13:55,180 --> 00:13:58,440
The minute he sees this picture of
Doberman's sister, he'll let go. Sarge,
289
00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:01,020
that's a picture of Seabiscuit. What
difference does it make? I'm burning it,
290
00:14:01,060 --> 00:14:04,280
ain't I? Burning it? Get in there and
very artfully drop a hint to him that
291
00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:06,980
got a picture of Doberman's sisters in
here. Go on. On a double. Look at that.
292
00:14:10,820 --> 00:14:13,020
Boy, I'd give anything to see that
picture.
293
00:14:13,220 --> 00:14:14,700
He just got it in the mail today.
294
00:14:15,500 --> 00:14:16,500
Doberman's sister.
295
00:14:24,430 --> 00:14:28,990
Hey, Sarge. I was just going to sign for
you. Why are you burning it?
296
00:14:29,390 --> 00:14:32,250
Congratulations, Zimmerman. Why are you
burning it? That was the most unselfish
297
00:14:32,250 --> 00:14:34,430
thing I ever heard of, inviting that
girl here for the weekend.
298
00:14:34,650 --> 00:14:35,730
Why are you burning it? Never mind.
299
00:14:36,210 --> 00:14:38,330
And I want you to sign this paper. Sign
what?
300
00:14:38,870 --> 00:14:41,690
It's a pledge that from the moment you
pick up Doberman's sister at the bus
301
00:14:41,690 --> 00:14:44,910
station to the moment that she leaves
this camp, you'll constantly be at her
302
00:14:44,910 --> 00:14:48,290
side. What do you mean? What do you
mean? Never mind. Just sign it. I'm
303
00:14:48,290 --> 00:14:50,810
that you'll take one look at her and...
Sarge, you mean she's...
304
00:14:52,810 --> 00:14:53,810
That bad?
305
00:14:54,510 --> 00:14:56,290
Do you ever see such ugly ashes?
306
00:14:58,250 --> 00:14:59,670
Here, sign the paper.
307
00:15:00,430 --> 00:15:01,570
I'll sign nothing.
308
00:15:01,870 --> 00:15:03,390
Be a man. It's only for the weekend.
309
00:15:03,630 --> 00:15:05,350
You'll get over it. You take her out.
310
00:15:05,610 --> 00:15:06,610
No. Please.
311
00:15:07,450 --> 00:15:08,570
Please, Zimmerman. Please.
312
00:15:08,810 --> 00:15:10,570
Please. Well, well.
313
00:15:11,030 --> 00:15:12,030
Diana's mine.
314
00:15:12,150 --> 00:15:13,630
Yeah, but Sarge, you've got a date with
Joan.
315
00:15:13,890 --> 00:15:16,630
A date? I'll get right on her. Take a
wire. Right, Sarge.
316
00:15:16,910 --> 00:15:19,070
Sergeant Ernest, Bill, go care of
administration. Wait, wait, wait.
317
00:15:19,570 --> 00:15:20,710
You're sending a wire to yourself?
318
00:15:20,930 --> 00:15:23,710
Yeah, but I'm sending it through
administration to make sure that Joan
319
00:15:23,710 --> 00:15:29,110
wire. Now, let me see. Say, your aunt
has been... What's a good name for aunt?
320
00:15:29,290 --> 00:15:30,089
Aunt Agnes?
321
00:15:30,090 --> 00:15:31,090
Yeah.
322
00:15:32,930 --> 00:15:36,390
Your aunt, Agnes, has been stricken with
muscleman's fever.
323
00:15:36,650 --> 00:15:37,650
Come at once.
324
00:15:38,050 --> 00:15:39,090
Signed, Dr.
325
00:15:39,390 --> 00:15:40,730
Hesselman. My Aunt Agnes.
326
00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:44,340
I'm so sorry I had to be the one to show
it to you.
327
00:15:44,740 --> 00:15:46,340
Musselman's fever struck her again.
328
00:15:46,800 --> 00:15:49,240
I have an emergency furlough all ready
for you.
329
00:15:49,660 --> 00:15:52,080
Furlough? No, I've got to take you to
the dance.
330
00:15:52,360 --> 00:15:56,340
Honey, she's crying for you. Oh, you
know how at 96 they shake these things
331
00:15:56,400 --> 00:15:57,880
No, no. Take a wire.
332
00:15:58,180 --> 00:16:01,320
Dr. Hesselman, I cannot come. Darling,
darling, it's only a dance.
333
00:16:01,720 --> 00:16:05,200
No, I've got to think of myself once.
Every moment away from you is torture.
334
00:16:05,200 --> 00:16:08,040
nonsense. I'll get this thing started.
No, I won't. I won't. Really.
335
00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:11,820
Is that two S's in Hasselman? Oh, shut
up.
336
00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:15,240
Did you hear from Doberman yet? Yeah,
you're supposed to pick up a sister at
337
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:16,540
bus terminal at 8 o 'clock.
338
00:16:16,760 --> 00:16:19,120
Right. Now, did you reserve a suite for
her at the hotel?
339
00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:23,440
Yeah, it was tough, but... What do you
think I got lined up? A little gypsy
340
00:16:23,440 --> 00:16:27,380
that I know about. I've been saving it
for a spot like this. May I say, the
341
00:16:27,380 --> 00:16:29,280
charters will be swirling tonight.
342
00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:34,140
No, no, no, I won't go. No, no.
343
00:16:35,580 --> 00:16:37,960
All right, now, you got everything
straight. Now, let me see.
344
00:16:38,330 --> 00:16:42,730
As you bring the girl in, we lower the
lights and we light the candles.
345
00:16:42,950 --> 00:16:43,789
Fine, and you?
346
00:16:43,790 --> 00:16:47,310
And then we play Gypsy Hearts are
Flaming. No, no, no, not yet. This is
347
00:16:47,310 --> 00:16:50,230
she just comes in. Oh, my little Gypsy
sweetheart. My little Gypsy sweetheart.
348
00:16:50,310 --> 00:16:55,390
Then I bring in the food. Yes, but how
do we bring in the food?
349
00:16:56,270 --> 00:16:59,950
Quietly and discreetly. Uh -huh. All
right, that's okay. Now, with the food.
350
00:17:00,190 --> 00:17:03,130
Gypsy Hearts are Flaming. This is the
food.
351
00:17:03,390 --> 00:17:05,730
Eat, Gypsy, eat. That's better. Now it's
very simple.
352
00:17:06,510 --> 00:17:10,010
After we finish our food, Slowly we'll
be sipping on the champagne.
353
00:17:10,310 --> 00:17:15,310
And as the candlelight starts to dim...
That's when I move to the table. Right,
354
00:17:15,369 --> 00:17:17,250
and then play like you've never played
before.
355
00:17:17,470 --> 00:17:19,910
Be sure you play in her left ear. Make
sure.
356
00:17:20,130 --> 00:17:21,750
Because I'll be nibbling on the right
ear.
357
00:17:23,530 --> 00:17:24,530
You're Hungarian?
358
00:17:24,690 --> 00:17:29,170
You feel these things? Give me some
music that talks. Talks for something
359
00:17:29,170 --> 00:17:31,970
smolders into a flame. You know,
something... Hi,
360
00:17:32,670 --> 00:17:33,670
Dad.
361
00:17:33,950 --> 00:17:34,950
Hi, Sid.
362
00:17:36,780 --> 00:17:38,700
Stacks, my sister Sabrina. How do you
like it?
363
00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:40,780
Well, let's go, huh, folks?
364
00:17:42,900 --> 00:17:43,900
Well?
365
00:17:44,120 --> 00:17:46,300
That muscleman's law really works. Yeah.
366
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:47,500
What do you mean?
367
00:17:59,690 --> 00:18:01,450
You sure she's on this bus? I'm
positive.
368
00:18:01,670 --> 00:18:04,310
Doberman phone. She's probably checking
her luggage. See if you can find her.
369
00:18:04,390 --> 00:18:05,490
Tell her I'm out here. Right, Sergeant.
370
00:18:16,330 --> 00:18:17,330
Sergeant Bilko.
371
00:18:17,810 --> 00:18:22,870
Diane. Joan, you came to see me.
Goodbye, Joan. I thought I'd find you
372
00:18:22,870 --> 00:18:24,630
don't understand. I missed the plane, so
I'm taking the bus.
373
00:18:25,550 --> 00:18:28,610
checking up on you. You don't have an
Aunt Agnes, and Henshaw sent that
374
00:18:28,610 --> 00:18:29,870
telegram. Henshaw!
375
00:18:30,250 --> 00:18:33,210
Him with his pack of little jokes. He's
so naughty. Oh, you be quiet.
376
00:18:33,490 --> 00:18:36,450
You're waiting here for a girl, and I
dare you to deny that one.
377
00:18:36,770 --> 00:18:39,530
Now, Joan, you've got to understand
this. I'm like a man possessed. I've got
378
00:18:39,530 --> 00:18:41,730
go through this, or I'll never know for
the rest of my life. Please try to
379
00:18:41,730 --> 00:18:45,150
understand, Joan. All I know is that you
threw me over for some other girl.
380
00:18:45,370 --> 00:18:47,790
Joan, please. Just because you found
somebody more beautiful.
381
00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:20,440
pictured you.
382
00:19:20,820 --> 00:19:21,820
So are you.
383
00:19:23,840 --> 00:19:27,460
Oh, Ben Duane told you we were twins.
384
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:28,880
It figures.
385
00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:32,960
Well, maybe you ought to go to the hotel
so you can freshen up.
386
00:19:33,460 --> 00:19:35,000
You can freshen up.
387
00:19:36,180 --> 00:19:42,840
You must be a long bus driver. Maybe
you're... Joan, this is Diane Doberman,
388
00:19:42,860 --> 00:19:46,440
Duane's sister. This is Joan Hogan. How
do you do, Diane?
389
00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:48,440
How do you do, Joan?
390
00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:52,340
but I have some business to talk over
with you.
391
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:54,999
What's that for?
392
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:57,560
That's the sweetest, kindest thing you
ever did.
393
00:19:57,840 --> 00:20:00,580
What are you talking about? Nobody
wanted to take Doberman's sister.
394
00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:06,140
So rather than break Doberman's heart,
you... Well, John, I ought to tell you.
395
00:20:07,460 --> 00:20:12,640
I have the most wonderful idea. Why
don't you two join Private Zimmerman and
396
00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:14,040
and we'll all have a lot of fun.
397
00:20:26,250 --> 00:20:27,250
restaurant in town.
398
00:20:27,630 --> 00:20:31,670
Gypsy restaurant in this town? Yes. I
never heard of it. Come, my dear, we're
399
00:20:31,670 --> 00:20:32,670
joining the gypsy.
33162
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