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Oh, my gosh.
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What? What happened?
3
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Nothing.
4
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We've just never seen you clean
anything.
5
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Oh.
6
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Well, Mommy's going to be home soon, and
I want everything to look nice, so come
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on, give me a hand here. Let's make sure
this looks nice.
8
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You know, Mommy's coming back from that
funeral, and she's going to be very,
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very sad, so lots of hugs and kisses,
and I just put those in alphabetical
10
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order.
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00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:26,400
Put that down.
12
00:00:26,620 --> 00:00:28,160
Who was Uncle Donald again?
13
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Uncle Donald was Grandpa's older
brother.
14
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Remember the one who lost his finger
during the war?
15
00:00:36,450 --> 00:00:37,970
Uncle Donald had a farm.
16
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And on that farm, he had a heart attack.
17
00:00:45,290 --> 00:00:48,430
But we don't want to talk about that
when Mom's around, all right?
18
00:00:49,210 --> 00:00:51,370
Daddy, what happens after you die?
19
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Well, people cry for a while, and then
they sell your clothes.
20
00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:12,818
Okay, okay.
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They're here. They're here. All right,
remember, what did we have for dinner
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last few nights?
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Pizza! All right, and what are we going
to tell Mom we had?
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Salad! Broccoli!
25
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Pizza!
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Okay, if you don't say anything, just
give her a hug and go right to your
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bedroom.
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Go, go, go, go, go.
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Mommy!
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Hey, baby. How you feeling, all right?
Oh, okay.
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Wow, look at how spotless the kids are
all.
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What did you do? Send him to another
family for three days?
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You know what? I'm exhausted. I'm going
to go lay down for a little bit. Yes,
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yes. Come on. Go get Mommy's bags. Let's
go. Let's help her. Hey, honey.
35
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What did you eat while I was gone?
36
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All right.
37
00:01:58,680 --> 00:01:59,760
Well, welcome back.
38
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That funeral must have been rough, huh?
How are you feeling?
39
00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:06,320
A little sad. Hey, want to play some
ping pong?
40
00:02:07,780 --> 00:02:08,880
What? Ping -pong.
41
00:02:09,199 --> 00:02:12,480
You know, get the blood flowing. I was
in that car for three hours. I'd smack
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the egg around for a while.
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Come on, you don't seem that broken up
about your Uncle Donald.
44
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Wasn't a fan.
45
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One Thanksgiving, when Andy was 12, he
asked Uncle Donald to pass the mashed
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potatoes, and Donald said, Andrew, are
you sure that's such a good idea?
47
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Grouchy old four -fingered fart.
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That's why to this day, I never eat
mashed potatoes. You eat mashed potatoes
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the time.
50
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Yes, but I'm bitter about it.
51
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I'm sorry you guys had a go -throw.
Honey?
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Yes? Would you bring me some tissues?
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I'm here for you, baby.
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Anything you need. You want some water?
You want something to eat?
55
00:02:52,580 --> 00:02:54,000
Wow. What do you mean, wow?
56
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I've just never seen you this gentle and
kind before.
57
00:02:57,660 --> 00:02:59,380
I wish more of our relatives would die.
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I wish you would just leave.
59
00:03:11,020 --> 00:03:13,280
Is there any more perfect food than
soup?
60
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Warm nourishing helps you when you're
sick.
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It's like your mom in a bowl.
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That soup is for Cheryl, not for you.
63
00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:24,540
Is there any more perfect food than
crackers?
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00:03:26,760 --> 00:03:27,760
Jim?
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00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:29,780
How are you coming with that soup?
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00:03:30,760 --> 00:03:31,860
It's almost done, honey.
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I really appreciate it.
68
00:03:34,160 --> 00:03:35,160
I'm here for you, baby.
69
00:03:36,220 --> 00:03:38,120
Wow, look at you, Jimmy Homemaker.
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Cooking, cleaning, got the kids all
organized.
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00:03:42,060 --> 00:03:45,180
If you're as good in the bedroom as you
are in the kitchen, you're quite a
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00:03:45,180 --> 00:03:46,180
catch.
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00:03:47,700 --> 00:03:49,540
I would rock your world.
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00:03:51,820 --> 00:03:55,900
Jim, would you put some of those
crackers I like in the soup?
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I'm here for you, baby.
76
00:04:00,860 --> 00:04:02,880
Hey. Hey, Dana.
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00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:08,170
Dana, let me ask you something. Oh, for
the last time, yes, it's Ryan's baby.
78
00:04:09,550 --> 00:04:12,950
You know, how are you doing with this
grieving thing? Because Cheryl's having
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00:04:12,950 --> 00:04:16,230
hell of a time. Yeah, I know, and they
weren't even that close. I mean, I spent
80
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whole summers on the farm. I remember
Uncle Donald used to make this blueberry
81
00:04:20,170 --> 00:04:24,470
pie that was so good, and he'd say, come
on, eat up, skinny mini, put some meat
82
00:04:24,470 --> 00:04:25,470
on those bones.
83
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Son of a bitch.
84
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Just give her a couple days. She'll be
fine.
85
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Yeah. Hey, thanks for doing these.
86
00:04:34,660 --> 00:04:35,660
These are your towels?
87
00:04:35,900 --> 00:04:38,600
Yeah, well, you've been doing so much
laundry lately, I thought I'd flip them
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00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:39,600
in.
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00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:42,940
Hey, if you find any underwear your size
with lace on them, they're mine.
90
00:04:46,700 --> 00:04:50,480
Jim, could you put some butter on those
crackers?
91
00:04:53,220 --> 00:04:55,480
Andy, I don't know that much about
grief.
92
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Because everybody that I've known that's
died, I didn't really care for.
93
00:05:00,910 --> 00:05:03,710
But I heard that, you know, it takes
only about two weeks.
94
00:05:05,190 --> 00:05:06,190
Where'd you hear that?
95
00:05:06,350 --> 00:05:07,750
In my head. That's where I hear all the
stuff.
96
00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:12,930
And you know what? Dana's over Uncle
Donald and Cheryl's not.
97
00:05:13,270 --> 00:05:14,270
What's going on?
98
00:05:14,590 --> 00:05:15,630
Why would she be?
99
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He weighed on her hand and foot. She's
got the sweetest deal in Crybaby County.
100
00:05:21,490 --> 00:05:22,650
What are you talking about?
101
00:05:24,130 --> 00:05:27,610
Jim, she's faking this to work you.
102
00:05:29,390 --> 00:05:30,870
No, Cheryl's not that devious.
103
00:05:31,350 --> 00:05:33,510
She's been married to you for 15 years.
104
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It rubs off.
105
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Oh, please.
106
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No, no, no. I never once rocked a
vending machine before I met you.
107
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Now, I don't even carry change.
108
00:05:45,710 --> 00:05:48,410
You don't carry change because I made
fun of your purse.
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Come on.
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Okay,
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I'm out of line. Yes, she's too good.
You're damn right. Yeah, yeah.
112
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She's probably just warning her dear
uncle that she hasn't seen since 1994.
113
00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:07,920
Wake up, Jim.
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Your little pixie has a dark side. Dare
I say evil side.
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00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:17,680
I was going through your mail when I
came across this travel brochure.
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She's working you, my friend, so you
take her to Hawaii.
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Say aloha to the real Cheryl.
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Hawaii?
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Come on, I can't even get her off the
couch a little on Hawaii.
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I know.
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Because she's so vewy, vewy sea -eyed.
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Yeah?
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The suit?
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He's here for you, baby.
125
00:07:04,490 --> 00:07:05,830
Well, if it tastes as good as it smells.
126
00:07:06,470 --> 00:07:08,450
Not too hot, is it? Let me see.
127
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Perfect.
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00:07:21,230 --> 00:07:24,910
What are you doing?
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Having my lunch.
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I thought that was for me.
131
00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:31,530
Oh, no. Yours is on the stove.
132
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Oh, and bring me some pudding and a
beer, will you?
133
00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:36,880
What's going on?
134
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You tell me.
135
00:07:39,900 --> 00:07:42,040
Jim, why are you acting this way?
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00:07:42,540 --> 00:07:44,000
Acting? That's interesting.
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00:07:44,940 --> 00:07:45,940
Acting.
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Make -believe.
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Pretend. Faking.
140
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Snow job.
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Buffalo.
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Baloney.
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Bamboozle.
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00:07:55,420 --> 00:07:56,860
I know what you're up to, woman.
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00:07:57,080 --> 00:07:58,080
What are you...
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00:07:58,730 --> 00:08:02,370
The soup, the back rubs, the laundry,
making me watch Driving Miss Daisy.
147
00:08:03,710 --> 00:08:07,450
You've been playing me pretty good,
Toots, but the game is over.
148
00:08:07,770 --> 00:08:08,770
What game?
149
00:08:08,950 --> 00:08:12,890
You are faking this grief over your
Uncle Donald to work me.
150
00:08:13,590 --> 00:08:14,590
What?
151
00:08:14,930 --> 00:08:16,770
How could you even think that?
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Oh, boo -hoo.
153
00:08:18,950 --> 00:08:20,630
Boo, freaking hoo.
154
00:08:21,690 --> 00:08:25,890
Hey, you want to feel better? How about
a little trip to Hawaii?
155
00:08:26,830 --> 00:08:30,310
I'm going to go back to Hawaii. My
little grass is shaking. Back, back,
156
00:08:30,350 --> 00:08:31,350
back to Hawaii.
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00:08:33,169 --> 00:08:36,230
That's what you think this is? That's
what you think this is all about?
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00:08:36,570 --> 00:08:39,169
By the tone of your voice, I'm having my
doubts, but go on.
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My Uncle Donald was a decorated World
War II hero. He saw hundreds of his
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shipmates perish at Pearl Harbor. His
last wish was to have his ashes strewn
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where they died.
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00:08:51,850 --> 00:08:53,630
I was hoping to make that possible.
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There's a little soup left.
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00:09:06,070 --> 00:09:07,070
Eat it.
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Pearl Harbor.
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I didn't see that coming.
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00:09:36,330 --> 00:09:37,330
Hey, baby.
168
00:09:42,510 --> 00:09:43,650
Hey, jackass.
169
00:09:46,790 --> 00:09:49,450
Oh, we're talking. We're talking. That's
good.
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00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:52,630
Cute names. That's good, too. Cute
names.
171
00:09:56,430 --> 00:09:58,250
Look, can I at least say something to my
defense?
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00:09:59,170 --> 00:10:00,710
Do you really think you have a defense?
173
00:10:02,190 --> 00:10:04,530
Well, I have one up here.
174
00:10:06,220 --> 00:10:08,120
But it may fall apart when it comes out
here.
175
00:10:09,860 --> 00:10:13,980
All right. Remember, the last thing you
want to do is make things worse.
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That's why I'm taking my time.
177
00:10:22,540 --> 00:10:23,540
Okay.
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00:10:24,520 --> 00:10:26,260
So you're not working me.
179
00:10:27,700 --> 00:10:30,780
But Dana seems to be over Uncle Donald.
180
00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:33,800
And I understand that...
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00:10:34,060 --> 00:10:36,240
She was closer to him than you were.
182
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So I was thinking...
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00:10:39,760 --> 00:10:45,060
Maybe
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00:10:45,060 --> 00:10:51,980
we could take a page from those brave
men who survived Pearl
185
00:10:51,980 --> 00:10:57,140
Harbor and, you know, suck it up and
move on.
186
00:11:23,310 --> 00:11:24,310
worse, haven't I?
187
00:11:27,830 --> 00:11:31,330
Just to be clear, he actually used the
words, suck it up?
188
00:11:31,950 --> 00:11:36,130
Yeah. Here's the scary part. That was
after giving it a lot of thought.
189
00:11:37,490 --> 00:11:41,270
I'm telling you, in 15 years, I have
never been this mad at him.
190
00:11:41,770 --> 00:11:44,710
Well, on the bright side, your sadness
has been replaced by anger.
191
00:11:45,410 --> 00:11:47,190
Anger, fury, bitterness.
192
00:11:48,430 --> 00:11:49,610
You know, I do feel better.
193
00:11:51,660 --> 00:11:56,260
if you wanted to really feel better,
nah, forget it. What?
194
00:11:57,500 --> 00:12:00,300
Well, it's because most people would
want revenge.
195
00:12:00,680 --> 00:12:03,900
Oh, Dana, revenge is such an ugly word.
196
00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:05,740
But it's the correct one.
197
00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:13,040
Oh, oh, Dana, come on. You know me. I
could never
198
00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:16,880
understand unless you explain further.
199
00:12:17,240 --> 00:12:18,240
Okay.
200
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:22,940
Jim already feels so guilty, he would do
anything for you. So use your
201
00:12:22,940 --> 00:12:29,320
imagination. Have fun. You could
really... Well, punish is an ugly word.
202
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,140
But it is the correct word.
203
00:12:35,300 --> 00:12:36,300
Jim!
204
00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:39,540
Do you think he heard you?
205
00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:50,660
And thanks for calling me Jim.
206
00:12:52,120 --> 00:12:55,280
You know that little deli that has the
corned beef I like?
207
00:12:56,520 --> 00:12:57,520
In Milwaukee?
208
00:12:58,940 --> 00:13:02,140
I think a sandwich from there really
picked me up.
209
00:13:03,420 --> 00:13:04,560
I'll be back in four hours.
210
00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:09,220
I have never been prouder of you.
211
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,860
When he gets home, I'm going to tell him
you forgot the potatoes.
212
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:15,220
I guess I'm going to cry.
213
00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,240
I'm here for you, baby.
214
00:13:38,990 --> 00:13:39,990
for you, baby.
215
00:13:43,470 --> 00:13:44,530
What you doing?
216
00:13:45,450 --> 00:13:47,730
The bereaved wants cocoa.
217
00:13:48,510 --> 00:13:53,910
Has it ever occurred to you that maybe,
just maybe, Cheryl's laying it on thick
218
00:13:53,910 --> 00:13:55,270
like this just to punish you?
219
00:13:55,470 --> 00:13:56,990
Of course it's occurred to me.
220
00:13:57,290 --> 00:13:59,030
I had to go to Iowa for ice cream.
221
00:14:00,030 --> 00:14:04,110
Hold on it. This slave toady thing is
pathetic. You're like me with a new
222
00:14:04,110 --> 00:14:05,110
girlfriend.
223
00:14:05,740 --> 00:14:08,620
I can't call her on anything, never
again. What if I'm wrong?
224
00:14:08,900 --> 00:14:11,280
If I'm wrong, I'll be doing nice stuff
till I die.
225
00:14:12,280 --> 00:14:13,280
Hello.
226
00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:14,720
My cocoa.
227
00:14:16,500 --> 00:14:17,500
Almost done.
228
00:14:20,660 --> 00:14:22,140
I can't take this anymore.
229
00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:26,920
Her little games are gnawing at me like
a starving coyote ripping at my salty
230
00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:27,920
thighs.
231
00:14:29,420 --> 00:14:30,420
You are upset.
232
00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:32,220
That's a hell of a metaphor.
233
00:14:34,250 --> 00:14:36,530
I want revenge, but I'm stuck.
234
00:14:37,150 --> 00:14:38,230
I don't have a move.
235
00:14:43,070 --> 00:14:44,070
Spittin' her cocoa.
236
00:14:46,710 --> 00:14:47,710
What?
237
00:14:48,050 --> 00:14:49,450
Spittin' her cocoa. It's perfect.
238
00:14:50,850 --> 00:14:51,890
What are you, crazy?
239
00:14:52,750 --> 00:14:55,490
Trust me. It'll make you feel a whole
lot better.
240
00:14:56,770 --> 00:14:58,390
I do it all the time at work.
241
00:14:59,550 --> 00:15:02,910
You work with me. I know what you're
thinking. Let's stay focused on Cheryl.
242
00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:09,760
I'm not going to spit in my wife's
cocoa. Take it from a man who's often
243
00:15:09,760 --> 00:15:10,760
and always powerless.
244
00:15:12,260 --> 00:15:13,260
Do it, Jim.
245
00:15:13,920 --> 00:15:14,920
Do it.
246
00:15:15,980 --> 00:15:17,440
Jim? Jim?
247
00:15:25,680 --> 00:15:26,680
Odorless.
248
00:15:27,140 --> 00:15:28,140
Colorless.
249
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:05,010
Here's your hot cocoa, dear.
250
00:16:07,310 --> 00:16:09,650
Be careful.
251
00:16:10,650 --> 00:16:11,850
It's very hot.
252
00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:39,380
You're having a hard time right now.
253
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:45,340
And I'm no judge of the grief process,
but I'm really beginning to hate you.
254
00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:47,520
What?
255
00:16:49,440 --> 00:16:50,840
I just spit in your cocoa.
256
00:16:51,660 --> 00:16:53,740
What? I know. It surprised me, too.
257
00:16:54,160 --> 00:16:55,620
What the hell is going on?
258
00:16:55,880 --> 00:16:58,700
I just feel like, you know, you're still
working me.
259
00:16:59,260 --> 00:17:00,520
Well, I am working you.
260
00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:01,539
You're what?
261
00:17:01,540 --> 00:17:03,120
Yeah, Toots, and you deserve it.
262
00:17:04,339 --> 00:17:05,339
Aha!
263
00:17:05,540 --> 00:17:08,510
Yo, yo, you are so far from an aha. Ah,
mister.
264
00:17:08,869 --> 00:17:10,670
What do you mean I'm on the corner of ah
and ha?
265
00:17:12,790 --> 00:17:13,790
No, Jim.
266
00:17:14,670 --> 00:17:15,670
No, you're not.
267
00:17:17,030 --> 00:17:20,770
You know, you haven't understood what
I'm going through from the beginning.
268
00:17:21,770 --> 00:17:24,369
My Uncle Donald was my dad's big
brother.
269
00:17:25,609 --> 00:17:28,450
I caught my first fish with him and my
dad.
270
00:17:29,170 --> 00:17:30,850
They taught me how to ride a bike.
271
00:17:31,670 --> 00:17:35,890
I sat between them when I was too afraid
to ride on the Ferris wheel.
272
00:17:37,260 --> 00:17:42,400
And, you know, those are just three of
about a thousand memories.
273
00:17:44,020 --> 00:17:46,420
You know, I'll get through the rest as
fast as I can.
274
00:18:09,930 --> 00:18:10,930
What's the matter with you?
275
00:18:11,310 --> 00:18:13,250
Oh, it's sad, Jim. It's just sad.
276
00:18:15,330 --> 00:18:16,450
I know, I know.
277
00:18:17,070 --> 00:18:20,390
I mean, look at her. She's obviously
really feeling this. She's so upset
278
00:18:20,390 --> 00:18:21,750
now. I just blew the whole thing.
279
00:18:22,390 --> 00:18:23,390
Not that.
280
00:18:24,450 --> 00:18:26,610
Uncle Donald didn't take me fishing.
281
00:18:29,130 --> 00:18:31,050
I never rode a Ferris wheel.
282
00:18:31,650 --> 00:18:34,710
I just wanted mashed potatoes. Is that
so wrong?
283
00:18:50,570 --> 00:18:52,850
I made some new hot cocoa for you.
284
00:18:54,130 --> 00:18:55,610
100 % spit -free.
285
00:19:02,350 --> 00:19:03,590
I'd have done the same thing.
286
00:19:09,410 --> 00:19:10,410
Followed by that.
287
00:19:14,090 --> 00:19:15,090
Mind if I join you?
288
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:39,740
You know, I was thinking about your
Uncle Donald and how it
289
00:19:39,740 --> 00:19:42,380
reminded me about your dad and what a
great guy he was.
290
00:19:42,760 --> 00:19:43,960
He was the best.
291
00:19:44,180 --> 00:19:45,180
Yeah.
292
00:19:45,900 --> 00:19:52,740
And I also thought about when your dad
died, it seemed like he got
293
00:19:52,740 --> 00:19:53,740
over it so quickly.
294
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:55,080
I had to.
295
00:19:56,340 --> 00:20:00,700
My mom completely lost it. The kids were
babies. I had to be there for Andy and
296
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:01,700
Dana.
297
00:20:01,820 --> 00:20:03,080
No, no, no, I remember.
298
00:20:04,820 --> 00:20:09,820
That's why I didn't understand why you
got so upset over Uncle Donald.
299
00:20:11,300 --> 00:20:14,480
And then it hit me that all those
stories you were telling about Uncle
300
00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:16,640
included your father.
301
00:20:19,660 --> 00:20:24,140
So then I thought, well, maybe you were
thinking about your dad, too.
302
00:20:26,260 --> 00:20:27,940
And you're doing now what...
303
00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:31,120
you didn't get to do back then.
304
00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:06,260
Why don't you drink some of that hot
cocoa before it gets cold?
305
00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:12,560
Would you do me a favor?
306
00:21:13,420 --> 00:21:14,420
Anything.
307
00:21:15,300 --> 00:21:16,980
Would you sip from both of them?
308
00:21:23,100 --> 00:21:24,100
Seriously, do it.
23265
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