Original subtitles

Good night, sweet heart.

All my prayers are for you. Good night, sweet

heart. I'll be watching over you.

Tears and cutting may make us alone.

But with the garden, a new day...

I thought you might be the repo men.

Repo as in repossession?

No, repo as in repose. They're a wandering troop of performance artists

round and rest decorously on your furniture.

Everything repossessed? Everything.

This is about the only thing in this flat that I actually own outright.

Consequence of my playboy lifestyle.

You have a playboy lifestyle?

I'm out every night.

Well, every other night.

Most Thursdays.

Crazy merry -go -round like that. The wheel was bound to come off.

Yeah, well, sad as it may seem, what with the rent on this place and all my

other outgoings, it was still more than I could afford.

Look, you don't get into this state without warnings. There must have been

letters. I endured that bit getting mail when it wasn't my birthday.

You need to do something.

I can't make people be my friend.

I mean about your financial position.

Yeah, well, I've got an appointment with the bank manager tomorrow.

to go and see if he'll extend my overdraft. Will you stop fidgeting?

I'm sorry.

I'm still a bit hyper over, well, you know... Your trip to France.

Trip to France?

You make it sound like a fag and booze run to Calais.

I stood and fought shoulder to shoulder with the French resistance.

I was grabbed by the Nazis. I was interrogated by the Gestapo. I was shot

And if I have to hear about it one more time, I'll grab you by the Nazis and

dangle you out of a window.

Yeah. Sorry, I've gone on a bit, haven't I? 50 or 60 times.

Look, in all honesty, I wish I could stop talking about it, but it gave me

a buzz I can't come down again.

I'm never relaxed. I'm not sleeping properly. I'm totally wired.

Thank you.

Now I have nothing.

Look, why don't you go home, try and relax, get some sleep, listen to

boring, tune in to Radio 2.

Actually, I thought if I could talk through the whole French experience with

you, which I appreciate will be for the 61st time, it might help me, you know,

draw a line under it.

Come on, you're the only person on this side of VE Day, I can tell.

OK, I'll do it.

Providing that afterwards you do me a favour.

Sitting here, dreading every knock on the door has got me thinking about the

mess I've made of my life.

Losing my business, my marriage, everything.

I think if I could spend three or four hours sharing with you the bitterness

pent -up resentment still raging inside of me, then... Um, well, yeah, yeah,

fair enough. You're going to listen to my problems. It's only fair I should be

burdened with yours. So, we'll make a date to do that, then. I thought you

wanted to do it now.

No. I mean, you know, I'd love to, but I thought I'd just do what you suggested.

Go home, try the bed radio thing, just take it easy.

Maybe we could make a date for later in the week.

That's a definite...

Possibility.

Would you like a nice cup of tea?

Oh, please.

Drink it while it's hot.

Thank God, it's just a dream.

Are you OK?

Yeah,

I just had a sort of nightmare thing.

I'll get it.

Don't just stand there. Give us a hand.

Oh, look.

Ivor Novello's popped in again.

I heard of that.

What are you listening to?

Latest on the D -Day landing.

The invasion's still touch and go.

Monty's stalled. That's our call. Really?

Never mind.

Look, have we got any aspirin? I've got a terrible headache.

What's the matter with you? This could be the most important moment of the war

and you're more worried about a little headache.

No.

I've got a rash on my foot as well and my back hurts a bit.

You're so self -centred.

Look, it's D -Day this and D -Day that every time you turn on the radio or open

a paper.

To be quite frank, I think I've OD'd on D -Day.

You've done what?

There's no point in getting excited. The invasion's going to take ages.

My sergeant said the war will all be over in six weeks.

Your sergeant also said that France would never fall, no bomb would ever be

dropped on London, and Brendan Trumpet would be a bigger movie star than David

Niven. Brendan, it... Well, that's my point.

Sorry. Sorry, I didn't mean to think that. I'm just a bit tired.

You know, I thought I was having trouble relaxing. That seems to be affecting my

sleep now as well. I keep having these dreams.

What sort of dreams?

Oh, I'd rather not say.

No.

What sort of dreams?

Nightmares. What about?

I can't say.

You spies.

Even your dreams are secret.

Not another doodle bug. These are the things that are giving me flipping

nightmares. Don't worry, I keep telling you, we're perfectly safe here. How do

you know? Because they didn't target... Because they're not targeting this part

of the West End.

There you are, see?

I really like that droning sound. They make it really great.

Drone, drone, drone, drone, drone, drone, drone, drone. Reg.

Drone, drone, drone, drone. Reg. I've got a headache.

Drone, drone.

it going off.

Vicious things.

One of them even blew up His Majesty's tennis court, you know. When will the

sacrifices end?

Shows you just how evil them Nazis are, thinking up a weapon like that.

Well, true, yeah, but looking at it purely as a piece of technology, you've

to admire the ingenuity.

How can you say that?

No, I'm not condoning them. I'm just being objective, you know. A pilotless

is a hell of a step forward.

Now just think where that technology may lead us.

Men on the moon, space stations, rockets to Mars.

I'll get you that aspirin.

The thing I can't work out is, if I haven't got a pilot, how do they get to

where they're going?

Well, they're powered by a pulse jet engine, and the guidance system is

basically a gyroscopic autopilot. Now, that detects variation in flight

direction and flight level.

Then, using a basic time, speed and distance calculation, they can work out

exactly how much fuel to... They aim it at London and fire it out of a great big

catapult.

Gotcha. They must use an enormous bit of elastic.

Well, it mustn't.

Well, I can't sit around here gassing all day.

Thanks for the joint, Gary. My Margie be really chuffed. She's mad on beef.

Well, we'll all be one day.

Nice to listen to the wireless again. I do miss ours.

Why, what happened to yours?

Well, little Frankie was asking how they worked. Well, you know what six -year

-olds are like. So I had to back off, took it all apart, showed them all the

and outs.

Only when I come to put it all back together again, there appear to be more

than ins.

You'd have been better off leaving it to little Frankie.

He's a bit busy mending a mangle I broke.

Chewy bite.

Will you be wanting any breakfast?

Um, no, I don't think I could face it.

Look, I'll get washed and dressed in a minute. I'm just going to shut my eyes

for a bit.

Four miles ago I rang and asked you to come straight round. Sorry, sorry, I've

had problems like you wouldn't.

Wow.

You have been repoed? And then some.

Nothing I could do about it. The bank gave me the thumbs down on the loan.

you like a coffee? They're not turning the water off till four.

Please.

Could they have been through this place like a swarm of locusts?

Didn't you even try and stop them?

Of course I did.

You just stood there and whimpered, didn't you?

Like a whipped spaniel.

I did manage to hide my gold cufflinks once that Stella got me for our second

wedding anniversary.

They wouldn't have dared look for them without surgical gloves.

You don't have so much bother. You despise Stella.

I like her cufflinks. They're 18 carat.

I'm sorry I'm boring you.

Oh, sorry.

Things have been going from bad to worse for me.

I'm still really strung out and I've started having these bad dreams now.

sort of bad dreams?

On the way over here, I dozed off and dreamt I was in bed with Phoebe and

at the same time.

Well, that's not a bad dream. I should know. I've had that.

You dreamt about sleeping with my wives?

It was one night after a particularly ripe gorgonzola. No, no.

You know, you should see a therapist.

I should?

It's good of you to see me at such short notice, Doctor.

That's quite all right.

Just make yourself comfortable, Mr Sparrow.

And in your own time, start to tell me what the problem is.

Right.

Well, I think the main problem are these dreams I keep having.

Dreams? Yeah.

Only I suspect they're a symptom rather than the cause of the problem.

And do you have any idea what the cause may be?

Well, I... I, um... I had this adventure

recently, and I think that's... Oh,

my God, you want me, don't you?

I'm on fire for you, Mr Sparrow.

Why did you wake me up? Why did you wake me up?

I had to put the kettle on, and when I came back, you were slumped in the chair

sweating, so I thought you were having one of your nightmares.

Of course I was sweating.

I was about to be taken advantage of by a gorgeous therapist.

Sit down, close your eyes, and for God's sake, try and relax. Right.

All right,

I'm

back.

So, where were we?

I think I was doing this.

Yep, yep, that's exactly where we were.

Don't worry, girl.

I'll be gentle with you.

No!

Why didn't you wake me up? Why didn't you wake me up? I came in to see if you

wanted sugar in your coffee, saw you thrashing about in the chair and thought

you were at it with your therapist.

Thank you. If Reg Steadman was what I was doing, then he can be very

If you carry on like this, you're going to go round the twist.

The only way you're going to get the French experience out of your system and

stop having these dreams is to get some serious rest and relaxation.

You know, you're right.

I need to be selfish. Put me first for a change.

It can't hurt just this once.

Maybe you should think about a holiday.

Good idea.

Look, I need to talk to you.

You see, it's not only my stuff they're taking. I'm going to lose the flat as

well. Oh, no.

I didn't realise.

Well, surely you can afford some tacky little bedsit, perhaps, yeah.

But why should I when I've got a mate with a West End flat?

Who?

Me?

Duh. I own that flat in 1944.

You bought it in 1944, but did you ever sell it?

Well, how do I know what I did 50 -odd years ago?

Hasn't happened yet.

So you could still own it?

Well, yeah, I suppose.

Look, I can't think about this now. I'm screwed up enough.

You don't have to worry about it. I'll do all the necessary investigations.

But if it pans out, I can move in, yeah?

I don't know.

If I do still own it, that's a prime piece of real estate.

So? So, it could be bringing in quite a substantial rent.

And where did you get the money to buy the flat?

Well, with the white fibres that you've printed.

Feeling any better?

Not brilliant.

I'll make you some breakfast.

What do you fancy?

Do you have any kippers?

I just fancy a kipper.

It's coming up.

Are you

okay in there, love?

Fine, thank you, darling.

Do you need a hand?

No, thank you.

I love it!

I love it!

That's my breakfast!

Oh, God.

I'm never sleeping again.

I love it.

I love it.

Why do you keep looking at me like that?

If it's all right with you, I'll move my stuff in straight away.

There, I'm in.

I'm flat in the middle of Mayfair.

This is going to change my life. The birds are going to be all over me.

I thought I was the one supposed to be having the dreams.

God, this is so weird, being here with you.

What was that for?

Just in case you thought you were having one of your nightmares.

Just a second.

Where's the fun in that?

Are you sure I still own this place?

The man from the management company, he'd say definitely.

Well, what about rates, maintenance charges?

Settled annually from an investment fund you set up.

God, I think of everything, don't I?

You know, I cannot get over how weird this feels.

I mean, literally, two hours ago, I was stood on this very spot, and it was

19...

What's the matter? You've gone pale.

I've just realised.

I must be mad letting you bring me here.

What if I'd walked in and found a 90 -year -old me still living here?

Dribbling soup and filling his incontinence packs.

The shock would have killed both of me. I already checked with the caretaker.

Did I die here?

I don't know. I haven't checked all the wardrobes yet.

Oh, even your scrawny remains wouldn't fit in there.

That's what I could find here.

This whole flat is a potential minefield for me. There could be all sorts of

clues about what I did in the past.

We could find a programme from the 1966 World Cup final, autographed to their

mate Gary by the brothers Charlton.

Or I could find an indication of something truly terrible.

Ron, what if I'm Paula Yates's dad?

Now you're being paranoid.

Look! It's empty. The whole flat is empty.

There's none of yours or Phoebe's personal effects anywhere.

Don't you think that's a bit eerie?

Not really, when you think about it.

The last time you left this flat, you'd have known you were coming here today.

Because to the you in the past, today would have already happened.

So it makes perfect sense that you would have removed all indications to your

future in the past.

Does time travel have to be so complicated?

Look.

I bought you these.

Sleeping tablets.

I used them when I was going through my divorce.

Whenever Stella started ranting, I just took one. There was no pain.

No, I'm not sleeping. Got too scary.

You can't go without sleep, Gary.

Look, I managed to do fine for the last 36 hours, haven't I?

You OK?

Yeah.

You just went out of focus for a second.

Not sleeping is just going to make things worse.

You've got to relax.

The dreams themselves are just a red herring.

Just what is it with you and fish?

Nothing.

Look, I've got some malt whiskey in my bag.

Why don't we just sit here and have a drop of that, eh?

Yeah, all right.

Just a small one, OK?

I'm finding it hard enough to hang on to reality as it is. Oh, you just need

something to steady your nerves.

Cheers.

Cheers.

What's the matter?

Bit of a funny aftertaste. Oh, that'll be the sleeping tablet I slipped into

Ron! You'll thank me for it.

I must stay awake.

I must stay awake. I must stay awake.

I must stay awake.

Oh, my God, I'm not awake.

Welcome to your nightmare.

No, no, not if I don't get involved.

This is my dream and I'm not playing.

Pathetic. This is all you're doing.

I thought I was giving him a bit of backbone before you came along and

mollycoddling him. Well, at least I care about him. All you're interested in is

your career.

It's called ambition.

But I wouldn't expect you to understand. A mere barmaid. Hardly setting the

world alight, are we, dear? For your information.

Stop it, both of you. I thought you weren't getting involved.

I can't stand seeing you both arguing over me.

Guilty conscience.

No.

I love you both.

It's not if we're alike.

Look at her. She's mousy.

Mae West would look mousy next to you, you pushy little trollop.

Dowdy. It wouldn't be right if I didn't mention the word dowdy. I'd like to see

you do better on a ration.

Actually, Gary got me this blouse.

It's French.

I know.

It used to be mine.

You gave me that one, Dad.

You weren't supposed to meet.

You told me you scared the West End looking for this.

No, just my dustbin.

It's virtually brand new.

She only threw it out because she thought it was a bit tight. It fits you

better. Are you saying I'm underdeveloped? No, you're beautifully

So I'm fat, then, am I?

No!

Oh, Ron, help me out here. Here we go. Gary's in trouble, so it's help me, Ron,

help me, Ron. Oh, mate.

Oh, mate. I'm not your mate.

I'm your mug, your patsy. The only time you call me is when you want something.

But when I want help, you don't want to know.

You use me, Sparrow, and you know it.

He treats me like a proper champ and all.

I'm just a laughingstock as far as he's concerned, the bat of all his jokes.

Oh, now, come on, Reg. I know I make the odd crack, but really... Really?

Really? It's a laugh coming from you.

Nothing real about you as far as I'm concerned, Gary Sparrow.

You're not really a spy, are you? Or a talented songwriter.

You're just a con man with a pocket full of counterfeit fibres. If I wasn't such

an exceptionally stupid policeman, I'd have run you in years ago.

Fortunately for you, though, it's only in your dreams I can see you for what

really are.

I despise you, Gary.

I shan't stay in your imagination for a second longer than I have to.

Ladies, you have my sympathy.

Front door's that way, Ray. Thank you.

True that, doesn't it?

Oh, I suppose you're going to sulk now.

No, he's always doing that.

He's like a little boy who's lost his lollipop. Will you please stop talking

about me like I've left the room?

Sometimes I'll feel as if I've got two kids.

Oh, I know what you mean.

No, I don't, actually.

Gary's never seemed too keen to have kids with me.

Well, then why should he? He's got you for that.

Look, Yvonne, it's not like that, I swear.

Little Michael wasn't planned. He was just an accident.

Just an accident.

Look, I didn't mean it like that.

Yvonne, I will have children with you one day, I promise.

Oh, big of you, Gary.

I'm really sorry.

There's something else he's always doing. Saying sorry.

Tell me about it.

I've always wondered what it would be like to have ringside seats in a

beheading. Although I think this has it beat for sheer savagery.

Look, it's not easy for me, you know.

I'm not proud of being a bigamist, and I don't like having to use you.

I didn't plan all this.

This situation has just happened, and now I'm stuck with it.

I do my best to be there for both of you, to keep you both satisfied.

And you think you do that, do you? Are you satisfied?

I don't think there's anything to be gained in talking about... Are you

satisfied?

Well, of course she is. Let her answer for herself.

Well, we're not comparing to the others.

Others? There's only been Donald.

So, even in a two -horse race, there has to be a loser.

Sorry, Gary.

I suppose you see me as second best as well.

Actually, no.

You're everything I've ever dreamed of, wanted or needed.

She said sarcastically.

Oh, come on, Gary. You don't expect anybody to feel sorry for you, do you?

women on the go, you reckon you're the luckiest bloke in the world.

Oh, yeah, of course.

But not in a selfish, chauvinistic way. Liar.

You love it.

Of course he does.

Well, I think this has gone on long enough. I think it's time he chose

us. So do I.

So come on then, Gary. Which one's it going to be?

I can't.

I can't choose just like that.

You've got to.

No, I haven't.

Because this is just a dream.

My dream.

And I'm going to wake up.

Oh, boy, I just had a nightmare.

And it isn't over yet.

No, it isn't.

I want to wake up. You can't. You took that sleeping tablet, remember?

No, you gave me that sleeping tablet, you bloody traitor.

Stop, darling, Gary. There's no way out. You've got to choose.

We won't leave you alone until you do it.

Do you think you can stand two women nagging you?

Incessantly. On. And on. And on. And on. And on. Okay!

I'm sorry.

It's not that I don't love you. I do very much. It's just... You don't need

You're bright, successful, independent, whereas Phoebe is just... What?

Thick as a plank and can't wipe her arse without you being there to hold her

hand?

I didn't say that. It's what you meant.

Well, you can forget it.

I don't want you.

No, Phoebe.

Get lost.

All right, I've changed my mind. I'll have Yvonne.

No way.

I'm no one's second choice.

I knew this would happen. I can't stand losing both of you.

Oh, you've got to help me out. I can't win.

Well, that's bigger me for you.

Is it over?

Where am I?

When am I?

Phoebe?

Yvonne?

Well, night's to black out, so I'm back in 1944.

Oh, wait a minute.

I can't be.

Can't get a line, so I am back in... Oh, wait a minute. Everything's mixed up.

What's going on?

Hold on.

I don't know if I'm awake.

Maybe I'm in some weird coma.

Stuck between the time zones in a twilight netherworld.

Oh, my God, I'm in X -Files hell.

Destined to be trapped utterly and completely alone.

You're awake.

You feeling better?

Ron, I was so scared.

Only a power cut, Gary.

I was trying to use the account of my line rental.

I have just had the worst ever nightmare.

Phoebe, Yvonne, you, Reg, you were all there. It was terrible.

All my fears and insecurities were laid utterly bare.

Did they discuss your sexual performance?

That's unusual.

I've got to stop this somehow, Ron.

What about that holiday you were talking about?

Why don't you take it?

Eastbourne's nice this time of year. Very quiet, make you feel better.

Morning, Mr Sparrow. Full English, is it?

Oh, yes, please.

Tea or coffee?

Tea, please.

Cook won't keep you long. No, all right.

You OK, Phoebe, dear?

Am I on my commode?

Oh, dear.

Don't worry, son.

You'll get better.

Sparrow.

Sparrow.

Are you okay?

I think I'll be staying another week.

Good night, sweetheart.

Sleep well, banished heart.

Good night, sweetheart,

till we meet tomorrow.

Dreams enfold you, in memory I'll hold

you. Good night, sweetheart.