Original subtitles

I am here in Shenandoah State Park.

Oh, and that's beautiful.

Wow!

He did that? You're kidding. No, I'm not.

Well, I wouldn't put it in my romantic column, Deb.

Well I don't know. I mean, it's definitely kinky.

Maybe affectionately odd, but

I mean, I don't find anything romantic about having sex with...

I'll call you back later. Okay, bye.

Sex with a what?

None of your business. Another woman?

Go back to your desk, Tony. Another man?

I told you. Some kind of root vegetable?

You're disgusting.

Wasn't me having a conversation about kinky sex, Kate.

It was a private conversation, Tony,

something you seem to have a difficult time with.

If I'd been having that conversation, you'd accuse me of being a Neanderthal.

Well, that doesn't require a conversation, Tony.

You know what I think, Kate?

I think there's a secret side to you. A Spike Steele video kind of side.

Keep it hidden under your mattress?

Leave now.

You're a Spike Steele fan, aren't you, probie?

What, the porn star? No, the physicist.

No, not really. He looks kind of sleazy.

Actually, he looks a little bit like Tony.

Oh, you have no idea how much he looks like me.

Kate, how do you know what he looks like?

I saw him on the news when he was arrested a few years ago.

Really?

Spike Steele's real name is Jay McMann.

And according to the National Crime Database,

he's never been arrested. Ever.

What are you waiting for, DiNozzo?

Gas the truck. I knew that.

McGee, get Ducky. What am I telling him, boss?

We have a dead Marine in Shenandoah River State Park.

Come on. Let's go.

Sergeant William Moore. Call came in from his wife.

The friend? Sergeant Roger Caine.

All camping together.

This morning they were going to hike this trail.

Sergeant Moore went ahead early to film the sunrise.

When they couldn't find him, they called us.

Early in the morning, it's really slippery up here.

Sergeant lost his traction and slipped.

Are you a trained investigator,

Ranger Kett?

Been working this park five years, Agent Gibbs.

It's as treacherous as it comes up here. Seen a lot of hikers go over.

This hiker was a Marine.

Yeah, well, this Marine slipped and fell to his death.

You said he was filming. That's what his wife said.

No sign of the camera. Me and my team can take it from here.

I wonder what happened to McGee.

Probably passed out on the side of the trail sucking his thumb.

He joined a gym, you know. Is that right?

Wait up!

He should get his money back. Where the hell you been?

Ducky needed some help with his gear. How much further is it?

It's another quarter of a mile. Uphill.

Stamina, probie. It's very important in our profession,

as it is in Spike Steele's profession.

You relate to him, don't you, Tony? Oh, we have a lot in common.

Stamina?

For one.

What are your preliminary findings, Mr. Palmer?

Lacerations, bruises, contusions,

consistent with a fall of this kind.

And?

And I would imagine that the victim

has sustained fractures of several limbs.

Cause of death?

Impossible to say till we get him back, but from the looks of this head wound,

I would say that he probably struck a rock.

Cause of death?

Shock.

That would be my supposition as well.

What I don't get is the flesh trauma.

What kind of wounds are these, Doctor?

They're coyote. They would eat the exposed tissue first.

What's second?

If what I suspect is true,

yeah, the abdominal cavity has been chewed open.

You know, the liver and kidney is a rich source of nutrients for these creatures.

That's gross, Doctor.

Well, actually, Mr. Palmer, we're quite lucky here.

In some cases,

they chew off the head and carry it away,

so they won't have to fight other coyotes for it.

My coroner friend in Los Angeles says coyotes take it "to go."

They're very strange in Los Angeles.

Anything unusual, Duck? No, not really, Jethro.

I'll know more when I get our Marine back on the table.

Boss!

I found the camcorder!

He was obsessed with the stupid camera.

I gave it to him on his birthday.

Maybe if he hadn't been filming, he wouldn't have slipped.

Anybody else at this campsite while you were here?

No, sir. Just the drunk. But he was nothing to worry about.

He was in a trailer over there. Scruffy guy. He was drinking too much.

Got loud. We asked him to keep it down.

He didn't keep it down? No, sir.

So we went over there, tried to reason with him.

That's when he took a swing. You took a swing back.

No, ma'am.

Bill put him in a headlock till he calmed down

and then he just took off.

I don't suppose you got a license number?

No point, sir.

The guy was harmless.

Bill spends eight months in Iraq, and he dies filming a sunrise in Virginia.

That's not the way it works, Gibbs. This thing has been in water for hours.

You don't just spray a little 409 on the tape, and off you go.

Tape? Yeah. It's digital videotape.

I thought everything was a chip these days.

No, they kind of married the old school with the new.

You know, how like new hip-hop artists will go back to old-school rappers

like Sugar Hill Gang.

How long? I have to separate the cartridge,

I have to submerge the wheels in a cleaning solution

with the heads up against it.

I have to remove the silt contaminants so they don't shred the tape.

How long, Abby?

Three, maybe four hours.

Let me know when you got it. Hey, Gibbs, do you have a camcorder?

Yeah. Digital, okay?

Good, Gibbs. Way to go. Did you make the jump to CDs yet?

'Cause if you didn't, it's cool

'cause all the hot DJs, they use vinyl these days anyway.

Just get it to me.

Hey, Gibbs! Gibbs! Gibbs! Gibbs! Gibbs! Gibbs! Gibbs!

Peace out, man.

Indiscriminate predators, coyotes.

Fish, cats, garbage.

They'll eat anything they can chew,

unlike my mother who can no longer chew anything.

I assure you, Mr. Palmer, it is a beastly sight.

Yes, it is, Doctor.

I was speaking of my mother.

Right.

Have you ever seen a rib-eye steak

that's been reduced to baby food by a Cuisinart?

Not recently.

It's remarkably similar to her burritos and her pizzas.

Not to mention the Sunday dinner treat.

Sushi through a straw.

Give me a pair of tweezers, Mr. Palmer.

There's something peculiar here.

What is it, Doctor? I haven't a clue.

That's why you will take it directly up to Abby.

I was thinking, Mr. Palmer. Yes, Doctor.

Perhaps it's about time you came over to the house one evening.

Came over?

Joined us for dinner.

That... That would be great.

Northern White Ash.

Ash trees are not indigenous to this area.

And even if they were,

you know of any that have kiln dried wood and a lacquer coating?

Lacquer? Yep. Clear coat.

Baseball bat.

Wooden bats are made out of either maple or ash.

Ash is more popular, but it tends to splinter more easily.

Especially when they come in contact with somebody's skull.

Somebody did a Barry Bonds on Sergeant Moore's head, Gibbs.

Sergeant William Moore, transferred from Camp Lejeune

to Quantico two months ago. He was serving as an El

for all newly commissioned Marine officers.

El? Enlisted Instructor, probie.

What did he teach, Kate?

Well, according to his records, MOUT.

MOUT stands for military operations... Yes, I know what it stands for, Tony.

Well, excuse me for trying to help junior agents.

Trust me, when I need help, you'll be the first person I ask

where Gibbs or Kate is.

You two done? For the moment.

These are the last two people to have seen our sergeant alive.

His best friend and his wife.

Hey!

Now, I'm done. Continue.

Do you think that one or both of them could have murdered the Sergeant?

Well, it is kind of weird, a single guy hanging out with a married couple.

I agree. Why is that?

Well, because he's a single guy hanging out with married people.

I do that all the time. Yeah, but you bring a date, right?

Not always.

Are you related to them? No.

What?

Well, who usually invites you?

The man or the woman?

I don't know. I guess usually the guy.

Okay, a lot of my friends are from the Secret Service,

and most of them happen to be men.

What about your girlfriend who called yesterday morning?

Well, Deb is married to one of my buddies, Rick.

Okay, so what you're trying to say

is that all of my married male friends secretly wanna sleep with me.

Pretty much, yeah. That's very mature, Tony.

And for your information, men and women can just be friends.

Isn't that right, McGee? Technically.

What do you mean, "technically"?

He means she'd have to be pretty ugly first.

Wait, I didn't say that.

I swear, I do not get paid enough for this.

For what, Kate? Oh, nothing.

We are just discussing potential suspects.

Focusing on the Sergeant's wife and best friend, boss.

Yeah, well, come on. We've got one more.

You guys are four years old, honestly.

Nice hat.

Attractive.

In a weird way.

Why?

Well, I had to set up a clean room in the ballistics lab

to work with the damaged videotape

and just throwing the hats away seemed sort of wasteful,

so I decided to recycle.

What do you think? I think it suits you.

Now what's on the tape?

Oh, I haven't finished cleaning it up yet, but I have a POI.

Person of interest. Let's see it.

The following program has been edited for time and content.

It may not be appropriate... Don't touch me.

For younger viewers. Abby!

Right.

This isn't a good idea, Bill.

Honey, I've asked this guy three times to turn his music down.

Yeah, now we make him.

And if he has a gun or something in there?

I film it and we get the redneck arrested.

Way to encourage him, Roger.

Oh, come on, honey.

It's not that big of a deal. We'll be right back.

Okay, this next part is like an outtake from Deliverance.

I thought I told you guys to leave me the hell alone.

Sir, we will, once you turn the music down.

What? Do you think I'm afraid of you or something?

Sir, I'm not here to fight you. We just want you to lower the music.

Hey, hey. Hey!

I'I kill you! I'll kill you!

No, what you just did, is you just assaulted me on camera, huh? See?

Either you leave, or we're going to call the cops.

All right. Just let me go.

Huh? All right.

We need to ID this guy. Oh, I'm way ahead of you, Gibbs.

I got a shot of the license plate. It is registered to a David Runion.

His last address is an RV campground in Manassas.

He's since moved. Find him. That's good work, Abby.

Tony, head back to Shenandoah State Park.

Take McGee. For what exactly, boss?

I want to know where the Sergeant was killed

before he was tossed off that cliff.

Get the sedan ready, probie. I'll meet you out front.

So, Kate, you really like my hat?

It's different. Cool, because I made you one.

Abby, I don't know what to say.

Put it on!

Okay.

She bet me $20 that she could make you wear that today.

Your cut.

Pleasure doing business with you, Abs.

Totally.

Hurry it up, McGee. I mean, you could have helped.

I did. I carried the camera.

Moore was a Marine, combat veteran.

Probably not the easiest guy in the world to sneak up on.

Unless he knew his attacker. Or was ambushed.

It's a pretty wide-open space. Let's check out the tree line.

Blood drop. Sure looks like it.

Okay, we're going to have to search in there.

You're going to want to watch out for...

Yes, I know how to search a wooded area, Tony.

I'm not an idiot. I didn't say you were.

Then why do you always treat me like one?

Just trying to impart a little wisdom, McGee.

Look, I graduated top of my class at FLETC.

So I think I can handle it.

Be my guest. Give me a call if you find anything.

I will.

I found David Runion, Gibbs.

He checked into another campground

20 miles from Shenandoah State Park.

Also ran a background check on him. He's served time.

For what? Assault and battery.

Nearly beat a man to death with a pool cue in '93.

Looks like this time he might have succeeded.

We getting a warrant? We need evidence for a warrant, Kate.

Right now, I just wanna talk to him.

Tony, found it!

Not bad.

Not bad at all, McGee. Thanks.

Hey, I'm sorry about back there.

Don't mention it.

Besides, that's a pretty brave thing to do.

What do you mean brave?

Well, crawling around back here in all this poison ivy.

I don't know if I would have done it.

You're kidding, right?

"Leaves of three, let them be," McGee.

A little something I picked up during my first year.

Don't touch me, by the way.

Is that a rat or a dog?

Hey, buddy.

Hi.

Oh, sorry.

I wouldn't do that if I were you, Gibbs.

One day you're going to have to tell me how you do that.

Easy. They can sense sarcasm.

Runion!

Special Agents Gibbs and Todd! NCIS!

I'd like to ask you a few questions.

Clear.

What do you think? The word "disgusting" comes to mind.

You smell that? If you're referring to the urine, yes.

No, I meant this.

Marijuana? Yeah, it's recent, too.

Well, it's enough to bring him in and hold him for a while.

Oh, yeah.

Runion! Federal agents! Stop!

Idiots.

Put your hands behind your head.

How did you...

Sneak up on you like that? Yeah.

Used to do it for a living.

Back then, you'd be dead instead of under arrest.

Any other questions?

Uh-uh.

Didn't think so.

I know you can hear me out there.

I'm telling you for the last time. I gotta use the bathroom.

Okay, have it your way. It won't be the first time I had to do this.

Maybe we should. He's bluffing.

Tony, you didn't see the inside of his camper.

That bad, huh?

Picture the most disgusting public restroom you've ever been in,

covered in pus and vomit.

I would still rather live there than this guy's place.

That's nice, Kate.

You should thank me. Eating that crap will kill you.

I'm more concerned about what Gibbs will do if this redneck

takes one in our interrogation room.

I gotta use the bathroom.

Hold it. I can't.

Good, we can do this quick.

Why'd you murder Sergeant William Moore?

What? Who the hell is that?

That's right, you probably don't recall his name.

Sir, I'm not here to fight you. We just want you to lower the music.

Hey, hey. Hey!

I'll kill you!

What you just did, is you just assaulted...

He was found yesterday lying at the bottom of a cliff.

Is that what this is all about? You think I killed some jarhead.

No way, man. Nice try.

Why'd you run? 'Cause of the pot in my trailer.

I got a medical condition.

What? Stupidity?

Oh, look, man. I was really drunk that night.

I barely even remember the guy. I sure as hell didn't kill him.

Where were you yesterday between 5:30 and 7:30 a.m.?

Sleeping.

Yeah, at the rest stop off 211.

I didn't even wake up until after 10:00.

Withesses? Well, sure.

I mean, there were lots of other cars and trucks when I pulled in.

I need names.

I don't have any names.

There are two rest stops on that road, Tony.

Check if they have any video surveillance or attendants.

On it.

Running it, boss.

So what happens now?

You've got a violent past, your alibi is weak,

and I've got you on tape threatening the victim.

You tell me, Runion.

Man, my whole life.

It's always been like this.

One freaking nightmare after another.

But I swear to you, Agent Gibbs,

I didn't kill anybody.

We found your bat.

What bat?

Hey, Abby. You got something?

Well, I've got good news and bad news.

This is definitely our bat.

The splinter from Sergeant Moore's head fits perfectly.

Bad news? It's been wiped clean of any prints.

The only thing on it is urushiol oil.

That's the stuff found in...

What?

You...

You have to see this for yourself.

This is going to hurt, isn't it? Yes.

I look like a circus freak! Abby, what do I do?

Well, you could use calamine lotion.

Or perhaps just wear some sort of mask.

And can you mark it Special Agent Todd?

Thanks, Sheriff Lester.

Dinner? Aren't you married?

Well, it does to me.

My mother wonders why I'm not married.

So does mine.

Could you stop doing that?

I'm practicing, Kate. What? Annoying me?

No, the creepy way Gibbs used to sneak up on us.

What do you mean used to?

The old man's been wearing Bengay lately.

I can smell him coming a mile away.

Is that a fact, DiNozzo?

Knee feeling better, boss?

Much. Great.

What about Runion's alibi?

I've got the local sheriff pulling the security tapes

from the rest stops on Route 211.

And we have a description of his pickup and trailer

circulating with the state cops who worked the area that night.

Do you think he did it, Gibbs? Oh, yeah.

And Tony is cleaning it up.

Janitorial. Yes, sir.

Don't worry about interrogation.

DiNozzo is gonna handle it.

You still here?

Are you serious? You're serious?

In my defense, I did use the word "creepy"

in the most affectionate way.

Right.

You might want to use gloves.

Where's McGee?

Oh, let's see what we're dealing with here, Timothy.

The dreaded Toxicodendron radicans.

The Poison Ivy plant.

Yeah, you seem to be particularly allergic to it.

Usually it takes several days for this sort of reaction to develop.

I'm lucky that way.

Last time I encountered a case of this magnitude,

two young lovers fell asleep naked in a field of it.

I don't think Sarah has ever forgiven me for that one.

What I don't understand is, how did I get it all over my face?

It's the urushiol oil in the plant.

Yes, once it gets on your hands it spreads by contact.

Then I have a major problem, Ducky.

When I was out there, I... I had to, you know...

No, I don't.

Relieve myself.

Well, let's take a look then.

This is kind of embarrassing. I'm a doctor, McGee.

I have seen everything there is to see more times than I care to remember.

Good Lord.

What? Is it bad?

No, no it's fine. Fine. Nothing to worry about.

I didn't expect to see

quite so much swelling.

If Tony finds out about this, I'm going to have to quit.

Well, your secret is safe with me.

Doctor, I've got the new inspection forms you...

I'll come back.

Him, I'm not so sure about.

Runion's trailer pulled into the rest stop

around 1:00 a.m. that morning, Gibbs.

With a little image enhancement...

Runion. I can almost smell him from here.

How long did he stay?

All night.

Distance from Shenandoah River State Park?

It's about two miles, boss.

Well, I guess he was telling the truth.

We're going to have to find a new suspect.

Yeah, Gibbs.

Maybe not. Come on.

How you feeling?

Like an idiot. Tony tried to warn me. I didn't listen.

Oh, don't feel bad.

The same thing happened to him the first year he was here.

Really?

Not quite this spectacularly, but yeah.

So honestly, how do I look?

Do you want the truth, or do you want me to lie to you

to ease the burden of your own self-loathing?

I prefer the lie.

Me, too. You're the fairest in the land, McGee.

Okay, what do you got for me, Abs?

It looks worse than it is.

I'm not so sure about that.

She means you look like the Elephant Man, probie.

Tony. It's true.

Can you still work, McGee?

Yeah. Sure, boss.

Okay.

What do you got for me, Abby?

I cleaned up more of the Sergeant's videotape.

I need to see the last thing he shot.

Unfortunately that's the part that received the most damage from the impact.

It was in contact with the heads and a lot of the data got...

When?

I sent it to the naval photo lab

and hopefully you're gonna have it back by tomorrow.

Well, what am I doing here, Abby?

Because of this.

This is from the beginning of the tape.

It's mostly them setting up camp and checking out the area.

And then, there is this.

It looks like the widow and the best friend

don't know they're being videotaped.

And on the next shot...

Honey, what's wrong?

Still think men and women can just be friends, Kate?

I can't be sure, Gibbs.

According to Gloria, lip-reading was never my strong suit.

Gloria, her deaf sister? Mother.

I think Judy Moore is saying,

"We have to something blank him."

Kill? No.

Murder? Nope.

Love? No.

I really wish you'd stop doing that. I will, Tony, once you stop blanking up.

Okay, Abby, could you pull the video back wider?

You see how she's touching his face? I mean, it's very intimate.

Clearly there's more than a friendship going on here.

Which just goes to prove my point about the sexes, Kate.

DiNozzo, you pick up Sergeant Caine in the morning.

Kate, you pick up Judy Moore, don't tell her why.

Looks like we're going to play Gibbs' favorite game.

Musical interrogation rooms.

People are staring at me.

Of course. You're hideously disfigured, probie.

If you'd listened to me, you wouldn't be in this mess.

If I'd listened to you, Gibbs would have fired me six months ago.

You were going to whack me, but you stopped. Why?

I remember what it was like being the new guy,

trying to fit in, never make mistakes, of course, the obvious.

You like me?

No, it would be like touching a leper.

Ladies and gentlemen, this way, please.

My favorite part of the tour, the Marine Corps sniper.

One of the most feared warriors in the world.

After a brief demonstration...

Corporal Cameron will be happy to answer

any questions you may have.

I'll meet you by the command center when he's done.

Ladies and gentlemen, you'll notice that our sniper...

Any more information about Sergeant Moore's accident, sir?

Sure. Except it wasn't an accident.

Murder, Sergeant Caine.

Murder? How?

Baseball bat to the head. Fifty-foot fall from a cliff.

Coyotes probably didn't help.

That redneck must have overheard Bill saying

he was gonna film up there in the morning.

We got to find him. We did.

You need me to ID him? No. We do want to know what happened

when Sergeant Moore found out you were sleeping with his wife.

She told you that?

No, he did.

Didn't know he was videotaping you, did you?

It's not what you think.

Oh, so you weren't sleeping with her?

You're under arrest, Sergeant. For what?

We'll start with adultery and work our way up from there.

I don't mean to be rude, but couldn't you have

just sent me my husband's personal effects, Agent Todd?

Well, normally we would have,

but that camera you bought him was pretty expensive.

It still works?

Yeah. In a way.

Water? Thank you.

So Mrs. Moore, tell us about your husband.

What kind of a man was he?

Loving, gentle.

What about jealous?

Where do you want him, boss? Interrogation 1.

Roger? Judy, what the hell did you tell them?

No talking, Marine! What is going on here?

That's what you're going to tell me, Mrs. Moore.

Take her to Interrogation Room 2.

Yeah, Gibbs. Even more is coming through...

I'll read you your rights on the way.

Did you get the last shot from my tape?

I'm just working on it now, Gibbs.

It's kind of like a nature documentary

but with a riveting murder mystery subplot.

This is where it gets interesting.

He slipped and fell?

In the original version.

But this movie comes with an alternate ending.

In slo-mo, right when the camera slams to the ground...

The killer recorded over it.

The impact caused the heads to lose contact with the tape,

preserving two frames from the original recording.

I've been working on cleaning them up. Any way to recover the rest?

Well, since all recordings leave a magnetic impression,

much like a computer hard drive, by the way,

if I scan the data, then I'll be able to separate out...

When?

You don't have to take the fun out of everything, Gibbs.

A few hours.

That's a good job, Abby. You have 20 minutes.

Gibbs! Get McGee to help you!

As disturbing as this sounds,

I think you may have a point about the sexes, Tony.

It's Biology 101.

Would you say I'm attractive? Sure.

Then how come you've never...

I know you.

Is something wrong with your arm, Sergeant?

Picked up some poison ivy in the field last week, sir.

Is that a fact?

I didn't murder anyone, sir.

Yeah, well, we'll get to that part.

How long were you and Sergeant Moore friends?

Since boot camp, sir.

Parris Island or San Diego?

San Diego, sir.

Right. A Hollywood Marine.

So how long after that did you start screwing his wife?

I don't understand, Agent Gibbs.

Why am I in here?

Don't you want to know who murdered your husband, Mrs. Moore?

Yes, but I know it wasn't Roger. He wouldn't.

There's no way.

Why's that?

Because...

he was with me that morning.

By "with me," you mean in the same sleeping bag?

She actually said that?

No way, sir.

Why would she lie?

I mean, besides protecting you, Sergeant.

She's insane.

Look, right after Sergeant Moore went to film the sunrise,

I went down to the campground showers.

I was gone for about an hour.

So she was there when you got back?

Yes, sir. She was making breakfast.

So what you're saying is, she had about an hour to kill him?

I didn't say that.

My mistake.

You're saying you had about an hour to kill him.

There's no way Roger would say that.

Agent Todd.

Play it back.

I almost feel sorry for these two.

Why would she lie?

She's insane.

So what you're saying is, she had about an hour to kill him?

Let me guess. You thought he loved you.

When Bill was in Iraq,

Roger and I...

We grew close.

What now, boss?

Put them both in the same room.

Gonna need a refill for this.

We fooled around a few times, Judy. It was a stupid mistake.

You said you loved me.

Are you nuts? Bill was my best friend.

It should never have happened.

Then why did you kill him, if it wasn't to be with me?

Stop saying that, you crazy...

I didn't kill him! She's making it up!

I'm pregnant, Roger. It's yours.

Well, this is better than cable.

The question is, which one's telling the truth?

Okay. Ready to try again, McGee?

Play it.

Oh, and that's beautiful.

I just need to adjust the read heads off track a little more.

Is that you, Roger?

His trailer never left the rest stop?

But Runion did.

Abby inverted the image and at 0900,

you can just make out his shadow underneath the trailer

as he's coming back.

It was only a four-mile round trip on foot.

Thanks, Sheriff.

Runion posted bail for the pot charge an hour ago.

Let's roll.

What about Sergeant Caine and Mrs. Moore?

Let them suffer for a while.

I think Sergeant Moore would appreciate that.

Get back in the truck, you miserable little piece of crap.

Put down your weapon, Runion!

You're not getting out of here alive!

I ain't going back to prison, Gibbs! You hear me?

I'd say we're outgunned, boss.

I'll circle around back. I've got a better idea.

You might wanna cover your ears.

I think you got him, boss.

Well, what are we gonna do with this thing?

No way, Gibbs.

I'll take him. I always wanted a dog.

Oh, good dog!

I think I'll call you Tony.

It's a bitch, Kate.

I know.

Is it just me or do you think Tony likes me?

I think it's more than obvious Tony likes you.

Not my usual type, but kind of cute.

More like adorable. Maybe we could share Tony.

What's wrong? Oh, nothing.

Good doggie. You can come out now, DiNozzo.

Yeah, I'll just... I'll take care of that. Thank you.

Hey. Did you bring the dog food?

Yeah, they didn't have any bowls.

That's okay. We got it covered.

Got a present for you, Little Tony.

Good idea. Now we can tell the two of them apart.

At least I don't hang out with married people, Kate.

Will you please tell him

that men and women can just be friends?

Absolutely they can.

Without having sex?

Oh, no. They'll have sex.

Abby!

What, Kate? You've never slept with a friend?

What is wrong with you people?

Good question, Kate.

What did you do to the dog?

Just taking care of her. Unless you want to.

Here you go, girl.

Wow.

She even eats like you, Tony.

Did anybody see my ball cap?

No. No.

'Cause I... I could have sworn I left it right on my desk.