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1
00:00:03,903 --> 00:00:07,572
CBS presents this
program in color.
2
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:14,505
And, uh... no starch
3
00:01:14,541 --> 00:01:16,174
in the socks for a
change, please, huh?
4
00:01:16,210 --> 00:01:17,386
How 'bout the handkerchiefs?
5
00:01:17,410 --> 00:01:18,509
Uh-oh.
6
00:01:18,545 --> 00:01:21,029
What have we got here?
7
00:01:30,156 --> 00:01:32,391
Captain Warren.
How'd they capture him?
8
00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:33,892
He had everything going for him.
9
00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:37,128
Right. Food, money,
maps... Everything.
10
00:01:37,163 --> 00:01:39,230
I took him out through
the tunnel myself.
11
00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:41,867
The Krauts can't do this to me!
12
00:01:41,902 --> 00:01:43,368
I wonder what went wrong.
13
00:01:44,405 --> 00:01:46,738
So, uh, you tried to escape
14
00:01:46,774 --> 00:01:48,740
from Stalag Five, huh? Yes, sir.
15
00:01:48,776 --> 00:01:50,909
I warn you, no one
escapes from my Stalag.
16
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:52,411
Oh, he's just a
tourist at heart.
17
00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:54,078
How was the trip? Oh, lovely.
18
00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:57,382
Colonel Hogan, I do not
recall having sent for you.
19
00:01:57,418 --> 00:02:00,652
You didn't, sir. I try to
anticipate your every wish.
20
00:02:00,687 --> 00:02:02,365
As a matter of fact,
you're just in time
21
00:02:02,389 --> 00:02:04,167
to witness the
sentencing of this man.
22
00:02:04,191 --> 00:02:06,035
Come on, Colonel, you're
making a big deal out of it.
23
00:02:06,059 --> 00:02:07,837
You got lucky. You
caught him. That's all.
24
00:02:07,861 --> 00:02:09,528
Huh. Lucky? Do you consider
25
00:02:09,563 --> 00:02:12,263
superior intelligence
work lucky?
26
00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:14,377
Schultz! Jawohl,
Herr Kommandant.
27
00:02:14,401 --> 00:02:19,905
30 days in the cooler for
Captain Warren in solitary.
28
00:02:24,912 --> 00:02:27,223
All right, let's
go to the cooler.
29
00:02:27,247 --> 00:02:28,713
Warren, I want to talk to you.
30
00:02:28,749 --> 00:02:31,149
Nein, nein, nein,
nein, that is verboten!
31
00:02:31,184 --> 00:02:32,417
You sound like Klink.
32
00:02:32,453 --> 00:02:35,420
Insults will get you nowhere.
33
00:02:35,456 --> 00:02:37,734
Ay, Schultz, Schultz!
I say, not now!
34
00:02:37,758 --> 00:02:39,891
I want to trade you
a light for a cigarette.
35
00:02:39,927 --> 00:02:41,726
Don't you see I'm busy?
36
00:02:41,762 --> 00:02:44,195
This offer is good
for a limited time only.
37
00:02:44,230 --> 00:02:46,498
Always so busy.
38
00:02:46,533 --> 00:02:47,899
Well, there's a
war on, you know.
39
00:02:47,935 --> 00:02:50,268
Got to live while we
can, me old China.
40
00:02:50,303 --> 00:02:53,137
Here, allow me.
41
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:54,706
Hurry up, then.
42
00:02:59,713 --> 00:03:00,679
Thank you again.
43
00:03:00,714 --> 00:03:03,332
All right, let's
go to the cooler.
44
00:03:03,367 --> 00:03:05,512
Wait a minute, wait a
minute, hold it, hold it.
45
00:03:05,536 --> 00:03:07,436
Where is my key?
46
00:03:07,488 --> 00:03:10,199
Beg your pardon? The key
to the cooler? I gave it to you.
47
00:03:10,223 --> 00:03:13,358
Me? Have you been drinking
this time of morning, Schultz?
48
00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:15,059
Oh, well, that's
shocking, shocking.
49
00:03:15,095 --> 00:03:17,023
And there is some
monkey business going on.
50
00:03:17,047 --> 00:03:18,379
Where is the key?!
51
00:03:18,415 --> 00:03:20,682
Do me a favor, Schultz, I
ain't got your bleeding key.
52
00:03:20,718 --> 00:03:22,317
You must've... you
must've dropped it.
53
00:03:22,352 --> 00:03:23,863
All right, talk fast.
What happened?
54
00:03:23,887 --> 00:03:26,354
Well, they knocked me off,
Colonel... that's what happened.
55
00:03:26,389 --> 00:03:27,767
Did you follow
the escape orders?
56
00:03:27,791 --> 00:03:29,035
Well, sure, and
just when I thought
57
00:03:29,059 --> 00:03:31,037
I had it made, there
they were, boom.
58
00:03:31,061 --> 00:03:32,872
Well, what went wrong, Colonel?
59
00:03:32,896 --> 00:03:34,362
I don't know.
60
00:03:34,397 --> 00:03:36,209
Either the Krauts got lucky,
61
00:03:36,233 --> 00:03:38,377
or there's something
rotten in Denmark,
62
00:03:38,401 --> 00:03:40,736
and right now,
Denmark's way out front.
63
00:03:55,252 --> 00:03:57,552
It's the only
possible explanation.
64
00:03:57,588 --> 00:04:00,054
Now, look, Captain
Warren told me
65
00:04:00,090 --> 00:04:01,834
he made it to the first station.
66
00:04:01,858 --> 00:04:03,670
The inn. Right, the Kaiserhof.
67
00:04:03,694 --> 00:04:06,828
He leaves there okay, makes
it to the second station here.
68
00:04:06,863 --> 00:04:08,163
That's the farmhouse.
69
00:04:08,198 --> 00:04:10,109
He leaves there, and
suddenly, they grab him.
70
00:04:10,133 --> 00:04:12,345
Well, that doesn't really
prove anything, Colonel.
71
00:04:12,369 --> 00:04:14,414
It does to me. Somebody
blew the whistle on him.
72
00:04:14,438 --> 00:04:17,506
I say it's a mistake to
let officers escape alone.
73
00:04:17,541 --> 00:04:19,919
That's right. They can't
manage by themselves.
74
00:04:19,943 --> 00:04:23,543
Girls, just do the laundry;
leave the thinking to us.
75
00:04:24,448 --> 00:04:29,184
Colonel Klink used the phrase
"superior intelligence work".
76
00:04:29,219 --> 00:04:30,797
That's a nice way
of saying traitor.
77
00:04:30,821 --> 00:04:33,366
Exactly. This is
the first escape
78
00:04:33,390 --> 00:04:34,867
we've had loused
up in six months.
79
00:04:34,891 --> 00:04:36,303
Somebody's selling us out.
80
00:04:36,327 --> 00:04:37,704
All right, assume
we know the score.
81
00:04:37,728 --> 00:04:38,694
What do we do about it?
82
00:04:38,729 --> 00:04:40,373
There's only one way to be sure,
83
00:04:40,397 --> 00:04:43,031
and that's travel
the route ourselves.
84
00:04:43,066 --> 00:04:45,367
All of us? I haven't
finished the laundry.
85
00:04:45,402 --> 00:04:47,714
I want Newkirk and
LeBeau to go with me.
86
00:04:47,738 --> 00:04:49,282
We'll be the pigeons, the bait.
87
00:04:49,306 --> 00:04:50,271
Bait?
88
00:04:50,307 --> 00:04:52,374
Look, sir, I would consider it
89
00:04:52,409 --> 00:04:54,876
most cowardly to
escape at this time.
90
00:04:54,911 --> 00:04:58,279
As I see it, my duty
lies here in Stalag 13.
91
00:04:58,315 --> 00:05:01,260
Mine, too, and also, there's
a war going on out there.
92
00:05:01,284 --> 00:05:03,485
Mm-hmm. Captain Warren says
93
00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:05,887
there are a couple of girls
that operate the Kaiserhof.
94
00:05:05,922 --> 00:05:07,172
Good-looking birds, are they?
95
00:05:07,207 --> 00:05:08,851
After two years, who cares?
96
00:05:08,875 --> 00:05:11,354
Colonel, I wish to volunteer
for the escape party.
97
00:05:11,378 --> 00:05:13,511
And me, too, sir. All
present and correct, Colonel.
98
00:05:13,546 --> 00:05:15,524
Amazing the way this
place suddenly comes alive
99
00:05:15,548 --> 00:05:16,848
with volunteers.
100
00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:18,694
And if there's a
short one, she's mine.
101
00:05:18,718 --> 00:05:20,196
Well, there's
always a short one.
102
00:05:20,220 --> 00:05:22,531
Now, look, we're going to
need a good solid diversion,
103
00:05:22,555 --> 00:05:25,001
an excuse for being out of
camp a day or even longer.
104
00:05:25,025 --> 00:05:26,469
That's a lot of roll calls.
105
00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:28,304
All right, now, Kinch,
I want you and Carter
106
00:05:28,328 --> 00:05:30,306
to go out through the
emergency tunnel tonight.
107
00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:31,847
Take some smoke bombs with you.
108
00:05:31,882 --> 00:05:34,249
I want you to make a fire
tomorrow from a good high spot
109
00:05:34,284 --> 00:05:35,484
so we can see it from here.
110
00:05:35,519 --> 00:05:37,213
Got it? Right.
111
00:05:37,237 --> 00:05:40,049
The next step, uh, we're going
to leave up to Colonel Klink.
112
00:05:40,073 --> 00:05:41,372
Any comments?
113
00:05:41,407 --> 00:05:42,719
No, sir. No, sir.
Don't think so.
114
00:05:42,743 --> 00:05:44,386
Uh, Colonel... Hmm?
115
00:05:44,410 --> 00:05:46,188
You got another hole
in your undershirt.
116
00:05:46,212 --> 00:05:47,295
It's impossible.
117
00:05:47,330 --> 00:05:49,030
Uh, I ought to know.
118
00:05:49,065 --> 00:05:51,666
I just put it there.
119
00:05:54,404 --> 00:05:56,537
Come in.
120
00:05:56,573 --> 00:05:58,218
Yes, Fraulein Helga, what is it?
121
00:05:58,242 --> 00:06:00,375
Colonel Hogan is here to
see you, Herr Kommandant.
122
00:06:00,410 --> 00:06:01,587
I'm too busy. I can't see him.
123
00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:02,644
He says it's important.
124
00:06:02,679 --> 00:06:03,979
Very well. Oh!
125
00:06:04,014 --> 00:06:05,947
I'm here to volunteer my
men in the emergency.
126
00:06:05,983 --> 00:06:07,843
Emergency? What
are you talking about?
127
00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:08,867
The forest fire.
128
00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:11,680
Smells like a barbecue
pit in here already.
129
00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:14,489
Here, look for yourself.
130
00:06:14,524 --> 00:06:17,325
That's right, it is a fire.
131
00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:19,294
That's quite a distance away.
132
00:06:19,329 --> 00:06:20,995
Try these.
133
00:06:21,031 --> 00:06:22,831
I...
134
00:06:22,866 --> 00:06:24,499
It's closer than you think.
135
00:06:24,535 --> 00:06:27,168
See, I figure we got
about, uh, two hours.
136
00:06:27,203 --> 00:06:29,348
You're right. It's an emergency.
137
00:06:29,372 --> 00:06:31,840
I'll send every man I
can spare to fight it.
138
00:06:31,875 --> 00:06:33,842
Officer of the Day at once.
139
00:06:33,877 --> 00:06:35,354
Oh, I hope I can control them.
140
00:06:35,378 --> 00:06:37,178
Hogan, I heard
that. Control what?
141
00:06:37,213 --> 00:06:39,514
Ah, ah, of course.
142
00:06:39,550 --> 00:06:41,149
The prisoners will
try a mass escape
143
00:06:41,184 --> 00:06:42,684
once the guards
are out of the camp.
144
00:06:42,719 --> 00:06:44,764
Well, their pride was hurt when
Captain Warren was captured.
145
00:06:44,788 --> 00:06:46,065
I can't guarantee you anything.
146
00:06:46,089 --> 00:06:47,989
Security comes first.
147
00:06:48,024 --> 00:06:49,374
Hey, not bad.
148
00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:51,254
That's a good line
to use in your defense
149
00:06:51,278 --> 00:06:52,243
at the court martial.
150
00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:54,863
Thank you, Colonel Hogan.
151
00:06:54,898 --> 00:06:56,397
My court martial?
152
00:06:56,433 --> 00:06:57,899
Well, what can you do?
153
00:06:57,935 --> 00:07:00,146
I mean, you send the guards
out, the natives get restless.
154
00:07:00,170 --> 00:07:01,564
If you sit tight, the
camp burns down,
155
00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:03,621
and you're at fault.
156
00:07:03,656 --> 00:07:06,357
I figure we got about two hours.
157
00:07:07,377 --> 00:07:08,488
Hope Newkirk and LeBeau
158
00:07:08,512 --> 00:07:09,811
can hold it at the gates.
159
00:07:09,847 --> 00:07:11,491
I can't be sure of anything now.
160
00:07:11,515 --> 00:07:12,814
Hogan, wait a minute!
161
00:07:12,850 --> 00:07:15,416
What do these men
know about fires, huh?
162
00:07:15,452 --> 00:07:16,996
Oh, come on, that's like asking
163
00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:19,165
what Hitler knows
about rabble-rousing.
164
00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:21,300
Newkirk was a fire
warden in London.
165
00:07:21,324 --> 00:07:25,326
LeBeau was top man in
the fire brigade at camp.
166
00:07:25,362 --> 00:07:26,928
LeBeau?
167
00:07:26,964 --> 00:07:29,498
They called him LeSmokey.
168
00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:31,010
Of course, they
can't do miracles.
169
00:07:31,034 --> 00:07:32,367
Colonel Hogan,
170
00:07:32,402 --> 00:07:34,769
in view of the emergency,
do you think that they...
171
00:07:34,805 --> 00:07:36,483
Well, all I can do is ask them.
172
00:07:36,507 --> 00:07:38,918
Do so at once. Of course,
I'll have to go along with them.
173
00:07:38,942 --> 00:07:41,275
Ah, ah, ah, that is a
means of escaping.
174
00:07:41,311 --> 00:07:43,189
Oh, come on, you have
my word as an officer
175
00:07:43,213 --> 00:07:44,958
and a gentleman,
there'll be no escape.
176
00:07:44,982 --> 00:07:45,947
I will accept that.
177
00:07:45,983 --> 00:07:47,682
However, regulations require
178
00:07:47,718 --> 00:07:49,518
that you be
guarded at all times.
179
00:07:49,553 --> 00:07:52,353
I will send Sergeant
Schultz to accompany you.
180
00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:54,322
Just our luck.
181
00:07:54,357 --> 00:07:56,535
Toughest one of the
bunch. Okay, Schultz it is.
182
00:07:56,559 --> 00:07:58,026
Dismissed!
183
00:07:58,061 --> 00:07:59,895
Okay, Chief.
184
00:08:22,152 --> 00:08:23,152
Come on!
185
00:08:24,521 --> 00:08:27,488
Rest your back there.
186
00:08:29,492 --> 00:08:31,704
Hey, who invited Poppa Bear?
187
00:08:31,728 --> 00:08:33,494
Klink's idea. He's guarding us.
188
00:08:33,530 --> 00:08:36,097
You call this a forest fire?
189
00:08:36,132 --> 00:08:38,199
Well, it's a small forest.
190
00:08:38,234 --> 00:08:40,501
Looks ruddy dangerous to me.
191
00:08:40,537 --> 00:08:42,170
Not to me.
192
00:08:42,205 --> 00:08:45,006
There is something
going on here.
193
00:08:45,042 --> 00:08:46,207
All right, spread out, men.
194
00:08:46,242 --> 00:08:47,809
I think we can
establish a fire line.
195
00:08:47,844 --> 00:08:49,510
Fire line?!
196
00:08:50,547 --> 00:08:51,646
Jolly joker.
197
00:08:51,682 --> 00:08:53,114
Fire line.
198
00:08:58,889 --> 00:09:01,790
Hogan! Hogan, come back!
199
00:09:01,825 --> 00:09:04,993
Ah! Hogan, where are you?!
200
00:09:23,696 --> 00:09:24,996
Hande hoch! Schnell!
201
00:09:25,031 --> 00:09:26,659
English translation:
hands up and fast.
202
00:09:26,683 --> 00:09:28,027
Easy with that thing, baby.
203
00:09:28,051 --> 00:09:30,085
Who are you? What
are you doing here?
204
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:31,430
We're traveling to Dusseldorf.
205
00:09:31,454 --> 00:09:32,420
Is this the right road?
206
00:09:32,455 --> 00:09:34,489
Oh, yeah...
207
00:09:34,524 --> 00:09:36,891
but you are going in
the wrong direction.
208
00:09:36,927 --> 00:09:39,494
Okay, that's correct
recognition code.
209
00:09:39,529 --> 00:09:41,608
You're the fastest
gun in Germany.
210
00:09:41,632 --> 00:09:45,015
Ah, escaping prisoners?
211
00:09:45,051 --> 00:09:48,185
Oui, tired, hungry, alone...
212
00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:52,189
And very much in
need of a little affection.
213
00:09:52,225 --> 00:09:54,459
I am Margit,
214
00:09:54,494 --> 00:09:55,521
and that is Eva.
215
00:09:55,545 --> 00:09:57,045
Margit, Eva.
216
00:09:57,080 --> 00:09:58,579
We'll skip our names for now.
217
00:09:58,615 --> 00:10:00,515
Sure, what's in a name?
218
00:10:00,550 --> 00:10:03,018
It's love that counts.
219
00:10:03,053 --> 00:10:05,020
We're escaping, remember?
220
00:10:05,055 --> 00:10:06,198
Yeah, go ahead, escape.
221
00:10:06,222 --> 00:10:07,884
I'll catch up with you later.
222
00:10:07,908 --> 00:10:10,541
Margit, uh, perhaps they
would like some wine.
223
00:10:10,576 --> 00:10:12,210
Yeah, I will get it.
224
00:10:12,245 --> 00:10:13,211
And I will help you.
225
00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:14,556
Hey, I'll give you a hand.
226
00:10:14,580 --> 00:10:17,048
I said the short one was mine.
227
00:10:17,083 --> 00:10:19,962
What are you, the ruddy master
of ceremonies or something?
228
00:10:19,986 --> 00:10:21,719
All right, break it up.
229
00:10:21,754 --> 00:10:23,288
Watch the door.
230
00:10:23,323 --> 00:10:24,688
That's right, watch the door.
231
00:10:24,724 --> 00:10:26,057
Watch the...?
232
00:10:26,092 --> 00:10:28,559
Colonel, I'd rather
watch one of those girls.
233
00:10:28,594 --> 00:10:30,261
I mean, it's been two years.
234
00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:33,431
You heard me. Watch the
door... and that's an order.
235
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:36,968
Order? Why, we ain't
even in the same army!
236
00:10:42,776 --> 00:10:44,342
Can you help us?
237
00:10:44,377 --> 00:10:50,014
Certainly... but why
don't you take a rest first?
238
00:10:50,049 --> 00:10:52,417
You are safe here.
239
00:10:52,452 --> 00:10:54,285
Yeah, but are you?
240
00:10:54,321 --> 00:10:58,923
Well... one expects danger
in the kind of work I'm doing.
241
00:10:58,958 --> 00:11:00,758
Mm-hmm.
242
00:11:00,794 --> 00:11:03,205
Do you remember an
officer that came through here
243
00:11:03,229 --> 00:11:04,862
a couple of weeks ago?
244
00:11:04,897 --> 00:11:07,198
Yeah, Captain Warren.
245
00:11:07,233 --> 00:11:08,778
Mm-hmm. Has he been captured?
246
00:11:08,802 --> 00:11:10,368
Funny you should ask that.
247
00:11:10,403 --> 00:11:12,770
Why? I mean, accidents happen.
248
00:11:12,806 --> 00:11:13,771
We expect it.
249
00:11:13,807 --> 00:11:15,540
Was he taken?
250
00:11:15,575 --> 00:11:16,874
I don't know.
251
00:11:16,909 --> 00:11:20,211
Ah... I hope he made it.
252
00:11:20,246 --> 00:11:23,648
He was such a nice boy, too.
253
00:11:28,921 --> 00:11:30,554
Uh, hey, if that's for me,
254
00:11:30,590 --> 00:11:33,391
tell them I'm busy watching
the door instead of a girl.
255
00:11:33,426 --> 00:11:34,558
All right.
256
00:11:34,594 --> 00:11:37,728
Hello? Yes, this is Eva.
257
00:11:37,763 --> 00:11:40,731
Uh, I'm sorry, I can't
talk to you right now.
258
00:11:40,766 --> 00:11:42,911
Uh, would you mind
calling back, please?
259
00:11:42,935 --> 00:11:44,902
All right, thank you.
260
00:11:44,937 --> 00:11:46,904
Heil Hitler.
261
00:11:46,939 --> 00:11:48,906
Friend?
262
00:11:48,941 --> 00:11:52,076
No, the winter relief.
263
00:11:52,112 --> 00:11:53,911
Winter Hilfe, we call it.
264
00:11:53,946 --> 00:11:57,259
You know, they collect clothes
and things for the soldiers.
265
00:11:57,283 --> 00:11:59,950
Hm-hmm. They call
almost every week.
266
00:12:01,388 --> 00:12:04,188
You, uh...
267
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:06,369
you used your first name.
268
00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:12,196
Of course. Even in the war,
some people are friendly.
269
00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:14,732
I should hope so.
270
00:12:22,909 --> 00:12:24,708
Oh, boy.
271
00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:27,711
You'd better get a
move on, you know.
272
00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:29,713
You have to go
next to station two.
273
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:33,884
It's a farmhouse just a
few miles along this road.
274
00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:36,220
It's set back, the only
house. You can't miss it.
275
00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:37,888
Then what?
276
00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:40,224
You will be told
when you get there.
277
00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:41,892
Recognition code?
278
00:12:41,928 --> 00:12:43,561
There is none.
279
00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:46,564
Everyone who escapes
has to go through here first.
280
00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:50,234
That way, we keep it simple.
281
00:12:50,270 --> 00:12:51,735
Okay, we're moving out!
282
00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:53,404
You must be joking.
283
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:54,905
Colonel, have a heart!
284
00:12:54,941 --> 00:12:56,585
You heard me.
We're going. Let's go.
285
00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:58,254
But I forgot what
girls look like.
286
00:12:58,278 --> 00:13:00,911
I was just starting to remember.
287
00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:03,025
Hey, what about me?
I-I've just fallen in love...
288
00:13:03,049 --> 00:13:04,848
with the door.
289
00:13:04,884 --> 00:13:08,052
You've seen one door,
you've seen them all. Come on.
290
00:13:13,893 --> 00:13:15,560
Excuse me.
291
00:13:25,388 --> 00:13:26,354
Hi, Schultz.
292
00:13:26,389 --> 00:13:28,022
Hey, Colonel Hogan!
293
00:13:28,058 --> 00:13:29,357
Where have you been?
294
00:13:29,392 --> 00:13:30,358
Putting out a fire.
295
00:13:30,393 --> 00:13:31,525
You can say that again.
296
00:13:31,561 --> 00:13:34,028
Oh, there is something going on.
297
00:13:34,064 --> 00:13:36,865
First you disappear,
then you show up again.
298
00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:39,212
Oh, I have to report
this to the Kommandant,
299
00:13:39,236 --> 00:13:40,880
and then I take
you back to camp.
300
00:13:40,904 --> 00:13:42,614
You're right,
Schultz, do your duty.
301
00:13:42,638 --> 00:13:44,884
Into the truck. Schnell,
schnell, schnell, schnell.
302
00:13:44,908 --> 00:13:47,242
Go ahead. You heard the man.
303
00:13:48,912 --> 00:13:51,545
You know how to work
one of those things?
304
00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:53,559
What do you think, I'm stupid?
305
00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:55,549
One question at a time.
306
00:13:55,585 --> 00:13:58,887
Um, Schultz, why don't you
move away from the truck,
307
00:13:58,922 --> 00:14:00,721
cut down on the
heterodyne interference?
308
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:03,691
Don't you think I know that?
309
00:14:05,695 --> 00:14:08,997
Hello. Hello.
310
00:14:09,032 --> 00:14:11,165
Stalag 13?
311
00:14:11,201 --> 00:14:13,667
This is Sergeant
Schultz speaking.
312
00:14:13,703 --> 00:14:17,471
Stalag 13, please
come in, bitte.
313
00:14:17,524 --> 00:14:18,689
This is Colonel Klink.
314
00:14:18,725 --> 00:14:21,158
I read you, Sergeant. Report.
315
00:14:21,193 --> 00:14:23,177
He reads me.
316
00:14:23,212 --> 00:14:25,680
Herr Kommandant,
Herr Kommandant,
317
00:14:25,715 --> 00:14:28,349
here is Sergeant
Schultz standing here
318
00:14:28,385 --> 00:14:32,754
talking on his,
uh, walkie-talkie.
319
00:14:32,789 --> 00:14:34,355
Dummkopf! I know that.
320
00:14:34,391 --> 00:14:36,324
What about the fire?
321
00:14:36,359 --> 00:14:39,427
Herr Kommandant,
the fire is doing nicely.
322
00:14:39,462 --> 00:14:41,173
What's that sound I hear?
323
00:14:41,197 --> 00:14:43,531
It's a... it's a... it's
a very noisy fire,
324
00:14:43,566 --> 00:14:44,865
Herr Kommandant.
325
00:14:44,901 --> 00:14:46,801
Colonel Hogan!
326
00:14:48,188 --> 00:14:50,087
Colonel Hogan!
327
00:14:50,122 --> 00:14:52,590
Put out that fire immediately.
328
00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:54,892
Yes, sir! Yes-yes, sir.
329
00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:58,062
Colonel Hogan!
330
00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:06,003
LeBEAU: What's
the plan, Colonel?
331
00:15:06,038 --> 00:15:07,800
I'll go in first and case it.
332
00:15:07,824 --> 00:15:09,791
If I'm not back in ten
minutes, take the truck,
333
00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:11,793
find Schultz and the
boys and get back to camp.
334
00:15:11,828 --> 00:15:13,205
What, and-and
leave you in there?
335
00:15:13,229 --> 00:15:16,163
If it is a trap, you want to come
barging in and get knocked off, too?
336
00:15:16,199 --> 00:15:17,376
But, Colonel, we are a team.
337
00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:18,833
Come on, you've got your orders.
338
00:15:18,868 --> 00:15:22,337
Remember, ten minutes...
back to camp, understood?
339
00:15:22,372 --> 00:15:23,516
All right, sir. Okay.
340
00:15:23,540 --> 00:15:24,672
Good luck, sir.
341
00:15:24,708 --> 00:15:27,068
Bonne chance, Colonel.
342
00:15:35,551 --> 00:15:36,867
Oh, Willy!
343
00:15:36,903 --> 00:15:38,486
Everybody, nice and quiet.
344
00:15:38,521 --> 00:15:39,787
Sir, we do not...
345
00:15:39,822 --> 00:15:41,222
You, over by the fireplace.
346
00:15:41,257 --> 00:15:43,358
Lean forward with your hands.
347
00:15:43,393 --> 00:15:46,561
You stay right there, lady,
in case I have to shoot you.
348
00:15:47,930 --> 00:15:50,030
That's naughty.
349
00:15:50,066 --> 00:15:51,899
Get back over there.
350
00:15:54,571 --> 00:15:57,872
And no sudden moves unless
you want to die suddenly.
351
00:15:57,907 --> 00:16:00,975
Sir, please... you
are a prisoner.
352
00:16:01,010 --> 00:16:02,844
Perhaps we can help you.
353
00:16:02,879 --> 00:16:05,157
Like you helped Captain Warren?
354
00:16:05,181 --> 00:16:07,348
Ja. Ja. That's right.
355
00:16:07,384 --> 00:16:08,816
We helped him to escape.
356
00:16:08,852 --> 00:16:10,184
Sure you did.
357
00:16:10,219 --> 00:16:13,020
We are telling you
the truth, I swear it.
358
00:16:16,075 --> 00:16:18,408
Oh, no.
359
00:16:20,030 --> 00:16:23,197
Some goodies in
here I shouldn't see?
360
00:16:29,372 --> 00:16:32,440
Well... I bet you look beautiful
361
00:16:32,475 --> 00:16:33,541
in this, Fritz.
362
00:16:38,665 --> 00:16:40,197
Ten minutes.
363
00:16:40,232 --> 00:16:41,598
All right, let's go get him out.
364
00:16:41,634 --> 00:16:45,036
Wait. He gave us a direct
order: return to camp.
365
00:16:45,071 --> 00:16:46,871
Monsieur LeBeau. Oui?
366
00:16:46,906 --> 00:16:48,706
If you're going to
start obeying officers,
367
00:16:48,741 --> 00:16:50,541
we're going to lose
this bleeding war.
368
00:16:50,576 --> 00:16:52,910
Now, come on.
369
00:16:56,582 --> 00:16:58,049
Having a party, folks?
370
00:16:58,084 --> 00:17:02,153
Easy, mum, that's the
only colonel we've got.
371
00:17:02,188 --> 00:17:03,821
Louis. Oui?
372
00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:06,318
If either of these
old ponies move...
373
00:17:06,342 --> 00:17:07,642
Mm-hmm.
374
00:17:07,677 --> 00:17:08,910
Shoot them.
375
00:17:08,945 --> 00:17:10,311
Avec plaisir, mon vieux.
376
00:17:10,346 --> 00:17:12,480
He's French.
377
00:17:12,515 --> 00:17:13,814
Here we go, Colonel.
378
00:17:13,849 --> 00:17:15,816
Oh, it's only a
slight concussion.
379
00:17:15,851 --> 00:17:17,651
Be right as rain
in a year or two.
380
00:17:17,687 --> 00:17:19,153
Thanks a lot, Newkirk.
381
00:17:19,189 --> 00:17:20,588
You, too.
382
00:17:20,623 --> 00:17:22,156
Forgive me, Colonel Hogan.
383
00:17:22,192 --> 00:17:24,792
My husband thought
you were Gestapo.
384
00:17:24,827 --> 00:17:26,327
How do you know my name?
385
00:17:26,362 --> 00:17:27,895
Oh, the wallet.
386
00:17:27,930 --> 00:17:30,008
We have many escaped
prisoners come here.
387
00:17:30,032 --> 00:17:32,511
We had to be sure
you were not a spy.
388
00:17:32,535 --> 00:17:34,680
Ja, you came in with your gun.
389
00:17:34,704 --> 00:17:36,649
We thought it was
attempt to fool us.
390
00:17:36,673 --> 00:17:38,655
Hold on, Colonel.
391
00:17:38,691 --> 00:17:40,202
Are these two types straight?
392
00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:41,692
They're selling me fast.
393
00:17:41,728 --> 00:17:43,260
But they are Germans.
394
00:17:43,295 --> 00:17:44,261
Swedish.
395
00:17:44,296 --> 00:17:46,163
Yeah. We lived a
long time in Germany.
396
00:17:46,199 --> 00:17:47,531
They accept us.
397
00:17:47,566 --> 00:17:50,601
Hey... this uniform.
398
00:17:50,636 --> 00:17:52,803
It has saved us many times.
399
00:17:52,839 --> 00:17:53,949
Look, what's the routine?
400
00:17:53,973 --> 00:17:55,818
After you get a prisoner
from the Kaiserhof,
401
00:17:55,842 --> 00:17:56,807
where do you send 'em?
402
00:17:56,843 --> 00:17:58,375
We do not send them.
403
00:17:58,410 --> 00:18:00,288
No, they-they tell us
where to send them.
404
00:18:00,312 --> 00:18:01,511
Who does the telling?
405
00:18:01,547 --> 00:18:03,513
Eva, one of the
girls at the inn.
406
00:18:03,549 --> 00:18:04,793
She telephones us.
407
00:18:04,817 --> 00:18:06,228
Ja. It's how we planned it
408
00:18:06,252 --> 00:18:07,218
in the beginning.
409
00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:08,719
It works very well.
410
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:11,972
Answer it.
411
00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:16,810
Hello?
412
00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:19,225
Yes, the package has arrived.
413
00:18:19,249 --> 00:18:21,982
I understand.
414
00:18:22,018 --> 00:18:25,052
A change in plans.
415
00:18:25,087 --> 00:18:27,133
Jawohl. I will take care of it.
416
00:18:27,157 --> 00:18:30,491
Wiedersehen.
417
00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:34,662
The instructions are for you
to take the South Road today,
418
00:18:34,697 --> 00:18:36,330
not the north as usual.
419
00:18:36,366 --> 00:18:37,476
It's safer.
420
00:18:37,500 --> 00:18:39,033
It's very decent of them.
421
00:18:39,068 --> 00:18:40,834
Oh, they're very good girls.
422
00:18:40,870 --> 00:18:42,836
Yeah, a couple of dolls.
423
00:18:42,872 --> 00:18:44,850
Did they also mention
that the Gestapo
424
00:18:44,874 --> 00:18:46,006
would be waiting for us?
425
00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:48,008
What?!
426
00:18:48,044 --> 00:18:50,344
Eva and Margit?
427
00:18:50,380 --> 00:18:52,346
Yeah. Look, Newkirk...
428
00:18:52,382 --> 00:18:54,527
get on the phone, use
that Kraut voice of yours.
429
00:18:54,551 --> 00:18:56,228
Call Gestapo
headquarters and tell 'em
430
00:18:56,252 --> 00:18:58,197
get over to the Kaiserhof
with a couple of men
431
00:18:58,221 --> 00:18:59,632
to pick up some
escaped prisoners.
432
00:18:59,656 --> 00:19:01,300
And tell 'em they're
wasting their time
433
00:19:01,324 --> 00:19:02,535
staked out on the South Road.
434
00:19:02,559 --> 00:19:04,792
Uh, whom shall I
say is calling, sir?
435
00:19:04,827 --> 00:19:07,947
Tell 'em it's an
anonymous tip. Right.
436
00:19:12,185 --> 00:19:14,329
Guten Tag, Fraulein.
437
00:19:19,025 --> 00:19:22,159
Ja, schnell. Danke.
438
00:19:22,195 --> 00:19:24,506
I've got a great
talent for languages.
439
00:19:24,530 --> 00:19:26,864
Too bad it doesn't
include German.
440
00:19:28,201 --> 00:19:30,334
Didn't they give you
instructions at the farmhouse?
441
00:19:30,369 --> 00:19:32,347
Yeah, they told us to
take the South Road.
442
00:19:32,371 --> 00:19:33,838
That's right.
443
00:19:33,873 --> 00:19:36,841
But we just had to come
back and see you, chèrie.
444
00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:39,343
Est très jolie, non?
445
00:19:39,378 --> 00:19:41,345
Oh, très, très.
446
00:19:41,380 --> 00:19:43,680
Colonel Hogan, I think
it's a terrible mistake
447
00:19:43,716 --> 00:19:45,182
for you and your
men to stay here.
448
00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:47,017
I think you should
move on immediately.
449
00:19:47,053 --> 00:19:48,530
To the South Right. Road, huh?
450
00:19:48,554 --> 00:19:50,699
Colonel, come on, what
about a drop more wine?
451
00:19:50,723 --> 00:19:52,367
You know, this is
one of the best wars
452
00:19:52,391 --> 00:19:54,203
I've ever been
associated with. Right.
453
00:19:54,227 --> 00:19:56,894
Let's drink a toast to,
uh, Hitler's mustache.
454
00:19:56,929 --> 00:19:58,540
And to the defeat of Germany.
455
00:19:58,564 --> 00:19:59,964
Defeat of Germany.
456
00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:02,377
To the defeat of Germany.
457
00:20:02,401 --> 00:20:04,468
Down the hatch.
458
00:20:04,504 --> 00:20:05,714
Colonel Hogan!
459
00:20:05,738 --> 00:20:06,782
Hello. It's old Schultz.
460
00:20:06,806 --> 00:20:08,216
Hi, Schultz,
welcome to the party.
461
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:09,840
You'd better get
your own girl, Schultz.
462
00:20:09,876 --> 00:20:12,710
Colonel Hogan, what
are you doing here?
463
00:20:12,745 --> 00:20:14,077
You stole my truck.
464
00:20:15,114 --> 00:20:17,047
Hello, girls.
465
00:20:17,082 --> 00:20:19,049
Oh, you have done it this time.
466
00:20:19,084 --> 00:20:21,284
I have to report you
to the Kommandant.
467
00:20:21,320 --> 00:20:23,999
Don't get excited.
We were just...
468
00:20:24,023 --> 00:20:26,223
Uh-oh, the men
with the black suits.
469
00:20:26,258 --> 00:20:28,392
Well, it ain't the
ice cream man.
470
00:20:28,427 --> 00:20:30,506
Gestapo. Now you've done it.
471
00:20:30,530 --> 00:20:33,096
They're going to put
me into the cooler.
472
00:20:33,132 --> 00:20:36,600
Schultz, you may get lucky
and end up in Stalag 13.
473
00:20:40,423 --> 00:20:41,889
Nobody move.
474
00:20:41,924 --> 00:20:43,569
Who is moving?
475
00:20:43,593 --> 00:20:46,360
Luftwaffe Sergeant, what are
you doing here with these people?
476
00:20:46,396 --> 00:20:49,229
I know nothing. Nothing!
477
00:20:49,265 --> 00:20:50,743
He captured us. Yes, sir.
478
00:20:50,767 --> 00:20:53,167
If it hadn't been for him,
we'd have gotten clean away.
479
00:20:53,202 --> 00:20:54,380
Yeah, he was too smart for us.
480
00:20:54,404 --> 00:20:55,369
He tracked us down.
481
00:20:55,405 --> 00:20:57,371
What about it, Sergeant?
482
00:20:57,407 --> 00:20:59,239
Now I know something.
483
00:20:59,275 --> 00:21:00,574
I captured these men.
484
00:21:00,610 --> 00:21:02,876
They are my prisoners.
485
00:21:02,912 --> 00:21:05,646
Congratulations.
What is your name?
486
00:21:05,682 --> 00:21:08,182
Sergeant Schultz, Hans.
487
00:21:08,217 --> 00:21:10,017
Stalag 13.
488
00:21:10,052 --> 00:21:13,621
Serial number 23789.
489
00:21:13,656 --> 00:21:15,523
23789.
490
00:21:15,558 --> 00:21:17,692
All right, you've
done a fine job.
491
00:21:17,727 --> 00:21:18,959
Take them out.
492
00:21:18,994 --> 00:21:20,194
Jawohl, Captain.
493
00:21:20,229 --> 00:21:22,541
H'raus mit, you prisoners.
494
00:21:22,565 --> 00:21:24,543
Okay, but thanks
for trying, girls.
495
00:21:24,567 --> 00:21:25,533
You can't win them all.
496
00:21:25,568 --> 00:21:26,667
What are you saying?
497
00:21:26,703 --> 00:21:28,013
He's trying to compromise us.
498
00:21:28,037 --> 00:21:29,236
She's right.
499
00:21:29,271 --> 00:21:30,882
We have been working
with the Gestapo,
500
00:21:30,906 --> 00:21:32,568
reporting prisoners
trying to escape.
501
00:21:32,592 --> 00:21:33,891
I am aware of that,
502
00:21:33,926 --> 00:21:36,927
but you also seem very
friendly with these men.
503
00:21:36,963 --> 00:21:38,428
Well, they didn't
do anything, sir.
504
00:21:38,464 --> 00:21:40,998
They just tried to divert
you to the South Road.
505
00:21:41,033 --> 00:21:42,978
No, no, no. Yeah, you
can't hate them for that.
506
00:21:43,002 --> 00:21:44,713
Sure, made us feel
at home, gave us wine.
507
00:21:44,737 --> 00:21:46,003
Is that a crime?
508
00:21:46,038 --> 00:21:47,849
And drank a toast to
the defeat of Germany.
509
00:21:47,873 --> 00:21:49,239
I heard them!
510
00:21:49,274 --> 00:21:52,409
Oh, and such
nice-looking German girls.
511
00:21:52,444 --> 00:21:55,341
Shame on you. Shame.
512
00:21:55,365 --> 00:21:57,898
I am telling you,
they are lying to you!
513
00:21:57,933 --> 00:21:59,367
We did nothing but our duty.
514
00:21:59,402 --> 00:22:02,619
Your duty to us... and
to them, also, perhaps?
515
00:22:02,654 --> 00:22:03,570
What?
516
00:22:03,623 --> 00:22:04,588
We are very familiar
517
00:22:04,624 --> 00:22:06,757
with double agents, Fraulein.
518
00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:08,175
Put them in the car.
519
00:22:09,212 --> 00:22:11,846
Oh, you!
520
00:22:11,881 --> 00:22:13,848
The short one was mine.
521
00:22:13,883 --> 00:22:16,183
Sergeant, return your
prisoners to camp at once.
522
00:22:16,219 --> 00:22:18,185
Jawohl, Captain.
523
00:22:18,221 --> 00:22:20,520
Serial number 23789.
524
00:22:20,556 --> 00:22:22,890
I have it. Heil Hitler.
525
00:22:25,061 --> 00:22:27,361
All right.
526
00:22:27,396 --> 00:22:31,031
Gentlemen, may I present
Sergeant Schultz, hero.
527
00:22:31,067 --> 00:22:33,045
Sergeant Schultz, hero.
Sergeant Schultz, hero.
528
00:22:33,069 --> 00:22:35,881
Sergeant Schultz, hero.
Oh, by the way, Schultz...
529
00:22:35,905 --> 00:22:39,206
been to a good fire lately?
530
00:22:42,245 --> 00:22:44,044
A fire lately?
531
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:46,413
Oh, that's a good one!
532
00:22:52,088 --> 00:22:55,389
Sergeant, Colonel Hogan,
I have called you to hear
533
00:22:55,424 --> 00:22:58,392
a special communication
by General Burkhalter.
534
00:22:58,427 --> 00:23:00,561
But-but I-I have done nothing.
535
00:23:00,596 --> 00:23:01,795
I'm not guilty!
536
00:23:01,830 --> 00:23:03,881
You haven't heard it yet.
537
00:23:06,051 --> 00:23:08,352
"At the suggestion
of the Gestapo,
538
00:23:08,388 --> 00:23:12,022
"Sergeant Schultz is hereby
commended for efficiency
539
00:23:12,057 --> 00:23:14,091
in the performance of his duty."
540
00:23:14,126 --> 00:23:15,843
But I'm not guilty.
541
00:23:15,878 --> 00:23:17,188
Of course you are, Schultz.
542
00:23:17,212 --> 00:23:19,024
Guilty of efficiency
in guarding us
543
00:23:19,048 --> 00:23:20,859
while we were fighting the fire.
544
00:23:20,883 --> 00:23:22,016
Now, just a moment.
545
00:23:22,051 --> 00:23:23,984
The General has also
added a note to me.
546
00:23:24,036 --> 00:23:27,037
"Shouldn't a good man
like Sergeant Schultz
547
00:23:27,072 --> 00:23:30,874
"be transferred
to a combat unit?
548
00:23:30,910 --> 00:23:34,210
I leave it to your discretion."
549
00:23:34,246 --> 00:23:36,513
More good news, eh, Schultz?
550
00:23:36,549 --> 00:23:39,382
I'm so happy, I could cry.
551
00:23:39,418 --> 00:23:40,717
Good luck, Schultz.
552
00:23:40,753 --> 00:23:42,397
Some of those new
panzer units are fun,
553
00:23:42,421 --> 00:23:43,765
especially at the Russian front.
554
00:23:43,789 --> 00:23:45,901
I understand they have
a tank in your size now.
555
00:23:45,925 --> 00:23:48,491
Colonel Hogan...
556
00:23:49,528 --> 00:23:51,895
You'd like to see
him out of here,
557
00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:53,063
wouldn't you, Hogan?
558
00:23:53,098 --> 00:23:54,242
Well, I mean, I wouldn't...
559
00:23:54,266 --> 00:23:55,566
So you could make a shambles
560
00:23:55,601 --> 00:23:58,569
of our famous discipline
here at Stalag 13.
561
00:23:58,604 --> 00:24:02,172
It's uncanny the way he
gets into a man's mind.
562
00:24:02,207 --> 00:24:05,676
Hogan, you are an
open book to me.
563
00:24:05,711 --> 00:24:08,344
I'm sorry, Sergeant Schultz,
you cannot be transferred.
564
00:24:08,380 --> 00:24:09,680
We need you here.
565
00:24:09,715 --> 00:24:11,181
Tough luck, Schultz.
566
00:24:11,216 --> 00:24:12,849
Dismissed!
567
00:24:12,885 --> 00:24:15,886
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
568
00:24:23,729 --> 00:24:25,028
Colonel Hogan.
569
00:24:25,064 --> 00:24:26,029
Mm-hmm?
570
00:24:26,065 --> 00:24:29,700
I saw what you did. Danke.
571
00:24:29,735 --> 00:24:32,881
Schultz, I don't know how you'd
get through this war without me.
572
00:24:32,905 --> 00:24:34,537
I don't know.
573
00:24:34,573 --> 00:24:36,707
Colonel Hogan, if
you ever escape...
574
00:24:36,742 --> 00:24:37,874
Yeah?
575
00:24:37,910 --> 00:24:41,912
Be a good fellow
and take me with you.
37990
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