Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:28,789 --> 00:01:30,850
Aw, it's just not kicking.
2
00:01:31,390 --> 00:01:34,290
Maybe he just needs that last piece of
bacon.
3
00:01:41,790 --> 00:01:45,390
Oh, uh, I was saving it for a baby.
4
00:01:48,230 --> 00:01:51,490
I gotta tell you, the sports page...
5
00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:56,780
A cup of coffee? Is there a better way
to get closer to God on a Sunday
6
00:02:00,020 --> 00:02:02,460
Well, I guess we could actually go to
church. Don't ruin it, Cheryl.
7
00:02:06,920 --> 00:02:07,920
It's him.
8
00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:09,399
It's him!
9
00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:10,460
Oh, no, Jim, please, no!
10
00:02:10,840 --> 00:02:14,200
No, no, that creep drives by our house
on purpose! I swear he does!
11
00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:18,160
It's horrible music, too. Would it kill
him to mix in a little Snoop D -O
12
00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:19,160
-double -G, you see?
13
00:02:37,260 --> 00:02:41,480
watching? Well, no one's outside, but
they are looking out their windows.
14
00:02:42,540 --> 00:02:44,320
Hey, what are you looking at, Marilyn?
15
00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:45,880
And Jim sees them.
16
00:02:47,720 --> 00:02:50,300
You want a show? I'll give you a show.
17
00:02:50,620 --> 00:02:52,340
And there goes his shirt.
18
00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:56,760
Come on, Marilyn, tit for tat.
19
00:02:59,860 --> 00:03:01,460
Are his pants still on?
20
00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:04,140
Technically, yes, but they are down.
21
00:03:07,180 --> 00:03:10,540
I mean, he's always grumpy, but lately
it's... Come on, Marilyn.
22
00:03:10,820 --> 00:03:11,860
Get your camera.
23
00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:15,800
You know you're jealous. You just wish
yours was as tight as this.
24
00:03:21,140 --> 00:03:22,720
Maybe he has IMS.
25
00:03:23,640 --> 00:03:27,140
What's IMS? I was just reading about it
in one of my magazines.
26
00:03:27,460 --> 00:03:28,460
Here.
27
00:03:29,420 --> 00:03:32,300
Does your man have irritable male
syndrome?
28
00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:33,600
Yeah.
29
00:03:34,060 --> 00:03:36,680
guys when they reach a certain age just
start blowing their top at everything
30
00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:40,500
it's a real disease it's gotta be real
there's a quiz
31
00:03:40,500 --> 00:03:47,120
oh my god i didn't marry a jerk
32
00:03:47,120 --> 00:03:54,040
i married a good man with a terrible
disease a good man who just left
33
00:03:54,040 --> 00:03:56,480
a butt print on the windshield of the
kranus's new hybrid
34
00:04:06,540 --> 00:04:07,780
Yes, my young bride. What is it?
35
00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:13,320
It's about this article that Dana found
in a magazine about a condition called
36
00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:16,800
IMS. It's irritable male syndrome.
37
00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:21,260
I think it might explain why you keep
overreacting. Oh, honey, I don't
38
00:04:21,260 --> 00:04:23,520
overreact. The rest of the world
underreacts.
39
00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:28,380
Constructs elaborate justifications for
anger. Check.
40
00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:31,440
Oh, my God.
41
00:04:31,820 --> 00:04:34,840
This article is exactly what pisses me
off about America.
42
00:04:35,380 --> 00:04:36,460
Globalizes his irritation.
43
00:04:36,880 --> 00:04:37,880
Check.
44
00:04:38,960 --> 00:04:40,800
Jim, do you hear this?
45
00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:43,100
This is freaky. Is his picture in there?
46
00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:46,600
Oh, come on. Everybody's got a syndrome
now.
47
00:04:46,860 --> 00:04:49,660
I'm not lazy. I got chronic fatigue
syndrome.
48
00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:53,240
It's not hot outside. It's global
warming.
49
00:04:54,720 --> 00:04:59,640
You're not hyper. You got restless leg
syndrome. Right. You're not fat. You're
50
00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:00,640
pregnant. Hey.
51
00:05:03,850 --> 00:05:06,190
What's the one at work that you always
try to pull on me?
52
00:05:06,590 --> 00:05:10,730
High blood pressure? Oh, yeah. My
blood's got too much pressure. I need a
53
00:05:11,750 --> 00:05:13,190
Jim, I passed out.
54
00:05:14,450 --> 00:05:16,230
Okay, now we're just playing word games.
55
00:05:17,170 --> 00:05:21,510
Minimizes other suffering, frequently
changes subject, dismisses contradictory
56
00:05:21,510 --> 00:05:25,650
opinions. Jim, this could be the first
test you ever got a perfect score on.
57
00:05:26,770 --> 00:05:29,050
This IMS is a bunch of crap.
58
00:05:29,510 --> 00:05:31,670
It's made up nonsense like PMS.
59
00:05:34,060 --> 00:05:35,460
I'm sorry, is it the 15th already?
60
00:05:38,340 --> 00:05:39,340
Listen.
61
00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:41,840
It's the Tupper again.
62
00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:43,140
He's coming around again.
63
00:05:43,620 --> 00:05:45,440
Come on, Andy. Come on, give me a hand
here.
64
00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:49,160
I can still hear him. I can still hear
him. Jim, I can feel my blood sugar
65
00:05:49,160 --> 00:05:50,160
plummeting. Shut up.
66
00:05:51,920 --> 00:05:52,920
What was that?
67
00:05:53,220 --> 00:05:54,220
It hit the Tupper?
68
00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,320
or go. That's what you're doing. You're
letting them go.
69
00:06:09,560 --> 00:06:12,100
Okay, guys, guys, come on. Let's not say
something. Excuse me, sir. Are you
70
00:06:12,100 --> 00:06:12,979
touching me?
71
00:06:12,980 --> 00:06:14,400
Oh, dear. The pressure.
72
00:06:15,560 --> 00:06:17,960
You can't let them go. You did your job.
73
00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:23,420
Hey, Merrill. Hey, Merrill. You want a
show, Merrill? I'll give you a show.
74
00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:27,260
I'm going to need some backup at 412
Maple Street.
75
00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:30,260
Here's a show, Merrill.
76
00:06:40,590 --> 00:06:46,050
I can't believe I got to go to this.
What was that about?
77
00:06:46,410 --> 00:06:48,830
Well, I wanted to take a picture of you
before your first anger management
78
00:06:48,830 --> 00:06:51,850
class. I'm going to take another one in
six weeks and see how different you look
79
00:06:51,850 --> 00:06:52,850
without your rage.
80
00:06:54,350 --> 00:06:57,530
Cheryl, I have no problem controlling my
anger.
81
00:06:57,810 --> 00:07:00,750
You know, I think they'll probably
address denial right off the bat.
82
00:07:01,650 --> 00:07:02,650
Well,
83
00:07:02,910 --> 00:07:05,970
if it isn't the Maple Street Stripper.
84
00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:10,700
Ready for this court -mandated hell
you've condemned me to?
85
00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:15,060
All right, look. That officer testified
that we were both out of control.
86
00:07:15,420 --> 00:07:17,640
And besides, I already apologized to
you.
87
00:07:18,040 --> 00:07:20,680
Stuff happens. Get over it. It's not an
apology!
88
00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:23,780
Save it for the anger class.
89
00:07:24,260 --> 00:07:25,260
Don't worry, buddy.
90
00:07:25,380 --> 00:07:27,120
I got plenty left in the tank!
91
00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:28,900
Andy, rage picture!
92
00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:42,280
So now when my ex -wife's dogs start
barking all night, I don't get mad.
93
00:07:43,220 --> 00:07:46,340
I just get up and take them for a walk.
94
00:07:50,860 --> 00:07:51,860
Excuse me.
95
00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:54,160
Why are you still living with your ex
-wife?
96
00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:56,719
I'm not.
97
00:07:56,720 --> 00:08:01,040
I'm just watching her dogs while she's
on vacation with... him.
98
00:08:04,300 --> 00:08:05,500
That's really great, Howard.
99
00:08:05,960 --> 00:08:10,520
The happy little man inside me is
smiling at the happy little man inside
100
00:08:12,260 --> 00:08:14,820
He better keep his happy little hands
off of me.
101
00:08:16,820 --> 00:08:18,280
Jim, is there something you wanted to
say?
102
00:08:18,920 --> 00:08:19,920
Yeah.
103
00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:23,920
Yeah. We got 41 minutes left at the end
of this meeting.
104
00:08:24,760 --> 00:08:26,300
Thank you for your frequent updates.
105
00:08:26,540 --> 00:08:27,540
Yes.
106
00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:30,640
Do you mind? Some of us are trying to
learn something about ourselves.
107
00:08:32,539 --> 00:08:34,220
That sounded a little angry, Andy.
108
00:08:34,780 --> 00:08:39,400
Let's explore the source of that anger.
Oh, I can't imagine what the source of
109
00:08:39,400 --> 00:08:40,419
my anger would be.
110
00:08:42,080 --> 00:08:43,799
Sounds like he's mad at his mother.
111
00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:46,580
You don't know anything about my mother.
112
00:08:46,820 --> 00:08:50,020
I'm just saying, a lot of fat guys don't
like their mother.
113
00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:55,280
I'll have you know that my mother is a
wonderful cake. I mean, woman, damn it!
114
00:08:57,580 --> 00:09:00,000
Bob, you have provoked Andy.
115
00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:01,400
What do we say?
116
00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:06,640
The angry little man in me is sorry.
117
00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:10,620
If he hurt the fat little man in you.
118
00:09:14,620 --> 00:09:15,620
Thank you.
119
00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:17,420
Now that's an apology.
120
00:09:19,520 --> 00:09:22,660
Pardon me. Are you an A .H.? The hell
did you just call me?
121
00:09:24,080 --> 00:09:26,880
An A .H.? Moderate your tones.
122
00:09:27,700 --> 00:09:29,800
An A .H. means anger helper.
123
00:09:30,260 --> 00:09:32,740
But you are kind of being an A .H.
124
00:09:35,950 --> 00:09:39,690
K .H. is someone who acts as a buffer
between you and your I .T .s. I what?
125
00:09:40,770 --> 00:09:41,810
Irritation triggers.
126
00:09:42,170 --> 00:09:44,050
You want to stay away from those.
127
00:09:44,810 --> 00:09:49,110
Well, what if I'm in a room just filled
with irritation triggers?
128
00:09:50,030 --> 00:09:52,390
Take a deep breath and walk away.
129
00:09:52,890 --> 00:09:54,150
See you guys next week.
130
00:09:57,630 --> 00:10:02,290
Jim, everyone here knows it's a
struggle.
131
00:10:03,560 --> 00:10:05,400
I don't like having a disease.
132
00:10:06,300 --> 00:10:11,700
I don't like being treated differently
and having to park in a handicapped
133
00:10:14,220 --> 00:10:15,440
But that's the work.
134
00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:21,380
And we do it because we want to get
better. I want to get better.
135
00:10:24,700 --> 00:10:25,700
Handicapped spot?
136
00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:31,900
Irritable male syndrome is a recognized
psychological handicap.
137
00:10:32,100 --> 00:10:33,120
For Howard...
138
00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:34,700
Parking lots are a big trigger.
139
00:10:36,660 --> 00:10:38,040
You don't have a placard yet?
140
00:10:38,840 --> 00:10:40,560
Well, not a legal one.
141
00:10:42,360 --> 00:10:46,200
Jim, I think you'll find many tools at
your disposal for all of your triggers.
142
00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:48,900
People who talk in a movie theater?
143
00:10:49,280 --> 00:10:50,820
Special screenings with ushers?
144
00:10:51,220 --> 00:10:52,220
They'll throw them out.
145
00:10:52,820 --> 00:10:53,820
Even my wife?
146
00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:55,840
Especially your wife.
147
00:10:57,560 --> 00:11:01,160
Telemarketers? All your calls are
screened at a special IMS center.
148
00:11:02,060 --> 00:11:03,060
Even my wife?
149
00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:04,920
Especially your wife.
150
00:11:09,060 --> 00:11:11,060
My name is Jim and I have IMS.
151
00:11:12,740 --> 00:11:13,760
I love you.
152
00:11:21,980 --> 00:11:24,540
Oh, I want to feel the baby kick. Make
it kick again.
153
00:11:24,820 --> 00:11:26,020
He kicked a lot yesterday.
154
00:11:26,620 --> 00:11:28,240
Right after I got a foot rub.
155
00:11:30,730 --> 00:11:33,390
Well, then off with those shoes, missy.
You insist.
156
00:11:35,890 --> 00:11:37,190
Hey. Hey.
157
00:11:37,790 --> 00:11:40,610
How was anger class?
158
00:11:40,990 --> 00:11:43,570
Oh, Cheryl, when you're right, you are
right.
159
00:11:44,850 --> 00:11:46,290
I got the IMS.
160
00:11:48,230 --> 00:11:49,370
And I got it bad.
161
00:11:50,350 --> 00:11:54,010
I knew it. I knew it. You know, I hate
to say I told you so, but...
162
00:12:04,720 --> 00:12:06,200
And I really want to help you, Jim.
163
00:12:08,140 --> 00:12:09,220
Are you sure, Cheryl?
164
00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:11,920
Because IMS does not take a holiday.
165
00:12:16,780 --> 00:12:22,160
If you want to be my A .H., you've got
to protect me from the I .T.'s.
166
00:12:24,040 --> 00:12:25,040
Absolutely.
167
00:12:25,420 --> 00:12:26,420
What does that mean?
168
00:12:27,900 --> 00:12:28,900
Here.
169
00:12:29,220 --> 00:12:30,720
Read the literature. I'm exhausted.
170
00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:36,600
We're going to get through this, mister.
You hear me?
171
00:12:37,520 --> 00:12:38,520
I love you.
172
00:12:44,020 --> 00:12:45,020
The phone?
173
00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:51,420
That ringing, ringing, it just rattles
the very core of my serenity. I'll get
174
00:12:51,420 --> 00:12:54,080
it. It's okay, baby. I'll get it. I'll
get it.
175
00:12:54,300 --> 00:12:55,300
Hello?
176
00:12:56,100 --> 00:12:58,040
Oh, Gail, hi.
177
00:12:58,740 --> 00:12:59,740
How are you?
178
00:13:00,240 --> 00:13:02,200
So many words, so much talking.
179
00:13:06,190 --> 00:13:07,190
Hey, did you get my email?
180
00:13:07,470 --> 00:13:10,170
Yes, it's called IMS. That's why he's
like that.
181
00:13:17,470 --> 00:13:19,210
What? Come on.
182
00:13:19,550 --> 00:13:21,830
You don't believe this IMS stuff.
183
00:13:22,750 --> 00:13:24,350
It's not what it says on my card.
184
00:13:27,450 --> 00:13:30,830
I have IMS. Please let me have my way.
185
00:13:37,390 --> 00:13:40,290
at the meeting. I am officially a
victim.
186
00:13:40,690 --> 00:13:45,570
Oh, come on. You're just working,
Cheryl. And until I hatch this egg,
187
00:13:45,570 --> 00:13:47,490
racket. Was your racket, Dana?
188
00:13:48,350 --> 00:13:51,530
I got IMS, so shut your YAP.
189
00:13:53,730 --> 00:13:57,930
Cheryl, he is just telling you he has
IMS because that's what you want to
190
00:13:58,050 --> 00:13:59,029
Irritation trigger!
191
00:13:59,030 --> 00:14:00,030
Irritation trigger!
192
00:14:07,390 --> 00:14:08,890
Maybe you should leave. What?
193
00:14:09,670 --> 00:14:10,790
You're buying this?
194
00:14:11,190 --> 00:14:14,110
Honey, she's hurting the sad little man
inside me.
195
00:14:16,690 --> 00:14:17,950
I'm sorry, baby.
196
00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:20,610
Dana, I'm sorry, but Jim has a medical
condition.
197
00:14:21,050 --> 00:14:24,610
No, he doesn't. Yes, I do. It says it
right here in my tote bag.
198
00:14:38,670 --> 00:14:40,650
You know what the guys said at the
meeting?
199
00:14:40,890 --> 00:14:43,850
What? They said that shower sex
sometimes helps.
200
00:14:48,770 --> 00:14:53,170
And after they received my doctor's
note, I got a special sticker that left
201
00:14:53,170 --> 00:14:55,330
driving a carpool lane, even when I'm by
myself.
202
00:14:57,090 --> 00:15:00,610
That should help with my road rage.
203
00:15:04,890 --> 00:15:05,890
Wow.
204
00:15:06,130 --> 00:15:07,130
Wow.
205
00:15:07,330 --> 00:15:08,330
Great growth.
206
00:15:08,620 --> 00:15:09,620
There, Bob.
207
00:15:09,980 --> 00:15:11,660
Hey, can I get the name of that doctor?
208
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:14,760
Teaching moment.
209
00:15:15,700 --> 00:15:18,560
Anger spurned equals lesson learned.
210
00:15:19,700 --> 00:15:20,700
That's mine.
211
00:15:20,740 --> 00:15:23,160
Actually, I said that last week. It's
mine.
212
00:15:24,080 --> 00:15:27,680
No, no, no, no, no, no. Howard said it.
We talked about putting it on coffee
213
00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:32,240
mugs. And little pillows and tiny
little... Now let's welcome a new member
214
00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:33,240
our group.
215
00:15:34,120 --> 00:15:35,680
Please welcome David.
216
00:15:39,790 --> 00:15:41,150
What was it, David, that brought you
here?
217
00:15:41,430 --> 00:15:42,870
Paint your journey for us.
218
00:15:44,430 --> 00:15:46,170
The judge kind of made me.
219
00:15:47,030 --> 00:15:51,510
Because the cops pulled me over for
playing my car stereo too loud.
220
00:16:01,350 --> 00:16:02,890
What street were you on?
221
00:16:04,990 --> 00:16:06,330
I think it was Maple.
222
00:16:13,230 --> 00:16:14,650
who always takes his shirt off.
223
00:17:04,089 --> 00:17:07,450
Why don't you explain it to me? I'll
stop!
224
00:17:07,770 --> 00:17:11,410
You guys are really challenging my
serenity! My serenity!
225
00:17:18,349 --> 00:17:19,349
Rest in peace.
226
00:17:59,470 --> 00:18:02,030
I thought I'd get to know so many of our
local policemen by name.
227
00:18:04,970 --> 00:18:07,530
So we had an IMS episode.
228
00:18:09,550 --> 00:18:15,350
The important thing now is that we
create a safety sphere and enjoy some
229
00:18:15,350 --> 00:18:16,350
breaths.
230
00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:20,570
Cheryl, I don't have IMS.
231
00:18:21,310 --> 00:18:26,050
Yeah. Yeah, you do. It happens to men
when they reach a certain age.
232
00:18:26,350 --> 00:18:27,710
Well, then that age was six.
233
00:18:29,390 --> 00:18:31,130
Because, honey, I've been like this my
whole life.
234
00:18:32,450 --> 00:18:36,750
Jim, you have to have it. I told
everybody you have it.
235
00:18:38,530 --> 00:18:43,110
Cheryl, Cheryl, I know you really would
like me to have it, that you need me to
236
00:18:43,110 --> 00:18:46,030
have it, because then it would explain
all the weird things that I do.
237
00:18:46,810 --> 00:18:49,990
You know what? I wish I had it, because
then I could do whatever I wanted.
238
00:18:51,470 --> 00:18:53,290
But I don't have IMS.
239
00:18:54,230 --> 00:18:55,750
I have JIM.
240
00:18:58,250 --> 00:19:02,250
You just have to accept the fact you
married a jerk.
241
00:19:04,690 --> 00:19:05,690
I know.
242
00:19:07,810 --> 00:19:08,810
You do?
243
00:19:09,050 --> 00:19:10,050
Yes.
244
00:19:10,270 --> 00:19:12,630
Okay. Well, then what's the problem?
245
00:19:13,770 --> 00:19:20,590
Jim, the problem is that lately you've
been, like, super jerk.
246
00:19:20,730 --> 00:19:22,390
What do you mean, super jerk?
247
00:19:22,610 --> 00:19:25,810
Every weekend, you're out there on the
front lawn yelling at our neighbors,
248
00:19:25,890 --> 00:19:27,030
ripping off your shirt.
249
00:19:31,510 --> 00:19:33,530
Well, it is kind of fun.
250
00:19:34,150 --> 00:19:36,350
Fun? It is. It's fun.
251
00:19:36,570 --> 00:19:40,650
I'm running outside, my shirt off,
yelling, screaming.
252
00:19:40,870 --> 00:19:41,870
It's kind of fun.
253
00:19:42,990 --> 00:19:44,390
That's like a football game.
254
00:19:45,410 --> 00:19:46,410
Yeah.
255
00:19:47,370 --> 00:19:48,370
Yeah, it is.
256
00:19:50,310 --> 00:19:52,530
Okay, well, here's an idea.
257
00:19:53,170 --> 00:19:58,290
How about instead of mooning Marilyn
Cranes, you go to a football game?
258
00:19:59,070 --> 00:20:03,210
Or, you know, go out with the guys or
play with the band. You know, why don't
259
00:20:03,210 --> 00:20:04,210
you do that stuff anymore?
260
00:20:05,990 --> 00:20:12,930
I don't know. I think, uh... Well... I
think I like it
261
00:20:12,930 --> 00:20:13,930
here.
262
00:20:14,830 --> 00:20:16,390
I like this family.
263
00:20:17,990 --> 00:20:18,990
I like you.
264
00:20:20,270 --> 00:20:22,050
I like two of the kids.
265
00:20:29,740 --> 00:20:35,020
I guess when push comes to shove, I love
hanging out with you.
266
00:20:36,340 --> 00:20:38,140
Oh, that is so sweet.
267
00:20:39,540 --> 00:20:40,560
Go to a game.
268
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:44,760
Really? I want you to blow off steam.
269
00:20:45,280 --> 00:20:48,140
I want you to stop getting naked in the
front yard.
270
00:20:50,060 --> 00:20:51,060
All right.
271
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:52,520
Deal.
272
00:20:53,420 --> 00:20:54,600
I won't get naked.
273
00:20:54,860 --> 00:20:56,060
I'll wear boxer shorts.
274
00:20:57,900 --> 00:21:00,180
All right, but not the ones that say
over a billion serves.
275
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:03,980
You drive a hard bargain.
21198
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.